Charlie was not happy with me, or speaking to Edward. But at least Edward was allowed — during my designated visiting hours — inside the house again. I just wasn’t allowed out of it.
查理对我并不满意，也不愿和爱德华说话。但至少爱德华被允许——在我的探访时间内——再次出现在房子里了。在那之外就不行了。
School and work were the only exceptions, and the dreary, dull yellow walls of my classrooms had become oddly inviting to me of late. That had a lot to do with the person who sat in the desk beside me.
学校和工作是唯一的例外，教室里那些沉闷呆笨的黄色墙壁在过去不可思议的吸引着我。这和曾经坐在我身边的那个人有很大关系。
Almost everything was back to normal — The good, pre-zombie normal — in less time than I would have believed possible. The hospital welcomed Carlisle back with eager arms, not even bothering to conceal their delight that Esme had found life in L. A. so little to her liking. Thanks to the Calculus test I’d missed while abroad, Alice and Edward were in better to shape to graduate than I was at the moment. Suddenly, college was a priority (college was still plan B, on the off chance that Edward’s offer swayed me from the post-graduation Carlisle option). Many deadlines had passed me by, but Edward had a new stack of applications for me to fill out every day. He’d already done the Harvard route, so it didn’t bother him that, thanks to my procrastination, we might both end up at Peninsula Community College next year.
几乎一切都回到了原来的轨道上——那些善良的吸血鬼们也一如往常——比我预想的快。医院热烈欢迎卡莱尔的归来，毫不掩饰他们的欣喜——埃斯梅并不太喜欢洛杉矶的生活。多亏我不在的时候误掉的微积分考试，爱丽丝和爱德华比我以前更期盼毕业了。突然之间，大学成了重点（大学仍是B计划，以防万一爱德华动摇了我毕业后由卡莱尔转变的想法）。我已经度过了许多个最后期限，但是爱德华每天都有一大堆的申请表格让我填。他已经投递了哈佛大学，因此由于我的拖延，我们可能明年都要以在半岛社区学院而告终的事没有让他烦恼。
I wasn’t at liberty to go to La Push, and Jacob wasn’t coming to see me. He wouldn’t even answer my phone calls.
我无权去拉普什，雅各伯也不来看我。他甚至连我的电话都不接。
Almost, but not quite. There was the house arrest situation, for one thing. And for another, before the fall, I hadn’t been best friends with Jacob Black. So, of course, I hadn’t missed him then.
几乎是。但也不绝对。一则我受到了软禁；另一则，在秋天之前，我还不是雅各布 布雷克最好的朋友。因此，当然了，我至少没有错过他。
Edward had resumed his schedule from the beginning of the year, which put him in most of my classes again. My behavior had been such last fall, after the Cullens’ supposed move to L. A., that the seat beside me had never been filled. Even Mike, always eager to take any advantage, had kept a safe distance. With Edward back in place, it was almost as if the last eight months were just a disturbing nightmare.
从年初开始，我就幻想着爱德华还和以前一样继续他的日程安排，出现在我大多数的课堂上。从去年秋天开始，我就这么做了。自从库伦家搬到了洛杉矶，当然是假的了，我身边的座位就一直空着。即使是见缝插针的麦克也和我保持了一定距离。随着爱德华的归来，过去的那八个月简直就是一场噩梦。
I made these calls mostly at night, after Edward had been kicked out — promptly at nine by a grimly gleeful Charlie — and before Edward snuck back through my window when Charlie was asleep. I chose that time to make my fruitless calls because I’d noticed that Edward made a certain face every time I mentioned Jacob’s name. Sort of disapproving and wary… maybe even angry. I guessed that he had some reciprocal prejudice against the werewolves, though he wasn’t as vocal as Jacob had been about the “bloodsuckers.”
我多数在晚上打那些电话，就在爱德华被赶走之后——迅速的在酒店被严厉而又愉快的查理赶走——赶在查理睡觉之后爱德华从窗户溜回来之前。我挑好时间打那些无用的电话是因为我注意到每次我提到雅各布时，爱德华总会很敏感，有点不情愿，并且总是小心翼翼的。。。或许甚至时生气了。我猜他和狼人之间都有成见，尽管他不是雅各布所想的“鲜血猎食者”。
So, I didn’t mention Jacob much.
因此，我基本上不提雅各布。
With Edward near me, it was hard to think about unhappy things — even my former besi fnend, who was probably very unhappy right now, due to me. When I did think of Jake, I always felt guilty for not thinking of him more.
有爱德华陪伴的时候，我很难想起不开心的事——即使我曾经最好的朋友此刻正因为我而闷闷不乐。当我确实想起雅各布时，我经常为我对他的遗忘感到内疚。
The fairy tale was back on. Prince returned, bad spell broken. I wasn’t sure exactly what to do about the leftover, unresolved character. Where was his happily ever after?
童话故事重现了。王子归来，咒语被解除了。我不太清楚我能为过去的留念做些什么而犹豫不决。在那之后他的快乐从何寻起呢？
Weeks passed, and Jacob still wouldn’t answer my calls. It started to become a constant worry. Like a dripping faucet in the back of my head that I couldn’t shut off or ignore. Drip, drip, drip. Jacob, Jacob, Jacob.
几周过去了，雅各布还是不回我电话。我越来越担心他了。就像是我身后滴答作响的水龙头，我既关不了，也不是无视他。嘀嗒，嘀嗒，嘀嗒，雅各布，雅各布，雅各布。
So, though I didn’t mention Jacob much, sometimes my frustration and anxiety boiled over.
因此，尽管我不怎么提雅各布，但有时我却按捺不住沸腾了的失望和焦虑。
I’d varied my pattern, in hopes of a different response. I’d called Jake from work this time, only to get an unhelpful Billy. Again.
我的花样层出不穷，期待着一个不一样的反应。这次我在雅各布工作时找他，得到的又是一个为难的比利。
“It’s just plain rude!” I vented one Saturday afternoon when Edward picked me up from work. Being angry about things was easier than feeling guilty. “Downright insulting!”
“这是不礼貌的！”一个星期六的下午，爱德华打断了我的工作，我大声的朝他发泄。乱发脾气显然要比内疚容易的多。“实在是太无礼了！”
“That he was there, and wouldn’t walk three steps to get to the phone! Usually Billy just says he’s out or busy or sleeping or something. I mean, it’s not like I didn’t know he was lying to me, but at least it was a polite way to handle it. I guess Billy hates me now, too. It’s not fair!”
“他就在那儿，只要走三步就能拿起电话！平常比利只会说他不在或是在忙或是睡觉或是别的什么。我是说，不是我不知道他在对我说谎，但至少这还算是个礼貌的处理方式。我猜连比利现在都讨厌我了。这不公平！”
“Billy said he didn’t want to talk to me,” I fumed, glaring at the rain oozing down the passenger window.
“比利说他不想和我说话”我气坏了，凶狠狠的盯着雨渗下车窗。
“Feels that way,” I muttered, folding my arms across my chest. It was no more than a stubborn gesture. There was no hole there now — I could barely remember the empty feeling anymore.
“你试试”我嘟囔着，双手环在胸前。这是个顽固的姿势。现在那儿没有洞——我几乎要忘记空洞洞的感觉了。
“It’s not you, Bella,” Edward said quietly. “Nobody hates you.”
“不是你，贝拉”爱德华安静的说道。“没有人讨厌你”
“Jacob knows we’re back, and I’m sure that he’s ascertained that I’m with you,” Edward said. “He won’t come anywhere near me. The enmity is rooted too deeply.”
“雅各布知道我们回来了，我确信他已经知道我和你在一起，”爱德华说。“他不会来接近我的。敌意太深了。”
“There’s still good reason to keep a safe distance.”
“还是有个好理由来保持距离。”
I glared blindly out the windshield, seeing only Jacob’s face, set in the bitter mask I hated.
我茫然的望着挡风玻璃外，只能看见雅各布的脸，躲在我厌恶的那张仇恨的面具内。
“That’s stupid. He knows you’re not… like other vampires.”
“那太蠢了。他知道你不……喜欢其他吸血鬼。”
“Bella, we are what we are,” Edward said quietly. “I can control myself, but I doubt he can. He’s very young. It would most likely turn into a fight, and I don’t know if I could stop it before I know –” he broke off, and then quickly continued. “Before I hurt him. You would be unhappy. I don’t want that to happen.”
“贝拉，我们自己决定命运”爱德华平静的说着。“我可以控制自己，但是我确定他可以。他还年轻。这很可能转变成一场战争，而我不知道我是否能阻止它，在我还没伤——”他顿了顿，接着快速的继续“在我还没伤害他之前。你会不开心的。我不想看到那发生。”
He looked away from me, staring into the rain. In front of us, the red light I hadn’t noticed turned green and he started forward again, driving very slowly. Not his usual way of driving.
他的视线离开了我，望向雨中。在我们面前，我没注意到的红灯变绿了。他再次发动了车子，行驶的很缓慢。不是他平常的行驶方式。
I remembered what Jacob had said in the kitchen, hearing the words with perfect recall in his husky voice. I’m not sure that I’m even-tempered enough to handle that… You probably wouldn’t like it so much if I killed your friend. But he’d been able to handle it, that time…
我想起了雅各布在厨房说过的话，我能听见那些字母在他沙哑的喉咙里久久的回荡着。我不确定我有一幅好脾气去处理那个……你可能不会喜欢我杀掉了你的朋友。但是他能够处理，那次……
But that was ridiculous. Impossible.
但是那很荒谬。不可能的。
“Edward Cullen,” I whispered. “Were you about to say ‘killed him? Were you?”
“爱德华·库伦”我低声说道。“你会考虑说‘杀掉他’吗？你会吗？”
I stared at him with my mouth hanging open, but he continued to look straight ahead. We were paused at the corner stop sign.
我的嘴微张着盯着他，但是他一直直视着前方。我们在路边停了下来。
“I would try… very hard… not to do that,” Edward finally said.
“我会试着……非常努力……不去那么做，”他最后还是说了。
Abruptly, I remembered what had happened to Paris when Romeo came back. The stage directions were simple: They fight. Paris falls.
猛然之间，我想起来当罗密欧回来时巴黎发生了什么。舞台上的指示一目了然：他们开战了。巴黎沦陷。
“Well,” I said, and took a deep breath, shaking my head to dispel the words in my head. “Nothing like that is ever going to happen, so there’s no reason to worry about it. And you know Charlie’s staring at the clock right now. You’d better get me home before I get in more trouble for being late.”
“好，”我深深地吸一气，摇了摇头，想把这些事情从脑中驱散，“那样的事情永远不会发生，所以没有理由去担心这个。你知道查理现在在盯着闹钟看时间吧。你最好快点把我送回家，免得惹上更多的麻烦。”
I slid closer, clutching his arm as I followed his gaze to see what he was seeing. I don’t know what I expected — maybe Victoria standing in the middle of the street, her flaming red hair blowing in the wind, or a line of tall black cloaks… or a pack of angry werewolves. But I didn’t see anything at all.
我靠过去，抓住他的手臂，我顺着他的视线望过去。我不知道我期望看到什么，没准维多利亚正站在路中央，她火红的头发在风中飞舞。或者是一排黑色的长斗篷……或者一群愤怒的狼人。但是我什么都没看到。
“You’re already in more trouble, Bella,” he whispered through unmoving lips.
“你已经有大麻烦了，贝拉。”他嘴唇一动不动地低声说道。
Every time I looked at his face, that impossibly perfect face, my heart pounded strong and healthy and very there in my chest. This time, the pounding raced ahead of its usual besotted pace. I recognized the expression on his statue-still face.
每一次我看到他的脸，那张完美到不可思议的脸庞，我的心都会更加剧烈的跳动。这一次比平常的速度还要快一点，我很欣赏他平静如塑像般的脸上的表情。
“What? What is it?”
“什么？到底是什么东西？”
I turned my face up toward him, to smile halfheartedly.
我抬头望向他，淡淡地笑了一下。
He looked down at me then, and his expression was calm enough to ease some of my panic.
这个时候他低头望向我，他的表情很平静，这使我稍微安心一点。
“My dad?” I screeched.
“我爸爸？”我尖叫道。
He took a deep breath. “Charlie…”
他深吸一口气“查理……”
“Charlie… is probably not going to kill you, but he’s thinking about it,” he told me. He started to drive forward again, down my street, but he passed the house and parked by the edge of the trees.
“查理……很可能不会杀了你，但是他正在考虑要不要这么做。”他告诉我。他重新发动车子向我家开去，但是他顺着街道开过了我家的房子，然后停在了树林边处。
What had I done to deserve this? Charlie was going to be so mad — and worse than that, he was going to be hurt and worried. Didn’t he have enough to deal with already? I would have never imagined that Jake could be so petty and just plain mean. Tears sprang, smarting, into my eyes, but they were not tears of sadness. I had been betrayed. I was suddenly so angry that my head throbbed like it was going to explode.
我到底做了什么要受到这处罚呢？查理将会变得很疯狂，更糟糕的是，他还会受到伤害，为我感到担心。难道现在他需要处理的事情还不够多吗？我真无法相信杰克怎么可以如此的卑鄙，低劣。我的眼中含着泪水，但这不是伤心的泪水。我被背叛了，这突如其来的愤怒，使我头上青筋暴起，好像要炸掉了一般。
Edward glanced back at Charlie’s house. I followed his gaze, and noticed for the first time what was parked in the driveway next to the cruiser. Shiny, bright red, impossible to miss. My motorcycle, flaunting itself in the driveway.
爱德华看向查理的房子。我顺着他的目光看去，然后注意到了挨着巡逻车停在车道边上的东西，发亮，亮红，很引人注意，让人无法忽视。我的摩托车，正停在车道上招摇。
“What did I do?” I gasped.
“我做了什么？”我气喘吁吁的说。
Edward had said that Charlie was ready to kill me, so he must know that — that it was mine. There was only one person who could be behind this treachery.
爱德华说查理准备杀了我，所以他肯定知道这辆摩托车是我的，而出卖我的人只能有一个。
“No!” I gasped. “Why? Why would Jacob do this to me?” The sting of betrayal washed through me. I had trusted Jacob implicitly — trusted him with every single secret I had. He was supposed to be my safe harbor — the person I could always rely on. Of course things were strained right now, but I didn’t think any of the underlying foundation had changed. I didn’t think that was changeable!
“不！”我愤怒地叫道，“为什么？为什么雅各布要这样对我？”这种被背叛的打击刺痛了我的全身。我心里是如此的信任雅各布——信任到把每一个秘密都告诉他。他就好像是我安全的避风港，是一个我可以一直依赖人。当然，虽然现在的情况改变了，但我并不认为我们感情奠定的基础变了，我不觉得这基础是可以改变的。
Why did Edward have to be so much faster than me?
为什么爱德华总是比我快这么多呢？
That stopped me cold — took the fight right out of me. My hands went limp. They fight; Paris falls.
这停止了我的愤怒——没有我的战争。我的手一下子软了下来。他们开战，巴黎沦陷。
“Is he still here?” I hissed.
“他还在那儿吗？”我不满的发出嘶嘶声。
“Jacob Black wants to see me. That’s why he’s still here.”
“雅各布·布莱克想见我。所以他还在那儿。”
I was furious, but not that furious.
我陷入一种暴怒中，但不是那样的暴怒。
I jumped out of the car, launching myself toward the trees with my hands already balled into fists for the first punch.
我跳出了车，扑向树林，双手紧握成拳准备来个致命一击。
“Let me go! I’m going to murder him! Traitor!” I shouted the epithet toward the trees.
“让我走！我要杀了他！叛徒！”我对着树林的那一边大吼。
I glanced back at the house instinctively, and it seemed like the glossy red bike was all I could see. I was seeing red. My head throbbed again.
我本能的回头瞄了一眼房子，貌似我只能看见光亮的红色脚踏车。我看见了红色。我的头又胀了起来。
“Yes. He’s waiting for us there.” Edward told me, nodding toward the slender path that divided the dark fringe of the forest in two.
“恩，他在那儿等着我们。”爱德华告诉我，并朝那条把森林边界一分为二的蜿蜒小路点了点头。
He caught me around the waist before I made the path.
他在我成功之前拦住了我的腰。
“Charlie will hear you,” Edward warned me. “And once he gets you inside, he may brick over the doorway.”
“查理会听见的。”爱德华警告我。“一旦让他逮住了你，他很有可能会把门用砖给封了的。”
“Just give me one round with Jacob, and then I’ll deal with Charlie.” I struggled futilely to break free.
就让我和雅各布斗一次，之后查理我会处理的”我无力的挣扎着。
Edward smoothed my hair back from my face. “Don’t worry, he’s not here to fight me. He’s acting as… spokesperson for the pack.”
爱德华拿掉了遮在我脸上的头发。“别担心，他不是来和我开战的。他扮演着……那个群体里发言人的角色。”
“How much more?” My voice shook.
“还有呢？”我的声音颤抖着。
“Talk?” I asked.
“谈话？”我问道。
“More or less.”
“差不多吧。”
“Oh.”
“哦。”
Edward looked at the house again, then tightened his arm around my waist and pulled me toward the woods. “We should hurry. Charlie’s getting impatient.”
爱德华又看了一眼房子，紧紧搂着我的腰把我拖进了树林。“我们得快一点儿。查理越来越不耐烦了。”
We didn’t have to go far; Jacob waited just a short ways up the path. He lounged against a mossy tree trunk as he waited, his face hard and bitter, exactly the way I knew it would be. He looked at me, and then at Edward. Jacob’s mouth stretched into a humorless sneer, and he shrugged away from the tree. He stood on the balls of his bare feet, leaning slightly forward, with his trembling hands clenched into fists. He looked bigger than the last time I’d seen him. Somehow, impossibly, he was still growing. He would tower over Edward, if they stood next to each other.
我们不用走的很远，雅各布就在路那头不几步的地方等着。他倚在一棵长满青苔的大树上，僵硬的脸上写满愤怒，我就知道是这样。他看了看我，又看了看爱德华。雅各布拉长嘴，生硬的嗤笑了一声，耸了耸肩站直了身子。他光着脚，向前倾着身体，握紧的拳头微微颤抖着。他比上一次我们见面时更强壮了。不知道怎么回事，几乎不可能的是，他仍然在生长。如果他们站在一起，雅各布会比爱德华高一些的。
But Edward stopped as soon as we saw him, leaving a wide space between us and Jacob. Edward turned his body, shifting me so that I was behind him. I leaned around him to stare at Jacob — to accuse him with my eyes.
我们一看到他，爱德华就不再前进了，在我们和雅各布之间留下很宽一段距离。爱德华转过来，把我挡在身后。我歪着身子盯着雅各布——用我的眼神指责他。
“Why?” I whispered, trying to hide the sound of the lump in my throat. “How could you do this to me, Jacob?”
“为什么？”我小声嘟囔着，尽力想隐藏我嗓子里结了块的声音。“你怎么能这么对我，雅各布？”
“Bella,” Jacob said as a greeting, nodding once toward me without looking away from Edward.
“贝拉，”雅各布盯着爱德华，向我点了点头算是打招呼。
The sneer vanished, but his face stayed hard and rigid. “It’s for the best.”
嗤笑不见了，但他的脸仍然很僵硬。“这是最好的办法。”
I would have thought that seeing his resentful, cynical expression would only make me angrier. Instead, it reminded me of the last time I’d seen him, with tears in his eyes. My fury weakened, faltered, as I stared at Jacob. It had been so long since I’d seen him — I hated that our reunion had to be like this.
我本以为看见他那让人讨厌的，愤世嫉俗的表情只会让我更生气。事实上，这反而让我想起上一次见他时他脸上的泪水。在我盯着雅各布时——我的愤怒被减弱着，犹豫着。
“What is that supposed to mean? Do you want Charlie to strangle me? Or did you want him to have a heart attack, like Harry? No matter how mad you are at me, how could you do this to him?”
“那是什么意思？你想让查理掐死我吗？还是你想让他心脏病突发就像哈利那样？不管你对我多么愤怒，你怎么能这么对他呢？”
“He didn’t want to hurt anyone — he just wanted to get you grounded, so that you wouldn’t be allowed to spend time with me,” Edward murmured, explaining the thoughts Jacob wouldn’t say.
“他不想伤害任何人——他只想你被看起来，这样你就不准再和我在一起了”爱德华嘟囔着，说出了雅各布不会说的想法。
Jacob winced, and his eyebrows pulled together, but he didn’t answer.
雅各布退了一步，眉毛都拧到一块了，但他没有回答。
Jacob’s eyes sparked with hate as he glowered at Edward again.
雅各布又一次瞪着爱德华，眼睛里迸发出厌恶的火星。
Jacob’s eyes flashed back to me, confused for the first time. “That’s why?” he asked, and then locked his jaw, like he was sorry he’d said anything.
雅各布的眼睛闪着光看向了我，第一次露出困惑的表情。“那是为什么？”他问道，收紧了下颚，像是为他所说的话道歉。
“Aw, Jake!” I groaned. “I’m already grounded! Why do you think I haven’t been down to La Push to kick your butt for avoiding my phone calls?”
“啊，杰克！”我抱怨道。“我已经被看起来了！你认为为什么你不接我电话，而我不去LA PUSH敲你屁股呢？”
“He thought I wouldn’t let you, not Charlie,” Edward explained again.
“他认为是我不让你去，不是查理，”爱德华又解释道。
“Stop that,” Jacob snapped.
“别说了，”雅各布打断了他。
“Yes,” Edward agreed in a soft voice. “But, before you begin, I need to say something.”
“是的，”爱德华温和的说道。“但是，在你开始之前，我需要说几句。”
Jacob shuddered once, and then gritted his teeth as hard as his fists. “Bella wasn’t exaggerating about your… abilities,” he said through his teeth. “So you must already know why I’m here.”
雅各布立刻颤抖起来，来回磨着锋利的牙齿就像他的拳头一样坚硬。“贝拉 没有夸大你的……能力”声音从他牙缝里蹦出来。“那你已经已经知道我为什么在这儿了。”
Edward didn’t answer.
爱德华没回答。
Jacob waited, clenching and unclenching his hands as he tried to control the shivers rolling down his arms.
雅各布等待着，咬紧牙齿，捏紧拳头，极力的控制着手臂自上而下的颤抖。
“Thank you,” Edward said, and his voice throbbed with the depth of his sincerity. “I will never be able to tell you how grateful I am. I will owe you for the rest of my… existence.”
“谢谢你”爱德华，他的声音在跳动，露出十分的诚意。“我无法告诉你我有多么感激。我应该将我之后的……存活归功于你。”
“Edward –,” I started to say, but he held one hand up, his eyes on Jacob.
“爱德华——”我开始说话，但他举起了一只手，眼睛看着雅各布。
Jacob raised one black brow.
雅各布挑起了一道黒眉。
Edward shook his head. “That’s not in my power.”
爱德华摇了摇头。“那不在我能力范围内。”
Understanding washed over Jacob’s face before the hard mask returned. “I didn’t do it for your benefit.”
雅各布恍然大悟，随即又戴上了僵硬的面具。“我不是为你做的。”
“Never,” I whispered, still locked in Edward’s eyes.
“绝不，”我低声说道，仍然忘情的陷在爱德华的眼睛里。
“For keeping Bella alive,” Edward clarified, his voice rough and fervent. “When I… didn’t.”
“因为你让贝拉继续活下去，”爱德华澄清了，他的嗓音粗糙而热情。“在我……没做到的时候。”
“I know. But that doesn’t erase the gratitude I feel. I thought you should know. If there’s ever anything in my power to do for you…”
“我知道。但是那不能抹去我的感激。我觉得你应该知道。如果在我能力范围内有什么能为你做的……”
“Whose, then?” Jacob growled.
“那是谁的？”雅各布怒吼着。
Edward looked down at me. “Hers. I’m a quick learner, Jacob Black, and I don’t make the same mistake twice. I’m here until she orders me away.”
爱德华低头看着我。“她的。我是个聪明学生，雅各布 布雷克，我不会再犯第二次相同的错误。我就在这儿直到她赶我走。”
I was immersed momentarily in his golden gaze. It wasn’t hard to understand what I’d missed in the conversation. The only thing that Jacob would want from Edward would be his absence.
我瞬间沉浸于他金眸的凝视中。我错过的谈话并不很难理解。雅各布唯一想从爱德华那儿要走的就是他的离开。
Jacob stared at him blankly, his shudders stilled by surprise. He exchanged a quick glance with me, but my face was just as mystified.
雅各布茫然的看着他，在巨大的惊讶之中，颤抖停止了。他飞快的瞥向我，但我的脸上尽是神秘。
Jacob made a gagging sound.
雅各布干咳了一声。
Jacob kept his eyes on Edward “I just needed to remind your bloodsucking friends of a few key points in the treaty they agreed to. The treaty chat is the only thing stopping me from ripping his throat out right this minute.”
雅各布一直盯着爱德华。“我只想要提醒你的鲜血猎食者朋友注意他们签署了的协定中的一些关键。协定中唯一阻止我们咬破他喉咙的东西就是现在。”
“The hell it — ” was all he managed to choke out.
“他妈的——”他像是设计好似的噎住了。
I unwillingly broke free from Edward’s gaze to frown at Jacob. “Was there something else you needed, Jacob? You wanted me in trouble — mission Accomplished. Charlie might just send me to military school. But that won’t keep me away from Edward. There’s nothing that can do that. What more do you want?”
我不情愿地从爱德华的眼神中挣脱出来，向雅各布皱眉头。你还需要别的什么吗，雅各布？你想让我陷入困境——任务完成了。查理可能送我去军校。但这不会让我远离爱德华。没有什么可以让我离开。你还要什么？”
“We haven’t forgotten,” Edward said at the same time that I demanded, “What key points?”
“我们没忘，”爱德华在我询问的同时答道。“什么关键？”
Jacob still glowered at Edward, but he answered me. “The treaty is quite specific. If any of them bite a human, the truce is over. Bite, not kill,” he emphasized. Finally, he looked at me. His eyes were cold.
雅各布仍然瞪着爱德华，但他回答了我。“协定很具体。如果他们中的任何一个咬了一个人类，协定就终止了。咬，但不杀死，”他强调着。最后，他看着我，眼睛冷冷的。
It only took me a second to grasp the distinction, and then my face was as cold as his. “That’s none of your business.”
我只用了一秒就领会了差别，之后我的脸像他的一样冷。“那和你无关”
My answer sent Jacob into near convulsions. He pressed his fists hard against his temples, closing his eyes tight and curling in on himself as he tried to control the spasms. His face turned sallow green under the russet skin.
我的回答引起了雅各布的痉挛。他捏紧拳头抵住太阳穴，紧紧闭住眼睛，缩成一团儿，尽力控制着。褐色的皮肤下，他的脸变成了病黄绿色。
“Jake? You okay?” I asked anxiously.
“雅各布？你还好吗？”我焦虑的问道。
I didn’t expect my hasty words to bring on such a strong response. Despite the warning he’d come to give, he must not have known. He must have thought the warning was just a precaution. He hadn’t realized — or didn’t want to believe — that I had already made my choice. That I was really intending to become a member of the Cullen family.
我不期盼我草率的话引起了这么强烈的反应。抛开他的警告，他一定不知道。我一定以为警告只是一个防备。他没有意识到——或者不想相信——我已经决定了。我是真的打算成为库伦家的一份子。
I took a half-step toward him, then Edward caught me and yanked me back behind his own body.
我朝他走了半步，之后爱德华抓住我把我揪回到他身后。
“Careful! He’s not under control,” he warned me.
“小心！他失去控制了，”他警告我。
Neither Edward or I missed the inflection, or the accusation it contained. A low hiss escaped Edward’s lips. Jacob clenched his fists reflexively.
我和爱德华都留心到了音调变化和包含之内的谴责。爱德华发出低低的嘘声。雅各布条件反射的捏紧拳头。
But Jacob was already somewhat himself again; only his arms were shaking now. He scowled at Edward with pure hate. “Ugh. I would never hurt her.”
但是雅各布好像又抑制住自己了，只有手臂还在颤抖。他沉下脸极度厌恶的对着爱德华。“饿。我绝对不会伤害她的。”
“Thanks.” The tremor in my voice ruined the sarcasm. I stared up the path, half-expecting Charlie to come barreling through the wet ferns like an enraged bull. I would be the red flag in that scenario.
“谢谢。”我声音中的战栗变成了讽刺。我盯着小路，有一点儿希望查理像一只狂躁的公牛般快速地穿过那些潮湿的蕨类。我会是那面红旗的。
Jacob’s furious expression faltered. “I am sorry about that,” he muttered. “I had to do what I could — I had to try…”
雅各布暴怒的表情缓和了一些。“我很抱歉”他嘟囔着。“我必须尽我所能——我不得不试着……”
“Just one more thing,” Edward said to me, and then he looked at Jacob. “We’ve found no trace of Victoria on our side of the line — have you?”
“还有一件事”爱德华对我说道，之后看看雅各布“我在我们的便捷里找不到维多利亚的踪迹。你们呢？”
All of us froze, listening to the silence that followed.
我们都冻住了一样，沉浸在那之后的寂静中。
I was the first to speak; my voice trembled. “Crap.”
我第一个张嘴，哆哆嗦嗦的说道。“该死。”
“BELLA!” Charlie’s roar echoed from the direction of the house. “YOU GET IN THIS HOUSE THIS INSTANT!”
“贝拉！”查理的咆哮声从房子那边传来。“你立刻给我回来！”
Ice shot down my spine.
冰冷的感觉侵蚀了我的脊梁。
“But then she took off like a bat out of hell. Near as we can tell, she caught your little female’s scent and bailed. She hasn’t come near our lands since.”
“但她就像只地狱里的蝙蝠一样消失了。我们能够辨认出，她寻着你的小妹妹的气味逃脱了。她再也没接近过我们的领地。”
He knew the answer as soon as Jacob thought it, but Jacob spoke the answer anyway. “Trie last time was while Bella was… away. We let her think she was slipping through — we were tightening the circle, getting ready to ambush her –“
雅各布一想到，他就知道答案了。但是 雅各布还是说出了回答。“维多利亚上次出现是在贝拉……离开的时候，我们让她以为自己已经逃脱了——我们缩小了包围圈，想要埋伏她——”
“Let’s go,” Edward said.
“我们走”爱德华说。
“You know how hard I’ve tried to keep that promise, but… I can’t see how to keep trying. Not now…” He struggled to keep his hard mask in place, but it wavered, and then disappeared. “Miss you,” he mouthed. One of his hands reached toward me, his fingers outstretched, like he wished they were long enough to cross the distance between us.
“你知道我要遵守那个保证有多难吗。但是……我不知道要怎么去保持了。不是现在……”他努力保持着自己那张僵硬的面具，但是它如此脆弱，随后就消失了。“我会想你的”他念道。他一只手伸向我，手指张着，似乎他希望它们够长能够穿越我们之间的距离。
Jacob shook his head slowly, and the lump in my throat nearly strangled me.
雅各布慢慢的摇着头，我嗓子里的结块几乎要使我窒息。
“Me, too,” I choked out. My hand reached toward his across the wide space. Like we were connected, the echo of his pain twisted inside me. His pain, my pain.
“我也是，”我啜泣着，手也伸向他。仿佛我们被联系在了一起，他的痛苦也缠绕着我。他的痛苦，我的痛苦。
“You promised,” I reminded him desperately. “Still friends, right?”
“你保证过的，”我拼命的提醒他。“还是朋友，对吗？”
Edward nodded. “When she comes back, she’s not your problem anymore. We’ll –“
爱德华点点头。“如果她再回来，就不会是你们的麻烦了。我们会——”
“She killed on our turf,” Jacob hissed. “She’s ours!”
“她在我们的地盘上杀人，”雅各布不屑的说道“她是我们的！”
“No –” I began to protest both declarations.
“不——”我既是拒绝也是声明。
“Sorry,” he whispered so low that I had to read his lips to understand. “Bye, Bells.”
“对不起，”他的声音这么低以至于我不得不读他的唇语才能理解。“再见，贝拉。”
“BELLA! I SEE HIS CAR AND I KNOW YOU’RE OUT THERE! IF YOU AREN’T INSIDE THIS HOUSE IN ONE MINUTE…” Charlie didn’t bother to finish his threat.
“贝拉！我看见他的车了，我知道你出去了！如果你在一分钟之内不回家……”查利没有费心去完成他的威胁。
I looked back at Jacob, torn. Would I see him again?
我回头看着雅各布，泪水奔涌而出。我还能再看见他吗？
His eyes were unreadable, his face expressionless. Cold. “No, it’s not.”
他的眼神我读不懂，他的脸上没有表情，那么冰冷。“不，不可以。”
“Let her go,” Jacob snarled, furious again. “She wants to!” He took two long strides forward. A glint of anticipation flashed in his eyes. His chest seemed to swell as it shuddered.
“让她走，”雅各布咆哮着，又一次狂怒起来。“她想！”他大大向前跨了两步。一种期待闪过他的眼睛。他的胸膛不停起伏，颤动着。
“It’s okay,” I promised him, looking up to read his face with trust in my eyes. He would understand.
“没关系的，”我向他保证，用信任的眼神抬头望向他，想读懂他脸上的表情。他会理解的。
“Jake…” I took a step toward him. I wanted to wrap my arms around his waist and erase the expression of misery on his face.
“杰克……”我迈向他，张开双臂想抱住他的腰，抹去他脸上的痛苦。
Edward pulled me back again, his arms restraining instead of defending.
爱德华再一次把我拉开，他更像在阻止而不是保护。
“No! Edward –!”
“不！爱德华！”
“ISABELLA SWAN!”
“伊莎贝拉·史旺！”
“Come on! Charlie’s mad!” My voice was panicked, but not because of Charlie now. “Hurry!”
“过来，查理要气疯了！”我惊慌失措的喊道，但并不是因为查理。“快点！”
Edward pushed me behind himself, wheeling to face Jacob.
爱德华把我推到他身后，旋转着面对雅各布。
Jacob watched us with a dark scowl on his bitter face. The anticipation drained from his eyes, and then, just before the forest came between us, his face suddenly crumpled in pain.
雅各布怒视着我们，脸上充满仇恨。他眼中的期待消退了，在我们消失于森林之前，他的脸上突然泛起了绝望的痛苦。
I tugged on him and he relaxed a little. He pulled me back slowly, always keeping his eyes on Jacob as we retreated.
我用力拖着他，他稍微放松了一点儿。他慢慢把我拉回去，边撤退边盯着雅各布。
I squared my shoulders and walked forward to meet my fate, with my destiny solidly at my side.
我挺了挺肩，阔步走向我的命运，和我命中注定的那位一起。
Edward kept his arm tight around my waist, holding me close. That was the only thing that held the tears inside my eyes.
爱德华一直紧紧搂着我的腰，我们如此靠近的贴在一起。那是唯一的武器，把我的泪锁在了眼睛里。
And right there I vowed that I would see him smile, and soon. I would find a way to keep my friend.
而就在那儿我发誓我要看到他的笑容，越快越好。我要找到办法留住我的朋友。
I had some serious problems.
我遇到了一些严重的问题。
My best friend counted me with his enemies.
我最好的朋友变成了我的敌人。
If I didn’t become a vampire soon, the Volturi would kill me.
如果我不尽快成为一个吸血鬼，维多利亚会杀了我。
I could face anything as long as that was true.
我可以面对任何真实存在的事情。
That was true. Edward was here, with his arms around me.
那是事实。爱德华就在这儿，用他的手臂搂着我。
Edward squeezed me gently. “I’m here.”
爱德华温柔的挤了下我。“我在这儿。”
I knew that last glimpse of his face would haunt me until I saw him smile again.
我知道望向他的最后那一眼会一直萦绕在我的脑海里直到我再次看到他的笑容。
Very serious problems. So why did they all suddenly seem insignificant when we broke through the last of the trees and I caught sight of the expression on Charlie’s purple face?
非常难缠的问题。那为什么当我们冲出了最后一个树，看到了查理酱紫色脸上的表情时，这一切都突然变得没有意义了呢？
I drew in a deep breath.
我做了一个深呼吸。
And now it seemed that if I did, the Quileute werewolves would try to do the job themselves — along with trying to kill my future family. I didn’t think they had any chance really, but would my best friend get himself killed in the attempt?
而现在看起来如果我那么做了，奎鲁特的狼人会亲手做这项工作——顺便杀掉我未来的家人。我不认为他们真的有任何机会，但我最好的朋友会在这样的企图中被杀掉吗？
Victoria was still on the loose, putting everyone I loved in danger.
维多利亚仍然在逃，把我爱的每一个人都推入危险之中。
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