第七章: 星期六 Saturday |《好兆头》双语小说在线阅读

The International Express delivery man rounded the corner at a careful thirty-five miles an hour, shifted down to second, and pulled up on the grass verge.

“国际速递”的速递员将车速保持在三十五英里，谨慎小心地拐过弯道，换到二挡，把车停在草地边缘。

“Shouldn’t be allowed, bloody lorries, no respect for other road users, what I always say, what I always say, is remember that without a car, son, you’re just a pedestrian too…”

“就不应该让它们上路，这些该死的大卡车，从不尊重其他行路人。我总是说，我总是说，要记住，孩子，没了车你也只是一名行人…”

He got up, picked up his glasses, put them back on, retrieved his parcel and clipboard, brushed the grass and mud from his uniform, and, as an afterthought, shook his fist at the rapidly diminishing lorry.

速递员站起身，捡起眼镜重新戴好。然后他取回包裹和笔记板，掸掉制服上的草叶和泥巴，随即亡羊补牢似的冲迅速远逝的卡车挥了挥拳头。

It was very early on Saturday morning, on the last day of the world, and the sky was redder than blood.

星期六，世界末日当天，黎明时分的天空比血还红。

He got out of the van, and immediately threw himself into a ditch to avoid an oncoming lorry that had barrelled around the bend at something well in excess of eighty miles an hour.

他走下面包车，旋即扑进一道地沟，避开以超过一百二十公里的速度拐过弯来的大卡车。

He climbed down the grassy verge, clambered over a low fence, and found himself beside the river Uck.

他走下路边草坡，翻过一道低矮的篱笆，来到阿克河畔。

The International Express delivery man walked along the banks of the river, holding the parcel.

速递员手里拿着邮包，沿河岸前行。

Farther down the riverbank sat a young man dressed all in white. He was the only person in sight. His hair was white, his skin chalk pale, and he sat and stared up and down the river, as if he were admiring the view. He looked like Victorian Romantic poets looked just before the consumption and drug abuse really started to cut it.

远处岸边坐着个一身缟素的年轻人。放眼望去，附近只有他孤零零的一个人。他发色银白，肤色惨白，坐在那里眺望上下游的河道，仿佛在欣赏风景。看上去完全像个维多利亚时期浪漫诗人在被肺病折磨或是瘾君子刚开始戒毒的样子。

Times changed, reflected the delivery man.

时代不同了，速递员心中暗想。

The International Express man couldn’t understand it. I mean, in the old days, and it wasn’t that long ago really, there had been an angler every dozen yards along the bank; children had played there; courting couples had come to listen to the splish and gurgle of the river, and to hold hands, and to get all lovey-dovey in the Sussex sunset. He’d done that with Maud, his missus, before they were married. They’d come here to spoon and, on one memorable occasion, fork.

国际速递的人感到无法理解。在过去，而且是并非久远的过去，这条河岸边每隔十几码就会有个钓鱼人。孩子们在这里玩耍，情侣来到这里，手牵着手聆听水流扑簌，在苏塞克斯郡的落日余晖中享受情意绵绵。他和莫德在结婚前，也常来这里谈谈情。在一次令人难忘的经历中，还曾做做爱。

Now white and brown sculptures of foam and sludge drifted serenely down the river, often covering it for yards at a stretch. And where the surface of the water was visible it was covered with a molecules-thin petrochemical sheen.

白色泡沫和棕色淤泥顺着河道缓缓流下，通常会覆盖方圆数米的范围。间或露出的水面上，也蒙着一层薄如分子的化工油膜。

He had reached the man in white.

他走到白衣男子身边。

Funny old world, thought the delivery man. Here’s the Uck, used to be the prettiest river in this part of the world, and now it’s just a glorified industrial sewer. The swans sink to the bottom, and the fishes float on the top.

世界真奇妙，速递员心想。这就是阿克河，过去曾是方圆百英里内最美的河流，如今只是一条壮丽的工业下水道。天鹅沉入水底，鱼群浮上水面。

Well, that’s progress for you. You can’t stop progress.

好吧，这就是发展。你无法阻挡发展的脚步。

There was a loud whirring as a couple of geese, thankful to be back in England again after the long, exhausting flight across the Northern Atlantic, landed on the rainbow-slicked water, and sank without trace.

一对水鸟扑打翅膀发出很大的声响。它们经过漫长疲惫的飞行，穿越北大西洋最终返回英国，欣慰地落在色彩缤纷的水面上，随即沉入河底，杳无痕迹。

“So beautiful,” he whispered. “It’s all so damn beautiful.”

“多美啊。”他轻声说，“真是美得要命。”

“‘Scuse me, sir. Party name of Chalky?”

“打扰一下，先生。您是收件人乔基？”

The delivery man found himself temporarily devoid of words. Then his automatic systems cut in. “Funny old world isn’t it and no mistake I mean you go all over the world delivering and then here you are practically in your own home so to speak, I mean I was born and bred ’round here, sir, and I’ve been to the Mediterranean, and to Des O’ Moines, and that’s in America, sir, and now here I am, and here’s your parcel, sir.”

速递员发现自己一时失语。接着他的自动反应系统跳了出来。“世界真奇妙，不是吗？别误会，我是说你周游世界递送包裹，结果最后几乎跑回家门口来了。我是说我生在此地，长在此地，先生。我刚去过地中海，然后是得梅因，那是个美国城市，先生，现在又跑回这里。您的包裹，先生。”

The man in white nodded, said nothing. He continued to gaze out at the river, following an impressive sludge and foam sculpture with his eyes.

白衣男子点点头，一语不发。他仍旧注视河流，目光随着那些骇人的泡沫淤泥缓缓移动。

Party name of Chalky took the parcel, and took the clipboard, and signed for the parcel. The pen developed a leak as he did so, and his signature obliterated itself as it was written. It was a long word, and it began with a P, and then there was a splodge, and then it ended in something that might have been — ence and might have been — ution.

收件人乔基接过包裹和笔记板，签下自己的名字。他签字时，钢笔漏了点墨水，名字刚刚写好就模糊了大半。这是个笔画繁多的名字，以三点水开始，然后是个墨团，第二个字下面似乎是个“不”也可能是个“木”。

“Much obliged, sir,” said the delivery man.

“万分感谢，先生。”速递员说。

He walked back along the river, back toward the busy road where he had left his van, trying not to look at the river as he went.

他沿着河岸往回走，去往停靠面包车的繁忙大路，视线竭力避开这条污水沟。

White stood up. There’s one thing you can say for air pollution, you get utterly amazing sunrises. It looked like someone had set fire to the sky.

怀特站起身。空气污染还是有个好处的，至少你能看到绝对匪夷所思的日出。感觉就像是有人在天上点了把火。

Behind him the man in white opened the parcel. In it was a crown — a circlet of white metal, set with diamonds. He gazed at it for some seconds, with satisfaction, then put it on. It glinted in the light of the rising sun. Then the tarnish, which had begun to suffuse its silver surface when his fingers touched it, spread to cover it completely; and the crown went black.

在他身后，白衣男子打开包裹。里面是一顶宝冠——一顶镶有钻石的白色金属环。男子满意地看了几秒钟，随即戴在头上。它在初升的阳光下熠熠生辉。接着一块暗斑从他手指接触的地方向四周蔓延，很快覆盖了银色表面。宝冠变得漆黑如墨。

It was nearly time.

就快到时候了。

Perhaps we will set fire to the sky, he thought. And he left that place, almost imperceptibly.

也许我们会在天上放火，他心想。怀特离开此地，行踪几乎难以察觉。

And a careless match would have set fire to the river, but, alas, there was no time for that now. In his mind he knew where the Four Of Them would be meeting, and when, and he was going to have to hurry to be there by this afternoon.

一根失手掉落的火柴就能在这条河上点把火，但是，唉，现在没时间了。怀特很清楚他们四人应该在何时何地碰面，他必须赶快上路，才能在今天下午到达。

Only one more delivery to make, then.

那么就剩一个要送了。

He read them again, paying particular attention to the address, and the message. The address was one word: Everywhere.

然后又读了一遍，特意看了看收件地址和那条消息。地址是一个词：无所不在。

The delivery man had left his van on the grass verge by the dual carriageway. He walked around to the driver’s side (carefully, because other cars and lorries were still rocketing around the bend), reached in through the open window, and took the schedule from the dashboard.

速递员刚才把车停在双车道马路的植草便道旁。他绕到驾驶员那一侧（始终小心翼翼，因为其他小车和卡车仍以疯狂的速度拐着弯），把手伸进打开的车窗，从仪表板上拿起日程表。

He read the instructions on the delivery voucher carefully.

他仔细读了遍收件凭单上的指示。

Then he put the schedule back on the dashboard, looked left, looked right, looked left again and began to walk purposefully across the road. He was halfway across when a German juggernaut came around the corner, its driver crazed on caffeine, little white pills, and EEC transport regulations.

他把日程表放回仪表板，看看左边，看看右边，又看看左边，然后毅然决然地走过马路。他刚走了一半，一辆德国产重型载货汽车突然拐过弯，它的司机已经在咖啡因、小白药片和欧共体运输规章的刺激下几近癫狂。

Then, with his leaking pen, he wrote a brief note to Maud, his wife. It read simply, I love you.

接着他用漏水的钢笔，给妻子莫德写了个便条。内容很简短：我爱你。

Then he looked down at the gutter.

接着他低头看了看排水沟。

“Yes, sir.” He wished he still had a throat. He could have swallowed, if he still had a throat. “No package, I’m afraid, Mister… uh, sir. It’s a message.”

“对，先生。”他真希望自己还有喉咙。如此一来，他就可以咽口唾沫了。“恐怕没有包裹，先生…呃，阁下。只是个口信。”

THANK YOU, it continued. I MUST COMMEND YOUR DEVOTION TO DUTY.

谢谢，它说，你的责任心值得嘉奖。

YES, agreed a voice from behind his left shoulder, or at least from behind the memory of his left shoulder.

对，一个声音从他左肩后方传来，至少是在他记忆中的左肩后方。

Cor, he thought, that one nearly had me.

上帝啊，他心想，这家伙差点儿撞到我。

FINALLY. There was a grin on its face, but then, given the face, there couldn’t have been anything else.

终于。它露齿一笑，但考虑到这张脸的特殊性，也不可能露出其他表情。

He watched its receding bulk.

速递员看着货车远去的背影。

Oh, he thought.

哦，他想。

The delivery man turned, and looked, and saw. At first he couldn’t find the words, couldn’t find anything, and then the habits of a working lifetime took over and he said, “Message for you, sir.”

速递员转身看去，发现了对方。起初他不知该说什么，也不知该做什么，但长期工作养成的习惯很快控制了他的行为。速递员说：“有您一条消息，先生。”

DELIVER IT, THEN.

那就说吧。

DON’T THINK OF IT AS DYING, said Death, JUST THINK OF IT AS LEAVING EARLY TO AVOID THE RUSH.

不要把它想成去世，死神说，就当是提前上路避开交通拥堵吧。

“Sir?” The late delivery man was falling through a gray mist, and all he could see were two spots of blue, that might have been eyes, and might been distant stars.

“阁下？”已故的速递员逐渐落入一片灰色雾气，他只能看到两点蓝光，可能是眼睛，也可能是远星。

FOR ME?

我的？

“It’s this, sir. Ahem. Come and See.”

“是这样的，阁下。嗯咳。快来吧。”

Witchfinder Sergeant Shadwell stood back with his head on one side. “Right, then,” he said. “Ye’re all ready. Hae ye’ got it all?”

猎巫人中士沙德维尔歪着脑袋向后退了一步。“嗯，要得。”他说，“齐活儿。东西侬都携上了吗？”

“Firelighters,” said Newt sadly. “And matches.”

“引火物。”牛顿丧气地说，“还有火柴。”

“Firelighters?”

“引火物？”

The delivery man had a brief moment to wonder whether his new companion was making a joke, and to decide that he wasn’t; and then there was nothing.

速递员心想这位新伙伴是不是在开玩笑，但很快得出了否定的答案。接着四周一片空茫。

“Pendulum o’ discovery?”

“探查钟摆？”

“Pendulum of discovery, yes.”

“探查钟摆，有。”

Newt swallowed, and patted a pocket. “Thumbscrew,” he said.

牛顿咽了口唾沫，拍拍口袋。“拇指夹。”他说。

“Thumbscrew?”

“拇指夹？”

“I really think, Sergeant, that –“

“中士，我真觉得…”

“Firelighters?”

“引火物？”

Yes.

没错。

“Yes, sir.”

“是，长官。”

[Note for Americans and other city-dwelling life-forms: the rural British, having eschewed central heating as being far too complicated and in any case weakening moral fiber, prefer a system of piling small pieces of wood and lumps of coal, topped by large, wet logs, possibly made of asbestos, into small, smoldering heaps, known as “There’s nothing like a roaring open fire is there?” Since none of these ingredients are naturally inclined to burn, underneath all this they apply a small, rectangular, waxy white lump, which burns cheerfully until the weight of the fire puts it out. These little white blocks are called firelighters. No one knows why.]

（为美国人及其他城居生命体提供的注释：英国乡村素来抵触中央供暖系统，认为其过于复杂，并且肯定会导致道德沦丧。他们更喜欢另一种供暖系统，把小木片和煤块掺在一起，上层辅以可能由石棉制成的大块潮湿圆材，全部堆成适合闷烧的小堆。这种系统被称为“再没有比噼啪作响的明火更好的东西了，不是吗？”。由于这些原料本身没有自燃倾向，所以在它们之下，还要放置一种类似蜡质的白色长方形小块，这种物质会剧烈燃烧，直到火堆的重量将其压灭。这种小白方块叫作引火物。谁也不知道为什么。）

Red sky in the morning. It was going to rain.

早晨天发红。雨水就快来。

Newt patted another pocket. It contained a paper bag inside which was a small bell, of the sort that maddens budgerigars, a pink candle of the birthday cake persuasion, and a tiny book called Prayers for Little Hands. Shadwell had impressed upon him that, although witches were the primary target, a good Witchfinder should never pass up the chance to do a quick exorcism, and should have his field kit with him at all times.

牛顿拍拍另一个口袋。里面有个纸包，包里有那种会让虎皮鹦鹉发疯的小铃铛，一支粉色生日蛋糕蜡烛，还有本名叫《儿童祈祷文》的小书。沙德维尔给他灌输了这样的观点，尽管首要目标是女巫，但一个优秀的猎巫人永远不该错过顺便进行驱魔工作的机会，而且随时要把战地装备包带在身上。

“Bell, book, and candle?”

“铃铛、书和蜡烛？”

“Bell, book, and candle,” said Newt.

“铃铛、书和蜡烛。”牛顿说。

“Pin?”

“大头针？”

“Pin.”

“大头针。”

Shadwell stood back. Newt noticed with amazement that the old man’s eyes had misted over.

沙德维尔退后一步。牛顿惊奇地发现老人双目有些潮红。

“I wish I was goin’ with ye,” he said. “O’ course, this won’t be anything, but it’d be good to get out and about again. It’s a tryin’ life, ye ken, all this lyin’ in the wet bracken spying on their devilish dancin’. It gets into yer bones somethin’ cruel.”

“俺希望跟侬一道去。”他说，“当然，没甚大不了的，但要能再次冲锋陷阵肯定特带劲。这是艰苦的营生，侬晓得，总要趴在潮湿的草丛中监视伊们跳魔鬼的舞蹈。苦痛会钻进你的骨头。”

“Good lad. Never forget yer pin. It’s the bayonet in yer artillery o’ light.”

“好小子儿。可不能忘了侬的大头针。它是光明军需品中的刺刀。”

He straightened up, and saluted.

他挺胸抬头，敬了个军礼。

“Off ye go, then, Private Pulsifer. May the armies o’ glorification march wi’ ye.”

“那就出发吧，二等兵帕西法。愿光辉的大军跟你一道儿。”

After Newt had driven off Shadwell thought of something, something that he’d never had the chance to do before. What he needed now was a pin. Not a military issue pin, witches, for the use of. Just an ordinary pin, such as you might stick in a map.

牛顿走后，沙德维尔想到了一件事，一件他之前从没机会去做的事。他现在需要一根大头针。不是用来对付女巫的军用大头针。只是普通的、那种可以插在地图上的大头针。

Shadwell finally found a pin among the debris in an ashtray. He breathed on it, polished it to a shine, squinted at the map until he located Tadfield, and triumphantly rammed the pin home.

沙德维尔最终从烟灰缸里的碎屑中翻出一根大头针。他吹了吹，把它擦亮，眯起眼睛检查地图，最终找到塔德菲尔德，随即心满意足地将大头针插在那里。

The map was on the wall. It was old. It didn’t show Milton Keynes. It didn’t show Harlow. It barely showed Manchester and Birmingham. It had been the army’s HQ map for three hundred years. There were a few pins in it still, mainly in Yorkshire and Lancashire and a few in Essex, but they were almost rusted through. Elsewhere, mere brown stubs indicated the distant mission of a long-ago witchfinder.

地图挂在墙上。它很旧。上面没有画出新兴城市米尔顿·凯恩斯，也没有哈洛镇，只是勉强标出了曼彻斯特和伯明翰的位置。它作为军方总部地图，已经有三百多年的历史。图上已经插了几根大头针，主要在约克郡和兰开夏郡，有些在艾塞克斯郡，全都锈迹斑斑了。其他地方，只有些棕色的断桩，显示出早年间一位猎巫人久远的任务。

Shadwell took a step backward, and saluted again. There were tears in his eyes.

沙德维尔后退一步，又敬了个礼，双目泛着泪花。

Then he did a smart about turn and saluted the display cabinet. It was old and battered and the glass was broken but in a way it was the WA. It contained the Regimental silver (the Interbattalion Golf Trophy, not competed for, alas, in seventy years); it contained the patent muzzle-loading Thundergun of Witchfinder-Colonel Ye-Shall-Not-Eat-Any-Living-Thing-With-The-Blood-Neither-Shall-Ye-Use-Enchantment-Nor-Observe-Times Dalrymple; it contained a display of what were apparently walnuts but were in reality a collection of shrunken headhunter heads donated by Witchfinder CSM Horace “Get them afore they Get You” Narker, who’d travelled widely in foreign parts; it contained memories.

接着老人利索地转过身，朝陈列柜敬礼。柜子陈旧残破，玻璃已经破裂，但从某种角度来说，它就是猎巫军。这里陈列着军团银奖（这是猎巫军高尔夫比赛的奖章，可惜这项赛事已经七十年没举办过了）；这里陈列着猎巫人上校汝不可吃任何血食亦不可施魔法或遵守时间·达里波的专用前膛装弹“雷电枪”；还有些看似是胡桃木的东西，但实际上是风干的猎头族脑袋，这是由猎巫人准尉霍勒斯·先下手为强·纳克捐赠的，他的足迹遍及世界各地；这里面陈列着历史。

It gleamed.

它闪闪发光。

Then he opened a tin of condensed milk for breakfast.

然后打开一罐炼乳作为早餐。

It was a mistake to think of Shadwell (Newt never found out if he had a first name) as a lone nut.

如果你认为沙德维尔（牛顿从不知道他到底有没有名字）是个孤独的傻瓜，那你就错了。

If the armies of glorification had tried to march with Newt, bits of them would have dropped off. This is because, apart from Newt and Shadwell, they had been dead for quite a long time.

如果光辉的大军试图与牛顿同行，部分人马肯定要掉队。这是因为除了牛顿和沙德维尔以外，他们都死了有段时间了。

It was just that all the others were dead, in most cases for several hundred years. Once the Army had been as big as it currently appeared in Shadwell’s creatively edited bookkeeping. Newt had been surprised to find that the Witchfinder Army had antecedents as long and almost as bloody as its more mundane counterpart.

只不过其他人都在几百年来的各种事件中去世了而已。这支部队曾和沙德维尔自己编造的薪水簿一样兵强马壮。牛顿早就惊奇地发现猎巫军的历史几乎和俗世间所有军队一样悠久，也几乎同样血腥。

You really got to rely on those ninepences. And so times had been a bit hard before Shadwell had gone on the payrolls of Heaven and Hell.

你真得靠这些九便士硬币过活。所以在沙德维尔得到天堂和地狱的薪水簿之前，猎巫军曾有段艰难岁月。

Shadwell blew his nose, noisily, on his sleeve.

沙德维尔在袖子上响亮地擤了擤鼻子。

The rates of pay for witchfinders had last been set by Oliver Cromwell and never reviewed. Officers got a crown, and the General got a sovereign. It was just an honorarium, of course, because you got ninepence per witch found and first pick of their property.

猎巫人的薪酬标准由奥利弗·克伦威尔最后一次修定，此后再未改动。军官是一克朗，将军是一沙福林。这当然只是象征性的薪酬，因为你每找到一名女巫就能得到九便士，还可以优先挑拣她们的财产。

Two farthings = One Ha’penny. Two ha’pennies = One Penny. Three pennies = A Thrupenny Bit. Two Thrupences = A Sixpence. Two Sixpences = One Shilling, or Bob. Two Bob = A Florin. One Florin and One Sixpence = Half a Crown. Four Half Crowns = Ten Bob Note. Two Ten Bob Notes = One Pound (or 240 pennies). One Pound and One Shilling = One Guinea.

2法新=1半便士。2半便士=1便士。3便士=1叁便士。2叁便士=1陆便士。2陆便士=1先令，或1鲍勃。2鲍勃=1弗罗林。1弗罗林＋1陆便士=1半克朗。4半克朗=1拾鲍勃。2拾鲍勃=1镑，或240便士。1镑＋1先令=1几尼金币。

Newt’s pay was one old shilling per year.

牛顿的报酬是每年一先令古币。

The British resisted decimalized currency for a long time because they thought it was too complicated.]

英国人很长时间内拒绝采用十进制货币单位，因为他们认为那太复杂。）

In return for this, he was charged to keep “glimmer, firelock, firebox, tinderbox or igniferous matches’ about his person at all times, although Shadwell indicated that a Ronson gas lighter would do very well. Shadwell had accepted the invention of the patent cigarette lighter in the same way that conventional soldiers welcomed the repeating rifle.

作为义务，他必须随时携带“云母片、燧石箱、火绒箱或引火火柴”，不过沙德维尔表示朗森打火机也完全够用。就像普通士兵们欢迎连发枪一样，沙德维尔接受了烟卷打火机的发明。

[NOTE FOR YOUNG PEOPLE AND AMERICANS: One shilling = Five Pee. It helps to understand the antique finances of the Witchfinder Army if you know the original British monetary system:

（为年轻人和美国人所作的注释：1先令=5便士。如果你了解当初的英国货币单位，将有助于理解猎巫军古老的财务系统：

Then he opened the car window, using a pair of pliers for the purpose since the handle had long since fallen off.

他用老虎钳打开车窗，因为摇把早就掉了。

The way Newt looked at it, it was like being in one of those organizations like the Sealed Knot or those people who kept on refighting the American Civil War. It got you out at weekends, and meant that you were keeping alive fine old traditions that had made Western civilization what it was today.

在牛顿看来，猎巫军就跟那些一次次穿戴好古时军服，再现英国内战或美国内战的人一样。它让你在周末有机会走出去进行室外活动，也意味着那些将西方文明塑造成如今这样的优良传统，在你手中得以传承。

An hour after leaving the headquarters, Newt pulled into a layby and rummaged in the box on the passenger seat.

离开总部后一个小时，牛顿将车停在路边，翻找起副驾驶座上纸箱里的东西。

The packet of firelighters was sent winging over the hedge. A moment later the thumbscrew followed it.

引火物包裹头一个飞过树篱，没过多久拇指夹就追随而去。

He knew what it was for. He’d done quite a lot of reading. Shadwell had piled him up with pamphlets at their first meeting, but the Army had also accumulated various books and documents which, Newt suspected, would be worth a fortune if they ever hit the market.

牛顿知道这是做什么用的。他已经读了不少东西。中士第一次跟他会面时，就拿出了一堆小册子，另外军队总部还收藏了许多书籍和文件。牛顿估计如果把这些东西拿去拍卖，能值不少钱。

He debated about the rest of the stuff, and then put it back in the box. The pin was Witchfinder military issue, with a good ebony knob on the end like a ladies’ hat pin.

他权衡着剩下的东西，最终还是放回盒子。这根大头针是猎巫人军用制式，头上有一小片黑檀木，就像女士的帽子别针。

Newt had never actually seen another one on the road, despite his best efforts. For years, and without much conviction, he’d enthused to his friends about its economy and efficiency in the desperate hope that one of them might buy one, because misery loves company.

尽管牛顿无时无刻不在努力寻找，但他从没在街上发现过第二辆绿芥末牌汽车。这些年来，尽管没什么说服力，但牛顿还是热心地向朋友们称颂它的省油特性和极佳效能，希望有人买上一辆。俗话说霉运总想成双。

The pin was to jab into suspects. If there was a spot on their body where they didn’t feel anything, they were a witch. Simple. Some of the fraudulent Witchfinders had used special retracting pins, but this one was honest, solid steel. He wouldn’t be able to look old Shadwell in the face if he threw away the pin. Besides, it was probably bad luck.

大头针是用来扎嫌疑犯的。如果她们身上某个地方没有任何感觉，那她们就是女巫。很简单。有些欺诈成性的猎巫人败类会用特制的回缩大头针，但牛顿这根是正经实心钢针。如果他把这东西扔了，就别想面对老沙德维尔。另外，这样做也许会带来霉运。

He started the engine and resumed his journey.

他发动引擎，重新上路。

Newt’s car was a Wasabi. He called it Dick Turpin, in the hope that one day someone would ask him why.

牛顿开的是一辆绿芥末牌日本车。他给这车起了英国著名路匪的名字——迪克·特平，希望会有人问他为什么要这样做。

It would be a very accurate historian who could pinpoint the precise day when the Japanese changed from being fiendish automatons who copied everything from the West, to becoming skilled and cunning engineers who would leave the West standing. But the Wasabi had been designed on that one confused day, and combined the traditional bad points of most Western cars with a host of innovative disasters the avoidance of which had made firms like Honda and Toyota what they were today.

日本人曾是从西方复制一切的魔鬼机器人，但如今已经超英赶美，变为兼具技术与智慧的工程师。极力追求准确的历史学家可以将这一转变的日期精确到天。但绿芥末牌汽车，就是在这难以界定的一天中设计出来的。它融合了西方车的传统缺点，和许多独具匠心的日本车缺陷。像丰田、本田这样的企业正是因为避免了这些缺陷，才得以成就如今的辉煌。

His friends nodded and agreed and privately decided that if ever it came to buying a Wasabi or walking, they’d invest in a pair of shoes; it came to the same thing anyway, since one reason for the Wasabi’s incredible m. p. g. was that fact that it spent a lot of time waiting in garages while crankshafts and things were in the post from the world’s only surviving Wasabi agent in Nigirizushi, Japan.

他的朋友们纷纷点头，随声附和，然后暗下决心，如果必须在购买绿芥末牌汽车和走路间选择，他们会买一双鞋。其实结果都是一样的，因为这辆车不可思议的节油性能，正是源于长时间停在修车厂中，等待全世界仅存的绿芥末牌代理商把机轴或其他部件邮寄过来。此人住在日本生鱼寿司市。

In vain did he point out its 823cc engine, its three-speed gearbox, its incredible safety devices like the balloons which inflated on dangerous occasions such as when you were doing 45 mph on a straight dry road but were about to crash because a huge safety balloon had just obscured the view. He’d also wax slightly lyrical about the Korean-made radio, which picked up Radio Pyongyang incredibly well, and the simulated electronic voice which warned you about not wearing a seatbelt even when you were; it had been programmed by someone who not only didn’t understand English, but didn’t understand Japanese either. It was state of the art, he said.

他会徒劳无功地指出绿芥末车823CC的引擎、三挡变速箱，以及不可思议的安全设备：特制安全气囊会帮你度过危急时刻——比方说以四十五英里的时速行驶在干爽大路上，却被一个巨大的安全气囊挡住视线而即将撞车时。他还略带抒情腔地称赞着车载朝鲜制收音机：能够接收到特别清晰的平壤广播。还有在你系好安全带时，仍会提醒你系好安全带的模拟电子语音提示系统。而且它是由某个既不懂英文又不懂日文的人编制成的。这辆车是种艺术，牛顿如是说。

The art in this case was probably pottery.

这里所说的艺术，大概是指制陶术。

It might have interested Newt to know that, of the thirty-nine thousand women tested with the pin during the centuries of witch-hunting, twenty-nine thousand said “ouch,” nine thousand, nine hundred and ninety-nine didn’t feel anything because of the use of the aforesaid retractable pins, and one witch declared that it had miraculously cleared up the arthritis in her leg.

牛顿也许有兴趣知道，在数世纪的猎巫史中，曾有三万九千名妇女接受过大头针检测，其中两万九千名说“哎呀”。由于如前所述的回缩针的应用，另外九千九百九十九名没有任何感觉。最后一名女巫声称它奇迹般地治好了自己腿上的关节炎。

In that vague, zen-like trance in which most people drive, Newt found himself wondering exactly how you used the pin. Did you say, “I’ve got a pin, and I’m not afraid to use it”? Have Pin, Will Travel… The Pinslinger… The Man with the Golden Pin… The Pins of Navarone…

大多数人开车时都会进入一种蒙眬恍惚、仿佛禅宗入定的精神状态。牛顿也不例外，他迷迷糊糊地揣测着到底该怎么使用大头针。用不用说“我有根大头针，我知道怎么用它”？大头针保镖…针侠…007之金针人…纳瓦隆大针…[1]【注：[1]分别来自香港武侠片《保镖》、斯蒂芬·金的小说《枪侠》《007之金枪客》和又名《六壮士》的“二战”经典影片《纳瓦隆大炮》。】

Her name was Agnes Nutter.

此人名叫艾格尼丝·风子。

One of the early entries in The Nice and Accurate Prophecies concerned Agnes Nutter’s own death.

在《精良准确预言书》很靠前的一个条目中，提到了艾格尼丝·风子的死亡。

She was the Witchfinder Army’s great failure.

她是猎巫军的奇耻大辱。

The English, by and large, being a crass and indolent race, were not as keen on burning women as other countries in Europe. In Germany the bonfires were built and burned with regular Teutonic thoroughness. Even the pious Scots, locked throughout history in a long-drawn-out battle with their arch-enemies the Scots, managed a few burnings to while away the long winter evenings. But the English never seemed to have the heart for it.

英国人总的来说是一个愚钝懒惰的民族，并不像欧洲其他国家那样热衷烧死妇女。德国人会以日耳曼民族一丝不苟的行事作风，定期堆建火刑堆。尽管与宿敌苏格兰人之间旷日持久的战争牵扯了他们大量精力，但虔诚敬神的苏格兰人也会设法点起几堆篝火，以此消磨漫漫冬夜。但英国人似乎从来没有这个心思。

One reason for this may have to do with the manner of Agnes Nutter’s death, which more or less marked the end of the serious witchhunting craze in England. A howling mob, reduced to utter fury by her habit of going around being intelligent and curing people, arrived at her house one April evening to find her sitting with her coat on, waiting for them.

其中一个原因可能就与艾格尼丝·风子的死有关。这件事差不多为英国猎巫狂潮画上了句号。一群喧闹嘶嚎的暴民，被艾格尼丝到处抖机灵显能耐的行为所激怒，在四月一日的夜晚来到她家，发现这位女巫正衣着整齐地坐在屋里等待他们。

Then she got up and hobbled slowly through the suddenly silent crowd, out of the cottage, and to the bonfire that had been hastily thrown together on the village green. Legend says that she climbed awkwardly onto the pyre and thrust her arms around the stake behind her.

接着她站起身，慢慢吞吞地穿过突然鸦雀无声的人群，来到小屋外，走向小镇绿地间匆忙堆起来的火刑堆。传说中讲到，她笨手笨脚地爬上柴堆，用胳膊圈住身后的木桩。

“Ye’re tardie,” she said to them. “I shoulde have beene aflame ten minutes since.”

“你们真磨蹭。”她对这些人说，“我十分钟前就该被点火了。”

“Tye yt well,” she said to the astonished witchfinder. And then, as the villagers sidled toward the pyre, she raised her handsome head in the firelight and said, “Gather ye ryte close, goode people. Come close untyl the fire near scorch ye, for I charge ye that alle must see how thee last true wytch in England dies. For wytch I am, for soe I am judged, yette I knoe not what my true Cryme may be. And therefore let myne deathe be a messuage to the worlde. Gather ye ryte close, I saye, and marke well the fate of alle who meddle with suche as theye do none understande.”

“捆结实点。”她对一脸震惊的猎巫人说。等到村民们磨磨蹭蹭地聚拢过来后，她在火光中仰起秀美的面庞，开口说道：“靠近我的柴堆，善良的人们。聚拢过来，直到火焰要将汝等烧灼，因我要汝等见证英国最后一位女巫之死。我是女巫，我因此获罪，但我不知道自己到底有何罪责。让我的死成为传达给世界的一个资讯。聚拢过来，好好记住胡乱插手未解之事者，会有何等下场。”

There was much subsequent debate as to whether this had been sent by God or by Satan, but a note later found in Agnes Nutter’s cottage indicated that any divine or devilish intervention had been materially helped by the contents of Agnes’s petticoats, wherein she had with some foresight concealed eighty pounds of gunpowder and forty pounds of roofing nails.

这件事引发了许多争论，人们猜测着降下灾祸的到底是上帝还是恶魔。但后来在艾格尼丝·风子小屋中发现的便条显示，任何可能存在的神圣或邪恶干涉，本质上都来源于艾格尼丝裙子里的东西。她深谋远虑地在里面藏了八十磅炸药和四十磅长钉。

What Agnes also left behind, on the kitchen table beside a note cancelling the milk, was a box and a book. There were specific instructions as to what should be done with the box, and equally specific instructions about what should be done with the book; it was to be sent to Agnes’s son, John Device.

艾格尼丝还留下一个盒子和一本书，就放在厨房里声明退订牛奶的便条旁。另外附有详细指示说明该如何处理这个盒子，也有同样详细的指示说明该如何处理这本书。它应该被寄给艾格尼丝的儿子约翰·仪祁。

And after that strange blasphemy she said no more. She let them gag her, and stood imperiously as the torches were put to the dry wood.

说完这句怪异的渎神之词后，她再也不发一语。艾格尼丝任由人们堵上自己的嘴，不可一世地站在那里，等人们把火炬扔在干柴堆上。

And, apparently, she smiled and looked up at the sky over the village and added, “That goes for you as welle, yowe daft old foole.”

接着她似乎露出微笑，抬头看着小镇上的天空，又补充道：“也包括你这个愚蠢的老傻瓜。”

The crowd grew nearer, one or two of its members a little uncertain as to whether they’d done the right thing, now they came to think about it.

村民们靠得更近了，有一两个人始终不太确定这样做到底是否正确，现在他们又开始思考这个问题。

Thirty seconds later an explosion took out the village green, scythed the valley clean of every living thing, and was seen as far away as Halifax.

三十秒后，小镇绿地上发生了一次大爆炸，扫平了山谷中所有活物，远在百英里之外的哈利法克斯都能看到这团火光。

The people who found it — who were from the next village, and had been woken up by the explosion — considered ignoring the instructions and just burning the cottage, and then looked around at the twinkling fires and nail-studded wreckage and decided not to. Besides, Agnes’s note included painfully precise predictions about what would happen to people who did not carry out her orders.

发现这东西的人住在临近村镇，被这场爆炸吵醒的他，考虑着要不要无视这些指示，直接把小屋烧掉。他环顾四周，看着荧荧火光和布满长钉的废墟，决定还是不要这么做。何况艾格尼丝的便条里，还有精确到令人难以忍受的预言，描述出如果一个人忤逆她的指令，会有什么下场。

The man who put the torch to Agnes Nutter was a Witchfinder Major. They found his hat in a tree two miles away.

为艾格尼丝·风子的火刑堆点火的是一名猎巫人少校。人们在两英里外的一棵树上发现了他的帽子。

If he’d known what was actually going to happen when that descendant met her he would have turned in his grave, except that he had never got one.

但如果他知道这两人相遇后会发生什么事，恐怕要在墓地里翻个身，只可惜他没有墓地。

His name, stitched inside on a fairly large piece of tape, was Thou-Shalt-Not-Commit-Adultery Pulsifer, one of England’s most assiduous witchfinders, and it might have afforded him some satisfaction to know that his last surviving descendant was now, even if unawares, heading toward Agnes Nutter’s last surviving descendant. He might have felt that some ancient revenge was at last going to be discharged.

他的名字就缝在一片相当大的帽带内侧：不可奸淫·帕西法，英国最勤勉的猎巫人之一。如果他知道自己仅存的后裔正——尽管是毫不知情地——驱车前往艾格尼丝·风子仅存的后裔的所在地，可能会稍感慰藉。他也许会觉得某些古老的仇怨终于要得以了结。

Firstly, however, Newt had to do something about the flying saucer.

但牛顿首先要对付的是飞碟。

It landed in the road ahead of him just as he was trying to find the Lower Tadfield turning and had the map spread over the steering wheel. He had to brake hard.

他把地图摊在方向盘上，试图找到通往下塔德菲尔德的岔道口。飞碟忽然降落在前方大路上。牛顿只得玩儿命踩刹车。

It looked like every cartoon of a flying saucer Newt had ever seen.

它跟牛顿看过的卡通片里的飞碟一模一样。

The other two ignored its frantic beeping and walked over to the car quite slowly, in the worldwide approved manner of policemen already compiling the charge sheet in their heads. The tallest one, a yellow toad dressed in kitchen foil, rapped on Newt’s window. He wound it down. The thing was wearing the kind of mirror-finished sunglasses that Newt always thought of as Cool Hand Luke shades.

另两个外星人没有理会胡椒粉罐疯狂的嘀嘀声，缓步走向牛顿，很像交警们在脑海中构思罚单时广泛采用的做派。最高的外星人是个穿保鲜膜的黄蛤蟆，它敲了敲车窗。牛顿把窗子摇下。那东西戴着的磨砂太阳镜，总让牛顿联想起老片《铁窗喋血》里那种墨镜。

As he stared over the top of his map, a door in the saucer slid aside with a satisfying whoosh, revealing a gleaming walkway which extended automatically down to the road. Brilliant blue light shone out, outlining three alien shapes. They walked down the ramp. At least, two of them walked. The one that looked like a pepper pot just skidded down it, and fell over at the bottom.

他从地图上抬起头，看向窗外。飞碟上有扇小门滑到一边，发出令人满意的咝咝声，一条发光的通道自动落向地面。门内亮起耀眼蓝光，勾勒出三个外星人的轮廓。它们走下斜坡。至少其中两个是走下来的。另外一个形似胡椒粉罐的家伙，应该说是滑下来的，而且到下面还摔了一跤。

The toad stared thoughtfully at the skyline.

蛤蟆若有所思地注视着地平线。

“Er. No.”

“呃。不知道。”

“Well, yes. I suppose so,” he said.

“哦，对。我想是的。”牛顿说。

“Morning, sir or madam or neuter,” the thing said. “This your planet, is it?”

“上午好，先生或女士或中性人。”那东西说，“这是您的星球，对吗？”

“Could you tell me your planet’s albedo, sir?” said the toad, still staring levelly at the horizon as though it was doing something interesting.

“您能告诉我您这个行星的反照率吗，先生？”蛤蟆始终注视着地平线，仿佛这么做很有意思。

The alien exchanged glances with its colleague. “Been letting the old acid rain build up, haven’t we, sir?” it said. “Been letting ourselves go a bit with the old hydrocarbons, perhaps?”

外星人们交换了一个眼神。“已经开始产生酸雨了，是不是，先生？”它说，“已经跟老碳氢化合物混得很熟了，对吗？”

The other alien, which was stubby and green, had wandered off into the woods by the side of the road. Out of the corner of his eye Newt saw it kick a tree, and then run a leaf through some complicated gadget on its belt. It didn’t look very pleased.

另一个绿色的矮胖外星人晃悠到路旁小树林边。牛顿用余光看到它踢了一棵树，然后用腰带上挂着的某个复杂仪器检测一片树叶。它看上去不太高兴。

“I’m sorry?”

“抱歉？”

“Well, I’m sorry to have to tell you, sir, that your polar ice caps are below regulation size for a planet of this category, sir.”

“好吧，我很遗憾地通知您，先生，您们的极地冰盖小于此类行星的标准面积，先生。”

“Had it long, have we, sir?” it said.

“已经拥有很长时间了，对吗，先生？”他说。

“Er. Not personally. I mean, as a species, about half a million years. I think.”

“呃。不是我个人的。我是说，作为一个种族，已经有五十多万年了。我听说。”

Newt brightened. “Well, er, I suppose,” he flailed, “what with Mankind’s, er, harnessing of the atom and –“

牛顿冷静下来。“哦，呃，我估计，”他说，“是因为人类，呃，驾驭了原子能和…”

“Oh?”

“哦？”

“The fact is, sir, that we have been asked to give you a message.”

“实际上，先生，我们接到指示要向您传达一条口信。”

Newt gabbled. “Oh. Er. I’ll see to it — well, when I say I, I mean, I think Antarctica or something belongs to every country, or something, and –“

牛顿结结巴巴地说：“哦。啊。我下次注意…嗯，我说‘我’的时候，意思是说南极洲什么的应该属于所有国家，或是地区，而且…”

“Have you got any idea why we have been asked to bring you this message, sir?” said the toad.

“您知道我们为什么要向您传达这个口信吗，先生？”蛤蟆说。

“Oh.” Newt turned this over in his mind. “Oh. That’s very kind.”

“哦。”牛顿反复思考着这句话，“哦。十分感谢。”

“Neither have we, sir.” The toad stood up. “One of them phenomena, I expect. Well, we’d better be going.” It shook its head vaguely, turned around and waddled back to the saucer without another word.

“我们也不知道，先生。”蛤蟆直起身，“我估计是因为某种现象。好了，我们该走了。”它略微摇摇头，转过身，晃晃悠悠地朝飞碟走去，再没说一个字儿。

“Oh, dear,” said Newt. He was wondering who he could tell about this, and realizing that there was absolutely no one who would believe him.

“哦，天哪。”牛顿说。他心想该把这个消息告诉谁，随即意识到绝不会有人相信自己。

“Message runs ‘We give you a message of universal peace and cosmic harmony an’ suchlike.’ Message ends,” said the toad.

“口信开始，‘我们向您传达一条关于世界和平和宇宙和谐之类的口信’，口信结束。”蛤蟆说。

The toad bent closer. It seemed to be worried about something, insofar as Newt was any judge of the expressions of an alien race he’d never encountered before.

蛤蟆略微弯下腰。在对前所未遇的外星种族的面部表情进行了有限判断理解后，牛顿发现蛤蟆有点忧虑。

“We’ll overlook it on this occasion, sir.”

“这次就先算了，先生。”

The small alien walked past the car.

另外那个小外星人从车旁走过。

Newt waited for a while, in case there were any spectacular light displays, but it just stood there. Eventually he drove up on the verge and around it. When he looked in his rear-view mirror it had gone.

牛顿等了一会儿，不想错过任何壮观的光线奇景，但飞碟只是停在那里。他最终开上路边的草地，绕了过去。当他朝后视镜看去时，飞碟已经不见了。

The Them were sitting on a field gate, watching Dog rolling in cowpats. The little mongrel seemed to be enjoying himself immensely.

“他们”坐在一个球门上，看着狗狗在牛粪堆里打滚儿。这只杂种狗似乎很是自得其乐。

“I’ve been reading about them,” he said, in a slightly louder voice. “Actually, they’ve been right all along and it’s wrong to persecute ’em with British Inquisitions and stuff.”

“我读了有关她们的文章。”亚当略微提高音调说，“实际上，她们一直都是对的，用英国宗教审判之类的玩意儿迫害她们才是错的。”

The two of them righted the third alien, dragged it back up the ramp, and shut the door.

它俩扶起第三个外星人，把它揪上坡道，舱门随即闭合。

Newt stuck his head out of the window.

牛顿把头探出车窗。

“Thank you!”

“谢谢！”

I must be overdoing something, he thought guiltily. But what?

我肯定有什么事干得太过火了，他愧疚地想，但到底是什么呢？

And I can’t even tell Shadwell, because he’d probably bawl me out for not counting their nipples.

另外这件事也不能告诉沙德维尔，他多半会破口大骂，因为我没数它们的乳头。

“Anyway,” said Adam, “you’ve got it all wrong about witches.”

“总之。”亚当说，“你们对女巫的理解都是错误的。”

“CO2 level up 0.5 percent,” it rasped, giving him a meaningful look. “You do know you could find yourself charged with being a dominant species while under the influence of impulse-driven consumerism, don’t you?”

“二氧化碳上升了0.5个百分点。”它粗声大气地说道，随即又意味深长地瞥了牛顿一眼，“您肯定明白，您们作为受冲动消费拜金主义影响的优势种群，是可能受到起诉的，不是吗？”

Pepper’s mother lectured at Norton Polytechnic. (During the day. In the evenings she gave Power tarot readings to nervous executives, because old habits die hard.)

佩帕的妈妈在诺顿工学院教书。（这是在白天。到了晚上，她会用塔罗牌给神经紧张的行政人员们占卜算命，因为老习惯很难改变。）

“My mother said they were just intelligent women protesting in the only way open to them against the stifling injustices of a male-dominated social hierarchy,” said Pepper.

“我妈妈说她们只是些智慧女性，通过这种唯一可行的方式，反抗男权社会统治集团施加给她们的令人窒息的歧视。”佩帕说。

“Yes, but your mother’s always saying things like that,” said Adam, after a while.

“对，但你妈妈老说这种话。”过了一会儿，亚当说道。

Pepper nodded amiably. “And she said, at worst they were just free-thinking worshippers of the progenerative principle.”

佩帕友善地点点头。“她还说，这些人至多不过是思想开放的生殖法则崇拜者。”

“Who’s the progenratty principle?” said Wensleydale.

“谁是生殖法则？”温斯利戴说。

“Well, I thought they worshipped the Devil,” said Brian, but without automatic condemnation. The Them had an open mind on the whole subject of devil worship. The Them had an open mind about everything. “Anyway, the Devil’d be better than a stupid maypole.”

“哦，我还以为她们崇拜魔鬼。”布赖恩说。但他说这话并没有谴责的意味。“他们”对恶魔崇拜毫无偏见。“他们”对任何事都没有偏见。“反正恶魔总比一根傻兮兮的五朔节花柱强。”

“That’s where you’re wrong,” said Adam. “It’s not the Devil. It’s another god, or something. With horns.”

“这你就说错了。”亚当说，“那不是恶魔。是另一尊神，或者其他玩意儿。有角。”

“Dunno. Something to do with maypoles, I think,” said Pepper vaguely.

“不知道。我估计大概跟五朔节花柱有关。”佩帕模棱两可地说。

Adam thought about it.

亚当想了想。

“Anyway,” said Pepper. “This stupid Pot can’t go around complaining if people think he’s the Devil. Not with having horns on. People are bound to say, oh, here comes the Devil.”

“总之，”佩帕说，“就算别人把他当成恶魔，这个傻蛋也没什么可抱怨的。头上长着对犄角。人们肯定要说，哦，这儿来了个恶魔。”

Adam, who seemed to have a weight on his mind, took a deep breath.

亚当似乎心情有点沉重，他深吸了口气。

“No,” said Adam patiently. “People just got ’em mixed up. He’s just got horns similar. He’s called Pan. He’s half a goat.”

“不。”亚当耐心地说，“人们只是把他们搞混了。他只是也长角。他叫潘，是希腊的林神，半人半羊。”

“The bottom half,” he said at length. “Fancy you not knowin’ that. I should of thought everyone knew that.”

“下一半。”他最终说，“没想到你们居然不知道。我还以为所有人都知道呢。”

“Goats haven’t got a bottom half,” said Wensleydale. “They’ve got a front half and a back half. Just like cows.”

“羊没有下一半。”温斯利戴说，“它们只有前一半和后一半。跟牛一样。”

“The Devil,” said Brian.

“恶魔。”布赖恩说。

“Which half?” said Wensleydale.

“哪一半是羊？”温斯利戴说。

Dog started to dig up a rabbit hole.

狗狗开始刨一个兔子洞。

Then Pepper said, “If he’s got goat legs, he shouldn’t have horns. They belong to the front half.”

佩帕说：“如果他有羊腿，就不该有犄角。那属于前一半。”

“I didn’t make him up, did I?” said Adam, aggrieved. “I was just telling you. It’s news to me I made him up. No need to go on at me.”

“他不是我编出来的，对吧？”亚当委屈地说，“我只是告诉你们。要是我编的才怪呢。你们没必要冲我来。”

They watched Dog some more, drumming their heels on the gate. It was too hot to think.

他们用脚踝敲打着球门，又看了会儿狗狗。天气热得让人懒于思考。

“You don’t have to be so lit’ral about everything,” he said. “That’s the trouble these days. Grass materialism. ‘s people like you who go round choppin’ down rain forests and makin’ holes in the ozone layer. There’s a great big hole in the ozone layer ‘cos of grass materialism people like you.”

“你们不要每件事都这么咬文嚼字。”他说，“这就是如今的问题。物质至上主义。就是像你们这样的人，到处砍伐雨林，还在臭氧层制造空洞。如今臭氧层有个超级大洞，就是因为你们这些物质至上主义者。”

“I can’t do anythin’ about it,” said Brian automatically. “I’m still paying off on a stupid cucumber frame.”

“那跟我一点关系都没有。”布赖恩条件反射地辩解道，“我连一片愚蠢的黄瓜园还没清理完呢。”

“It’s in the magazine,” said Adam. “It takes millions of acres of rain forest to make one beefburger. And all this ozone is leakin’ away because of…” he hesitated, “people sprayin’ the environment.”

“杂志上写了。”亚当说，“做一个牛肉汉堡要消耗数百万英亩雨林。而臭氧泄漏出去，也都是因为…”他顿了顿，“到处喷东西的人。”

“And there’s whales,” said Wensleydale. “We’ve got to save ’em.”

“还有鲸鱼。”温斯利戴说，“我们得保存这个种群。”

“There was this program about them,” explained Wensleydale.

“有个电视节目是讲它们的。”温斯利戴说。

“What’ve we got to save ’em for?” said Adam. He had confused visions of saving up whales until you had enough for a badge.

“咱们干吗要存鲸鱼？”亚当说。在他有些混乱的想象中，人们只有存够了奖章，才会考虑去存鲸鱼。

Adam looked blank. His plunder of New Aquarian’s back issues hadn’t included anything about whales. Its editors had assumed that the readers were all for saving whales in the same way they assumed that those readers breathed and walked upright.

亚当一脸茫然。他翻阅的《新水瓶座文摘》过刊中，没有提到任何有关鲸鱼的事。杂志编辑认定所有读者都会赞同拯救鲸鱼，就跟他们认定所有读者都会喘气而且直立行走一样。

“If they’re so clever,” said Brian, slowly, “what are they doin’ in the sea?”

“如果它们那么聪明，”布赖恩缓缓说道，“那跑到海里做什么？”

A squeal of brakes and a long — drawn-out crunch interrupted him. They scrambled off the gate and ran up the lane to the crossroads, where a small car lay on its roof at the end of a long skidmark.

一阵尖锐的刹车声和长时间的吱嘎声打断了他的思路。他们匆匆爬下球门，沿着小路跑到十字路口，一辆小汽车四轮朝天，躺在很长一段刹车胎痕的尽头。

“Oh, I dunno,” said Adam, looking thoughtful. “Swimmin’ around all day, just openin’ their mouths and eating stuff… sounds pretty clever to me –“

“哦，我不知道。”亚当若有所思地说，“整天游来游去，只要张嘴就能吃到东西…在我看来似乎挺聪明…”

Wensleydale paused and racked his memory. “Because they can sing. And they’ve got big brains. There’s hardly any of them left. And we don’t need to kill them anyway ‘cos they only make pet food and stuff.”

温斯利戴顿了顿，梳理着记忆。“因为它们会唱歌。而且有特别大的大脑。它们几乎快绝种了。而且咱们也不需要捕杀鲸鱼，因为它们只能做宠物食品之类的东西。”

A little further down the road was a hole. It looked as though the car had tried to avoid it. As they looked at it, a small Oriental-looking head darted out of sight.

在其后不远处的路上有个大洞。似乎这辆车曾试图躲避它。四人举目望去，一个东方人模样的小脑袋迅速缩回洞里。

“We shouldn’t move him,” he said. “Because of broken bones. We ought to get someone.”

“咱们不该动他。”他说，“也许有骨折。咱们应该去找人。”

The Them dragged the door open and pulled out the unconscious Newt. Visions of medals for heroic rescue thronged Adam’s head. Practical considerations of first aid thronged around that of Wensleydale.

“他们”拉开车门，把不省人事的牛顿拽了出来。由此义举赢得市民奖章的情景在亚当脑海中云集，急救学实用知识则在温斯利戴的脑海中云集。

She had been hoping, rather self-consciously, for someone tall, dark, and handsome.

她发自内心地希望见到一位身材高大、头发乌黑、相貌英俊的男子。

And in Jasmine Cottage Anathema Device was sitting in front of a table on which some bandages, aspirins, and assorted first-aid items had been laid out for the past hour.

而在茉莉小屋中，安娜丝玛·仪祁就坐在桌前。绷带、阿司匹林和各类急救用品已经在上面摆了一个小时。

Anathema had been looking at the clock. He’ll be coming around any moment now, she’d thought.

安娜丝玛刚才一直在查看时间，心想他随时可能出现。

Adam cast around. There was a rooftop just visible in the trees down the road. It was Jasmine Cottage.

亚当环顾四周。道路两旁的树林中只有一个屋顶隐约可见。那是茉莉小屋。

And then, when he got there, he wasn’t what she’d been expecting. More precisely, he wasn’t what she’d been hoping for.

但当他最终到来时，却和安娜丝玛的期望有所不同。更准确地说，他不是安娜丝玛幻想中的那种人。

Newt was tall, but with a rolled-out, thin look. And while his hair was undoubtedly dark, it wasn’t any sort of fashion accessory; it was just a lot of thin, black strands all growing together out of the top of his head. This was not Newt’s fault; in his younger days he would go every couple of months to the barber’s shop on the corner, clutching a photograph he’d carefully torn from a magazine which showed someone with an impressively cool haircut grinning at the camera, and he would show the picture to the barber, and ask to be made to look like that, please. And the barber, who knew his job, would take one look and then give Newt the basic, allpurpose, short-back-and-sides. After a year of this, Newt realized that he obviously didn’t have the face that went with haircuts. The best Newton Pulsifer could hope for after a haircut was shorter hair.

牛顿挺高，但却是豆芽菜身材。他的头发无疑是黑色，却不具备任何时尚造型，只是很多从脑袋顶上长出来的黑色细丝。这不是牛顿的错。他当年每隔一两个月就会去街角的理发店，手里攥着从杂志上小心撕下的画片，那上面总有个发型超酷的人冲镜头微笑。他会把图片给理发师看，要求剪成这个样子，谢谢。而经验丰富的理发师会看上一眼，然后给他剪个放之四海皆准的马桶盖基本型。一年后，牛顿意识到自己显然没有与各类发型相配的面容。牛顿·帕西法理过发后的最佳期望值，就是更短的头发。

It was the same with suits. The clothing hadn’t been invented that would make him look suave and sophisticated and comfortable. These days he had learned to be satisfied with anything that would keep the rain off and give him somewhere to keep his change.

这个问题同样出现在衣服上。能让他看起来温和、成熟或是顺眼的衣服，还没发明出来呢。如今他早已学会满足于任何能够挡风遮雨，外加存放零钱的服装。

I suppose I’m meant to feel a wave of warm, tender female something-or-other about this, she thought. I just wish he’d wash them.

我估计心中应该升起出自母性的温情暖意之类的玩意儿，安娜丝玛心想，希望他洗过脚。

And he wasn’t handsome. Not even when he took off his glasses. [Actually, less so when he took of his glasses, because then he tripped over things and wore bandages a lot.] And, she discovered when she took off his shoes to lay him on her bed, he wore odd socks: one blue one, with a hole in the heel, and one gray one, with holes around the toes.

而且他不帅。就算摘下眼镜也一样。（实际上，摘下眼镜后会更糟。因为他会被绊倒，身上缠一堆绷带。）另外，安娜丝玛替他脱下鞋子，想把他放到床上时，发现牛顿的袜子很奇怪：一只蓝的，脚后跟有洞，另一只灰的，脚趾处有好几个洞。

So… tall, dark, but not handsome. She shrugged. Okay. Two out of three isn’t bad.

那么…高个儿、黑发但不帅。她耸耸肩。好吧。三分之二，还不坏。

The figure on the bed began to stir. And Anathema, who in the very nature of things always looked to the future, suppressed her disappointment and said: “How are we feeling now?”

床上的男人动了动身子。安娜丝玛素来习惯向前看。她压抑住失望的心情，开口说：“咱们现在感觉如何？”

Newt opened his eyes.

牛顿睁开眼。

He was lying in a bedroom, and it wasn’t his. He knew this instantly because of the ceiling. His bedroom ceiling still had the model aircraft hanging from bits of cotton. He’d never got around to taking them down.

他躺在一间卧室里，但不是自己的卧室。一看到屋顶就知道了。他卧室屋顶上还用棉线挂着模型飞机。牛顿一直懒得把它们取下来。

“Car all right?” he said.

“车子还好吗？”他说。

This ceiling just had cracked plaster. Newt had never been in a woman’s bedroom before, but he sensed that this was one largely by a combination of soft smells. There was a hint of talcum and lily-of-the-valley, and no rank suggestion of old T-shirts that had forgotten what the inside of a tumble-dryer looked like.

这个屋顶只是带有裂痕的灰泥板。牛顿此前从没进过女士的卧房，但他感觉此处肯定就是，主要是因为一股融合了几种柔和香味的气息。这里有点爽身粉和铃兰百合香水的味道，完全没有已经忘记干洗机内部是什么样的旧圆领衫的汗味。

“You banged your head on the steering wheel,” said the voice that had roused him. “Nothing broken, though. What happened?”

“你的头撞到了方向盘。”把他唤醒的声音说道，“但没骨折。出了什么事？”

“See?” said Newt, to an invisible audience. “They knew how to build them in those days. That plastic finish hardly takes a dent.”

“看见了吧？”牛顿对不存在的听众们说，“当年的人就是知道怎么造车。塑料抛光面几乎不会有凹痕。”

He tried to lift his head up, groaned, and let it sink back onto the pillow. Pink, he couldn’t help noticing.

他试图抬起头，但呻吟了一声，又把头放回枕头。粉色，他情不自禁地注意到。

Newt opened his eyes again.

牛顿又睁开眼。

“Apparently. A little voice inside it keeps repeating ‘Prease to frasten sleat-bert.'”

“表面上没问题。里面有个声音不断重复说‘请急上安卷带’。”

He blinked at Anathema.

他冲安娜丝玛眨眨眼。

The figure walked around into his line of sight. It had dark hair, and red lips, and green eyes, and it was almost certainly female. Newt tried not to stare. It said, “If you have, no one’s going to notice.” Then she smiled. “Do you know, I’ve never met a witchfinder before?”

这个人形生物绕到牛顿的面前。它有黑发红唇和绿色眼眸，几乎可以肯定是女性。牛顿努力不让自己死盯着人家看。她说：“如果你疯了，也没人会发现。”接着她笑了笑。“知道吗，我还从没遇到过猎巫人。”

“I swerved to avoid a Tibetan in the road,” he said. “At least, I think I did. I think I’ve probably gone mad.”

“我为了避开路上的一个西藏人，被迫紧急转向。”他说，“至少我是这么觉得。我可能是发疯了。”

“I had to look inside,” she said.

“我必须查看一下。”她说。

“Er –” Newt began. She held up his open wallet.

“呃…”牛顿开口说，女子举起他打开的皮夹。

“It’s really just a hobby,” he said wretchedly. “I’m really a… a…,” he wasn’t going to say wages clerk, not here, not now, not to a girl like this, “a computer engineer,” he lied. Want to be, want to be; in my heart I’m a computer engineer, it’s only the brain that’s letting me down. “Excuse me, could I know –“

“其实这只是个业余爱好。”他可怜兮兮地说，“我其实是…是…”他不会说小职员，这里不行，现在不行，对这样的女孩不行，“电脑工程师。”他撒谎道。希望成为，希望成为。在内心深处，我就是电脑工程师，只是脑袋拖了后腿。“抱歉，我可否有幸…”

“Anathema Device,” said Anathema. “I’m an occultist, but that’s just a hobby. I’m really a witch. Well done. You’re half an hour late,” she added, handing him a small sheet of cardboard, “so you’d better read this. It’ll save a lot of time.”

“安娜丝玛·仪祁。”安娜丝玛说，“我是一名神秘学者，但那只是业余爱好。我其实是女巫。干得不错。你迟到了半小时。”她说着递给牛顿一张小硬纸片，“你最好读读这个。可以省不少时间。”

Newt felt extremely embarrassed, a not unusual state of affairs. Shadwell had given him an official witchfinder’s warrant card, which among other things charged all beadles, magistrates, bishops, and bailiffs to give him free passage and as much dry kindling as he required. It was incredibly impressive, a masterpiece of calligraphy, and probably quite old. He’d forgotten about it.

牛顿感觉极其尴尬，这倒不是什么新鲜事。沙德维尔给了他一张猎巫人正式委任卡，这东西为他带来一项特权，可以要求所有教区助理、地方治安官、主教和执法官免费提供任意数量的干燥引火物。这张委任卡特别华丽，可以说是件书法杰作，也许还相当古老。他已经忘了这码事。

Adam also had a small computer. He used it for playing games, but never for very long. He’d load a game, watch it intently for a few minutes, and then proceed to play it until the High Score counter ran out of zeroes.

亚当也有台小电脑。他用来打游戏，但从来玩不了多久。亚当会启动一个游戏，全神贯注地观察几分钟，然后开始玩，直到最高分计数器里的0用光。

“All you have to do is learn how to play it, and then it’s just easy,” he said.

“你们只需要搞清该怎么玩，然后就简单了。”他说。

When the other Them wondered about this strange skill, Adam professed mild amazement that everyone didn’t play games like this.

当“他们”对这神奇技艺叹为观止时，亚当只是略感好奇，为何别人不这样打游戏。

Newt did in fact own a small home computer, despite his boyhood experiences. In fact, he’d owned several. You always knew which ones he owned. They were desktop equivalents of the Wasabi. They were the ones which, for example, dropped to half-price just after he’d bought them. Or were launched in a blaze of publicity and disappeared into obscurity within a year. Or only worked at all if you stuck them in a fridge. Or, if by some fluke they were basically good machines, Newt always got the few that were sold with the early, bug-infested version of the operating system. But he persevered, because he believed.

尽管从童年时起就跟电器不睦，但牛顿的确有台小型家用计算机。实际上，他有好几台。你肯定知道他会买哪种电脑。它们就是绿芥末汽车的桌上等价物。它们是那种，比方说，他买到后第二天就降价一半的电脑。或是推出时声势浩大，但不出一年就销声匿迹的款式。或者只有塞进冰箱里才能正常工作的。即便他侥幸买到功能基本正常的电脑，也多半是极少数装有漏洞繁多的早期操作系统的机器。但牛顿还在坚持，因为儿时的信念始终活在他心中。

Newt kept finding his eye drawn to it.

牛顿发现自己的目光老往钟上瞟。

“The device.”

“仪器。”

Quite a lot of the front parlor in Jasmine Cottage was taken up, Newt noticed with a sinking feeling, with piles of newspapers. Clippings were stuck around the walls. Some of them had bits circled in red ink. He was mildly gratified to spot several he had cut out for Shadwell.

牛顿注意到一摞摞报纸，占据了茉莉小屋前厅的大部分空间，不觉心头一沉。四壁上贴满剪报。部分文章还用红笔勾出的重点。牛顿略感欣慰地发现，其中有些文章他曾替沙德维尔摘出来过。

Anathema owned very little in the way of furniture. The only thing she’d bothered to bring with her had been her clock, one of the family heirlooms. It wasn’t a full-cased grandfather clock, but a wall clock with a free-swinging pendulum that E. A. Poe would cheerfully have strapped someone under.

安娜丝玛的家具摆设特别少。她只随身带了一座钟，这可是传家宝。不是很大的古董老爷钟，而是一面挂钟，下面还有个摇来荡去的锋利钟摆；爱伦·坡如果见到，肯定想在下面绑个人。[2]【注：[2]在爱伦·坡的小说《陷坑与钟摆》中，作为宗教审判对象的主角，就被绑在一个巨大锋利的钟摆之下。】

In the last half hour Newt had heard some pretty unbelievable stuff and was close to believing it, but you have to draw the line somewhere.

在过去半个小时中，牛顿听过一些相当难以置信的话题，并且几乎快要相信了。但你总要画条底线。

“It was built by an ancestor of mine,” said Anathema, putting the coffee cups down on the table. “Sir Joshua Device. You may have heard of him? He invented the little rocking thing that made it possible to build accurate clocks cheaply? They named it after him.”

“那是我的一位祖先制造的。”安娜丝玛说着把咖啡杯放在桌上，“约书亚·仪祁爵士。你可能听说过他？他发明了那种可以滚动的小玩意儿，使得制造廉价精确时钟成为可能。人们用他的名字为其命名。”

“The Joshua?” said Newt guardedly.

“约书亚？”牛顿谨慎地说。

“I did my Ph. D. on them,” she said. “The people who invented things so simple and universally useful that everyone forgot that they’d ever actually needed to be invented. Sugar?”

“我的博士研究方向就是他们。”她说，“这些人发明了如此简单而常用的东西，以致所有人都忘了这些东西也需要有人发明出来。加糖吗？”

It didn’t.

事实并非如此。

She’d seemed to think it would explain everything.

安娜丝玛似乎觉得它足以解释一切。

It had a ruled line down the middle. On the left-hand side was a short piece of what seemed to be poetry, in black ink. On the right-hand side, in red ink this time, were comments and annotations. The effect was as follows:

卡片中间有一条竖线。左半边貌似是一首短诗，用黑墨水写成。右边是红墨水写的评论和注解。结果就变成了下面这个样子：

She looked at Newt’s blank expression.

她看到牛顿一脸迷茫。

“Er –“

“哦…”

“You normally have two,” said Anathema sweetly.

“你通常都加两块。”安娜丝玛甜甜地说。

“The device is named after a real person?” he said.

“仪器是以一个人的姓氏命名的？”他说。

“– who devised a gadget that made it possible to pump out flooded mineshafts. Or Pietr Gizmo? Or Cyrus T. Doodad, America’s foremost black inventor? Thomas Edison said that the only other contemporary practical scientists he admired were Cyrus T. Doodad and Ella Reader Widget. And –“

“…他设计出的小机件，使得泵干浸水的矿井竖坑成为可能。还有彼得·小发明？赛勒斯·T。小玩意儿，美国最重要的黑人发明家？托马斯·爱迪生曾说过，同时代的实用科学家中，只有赛勒斯·T。小玩意儿和埃拉·瑞德·小器具令他钦佩。还有…”

“Oh, yes. Fine old Lancashire name. From the French, I believe. be telling me next you’ve never heard of Sir Humphrey Gadget –“

“哦，对。优美的老兰开夏郡姓氏。我认为是来自法国。接下来你就要跟我说，从没听说过哈弗莱·小机件爵士了吧…”

“Oh, now come on –“

“呃，别逗了…”

Newt stared back at the card she’d handed him.

牛顿低头看向女孩递给自己的卡片。

Youre Bedde, achinge his |… willowfine = Aspirin

Youre Bedde， achinge his |… willowfine = Aspirin

“Another fine old Lancashire name,” said Anathema coldly. “If you don’t believe, read up on the witch trials of the early seventeenth century. She was an ancestress of mine. As a matter of fact, one of your ancestors burned her alive. Or tried to.”

“另一个优美的老兰开夏郡姓氏。”安娜丝玛平静地说，“如果你不相信，就去读读十七世纪早期的女巫审判记录。她是我的祖先。事实上，是你的一位祖先把她活活烧死了。或者说做出了这方面的尝试。”

with bruises be upon |… take in…

with bruises be upon |… take in…

“Have you ever heard of Agnes Nutter?” said Anathema.

“你听说过艾格尼丝·风子吗？”安娜丝玛说。

Newt’s hand went automatically to his pocket. His cigarette lighter had gone.

牛顿下意识地伸手摸了摸口袋。他的打火机不见了。

to come.

to come。

pyn yette his hart be | witchfinder?? Refers to

pyn yette his hart be | witchfinder？？ Refers to

clene, yette seed of myne | Pulsifer (cf. 002) Search

clene， yette seed of myne | Pulsifer（cf. 002）Search

be, untyl the Ende that is | (cf. 712, 3803, 4004)

be， untyl the Ende that is |（cf. 712， 3803， 4004）

means of flame from | 1990s!

means of flame from | 1990s！

hedd for willow fine, a | (cf.3757 Pin =

hedd for willow fine， a |（cf.3757 Pin =

own undoing, take the | for matches, etc. In the

own undoing， take the | for matches， etc. In the

himme for to mayk ryght |… hmm…

himme for to mayk ryght |… hmm…

chariot inverted be, four | Car smash… not serious

chariot inverted be， four | Car smash… not serious

manne who testeth with a | witchfinder (cf. 102) Good

manne who testeth with a | witchfinder（cf. 102）Good

wheles in the skye, a man | injury??

wheles in the skye， a man | injury？？

certain, together ye sharle |… less than a day

certain， together ye sharle |… less than a day

3819: When Orient’s | Japanese car? Upturned.

3819：When Orien‘s | Japanese car？ Upturned。

“What’s this mean?” he said hoarsely.

“这是什么意思？”他干巴巴地说。

“No,” said Newt, taking a desperate defense in sarcasm. “You’re going to tell me she invented mad people, I suppose.”

“没有。”牛顿换上讽刺的口气，作为最后一道绝望的防线，“你接下来要跟我说是她发明了疯子吧？”

Newt listened in fascinated horror to the story of Agnes Nutter’s death.

牛顿心惊胆战地听她讲了艾格尼丝·风子之死。

“That sort of name was quite common in those days,” said Anathema. “Apparently there were ten children and they were a very religious family. There was Covetousness Pulsifer, False-Witness Pulsifer –“

“这种名字在当时很常见。”安娜丝玛说，“显然他们有十兄弟，在一个信仰虔诚的家庭中。按照摩西十诫来排，应该还有贪恋·帕西法、伪证·帕西法…”

“I think I understand,” said Newt. “Gosh. I thought Shadwell said he’d heard the name before. It must be in the Army records. I suppose if I’d gone around being called Adultery Pulsifer I’d want to hurt as many people as possible.”

“我想我明白了。”牛顿说，“天哪。我记得沙德维尔说他以前听说过这个名字。肯定是在军团档案中。要是老有人叫我奸淫·帕西法，我肯定也特别想去伤害别人。”

“Thanks for taking it so well,” said Newt. “I mean, he must have been an ancestor. There aren’t many Pulsifers. Maybe… that’s why I sort of met up with the Witchfinder Army? Could be Fate,” he said hopefully.

“谢谢你这样安慰我。”牛顿说，“我是说，他肯定是我的祖先之一。姓帕西法的人不多。也许…这就是我遇到猎巫军的原因吗？可能是命运。”他希冀地说。

“Thou-Shalt-Not-Commit-Adultery Pulsifer?” he said, when she’d finished.

“不可奸淫·帕西法？”故事结束后，他问道。

“I think he just didn’t like women very much.”

“我想他只是不太喜欢女人。”

She shook her head. “No,” she said. “No such thing.”

安娜丝玛摇摇头。“不。”她说，“没这回事。”

“Anyway, witchfinding isn’t like it was in those days. I don’t even think old Shadwell’s ever done more than kick over Doris Stokes’s dustbins.”

“总之，猎巫跟过去可不一样了。我估计沙德维尔干过的最龌龊的勾当，也就是踢翻女灵媒桃瑞丝·斯托克斯家的垃圾桶。”

“But what’s it got to do with this?” he said.

“但这到底是做什么用的？”他说。

Newt stared at the prophecy again. His mouth opened and shut.

牛顿看了看手里的预言。他张大了嘴巴，然后又慢慢合上。

“She wrote it. Well, the original. It’s No. 3819 of The Nice and Accurate Prophecies of Agnes Nutter, first published 1655.”

“是她写的。嗯，最初是她写的。这是初版于1655年的《艾格尼丝·风子的精良准确预言书》中第3819条预言。”

Newt waved the bit of paper.

牛顿挥了挥手里的纸片。

“Between you and me, Agnes was a bit of a difficult character,” said Anathema, vaguely. “She had no middle gears.”

“这话我只跟你说，艾格尼丝有点不好相处。”安娜丝玛闪烁其词地说，“她办事总走极端。”

Most psychic abilities are caused by a simple lack of temporal focus, and the mind of Agnes Nutter was so far adrift in Time that she was considered pretty mad even by the standards of seventeenthcentury Lancashire, where mad prophetesses were a growth industry.

大多数精神异能都是由于缺乏时空焦点而产生的。艾格尼丝·风子的精神意识始终在时间长河中漂流，以致被视作不折不扣的疯子，即便以十七世纪兰开夏郡的标准来看也是如此。要知道当时疯狂女预言家正成为本地逐渐增长的新兴产业。

She used to go on about curing illnesses by using a sort of mold, and the importance of washing your hands so that the tiny little animals who caused diseases would be washed away, when every sensible person knew that a good stink was the only defense against the demons of ill health. She advocated running at a sort of gentle bouncing trot as an aid to living longer, which was extremely suspicious and first put the Witchfinders onto her, and stressed the importance of fiber in diet, although here she was clearly ahead of her time since most people were less bothered about the fiber in their diet than the gravel. And she wouldn’t cure warts.

艾格尼丝总说可以用一种青色霉菌治愈疾病，始终坚持洗手的重要性，说是可以洗去致病的微小动物。但所有正常人都知道，良好的臭味是抵御疾病恶魔的唯一屏障。她鼓吹用一种慢慢悠悠蹦蹦跳跳的方式跑步，号称可以延年益寿。这种说法极为可疑，也因此招来了猎巫人的注意。她还着重强调饭菜中纤维食品的重要性，这显然领先于时代。当时大多数人对饭菜中纤维食品的好感，仅仅在沙石之上。而且她还不治疗肉疣。

But she was a treat to listen to, everyone agreed.

但听她说话是一件乐事，这一点所有人都表示赞同。

“She knew I’d crash my car?” he said.

“她知道我会出车祸？”他说。

“Yes. No. Probably not. It’s hard to say. You see, Agnes was the worst prophet that’s ever existed. Because she was always right. That’s why the book never sold.”

“是的。不。也许不知道。这很难讲。你要明白，艾格尼丝是有史以来最糟糕的预言家。因为她从不出错。所以这书根本卖不出去。”

“Itt is alle in youre Minde,” she’d say, “fogett about Itte, ane it wine goe Away.”

“全在你心里。”她这样说，“忘掉它，它就会消失。”

It was obvious that Agnes had a line to the Future, but it was an unusually narrow and specific line. In other words, almost totally useless.

艾格尼丝显然有条通往未来的线路，但却是一条出奇窄小而特别的线路。换句话说，基本没用。

“How do you mean?” said Newt.

“什么意思？”牛顿说。

“You mean she predicted videotape recorders?”

“你是说她预言了录像机？”

“She managed to come up with the kind of predictions that you can only understand after the thing has happened,” said Anathema. “Like ‘Do Notte Buye Betamacks.’ That was a prediction for 1972.”

“她写出的预言，你只有在事发之后才能理解。”安娜丝玛说，“比如‘莫买Betamacks’。这是一条1972年的预言。[3]”【注：[3]索尼公司在1975年推出了Betamax格式录像机，但在80年代初期的市场大战中，输给JVC公司的VHS格式，最终退出市场，而购买了Betamax录像机的用户陷入无片可看的窘境。】

“No! She just picked up one little fragment of information,” said Anathema. “That’s the point. Most of the time she comes up with such an oblique reference that you can’t work it out until it’s gone past, and then it all slots into place. And she didn’t know what was going to be important or not, so it’s all a bit hit and miss. Her prediction for November 22, 1963, was about a house falling down in King’s Lynn.”

“不！她只是接收到一条零散信息。”安娜丝玛说，“这才是重点。多数情况下，她会写出一条含糊其辞的预言，让你永远捉摸不透。直到事情过去后，才会发现她说得严丝合缝。而且她也不知道预见到的东西是否重要，所以多少有些不分轻重缓急。她对1963年10月22日的预言是金斯林镇一所房子倒塌了。”

“President Kennedy was assassinated,” said Anathema helpfully. “But Dallas didn’t exist then, you see. Whereas King’s Lynn was quite important.”

“当天肯尼迪总统遇刺。”安娜丝玛提示说，“但你知道，当年达拉斯还不存在。而金斯林镇则相当重要。”

“Oh?” Newt looked politely blank.

“哦？”牛顿礼貌地一脸茫然。

“She was generally very good if her descendants were involved.”

“如果涉及自己的子孙，她的预言就会特别准确。”

“Oh.”

“哦。”

“Oh?”

“哦？”

“Sometimes you can be lucky,” Anathema went on. “My greatgrandfather worked out about the stock market crash of 1929, for example, two days before it actually happened. Made a fortune. You could say we’re professional descendants.”

“有时你也可能交上好运。”安娜丝玛继续说，“举个例子，我的曾祖父在1929年股市大崩盘的前两天，解开了这条预言，赚了笔钱。你可以说我们是职业后人。”

She looked sharply at Newt. “You see, what no one ever realized until about two hundred years ago that The Nice and Accurate Prophecies was Agnes’s idea of a family heirloom. Many of the prophecies relate to her descendants and their well-being. She was sort of trying to look after us after she’d gone. That’s the reason for the King’s Lynn prophecy, we think. My father was visiting there at the time, so from Agnes’s point of view, while he was unlikely to be struck by stray rounds from Dallas, there was a good chance he might be hit by a brick.”

她紧盯着牛顿。“你看，直到两百年前，才有人发现艾格尼丝写出《精良准确预言书》是为了留下一件传家宝。很多预言都跟她的后人，以及他们的运道有关。她差不多是希望在自己死后也能照顾我们。我们认为，这就是她写出金斯林镇预言的原因。我父亲当时就在那里，因此在艾格尼丝看来，他不可能被达拉斯的圆形物体击中，但很有可能被一块砖头砸到。”

“And she wouldn’t know anything about the internal combustion engine. To her they were just funny chariots. Even my mother thought it referred to an Emperor’s carriage overturning. You see, it’s not enough to know what the future i — You have to know what it means. Agnes was like someone looking at a huge picture down a tiny little tube. She wrote down what seemed like good advice based on what she understood of the tiny little glimpses.

“她不知道任何有关内燃机的知识。对她来说轿车只是样子奇怪的马车。就连我妈妈都以为这条预言指的是一辆皇家马车翻倒。你看，这不足以理解未来的具体情况。你必须知道它说的是什么意思。艾格尼丝就像个用显微镜观察大图片的人。她根据自己管中窥豹得来的些许信息，尽可能写出貌似良好的建议。”

“And when is that going to be?” said Newt.

“那是什么时候？”牛顿说。

“What a nice person,” said Newt. “You could almost overlook her blowing up an entire village.”

“真是个大好人。”牛顿说，“你几乎可以原谅她炸掉了整座村庄。”

Anathema looked meaningfully at the clock.

安娜丝玛意味深长地看了看时钟。

He gave a horrible little laugh that he hoped sounded suave and worldly. After the events so far today, he wasn’t feeling very sane. And he could smell Anathema’s perfume, which made him uncomfortable.

牛顿傻呵呵地轻笑一声，试图显得老于世故。经过今天这些怪事，他感觉不是特别正常。而且安娜丝玛的香水气味也让他不太舒服。

Anathema ignored this. “Anyway, that’s about it,” she said. “Ever since then we’ve made it our job to interpret them. After all, it averages out at about one prophecy a month — more now, in fact, as we get closer to the end of the world.”

安娜丝玛没理他。“总之，就是这样。”她说，“从那以后，我们始终致力于解读这些预言。总体来看，它的平均频率是一个月一条。最近变多了些，因为我们正在走向世界末日。”

“Think yourself lucky I don’t need a stopwatch,” said Anathema. “We’ve got, oh, about five or six hours.”

“算你走运，现在还用不着秒表。”安娜丝玛说，“咱们还有，哦，大概五六个小时。”

Newt turned this over in his mind. Thus far in his life he’d never had the urge to drink alcohol, but something told him there had to be a first time.

牛顿思忖片刻。有生以来，他从未产生喝酒的冲动，但有些东西告诉他凡事都有第一次。

“Do witches keep drink in the house?” he ventured.

“女巫们在家里放酒吗？”他冒险问道。

“Oh, yes.” She smiled the sort of smile Agnes Nutter probably smiled when unpacking the contents of her lingerie drawer. “Green bubbly stuff with strange Things squirming on the congealing surface. You should know that.”

“哦，是的。”安娜丝玛展颜一笑，很像艾格尼丝·风子从内衣抽屉里拿出那些东西时露出的笑容，“绿色冒泡的玩意儿。有些怪东西在凝结的表面上蠕动。你应该见过。”

Newt felt slightly aggrieved. “How did you know they were Tibetan?” he said.

牛顿觉得有点败兴。“你怎么知道他们是西藏人？”他说。

It turned out to be gin. There was ice. Anathema, who had picked up witchcraft as she went along, disapproved of liquor in general but approved of it in her specific case.

绿色冒泡的玩意儿是杜松子。冰块也是有的。安娜丝玛自小学习巫术，总的来说不赞成饮酒，但偶一为之倒也无妨。

“Fine. Got any ice?”

“很好。有冰块吗？”

“Oh, I know about them,” she said, shuffling the papers on the table. “The two of them came out of the front lawn yesterday. The poor things were quite bewildered, so I gave them a cup of tea and then they borrowed a spade and went down again. I don’t think they quite know what they’re supposed to be doing.”

“哦，我认识他们。”安娜丝玛一边说，一边翻找着桌上的报纸，“他们俩昨天从我家前院钻了出来。这些可怜人相当迷茫，所以我请他们喝了杯茶。后来他们借了把铁锹，就又下去了。我不认为他们清楚自己该干什么。”

“Did I tell you about the Tibetan coming out of a hole in the road?” Newt said, relaxing a bit.

“我跟你说过有个西藏人从地洞里钻出来吗？”牛顿略感放松。

“If it comes to that, how did you know? Did he go ‘Ommm’ when you hit him?”

“如此说来，你又是怎么知道的？你撞到他时，他说唵了吗？”

“One of mine spoke quite good English. It seems that one minute he was repairing radios in Lhasa, next minute he was in a tunnel. He doesn’t know how he’s going to get home.”

“我遇到的那两位，其中一个英语说得很好。似乎他上一分钟还在拉萨修收音机，下一分钟就出现在地洞里。他不知道该怎么回家。”

“Well, he — he looked Tibetan,” said Newt. “Saffron robes, bald head… you know… Tibetan.”

“哦，他…他看起来像西藏人。”牛顿说，“藏袍，光头…你知道…西藏人。”

“They landed on your lawn too, did they?”

“它们也降落在你家前院了吗？”

“Three aliens? One of them a little tin robot?”

“三个外星人？其中一个好像小铁罐机器人？”

“If you’d sent him up the road, he could probably have got a lift on a flying saucer,” said Newt gloomily.

“如果你让他到大路上去，也许可以搭一架飞碟的便车。”牛顿灰心丧气地说。

“She did it all in a card index?” said Newt.

“她把预言都写在一个卡片索引盒里了？”牛顿说。

“I kept meaning to put it all on computer,” she said. “Word searches and so forth. You know? It’d make it a lot simpler. The prophecies are arranged in any old order but there are clues, handwriting and so.”

“我一直想把它输入电脑。”她说，“方便单词搜索之类的。你明白吧？会简单很多。这些预言可以用任何顺序排列，但这里有线索、笔迹什么的。”

“You’re going to tell me she predicted all this too, I suppose?”

“你是想告诉我，这些她也都预言到了？”

“No. A book. But I’ve, er, mislaid it. We’ve always had copies, of course.”

“不，一本书。但我，呃，放错地方了。当然，我们保存着副本。”

“It’s about the only place they didn’t land, according to the radio. They keep coming down all over the world delivering a short trite message of cosmic peace, and when people say ‘Yes, well?’ they give them a blank look and take off again. Signs and portents, just like Agnes said.”

“这里可能是它们唯一没降落过的地方了。听收音机里说，它们降落在世界各地，传达那条有关宇宙和平的陈词滥调，如果有人说‘哦，然后呢？’，他们就板起脸飞走了。征兆和预示，正如艾格尼丝所说。”

“Lost it, eh?” said Newt, trying to inject some humor into the proceedings. “Bet she didn’t foresee that!”

“丢了，嗯？”牛顿试图在对话中加入些许幽默，“我打赌她没预言到这件事！”

Agnes leafed through a battered card index in front of her.

安娜丝玛翻了翻面前一个破破烂烂的卡片索引盒。

Four arise, upon iron | 3=4? Railways?

Four arise， upon iron | 3=4？ Railways？

barres quitte the light- | (see cuttings Nos. 798806)

barres quitte the light— |（see cuttings Nos. 798806）

cometh together and |… South America is green??

cometh together and |… South America is green？？

Brazil is vert, then Three |… leviathan=whale (cf.1981)?

Brazil is vert， then Three |… leviathan=whale（cf.1981）？

than runneth free, and

than runneth free， and

ning castels, and sunken

ning castels， and sunken

“I didn’t get all of this one in advance,” Anathema admitted. “I filled it in after listening to the news.”

“我事先没有完全解读出来。”安娜丝玛承认道，“是听了新闻以后填好的。”

She pushed a sheet of paper in front of Newt.

她把一张纸推到牛顿面前。

Then she went on: “We’ve built up quite a concordance over the years, though, and my grandfather came up with a useful cross-referencing system… ah. Here we are.”

她继续说：“但多年以来，我们建立了字母索引表，我祖父还发明了一种有用的交叉索引系统…啊，在这儿呢。”

landes riseth, and Levia- |… Atlantis, cuttings 812819

landes riseth， and Levia— |… Atlantis， cuttings 812819

frome thee Sky, yette ken |… paratroops?

frome thee Sky， yette ken |… paratroops？

“You must be incredibly good at crosswords in your family,” said Newt.

“你肯定是家族中最擅长纵横填字游戏的人。”牛顿说。

Earth and green manne |… Aliens…??

Earth and green manne |… Aliens…？？

not why, and Pluto’s |… nuclear power stations

not why， and Plut‘s |… nuclear power stations

crocus come frome the

crocus come frome the

3988. Whene menne of |… Crocus=saffron (cf.2003)

3988. Whene menne of |… Crocus=saffron（cf.2003）

horses ride; I tell you the | (‘iron road’, cf.2675)

horses ride； I tell you the |‘iron roa’， cf.2675）

ende draweth nigh.

ende draweth nigh。

Anathema glowered at him. If looks could kill, Newt would have been on a slab.

安娜丝玛瞪了他一眼。如果眼神能杀人，牛顿现在已经躺在停尸房里了。

“Three hours and ten minutes,” said Newt automatically.

“三小时零十分钟。”牛顿不由自主地说。

“It wasn’t blazing,” said Pepper. “It wasn’t even very wrecked when we put it back rightside up.”

“它没着火。”佩帕说，“咱们把车翻过来后，它甚至算不上残骸。”

“I think Agnes is getting a bit out of her depth here, anyway. The bits about leviathan and South America and threes and fours could mean anything.” She sighed. “The problem is newspapers. You never know if Agnes is referring to some tiny little incident that you might miss. Do you know how long it takes to go through every daily paper thoroughly every morning?”

“不过，我觉得艾格尼丝也有点力有未逮了。关于海中巨兽、南美和三三四四的部分，可以有无数种解释。”她叹了口气，“问题在于报纸。你永远不知道艾格尼丝提到的东西是不是你漏看了的芝麻小事。你知道每天早晨浏览所有日报需要多长时间吗？”

“I expect we’ll get a medal or something,” said Adam optimistically. “Rescuing a man from a blazing wreck.”

“我认为咱们会得到奖章什么的。”亚当乐观地说，“从着火的汽车残骸里救出一个人啊！”

“Could be good fun, going to Tibet,” said Brian. “We could learn marital arts and stuff. I saw this old film where there’s this valley in Tibet and everyone there lives for hundreds of years. It’s called Shangri-La.”

“应该挺有意思的，直接去西藏。”布赖恩说，“咱们可以学武术。我看过一部老片子，里面有个西藏山谷，那里所有人都活了几百岁。山谷叫香格里拉。”

“It could of been,” Adam pointed out. “I don’t see why we shouldn’t have a medal just because some old car doesn’t know when to catch fire.”

“应该着火的。”亚当指出，“我不明白为什么因为某些老车不知什么时候该着火，咱们就不能得到奖章。”

They stood looking down at the hole. Anathema had called the police, who had put it down to subsidence and put some cones around it; it was dark, and went down a long way.

他们站在洞口，低头向下看去。安娜丝玛已经叫来了警察，他将事故原因认定为路基下降，并在周围放了些交通锥。洞里很黑，而且很深。

Adam snorted.

亚当哼了一声。

“Like what?” said Brian, who enjoyed the diversions available at a good sheep-dipping. He began to empty his pockets of crisp packets and drop them, one by one, into the hole.

“比如说？”布赖恩问道。他很希望接受羊用消毒液以外的选择。他已经吃光了兜里的薯片，正把空包装袋一个个扔进大洞。

Adam threw a larger stone into the hole, and waited for the thump. It didn’t come.

亚当往洞里扔了块更大的石头，等待着那一声闷响。但回声始终没有出现。

“What shall we do now?” said Pepper. “They’re dipping sheep over at Norton Bottom Farm. We could go and help.”

“咱们现在干什么？”佩帕说，“诺顿农场今天要给羊群消毒洗澡。咱们可以去帮忙。”

“Shambala,” corrected Adam.

“香巴拉。”亚当更正道。

“I expect it’s the same place. Prob’ly got both names,” said Pepper, with unusual diplomacy. “Like our house. We changed the name from The Lodge to Norton View when we moved in, but we still get letters addressed to Theo C. Cupier, The Lodge. Perhaps they’ve named it Shambala now but people still call it The Laurels.”

“我估计是同一个地方。可能有两个名字。”佩帕展示出不同寻常的外交手腕，“像我们家的房子。我们搬进去时，就把名字从寄宿屋改成了北景别墅，但我们还是会收到寄给‘寄宿屋西奥·C。丘比尔’的信件。也许他们现在给它起了个名字叫香巴拉，但别人还是称其为桂冠谷。”

“‘S lot better than Shambles, anyway,” said Wensleydale mildly.

“总比香巴斯强多了。”温斯利戴委婉地说。

“Not very clever, naming a valley after some ole bungalow,” he said. “Might as well call it Dunroamin’, or, or The Laurels.”

“这可不太聪明，给山谷起个老平房的名字。”他说，“本可以叫丹罗明谷，或者，或者桂冠谷。”

“Dunno,” he said distantly. “I reckon we should do something about whales and forests and suchlike.”

“不知道。”他心不在焉地说，“我想咱们应该为鲸鱼和雨林什么的做点事。”

“My aunt’s bungalow’s called Shangri-La,” said Wensleydale.

“我婶婶的平房就叫香格里拉。”温斯利戴说。

Adam flicked a pebble into the hole. He was becoming bored with Tibetans.

亚当往洞里扔了块小石子。他已经有点厌倦西藏人了。

“Huh,” said Adam, not really listening.

“嗯。”亚当随口应道，他根本没在留心听。

Something was happening inside his head. It was aching. Thoughts were arriving there without him having to think them. Something was saying, You can do something, Adam Young. You can make it all better. You can do anything you want. And what was saying this to him was… him. Part of him, deep down. Part of him that had been attached to him all these years and not really noticed, like a shadow. It was saying: yes, it’s a rotten world. It could have been great. But now it’s rotten, and it’s time to do something about it. That’s what you’re here for. To make it all better.

亚当脑袋里发生了某些变化。它在疼。各种想法不请自来。不知什么东西在说，你可以做点什么，亚当·扬。你可以让它变得更好。你可以为所欲为。而对他说这些话的正是…他自己。是他的一部分，在内心深处。一个始终连在他身上，却未曾被人发现的部分，就像个影子。它在说：对，这是个腐朽的世界。它本该成就辉煌。但现在却烂透了，应该有所改变。这就是你降生的原因。为了让它变得更好。

He was feeling very odd.

他盯着狗狗，感觉特别奇怪。

“Then the Atlantisans’d be the only ones well off,” said Pepper cheerfully.

“那亚特兰蒂斯人可走运了。”佩帕高兴地说。

“They’ll be cutting ’em down anyway,” said Wensleydale.

“他们无论如何都会砍。”温斯利戴说。

Dog, one last tiny satanic spark of his soul hating himself for it, put his head on one side and whined.

尽管灵魂中最后一丝恶魔火花痛恨这样的行为，但狗狗还是忍不住耷拉下脑袋，发出呜呜叫声。

“We could go into Tadfield this afternoon and not have a hamburger,” said Pepper. “If all four of us don’t have one, that’s millions of acres of rainforest they won’t have to cut down.”

“咱们今天下午可以去塔德菲尔德，但是不吃汉堡。”佩帕说，“咱们四个人都不吃，那么就有数百万亩雨林不会被砍伐了。”

The little mongrel, noticing the attention, balanced expectantly on its hind legs.

小杂种狗发现主人在看自己，期待地立起来。

“S gonna be a fine ole world to grow up in,” Adam said. “No whales, no air, and everyone paddlin’ around because of the seas risin’.”

“还真是个适合成长的好地方啊。”亚当说，“没有鲸鱼，没有空气，因为海面上涨，所有人都得划小船代步。”

“It’s grass materialism again,” said Adam. “Same with the whales. It’s amazin’, the stuff that’s goin’ on.” He stared at Dog.

“又是物质至上主义。”亚当说，“鲸鱼也一样。真怪了，这种事总是没完没了。”

“S people like you that’s eating all the whales,” said Adam severely. “I bet you’ve used up a nearly a whole whale already.”

“就是你这种家伙把鲸鱼都吃光了。”亚当严厉地说，“我打赌你几乎已经吃掉一整条鲸鱼了。”

“Because they’d be able to go everywhere,” Pepper went on, giving him a worried look. “The Atlantisans, I mean. Because –“

“因为他们可以去任何地方。”佩帕担心地看了他一眼，“那些亚特兰蒂斯人，我是说。因为…”

They stared at him. They’d never seen him like this before.

三个孩子盯着他。他们从没见过亚当这个样子。

“I’m fed up with the ole Atlantisans and Tibetans,” snapped Adam.

“我已经受够了什么亚特兰蒂斯人和西藏人。”亚当厉声说。

This wasn’t the old Adam the Them knew. The Them avoided one another’s faces. With Adam in this mood, the world seemed a chillier place.

这不是他们熟悉的亚当。“他们”都别过脸去，避开彼此的目光。亚当情绪如此糟糕的时候，整个世界似乎都变得更加寒冷。

“It’s all very well for them,” said Adam. “Everyone’s goin’ around usin’ up all the whales and coal and oil and ozone and rainforests and that, and there’ll be none left for us. We should be goin’ to Mars and stuff, instead of sittin’ around in the dark and wet with the air spillin’ away.”

“对大人们来说倒是挺好的。”亚当说，“所有人拼命消耗鲸鱼和煤炭和石油和臭氧和雨林和别的东西，根本不给咱们留。咱们就只能去火星之类的地方，不然就只能留在黑暗潮湿，而且空气不断泄漏的地方。”

“It’s like you said the other day,” said Adam. “You grow up readin’ about pirates and cowboys and spacemen and stuff, and jus’ when you think the world’s all full of amazin’ things, they tell you it’s really all dead whales and chopped-down forests and nucular waste hangin’ about for millions of years. ‘Snot worth growin’ up for, if you ask my opinion.”

“就好像你那天说的。”亚当说，“你从小到大读到的都是海盗、牛仔、太空人，你刚觉得世上充满了这些神奇的东西，结果他们告诉你其实只有死鲸鱼和被砍掉的雨林和数百万年都不消解的核废料。要我说的话，这些东西真不值得让人长大。”

“Seems to me,” said Brian, pragmatically, “seems to me, the best thing you could do about it is stop readin’ about it.”

“在我看来，”布赖恩讲求实际地说，“在我看来，最好的办法就是别再读这些东西。”

The Them exchanged glances.

“他们”交换了一个眼神。

“Seems to me it ought to be rolled up and started all over again,” said Adam.

“在我看来，这个世界应该被推倒重来。”亚当说。

There was a shadow over the whole world. Storm clouds were building up in the north, the sunlight glowing yellow off them as though the sky had been painted by an enthusiastic amateur.

阴影笼罩整个世界。暴雨云正在北方积聚，阳光给云朵染上片片黄色，天空仿佛出自某个热情洋溢的业余绘画爱好者之手。

That hadn’t sounded like Adam’s voice.

这听起来不像是亚当的声音。

The thunder growled again. Pepper shivered. This wasn’t the normal Them mobius bickering, which passed many a slow hour. There was a look in Adam’s eye that his friend couldn’t quite fathom — not devilment, because that was more or less there all the time, but a sort of blank grayness that was far worse.

雷鸣再度响起。佩帕打了个哆嗦。这不是“他们”之间常见的可以延续数小时的默比乌斯圈式争吵。此刻亚当眼中有种陌生的神色，他的朋友们很难解读——不是恶魔的神情，因为那差不多算是司空见惯的东西了，此刻出现的东西要糟糕得多，给人一种空洞阴沉的感觉。

A bitter wind blew through the summer woods.

一股悲风吹过夏日树林。

Adam looked at Dog, who tried to stand on his head. There was a distant mutter of thunder. He reached down and patted the dog absentmindedly.

亚当看着狗狗，它正尝试拿大顶。远方传来低沉的雷鸣。他弯下腰，心不在焉地拍了拍狗狗。

“Serve everyone right if all the nucular bombs went off and it all started again, only prop’ly organized,” said Adam. “Sometimes I think that’s what I’d like to happen. An’ then we could sort everythin’ out.”

“如果核弹爆炸一切重来，那才好呢，只是这次要让它好好发展。”亚当说，“有时我觉得自己希望这种事发生，然后咱们就可以让一切走上正轨。”

“But there wouldn’t be any people,” said Pepper.

“但那个世界没别人。”佩帕说。

“Well, I dunno about we,” Pepper tried. “Dunno about the we, because, if there’s all these bombs goin’ off, we all get blown up. Speaking as a mother of unborn generations, I’m against it.”

“哦，我不知道咱们，”佩帕试探着说，“不知道咱们该怎么办。如果那些核弹爆炸的话，咱们也都会被炸飞啊。作为还未出生的下一代人的母亲，我对这件事持反对意见。”

“And then giant ants take over the world,” said Wensleydale nervously. “I saw this film. Or you go around with sawn-off shotguns and everyone’s got these cars with, you know, knives and guns stuck on –“

“然后巨大的蚂蚁就会占领世界。”温斯利戴说，“我看过这部片子。或者你得随身携带锯短了的霰弹枪，而且所有人都开那种，你知道，插着匕首和枪的车…”

They looked at her curiously. She shrugged.

他们好奇地看了她一眼。佩帕耸耸肩。

“I wouldn’t allow any giant ants or anything like that,” said Adam, brightening up horribly. “And you’d all be all right. I’d see to that. It’d be wicked, eh, to have all the world to ourselves. Wouldn’t it? We could share it out. We could have amazing games. We could have War with real armies an’ stuff.”

“我不会让巨型蚂蚁之类的东西出现。”亚当兴奋得令人恐惧，“而且你们都不会有事。我会处理好的。整个世界都属于咱们，酷毙了。不是吗？咱们可以把它分了。咱们可以玩特别棒的游戏。咱们可以用真正的军队打仗。”

“Oh, I could make us some people,” said Adam airily. “Good enough for armies, at any rate. We could all have a quarter of the world each. Like, you’!… he pointed to Pepper, who recoiled as though Adam’s finger were a whitehot poker –“could have Russia because it’s red and you’ve got red hair, right? And Wensley can have America, and Brian can have, can have Africa and Europe, an’, an’–“

“哦，我可以给咱们造点人出来。”亚当快活地说，“至少足够组成军队。咱们可以每人拥有四分之一世界。比如说你！”他指向佩帕，女孩往后一缩，仿佛亚当的手指是红热的拨火棍，“可以拥有俄罗斯，因为它是红的，而你的头发也是红的，对吧？温斯利可以拥有美洲，布赖恩可以有…可以有非洲和欧洲，以及…以及…”

“H-huh,” stuttered Pepper, as the rising wind whipped at her T-shirt, “I don’t s-see why Wensley’s got America an’ all I’ve g-got is just Russia. Russia’s boring.”

“啊…哈。”佩帕结结巴巴地说，此时坚强的冷风正抽打着她的T恤衫，“我不知…知道为什么温斯利有美洲，而…而我只得…得到个俄罗斯。俄罗斯没劲。”

Even in their state of mounting terror the Them gave this the consideration it deserved.

即便他们都心存恐惧，但还是认真思考了一下这个问题。

“That means I’ve got jus’ Africa and a lot of jus’ borin’ little countries,” said Brian, negotiating even on the curl of the catastrophe curve. “I wouldn’t mind Australia,” he added.

“也就是说，我只有非洲和一堆无聊的小国家。”布赖恩说，即便大难临头他也不忘讨价还价，“我倒是不介意澳大利亚。”

“Dog’s goin’ to have Australia,” said Adam, his eyes glowing with the fires of creation, “on account of him needin’ a lot of space to run about. An’ there’s all those rabbits and kangaroos for him to chase, an’–“

“澳大利亚是狗狗的。”亚当的双目中闪烁着造物的火光，“因为它需要奔跑的空间。而且那里有很多兔子和袋鼠可以让它追，而且…”

“You can have China and Japan and India,” said Adam.

“你可以得到中国、日本和印度。”亚当说。

Adam wasn’t listening, at least to any voices outside his own head. “It’s all too much of a mess,” he said. “We should start again. Just save the ones we want and start again. That’s the best way. It’d be doing the Earth a favor, when you come to think about it. It makes me angry, seeing the way those old loonies are messing it up…”

亚当没听见，至少没听见脑袋之外的任何声音。“这里真是一团糟。”他说，“咱们应该从头来过。只要救出咱们需要的人，然后从头来过。这是最好的办法。如果你认真想想，就会发现这帮了地球一个大忙。看看那些老疯子把这里搞成了什么样子，真让我生气…”

Pepper nudged him and shook her head urgently.

佩帕捅了他一下，急切地摇摇头。

The clouds spread forwards and sideways like ink poured into a bowl of clear water, moving across the sky faster than the wind.

云层向四方翻涌，仿佛倒进一碗清水中的墨汁，以比狂风还快的速度覆盖天宇。

“But there won’t be any rab –” Wensleydale shrieked.

“但不会再有兔…”温斯利戴尖声喊道。

“What I’m trying to say,” she said patiently, “is that Agnes didn’t see the future. That’s just a metaphor. She remembered it. Not very well, of course, and by the time it’d been filtered through her own understanding it’s often a bit confused. We think she’s best at remembering things that were going to happen to her descendants.”

“我想说的是，”安娜丝玛耐心地说，“艾格尼丝并没看到未来。这只是一个比喻。她看到的是回忆。当然，看得并不真切，而且这些信息经过她的理解过滤后，总会有些混淆。我们认为她最擅长回忆发生在后代身边的事情。”

“It’s memory, you see,” said Anathema. “It works backwards as well as forwards. Racial memory, I mean.”

“你要知道，其实是记忆。”安娜丝玛说，“它既能向后也能向前。我是说，种族记忆。”

“But if you’re going to places and doing things because of what she wrote, and what she wrote is her recollection of the places you went to and the things you did,” said Newt, “then –“

“但如果你去某个地方、做某些事情是因为她这么写过，而她写的东西又是对你去过的地方、做过的事情的回忆。”牛顿说，“那么…”

“I know. But there’s, er, some evidence that that’s how it works,” said Anathema.

“我知道这是个悖论。但是，呃，有些证据表明事实就是这样。”安娜丝玛说。

Newt gave her a polite but blank look.

牛顿又搬出那副礼貌的空洞表情。

They looked at the map spread out between them. Beside them the radio murmured. Newt was very aware that a woman was sitting next to him. Be professional, he told himself. You’re a soldier, aren’t you? Well, practically. Then act like a soldier. He thought hard for a fraction of a second. Well, act like a respectable soldier on his best behavior, then. He forced his attention back to the matter at hand.

他们看着摊在中间的地图。旁边的收音机里有人唠唠叨叨说着什么。牛顿清醒地意识到，一个女人正坐在自己身边。冷静点，他对自己说。你是一名士兵，不是吗？好吧，几乎算是。那就假装是一名士兵。他使劲想了几微秒。好吧，那就假装是一名受人尊敬的士兵正表现出最得体的风度。他强迫自己把注意力转移到手头的麻烦上来。

“Why Lower Tadfield?” said Newt. “I just got interested because of the weather. Optimal microclimate, they call it. That means it’s a small place with its own personal nice weather.”

“为什么是下塔德菲尔德？”牛顿说，“我仅仅注意到这里的古怪气候。理想的小气候区，那些人是这么说的。意思是这个小地方拥有独一无二的好天气。”

He glanced at her notebooks. There was definitely something odd about the place, even if you ignored Tibetans and UFOs, which seemed to be infesting the whole world these days. The Tadfield area didn’t only have the kind of weather you could set your calendar by, it was also remarkably resistant to change. No one seemed to build new houses there. The population didn’t seem to move much. There seemed to be more woods and hedges than you’d normally expect these days. The only battery farm to open in the area had failed after a year or two, and been replaced by an old-fashioned pig farmer who let his pigs run loose in his apple orchards and sold the pork at premium prices. The two local schools seemed to soldier on in blissful immunity from the changing fashions of education. A motorway which should have turned most of Lower Tadfield into little more than the Junction 18 Happy Porker Rest Area changed course five miles away, detoured in a great semicircle, and continued on its way oblivious to the little island of rural changelessness it had avoided. No one quite seemed to know why; one of the surveyors involved had a nervous breakdown, a second had become a monk, and a third had gone off to Bali to paint nude women.

他瞅了一眼安娜丝玛的笔记本。这地方肯定有点不对劲，就算刨去如今似乎已经在全球范围肆虐的UFO和西藏人也一样。塔德菲尔德不仅拥有可以校准时令节气的标准气候，还有极强的抗变化力。唯一一所小笼圈养式农庄没两年就垮了台，被一所老式养猪场所取代，这个农场主让他的猪在苹果园里自由奔跑，并加价出售猪肉。本地的两所学校也十分固执，似乎对教育方式变革有极强免疫力。一条本可以将下塔德菲尔德变成“18号岔路口—快乐小猪休息站”的高速公路，在五里外拐了弯，绕过巨大的半圆然后继续前进，完全没有影响到这个永不改变的乡村孤岛。谁也不知道个中缘由。第一名调查员精神崩溃了，第二名做了修士，第三名跑去巴厘岛画裸女。

It was as if a large part of the twentieth century had marked a few square miles Out of Bounds.

似乎二十世纪的大部分光阴，都将方圆几英里的土地视为不可逾越的禁区。

2315. Sum say It cometh |…4 years early [New

2315. Sum say It cometh |…4 years early [New

Hound sharl coom, | Bismark?

Hound sharl coom， | Bismark？

Wronge, for the plase is |… Tardesfield, Devon…

Wronge， for the plase is |… Tardesfield， Devon…

Yorke, butte they be |… Taddville, Norfolk…

Yorke， butte they be |… Taddville， Norfolk…

Taddes Fild, Stronge inne |… Tadfield, Oxon…

Taddes Fild， Stronge inne |… Tadfield， Oxon…

a knight inne the fief, he

a knight inne the fief， he

“I had to go and look through a lot of county records,” said Anathema

“我不得不查看了许多郡县地方志。”安娜丝玛说。

4 partes, he bringeth the

4 partes， he bringeth the

“Why’s this one 2315? It’s earlier than the others.”

“这条为什么是2315？比其他的要早。”

divideth the Worlde into

divideth the Worlde into

Anathema pulled another card out of her index and flicked it across the table.

安娜丝玛又从索引盒里抽出一张卡片，从桌上弹过来。

storme.

storme。

hys powr, he cometh like | –!– See Revelation, C6, v10

hys powr， he cometh like |——！—— See Revelation， C6， v10

1111. An the Great. Is this something to do with

1111. An the Great. Is this something to do with

in London Town, or New | Amsterdam till 1664]…

in London Town， or New | Amsterdam till 1664]…

and the Two Powers sharl | [A F Device, June 8, 1888]

and the Two Powers sharl | [A F Device， June 8， 1888]

“Agnes was a bit slapdash about timing. I don’t think she always knew what went where. I told you, we’ve spent ages devising a sort of system for chaining them together.”

“艾格尼丝对时间顺序的处理有些草率。我想她不是很清楚哪条应该在哪儿。我告诉过你，为了把它们联系在一起，我们花了很长时间设计出一个系统。”

Newt looked at a few cards. For example:

牛顿看了几张卡片。比如：

Manne sharl claim his | I concur. We are all human, alas.

Manne sharl claim his | I concur. We are all human， alas。

with them, And Three | Brewster, 1782).??

with them， And Three | Brewster， 1782）。？？

it, True to Ittes Nature,

it， True to Ittes Nature，

Own Defeat, Yette the | [Quincy Device, Octbr. 15, 1789]

Own Defeat， Yette the | [Quincy Device， Octbr. 15， 1789]

“She’s being unusually obtuse for Agnes,” said Anathema.

“这位特别不擅长领会艾格尼丝的意思。”安娜丝玛说。

Own. | [Miss O J Device, Janry. 5, 1854]

Own。 | [Miss O J Device， Janry. 5， 1854]

Goeth where is its Mas…?

Goeth where is its Mas…？

sharl Rise. And Four and

sharl Rise. And Four and

— he’d nearly convinced himself about the non-existence of the UFO, which was clearly a figment of his imagination, and the Tibetan could have been a, well, he was working on it, but whatever it was it wasn’t a Tibetan, but what he was more and more convinced of was that he was in a room with a very attractive woman, who appeared actually to like him, or at least not to dislike him, which was a definite first for Newt. And admittedly there seemed to be a lot of strange stuff going on, but if he really tried, poling the boat of common sense upstream against the raging current of the evidence, he could pretend it was all, well, weather balloons, or Venus, or mass hallucination.

他几乎已经说服自己UFO是不存在的，那只是他的臆想。西藏人可能是…好吧，他还在考虑，总之无论是什么，肯定不是西藏人。但他越来越坚信自己正跟一位特别有魅力的女孩共处一室，而且她显然喜欢他，至少不讨厌他。这绝对是牛顿今生今世头一遭。的确有很多怪事正在发生，但如果他努力驾驶常识之舟，顺着波涛汹涌的证据之河逆流而上，也许能假装这些只是…嗯，气象气球，或者金星，或者集体幻觉。

bringing the Ende, and | the Man = Pan, The Devil

bringing the Ende， and | the Man = Pan， The Devil

3017. I see Four Riding, | The Apocalyptic Horsemen.

3017. I see Four Riding， | The Apocalyptic Horsemen。

the Angells of Hell ride | The Witch Trials of Lancashire,

the Angells of Hell ride | The Witch Trials of Lancashire，

Four Together be Four, | I feel good Agnes had drunk

Four Together be Four， | I feel good Agnes had drunk

“Nice as in exact, or precise,” said Anathema, in the weary tones of one who’d explained this before. “That’s what it used to mean.”

“精良也表示精确、准确。”安娜丝玛不胜其烦地说，仿佛这个问题已经解释过太多次了，“它过去就是这个意思。”

an the Dark Angel sharl | well this night,

an the Dark Angel sharl | well this night，

ter, Where they Wot

ter， Where they Wot

watch in Vane, for it

watch in Vane， for it

and Hell sharl flee it.

and Hell sharl flee it。

“Why Nice and Accurate?” said Newt.

“为什么叫精良准确？”牛顿说。

“But look,” said Newt.

“但你看，”牛顿说…

Notte, and he sharl name | Schleswig-Holstein?

Notte， and he sharl name | Schleswig-Holstein？

“But look,” he said, “the world isn’t really going to end now, is it? I mean, just look around. It’s not like there’s any international tension… well, any more than there normally is. Why don’t we leave this stuff for a while and just go and, oh, I don’t know, maybe we could just go for a walk or something, I mean –“

“但你看，”他说，“世界不可能真的就此结束，对吧？我是说，好好想想。现在又没什么国际紧张局势…好吧，除了平常就有的以外。咱们干吗不暂时忘掉这个问题，去…哦，我不知道，也许咱们可以出去走走什么的。我是说…”

In short, whatever Newt was now thinking with, it wasn’t his brain.

总而言之，此刻牛顿用来思考的东西，显然不是他的大脑。

“Don’t you understand? There’s something here! Something that affects the area!” she said. “It’s twisted all the ley-lines. It’s protecting the area against anything that might change it! It’s… it’s…” There it was again: the thought in her mind that she could not, was not allowed to grasp, like a dream upon waking.

“你不明白吗？这里有某种东西！某种影响这个地区的东西！”安娜丝玛说，“它扭曲了所有魔力射线。它保护这里免受任何变革影响！它是…它是…”又来了，她无法——或者说被禁止捕捉脑海中的那个想法，这就像一场白日梦。

The windows rattled. Outside, a sprig of jasmine, driven by the wind, started to bang insistently on the glass.

窗户哐哐作响。屋外有一枝茉莉，在冷风的吹拂下，开始不住敲打玻璃。

“Fix?” said Newt.

“找？”牛顿说。

“But I can’t get a fix on it,” said Anathema, twisting her fingers together. “I’ve tried everything.”

“但我就是找不出来。”安娜丝玛扭着手指说，“我什么都试过了。”

“I’ve tried the pendulum. I’ve tried the theodolite. I’m psychic, you see. But it seems to move around.”

“我试过钟摆，试过经纬仪。你看，我是个灵媒。但它似乎在移动。”

“Various prophecies say the Antichrist has to arise first,” said Anathema. “Agnes says he. I can’t spot him –“

“很多预言都说到敌基督将首先登场。”安娜丝玛说，“艾格尼丝说是他。我找不到他…”

Newt was still in control of his own mind enough to do the proper translation. When most people said “I’m psychic, you see,” they meant “I have an over-active but unoriginal imagination/wear black nail varnish/talk to my budgie”; when Anathema said it, it sounded as though she was admitting to a hereditary disease which she’d much prefer not to have.

牛顿尚能控制自己的意识进行恰如其分的翻译。当大多数人说“你看，我是个灵媒”时，他们想说的是“我想象力过分活跃但没什么独创性/涂黑色指甲油/跟我的相思鹦鹉聊天”。而安娜丝玛说这话时，感觉像是在承认她患有一种自己不太喜欢的遗传病。

“Armageddon moves around?” said Newt.

“世界末日大决战在移动？”牛顿说。

“Or her,” said Newt.

“或者她。”牛顿说。

“Could be a her,” said Newt. “This is the twentieth century, after all. Equal opportunities.”

“可能是女性。”牛顿说，“现在是二十世纪。男女平等。”

“I don’t think you’re taking this entirely seriously,” she said severely. “Anyway, there isn’t any evil here. That’s what I don’t understand. There’s just love.”

“我想你根本没把这件事当真。”安娜丝玛厉声说道，“总之，这里完全没有邪恶的影踪。这就是我搞不明白的地方。这里只有爱。”

She gave him a helpless look. “It’s hard to describe it,” she said. “Something or someone loves this place. Loves every inch of it so powerfully that it shields and protects it. A deep-down, huge, fierce love. How can anything bad start here? How can the end of the world start in a place like this? This is the kind of town you’d want to raise your kids in. It’s a kids’ paradise.” She smiled weakly. “You should see the local kids. They’re unreal! Right out of the Boys’ Own Paper! All scabby knees and ‘brilliant!’ and bulls-eyes –“

安娜丝玛无可奈何地看了他一眼。“很难形容。”她说，“某个东西或者某个人热爱这里。爱它的每一寸土地，强大到足以将它屏蔽保护起来。一种深刻、巨大、强烈的爱。这儿怎么可能发生任何坏事？世界末日怎么可能会从这种地方开始？这是个安宁祥和的小镇，所有父母都会希望自己的孩子在这儿长大。塔德菲尔德是孩子们的天堂。”她疲倦地笑了笑，“你应该看看本地的孩子们。他们不真实！简直像是从《男孩故事报》里蹦出来的！膝盖上都是疤瘌，满嘴‘帅呆了！’，又大又黑的眼睛…”

“What?”

“什么？”

“Sorry?” said Newt.

“你说什么？”牛顿说。

Anathema snorted. “Disused? Don’t you believe it. Used to be a wartime fighter base. It’s been Upper Tadfield Air Base for about ten years or so. And before you say it, the answer’s no. I hate everything about the bloody place, but the colonel’s saner than you are by a long way. His wife does yoga, for God’s sake.”

安娜丝玛哼了一声。“废弃？你别听它胡扯。那儿当年是一处战时机场。在十几年间，一直被称作上塔德菲尔德空军基地。我提前说好，省得你瞎问，答案是不。我恨那鬼地方的一切，但那个上校比你还正常得多。他妻子还练瑜伽呢，看在上帝分儿上。那儿地方没问题。”

“‘Disused aerodrome’, it says. Just here, look, west of Tadfield itself –“

“它写了‘废弃机场’。就在这儿，你看，塔德菲尔德往西…”

New ones.

新的雨林。

Now. What was it she’d said before? The kids round here…

好了。她刚才想说什么来着？附近的孩子们…

“What’s this place?” said Newt.

“这儿是什么地方？”牛顿说。

She nearly had it. She could feel the shape of the thought, she was gaining on it.

她几乎想出来了。她可以触摸到那个念头的轮廓，她就快想起来了。

“What?” Anathema screamed, as her train of thought was derailed.

“什么？”安娜丝玛的思路被被拦腰斩断了，她厉声叫道。

Newt’s finger tapped at the map.

牛顿用手指敲了敲地图。

She felt her mental feet slipping away from under her, and she fell back into the more personal thought waiting there to catch her. Newt was okay, really. And the thing about spending the rest of your life with him was, he wouldn’t be around long enough to get on your nerves.

安娜丝玛感觉自己的思路开始乱跑。她又开始考虑那个一直等她考虑的私人问题。牛顿还行，真的。跟他共度余生还有一个好处，他待不了多久，不至于让你神经紧张。

The radio was talking about South American rainforests.

收音机里正在说南美雨林。

It began to hail.

它开始猛长。

Bullets of ice shredded the leaves around the Them as Adam led them down into the quarry.

亚当带领他们走进采掘场，冰雹子弹撕碎了周围的叶片。

This wasn’t right, he was thinking. Just when I was getting the hang of rats. Just when I’d nearly sorted out that bloody German Shepherd across the road. Now He’s going to end it all and I’ll be back with the ole glowin’ eyes and chasin’ lost souls. What’s the sense in that? They don’t fight back, and there’s no taste to ’em…

这不对头，他在想。我刚掌握了对付老鼠的窍门，而且几乎就要搞定马路对面那条该死的德国牧羊犬了。现在他要把一切结束，我又会变回那个眼睛冒火的老家伙，去追逐失落的灵魂。这算怎么回事？它们根本不反抗，而且一点味儿都没有…

Wensleydale, Brian, and Pepper were not thinking quite so coherently. All that they were aware of was that they could no more not follow Adam than fly; to try to resist the force marching them forward would simply result in multiply-broken legs, and they’d still have to march.

温斯利戴、布赖恩和佩帕的思绪不太连贯。他们只是意识到自己跟着亚当拼命往前走，简直快飞起来了。试图反抗迫使他们前进的力量，只会造成多处腿骨骨折，而且仍要继续前进。

Dog slunk along with his tail between his legs, whining.

狗狗夹着尾巴跟在旁边，发出呜呜哀鸣。

He sat them down on the crate.

他让大家坐在牛奶箱上。

Adam wasn’t thinking at all. Something had opened in his mind and was aflame.

亚当什么都没想。有些东西在他脑海中敞开，燃起熊熊烈焰。

“Don’t you worry about them,” said Adam loftily. “I can make some new ones. There won’t be any of this being in bed by half past nine, either. You don’t ever have to go to bed ever, if you don’t want to. Or tidy your room or anything. You just leave it all to me and it will be great.” He gave them a manic smile. “I’ve got some new friends comin’,” he confided. “You’ll like ’em.”

“你不用替他们操心。”亚当高高在上地说，“我会造些新的出来。而且再也不会有九点半必须上床之类的规定。只要你不想睡，就再也不用上床睡觉，或是整理房间什么的。你们就看我的吧，一切都会十全十美。”他冲朋友们露出疯狂的笑容，“我有几个新朋友正在赶来。”他信心十足地说，“你们会喜欢他们的。”

“Er,” said Wensleydale, “don’t you think our mothers and fathers –“

“呃。”温斯利戴说，“你没想过咱们的爸爸妈妈吗…”

“We’ll all be all right down here,” he said.

“咱们在这儿就没事了。”他说。

“But before all that,” said Adam darkly, “We’re really goin’ to show ’em…”

“但在此之前，”亚当阴沉沉地说，“咱们一定要给他们看看…”

“You jus’ think of all the amazin’ stuff afterwards,” said Adam enthusiastically. “You can fill up America with all new cowboys an’ Indians an’ policemen an’ gangsters an’ cartoons an’ spacemen and stuff. Won’t that be fantastic?”

“你们就想想以后那些好玩的东西吧。”亚当狂热地说，“你可以在美洲塞满新的牛仔、印第安人、警察、强盗，还有卡通人物和太空人什么的。这不是妙极了吗？”

Wensleydale looked miserably at the other two. They were sharing a thought that none of them would be able to articulate very satisfactorily even in normal times. Broadly, it was that there had once been real cowboys and gangsters, and that was great. And there would always be pretend cowboys and gangsters, and that was also great. But real pretend cowboys and gangsters, that were alive and not alive could be put back in their box when you were tired of them — this did not seem great at all. The whole point about gangsters and cowboys and aliens and pirates was that you could stop being them and go home.

温斯利戴可怜兮兮地看着另两个人。他们都有相同的想法，但就算在正常状态下也很难把这想法完整清晰地表达出来。大体上讲，世上曾有真实的牛仔和强盗，这很棒。而且永远都有假装的牛仔和强盗，这也很棒。但真实的假牛仔和强盗，既是活的又不是活的，如果你玩腻了还可以放回盒子——这一点也不棒。匪徒和牛仔和外星人和海盗的重点就在于，你可以随时不当他们，回家吃饭去。

There was a tree in the plaza. It wasn’t very big and the leaves were yellow and the light it got through the excitingly dramatic smoked glass was the wrong sort of light. And it was on more drugs than an Olympic athlete, and loudspeakers nested in the branches. But it was a tree, and if you half-closed your eyes and looked at it over the artificial waterfall, you could almost believe that you were looking at a sick tree through a fog of tears.

购物中心里有棵树。枝干不高，叶片发黄。通过绚丽华美的烟色玻璃照射进来的阳光也不是正经阳光。它嗑的药比奥运选手都多，枝条上还放了个扩音器。但它是一棵树，如果你眯起眼睛通过人造瀑布看过去，几乎可以相信自己正透过泪水的薄雾，注视着一棵病怏怏的大树。

“But –” Wensleydale began.

“但…”温斯利戴开口说。

But what could you do? Where there were trees now there were big farms, where there were small farms now there were plazas, and where there were plazas there were still plazas, and that’s how it went.

但你还能怎么办呢？过去有树林的地方，现在成了大农场；过去是小农场的地方，如今成了购物中心；而过去是购物中心的地方，现在还是购物中心。这就是趋势。

Jaime Hernez liked to have his lunch under it. The maintenance supervisor would shout at him if he found out, but Jaime had grown up on a farm and it had been quite a good farm and he had liked trees and he didn’t want to have to come into the city, but what could you do? It wasn’t a bad job and the money was the kind of money his father hadn’t dreamed of. His grandfather hadn’t dreamed of any money at all. He hadn’t even known what money was until he was fifteen. But there were times when you needed trees, and the shame of it, Jaime thought, was that his children were growing up thinking of trees as firewood and his grandchildren would think of trees as history.

詹姆·赫内茨喜欢在树下吃午餐。维修主管如果看到，肯定会冲他嚷嚷。但詹姆是在农场长大的，那是个很不错的农场，他喜欢树木，也不愿搬进城市。但你还能怎么办呢？这工作不坏，挣到的钱他爸爸做梦都想不到，而他祖父根本就没梦到过钱。詹姆十五岁前也不知道什么是钱。但有时候，你需要树。可恨的是，詹姆心想，他的孩子们长大后会以为树就是柴火，而他的孩子的孩子们会把树当成历史。

He hid his trolley behind the newspaper stand, sat down furtively, and opened his lunchbox.

詹姆把手推车藏到售报亭后面，偷偷坐在树下，打开午餐盒。

It was then that he became aware of the rustling, and a movement of shadows across the floor. He looked around.

他突然听到一阵沙沙声，接着一片影子从地上闪过。他回头看去。

The tree was moving. He watched it with interest. Jaime had never seen a tree growing before.

这棵树在动。詹姆兴致勃勃地看着，他从没见过一棵树的生长。

The soil, which was nothing more than a scree of some sort of artificial drippings, was actually crawling as the roots moved around under the surface. Jaime saw a thin white shoot creep down the side of the raised garden area and prod blindly at the concrete of the floor.

树下的泥土不过是某种人造颗粒，但这些颗粒正随着下面的树根在移动。詹姆看到一枝纤细的白芽从花园区的高台边上爬下来，盲目探索着水泥地板。

Without knowing why, without ever knowing why, he nudged it gently with his foot until it was close to the crack between the slabs. It found it, and bored down.

詹姆不知道自己为什么要这样做，永远也不知道。他只是不由自主地将嫩芽推向地板间的裂缝。它找到缝隙，扎了下去。

The branches were twisting into different shapes.

树枝扭成各种形状。

Jaime heard the screech of traffic outside the building, but didn’t pay it any attention. Someone was yelling something, but someone was always yelling in Jaime’s vicinity, often at him.

詹姆听到楼外传来一阵阵急刹车声，但他没在意。有人在喊些什么，但总有人在詹姆附近喊叫，而且经常是冲他喊。

Now he could see what was happening outside. The street surface was heaving like a sea. Saplings were pushing up between the cracks.

他终于看到了外面的情况。街道表面如海水起伏不定。树苗从缝隙间挤向空中。

The questing root must have found the buried soil. It changed color and thickened, like a fire hose when the water is turned on. The artificial waterfall stopped running; Jaime visualised fractured pipes blocked with sucking fibers.

探寻的根须肯定是找到了下方的泥土。它颜色变深，直径变粗，像是通了高压水流的消防龙头。人造瀑布断流了。詹姆想象着断裂的管道正被吸水的根须堵塞。

You could do this:

你可以这样办：

But what could you do?

但你还能怎么办呢？

The elevators had stopped running because the power was off, but it was only four flights of stairs. Jaime carefully shut his lunchbox and padded back to his cart, where he selected his longest broom.

由于停电，电梯已经停止运行，但不过是四层楼而已。詹姆小心盖上午餐盒，跑到自己的手推车旁，拿出最长的扫帚。

Of course, he reasoned; they had sunlight. His tree didn’t. All it had was the muted gray light that came through the dome four stories up. Dead light.

当然了，他推想着。它们拥有阳光，他的树可没有。它有的只是从四层高的圆顶照射下来的朦胧灰光。死掉的光。

People were pouring out of the building, yelling. Jaime moved amiably against the flow like a salmon going upstream.

人们尖叫着往楼外挤。詹姆像逆流而上的大马哈鱼一样游刃有余地穿行其间。

A white framework of girders, which the architect had presumably thought made a dynamic statement about something or other, held up the smoked glass dome. In fact it was some sort of plastic, and it took Jaime, perched on a convenient strip of girder, all his strength and the full leverage of the broom’s length to crack it. A couple more swings brought it down in lethal shards.

一些白色框架支撑着烟玻璃穹顶，建筑师大概想营造出某种东西的动态意境。实际上穹顶是由一种塑料制成，詹姆站在一根合适的横梁上，用尽全身力量和扫帚的全部长度，向它砸去。只消挥动几次，它就变成了一堆危险的碎片。

The light poured in, lighting up the dust in the plaza so that the air looked as though it was full of fireflies.

光线倾泻进来，照亮购物中心内弥漫的灰尘，空中仿佛充满萤火虫。

Far below, the tree burst the walls of its brushed concrete prison and rose like an express train. Jaime had never realized that trees made a sound when they grew, and no one else had realized it either, because the sound is made over hundreds of years in waves twenty-four hours from peak to peak.

在最下方，那棵树撑破了四周的水泥监牢，像特快列车似的直往上冲。詹姆从前一点也不知道树木生长时会发出声音，所有人都没注意过，因为这种声音要用数百年的时间发出，波长周期有二十四小时。

The Kappamaki, a whaling research ship, was currently researching the question: How many whales can you catch in one week?

黄瓜卷寿司号捕鲸科考船正在进行一项科学考察任务，课题为：你一周内能捕到多少鲸鱼？

Speed it up, and the sound a tree makes is vroooom.

把它加速后，你就会听到“嗡”的一声。

It was the same over all the city, except that you couldn’t see the city any more. All you could see was the canopy of green. It stretched from horizon to horizon.

全城各处都是这样，只是你再也看不到这座城市。举目远眺，你看到的只有绿色天篷。

Jaime watched it come toward him like a green mushroom cloud. Steam was billowing out from around its roots.

詹姆看到它向自己靠近，宛如一团绿蘑菇云。根须周围喷射着水花。

Jaime sat on his branch, clung to a liana, and laughed and laughed and laughed.

詹姆坐在他的树枝上，揪着一根藤蔓，笑啊笑啊笑啊。

The girders never stood a chance. The remnant of the dome went up like a ping-pong ball on a water spray.

这些支架根本无力抵抗。剩下的穹顶像被喷泉冲起的乒乓球一样升上天空。

Except that, today, there weren’t any whales. The crew stared at the screens, which by the application of ingenious technology could spot anything larger than a sardine and calculate its net value on the international oil market, and found them blank. The occasional fish that did show up was barreling through the water as if in a great hurry to get elsewhere.

可是今天一条鲸鱼都见不到。船员们盯着显示屏，这些先进的科学设备可以捕捉到任何比沙丁鱼大的东西，同时计算出它在国际鲸油市场上的净值。但现在屏幕上什么都没有。偶尔出现的小鱼都行色匆匆，好像特别着急赶往别的地方。

Presently, it began to rain.

此时，天空开始落雨。

“What of it?”

“那又怎样？”

“Ah, sir,” he said, “it is shallower already.”

“啊，先生。”他说，“它已经变浅了。”

The captain glared at several million yen worth of cutting-edge technology, and thumped it.

船长瞪着价值数百万日元的尖端科技产品，重重捶了一拳。

The captain drummed his fingers on the console. He was afraid that he might soon be conducting his own research project to find out what happened to a statistically small sample of whaler captains who came back without a factory ship full of research material. He wondered what they did to you. Maybe they locked you in a room with a harpoon gun and expected you to do the honorable thing.

船长在控制台上敲打着手指。他担心自己很快就要开始一项私人研究：没有带回整船研究材料的捕鲸船船长，作为一种数量稀少的科学样本，会有什么下场。他猜测着他们会做些什么。也许他们会把你和一柄鱼叉锁在小房间里，希望你作出荣誉的选择。

“What is it?” said the captain testily.

“怎么了？”船长暴躁地说。

This was unreal. There ought to be something.

这不正常。应该有什么东西才对。

“We seem to have a miserable instrument failure. Seabed in this area should be two hundred meters.”

“咱们的仪器似乎出现了严重故障。这个区域的海床应该是二百米深。”

“Honorable sir?” he said.

“尊敬的阁下？”他说。

The navigator gave a nervous smile.

导航员露出紧张的微笑。

“I’m reading 15,000 meters, honorable sir. And still falling.”

“我读到了一万五千米，尊敬的先生。而且还在下降。”

“That is foolish. There is no such depth.”

“别傻了。根本没有这么深。”

The navigator punched up a chart and stared at it.

导航员调出一张图表，呆呆地看了一会儿。

Beneath the thunders of the upper deep, as Aziraphale and Tennyson both knew, Far, far beneath in the abyssal sea/The kraken sleepeth.

亚茨拉菲尔和丁尼生都知道，在上层深渊的雷霆中，远在深海之下，沉睡着海中巨妖。

“See,” said the navigator. “‘Three thousand meters already.”

“看。”导航员说，“只有三千米了。”

“A hundred meters?”

“一百米？”

Newt and Anathema clung to one another in the space between the overturned table and the wall.

牛顿跟安娜丝玛紧紧抱在一起，站在翻倒的桌子和墙壁之间。

“Er,” said the navigator, “one thousand meters?”

“呃。”导航员说，“一千米？”

The kraken is not amused.

巨妖不太高兴。

The cottage windows burst inward. This wasn’t a storm, it was war. Fragments of jasmine whirled across the room, mingled with the rain of file cards.

小屋的窗户向内迸裂。这不是风暴，这是战争。茉莉碎片在屋内打着旋儿，和卡片之雨混在一处。

The factory ship rocks on the sudden swell.

捕鲸船在突然涌起的海水上摇摆。

And ten billion sushi dinners cry out for vengeance.

千百万份寿司晚餐高喊着复仇的呼声。

“This is a bloody hurricane. Did she say what’s supposed to happen next?”

“这是场该死的飓风。她说过接下来会发生什么吗？”

“Five hundred meters?”

“五百米？”

Millions of tons of deep ocean ooze cascade off its flanks as it rises.

它挺起身躯，数百万吨深海淤泥从体侧倾泻而落。

“Go on,” muttered Newt. “Tell me Agnes predicted this.”

“来吧。”牛顿喃喃说道，“告诉我艾格尼丝也预言到了现在的情况。”

There is a tiny metal thing above it. The kraken stirs.

那上面有个金属小玩意儿。巨怪扭了扭身子。

“She did say he bringeth the storm,” said Anathema.

“她的确说过它会带来暴风雨。”安娜丝玛说。

The kraken doesn’t have eyes. There has never been anything for it to look at. But as it billows up through the icy waters it picks up the microwave noise of the sea, the sorrowing beeps and whistles of the whalesong.

海中巨妖没有眼睛，深渊里本也没东西可看。但当它翻江倒海穿过冰冷水体时，接收到了海中的微波噪音、哀伤的哔哔声和鲸鱼的歌声。

And now it was waking up.

现在它正徐徐醒转。

Courting is always difficult when the one being courted has an elderly female relative in the house; they tend to mutter or cackle or bum cigarettes or, in the worst cases, get out the family photograph album, an act of aggression in the sex war which ought to be banned by a Geneva Convention. It’s much worse when the relative has been dead for three hundred years. Newt had indeed been harboring certain thoughts about Anathema; not just harboring them, in fact, but dry-docking them, refitting them, giving them a good coat of paint and scraping the barnacles off their bottom. But the idea of Agnes’s second-sight boring into the back of his neck sloshed over his libido like a bucketful of cold water.

当女性长辈在屋里作陪时，献殷勤会变得相当困难。她们总喜欢喃喃自语，或是叽叽喳喳，或是要香烟抽。最可怕的一招，当数拿出家庭相册——性别大战中这一侵略行为，已经在某次日内瓦大会上被明令禁止。如果这位长辈已经死了三百多年，那感觉更是雪上加霜。某些跟安娜丝玛有关的想法确实在牛顿心中靠了港，不仅是靠港，而且还被拖上岸，整修一新，刷上亮丽的油漆，同时刮去底部的藤壶。但一想到艾格尼丝的预见能力，牛顿就觉得一桶凉水从脖子根儿冲下来，浇灭了他的欲念之火。

3477. Lette the wheel of. Some mysticism here, one fears.

3477. Lette the wheel of. Some mysticism here， one fears。

join, there are othere

join， there are othere

wynd blowethe the blos

wynd blowethe the blos

Newt read it again. There was a sound outside like a sheet of corrugated iron pinwheeling across the garden, which was exactly what it was.

牛顿又读了一遍。窗外传来一阵巨响，仿佛一块波状钢板翻着跟头飞过花园，事实正是这样。

“Since you mention it, yes,” she said. She held out a card.

“既然你问起，是的，没错。”她说着掏出一张卡片。

cometh when Redde and | Peas/blossoms? [OFD, 1929, Sept 4]

cometh when Redde and | Peas/blossoms？ [OFD， 1929， Sept 4]

“You can remember details like that at a time like this?”

“这种时候，你还能记得这些细节？”

anothere, for the calm

anothere， for the calm

“2315 is cross-referenced to 3477,” said Anathema.

“2315交叉索引到3477。”安娜丝玛说。

fyres than mine; when the

fyres than mine； when the

Pale approche to Peas is | Revelations Ch 6 again, I presume.

Pale approche to Peas is | Revelations Ch 6 again， I presume。

Whyte and Blacke and

Whyte and Blacke and

Fate turne, let harts en- | [A F Device, Octbr 17, 1889]

Fate turne， let harts en— | [A F Device， Octbr 17， 1889]

Our Professioune. | [Dr Thos. Device, 1835]

Our Professioune。 | [Dr Thos. Device， 1835]

soms, reach oute one to

soms， reach oute one to

“Is this supposed to mean,” he said slowly, “that we’re supposed to become an, an item? That Agnes, what a joker.”

“这是不是意味着，”他一字一顿地说，“咱们会成为，成为那啥？这个艾格尼丝还真会开玩笑。”

He was in the mood in which people burned witches. His life was quite complicated enough without it being manipulated across the centuries by some crazed old woman.

他现在的心情跟人们烧死女巫时差不多。他的生活已经够复杂了，可不想再被几世纪前的某个老疯婆子操纵。

He had even been entertaining the idea of inviting her out for a meal, but he hated the idea of some Cromwellian witch sitting in her cottage three centuries earlier and watching him eat.

牛顿甚至把玩过请她共进晚餐的念头。但一想到三百多年前，某个克伦威尔时期女巫坐在自家小屋里，欣赏他们吃饭的情景，牛顿就觉得寒毛倒竖。

A thump in the grate sounded like part of the chimney stack coming down.

壁炉里传出一记闷响，像是部分烟囱砸了下来。

And then he thought: my life isn’t complicated at all. I can see it as clearly as Agnes might. It stretches all the way to early retirement, a whipround from the people in the office, a bright little neat flat somewhere, a neat little empty death. Except now I’m going to die under the ruins of a cottage during what might just possibly be the end of the world.

接着他想到：我的生活才不复杂。用不着艾格尼丝，我都能一眼看到头。它一路通向提前退休、办公室里的人举办的欢送会、一间明亮干净的小公寓、一场干净空虚的死亡。当然，除非我马上要被压在一间小屋的废墟下，死于有可能是世界末日的今天。

The Recording Angel won’t have any trouble with me, my life must have been dittoes on every page for years. I mean, what have I ever really done? I’ve never robbed a bank. I’ve never had a parking ticket. I’ve never eaten Thai food —

掌管文书记录的天使在我这儿不会遇到任何麻烦。这些年来，我的生活肯定每一页都写着“同上”。我是说，我到底做过什么？我没抢过银行。我没得过违章停车罚单。我没吃过泰国菜…

He buried his face in her hair.

牛顿把头埋在女孩的秀发中。

The radio died as the power lines finally gave up.

电线终于抵抗不住强风，收音机也没了声音。

He was just signing for Witchfinder Private Table, who got an extra tuppence a year hay allowance, when there was another ping.

又是“叮”的一声响起时，他正在替二等兵桌子先生签名，这位忠诚的士兵得到了每年两便士的额外干草津贴。

There was a pinging sound.

“叮”的一声响起。

I’ve never been to America. Or France, because Calais doesn’t really count. I’ve never learned to play a musical instrument.

我从没去过美国。还有法国，加莱港可不能算数。我从没学会演奏乐器。

Shadwell, who had been bringing the Army pay books up to date, looked up in the middle of signing for Witchfinder Lance-Corporal Smith.

沙德维尔正在更新猎巫军薪水册，准下士史密斯的名字刚签到一半，就被这声音打断了。

He retrieved the pin, glared at it suspiciously, and pushed it so hard into the map that the plaster behind it gave way. Then he went back to the ledgers.

中士捡起钉子，狐疑地瞪着它看了几眼，然后将它使劲按进地图后面的石灰墙里，继续回去做账。

He got down from his stool, muttering under his breath, and searched around on the floor until he found it. He gave it another polish and put it back in Tadfield.

他离开凳子，一边小声嘟囔，一边在地板上搜寻。找到后，他又把钉子擦亮，重新按在塔德菲尔德。

It took him a while to notice that the gleam of Newt’s pin was no longer on the map.

中士抬起头，费了好一会儿工夫，才发现标志牛顿的那根大头针已经不在地图上。

I’ve never —

我从没…

Somewhere another window caved in, with a merry tinkle of breaking glass. Anathema put her arms around him, with a sigh which really didn’t sound disappointed at all.

又有一扇窗户迸裂，发出欢快的叮叮当当。安娜丝玛张开双臂把他抱住，随即叹了口气，但一点也不显得失望。

There was a ping.

“叮”的一声。

This time the pin was several feet from the wall. Shadwell picked it up, examined its point, pushed it into the map, and watched it.

这次大头针距离墙壁有几英尺之遥。沙德维尔把它拿起来，检查了一下针尖，按进地图，然后定睛观瞧。

After about five seconds it shot past his ear.

五秒钟后，它“嗖”的一下从中士耳边飞了过去。

He scrabbled for it on the floor, replaced it on the map, and held it there.

沙德维尔在地板上摸到钉子，放回地图上，使劲按住。

Ten seconds later Shadwell was rummaging through the WA’s cash box, which yielded a handful of copper, a ten-shilling note, and a small counterfeit coin from the reign of James I. Regardless of personal safety, he rummaged in his own pockets. The results of the trawl, even with his pensioners’ concessionary travel pass taken into consideration, were barely enough to get him out of the house, let alone to Tadfield.

十秒钟后，沙德维尔开始在军部现金匣里摸索。它吐出一把铜板、一张十先令纸币，还有个詹姆士一世统治期的伪币。沙德维尔不顾个人安危，翻找起自己的口袋。即便把退休人员特许旅行券计算在内，这一网渔获也就刚够让他走出房间，更不用说去塔德菲尔德了。

The only other people he knew who had money were Mr. Rajit and Madame Tracy. As far as the Rajits were concerned, the question of seven weeks’ rent would probably crop up in any financial discussion he instigated at this point, and as for Madame Tracy, who’d only be too willing to lend him a handful of used tenners…

兜里有钱的人，他只认识拉吉特先生和特蕾西夫人两位。说到拉吉特，此刻任何涉及金钱的对话，都可能引向七周房租的问题；至于特蕾西夫人，她倒是很乐于借给他一把十元钞票…

It moved under his hand. He leaned his weight on it.

钉子开始在他掌中耸动。沙德维尔把全身重量压在上面。

A tiny thread of smoke curled out of the map. Shadwell gave a whimper and sucked his fingers as the red-hot pin ricocheted off the opposite wall and smashed a window. It didn’t want to be in Tadfield.

一缕细细的青烟从地图上升起。沙德维尔惨叫一声，把手指放在嘴里嘬了嘬，与此同时红热的大头针射向对面墙壁，打碎了一扇窗户。它不想待在塔德菲尔德。

They’d each been here, just once, spending as little time as possible in the room and, in Aziraphale’s case, trying not to touch any flat surface. The other one, the flash southern bastard in the sunglasses, was — Shadwell suspected — not someone he ought to offend. In Shadwell’s simple world, anyone in sunglasses who wasn’t actually on a beach was probably a criminal. He suspected that Crowley was from the Mafia, or the underworld, although he would have been surprised how right he nearly was. But the soft one in the camelhair coat was a different matter, and he’d risked trailing him back to his base once, and he could remember the way. He thought Aziraphale was a Russian spy. He could ask him for money. Threaten him a bit.

天使和恶魔都曾到这儿来过一次，在屋里待了没两分钟。亚茨拉菲尔尽量不去碰触公寓的任何外表面。另一个家伙，那个戴墨镜的南方杂种，沙德维尔估计自己惹不起。在他单纯的世界观中，除了在海滩以外，任何戴墨镜的人都可能是罪犯。中士怀疑克鲁利来自黑手党，或是其他地下犯罪集团。他不知道这个推测居然准得离谱儿。但穿驼绒外套的小子就是另一码事了。沙德维尔曾冒险跟踪天使返回老窝，现在还记得路。他认为亚茨拉菲尔是个俄国间谍。可以吓他一下，诈点钱出来。

Which left no one else.

再没别人了。

“I’ll be swaggit if I’ll tak the Wages o’ Sin frae the painted jezebel,” he said.

“从这放浪女人手中拿脏钱，俺不如死了算了。”他说。

The southern pansy.

娘娘腔南蛮子。

Save one.

除了那一个。

It was terribly risky.

这样做风险很大。

Shadwell pulled himself together. Even now young Newt might be suffering unimaginable tortures at the hands of the daughters o’ night and he, Shadwell, had sent him.

沙德维尔打起精神。此时此刻，年轻的牛顿可能已被暗夜女巫们捉到，经受着难以想象的折磨。是他，沙德维尔，把他派去的。

Aziraphale was dithering. He’d been dithering for some twelve hours. His nerves, he would have said, were all over the place. He walked around the shop, picking up bits of paper and dropping them again, fiddling with pens.

亚茨拉菲尔在打哆嗦，而且已经哆嗦了大约十二小时，按他自己的说法，是神经高度紧张。天使在屋里来回转悠，随手拿起些纸片，旋即放下，然后又去摆弄钢笔。

The weather seemed to be blowing up a bit.

风雨似乎愈加凛冽。

He ought to tell Crowley.

他应该告诉克鲁利。

No, he didn’t. He wanted to tell Crowley. He ought to tell Heaven. He was an angel, after all. You had to do the right thing. It was built-in. You see a wile, you thwart. Crowley had put his finger on it, right enough. He ought to have told Heaven right from the start.

不，不对。他想告诉克鲁利。他应该告诉天堂。毕竟，他是个天使，不能走歪路。这是固有属性。你见到一桩阴谋，就要将其破坏。克鲁利知道的已经够多了。他一开始就应该告诉天堂。

“We canna leave our people in there,” he said, and put on his thin overcoat and shapeless hat and went out into the street.

“咱不能把自己人丢下。”他说着穿上薄外套，戴上没了形的帽子，走出房门。

But he’d known him for thousands of years. They got along. They nearly understood one another. He sometimes suspected they had far more in common with one another than with their respective superiors. They both liked the world, for one thing, rather than viewing it simply as the board on which the cosmic game of chess was being played.

但他认识恶魔有好几千年了。他俩始终在一起，可以说知根知底。亚茨拉菲尔有时怀疑，和可敬的上级相比，克鲁利跟他的共同点倒更多些。比方说，他们都喜欢这个世界，不仅仅把它看作宇宙棋局的秤盘。

Yes. And then everything would be all right.

对，然后就万事大吉了。

Getting in touch with Heaven for two-way communications was far more difficult for Aziraphale than it is for humans, who don’t expect an answer and in nearly all cases would be rather surprised to get one.

同天堂进行交互式通信联络，对天使来说难度比人类更大。毕竟人类根本没指望得到回答，真遇上碰巧接通的情况，他们几乎都大为惊诧。

There was a knock at the shop door, despite the CLOSED sign. He ignored it.

尽管店门外挂着“停业”的牌子，但还是有人突然敲了敲门。亚茨拉菲尔没有理会。

Well, of course, that was it. That was the answer, staring him in the face. It’d be true to the spirit of his pact with Crowley if he tipped Heaven the wink, and then they could quietly do something about the child, although nothing too bad of course because we were all God’s creatures when you got down to it, even people like Crowley and the Antichrist, and the world would be saved and there wouldn’t have to be all that Armageddon business, which would do nobody any good anyway, because everyone knew Heaven would win in the end, and Crowley would be bound to understand.

哦，当然，就是它。答案就在这儿，正直勾勾地盯着他。其实给天堂通风报信正符合他和克鲁利之间的协议精神。上界肯定会对那孩子做点什么，当然，不会有什么特别可怕的。说到底，我们都是上帝的造物，就连克鲁利和敌基督这样的人也一样。而且世界会得救，再也用不着搞世界末日大决战之类的玩意儿，那对谁都没好处。因为所有人都知道，最终获胜的肯定是天堂，克鲁利早晚会明白的。

He pushed aside the paper-laden desk and rolled up the threadbare bookshop carpet. There was a small circle chalked on the floorboards underneath, surrounded by suitable passages from the Cabala. The angel lit seven candles, which he placed ritually at certain points around the circle. Then he lit some incense, which was not necessary but did make the place smell nice.

亚茨拉菲尔推开堆满纸张的桌子，卷起店里破旧的地毯。地板上有个用粉笔画的小圈，周围有恰如其分的秘法符记。天使点起七根蜡烛，按照仪式放在圆环的特定位置，然后又烧了些薰香。这并非必不可少的步骤，但确实有助于改善屋里的味道。

When it came, the voice sounded slightly annoyed.

那声音再度响起时，感觉略显烦躁。

“Well?” it said again.

“嗯？”它又说了一遍。

He said the Words again.

他又说了一遍。

“We know,” said the voice.

“我们知道。”那声音说。

“It’s me, Aziraphale.”

“是我，亚茨拉菲尔。”

“Well done,” said the voice, in flat, dead tones.

“干得好。”那声音不带感情地说。

“Yes?” said the voice.

“是吗？”那声音说。

Nothing happened.

没动静。

“There doesn’t have to be any of that business with one third of the seas turning to blood or anything,” said Aziraphale happily.

“用不着三分之一海洋化作血池之类的玩意儿了。”亚茨拉菲尔高兴地说。

He beamed madly into the light.

他疯狂地冲蓝光微笑。

Aziraphale felt an icy pit opening under his enthusiasm, and tried to pretend it wasn’t happening.

亚茨拉菲尔意识到自己的兴奋之情下方出现一个冰洞，但他假装没看见。

“But, d’you see, you can ki — man stop it all happening! In the nick of time! You’ve only got a few hours! You can stop it all and there needn’t be the war and everyone will be saved!”

“你知道，你们可以杀…阻止这一切！时间刚刚好！你们只有几个小时！你们可以阻止这一切，不需要开战，所有人都会得救！”

There was a pause. The blue light flickered.

片刻沉默过后，蓝光微微闪烁。

“I’ve got great news! I’ve located the Antichrist! I can give you his address and everything!”

“我有重要情报！我找到了敌基督！我可以告诉你们他的地址和一切情况！”

“Yes, he’s in a place called Lower Tadfield, and the address –“

“是的，他所在的地方叫下塔德菲尔德，地址是…”

A well-educated voice said, “Well?”

一个显然受过良好教育的声音说：“嗯？”

Eventually a bright blue shaft of light shot down from the ceiling and filled the circle.

一道蓝光从天花板上照射下来，充盈在圆环之间。

“Why not?” it said.

“干吗不用？”它说。

And then he stood in the circle and said the Words.

他站到圆环中央，说了那些密语。

Aziraphale felt the coldness envelop his mind. He opened his mouth to say, “Do you think perhaps it would be a good idea not to hold the war on Earth?” and changed his mind.

寒意笼住天使的心灵。他想开口说“你不觉得不在地球上开战也许是个好主意吗”，但又改了主意。

“Thank you,” said Aziraphale. The bitterness in his voice would have soured milk. “I’d forgotten about ineffability, obviously.”

“谢谢。”亚茨拉菲尔说，他语气中的酸味足以让牛奶变馊。“我显然忘记了不可言喻的问题。”

“Yes, but –“

“对，但是…”

The voice said, “We are the Metatron.” [The Voice of God. But not the voice of God. An entity in its own right. Rather like a Presidential spokesman.]

那声音说：“我是上帝之声梅塔特隆。”（但不是上帝的声音，而是独立存在的实体。相当于总统发言人。）

“This is not to say you have not performed well,” said the voice. “You will receive a commendation. Well done.”

“不是说你表现得不好。”那声音说，“你会得到一次嘉奖。干得漂亮。”

“I see,” he said grimly. There was a scraping near the door, and if Aziraphale had been looking in that direction he would have seen a battered felt hat trying to peer over the fanlight.

“我明白了。”亚茨拉菲尔冷淡地说。门口传来一阵刮蹭声，如果天使往那边看上一眼，就会发现一顶破毡帽正试图透过气窗朝屋里窥探。

“The forces of darkness must be beaten. You seem to be under a misapprehension. The point is not to avoid the war, it is to win it. We have been waiting a long time, Aziraphale.”

“黑暗势力必被击败。你似乎有点误解。关键不是规避大战，而是赢得大战。我们已经等了很久，亚茨拉菲尔。”

“We thought you had.”

“我们也是这么觉得。”

“We will win, Aziraphale.”

“我们会大获全胜，亚茨拉菲尔。”

He plunged on: “Well, you can simply make sure that –“

天使继续说：“哦，你们只要保证…”

“May I ask,” said the angel, “to whom have I been speaking?”

“可否容我问上一句，”天使说，“我这是在跟谁通话？”

“One other thing,” said the voice. “You will of course be joining us, won’t you?”

“还有一件事。”那声音说，“你肯定会加入我们，对吗？”

“Oh. Yes. Very imaginative.” Aziraphale’s voice was flat and hopeless.

“哦，是的。很有创意。”亚茨拉菲尔的声音平淡而绝望。

“We thought a multi-nation nuclear exchange would be a nice start.”

“我们认为一场多国热核战争会是不错的开始。”

“Well, er, of course it has been simply ages since I’ve held a flaming sword –” Aziraphale began.

“哦，呃，我也不过是几千年没拿炎剑而已…”亚茨拉菲尔说。

“Yes, we recall,” said the voice. “You will have a lot of opportunity to relearn.”

“嗯，我们记得。”那声音说，“你有很多机会可以重新学习。”

Aziraphale drew himself up. “I really feel that probity, not to say morality, demands that as a reputable businessman I should –“

亚茨拉菲尔竭力打起精神。“作为注重名誉的生意人，我的确认为诚实的品行——更不用说道德——要求我…”

“Ah. Well. I’ll just clear up a few business matters, shall I?” said Aziraphale desperately.

“啊。好的。我只需要料理完一些生意上的事，好吗？”亚茨拉菲尔绝望地说。

“There hardly seems to be any necessity,” said the Metatron.

“似乎没有这个必要。”梅塔特隆说。

“Yes, yes,” said the Metatron, a shade testily. “Point taken. We shall await you, then.”

“是的，是的。”梅塔特隆略显烦躁地说，“明白你的意思。那么我们会等你的。”

Behind him the letterbox tilted open, revealing a pair of eyes.

在他身后，房门上的邮件投递口被人捅开，露出了两只眼睛。

“Good. We will expect you directly, then,” said the voice.

“很好。那么我们将期待你的到来。”那声音说。

“Ah. Hmm. What sort of initiating event will precipitate the war?” said Aziraphale.

“啊，嗯。引发大战的前奏是什么？”亚茨拉菲尔说。

“Oh, yes. Of course. Oh. Well. Thank you very much. Thank you.”

“哦，是的。当然。哦，好的。万分感谢。多谢。”

He took the phone away from his mouth.

他把听筒拿远。

“Shutup! Listen! It was in Tadfield! It’s all in that book! You’ve got to stop –“

“闭嘴！听着！它在塔德菲尔德！书里都写了！你必须阻止…”

“Stop making noises! It’s in Tadfield! That was what I was sensing! You must go there and –“

“别再出怪声了！在塔德菲尔德！这就是我察觉到的东西！你必须去…”

Very carefully, he stepped over the circle and crept to the telephone. He opened his notebook and dialed another number.

亚茨拉菲尔小心翼翼地走出圆环，来到电话机旁。他打开电话簿，拨了另一个号码。

BeeeEEeeeEEeee

“嘀——嘀——嘀——”

“I want to talk to you now –“

“我现在有事跟你说…”

“– probably not in right now, or asleep, and busy, or something, but –“

“…现在可能不在，或是睡觉，或是在忙，或是别的什么。请…”

“– after the tone and I’ll get right back to you. Chow.”

“…在嘀声后留言，我会尽快回复。回见。”

“Bugger!” he said. It was the first time he’d sworn in more than four thousand years.

“混蛋！”天使说。这是四千多年来他第一次说脏字。

“Crowley!” Aziraphale tried to hiss and shout at the same time, “Listen! I haven’t got much time! The –“

“克鲁利！”亚茨拉菲尔试图把喊叫和嘶叫合二为一，“听着！我没多少时间！那…”

“Hallo?” he said softly, “Anyone still there?”

“嗨？”他轻声说道，“还有人吗？”

There was silence.

只有一片寂静。

The light faded, but did not quite vanish. They’re leaving the line open, Aziraphale thought. I’m not getting out of this one.

光线黯淡下去，但没有完全消失。亚茨拉菲尔心想，他们没有切断线路。这回我是走不脱了。

After four rings it gave a little cough, followed by a pause, and then a voice which sounded so laid back you could put a carpet on it said, “Hi. This is Anthony Crowley. Uh. I –“

四下铃响过后，话筒中传来一声轻咳，片刻停顿，然后一个平和到可以在上面铺地毯的声音说：“嗨。我是安东尼·克鲁利。嗯。我…”

Shadwell was trembling with excitement. He’d seen it all. He’d heard it all. He hadn’t understood any of it, but he knew what people did with circles and candlesticks and incense. He knew that all right. He’d seen The Devil Rides Out fifteen times, sixteen times if you included the time he’d been thrown out of the cinema for shouting his unflattering opinions of amateur witchfinder Christopher Lee.

沙德维尔激动得浑身发抖。他都看见了。他都听见了。虽然完全无法理解，但中士很清楚人们会用神秘圆环、蜡烛和薰香做什么。这些他都心知肚明。《魔鬼出击》那部电影他看过十五次，如果算上中途被人从电影院里扔出来的那回，就是十六次。也许他对剧中新手猎巫人克利斯托夫·李的超低评价，不应该大声喊出来。

“Crowley, it’s me!”

“克鲁利，是我！”

He found the other number. He dialed it. It was answered almost immediately, at the same time as the shop’s bell tingled gently.

亚茨拉菲尔找到另一个号码。他拨通电话。这次几乎立刻就有人接听，与此同时店铺的铃铛也轻轻响了一下。

Hold on. The demon had another line, didn’t he? He was that kind of person. Aziraphale fumbled in the book, nearly dropping it on the floor. They would be getting impatient soon.

等等。恶魔还有个电话，不是吗？他就是这种人。亚茨拉菲尔翻找着电话簿，几乎把它掉在地上。他们就快耐不住性子了。

“Nuh. Got an old friend here.”

“哦。有个老朋友在。”

Crowley’s voice, getting louder as it neared the mouthpiece, said, “– really mean it. Hallo?”

克鲁利的声音逐渐接近话筒，变得越来越响。“…是认真的。你好？”

“Ngh.” The voice was horribly noncommittal. Even in his present state, Aziraphale sensed trouble.

“哦。”这个声音极其含混。尽管心情异常激动，但亚茨拉菲尔还是察觉到恶魔现在有麻烦。

“Listen –“

“听着…我…”

Very slowly, Aziraphale turned around.

亚茨拉菲尔非常缓慢地转过身来。

“Awa’ we ye, ye spawn o’ hell!”

“滚回去，侬这地狱邪魔！”

“Are you alone?” he said cautiously.

“你是一个人吗？”他谨慎地说。

“No, I mean –“

“不，我的意思是…”

“I bet they ain’t!” said Shadwell triumphantly.

“俺敢说的确不是那么回事！”沙德维尔耀武扬威地说。

“Book,” he snarled.

“书。”他咆哮道。

“I could see what yer were about,” snarled Shadwell. There were flecks of foam around his mouth. He was more angry than he could ever remember.

“俺瞅见了侬干的丑事。”沙德维尔怒吼道。他嘴巴周围沾上了点点白沫，心中的怒火比以往任何时候更盛。

“Er, things are not what they seem –” Aziraphale began, aware even as he said it that as conversational gambits went it lacked a certain polish.

“呃，事情并不像表面上…”亚茨拉菲尔开口说，但与此同时已然察觉这句话作为开场白缺乏必要的修饰。

“Bell,” he said.

“铃。”他说。

He fumbled in his pocket and produced his trusty Ronson.

他在口袋里翻找一通，掏出生锈的朗森打火机。

Without taking his eyes off the angel, Shadwell shuffled backwards and grabbed the shop door, slamming it hard so that the bell jangled.

中士死盯着天使，向后蹭了几步抓住店门，使劲往后一摔，让门铃发出刺耳的响声。

“I’ll have ye, ye evil bastard!” he shouted, advancing like a motheaten avenging angel. “I ken what ye be about, cumin’ up here and seducin’ wimmen to do yer evil will!”

“俺会干掉侬，侬这龟孙子！”沙德维尔大叫着步步进逼，就像个被虫蛀过的复仇天使，“俺知道侬想干什么，跑到这儿来引诱女子，来满足你邪恶的意志！”

He grabbed The Nice and Accurate Prophecies and thumped it down heavily on the table.

中士拿起《精良准确预言书》，重重拍在桌上。

The buggers were using him. They’d been making fools out o’ the glorious traditions o’ the Army.

这些混蛋在利用他。他们在愚弄猎巫军的辉煌传统。

“I think perhaps you’ve got the wrong shop,” said Aziraphale. “I’ll call back later,” he told the receiver, and hung up.

“我想您可能进错了店铺。”亚茨拉菲尔说，“我过会儿再给你打。”他冲话筒说了一句，随即挂断电话。

“Er,” said Aziraphale, “I think it might not be a very good idea to –“

“呃。”亚茨拉菲尔说，“我想这也许不是个特别好的主意…”

Shadwell wasn’t listening. “By the powers invested in me by virtue o’ my office o’ Witchfinder,” he intoned, “I charge ye to quit from this place –“

沙德维尔根本听不进去。“以襄助吾辈之神灵起誓，以猎巫军之职责起誓。”他吟咏道，“吾令汝速离此界…”

Aziraphale looked down at his feet, and swore for the second time in five minutes. He’d stepped into the circle.

亚茨拉菲尔向下看了一眼，五分钟内再度说起脏话。他已经踏进圆环。

“– and return henceforth to the place from which ye came, pausin’ not to –“

“…返汝之来处，不得有误…”

“Keep out of the circle, you stupid man!”

“离那个圈远点儿，你这蠢货！”

“– never to come again to vex –“

“…永不再…”

“– and deliver us frae evil –“

“…令吾辈远离邪恶…”

In his path, the circle glowed with a faint blue light.

圆环在他前方闪烁着暗淡的蓝光。

There was a melodious twang, and the blue glow vanished. So did Aziraphale.

空中传来一声音调优美的弦音，蓝光消失了，亚茨拉菲尔也没了踪影。

“Yes, yes, but please keep out of –“

“好的，好的，但请你躲开那个…”

“You see, the circle –“

“你看，那圆环…”

“– it would really be unwise for a human to set foot in it without –“

“…作为人类踏进去是很不明智的…”

“– returning NAE MORE!” Shadwell finished. He pointed a vengeful, black-nailed finger.

“…回！”沙德维尔念完咒语，伸出一根充满仇恨、甲缝藏污纳垢的手指。

“Oh, fuck,” he said.

“哦，我操。”他说。

Aziraphale ran toward Shadwell, waving his hands urgently.

亚茨拉菲尔向中士跑去，拼命挥舞着双手。

“Practically candle!” he shouted, and began to advance.

“实用点火物。”他叫喊着向前逼近。

Thirty seconds went by. Shadwell didn’t move. Then, with a trembling left hand, he reached up and carefully lowered his right hand.

三十秒过去了。沙德维尔一动没动。接着，他抬起颤颤巍巍的左手，小心翼翼地把右手按下。

Shadwell shivered. Then, with his hand held out in front of him like a gun that he didn’t dare fire and didn’t know how to unload, he stepped out into the street, letting the door slam behind him.

沙德维尔打了个哆嗦。他把一只手举在身前，就像举着一把不敢开火也不知道如何退子弹的手枪。他走到街上，任由店门在身后关闭。

No one answered.

没人回答。

“Hallo?” he said. “Hallo?”

“你好？”他说，“有人在吗？”

Crowley’s London flat was the epitome of style. It was everything that a flat should be: spacious, white, elegantly furnished, and with that designer unlived-in look that only comes from not being lived in.

克鲁利在伦敦的公寓是时尚家居的典范。它具有公寓所应具有的一切优点：宽敞、整洁、家装精美雅致。在从不入住的设计师们看来，只有无人居住的样板间才能具有这些优点。

It shook the floor. One of Aziraphale’s candles fell over, spilling burning wax across the old, dry wood.

大门的撞击震动了地板。亚茨拉菲尔摆的蜡烛倒了一根，燃烧的烛油洒在干燥陈旧的木地板上。

This is because Crowley did not live there.

因为克鲁利就不住在这儿。

It was simply the place he went back to, at the end of the day, when he was in London. The beds were always made; the fridge was always stocked with gourmet food that never went off (that was why Crowley had a fridge, after all), and for that matter the fridge never needed to be defrosted, or even plugged in.

这儿只是他在伦敦时，每天晚上要回来的地方。床铺永远都是铺好的，冰箱里永远塞满精致的食物，而且从来不会吃完（毕竟这就是克鲁利需要一台冰箱的原因），因此这台冰箱也永远不需要除霜，甚至不用插上电源。

The lounge contained a huge television, a white leather sofa, a video and a laserdisc player, an ansaphone, two telephones — the ansaphone line, and the private line (a number so far undiscovered by the legions of telephone salesmen who persisted in trying to sell Crowley double glazing, which he already had, or life insurance, which he didn’t need)– and a square matte black sound system, the kind so exquisitely engineered that it just has the on-off switch and the volume control. The only sound equipment Crowley had overlooked was speakers; he’d forgotten about them. Not that it made any difference. The sound reproduction was quite perfect anyway.

休息室里有一台巨大的电视、一个白色皮质沙发、一台录像机和一台激光影碟机、一部自动答录机、两部电话——一部接自动答录机，一部是私人电话（这个号码暂时还没被电话推销员军团发现，这帮人老想让克鲁利购买他已经有了的双层玻璃窗，以及他不需要的人寿保险）——还有一个方方正正的黑色音响系统，就是那种设计极其精巧的款式，上面只有开关和音量控制键。唯一被克鲁利忽视的音响设备是扬声器，他把这玩意儿给忘了。不过也没什么区别。声音重现效果还是那么完美。

There was an unconnected fax machine with the intelligence of a computer and a computer with the intelligence of a retarded ant. Nevertheless, Crowley upgraded it every few months, because a sleek computer was the sort of thing Crowley felt that the sort of human he tried to be would have. This one was like a Porsche with a screen. The manuals were still in their transparent wrapping.

屋里还有一台智能水平相当于电脑的没接通的传真机，以及一台智能水平相当于弱智蚂蚁的电脑。尽管如此，克鲁利还是每隔几个月就为它升级，因为他觉得自己伪装成的那种人，肯定应该拥有新潮电脑。它就像一台带屏幕的保时捷跑车。说明书还包在塑料袋中没有打开过。

[Along with the standard computer warranty agreement which said that if the machine 1) didn’t work, 2) didn’t do what the expensive advertisements said, 3) electrocuted the immediate neighborhood, 4) and in fact failed entirely to be inside the expensive box when you opened it, this was expressly, absolutely, implicitly and in no event the fault or responsibility of the manufacturer, that the purchaser should consider himself lucky to be allowed to give his money to the manufacturer, and that any attempt to treat what had just been paid for as the purchaser’s own property would result in the attentions of serious men with menacing briefcases and very thin watches. Crowley had been extremely impressed with the warranties offered by the computer industry, and had in fact sent a bundle Below to the department that drew up the Immortal Soul agreements, with a yellow memo form attached just saying: “Learn, guys…”]

（还有标准电脑授权协议书。那上面写道“如果电脑1）不能工作，2）不能像昂贵的广告中所说的那样工作，3）电死周围的生物，4）你打开时发现电脑根本不在买来的昂贵盒子里，这显然、绝对、无疑且无一例外地不是生产厂家的错误和责任。购买者应该认为能够把钱交给生产厂家，这是天大的幸运。另外购买者对自己刚买下的这台私人财产所进行的任何操作，都终将招致配备骇人公文包和超薄手表的严肃人士密切关注”。计算机公司提供的授权书让克鲁利印象深刻，他还寄了一包给下界起草“不朽灵魂协议”的部门，顺便贴了张黄色便条，上面写道“学着点儿，伙计们…”）

In fact the only things in the flat Crowley devoted any personal attention to were the houseplants. They were huge and green and glorious, with shiny, healthy, lustrous leaves.

公寓中让克鲁利投入精力的只有那些盆栽。它们又大又绿又茂盛，叶片健康茁壮，泛着光泽。

What he did was put the fear of God into them.

他所做的是向盆栽们灌输对上帝的敬畏。

Then he would leave the flat with the offending plant, and return an hour or so later with a large, empty flower pot, which he would leave somewhere conspicuously around the flat.

然后他会拿着这盆冒犯天威的植物离开公寓，过一个小时左右，带着大空花盆回来，放在公寓中显眼的位置。

This was because, once a week, Crowley went around the flat with a green plastic plant mister, spraying the leaves, and talking to the plants.

这是因为克鲁利每周一次拿着绿色塑料喷雾器，为叶子喷水，跟盆栽聊天。

He had heard about talking to plants in the early seventies, on Radio Four, and thought it an excellent idea. Although talking is perhaps the wrong word for what Crowley did.

他是在七十年代早期，从BBC第四套广播中听到了这个方法，并马上认定这是绝妙的主意。但聊天这个词并不足以描述克鲁利的行为。

The plants were the most luxurious, verdant, and beautiful in London. Also the most terrified.

这里的盆栽是全伦敦最繁茂、最翠绿、最美丽的，同时也是最担惊受怕的。

In addition to which, every couple of months Crowley would pick out a plant that was growing too slowly, or succumbing to leaf-wilt or browning, or just didn’t look quite as good as the others, and he would carry it around to all the other plants. “Say goodbye to your friend,” he’d say to them. “He just couldn’t cut it…”

除此以外，他每隔几个月就会选一盆长得太慢，或是患上枯叶病，或是变黄，或者只是不如同伴们长得好的盆栽。克鲁利会拿着它走到其他盆栽面前。“跟你们的朋友说再见吧。”他会对它们说，“他就是搞不定…”

More precisely, the fear of Crowley.

更准确地说，是对克鲁利的敬畏。

The lounge was lit by spotlights and white neon tubes, of the kind one casually props against a chair or a corner.

休息室由聚光灯和一些随便靠在椅子上或是墙角里的白色霓虹灯管提供照明。

He had spent an uncomfortable time in each of these rooms, during the long wait for the End of the world.

在对世界末日的漫长守候中，克鲁利焦躁不安地在这些房间里来回转悠。

Crowley had a bedroom, and a kitchen, and an office, and a lounge, and a toilet: each room forever clean and perfect.

克鲁利有一间卧室、一间厨房、一间办公室、一间休息室和一个厕所。每个房间都永远干净整洁。

He had phoned his operatives in the Witchfinder Army again, to try to get news, but his contact, Sergeant Shadwell, had just gone out, and the dimwitted receptionist seemed unable to grasp that he was willing to talk to any of the others.

他又给猎巫军联络人打了个电话，试图获取最新情报。但他的眼线沙德维尔中士出门去了，而那傻乎乎的前台似乎完全听不明白，他是想跟总部里随便什么人谈谈。

The only wall decoration was a framed drawing — the cartoon for the Mona Lisa, Leonardo da Vinci’s original sketch. Crowley had bought it from the artist one hot afternoon in Florence, and felt it was superior to the final painting.

四壁唯一的装饰品是一幅裱好的蒙娜丽莎漫画，这是里奥纳多·达·芬奇最初的草稿。在佛罗伦萨的一个炎热下午，克鲁利从画家手中买下了这幅作品，并认为它比最终那幅油画要好。

[Leonardo had felt so too. “I got her bloody smile right in the roughs,” he told Crowley’ sipping cold wine in the lunchtime sun, “but it went all over the place when I painted it. Her husband had a few things to say about it when I delivered it, but, like I tell him, Signor del Giocondo, apart from you, who’s going to see it? Anyway… explain this helicopter thing again, will you?”]

（里奥纳多·达·芬奇也有同感。“我在草稿上把她那该死的微笑画得分毫不差，”他坐在午后的艳阳下，品着凉酒，对克鲁利说，“但真画起来却走了样。我交画时，她丈夫有点不满。但正如我跟他所说的那样，戴尔·吉奥亢多阁下，除您以外，还有谁会看到它呢？总之…再给我解释一遍这个叫直升机的玩意儿，好吗？”）

Crowley gave up. He tried to read a novel, but couldn’t concentrate. He tried to sort his CDs into alphabetical order, but gave up when he discovered they already were in alphabetical order, as was his bookcase, and his collection of Soul Music.

克鲁利放弃了。他试图看本小说，但无法集中精神。他试图把自己的CD按字母顺序整理好，但很快也放弃了。因为克鲁利发现它们已经按字母顺序整理好了，藏书也是，他的灵魂乐收藏品也是。

“Mr. Pulsifer is out too, love,” she told him. “He went down to Tadfield this morning. On a mission.”

“帕西法先生出门了，亲爱的。”她说，“他今天早晨到塔德菲尔德去了。出任务。”

“I’ll speak to anyone,” Crowley had explained.

“我想跟随便什么人谈谈。”克鲁利解释说。

Eventually he settled down on the white leather sofa and gestured on the television.

恶魔最终坐在白沙发里，冲电视挥了挥手。

“I’ll tell Mr. Shadwell that,” she had said, “when he gets back. Now if you don’t mind, it’s one of my mornings, and I can’t leave my gentleman like that for long or he’ll catch his death. And at two I’ve got Mrs. Ormerod and Mr. Scroggie and young Julia coming over for a sitting, and there’s the place to clean and all beforehand. But I’ll give Mr. Shadwell your message.”

“我会告诉沙德维尔先生的。”她这样说，“等他一回来就说。那么如果您不介意的话，今天上午我要工作，我不能让那位绅士等这么长时间，不然他会感冒的。而且下午两点奥默罗德夫人、史考基先生和小朱莉娅还要过来坐坐。我得收拾房间，提前做准备。但我会把您的口信带给沙德维尔先生。”

[He was very proud of his collection. It had taken him ages to put together. This was real Soul music. James Brown wasn’t in it.]

（这套藏品让克鲁利特别自豪。他花了几千年把它们收集起来。这是真正的灵魂乐。所谓的灵魂乐教父詹姆斯·布朗根本不在其列。）

“Reports are coming in,” said a worried newscaster, “uh, reports are, well, nobody seems to know what’s going on, but reports available to us would seem to, uh, indicate an increase in international tensions that would have undoubtedly been viewed as impossible this time last week when, er, everyone seemed to be getting on so nicely. Er.

“有消息称，”一位忧心忡忡的新闻播报员说，“呃，有消息称，是的，谁也不知道是怎么回事，但我们现有的消息，呃，显示紧张局势正在加剧。换作上周这个时间，谁都会认为这是不可能的，呃，当时所有人都相处得很好。呃。

“This would seem at least partly due to the spate of unusual events which have occurred over the last few days.

“这一事态似乎至少部分来源于，近些天大量出现的异常事件。

“Off the coast of Japan-” CROWLEY?

“在日本海岸…”克鲁利？

“Yes,” admitted Crowley.

“是我。”克鲁利说。

THE BOY CALLED WARLOCK. WE HAVE BROUGHT HIM TO THE FIELDS OF MEGGIDO. THE DOG IS NOT WITH HIM. THE CHILD KNOWS NOTHING OF THE GREAT WAR. HE IS NOT OUR MASTER’S SON.

那个叫沃洛克的孩子。我们把他带到美吉多战场。狗不在他身边，那孩子也完全不明白末日之战是什么。他不是我主之子。

“How do you mean?” Crowley asked, although he already knew.

“您是什么意思？”尽管克鲁利已经知道答案，但他还是问了一句。

WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON, CROWLEY? WHAT EXACTLY HAVE YOU BEEN DOING?

这究竟是怎么回事，克鲁利？你一直都在干些什么？

IS THAT ALL YOU CAN SAY, CROWLEY? OUR TROOPS ARE ASSEMBLED, THE FOUR BEASTS HAVE BEGUN TO RIDE — BUT WHERE ARE THEY RIDING TO? SOMETHING HAS GONE WRONG, CROWLEY AND IT IS YOUR RESPONSIBILITY. AND, IN ALL PROBABILITY, YOUR FAULT. WE TRUST YOU HAYS A PERFECTLY REASONABLE EXPLANATION FOR ALL THIS…

你要说的就是这些吗，克鲁利？我们的军队已经集结，四活物已经上马——但他们要骑向何方？有些事出了问题，克鲁利，这是你的责任。而且很有可能是你的错误。我们相信你会有个极其合理的解释…

“Ah,” said Crowley.

“啊。”克鲁利说。

“Oh yes,” agreed Crowley, readily. “Perfectly reasonable.”

“哦，当然。”克鲁利镇静地说，“极其合理。”

… BECAUSE YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE YOUR CHANCE TO EXPLAIN IT ALL TO US YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE ALL THE TIME THERE IS TO EXPLAIN. AND WE WILL LISTEN WITH GREAT INTEREST TO EVERYTHING YOU HAVE TO SAY. AND YOUR CONVERSATION. AND THE CIRCUMSTANCES THAT WILL ACCOMPANY IT, WILL PROVIDE A SOURCE OF ENTERTAINMENT AND PLEASURE FOR ALL THE DAMNED OF HELL, CROWLEY BECAUSE NO MATTER HOW RACKED WITH TORMENT, NO MATTER WHAT AGONIES THE LOWEST OF THE DAMNED ARE SUFFERING, CROWLEY, YOU WILL HAVE IT WORSE —

…因为你将在我们面前一五一十解释清楚。你会有很多时间来解释。我们特别有兴趣听你所说的每一个字。而且你所说的话，以及到时候的处境，会为地狱中的所有受难灵魂提供娱乐和快慰，克鲁利。因为无论那些折磨有多么难熬，无论最下层的罪人所经受的刑罚有多么痛苦，克鲁利，你所经历的都会更糟…

Crowley went to the window and looked out. Something black and car-shaped was moving slowly down the street toward him. It was carshaped enough to fool the casual observer. Crowley, who was observing very carefully, noticed that not only were the wheels not going round, but they weren’t even attached to the car. It was slowing down as it passed each house; Crowley assumed that the car’s passengers (neither of them would be driving; neither of them knew how) were peering out at the house numbers.

克鲁利走到窗口，向外望去。下方街道上，有个车形黑色物体正朝这边缓缓驶来。它的样子很像车，足以欺骗不经意的目光。但克鲁利看得特别仔细，他发现轮子不仅不转，而且根本就没连在车上。它经过每栋房子时都要减速。克鲁利估计车里的乘客（他们肯定都不是司机，更不知道该怎么开车）正在观察门牌号码。

DO NOT EVEN THINK ABOUT TRYING TO ESCAPE US, CROWLEY THERE IS NO ESCAPE. STAY WHERE YOU ARE. YOU WILL BE… COLLECTED…

别妄想从我们手中逃脱，克鲁利。你无路可逃。待在原地。你会被…接收…

The Infernal Authorities had ceased communicating. Crowley turned the television to the wall, just in case.

地狱有关部门已经停止通信。克鲁利把电视机屏幕转向墙壁，以防万一。

The dull gray-green screen continued enunciating; the silence formed itself into words.

黯淡的灰绿色屏幕还在说话，寂静本身凝成了字句。

He walked over to the Mona Lisa.

他走到蒙娜丽莎面前。

He had a little time. Crowley went into the kitchen, and got a plastic bucket from under the sink. Then he went back into the lounge.

他还有一点时间。克鲁利走进厨房，从水槽下面拿出一个塑料桶，然后回到休息室。

With a gesture, Crowley turned the set off.

克鲁利一挥手把电视关掉。

Inside the safe were a thermos flask, two heavy PVC gloves, of the kind that covered one’s entire arms, and some tongs.

保险柜里放着个保温瓶，还有一双胶皮手套，就是那种可以套住整个胳膊，还带夹具的玩意儿。

He unlocked it, revealing an inner door with a dial tumble lock. He spun the dial (4–0–0–4 was the code, easy to remember, the year he had slithered onto this stupid, marvelous planet, back when it was gleaming and new).

恶魔打开柜门，露出带有号码盘的内门。他拨动转盘。（密码是4004，很好记，那一年他爬到了这个愚蠢又奇妙的星球。当时这里还崭新发亮。）

Crowley paused. He eyed the flask nervously.

克鲁利定了定神，紧张地看着热水瓶。

(There was a crash from downstairs. That had been the front door…)

（楼下传来一记撞击声，那里曾是前门…）

Crowley lifted the picture down from the wall, revealing a safe. It was not a wall safe; it had been bought from a company that specialized in servicing the nuclear industry.

克鲁利把画从墙上摘下来，露出一个保险柜。这不是普通的墙壁保险柜，而是从一家专门为核工业服务的公司买来的。

He pulled on the gloves and gingerly took the flask, and the tongs, and the bucket — and, as an afterthought, he grabbed the plant mister from beside a luxuriant rubber plant — and headed for his office, walking like a man carrying a thermos flask full of something that might cause, if he dropped it or even thought about dropping it, the sort of explosion that impels graybeards to make statements like “And where this crater is now, once stood the City of Wah-Shing-Ton,” in SF B-movies.

他戴上手套，谨慎地拿起水瓶、夹具和水桶，转念一想，又从一盆繁茂的橡胶树旁拿起了喷雾器，随即走向办公室。他一路小心翼翼，就好像热水瓶里盛满了某种危险物质，一旦掉在地上，甚至是动一下掉在地上的念头，都会产生旷古未有的大爆炸，足以让三流科幻片里的老人说出这样的台词：“这个弹坑所在的位置，曾经矗立着花生顿城。”

A bead of sweat began to form on Crowley’s forehead, and trickled down into one eye. He flicked it away.

一滴汗珠出现在克鲁利的额头上，流进了眼睛。恶魔把它掸掉。

He reached his office, nudged open the door with his shoulder. Then he bent his legs, and slowly put things down on the floor. Bucket… tongs… plant mister… and finally, deliberately, the flask.

他来到办公室，用肩膀顶开房门，然后慢慢下蹲，把手里的东西轻轻放在地板上。桶…夹具…喷雾器…最后战战兢兢地放下了保温瓶。

He gripped the flask with the tongs, and taking care not to spill the tiniest drop, he poured the contents into the plastic bucket. One false move was all it would take.

他用夹具捏起水瓶，不敢掉出哪怕半滴。他把瓶里的东西倒进水桶。只要稍有闪失，就全完了。

Then, with care and deliberation, he used the tongs to unscrew the top of the flask… carefully… carefully… that was it…

他极其小心地用夹具拧开瓶盖…小心…小心…就是这样…

(A pounding on the stairs below him, and a muffled scream. That would have been the little old lady on the floor below.)

（楼下传来“嘭”的一声，然后是一阵沉闷的尖叫。应该是住在楼下的那位小老太太。）

He could not afford to rush.

克鲁利绝对不能急躁。

There.

搞定。

Then he opened the office door about six inches, and placed the bucket on top.

他把办公室的门打开六英寸缝隙，将桶放在顶上。

“Crawlee…?” called a guttural voice. Hastur.

“克蠕戾…？”一个粗哑的声音喊道。是哈斯塔。

He used the tongs to replace the top of the flask, then (– a crash from his outer hallway –) pulled off the PVC gloves, picked up the plant mister, and settled himself behind his desk.

他用夹具把盖子拧好，然后（…走廊里传来一记撞击声…）摘下树脂手套，拿起喷雾器，坐到办公桌后。

Now, as Crowley would be the first to protest, most demons weren’t deep down evil. In the great cosmic game they felt they occupied the same position as tax inspectors — doing an unpopular job, maybe, but essential to the overall operation of the whole thing. If it came to that, some angels weren’t paragons of virtue; Crowley had met one or two who, when it came to righteously smiting the ungodly, smote a good deal harder than was strictly necessary. On the whole, everyone had a job to do, and just did it.

如果有人说恶魔骨子里就是邪恶的，克鲁利会头一个跳出来表示反对，大多数恶魔并非如此。在这场宇宙棋局中，他们自我感觉就跟税务监察员一样——也许是做着不受欢迎的工作，但对全局来说至关重要。说到这里，其实有些天使也并非道德标兵。克鲁利就遇到过两三个家伙，一遇到要对冒渎之人施以正义惩戒的任务，就表现得特别积极，下手狠得要命。总而言之，每人都有自己的工作，只是履行职责罢了。

Hastur and Ligur.

哈斯塔和利古尔。

“In here, people,” he called.

“在这儿，伙计们。”他叫道。

“We want a word with you,” said Ligur (in a tone of voice intended to imply that “word” was synonymous with “horrifically painful eternity”), and the squat demon pushed open the office door.

“我们要跟你谈谈。”利古尔说。（他说这话的腔调，是有意要把“谈谈”变成“永世痛苦不堪”的代名词。）一个敦实的恶魔推开办公室大门。

“He’s through there,” hissed another voice. “I can feel the slimy little creep.” Ligur.

“他到那边去了。”另一个声音说，“我能感觉到这个滑溜溜的小爬虫。”是利古尔。

Crowley leaned back in his executive chair. He forced himself to relax and failed appallingly.

克鲁利靠在昂贵的座椅上，强迫自己放松，结果彻底失败了。

And on the other hand, you got people like Ligur and Hastur, who took such a dark delight in unpleasantness you might even have mistaken them for human.

但另一方面，也有像利古尔和哈斯塔这样的人。他们会从这些煞风景的事儿里享受到扭曲的快感，有时你甚至会把他们错当成人类。

Drop a lump of sodium in water. Watch it flame and burn and spin around crazily, flaring and sputtering. This was like that; just nastier.

如果你往水里放一小块钠，就可以看到它发热燃烧、疯狂旋转、放射光亮、噼啪作响。眼下的场面就与此类似，只是更加恶心。

The demon peeled and flared and flickered. Oily brown smoke oozed from it, and it screamed and it screamed and it screamed. Then it crumpled, folded in on itself, and what was left lay glistening on the burnt and blackened circle of carpet, looking like a handful of mashed slugs.

利古尔开始闪烁燃烧，肌肤剥落。棕色油烟从他身上汩汩而出，恶魔开始尖叫，尖叫，再尖叫。接着他倒在地上，融成一摊，在地毯焦黑冒火的圆圈中闪着光亮，看上去就像一堆被碾碎的鼻涕虫。

The bucket teetered, then fell neatly on Ligur’s head.

水桶随之歪倒，正好扣在利古尔脑袋上。

“Hi,” said Crowley to Hastur, who had been walking behind Ligur, and had unfortunately not been so much as splashed.

“嗨。”克鲁利跟哈斯塔打了声招呼。他走在利古尔身后，很可惜没被泼到。

There are some things that are unthinkable: there are some depths that not even demons would believe other demons would stoop to.

有些东西是不可想象的：就连恶魔也无法想象其他恶魔会堕落到如此地步。

“… Holy water. You bastard,” said Hastur. “You complete bastard. He hadn’t never done nothing to you.”

“…圣水。你这杂种。”哈斯塔说，“你这彻头彻尾的杂种。他根本没对你做过什么。”

“Yet,” corrected Crowley, who felt a little more comfortable, now the odds were closer to even. Closer, but not yet even, not by a long shot. Hastur was a Duke of Hell. Crowley wasn’t even a local counsellor.

“还没有。”克鲁利更正说。他觉得略微安心，现在两方实力正趋近平衡。趋近，但尚未平衡，还差得很远。哈斯塔是地狱公爵。克鲁利连本地主管都算不上。

“Your fate will be whispered by mothers in dark places to frighten their young,” said Hastur, and then felt that the language of Hell wasn’t up to the job. “You’re going to get taken to the bloody cleaners, pal,” he added.

“在黑暗的疆界中，母亲们会用你的命运来吓唬不乖的孩子。”哈斯塔刚说完就觉得地狱风格的言语不足以表达自己的心情，“我要让你家破人亡，伙计。”他补充说。

Crowley raised the green plastic plant mister, and sloshed it around threateningly. “Go away,” he said. He heard the phone downstairs ringing. Four times, and then the ansaphone caught it. He wondered vaguely who it was.

克鲁利举起绿色塑料喷雾器，威胁地晃了晃。“走开。”他刚说完，就听到楼下的电话铃声响了起来。四声过后，答录机开始工作。他隐隐有些好奇，想知道是谁打来的。

“You don’t frighten me,” said Hastur. He watched a drip of water leak from the nozzle and slide slowly down the side of the plastic container, toward Crowley’s hand.

“你不用吓唬我。”哈斯塔说。他看到一滴水珠从喷嘴渗了出来，顺着塑料容器缓缓滑向克鲁利的手。

“Do you know what this is?” asked Crowley. “This is a Sainsbury’s plant mister, cheapest and most efficient plant mister in the world. It can squirt a fine spray of water into the air. Do I need to tell you what’s in it? It can turn you into that,” he pointed to the mess on the carpet. “Now, go away.”

“你知道这是什么吗？”克鲁利问道，“这是森斯伯瑞超市销售的喷雾器，全世界最廉价最有效的喷雾器。它可以在空中喷出一片很像样的水雾。还用我告诉你里面装的是什么吗？它可以把你变成那样。”克鲁利指了指地毯上那一片狼藉，“现在，快走开。”

Then the drip on the side of the plant mister reached Crowley’s curled fingers, and stopped. “You’re bluffing,” said Hastur.

喷雾器上的水珠碰到了克鲁利弯曲的手指，停在那里。“你在唬我。”哈斯塔说。

“Yes,” said Hastur. And then he smiled. His teeth were too sharp, and his tongue flickered between them. “Do you?”

“不错。”哈斯塔说着露出微笑。他的牙齿很尖，舌头来回伸缩。“你呢？”

“Maybe I am,” said Crowley, in a tone of voice which he hoped made it quite clear that bluffing was the last thing on his mind. “And maybe I’m not. Do you feel lucky?”

“也许是。”克鲁利尽量显出完全不准备唬人的语气，“也许不是。你觉得今天运气如何？”

“Ngh,” said Crowley. Then he said, “Nuh. Got an old friend here.”

“哦。”克鲁利不置可否地说了一声，然后又说，“哦。有个老朋友在。”

Hastur gestured, and the plastic bulb dissolved like rice paper, spilling water all over Crowley’s desk, and all over Crowley’s suit.

哈斯特打了个手势，圆形塑料瓶像米纸一样融化，里面的水全都洒在克鲁利的桌子和衣服上。

“So,” hissed Hastur, “time to go, Crowley.”

“那么。”哈斯塔嘶声说道，“该上路了，克鲁利。”

Aziraphale hung up on him. Crowley wondered what he had wanted.

亚茨拉菲尔挂了电话。克鲁利琢磨着他本来想说什么。

“And that is?” smiled Hastur.

“什么事？”哈斯塔笑着说。

He picked it up, and warned Hastur, “Don’t move. There’s something very important you should know, and I really mean it. Hallo?

他拿起话筒，警告哈斯塔：“不要动。我有件特别重要的事情要告诉你，我是认真的。你好？”

Then the phone on Crowley’s desk rang.

克鲁利办公桌上的电话突然响起。

“I think there’s something you ought to know,” said Crowley, stalling for time.

“我想有件事应该让你知道。”克鲁利为自己争取着时间。

Crowley said nothing. Plan A had worked. Plan B had failed. Everything depended on Plan C, and there was one drawback to this: he had only ever planned as far as B.

克鲁利一言不发。A计划奏效。B计划失败。一切就看C计划了。但这里有问题：他只计划到B。

And suddenly Plan C was there, in his head. He didn’t replace the handset on the receiver. Instead he said, “Okay, Hastur. You’ve passed the test. You’re ready to start playing with the big boys.”

C计划突然跳进他的脑海。克鲁利没有把话筒挂上，而是说：“好的，哈斯塔。你通过考验了。你可以跟大孩子们一起玩了。”

“Have you gone mad?”

“你发疯了吗？”

“Nope. Don’t you understand? This was a test. The Lords of Hell had to know that you were trustworthy before we gave you command of the Legions of the Damned, in the War ahead.”

“不。你还不明白吗？这是一次考验。在我们把恶魔军团交给你、投入即将到来的战争之前，地狱君王们必须证明你有这个能力。”

“Crowley, you are lying, or you are insane, or possibly you are both,” said Hastur, but his certainty was shaken.

“克鲁利，你在撒谎，要不就是发了疯，也可能两者都有。”哈斯塔说，但他的信心已经动摇。

Crowley began to dial a number. “‘S’okay, Duke Hastur. I wouldn’t expect you to believe it from me,” he admitted. “But why don’t we talk to the Dark Council — I am sure that they can convince you.”

克鲁利开始拨一个电话号码。“没关系，哈斯塔公爵。我没指望你会相信我。”他说，“但咱们干吗不跟黑暗议会谈谈呢？我敢保证他们会说服你的。”

Just for a moment he had entertained the possibility; that was where Crowley had got him. It was just possible that Hell was testing him. That Crowley was more than he seemed. Hastur was paranoid, which was simply a sensible and well-adjusted reaction to living in Hell, where they really were all out to get you.

只在刹那之间，哈斯塔把玩了一下这个可能，而这正是克鲁利得手的地方。地狱有可能在考验他。克鲁利也有可能不像表面上那么简单。哈斯塔是个妄想狂，对于生活在地狱的恶魔们来说，这是正常而合理的反应。毕竟在那个地方，所有人都会竭尽全力欺骗你。

The number he had dialed clicked and started to ring.

他拨通那个号码，话筒中传出铃声。

In a tiny fraction of a second, Hastur was gone as well.

仅仅过了几微秒后，哈斯塔也没了踪影。

Over the years a huge number of theological man-hours have been spent debating the famous question:

许多年来，神学家们投入了大量工时来争论这个著名的问题：

And vanished.

话音未落，克鲁利已然消失。

“So long, sucker,” he said.

“再见了，傻瓜。”他说。

How Many Angels Can Dance on the Head of a Pin?

一根针尖上能有多少天使跳舞？

Firstly, angels simply don’t dance. It’s one of the distinguishing characteristics that marks an angel. They may listen appreciatively to the Music of the Spheres, but they don’t feel the urge to get down and boogie to it. So, none.

首先，天使不跳舞。这是天使的标志性特征之一。他们也许会陶醉地聆听天籁，但绝没有跑下场摇摆身体的冲动。所以，答案是零。

In order to arrive at an answer, the following facts must be taken into consideration:

为了得出这个问题的答案，必须把以下事实纳入考量：

So providing the dance was a gavotte, and providing that he had a suitable partner (also able, for the sake of argument, both to gavotte, and to dance it on the head of a pin), the answer is a straightforward one.

所以假设跳的是加伏特舞，再假设他有个合适的舞伴（根据题设要求，必须也会跳加伏特舞，而且能在针尖上跳），答案是简简单单的一。

At least, nearly none. Aziraphale had learned to gavotte in a discreet gentlemen’s club in Portland Place, in the late 1880s, and while he had initially taken to it like a duck to merchant banking, after a while he had become quite good at it, and was quite put out when, some decades later, the gavotte went out of style for good.

至少近乎于零。十九世纪八十年代间，亚茨拉菲尔在伦敦波特兰区一所正儿八经的男士俱乐部学会了加伏特舞步。尽管他一开始笨得像个蹒跚学步的小孩，但没过多久就变得炉火纯青。几十年后加伏特舞步永远退出历史舞台时，他还相当懊恼。

For those of angel stock or demon breed, size, and shape, and composition, are simply options.

对具有天使血统或是恶魔血脉的存在来说，形状、大小和成分都可以随意变换。

And if you put it that way, the answer is, quite a lot actually, providing they abandon their physical bodies, which is a picnic for a demon. Demons aren’t bound by physics. If you take the long view, the universe is just something small and round, like those water-filled balls which produce a miniature snowstorm when you shake them. [Although, unless the ineffable plan is a lot more ineffable than it’s given credit for, it does not have a giant plastic snowman at the bottom.] But if you look from really close up, the only problem about dancing on the head of a pin is all those big gaps between electrons.

如果你这么问的话，那么答案是相当多。当然这要假设他们放弃了自己的肉体，这对恶魔来说是小菜一碟。恶魔不受物理学的限制。如果你从远处看去，就会发现宇宙只是个又小又圆的东西，就好像那种你摇晃两下就能模拟微型暴风雨的灌水玻璃球。（当然，除非不可言喻的计划比人们想象中还要不可言喻得多，否则宇宙球底部肯定不会出现巨大的塑料雪人。）但如果你的视点足够近，就会发现在针尖上跳舞只有一个困难，就是电子间那些大沟壑。

Crowley is currently traveling incredibly fast down a telephone

克鲁利现在正以不可想象的速度沿着电话线移动。

Then again, you might just as well ask how many demons can dance on the head of a pin. They’re of the same original stock, after all. And at least they dance. [Although it’s not what you and I would call dancing. Not good dancing anyway. A demon moves like a white band on “Soul Train.”]

接下来，你也许要问一根针尖上能有多少恶魔跳舞。毕竟他们有着相同的祖先。而且至少恶魔是跳舞的。（尽管那不是你我会称之为舞蹈的东西。不是正经的舞蹈。一个恶魔跳起舞来，就好像出现在黑人音乐大奖上的白人乐队。）

RING.

丁零零。

Crowley went through two telephone exchanges at a very respectable fraction of light-speed. Hastur was a little way behind him: four or five inches, but at that size it gave Crowley a very comfortable lead. One that would vanish, of course, when he came out the other end.

克鲁利以近乎光线的速度通过两部电话交换机。哈斯塔紧追其后，距离也就四五英寸，不过考虑到他们现在的大小，应该说克鲁利领先了很多。当然，等他从另一头出去时，这一差距就会消失。

Hastur was close behind him. Crowley was going to have to time this whole thing very, very carefully.

哈斯塔咬得很紧。克鲁利必须把时机拿捏得特别特别特别准确。

Crowley shot out through the phone line, zapped through the plastic sheathing, and materialized, full-size and out of breath, in his lounge.

克鲁利蹿出电话线，在塑料护套里快速移动，然后具象成原来的大小，喘着粗气出现在他家休息室中。

RING.

丁零零。

RING.

丁零零。

“Wherever you come out, I’ll come out too! You won’t get away!”

“不论你从哪里出去，我也会跟出去！你跑不掉！”

Crowley had traveled through over twenty miles of cable in less than a second.

克鲁利在不到一秒钟的时间内，穿越了二十英里缆线。

RING.

丁零零。

They were too small for sound, but demons don’t necessarily need sound to communicate. He could hear Hastur screaming behind him, “You bastard! I’ll get you. You can’t escape me!”

他们体型太小，无法发出声音，但恶魔进行交流并不需要声音。克鲁利可以听到哈斯塔在他身后声嘶力竭地叫喊：“你这杂种！我会抓到你！你别想逃出我的手心！”

click

咔嗒。

That was the third ring. Well, thought Crowley, here goes nothing. He stopped, suddenly, and watched Hastur shoot past him. Hastur turned and —

这是第三次铃响。好吧，克鲁利心想，反正也不可能更糟了。他突然停住，眼看着哈斯塔从身边蹿了过去。那位地狱公爵转过身…

The outgoing message tape began to turn on his ansaphone. Then there was a beep, and, as the incoming message tape turned, a voice from the speaker screamed, after the beep, “Right! What?… You bloody snake!”

电话答录机中预先录好的磁带开始转动。接着在“嘀”的一声后，留言磁带跟着转动，扬声器中一个声音高叫着：“哈！什么？…你这条该死的蛇！”

He had no time to spare.

他已经没有时间。

The little red message light began to flash.

小小的红色信号灯不住闪烁。

Crowley really wished he had some more holy water and the time to hold the cassette in it until it dissolved. But getting hold of Ligur’s terminal bath had been dangerous enough, he’d had it for years just in case, and even its presence in the room made him uneasy. Or… or maybe… yes, what would happen if he put the cassette in the car? He could play Hastur over and over again, until he turned into Freddie Mercury. No. He might be a bastard, but you could only go so far.

克鲁利真希望还有些圣水，以及把磁带放进去等到溶化的时间。但储存那些为利古尔提供最后一次洗浴服务的圣水已经够危险了，这东西克鲁利存放了很多年，以备不时之需。只要一想到它在这间屋子里，克鲁利就浑身不舒服。或者…或者也许…是的，如果把磁带放进车里会怎么样？他可以一遍又一遍地播放哈斯塔，直到他变成皇后乐队主唱弗雷迪·墨丘利。不。就算他是个杂种，你也不能这么狠。

On and off and on and off, like a tiny, red, angry eye.

明暗，明暗，就像颗愤怒的红色小眼睛。

There was a rumble of distant thunder.

一阵雷声从远方传来。

He went anyway. He ran down to his Bentley and drove toward the West End as if all the demons of hell were after him. Which was more or less the case.

但克鲁利还是出发了。他跑向自己的宾利车，迅速向伦敦西区驶去，就好像地狱中的所有恶魔都在身后追赶。这差不多是真的。

He had nowhere to go.

他也无处可去。

Madame Tracy heard Mr. Shadwell’s slow tread come up the stairs. It was slower than usual, and paused every few steps. Normally he came up the stairs as if he hated every one of them.

特蕾西夫人听到沙德维尔先生慢慢走上楼梯。比平时慢很多，而且每隔两三步就要停顿一下。他平常上楼时，就好像对每级楼梯都恨之入骨。

“Why, Mr. Shadwell,” she said, “whatever have you done to your hand?”

“怎么回事，沙德维尔先生。”她说，“你把自己的手怎么了？”

She managed to grab his arm. He, Shadwell, scourge of evil, was powerless to resist being drawn into her flat.

特蕾西夫人设法抓住他的胳膊。而他，邪恶克星沙德维尔，无力抗拒被她拉进房间的命运。

“Why are you holding it out like that?”

“你干吗老这么伸着手？”

He’d never been in it before, at least in his waking moments. His dreams had furnished it in silks, rich hangings, and what he thought of as scented ungulants. Admittedly, it did have a bead curtain in the entrance to the kitchenette and a lamp made rather inexpertly from a Chianti bottle, because Madame Tracy’s apprehension of what was chic, like Aziraphale’s, had grounded around 1953. And there was a table in the middle of the room with a velvet cloth on it and, on the cloth, the crystal ball which increasingly was Madame Tracy’s means of earning a living.

中士过去从没见过这里的样子，至少醒的时候没见过。他在梦中为这间屋子装饰上华贵的丝质幔帐，还有他自认为是香膏的东西。必须承认，通往厨房的门洞上的确挂着一面珠帘，还有个用葡萄酒瓶做成的简陋灯盏。跟亚茨拉菲尔一样，特蕾西夫人对“别致”这个概念的理解还停留在1953年。房间中央有张桌子，上面铺着天鹅绒桌布，桌布上摆着个水晶球。这东西在特蕾西夫人的谋生手段中占有越来越重要的地位。

“Stand back, I tell ye! I canna be responsible!”

“退后，俺都说了！俺控制不了它！”

She opened her door. He was leaning against the landing wall.

特蕾西夫人打开房门。中士正靠着楼梯平台的墙壁上。

“What on earth has happened to you, Mr. Shadwell?” said Madame Tracy, trying to take his hand.

“真见鬼，你到底撞见什么东西了，沙德维尔先生？”特蕾西夫人说着试图握住他的手。

Shadwell tried to back into the wall.

沙德维尔试图往墙壁里靠。

“Nothing on earth! Nothing on earth!”

“见鬼了！见鬼了！”

“Get away frae me, wumman,” Shadwell groaned. “I dinna know my ane powers!”

“离我远点儿，女人。”沙德维尔呻吟道，“俺完全不晓得自己的能耐！”

“Then I’m sure he’ll know what to do about them,” said Madame Tracy briskly, whose mental picture of what Newt was going through was probably much closer to reality than was Shadwell’s. “And I’m sure he wouldn’t like to think of you getting yourself worked up into a state here. Just you lie down, and I’ll make us both a nice cup of tea.”

“我敢肯定，他知道该怎么对付。”特蕾西夫人笃定地说。跟沙德维尔相比，她想象中牛顿的经历倒更接近现实。“而且我敢说他绝不希望你激动成这个样子。你就乖乖躺好，我会给咱们沏杯茶。”

“I think you could do with a good lie-down, Mr. Shadwell,” she said, in a voice that brooked no argument, and led him on into the bedroom. He was too bewildered to protest.

“我想你应该好好躺一下，沙德维尔先生。”她用不容置疑的语气说道，与此同时把中士领进卧室。沙德维尔此时完全不知所措，甚至没有反抗。

She disappeared in a clacking of bead curtains.

她说完就消失在噼啪作响的珠帘后面。

Madame Tracy’s concepts of what was erotic stemmed from the days when young men grew up thinking that women had beach balls affixed firmly in front of their anatomy, Brigitte Bardot could be called a sex kitten without anyone bursting out laughing, and there really were magazines with names like Girls, Giggles and Garters. Somewhere in this cauldron of permissiveness she had picked up the idea that soft toys in the bedroom created an intimate, coquettish air.

特蕾西夫人脑海中的情色概念来源于很久以前。当时的年轻人还以为女人身体前面都牢牢固定着两个沙滩气球。你可以称碧姬·芭铎为性感小猫，而不会被别人耻笑。而且真有那种名叫“女孩，嬉笑和吊带袜”的杂志。她在这个乱七八糟的大熔炉中获取了一个概念：卧室中的毛绒玩具可以创造一种私密妖娆的氛围。

“But young Newt is out there,” Shadwell muttered, “in thrall to heathen passions and occult wiles.”

“但小牛顿还在塔德菲尔德。”沙德维尔嘟囔道，“被异教狂热和诡秘阴谋折磨。”

Suddenly Shadwell was alone on what he was just capable of recalling, through the wreckage of his shattered nerves, was a bed of sin, and right at this moment was incapable of deciding whether that was in fact better or worse than not being alone on a bed of sin. He turned his head to take in his surroundings.

突然间，屋里只剩沙德维尔独自一人。透过支离破碎的神经系统残骸，他只能想起这是一张罪恶温床。而且此时此刻，他完全无力判断，跟不是独自一人躺在罪恶温床上相比，眼下的情况是好是坏。他转了转脑袋，观察周围的环境。

But recollection kept storming back. He really had done it. No one else in the Army had ever exorcised a demon, as far as he knew. Not Hopkins, not Siftings, not Diceman. Probably not even Witchfinder Company Sergeant Major Narker,* who held the all-time record for most witches found. [The WA enjoyed a renaissance during the great days of Empire expansionism. The British army’s endless skirmishes frequently brought it up against witch-doctors, bone-pointers, shamans, and other occult adversaries. This was the cue for the deployment of the likes of WA CSM Narker, whose striding, bellowing, six-foot-six, eighteen-stone figure, clutching an armor-plated Book, eight-pound Bell, and specially reinforced Candle, could clear the veldt of adversaries faster than a Gatling gun. Cecil Rhodes wrote of him: “Some remote tribes consider him to be a kind of god, and it is an extremely brave or foolhardy witch-doctor who will stand his ground with CSM Narker bearing down on him. I would rather have this man on my side than two battalions of Gurkhas.”] Sooner or later every Army runs across its ultimate weapon and now it existed, Shadwell reflected, on the end of his arm.

回忆纷至沓来。他的确办到了。就沙德维尔所知，猎巫军中还没人成功驱退过魔鬼。霍普金斯没有，希夫廷斯没有，戴斯曼也没有。可能连猎巫军准尉纳克都没有，此人至今还保持着发现巫师数目最多的纪录。（在帝国扩张主义时期，猎巫军曾有过一段复兴。英国军队在永无止境的小规模冲突中，经常会面对巫医、灵媒、萨满和其他拥有超自然能力的敌人。这正是派猎巫军准尉纳克上场的最佳时机。此人身高两米，体重一百三十公斤，每到上阵之时，就会昂首阔步，高声咆哮，手里抓着钢板书、八磅重的铃铛和特别加固的蜡烛，消灭敌军的速度比一挺格特林机枪还快。塞希尔·罗德斯曾这样写道：“某些偏远的部落将他视若神明。在纳克准尉冲锋时，只有特别勇敢或是特别愚蠢的巫医才会与他对抗。有此人在我们一方，比两个军的尼泊尔士兵都强。”）每支军队早晚都会发现自己的终极武器，沙德维尔心想，此刻它就在自己的胳膊末端。

Shadwell stared for some time at a large, threadbare teddy bear, which had one eye missing and a torn ear. It probably had a name like Mr. Buggins.

沙德维尔盯着一个破破烂烂的大泰迪熊看了半天，这东西已经缺了一只眼睛，少了半个耳朵，很可能拥有类似巴金斯先生之类的姓名。

“Urg,” he said.

“呃。”他说。

He turned his head the other way. His gaze was blocked by a pajama case shaped like an animal that may have been a dog but, there again, might have been a skunk. It had a cheery grin.

中士又把头转到另一个方向。他的视线被一个动物形状的睡裤箱挡住。它脸上挂着快乐的笑容，可能是狗，但也可能是臭鼬。

Although Madame Tracy was by many yardsticks quite stupid, she had an instinct in certain matters, and when it came to dabbling in the occult her reasoning was faultless. Dabbling, she’d realized, was exactly what her customers wanted. They didn’t want to be shoved in it up to their necks. They didn’t want the multi-planular mysteries of Time and Space, they just wanted to be reassured that Mother was getting along fine now she was dead. They wanted just enough Occult to season the simple fare of their lives, and preferably in portions no longer than forty-five minutes, followed by tea and biscuits.

尽管从很多角度来看，特蕾西夫人相当愚蠢，但她对某些问题有着与生俱来的直觉。只要涉足神秘领域，她的逻辑就无懈可击。特蕾西夫人早就意识到，顾客们想要的正是“涉足”。他们不希望有那种完全置身其中的感觉，也不想听多元时空的奥秘。他们只想知道妈妈死后过得还好。他们只需要足够的神秘体验，来为单调的日常生活调味，而且每次不要超过四十五分钟，其后最好能供应茶水和小点心。

When Madame Tracy brought the tea in he was snoring. She tactfully closed the door, and rather thankfully as well, because she had a seance due in twenty minutes and it was no good turning down money these days.

特蕾西夫人把茶水端进来时，中士已经开始打鼾。她轻轻关上房门，长出了一口气。因为二十分钟后，她还有场降神会要办，这年头拒绝收入可不是什么好主意。

Well, screw No First Use. He’d have a bit of a rest, seeing as he was here, and then the Powers of Darkness had met their match at last…

好吧，去他的“不首先使用大规模杀伤性武器”原则。既然已经到了这里，他可以先休息一下，然后黑暗势力就末日临头了…

They certainly didn’t want odd candles, scents, chants, or mystic runes. Madame Tracy had even removed most of the Major Arcana from her Tarot card pack, because their appearance tended to upset people.

他们绝对不需要古怪的蜡烛、香气、吟唱，或是神秘符记。特蕾西夫人甚至从她的塔罗牌里抽掉了大部分大阿尔克纳牌，因为它们的出现老是让客人沮丧。

And she made sure that she had always put sprouts on to boil just before a seance. Nothing is more reassuring, nothing is more true to the comfortable spirit of English occultism, than the smell of Brussels sprouts cooking in the next room.

另外，她总会确保在降神会前煮上一锅甘蓝。什么东西都不如隔壁传来的煮甘蓝味更令人安心，更符合英国神秘主义的舒适精神。

It was early afternoon, and the heavy storm clouds had turned the sky the color of old lead. It would rain soon, heavily, blindingly. The firemen hoped the rain would come soon. The sooner the better.

正午刚过，浓重的暴雨云已经把天空染成旧石墨的颜色。很快就要下雨了，滂沱淋漓的倾盆大雨。消防员们希望赶快下雨。越快越好。

They had arrived fairly promptly, and the younger firemen were dashing around excitedly, unrolling their hosepipe and flexing their axes; the older firemen knew at a glance that the building was a dead loss, and weren’t even sure that the rain would stop it spreading to neighboring buildings, when a black Bentley skidded around the corner and drove up onto the pavement at a speed somewhere in excess of sixty miles per hour, and stopped with a screech of brakes half an inch away from the wall of the bookshop. An extremely agitated young man in dark glasses got out and ran toward the door of the blazing bookshop.

他们很快赶到了这里，年轻的消防员们展开水管，拿起消防斧，激动地来回乱转。而年长的消防员们一眼就看出这房子已经没救了，甚至不敢确定大雨能否阻止火势蔓延到临近的建筑上去。一辆黑色宾利车突然拐进这条街，以超过六十英里的时速蹿上便道，发出刺耳的刹车声，最终停在距离书店墙壁半英寸远的地方。一个戴墨镜的年轻人特别激动地跳出车，冲向燃烧的大门。

“Are you the owner of this establishment?” asked the fireman.

“你是这所房子的主人吗？”消防员说。

He was intercepted by a fireman.

他被一位消防员挡了下来。

“I really wouldn’t know about that, sir. Appearances can be very deceptive. For example, I am a fireman. However, upon meeting me socially, people unaware of my occupation often suppose that I am, in fact, a chartered accountant or company director. Imagine me out of uniform, sir, and what kind of man would you see before you? Honestly?”

“这很难说，先生。外表很会骗人。比方说，我是个消防员。但如果是在社交场合，不了解我的人通常会把我当成注册会计师或是公司主管。想象一下我不穿制服的样子，先生，你觉得眼前站着的是什么人？说实话。”

This sounds easier than it actually was, since in order to manage it Crowley needed to avoid half a dozen firemen, two policemen, and a number of interesting Soho night people, [In any other place than Soho it is quite possible that spectators at a fire might have been interested.] out early, and arguing heatedly amongst themselves about which particular section of society had brightened up the afternoon, and why.

实际上没有说起来这么简单。为了达到这个目的，克鲁利需要躲开半打消防员、两个警察和一群饶有兴趣的苏活区夜游人。（在苏活区以外的地方，观赏火灾的人很可能会变成别人观赏的对象。）他们出来早了，正激烈争论着今天下午最出风头的是哪些家伙，以及个中原因。

Crowley pushed straight through them. They scarcely spared him a glance.

克鲁利从他们中间挤了过去。这些人看都没看他一眼。

“Don’t be stupid! Do I look like I run a bookshop?”

“别傻了！你看我像经营书店的人吗？”

“A prat,” said Crowley, and he ran into the bookshop.

“一个大傻瓜。”克鲁利说着冲进书店。

No answer. Just the crackle of burning paper, the splintering of glass as the fire reached the upstairs rooms, the crash of collapsing timbers.

没人回答。只有纸张燃烧的噼啪声、火焰到达二楼房间造成的玻璃破裂声，以及木材断裂的倒塌声。

Then he pushed open the door, and stepped into an inferno.

他推开房门，踏入地狱烈火。

In the far corner a bookshelf toppled over, cascading flaming books across the floor. The fire was all around him, and Crowley ignored it. His left trouser leg began to smolder; he stopped it with a glance.

在房间对面的角落里，一个书架倒塌下来，将着火的书籍撒满地板。克鲁利周围全是烈焰，但他没有理会。左边的裤腿开始冒烟，恶魔瞥了一眼，把火止住。

He scanned the shop urgently, desperately, looking for the angel, looking for help.

克鲁利在店铺中搜索，焦急而绝望地寻觅天使，寻觅帮助。

“Hello? Aziraphale! For Go –, for Sa –, for somebody’s sake! Aziraphale!”

“嗨？亚茨拉菲尔！看在上…看在撒…看在随便什么人的分儿上！亚茨拉菲尔！”

The whole bookshop was ablaze. “Aziraphale!” he called. “Aziraphale, you — you stupid Aziraphale? Are you here?”

整个书店都在燃烧。“亚茨拉菲尔！”他叫道，“亚茨拉菲尔，你…你这蠢货…亚茨拉菲尔？你在这儿吗？”

His shades flew to a far corner of the room, and became a puddle of burning plastic. Yellow eyes with slitted vertical pupils were revealed. Wet and steaming, face ash-blackened, as far from cool as it was possible for him to be, on all fours in the blazing bookshop, Crowley cursed Aziraphale, and the ineffable plan, and Above, and Below.

他的墨镜飞到屋子对面，变成一摊燃烧的塑料。一双黄眼睛显露出来，狭窄的瞳仁竖在当中。克鲁利浑身湿透，冒着水气，面目灰黑，四肢着地趴在燃烧的店铺中，可以说不酷到了极点。他咒骂着亚茨拉菲尔，还有那不可言喻的计划，以及上界和下界。

The shop window was smashed from outside. Crowley turned, startled, and an unexpected jet of water struck him full in the chest, knocking him to the ground.

店铺的窗户被人从外面撞破。克鲁利转过身，愣了一下，突如其来的水柱正好打在他的胸口，把恶魔冲倒在地。

Outside, the passersby were being herded back by the police, and a fireman was explaining to anyone who would listen, “I couldn’t stop him. He must have been mad. Or drunk. Just ran in. I couldn’t stop him. Mad. Ran straight in. Horrible way to die. Horrible, horrible. Just ran straight in…

书店外面，围观者已经被警察疏导到远处。一名消防员正向任何肯听他说话的人唠叨：“我阻止不了他。他肯定是疯了。要不就是醉了。就那么跑进去。我阻止不了他。疯了。直接跑进去。真是可怕的死法。可怕，可怕。就那么跑进去…”

Then he looked down, and saw it. The book. The book that the girl had left in the car in Tadfield, on Wednesday night. It was slightly scorched around the cover, but miraculously unharmed. He picked it up, stuffed it into his jacket pocket, stood up, unsteadily, and brushed himself off.

接着他低下头，看到了那本书。星期三晚上，塔德菲尔德的女孩丢在车上的书。封面略有些焦黑，但却没有其他损伤，这简直是奇迹。克鲁利捡起书，塞进夹克口袋，摇摇晃晃地站起身，掸了掸身上的灰土。

The floor above him collapsed. With a roar and gargantuan shrug the building fell in on itself, in a rain of brick and timber and flaming debris.

他头上的天花板掉了下来。建筑物先是一耸，继而完全倒塌，发出一阵咆哮，砖石木板和燃烧的碎片坠落如雨。

Then Crowley came out of the flames.

克鲁利从火焰中走了出来。

They stared at the car as it sped away. Finally one policeman spoke. “Weather like this, he ought to of put his lights on,” he said, numbly.

人们看着车子迅速驶远。终于有一名警察说话了：“这样的天气，他应该打开车灯。”他木讷地说。

The police and the firemen looked at him, saw the expression on his face, and stayed exactly where they were.

警察和消防员们盯着他，看到他脸上的表情，全都愣在原地一动不动。

He climbed into the Bentley and reversed back into the road, swung around a fire truck, into Wardour Street, and into the darkened afternoon.

他钻进宾利车，倒上大路，绕过一辆消防车，驶上华都街，融入午后渐黑的天色。

“Especially driving like that. Could be dangerous,” agreed another, in flat, dead tones, and they all stood there in the light and the heat of the burning bookshop, wondering what was happening to a world they had thought they understood.

“尤其是像这样开车。可能会有危险。”另一个人用呆板的腔调说。他们在火场的光热之中，思忖着原以为熟悉的现实世界到底出了什么问题。

It was ten past one in the afternoon and it was dark and humid and wet. The motorway was almost deserted, and the woman in red roared down the road on her red motorbike, smiling lazily.

此刻是下午一点十分，天色阴沉，湿度很大。高速路上几乎没有人烟，一身火红的女子骑着红色摩托车在路上奔驰，脸上露出慵懒的笑容。

There was a flash of lightning, blue-white, strobing across the cloud-black sky, a crack of thunder so loud it hurt, and a hard rain began to fall.

一道蓝白色的闪电划破黑云堆积的天空，随之而来的雷声震耳欲聋，一场豪雨终于落下。

She rode a red motorbike. Not a friendly Honda red; a deep, bloody red, rich and dark and hateful. The bike was apparently, in every other respect, ordinary except for the sword, resting in its scabbard, set onto the side of the bike.

她骑着一辆红摩托。不是本田车那种友善的红色，而是深沉如血的红，丰厚、黑暗，充满恨意。总的来看，这辆车显得普普通通，但有柄插在鞘中的长剑就挂在一边。

Her helmet was crimson, and her leather jacket was the color of old wine. In ruby studs on the back were picked out the words HELL’S ANGELS.

她的头盔是深红色，皮夹克是陈酒的颜色。背后宝石红色的钮钉排列出了四个大字：地狱天使。

It had been a good day so far. There was something about the sight of a beautiful woman on a powerful motorbike with a sword stuck on the back that had a powerful effect on a certain type of man. So far four traveling salesmen had tried to race her, and bits of Ford Sierra now decorated the crash barriers and bridge supports along forty miles of motorway.

今天到目前为止还算不错。背后挂着长剑的美丽女子，骑在一辆动力强劲的摩托车上，这个场面对某些人来说很有吸引力。已经有四位旅行推销员试图跟她飙车，福特塞拉车的碎片点缀在六十公里内的各处防撞栏和桥梁支柱上。

The audience were saying things like:

那群人说着类似这样的话：

She pulled up at a service area, and went into the Happy Porker Cafe. It was almost empty. A bored waitress was darning a sock behind the counter, and a knot of black-leathered bikers, hard, hairy, filthy, and huge, were clustered around an even taller individual in a black coat. He was resolutely playing something that in bygone years would have been a fruit machine, but now had a video screen, and advertised itself as TRIVIA SCRABBLE.

她把车停在一处路边服务区，走进“快乐小猪咖啡厅”。里面几乎没人，一位无聊的女服务生正在柜台后面织袜子。几个高大肮脏、满脸胡碴儿的粗豪汉子，穿着一水儿的黑皮衣，围在一个身材更高、穿着黑外套的人周围。那人正全神贯注地玩一台游戏机。要搁在往年，这东西会是台老虎机，但现在它有了一个显示屏，并被冠以“常识问答机”的名号。

“It’s ‘D’! Press ‘D’– The Godfather must’vegot more Oscars than Gone With the Wind!”

“是D！按D！《教父》获得的奥斯卡奖肯定比《飘》多！”

“1666!”

“1666！”

“Puppet on a String! Sandie Shaw! Honest. I’m bleeding positive!”

“珊蒂·萧！《提线木偶》！我他妈绝对肯定！”

“No, you great pillock! That was the fire! The Plague was 1665!”

“不，你这大笨瓜！那是伦敦大火的年份！瘟疫是1665！”

“It’s ‘B’– the Great Wall of China wasn’t one of the Seven Wonders of the world!”

“是B！万里长城不是世界七大奇迹之一！”

There were four options: Pop Music, Sport, Current Events, and General Knowledge. The tall biker, who had kept his helmet on, was pressing the buttons, to all intents and purposes oblivious of his supporters. At any rate, he was consistently winning.

游戏机中有四个选项：流行音乐、体育、时事和常识。那位高大的摩托车手，始终戴着头盔，完全没有理会周围的支持者，全神贯注地拍下按键。反正他一直在赢。

“Twenty? Nah, s’never twenty… Oh. It was. Well, I never.”

“二十？不，没有二十…哦。真是二十。好吧，我不知道。”

“It’s random wossit, selection, innit. I mean they do it with microchips. It’s probably got, like, millions of different subjects in there, in its RAM.” He had FISH across his right-hand knuckle, and CHIP on the left.

“类型是随机选择的，不是吗？我是说他们用芯片来实现这个功能。这里面可能有，比方说数百万个不同主题，都在它的存储器里。”他右手指关节上刺着“炸鱼”，左手则是“薯条”。

The second-shortest biker, Pigbog (6′ 3″), whispered to the shortest, Greaser (6′ 2″): “What happened to ‘Sport’, then?” He had LOVE tattooed on one set of knuckles, HATE on the other.

倒数第二矮的骑手猪粪（一米九）对最矮的“暴走族”（一米八七）低声说：“体育怎么没了？”他左手指关节上的刺青凑成了一个“爱”字，而右手则是“恨”。

“Thass a new one, ‘How many times has England been officially at war with France since 1066?”‘

“这个从没见过。自1066年以来英国和法国共有多少次正式交锋？”

“Ah,” she said, biting through some wool. “Well, you’re better off waiting in here. It’s hell out there.”

“哦。”服务生说着咬断一根毛线，“嗯，你最好在这里等。外面简直是地狱。”

She could hear the Trivia Scrabblers in the background.

她能听到背后那些玩游戏的人还在吵嚷。

The red rider went over to the counter.

红衣骑手走到柜台前。

“No,” she told her. “Not yet.”

“不。”红衣人对她说，“还不是。”

“A cup of tea, please. And a cheese sandwich,” she said.

“一杯茶，谢谢。再来一份干酪三明治。”她说。

She picked a window table, with a good view of the parking lot, and she waited.

她选了张靠窗的桌子，那里可以把停车场尽收眼底，然后坐下来，耐心等待。

“Waiting for friends.”

“在等朋友。”

“American war with Mexico? I know that. It’s June 1845. ‘D’– see! I tol’ you!”

“美国同墨西哥战争？这个我知道。是1845年6月。D。看！我就说！”

“You on your own, then, dear?” asked the waitress, passing the tea, and something white and dry and hard, across the counter.

“就你一个人吗，亲爱的？”女服务生把茶水和某种又干又硬的白色物体从柜台上推了过来。

“Why?” Greaser had never thought of Pigbog as being a Bible trivia freak.

“为什么？”暴走族没想到猪粪会是个《圣经》怪人。

“Pop Music, Current Events, General Knowledge, and War. It’s just I’ve never seen ‘War’ before. That’s why I mentioned it.” Pigbog cracked his knuckles, loudly, and pulled the ring tab on a can of beer. He swigged back half a can, belched carelessly, then sighed. “I just wish they’d do more bleeding Bible questions.”

“流行音乐、时事、常识和战争。我原来没见过‘战争’。所以才会问你。”猪粪捏了捏拳头，关节发出很响的噼啪声。他拉开一听啤酒的拉环，一口喝下半罐，满不在乎地打了个酒嗝儿，然后叹口气说，“我只希望他们能多出点该死的《圣经》问答。”

“‘Cos, well, you remember that bit of bother in Brighton?”

“因为，哦，你还记得在布赖顿码头的那件小麻烦吗？”

“Oh, yeah. You was on Crimewatch,” said Greaser, with a trace of envy.

“哦，当然，你上了BBC的《案件观察》节目。”暴走族有点嫉妒地说。

“Well, I had to hang out in that hotel where me mam worked, dinni? Free months. And nothin’ to read, only this bugger Gideon had left his Bible behind. It kind of sticks in your mind.”

“对，我不得不待在我妈妈工作的那所酒店里，对吧？好几个月啊。完全没东西可看，只有那个操蛋吉迪恩[4]留在屋里的《圣经》。那些东西就好像粘在了我的脑袋里。”【注：[4]他是各教派和国际社会的成员，以把《圣经》放在旅馆的房间里而闻名。】

Another motorbike, jet black and gleaming, drew up in the carpark outside.

一辆乌黑发亮的摩托车停在门外的停车场里。

The door to the cafe opened. A blast of cold wind blew through the room; a man dressed all in black leather, with a short black beard, walked over to the table, sat next to the woman in red, and the bikers around the video scrabble machine suddenly noticed how hungry they all were, and deputed Skuzz to go and get them something to eat. All of them except the player, who said nothing, just pressed the buttons for the right answers and let his winnings accumulate in the tray at the bottom of the machine.

咖啡馆的房门被推开。一股凉风吹过房间，一个身穿黑皮衣、留黑色短须的男人走了进来，直接坐到红衣女子身边。围在问答机周围的骑手们突然意识到自己饿得要死，便打发“油泥”去给他们搞些吃的来。但玩游戏的大高个儿仍旧一言不发，只是不断按下正确答案，让机器底部托盘中的战利品不断增加。

“We don’t have birthdays.”

“咱们没有生日。”

“Funny?”

“怪怪的？”

“Well, you know. When you’ve spent all these thousands of years waiting for the big day, and it finally comes. Like waiting for Christmas. Or birthdays.”

“嗯，你明白吧？数千年来，你一直在期待这个大日子，如今它终于来到了。就像期待圣诞节。或是过生日。”

“I thought we had some, but we don’t,” said the woman.)

“我本以为还有些，但确实没了。”女服务生说。）

“I haven’t seen you since Mafeking,” said Red. “How’s it been going?”

“自从马弗京[5]之后，我就没见过你了。”红衣人说，“最近怎么样？”【注：[5]马弗京位于南非博普塔茨瓦纳附近，曾作为英属贝专纳（现在的博茨瓦纳）的行政首府长达八十年之久。1895年，英国殖民者曾从这里发动对德兰士瓦布尔共和国的奇袭，进而导致1899年的南非战争爆发。】

“Feels funny, all of us finally getting together like this,” said Red.

“感觉怪怪的，咱们所有人最终聚在这里。”红衣人说。

“I’ve been keeping pretty busy,” said Black. “Spent a lot of time in America. Brief world tours. Just killing time, really.”

“一直挺忙的。”黑衣人说，“在美国待了很久。还有短期环球旅行。不过也就是消磨时间罢了。”

(“What do you mean, you’ve got no steak and kidney pies?” asked Skuzz, affronted.

（“你这话是什么意思？没有牛排和腰子馅饼？”油泥气鼓鼓地问。

“I didn’t say we do. I just said that was what it was like.”

“我没说咱们有，只是打个比方。”

(“Actually,” admitted the woman, “it doesn’t look like we’ve got anything left at all. Except that slice of pizza.”

（“实际上，”女招待说，“似乎我们这里什么都没剩下。除了几片比萨。”

“Has it got anchovies on it?” asked Skuzz gloomily. None of the chapter liked anchovies. Or olives.

“上面加了凤尾鱼吗？”油泥郁闷地问道。他们几个都不喜欢凤尾鱼和橄榄。

“Yes, dear. It’s anchovy and olives. Would you like it?”

“加了，亲爱的。加了凤尾鱼和橄榄。你想来点吗？”

Skuzz shook his head sadly. Stomach rumbling, he made his way back to the game. Big Ted got irritable when he got hungry, and when Big Ted got irritable everyone got a slice.)

油泥难过地摇摇头。他走回游戏机旁，肚子饿得咕咕直叫。大特德一饿起来就爱生气。大特德一生气，所有人都没好果子吃。）

A new category had come up on the video screen. You could now answer questions about Pop Music, Current Events, Famine, or War. The bikers seemed marginally less informed about the Irish Potato Famine of 1846, the English everything famine of 1315, and the 1969 dope famine in San Francisco than they had been about War, but the player was still racking up a perfect score, punctuated occasionally by a whir, ratchet, and chink as the machine disgorged pound coins into its tray.

又有一类新题目出现在屏幕上。你现在可以从流行音乐、时事、饥荒和战争中选择。飞车党们对于饥荒似乎不如对战争那么熟悉。无论是1846年爱尔兰土豆匮乏、1315年英国一切食物匮乏，还是1969年旧金山大麻匮乏，他们都不知道。但那位玩家仍然保持着完美得分记录，机器把代币吐进托盘，不时发出嗖嗖、噼啪和叮当的声音。

Black shrugged. “A few hundred miles.”

黑衣人耸耸肩。“几百英里吧。”

“Weather looks a bit tricky down south,” said Red.

“南方的天气看起来有点棘手。”红衣人说。

“I thought it’d be longer, somehow. All that waiting, just for a few hundred miles.”

“我本来觉着会更长些。等了这么久，就为了这几百英里。”

Red looked at her nails. “That’s good. It wouldn’t be the same if we didn’t have a good thunderstorm. Any idea how far we’ve got to ride?”

红衣人看着自己的指甲。“那就好。如果没有一场大暴雨作背景，感觉总是差点儿什么。你知道咱们要骑多远吗？”

“It’s not the traveling,” said Black. “It’s the arriving that matters.”

“旅程不是目的。”黑衣人说，“到达才是关键。”

Black squinted at the darkening clouds. “No. Looks fine to me. We’ll have a thunderstorm along any minute.”

黑衣人眯起眼睛看了看愈加黑沉的浓云。“不。在我看来还不错。随时都有可能下暴雨。”

There was a roar outside. It was the roar of a motorbike with a defective exhaust, untuned engine, leaky carburetor. You didn’t have to see the bike to imagine the clouds of black smoke it traveled in, the oil slicks it left in its wake, the trail of small motorbike parts and fittings that littered the roads behind it.

门外传来一阵轰鸣。这是那种排气管有问题，引擎没调整好，化油器还在漏油的摩托车发出的轰鸣。你不用亲眼看见，就能想象出它跑起来会喷出浓浓黑烟，所到之处浮油流满地，零件撒一路。

“Yeah. Same year as Bing Crosby.”

“没错。跟平·克劳斯贝一样。”

“And Marc Bolan. He was dead good. Press ‘D,’ then. Go on.”

“还有祖雷克斯龙乐队主将马克·博兰。他也死了。按D。继续。”

The cafe door opened. A young man in dusty white leathers entered, and the wind blew empty crisp packets and newspapers and ice cream wrappers in with him. They danced around his feet like excited children, then fell exhausted to the floor.

咖啡馆的房门打开。一个白皮衣上沾满尘灰的年轻人走了进来，冷风把空薯片袋、旧报纸和冰淇淋包装一同吹进房间。它们像兴奋的孩子似的，在年轻人脚下舞动旋转，最终精疲力竭地落在地上。

“Four of you, are there, dear?” asked the woman. She was trying to find some clean cups and tea spoons — the entire rack seemed suddenly to have been coated in a light film of motor oil and dried egg.

“你们有四个人，是吗，亲爱的？”女招待问道。她试图找些干净杯子和茶匙，但整个餐架似乎突然盖上了薄薄一层机油和干蛋黄。

“Four teas, please,” he said. “One black.”

“四杯茶，谢谢。”她说，“一杯要红茶。”

“There will be,” said the man in black, and he took the teas and went back to the table, where his two comrades waited.

“会有的。”红衣人说着接过茶杯，走回桌前，白衣青年已经坐在那里。

“Nah. ‘D.’ 1976. I’m positive.”

“不对。D.1976。我敢肯定。”

“Elvis Presley? ‘Sgotta be ‘C’– it was 1977 he snuffed it, wasn’t it?”

“猫王埃尔维斯·普雷斯利？应该是C。他是1977年挂的，对吧？”

Black went up to the counter.

红衣人走到柜台前。

They shook their heads.

另外两人摇摇头。

“Any sign of him?” said the boy in white.

“有他的消息吗？”白衣人问。

An argument had broken out around the video screen (current categories showing on the screen were War, Famine, Pollution, and Pop Trivia 1962–1979).

游戏机旁爆发了一场争论。现在屏幕上显示的类别已经变成战争、饥荒、污染和1962—1979年流行小事。

The tall man walked over to the table, leaving the astonished bikers, and his winnings, behind him. I NEVER WENT AWAY, he said, and his voice was a dark echo from the night places, a cold slab of sound, gray, and dead. If that voice was a stone it would have had words chiseled on it a long time ago: a name, and two dates.

高个儿男子走到桌前，把不知所措的飞车党和自己的战利品留在身后。我从未离开，他说。这个声音仿佛是从暗夜疆域传来的黑暗回响，阴暗冰冷，死气沉沉。如果这声音是块石头，那它肯定很早以前就刻上了铭文：一个名字，两个日期。

The bikers around the game were getting progressively baffled by this exchange. Led by Big Ted, they shambled over to the table and stared at the four strangers.

这些对话让围在游戏机旁的飞车党们越来越糊涂。他们在大特德的带领下，摇摇摆摆走到桌前，盯着四个陌生人。

The three people at the table turned as one. Red spoke. “When did you get here?” she asked.

坐在桌边的三个人同时转过头来。红衣人说：“你什么时候到的？”

The tall figure made no motion to press any of the buttons.

但高个儿玩家一动不动，没有去按键的意思。

I DON’T CARE WHAT IT SAYS, said the tall biker in the helmet, I NEVER LAID A FINGER ON HIM.

我不在乎这上面怎么说，戴头盔的高个儿骑手说，我没碰过他一根指头。

“It’s been a long time,” said War.

“真是过了好久。”战争说。

There was a flash of lightning, almost immediately followed by a low rumble of thunder.

一道闪电划破天空，低沉的闷雷声几乎同时响起。

“Woss the matter with you?” asked Big Ted, irritably. “Go on. Press ‘D.’ Elvis Presley died in 1976.”

“你怎么回事啊？”大特德急躁地说，“继续。按D。猫王是1976年死的。”

“Lovely weather for it,” said Pollution.

“天气很适合今天的活动。”污染说。

“Your tea’s getting cold, lord,” said Famine.

“你的茶要凉了，阁下。”饥荒说。

YES.

是的。

“You’re Hell’s Angels, then?” asked Big Ted, sarcastically. If there’s one thing real Hell’s Angels can’t abide, it’s weekend bikers. [There are a number of other things real Hell’s Angels can’t abide. These include the police, soap, Ford Cortinas, and, in Big Ted’s case, anchovies and olives.]

“这么说，你们是地狱天使的人？”大特德讽刺道。如果说有什么东西是真正的地狱天使不能容忍的，那就是周末出来休闲的摩托车手。（还有些东西真正的地狱天使也不能容忍。其中包括警察、肥皂和福特千里马越野车，另外对大特德来说，还有凤尾鱼和橄榄。）

“What chapter are you from, then?”

“你们是哪个堂口的？”

The four strangers nodded.

四个陌生人点点头。

The Tall Stranger looked at Big Ted. Then he stood up. It was a complicated motion; if the shores of the seas of night had deckchairs, they’d open up something like that.

最高的陌生人看着大特德，站了起来。这是个很复杂的动作。如果夜幕下的海滩上有把折叠椅，它们展开的样子应该与此类似。

It did not escape their notice that all four strangers had HELL’S ANGELS on their jackets. And they looked dead dodgy as far as the Angels were concerned: too clean for a start; and none of the four looked like they’d ever broken anyone’s arm just because it was Sunday afternoon and there wasn’t anything good on the telly. And one was a woman, too, only not ridin’ around on the back of someone’s bike but actually allowed one of her own, like she had any right to it.

他们注意到这四个人的夹克上都有“地狱天使”的字样。但这些人看起来一点不像地狱天使：首先是太干净，而且都不像是因为周日下午电视里没好节目就出去打折别人胳膊的主儿。甚至还有个女人，不是坐在别人摩托车的后座上，而是自己骑一辆车，就好像她真有这个权利。

He seemed to be unfolding himself forever.

他似乎永远都在伸展。

He wore a dark helmet, completely hiding his features. And it was made of that weird plastic, Big Ted noted. Like, you looked in it, and all you could see was your own face.

这人戴着黑色头盔，完全盖住了面目。而且大特德注意到头盔是用古怪的塑料材质制成的，你在那上面只能看到自己的脸。

REVELATIONS, he said. CHAPTER SIX.

《启示录》，他说，第六章。

“Verses two to eight,” added the boy in white, helpfully.

“第二段到第八段。”白衣男孩好心地补充说。

Big Ted glared at the four of them. His lower jaw began to protrude, and a little blue vein in his temple started to throb. “Wossat mean then?” he demanded.

大特德瞪着四个人。他的下巴慢慢向前探出，太阳穴上的青筋开始跳动。“这是什么意思？”他喝问道。

“I think He may be along in a minute,” said Pigbog urgently. “He’s probably looking for somewhere to park his bike. Let’s go and, and join a youf club or somethin’…”

“我想他可能快来了。”猪粪急切地说，“他大概正在找地方停摩托呢。咱们走吧，找个青年俱乐部什么的…”

There was a tug at his sleeve. It was Pigbog. He had gone a peculiar shade of gray, under the dirt.

有人揪了下他的袖子。是猪粪。尽管盖着一层污垢，但还是可以看出他的脸色有点苍白。

And then the tall stranger reached up a pale motorbike gauntlet, and raised the visor of his helmet, and Big Ted found himself wishing, for the first time in his existence, that he’d lived a better life.

高个儿陌生人抬起戴着白色摩托手套的右手，打开头盔上的面罩。大特德有生以来头一次希望自己曾过上更体面的生活。

“It means we’re in trouble,” said Pigbog.

“意思是说咱们有麻烦了。”猪粪说。

“Jesus Christ!” he moaned.

“基督耶稣！”他呻吟道。

But Big Ted’s invincible ignorance was his shield and armor. He didn’t move.

但大特德的顽愚正是他的盔甲和盾牌。他没挪地方。

“Others promise,” he said, “we deliver.”

“别人应许。”他说，“我们传达。”

“That’s us, Big Ted,” she said. “The real McCoy.”

“是我们，大特德。”她说。“货真价实。”

Big Ted looked at the fourth Horseman. “‘Ere, I seen you before,” he said. “You was on the cover of that Blue Oyster Cult album. An’ I got a ring wif your… your… your head on it.”

大特德看着第四个骑士。“呃，我以前见过你。”他说，“你就在蓝贝党的唱片封面上。我还有个戒指，上面有你…你的…你的头像。”

Pollution removed his helmet and shook out his long white hair. He had taken over when Pestilence, muttering about penicillin, had retired in 1936. If only the old boy had known what opportunities the future had held…

污染摘下头盔，晃了晃白色长发。1936年，他接了瘟疫的班。那老家伙退休时嘴里还不停念叨着青霉素。如果老家伙知道未来会提供怎样的机会…

The storm raged around the quarry. The rope with the old car tire on it danced in the gale. Sometimes a sheet of iron, relic of an attempt at a tree house, would shake loose from its insubstantial moorings and sail away.

风暴在采掘场周围肆虐。系着旧轮胎的绳子在狂风中飘舞。“他们”尝试修建树屋时留下了一堆钢板，此刻不时会有一片从不牢靠的存放处挣脱出来，向远方飞去。

War flipped him a lazy salute.

战争冲他懒洋洋地敬了个礼。

The Them huddled together, staring at Adam. He seemed bigger, somehow. Dog sat and growled. He was thinking of all the smells he would lose. There were no smells in Hell, apart from the sulphur. While some of them here, were, were… well, the fact was, there were no bitches in hell either.

“他们”抱成一团，盯着亚当。不知为何，他显得高大了些。狗狗坐在地上，低声咕噜。他回忆着将要失去的所有味道。地狱里除了硫黄以外，没有别的气味。而且这里有些东西是，是…好吧，实话实说，地狱里也没有母狗。

“Cor.” Big Ted’s big face screwed up with the effort of thought.

“啊。”大特德努力思考，大脸都随之扭曲。

I GET EVERYWHERE.

我无所不在。

Famine nodded. “The Old Firm,” he said.

饥荒点点头。“千年老号。”他说。

“Cor,” he said. “Hell’s Angels.”

“靠。”他说，“地狱天使。”

“Wot kind of bike you ridin’?” he said.

“你们骑哪种摩托？”他问。

“But — but who — who’ll do the, you know, all the cooking and washing and suchlike?” quavered Brian.

“但…但谁…谁去做那些，你知道，煮饭洗衣服什么的？”布赖恩颤声问道。

“No one’ll have to do any of that stuff,” said Adam. “You can have all the food you like, loads of chips, fried onion rings, anything you like. An’ never have to wear any new clothes or have a bath if you don’t want to or anything. Or go to school or anything. Or do anything you don’t want to do, ever again. It’ll be wicked!”

“谁都不用干这些事。”亚当说，“你想吃什么就有什么，薯片、炸洋葱圈，什么都有。而且只要你不愿意，就再也不用穿新衣服或是洗澡什么的。或者去学校什么的。你不想干的事儿，就再也不用干。简直酷毙了！”

The moon came up over the Kookamundi Hills. It was very bright tonight.

月亮爬上库卡曼迪山。今晚的月光十分明亮。

Johnny Two Bones sat in the red basin of the desert. It was a sacred place, where two ancestral rocks, formed in the Dream-time, lay as they had since the beginning. Johnny Two Bones’ walkabout was coming to an end. His cheeks and chest were smeared with red ochre, and he was singing an old song, a sort of singing map of the hills, and he was drawing patterns in the dust with his spear.

琼尼·双骨坐在沙漠中的红色盆地里。这是一处圣地，两块在梦境之年形成的祖先石从光阴之初就躺在这里。琼尼·双骨的旅程就要走到终点。他的面颊和胸口上涂着赭红色颜料，口中吟唱着古老歌谣，颂咏群山的疆界，同时还用长矛在土地上画着某种图案。

Adam was marching about excitedly, waving his hands in the air. “There’ll be no end to the fun we can have,” he said. “There’ll be exploring and everything. I ‘spect I can soon get the ole jungles to grow again.”

亚当兴奋地走来走去，双手在空中不停挥舞。“到时候咱们会有没完没了的乐子。”他说，“可以探险什么的。我估计我很快就能让古老的丛林重新长出来。”

“Oh. Indubitably, dear boy. Quite indubitably. In a manner of speaking. Now, to get back to my original question. Where am I?”

“哦。没错，亲爱的孩子。绝对没错。从某种角度来说。现在，回答我刚才的问题。我在哪儿？”

He had not eaten for two days; he had not slept. He was approaching a trance state, making him one with the Bush, putting him into communion with his ancestors.

他已经两天没吃东西，也没睡觉了。他逐渐接近入定状态，准备将自己融入树丛，同祖先进行交流。

Johnny scratched, thoughtfully. “I take it you’re one of me ancestors, then, mate?”

琼尼若有所思地挠挠头。“啊，伙计，我猜你是我的祖先之一？”

“Hello? Hello?” said Johnny Two Bones.

“你好？你好？”琼尼·双骨说。

He sat in the sand, and he waited, and he waited, but he didn’t reply.

他坐在沙漠中，等待着，等待着，但再也没有回音。

Nearly…

快了…

“Who said that?” said Johnny Two Bones.

“谁在说话？”琼尼·双骨问道。

“Only if you’re one of my ancestors,” continued Johnny Two Bones, “why are you talking like a poofter?”

“可如果你是我的祖先之一，”琼尼·双骨说，“怎么说起话来像个基佬？”

He was nearly there.

他就快到了。

“Excuse me, dear boy,” he said to himself, out loud, in precise, enunciated tones. “But have you any idea where I am?”

“抱歉，亲爱的孩子。”他对自己大声说道，吐字极为清晰准确，“但你知道我是在什么地方吗？”

“Ah. Australia,” said Johnny Two Bones” mouth, pronouncing the word as though it would have to be properly disinfected before he said it again. “Oh dear. Well, thank you anyway.”

“啊。澳大利亚。”琼尼·双骨的嘴说出这个词，感觉就好像再度开口前，应该先把它好好消消毒，“哦，好吧，总之多谢了。”

He blinked. Looked around wonderingly.

他眨眨眼，好奇地朝周围看了看。

His mouth opened. “I did.”

他张开嘴巴。“是我。”

Citron Deux-Chevaux was tonton macoute, a travelling houngan: [Magician, or priest. Voodoun is a very interesting religion for the whole family, even those members of it who are dead.] he had a satchel over his shoulder, containing magical plants, medicinal plants, bits of wild cat, black candles, a powder derived chiefly from the skin of a certain dried fish, a dead centipede, a half-bottle of Chivas Regal, ten Rothmans, and a copy of What’s On In Haiti.

雪铁龙·俩马力是海地民兵组织东东·马库迪的成员，也是一名游方的杭亘。（意思是法师或祭司。伏都教是个适合所有家庭成员的宗教，甚至包括已经已故的那些。）他肩上背着个小包，里面装有法术植物、药草、野猫的零碎、黑蜡烛、主要由某种干鱼皮制成的粉末、一条死蜈蚣、半瓶芝华士威士忌、十包乐福门香烟、一本《海地现况》。

Aziraphale had moved on.

亚茨拉菲尔已经上路了。

He hefted the knife, and, with an experienced slicing motion, cut the head from a black cockerel. Blood washed over his right hand.

他举起匕首，以驾轻就熟的切削动作，割下一只黑公鸡的脑袋。鲜血覆盖了他的右手。

“Where am I?” he said.

“我在哪儿？”他说。

“Is that my Gros Bon Ange?” he asked himself.

“是我的善良大天使吗？”他问自己。

“I think that’s a rather personal question,” he replied. “I mean, as these things go. But one tries as it were. One does one’s best.”

“我想这是个因人而异的问题。”他答道，“我是说，这些事向来如此。但我始终在努力。我总是尽力而为。”

“Loa ride me,” he intoned. “Gros Bon Ange come to me.”

“罗阿精灵上我身。”他吟咏着，“善良天使速速来。”

Citron found one of his hands reaching for the cockerel. “Rather unsanitary place to do your cooking, don’t you think? Out here in the jungle. Having a barbecue, are we? What kind of place is this?”

雪铁龙发现自己有只手正在摸索公鸡的尸体。“在这儿做饭可不太卫生啊，你不这么觉得吗？在这片丛林里。咱们是在举办烧烤野餐会，对吗？这是什么地方？”

“Damn! Nowhere near. Still, could be worse. Ah, I must be on my way. Be good.”

“该死！一点儿没近。不过话说回来，还可能更糟呢。啊，我必须上路了。再见。”

“Haitian,” he answered.

“海地。”他答道。

And Citron Deux-Chevaux was alone in his head.

雪铁龙·俩马力脑袋里只剩下他自己。

Jesus won’t cut you off before you’re through

耶稣不会在你接通前挂断，

The surf was loud on the beaches. The palms shook.

海浪拍岸的声音很响。棕榈树随风摇曳。

The lights went up. The Power Cable (Nebraska) Evangelical Choir launched into “Jesus is the Telephone Repairman on the Switchboard of My Life,” and almost drowned out the sound of the rising wind.

灯光亮起。电力电缆（内布拉斯加州）福音唱诗班开始演唱《耶稣是我生命中的接线总机电话修理员》，歌曲几乎盖过了越来越强的风声。

“Loas be buggered,” he muttered to himself He stared into nothing for a while, and then reached for the satchel and its bottle of Chivas Regal. There are at least two ways to turn someone into a zombie. He was going to take the easiest.

“罗阿真操蛋。”他凝视着眼前的空茫，然后拿过背包，翻出那瓶芝华士。至少有两种方法可以把一个人变成僵尸。他决定采用最容易的那种。

A storm was coming.

暴风雨即将来到。

Marvin O. Bagman adjusted his tie, checked his grin in the mirror, patted the bottom of his personal assistant (Miss Cindi Kellerhals, Penthouse Pet of the Month three years ago last July; but she had put that all behind her when she got Career), and he walked out onto the studio floor.

马文·O。博格曼正了正领带，对着镜子检查一下自己的笑容，又拍拍私人秘书的屁股（辛蒂·凯勒阿尔小姐三年前获得过《阁楼》杂志七月宠儿称号。但她步入职场后就把这些荒唐事都抛在脑后了），随即走上演播台。

With him you won’t never get a crossed line,

有他在你永远不会串线，

He’s the telephone repairman on the switchboard of my life

他是我生命中的接线总机电话修理员。

And when your bill comes it’ll all be properly itemized

收到账单时，条目列得清清楚楚，

Despite the fact that the lyrics didn’t rhyme, or, as a rule, make any sense, and that Marvin, who was not particularly musical, had stolen all the tunes from old country songs, Jesus Is My Buddy had sold over four million copies.

尽管这些歌词并不押韵，而且跟大多数歌曲一样毫无意义，另外马文其人也没有什么音乐天赋，旋律全都是剽窃过去的乡村民谣，但《耶稣是我哥们儿》还是卖出了四百多万张。

the choir sang. Marvin was fond of that song. He had written it himself. Other songs he had written included: “Happy Mister Jesus,” “Jesus, Can I Come and Stay at Your Place?” “That OI’ Fiery Cross,” “Jesus Is the Sticker on the Bumper of My Soul,” and “When I’m Swept Up by the Rapture Grab the Wheel of My Pick-Up.” They were available on Jesus Is My Buddy (LP, cassette, and CD), and were advertised every four minutes on Bagman’s evangelical network. [$12.95 per LP or cassette, $24.95 per CD, although you got a free copy of the LP with every $500 you donated to Marvin Bagman’s mission.]

唱诗班齐声高唱。马文很喜欢这首歌。这是他亲手写的。他还写过《快乐的耶稣先生》《耶稣，我能搬去和你住吗？》《古老的血十字架》《耶稣是我灵魂缓冲器上的保险杠》《当我至喜超升时，抓住了皮卡车的方向盘》。这些歌都收录在《耶稣是我哥们儿》中（唱片、磁带、CD均有销售），每隔四分钟就在博格曼的福音电视网上广告一次。（唱片或磁带售价12.95美元，CD售价24.95美元。但如果你向马文·O。博格曼传教团捐赠500美元，就可免费获得一张唱片。）

Marvin had started off as a country singer, singing old Conway Twitty and Johnny Cash songs.

起初马文只是个乡村歌手，专门演唱康威·特维蒂和约翰尼·卡什的老歌。

It was then that Marvin got religion. Not the quiet, personal kind, that involves doing good deeds and living a better life; not even the kind that involves putting on a suit and ringing people’s doorbells; but the kind that involves having your own TV network and getting people to send you money.

就在那时，马文开始信仰宗教。不是那种以行善积德、洁身自律为主的私密方式，也不是那种穿上西装挨家挨户去传教的方式，而是创建自己的电视网，让人们送钱给你的方式。

He had done regular live concerts from San Quentin jail until the civil rights people got him under the Cruel and Unusual Punishment clause.

他在圣昆廷监狱定期举办现场演唱会，直到人权部门的人以宪法第八修正案中“不得对他人施加不寻常的残酷惩罚”条款阻止了他。

He had found the perfect TV mix, on Marvin’s Hour of Power (“The show that put the FUN back into Fundamentalist!”). Four threeminute songs from the LP, twenty minutes of Hellfire, and five minutes of healing people. (The remaining twenty-three minutes were spent alternately cajoling, pleading, threatening, begging, and occasionally simply asking for money.) In the early days he had actually brought people into the studio to heal, but had found that too complicated, so these days he simply proclaimed visions vouchsafed to him of viewers all across America getting magically cured as they watched. This was much simpler — he no longer needed to hire actors, and there was no way anyone could check on his success rate. [It might have surprised Marvin to know there actually was a success rate. Some people would get better from anything.]

他已经在“马文的神力一小时”节目（让原教旨主义者重新找到乐趣！）中找到了完美的时间配比。从唱片里拿来的四首三分钟歌曲，二十分钟苦难宣讲，五分钟治愈病人。剩下的二十分钟用来哄骗、恳求、威胁、哀告，甚至偶尔直接要求人们寄钱。早年间他真会把病人带到演播室进行治愈，但很快发现这样太麻烦，如今他只是宣称通过幻象得知，全美各地的观众在收看节目时病症奇迹般的痊愈。这样简单多了，他再也不用雇请演员，也没人能验证他的治愈率。（有件事也许会令马文感到惊奇，他的节目确实有一定治愈率。有些人无论如何都会好转。）

The world is a lot more complicated than most people believe. Many people believed, for example, that Marvin was not a true Believer because he made so much money out of it. They were wrong. He believed with all his heart. He believed utterly, and spent a lot of the money that flooded in on what he really thought was the Lord’s work.

这个世界比大多数人想象中还要复杂。比方说，很多人认为马文不是个真正的信徒，因为他从中赚了很多钱。但他们错了。马文全心全意信仰上帝。他绝对虔诚，还将很多钱花在了凯勒阿尔小姐身上——马文打心眼儿里认为她是上帝的杰作。

The phone line to the saviour’s always free of interference

通向救世主的电话永不占线，

He’s in at any hour, day or night

他每时每刻守在那里，无论白天还是夜晚。

The first song concluded, and Marvin walked in front of the cameras and raised his arms modestly for silence. In the control booth, the engineer turned down the Applause track.

第一首歌结束后，马文走到摄像机前，谦逊地抬起双手示意大家安静。在控制室中，导播将控制掌声的音轨调了下去。

And when you call J-E-S-U-S you always call toll free

而且每次你打给耶稣，都不用付钱，

He’s the telephone repairman on the switchboard of my life.

他是我生命中的接线总机电话修理员。

He became more serious.

他板起面孔。

“Brothers and sisters, I’ve got a message for you all, an urgent message from our Lord, for you all, man and woman and little babes, friends, let me tell you about the Apocalypse. It’s all there in your bible, in the Revelation our Lord gave Saint John on Patmos, and in the Book of Daniel. The Lord always gives it to you straight, friends — your future. So what’s goin’ to happen?

“兄弟们，姐妹们，我给你们所有人带来了一个口信，来自我主上帝的紧急通知。我要告诉你们所有人，无论男女老少，朋友们，让我告诉你们那天启。它就在你们的《圣经》中，在我主上帝在帕特莫斯岛授予圣约翰的《启示录》中，也在《旧约：但以理书》中。上帝总是把它直接交给你们，我的朋友们。它指的是你们的未来。现今世界情况如何？

“Brothers and sisters, thank you, thank you, wasn’t that beautiful? And remember, you can hear that song and others just as edifyin’ on Jesus Is My Buddy, just phone 1-800-CASH and pledge your donation now.”

“兄弟们，姐妹们，谢谢，谢谢。真动听啊，不是吗？请记住，如果想听这首歌，以及《耶稣是我哥们儿》中其他颇具启示效果的歌曲，只需拨打1—800—CASH，捐出您的善款。”

“War. Plague. Famine. Death. Rivers urv blurd. Great earthquakes. Nukyeler missiles. Horrible times are cumin’, brothers and sisters. And there’s only one way to avoid ’em.

“战争、瘟疫、饥荒、死神。河流被污染。大地震。壳导弹。可怕的时代即将来到，兄弟们姐妹们，只有一个方法可以幸免。

“When the Rapture comes, brothers and sisters, all the True Believers will be swept up in the air — it don’t mind what you’re doin’, you could be in the bath, you could be at work, you could be drivin’ your car, or just sittin’ at home readin’ your Bible. Suddenly you’ll be up there in the air, in perfect and incorruptible bodies. And you’ll be up in the air, lookin’ down at the world as the years of destruction arrive. Only the faithful will be saved, only those of you who have been born again will avoid the pain and the death and the horror and the burnin’. Then will come the great war between Heaven and Hell, and Heaven will destroy the forces of Hell, and God shall wipe away the tears of the sufferin’, and there shall be no more death, or sorrow, or cryin’, or pain, and he shall rayon in glory for ever and ever –“

“当超升之喜到来时，兄弟们姐妹们，所有真正的信徒都会被卷上空中。不论你在做什么都一样，你可能正在洗澡，可能在工作，可能在开车，或是坐在家里读《圣经》。突然间，你就升上了天空，拥有完美而不朽的躯体。你会在空中，看着灾祸之年降临到这个世界。只有信仰能得拯救，只有你们这些重生之人，能够避免苦痛、死亡、恐惧和烧灼。接着天堂与地狱间的大战就会爆发，天堂将摧毁地狱的大军，上帝会抚去受苦者的泪水，世上再无死亡、哀伤、哭泣和苦痛。他将在荣光中永远统治下去…”

“What’s the Rapture? I hear you cry.

“什么是超升之喜？我听到了你们的呼声。

“Before the Destruction comes — before the four horsemen of the apocalypse ride out — before the nukerler missiles rain down on the unbelievers — there will come The Rapture.

“在大破坏到来之前，在天启四骑士到来之前，在如雨的壳武器落在没有信仰的人头上之前，会有超升之喜。

“Well, nice try,” he said, in a completely different voice, “only it won’t be like that at all. Not really.

“哦，猜得挺好。”他用一种完全不同的声音说道，“可惜完全不是这么回事。不全对。

He stopped, suddenly.

马文突然闭上了嘴。

“I mean, you’re right about the fire and war, all that. But that Rapture stuff well, if you could see them all in Heaven-serried ranks of them as far as the mind can follow and beyond, league after league of us, flaming swords, all that, well, what I’m trying to say is who has time to go round picking people out and popping them up in the air to sneer at the people dying of radiation sickness on the parched and burning earth below them? If that’s your idea of a morally acceptable time, I might add.

“我是说，烈火和战争这些东西，你说的都没错。但超升至喜这玩意儿，哦，如果你能看到他们聚集在天堂的样子就好了——他们密密麻麻的行列，远远超过人类头脑可以理解的范围。我们一队队的天使，拿着炎剑。就是这样，哦，我想说的是谁有空去挑选信徒，把他们弄上天，只为让他们耻笑那些留在焦灼燃烧的地球，患上辐射病的奄奄一息的人们？不知这场面是否符合你的道德准则。

“And as for that stuff about Heaven inevitably winning… Well, to be honest, if it were that cut and dried, there wouldn’t be a Celestial War in the first place, would there? It’s propaganda. Pure and simple. We’ve got no more than a fifty percent chance of coming out on top. You might just as well send money to a Satanist hotline to cover your bets, although to be frank when the fire falls and the seas of blood rise you lot are all going to be civilian casualties either way. Between our war and your war, they’re going to kill everyone and let God sort it out — right?

“至于天堂必定获胜的部分…哦，说实话，如果真是已成定局的话，那一开始就不会有什么天国之战了，不是吗？这只是宣传。彻头彻尾的宣传。我们胜利的机会不超过百分之五十。你们可以给撒旦信徒热线捐点钱，好提高赢面。不过说实话，等火球降下，血海升起，你们早晚都得变成平民伤亡数据里的一部分。我们的战争再加上你们的战争，会害死所有人，然后让上帝收拾残局，不是吗？

All we need is, Radio Gaga, sang Freddie Mercury.

“我们只需要，伽伽电台。”弗雷迪·墨丘利唱道。

“Anyway, sorry to stand here wittering, I’ve just a quick questionwhere am I?”

“哦，真抱歉，瞧我站在这儿唠唠叨叨的。我有个小问题，这是什么地方？”

He wanted Bach, but he would settle for The Travelling Wilburys.

他想听巴赫，但“旅行中的维尔伯瑞斯”乐队也凑合。

He swung around the Marble Arch Roundabout the wrong way, doing ninety. Lightning made the London skies flicker like a malfunctioning fluorescent tube.

他以一百四十公里的时速逆行绕过大理石环道。闪电让伦敦的天空像有毛病的荧光灯一样不停闪烁。

He reached into the glove compartment for his spare pair of sunglasses, and found only cassettes. Irritably he grabbed one at random and pushed it into the slot.

他把手伸进杂物柜，寻找备用的太阳镜，但只找到了一堆磁带。他不耐烦地随便抓起一盒，塞进车载录音机。

All I need is out, thought Crowley.

我只需要出去，克鲁利心想。

There was a pause. Marvin tried to open his mouth, but nothing happened. Whatever was in his head looked around. He looked at the studio crew, those who weren’t phoning the police, or sobbing in corners. He looked at the gray-faced cameramen.

他的话语突然中断。马文试图张嘴说话，但却办不到。他脑袋里的东西开始四下张望。他看到演播室员工，或者说除了正给警察打电话，或是缩在角落里抽泣的人以外的员工。他看到了脸色灰白的摄像师。

Marvin O. Bagman was gradually going purple.

马文·O。博格曼的脸色终于变成了紫色。

“Gosh,” he said, “am I on television?”

“老天。”他说，“我还在直播？”

“It’s the devil! Lord protect me! The devil is speakin’ through me!” he erupted, and interrupted himself, “Oh no, quite the opposite in fact. I’m an angel. Ah. This has to be America, doesn’t it? So sorry, can’t stay…”

“这是魔鬼！上帝庇佑！魔鬼正通过我发言！”他的喊叫突然被自己打断了，“哦，不，其实正相反。我是个天使。啊，这儿肯定是美国，对吧？抱歉，不能久留了…”

Crowley was doing a hundred and twenty miles an hour down Oxford Street.

克鲁利以两百公里的时速，沿牛津街行驶。

Then he read it one more time, with a slow sinking feeling at the base of his stomach.

然后他读了第三遍，心中有种缓缓下沉的感觉。

The Bentley headed out of London while Crowley sat back in the driver’s seat and thumbed through the singed copy of The Nice and Accurate Prophecies of Agnes Nutter.

宾利车驶出伦敦，克鲁利往椅背上一靠，开始翻阅烧焦了边的《艾格尼丝·风子的精良准确预言书》。

The cassette finished, activating the car radio.

磁带播放完毕，自动激活了车上的收音机。

A livid sky on London, Crowley thought, And I knew the end was near. Who had written that? Chesterton, wasn’t it? The only poet in the twentieth century to even come close to the Truth.

伦敦天色若铅，克鲁利心想，我知道末日不远。这是谁写的？切斯特顿，对吗？二十世纪以来，唯一接近真相的诗人。

Near the end of the book he found a folded sheet of paper covered in Aziraphale’s neat copperplate handwriting. He unfolded it (while the Bentley’s gearstick shifted itself down to third and the car accelerated around a fruit lorry, which had unexpectedly backed out of aside street), and then he read it again.

在这本书快结束的地方，他找到一张叠起来的纸条，上面是亚茨拉菲尔工整清晰的字体。他把纸条打开，又读了一遍。与此同时宾利车自动换到三挡，加速避开一辆突然从路边倒出来的水果大卡车。

Anyway, there wasn’t really anywhere else to go.

反正他现在也没别的地方好去。

“… Gardeners’ Question Time coming to you from Tadfield Gardening Club. We were last here in 1953, a very nice summer, and as the team will remember it’s a rich Oxfordshire loam in the East of the parish, rising to chalk in the West; the kind of place of say, don’t matter what you plant here, it’ll come up beautiful Isn’t that right, Fred?”

“…塔德菲尔德园艺俱乐部为您带来园艺匠问答时间。我们上次到这里还是1953年，那真是个美妙的夏天，小组成员们也许还记得郊区以东是牛津郡肥沃的有机土，在西方则逐渐变为白垩地。这正是人们常说的那种地方，无论种什么东西，都会茁壮成长。是这样吗，弗雷德？”

The car changed direction suddenly. It was now heading for the village of Tadfield, in Oxfordshire. He could be there in an hour if he hurried.

车子突然转向，朝牛津郡塔德菲尔德镇驶去。如果抓紧时间，他可以用一个小时赶到那里。

“Right — First question for the team, and this comes from Mr. R. P. Tyler, chairman of the local Residents Association, I do believe.”

“好的。向小组提出的第一个问题，来自R.P。泰勒先生。据说是当地居民委员会主席。”

“Ahem. That’s right. Well, I’m a keen rose grower, but my prizewinning Molly McGuire lost a couple of blossoms yesterday in a rain of what were apparently fish. What does the team recommend for this other than place netting over the garden? I mean, I’ve written to the council…”

“啊咳。是的。哦，我热衷于种植玫瑰，但在昨天那场落鱼的暴雨中，我那株获过奖的莫莉·麦圭尔掉了几朵花。请问园艺小组，除了在花园上架设网子以外，还有什么其他建议？我是说，我已经给村镇委员会写过信…”

“Yep,” said Professor Fred Windbright, Royal Botanical Gardens, “Couldn’t of put it better meself.”

“没错。”皇家植物园的弗雷德·温德布赖特教授说，“换作是我，也没法表述得更好了。”

“Mr. Tyler, let me ask you a question — were these fresh fish, or preserved?”

“泰勒先生，让我先提个问题。是鲜鱼，还是腌鱼？”

“Well, you’ve got no problems, my friend. I hear you’ve also been having rains of blood in these parts — and I wish we had these up in the Dales, where my garden is. Save me a fortune in fertilizers. Now, what you do is, you dig them in to your…” CROWLEY?

“好的，那就没问题了，我的朋友。我听说你们那里最近还下过血雨，真希望北部谷地也有类似的天气，我的花园在那里，能帮我省下不少肥料开支。那么你现在要做的就是把它们掺进土…”克鲁利？

“Fresh, I believe.”

“我想是鲜鱼。”

“Not a common problem, I’d say. Harry?”

“我必须承认，这不是个常见的问题。对吧，哈里？”

Crowley said nothing.

克鲁利一句话也没说。

CROWLEY THE WAR HAS BEGUN, CROWLEY WE NOTE WITH INTEREST THAT YOU AVOIDED THE FORCES WE EMPOWERED TO COLLECT YOU.

克鲁利。大战已然爆发，克鲁利，我们兴致盎然地注意到，你避开了我们派去接收你的部队。

JUST OUR LITTLE JOKE.

只是我们的小玩笑。

MORTALS CAN HOPE FOR DEATH, OR FOR REDEMPTION. YOU CAN HOPE FOR NOTHING. ALL YOU CAN HOPE FOR IS THE MERCY OF HELL.

凡人可以指望死亡，或是救赎。你什么希望都没有。你所能希望的，只有地狱的慈悲。

Crowley was silent.

克鲁利没说话。

Crowley turned off the radio and bit his lower lip. Beneath the ash and soot that flaked his face, he looked very tired, and very pale, and very scared.

克鲁利关上收音机，咬着下唇。他脸上沾满尘灰和泥土，看上去非常疲惫、非常苍白、非常恐惧。

“Yeah?”

“哦？”

“… now as keen gardeners know, it goes without sayin’ that he’s a cunnin’ little devil, your Tibetan. Tunnelin’ straight through your begonias like it was nobody’s business. A cup of tea’ll shift him, with rancid yak butter for preference you should be able to get some at any good Bard…”

“…如今热心的园艺匠们都知道，不用说你的西藏人是个狡猾的小恶魔。直接在你的秋海棠园里挖地道，完全不当回事。一杯茶可以改变他的态度，加发臭的牦牛黄油效果更好，你可以在任何专门店里得到这东西…”

“Ngk,” said Crowley.

“靠。”克鲁利说。

Wheee. Whizz. Pop. Static drowned out the rest of the program.

嗡。嗖。嘭。噪音淹没了剩下的节目。

And, suddenly, very angry. It was the way they talked to you. As if you were a houseplant who had started shedding leaves on the carpet.

突然间，又多了非常愤怒。这是因为他们跟你讲话的方式。就好像你是个开始往地毯上掉叶子的盆栽。

“Mm,” Crowley agreed.

“嗯。”克鲁利没有反驳。

CROWLEY… WE WILL WIN THIS WAR. BUT EVEN IF WE LOSE, AT LEAST AS FAR AS YOU ARE CONCERNED, IT WILL MAKE NO DIFFERENCE AT ALL. FOR AS LONG AS THERE IS ONE DEMON LEFT IN HELL, CROWLEY, YOU WILL WISH YOU HAD BEEN CREATED MORTAL.

克鲁利…我们会赢得这场大战。但就算我们失败了，至少对你来说，也没有任何差别。只要地狱还剩下一个魔鬼，克鲁利，你最好希望自己是个凡人。

But something had happened to the M25. Something that hurt your eyes, if you looked directly at it.

但M25公路上出了点问题。那上面有些东西，如果你直视过去，就会觉得眼睛疼。

And then he turned a corner, which was meant to take him onto the slip road to the M25, from which he’d swing off onto the M40 up to Oxfordshire.

他拐过一个弯，也就是说开向M25公路交会点，他将从那里转到M40公路，朝牛津郡驶去。

The dreaded sigil Odegra, thought Crowley, as he swung the car around, heading for the North Circular. I did that — that’s my fault. It could have been just another motorway. A good job, I’ll grant you, but was it really worthwhile? It’s all out of control. Heaven and Hell aren’t running things any more, it’s like the whole planet is a Third World country that’s finally got the Bomb…

可怕的魔符印记Odegra，克鲁利心想。他一打方向盘，朝北环道驶去。是我干的，是我的错。本来它不过是一条普通公路。干得真漂亮，我可以保证，但这真的值得吗？已经全都失去控制了。天堂和地狱再也无法让世界运转，整个世界就好像最终得到核武器的邪恶轴心国…

From what had been the M25 London Orbital Motorway came a low chanting, a noise formed of many strands: car horns, and engines, and sirens, and the bleep of cellular telephones, and the screaming of small children trapped by back-seat seat-belts for ever. “Hail the Great Beast, Devourer of Worlds,” came the chanting, over and over again, in the secret tongue of the Black priesthood of ancient Mu.

曾经是伦敦M25环形高速路的地方传来一阵低沉的吟唱，这是由各种声响汇成的噪音：汽车喇叭声、发动机声、警笛、手机铃声，还有永远被后座安全带困住的小孩子的吵闹声。它们用古代姆大陆黑暗祭祀密语一遍遍地吟唱道：“万岁，地狱巨兽，世界吞噬者。”

What the hell. If you had to go, why not go with style?

见鬼去吧。如果非走不可，为何不漂漂亮亮地走？

Then he began to smile. He snapped his fingers. A pair of dark glasses materialized out of his eyes. The ash vanished from his suit and his skin.

他忽然露出微笑，随即打了个响指。一双墨镜在眼前具形。衣服和皮肤上的尘灰也消失了。

Whistling softly, he drove.

他开着车，轻声吹起口哨。

They weren’t going that fast, all things considered. The four of them were holding a steady 105 mph, as if they were confident that the show could not start before they got there. It couldn’t. They had all the time in the world, such as it was.

总的来说，他们开得并不快。四个人把时速稳定保持在一百七十公里，似乎坚信在他们到达之前，大戏不会开演。确实不会。他们有的是时间，就和以往一样。

Just behind them came four other riders: Big Ted, Greaser, Pigbog, and Skuzz.

有四个人跟在他们身后：大特德、暴走族、猪粪和油泥。

They came down the outside lane of the motorway like destroying angels, which was fair enough.

他们走上屋外的摩托车道，仿佛是四个毁灭天使，这种说法其实相当准确。

Around them, they knew, was the roar of the thunderstorm, the thunder of traffic, the whipping of the wind and the rain. But in the wake of the Horsemen there was silence, pure and dead. Almost pure, anyway. Certainly dead.

他们知道，雷暴在四周怒吼，风雨大作，车流轰鸣。但在骑士们身后只有寂静。纯粹的死寂。差不多算纯粹吧。至少是死透了的。

They were elated. They were real Hell’s Angels now, and they rode the silence.

他们很兴奋。他们现在是真正的地狱天使了，正在寂静中骑行。

It was broken by Pigbog, shouting to Big Ted.

猪粪最先打破这个局面，他对大特德喊了句话。

“What you going to be, then?” he asked, hoarsely.

“那么你要当谁？”他干巴巴地问道。

“Yeah? So?”

“嗯？怎么了？”

“I heard what you said. It’s not what you said. Everyone heard what you said. What did you mean, tha’s what I wanter know?”

“我听见你说什么了。我没问你说什么。所有人都听见你说什么了。你这话什么意思？我想知道的是这个。”

“Course you can’t be War. How can you be War? She’s War. You’ve got to be something else.”

“你当然不能当战争。你怎么能是战争？她是战争。你得选个别的。”

If he’d known he was going to be in it, he’d have read it more carefully. “What I mean is, they’re the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, right?”

如果他知道事情会发展到这一步，肯定会读得更加仔细。“我的意思是说，他们是天启四骑士，对吧？”

“So?”

“所以？”

“Right. Four Bikers of the Apocalypse. War, Famine, Death, and, and the other one. P’lution.”

“对。天启四车手。战争、饥荒、死神和、和另外那个。污染。”

Big Ted screwed up his face with the effort of thought. “G. B. H.,” he said, eventually. “I’m Grievous Bodily Harm. That’s me. There. Wott’re you going to be?”

大特德使劲思考，脸都皱成了一团。“重度伤害。”他最终说道，“我是重度伤害。这就是我。没错。你们要当谁？”

“Bikers,” said Greaser.

“车手。”油泥说。

“I said, what you –“

“我说，你要…”

“So they said it was all right if we came with them, right?”

“他们说咱们跟去也没问题，对吧？”

“So we’re the other Four Horse –, um, Bikers of the Apocalypse. So which ones are we?”

“所以咱们是下一波天启四骑…呃，四车手。那咱们都是谁？”

“Can I be War as well?” asked Big Ted.

“我能当战争吗？”大特德问道。

There was a pause. The lights of passing cars shot past them in the opposite lane, lightning after-imaged the clouds, and the silence was close to absolute.

所有人都没说话。迎面而来的车灯在他们身边一闪而过，闪电留下云朵的残像，寂静几乎牢不可破。

“What?”

“什么？”

Pigbog wished he’d paid more attention to the Book of Revelation.

猪粪真希望自己在《启示录》那章多花点时间。

“S’not!” said Pigbog, nettled. “It’s like War, and Famine, and that. It’s a problem of life, isn’t it? Answer phones. I hate bloody answer phones.”

“一点儿也不！”猪粪怒气冲冲地说，“它跟战争、饥荒什么的都一样。它是生命中的麻烦，不对吗？电话答录机。我恨该死的电话答录机。”

Grievous Bodily Harm, Embarrassing Personal Problems, Pigbog and Greaser.

重度伤害、难言之隐、猪粪和油泥。

“I, uh… I think I’ll be them answer phones. They’re pretty bad,” he said.

“我，嗯…我想我应该是电话答录机。这东西很讨厌。”他说。

“I hate ansaphones, too,” said Cruelty to Animals.

“我也恨这玩意儿。”虐待动物说。

“Can I be Rubbish?” asked Skuzz. “Or Embarrassing Personal Problems?”

“我能当垃圾吗？”暴走族说，“或者难言之隐？”

“Can’t be Rubbish,” said Grievous Bodily Harm. “He’s got that one sewn up, Pollution. You can be the other, though.”

“不能当垃圾。”重度伤害说，“他把这些都包圆了，污染。但你可以当另外那个。”

“You can’t be ansaphones. What kind of a Biker of the Repocalypse is ansaphones? That’s stupid, that is.”

“你不能当电话答录机。哪有天启四车手是电话答录机的？简直太蠢了。”

And then it was Pigbog’s turn.

轮到猪粪了。

“I wonter be Cruelty to Animals,” said Greaser. Pigbog wondered if he was for or against it. Not that it really mattered.

“我想当虐待动物。”油泥说。猪粪琢磨着他对这件事到底是什么态度，支持还是反对？不过怎么都无所谓。

They rode on in the silence and the dark, the rear red lights of the Four a few hundred yards in front of them.

他们在寂静黑暗中骑行，四骑士红色的尾灯就在前方一百多码。

“You can shut up,” said G. B. H.

“你给我闭嘴。”重度伤害说。

“Can I change mine?” asked Embarrassing Personal Problems, who had been thinking intently since he last spoke. “I want to be Things Not Working Properly Even After You’ve Thumped Them.”

“我能换一个吗？”这会儿工夫，难言之隐一直在认真思考，“我想当你使劲拍一下都不能正常工作的东西。”

“All right, you can change. But you can’t be ansaphones, Pigbog. Pick something else.”

“好吧，你可以换。但你不能当电话答录机，猪粪。选个别的。”

“Really cool people?” said Things Not Working Properly Even After You’ve Given Them A Good Thumping.

“特别酷的人？”你使劲拍一下都不能正常工作的东西问。

“Yeah,” said Cruelty to Animals. “An’ they all wear sunglasses even when they dunt need ’em.”

“对。”虐待动物说，“而且他们没事还老戴个太阳镜。”

Pigbog pondered. He wished he’d never broached the subject. It was like the careers interviews he had had as a schoolboy. He deliberated.

猪粪斟酌一番。他有点后悔自己提起这件事。这就像他还在上学时经历过的工作面试。他慎重考虑着。

“Yeah. You know. The kind you see on telly, with stupid haircuts, only on them it dun’t look stupid ‘cos it’s them. They wear baggy suits, an’ you’re not allowed to say they’re a bunch of wankers. I mean, speaking for me, what I always want to do when I see one of them is push their faces very slowly through a barbed-wire fence. An’ what I think is this.” He took a deep breath. He was sure this was the longest speech he had ever made in his life. [Except for one about ten years earlier, throwing himself on the mercy of the court.] “What I think is this. If they get up my nose like that, they pro’lly get up everyone else’s.”

“对。你知道的。就是你在电视上看见的那种人。发型特傻，只是在他们头上就不显得傻了。他们穿着松松垮垮的西服，你还不能说他们是一帮淫棍。要我说，一看见这种人，我就想把他们的脸按在带刺的铁丝网上，一点点推过去。我是这么想的。”猪粪深吸口气。他可以确定这是有生以来讲得最多的一次。（除了大概十年前，他请求法庭发发慈悲的那次。）“我是这么想的。如果他们这么让我不待见，估计也会让所有人不待见。”

“Really cool people,” he said at last. “I hate them.”

“特别酷的人。”他最终说，“我恨他们。”

“Anyway,” said Pigbog. “That’s why I wonter be Really Cool People.”

“总之。”猪粪说，“我要当特别酷的人。”

“No you bloody can’t,” said Grievous Bodily Harm. “You’ve changed once already.”

“不，你他妈不能换。”重度伤害说，“你已经换过一次了。”

“Eatin’ runny cheese, and that stupid bloody No Alcohol Lager,” said Things Not Working Properly Even After You’ve Given Them A Good Thumping. “I hate that stuff. What’s the point of drinking the stuff if it dun’t leave you puking? Here, I just thought. Can I change again, so I’m No Alcohol Lager?”

“还吃软干酪。还有那愚蠢的无酒精啤酒。”你使劲拍一下都不能正常工作的东西说，“我恨这玩意儿。如果你喝不吐，那还喝个什么劲？对了，我刚想起来。我能再换一次吗？我想当无酒精啤酒。”

“Don’t see why I can’t be No bloody Alcohol Lager if I want.”

“我不明白我想当无酒精啤酒，为什么不能当？”

“Shut your face.”

“一边待着去。”

She had her flowing dress on, and a saucepan full of sprouts on the stove. The room was lit by candlelight, each candle carefully placed in a wax-encrusted wine bottle at the four corners of her sitting room.

她穿上了飘逸长裙，一锅炖甘蓝就坐在火上。房间由烛光照明，每根蜡烛都仔细放入一个布满烛油的红酒瓶里，码放在客厅四角。

“All right,” said his leader.

“好吧。”他们的头儿说。

And Grievous Bodily Harm, Cruelty to Animals, Things Not Working Properly Even After You’ve Given Them A Good Thumping But Secretly No Alcohol Lager, and Really Cool People traveled with them.

重度伤害、虐待动物，表面是你使劲拍一下都不能正常工作的东西其实是无酒精啤酒，还有特别酷的人与他们同行。

It was a wet and blustery Saturday afternoon, and Madame Tracy was feeling very occult.

这是个潮湿嘈杂的周六下午，特蕾西夫人自我感觉特别诡秘。

Death and Famine and War and Pollution continued biking toward Tadfield.

死神、饥荒、战争和污染继续朝塔德菲尔德驶去。

“Can you link hands?” asked Madame Tracy. “And we must have complete silence. The spirit world is very sensitive to vibration.”

“你们能把手拉起来吗？”特蕾西夫人说，“咱们必须保持安静。灵魂世界对扰动特别敏感。”

There were three other people at her sitting. Mrs. Ormerod from Belsize Park, in a dark green hat that might have been a flowerpot in a previous life; Mr. Scroggie, thin and pallid, with bulging colorless eyes; and Julia Petley from Hair Today, [Formerly A Cut Above the Rest, formerly Mane Attraction, formerly Cur! Up And Dye, formerly A Snip At the Price, formerly Mister Brian’s Art-de-Coiffeur, formerly Robinson the Barber’s, formerly Fone-a-Car Taxis.] the hairdressers’ on the High Street, fresh out of school and convinced that she herself had unplumbed occult depths. In order to enhance the occult aspects of herself, Julia had begun to wear far too much handbeaten silver jewelry and green eyeshadow. She felt she looked haunted and gaunt and romantic, and she would have, if she had lost another thirty pounds. She was convinced that she was anorexic, because every time she looked in the mirror she did indeed see a fat person.

她身旁坐着三个人。家住贝尔塞兹公园的奥默罗德夫人，戴着一顶上辈子八成是花盆的深绿色帽子。史考基先生小手苍白，一双无色的眼睛往外突着。还有大街上“今日发型”的美发师朱莉娅·佩德利。（这家店铺之前是“高人一剪”，再之前是“长发诱惑”，再之前是“卷发染发”，再之前是“平价剪发”，再之前是“布赖恩先生的理发艺术”，再之前是“理发师罗宾森”，再之前是“叫一辆车出租公司”。）她刚步出校园，深信自己的诡秘程度深不可测。为了提高诡秘造诣，朱莉娅开始佩戴海量的手制银饰，涂绿眼影。她认为自己看起来鬼气森森、面容憔悴又浪漫。如果她再减个三十磅，就能达到这一效果。朱莉娅确信自己患上了厌食症，因为每次照镜子时，她的确会看到个胖子。

She did her shopping list in her head.

她在脑袋里开列着购物清单。

Madame Tracy threw back her head, let it loll on one shoulder, then slowly lifted it again. Her eyes were almost shut.

特蕾西夫人把头往后一仰，无力地垂在肩膀上，然后再慢慢抬起。她几乎完全闭上了眼睛。

“I will, love, but you’ve got to be quiet while I make contact.”

“我会的，亲爱的，但我进行联络时，你必须保持安静。”

Madame Tracy had found, through years of Drawing Aside the Veil and Exploring the Mysteries, that two minutes was the right length of time to sit in silence, waiting for the Spirit World to make contact. More than that and they got restive, less than that and they felt they weren’t getting their money’s worth.

经营“揭开帷幕探索神秘世界”这么多年，特蕾西夫人早就发现，安静坐好，等待灵魂世界进行联络的最佳时长是两分钟。超过这个时间，人们会感到烦躁；少于这个时间他们会觉得钱花得不值。

There was silence, broken only by Mr. Scroggie’s stomach rumbling. “Pardon, ladies,” he mumbled.

房间中鸦雀无声，只有史考基先生的肚子发出阵阵咕噜声。“抱歉，女士们。”他喃喃说道。

“Ask if my Ron is there,” said Mrs. Ormerod. She had a jaw like a brick.

“问问我的罗恩在不在。”奥默罗德夫人问道。她有个砖头似的下巴。

“She’s going under now, dear,” she heard Mrs. Ormerod whisper to Julia Petley. “Nothing to be alarmed about. She’s just making herself a Bridge to the Other Side. Her spirit guide will be along soon.”

“她正在进入状态。”奥默罗德夫人轻声对朱莉娅·佩德利说，“不用紧张。她只是在同彼方架起一道桥梁。她的灵魂向导很快就要来了。”

Eggs. Lettuce. Ounce of cooking cheese. Four tomatoes. Butter. Roll of toilet paper. Mustn’t forget that, we’re nearly out. And a really nice piece of liver for Mr. Shadwell, poor old soul, it’s a shame…

鸡蛋。莴苣。一点烹调干酪。四个土豆。黄油。几卷手纸。这个千万不能忘，已经快用光了。再给沙德维尔先生来一份上好的猪肝，可怜的老家伙，绝不能…

Time.

到时间了。

“Is my Ron there, Geronimo?” asked Mrs. Ormerod.

“我的罗恩在吗，格罗尼默？”奥默罗德夫人问。

Then, in a high-pitched, quavery voice, “Are you there, my Spirit Guide?”

接着用尖锐的颤声说：“你在吗，我的灵魂向导？”

“Is um me, how,” she replied.

“是嗯我，哦。”她答道。

Madame Tracy found herself rather irritated at being upstaged, and she let out a low moan. “Oooooooooh.”

被人抢戏令特蕾西夫人相当恼火，她发出一阵低吟。“哦——嗯——”

“How, Miss Petley?” she said, as Geronimo. She had always understood that Red Indian spirit guides were an essential prop, and she rather liked the name. She had explained this to Newt. She didn’t know anything about Geronimo, he realized, and he didn’t have the heart to tell her.

“哦，佩德利小姐？”她以格罗尼默的口吻说。特蕾西夫人早就知道印第安灵魂向导是必不可少的道具，而且很喜欢这个名字。她曾跟牛顿解释过这些问题。年轻人意识到特蕾西夫人对格罗尼默[6]一无所知，他也懒得详加解释。【注：[6]格罗尼默1829年出生于新墨西哥州，作为一支阿帕西印第安人的领袖，对美国政府进行了长期抵抗，战功卓著。】

“Oh,” squeaked Julia. “Charmed to make your acquaintance.”

“啊。”朱莉娅尖声说道，“很高兴认识您。”

She waited a little, to build up the suspense. Washing-up liquid. Two cans of baked beans. Oh, and potatoes.

她稍等片刻，留下少许悬念。洗涤液。两罐烘豆。哦，还有土豆。

“Is that you, Geronimo?” she asked herself.

“是你吗，格罗尼默？”她问自己。

“How?” she said, in a dark brown voice.

“哦？”她用低沉喑哑的声音说。

“We have a new member of the circle with us this afternoon,” she said.

“今天下午有位新成员加入。”她说。

“How, squaw Beryl,” said Madame Tracy. “Oh there are so many um of the poor lost souls um lined up against um door to my teepee. Perhaps your Ron is amongst them. How.”

“哦，贝里尔太太。”特蕾西夫人说，“这里有那么多嗯失落的可怜灵魂嗯在我的圆帐篷门口嗯排成了行。也许你的罗恩在他们之中。哦。”

Madame Tracy had learned her lesson years earlier, and now never brought Ron through until near the end. If she didn’t, Beryl Ormerod would occupy the rest of the seance telling the late Ron Ormerod everything that had happened to her since their last little chat. (“… now Ron, you remember, our Eric’s littlest, Sybilla, well you wouldn’t recognize her now, she’s taken up macrame, and our Letitia, you know, our Karen’s oldest, she’s become a lesbian but that’s all right these days and is doing a dissertation on the films of Sergio Leone as seen from a feminist perspective, and our Stan, you know, our Sandra’s twin, I told you about him last time, well, he won the darts tournament, which is nice because we all thought he was a bit of a mother’s boy, while the guttering over the shed’s come loose, but I spoke to our Cindi’s latest, who’s a jobbing builder, and he’ll be over to see to it on Sunday, and ohh, that reminds me…”)

特蕾西夫人几年前接受了教训，如今不到快散场时，她是不会让罗恩出场的。如果不这么做，贝里尔·奥默罗德就会占用剩下的时间，把上次降神会后发生的所有事跟已故的罗恩·奥默罗德说一遍。（“…罗恩，你还记得吗，咱们爱里克最小的孩子，茜比拉，哦，你现在肯定认不出她了，她开始编制工艺品了。咱们的莉迪希娅，你知道，是咱们克伦最大的孩子，她成了同性恋，但如今这很正常；她从女性主义角度出发，写了一篇关于意大利西部片大导演瑟吉欧·莱昂内的论文。还有斯坦，你知道，咱们桑德拉的双胞胎，我上次跟你说过他的事。哦，他赢得了飞镖锦标赛的冠军，真是棒极了，咱们过去一直觉得他太过柔弱了。另外小屋的排水系统又坏了，但我跟咱们辛蒂现在的丈夫说过了。他是个打零工的建筑工人。他周日会来看一眼，还有，哦哦，这倒让我想起来…”）

No, Beryl Ormerod could wait. There was a flash of lightning, followed almost immediately by a rumble of distant thunder. Madame Tracy felt rather proud, as if she had done it herself. It was even better than the candles at creating ambulance. Ambulance was what mediuming was all about.

不，贝里尔·奥默罗德可以再等等。窗外电光一闪，紧接着传来一阵远雷声。特蕾西夫人相当自豪，就好像那是自己的手笔。它创造出的灵异气氛比蜡烛更好。通灵时需要的就是这种气氛。

“Right, well there’s somebody here for you.” Mr. Scroggie had been coming for a month now, and she hadn’t been able to think of a message for him. His time had come. “Do you know anyone named, um, John?”

“好的，这里有人想跟你说话。”史考基先生参加降神会已经一个月了，她还没能想出个合适口信。这次该轮到他了。“你认不认识叫，嗯，约翰的人？”

“Now,” said Madame Tracy in her own voice. “Mr. Geronimo would like to know, is there anyone named Mr. Scroggie here?”

“那么，”特蕾西夫人用自己的声音说，“格罗尼默先生想知道，这里有叫史考基的先生吗？”

Scroggie’s watery eyes gleamed. “Erm, actually that’s my name,” he said, hopefully.

史考基雾蒙蒙的眼神突然一亮。“哦哦，我就叫这名字。”他满怀希望地说。

“No,” said Mr. Scroggie.

“不。”史考基先生说。

“I knew a Dave when I was in Hemel Hempstead,” said Mr. Scroggie, a trifle doubtfully.

“我住在赫默尔·亨普斯特德镇的时候，认识个叫戴夫的。”史考基先生略显疑惑地说。

“Yes, he’s saying, Hemel Hempstead, that’s what he’s saying,” said Madame Tracy.

“对，他说了，赫默尔·亨普斯特德镇。他就是这么说的。”特蕾西夫人说。

“Well, there’s some celestial interference here. The name could be Tom. Or Jim. Or, um, Dave.”

“好的，天国线路也会有些干扰。他的名字应该是汤姆，或吉姆。或者，哦，戴夫。”

“But I ran into him last week, walking his dog, and he looked perfectly healthy,” said Mr. Scroggie, slightly puzzled.

“但我上周还碰见他在外面遛狗，看起来挺健康的。”史考基先生有点摸不着头脑。

“Tell my Ron I’ve got to tell him about our Krystal’s wedding,” said Mrs. Ormerod.

“跟我的罗恩说一声，我要跟他讲我们克莉丝托的婚礼。”奥默罗德夫人说。

“He says not to worry, and he’s happier beyond the veil,” soldiered on Madame Tracy, who felt it was always better to give her clients good news.

“他说不用担心，他在帷幕另一侧过得更开心。”特蕾西夫人硬着头皮说了下去，她总希望给自己的客户带来好消息。

“I will, love. Now, hold on a mo’, there’s something coming through…”

“我会的，亲爱的。现在，稍等一下，有什么东西过来了…”

“Is that you, Ron?” asked Mrs. Ormerod. The reply, when it came, was rather testy.

“是你吗，罗恩？”奥默罗德夫人问道。特蕾西夫人的回答，口气相当急躁。

“Sprechen sie Deutsch?” it said, using Madame Tracy’s mouth. “Parlez-vous Franrais? Wo bu hui jiang zhongwen?”

“Sprechen sie Deutsch？”它通过特蕾西夫人的嘴说，“Parlezvous Franrais？Ni hui jiang zhong wen ma？[7]”【注：[7]你会讲德文吗？你会讲法文吗？你会讲中文吗？】

And then something came through. It sat in Madame Tracy’s head and peered out.

有什么东西过来了。它坐在特蕾西夫人脑袋里，向外看了看。

“No. Definitely not. However, a question so manifestly dim can only have been put in one country on this benighted planet — most of which, incidentally, I have seen during the last few hours. Dear lady, this is not Ron.”

“不。绝对不是。但是在这个愚昧的星球上——我刚巧在过去几小时中游历了大部分地区，如此隐晦的问题只可能来自一个国家。亲爱的女士，我不是罗恩。”

Mrs. Ormerod and Mr. Scroggie gave each other looks. Nothing like this had happened at Madame Tracy’s previous sittings. Julia Petley was rapt. This was more like it. She hoped Madame Tracy was going to start manifesting ectoplasm next.

奥默罗德夫人和史考基先生对视一眼。在此前的降神会上，从没出过这种事。朱莉娅·佩德利全神贯注地看着特蕾西夫人。越来越像那么回事了。她希望接下来特蕾西夫人的身体会变得空灵透明。

“Well, I want to speak to Ron Ormerod,” said Mrs. Ormerod, a little testily. “He’s rather short, balding on top. Can you put him on, please?”

“好吧，我要跟罗恩·奥默罗德讲话。”奥默罗德略显烦躁地说，“他个子不高，秃顶。你能让他过来吗？谢谢。”

There was a pause. “Actually there does appear to be a spirit of that description hovering over here. Very well. I’ll hand you over, but you must make it quick. I am attempting to avert the apocalypse.”

对面静了片刻。“确实有个符合这种描述的灵魂正在这儿飘。好吧。我会让你们说两句，但你必须赶快。我正试图改变天启。”

“Yes, Buh-Beryl.”

“是的，贝、贝里尔。”

“Shut up,” and the spirit was gone. “Wasn’t that touching? Right, now, thank you very much, ladies and gentleman, I’m afraid I shall have to be getting on.”

“闭嘴。”说完这话，那个灵魂就离开了，“很感人，不是吗？好了，女士们还有这位先生，十分感谢。我恐怕要继续工作了。”

“H-hello?” said Madame Tracy in another voice. Mrs. Ormerod started. It sounded exactly like Ron. On previous occasions Ron had sounded like Madame Tracy.

“你…你好？”特蕾西夫人用另一种声音说。奥默罗德夫人吓了一跳。这声音听起来正是罗恩。前几次罗恩听起来像是特蕾西夫人。

“Right. Now I’ve quite a bit to tell you. For a start I went to our Krystal’s wedding, last Saturday, our Marilyn’s eldest…”

“好的。我有好多话要对你说。首先我去了克莉丝托的婚礼，就在上周六，咱们玛丽琳的大女儿…”

“Buh-Beryl. You-you nuh-never let me guh-get a wuh-word in edgewise wuh-while I was alive. Nuh-now I’m duh-dead, there’s juh just one thing to suh-say…”

“贝、贝里尔。我活着的时候，你、你从、从来没让我插上过一句话。现、现在我死了，只有一、一句话要说…”

Beryl Ormerod was a little disgruntled by all this. Previously when Ron had manifested, he had told her that he was happier beyond the veil, and living somewhere that sounded more than a little like a celestial bungalow. Now he sounded like Ron, and she wasn’t sure that was what she wanted. And she said what she had always said to her husband when he began to speak to her in that tone of voice.

这让贝里尔·奥默罗德有点不高兴。以前罗恩现身时，会告诉她自己在帷幕彼端过得不错，生活在某处很像是天国别墅的地方。现在他听起来就是罗恩，奥默罗德夫人不知道自己到底想要什么。她祭出了撒手锏，过去罗恩开始用这种语气讲话时，她常用这招。

“Ron, remember your heart condition.”

“罗恩，注意你的心脏病。”

“I duh-don’t have a huh-heart any longer. Remuhmember? Anyway, Buh-Beryl…?”

“我再也没、没有什么心、心脏了。记得吗？总之，贝里尔…？”

“Ron, is that you?”

“罗恩，是你吗？”

“Yes, Ron.”

“是的，罗恩。”

“Out!” she said.

“出去！”她说。

Madame Tracy stood up, went over to the door, and turned on the lights.

特蕾西夫人站起身，走到门口，打开灯。

“You haven’t heard the last of this, Marjorie Potts,” hissed Mrs. Ormerod, clutching her handbag to her breast, and she slammed the door.

“咱俩还不算完，马乔莉·帕兹。”奥默罗德夫人哑声说道。她把手袋抓在胸前，将房门使劲一摔。

Then her muffled voice echoed from the hallway, “And you can tell our Ron that he hasn’t heard the last of this either!”

接着她沉闷的声音又在走廊间响起。“你可以告诉罗恩，我跟他也不算完！”

Her sitters stood up, more than a little puzzled, and, in Mrs. Ormerod’s case, outraged, and they walked out into the hall.

她的客人们站起来，感觉莫名其妙。奥默罗德夫人显然是火冒三丈。他们走到门厅。

She lined up the cups on the table in front of her, and took a long sip from the tea-with-sugar.

她把两个杯子摆在自己面前，从加糖的那杯里喝了一大口。

Madame Tracy (and the name on her scooters — only driving license was indeed Marjorie Potts) went into the kitchen and turned off the sprouts.

特蕾西夫人（她在小型摩托车驾驶执照上的名字的确是马乔莉·帕兹）走进厨房，把炖甘蓝的火关掉。

She put on the kettle. She made herself a pot of tea. She sat down at the kitchen table, got out two cups, filled both of them. She added two sugars to one of them. Then she paused.

她把水壶放上，给自己煮了一壶茶，随即坐在厨房桌子前，拿出两个杯子，把茶水倒上。她在其中一个杯子里加了两勺糖，然后稍等片刻。

“Now,” she said, in a voice that anyone who knew her would have recognized as her own, although they might not have recognized her tone of voice, which was cold with rage. “Suppose you tell me what this is about. And it had better be good.”

“好了。”所有认识特蕾西的人都能辨认出这是她的声音，但他们也许认不出这种腔调，蕴含着森寒怒火的腔调。“我想你应该说说到底是怎么回事。你最好找个好理由。”

“No sugar for me, please,” said Madame Tracy.

“我不加糖，谢谢。”特蕾西夫人说。

“I told you. They fell from the sky. One minute I’m driving along at sixty, next second, whap! a twelve-pound salmon smashes through the windscreen. So I pulls the wheel over, and I skidded on that,” he pointed to the remains of a hammerhead shark under the lorry, “and ran into that.” That was a thirty-foot-high heap of fish, of different shapes and sizes.

“我说过了。它们是从天上掉下来的。上一分钟我还在以六十英里的时速开车，下一秒钟，啪！一条十二磅的大马哈鱼砸碎了挡风玻璃。于是我赶紧拐弯，从那东西上面碾了过去。”他指着卡车下面一条锤头鲨鱼的遗骸说，“然后撞上了那个。”那是一堆三十英尺高的鱼，大大小小，各式各样。

“Have you been drinking, sir?” asked the sergeant, less than hopefully.

“你喝酒了吗，先生？”警长不抱什么希望地问。

“So what I want to know is, where did all the fish come from?” asked the sergeant.

“那么我想知道的是，这些鱼是从哪儿来的？”警长说。

A lorry had shed its load all over the M6. According to its manifest the lorry had been filled with sheets of corrugated iron, although the two police patrolmen were having difficulty in accepting this.

一辆大货车把整车的货物卸在M6公路上。根据载货单显示，车里装的都是波纹状钢，但两名巡警很难接受这种说法。

On the top of the pile a rather large octopus waved a languid tentacle at them. The sergeant resisted the temptation to wave back.

在鱼堆顶端，一只很大的章鱼冲他们懒洋洋地挥舞着触须。警长压抑住向它挥手的冲动。

“Course I haven’t been drinking, you great wazzock. You can see the fish, can’t you?”

“我当然没喝酒，你这蠢货。你能看见那堆鱼，对吧？”

The police constable was leaning into the police car, talking on the radio. “… corrugated iron and fish, blocking off the southbound M6 about half a mile north of junction ten. We’re going to have to close off the whole southbound carriageway. Yeah.”

另一名警员把身子探进警车，正冲着对讲机说：“…波纹状钢和鱼，在距离十号路口一英里的地方，堵塞了M6号公路向南的道路。我们必须关闭所有南向车道。对。”

Newt raised his voice. “I mean, it was really wonderful. Really really wonderful. I always hoped it was going to be, and it was.”

牛顿提高声音说：“我的意思是说，真的很棒。真的真的棒极了。我一直希望会是这样，结果真是这样。”

“That was wonderful,” said Newt.

“太棒了。”牛顿说。

“What are you doing?” he asked.

“你在干什么？”他问。

“Good,” said Anathema. “The earth moved for everybody.” She got up off the floor, leaving her clothes scattered across the carpet, and went into the bathroom.

“哦。”安娜丝玛说，“对谁来说都是前所未有的体验。”她站起来，没有理会散落在地毯上的衣服，直接走进浴室。

There was the sound of running water.

屋里传来一阵流水声。

“Tell you what,” said Newt, as Anathema came out of the bathroom swathed in a fluffy pink towel. “We could do it again.”

“我跟你说。”安娜丝玛裹着条蓬松的粉浴巾，从浴室走出来时，牛顿说道，“咱们可以再做一次。”

“Ah.” He wondered vaguely if everyone had to shower afterwards, or if it was just women. And he had a suspicion that bidets came into it somewhere.

“啊。”他下意识地猜测着，是所有人事后都要洗个澡，抑或只有女人需要。另外他还有种跟下体洗浴盆相关的猜想。

The rain redoubled. A small trout, which had miraculously survived the fall, gamely began to swim toward Birmingham.

雨下得更大了。一条从天而降的小鲑鱼奇迹般地活了下来，正不屈不挠地朝伯明翰游去。

“Taking a shower.”

“洗澡。”

“Nope,” she said, “not now.” She finished drying herself, and started picking up clothes from the floor, and, unselfconsciously, pulling them on. Newt, a man who was prepared to wait half an hour for a free changing cubicle at the swimming baths, rather than face the possibility of having to disrobe in front of another human being, found himself vaguely shocked, and deeply thrilled.

“不行。”安娜丝玛说，“现在不行。”她已经擦干身体，从地板上捡起衣服，很自然地一件件穿好。牛顿宁可在室内游泳池里为免费换衣间等上半小时，也不愿面对在人前宽衣解带的可能性。他现在隐隐有些震惊，同时兴奋得几乎发抖。

Anathema shrugged, not an easy move when you’re pulling on a sensible black skirt. “She said we only did it this once.”

安娜丝玛耸耸肩，对一个正在穿黑长裙的人来说，这不是简单的动作。“她说咱们只做了一次。”

“Why not?” said Newt. He was about to point out that it might not take long, but an inner voice counseled him against it. He was growing up quite quickly in a short time.

“为什么不？”牛顿说。他本想指出可能花不了多长时间，但发自内心的声音告诫他别这么说。牛顿在短时间内成长得十分迅速。

Bits of her kept appearing and disappearing, like a conjurer’s hands; Newt kept trying to count her nipples and failing, although he didn’t mind.

安娜丝玛的身体时隐时现，仿佛魔术师的双手。牛顿试图数清她的乳头，可惜没有成功，但他也不在乎。

Newt read it and blushed and gave it back, tight-Tipped.

他读了读，脸一下红了，随即板着面孔把它递了回去。

It wasn’t simply the fact that Agnes had known, and had expressed herself in the most transparent of codes. It was that, down the ages, various Devices had scrawled encouraging little comments in the margin.

不光是因为艾格尼丝预见到了这件事，也不是因为她用最浅显的密语写了出来。主要是因为这些年来，许多仪祁家人在页边空白上写下的一段段祝词。

Anathema, fully dressed, walked over to her card index, pulled one out, and passed it to him.

安娜丝玛已经穿好衣服，她走到卡片匣前，抽出一张递给牛顿。

Newt opened his mouth two or three times, then said, “She didn’t. She bloody didn’t. She couldn’t predict that. I don’t believe it.”

牛顿张了两三次嘴，然后说：“不会的。绝对不会。她不可能预言到这个。我不信。”

She passed him the damp towel. “Here,” she said. “Hurry up. I’ve got to make the sandwiches, and we’ve got to get ready.”

安娜丝玛把湿毛巾递给他。“给。”她说，“快点。我做了三明治，咱们必须做好准备。”

He looked at the towel. “What’s this for?”

牛顿看着浴巾。“这是干什么？”

Ah. So it was something men and women both did. He was pleased he’d got that sorted out.

啊。如此说来，这是不分男女都要做的事。他很高兴自己搞清了这个问题。

“But you’ll have to make it quick,” she said.

“但你得加快速度。”安娜丝玛说。

In Shadwell’s dream, he is floating high above a village green. In the center of the green is a huge pile of kindling wood and dry branches. In the center of the pile is a wooden stake. Men and women and children stand around on the grass, eyes bright, cheeks pink, expectant, excited.

在沙德维尔的梦境中，他飘浮在一个绿意盈盈的小镇上空。绿地中央有很大一堆柴火和干树枝。柴堆中间戳着根木桩。男女老少都聚集在绿地周围，眼光发亮，脸颊发红，激动地期待着什么。

A sudden commotion: ten men walk across the green, leading a handsome, middle-aged woman; she must have been quite striking in her youth, and the word “vivacious” creeps into Shadwell’s dreaming mind. In front of her walks Witchfinder Private Newton Pulsifer. No, it isn’t Newt: The man is older, and dressed in black leather. Shadwell recognizes approvingly the ancient uniform of a Witchfinder Major.

人群中突然一阵骚动：有十个人从草地对面走来，后面跟着位相貌俊俏的中年妇女。她年轻时肯定很有魅力，“生机勃勃”这个词钻进了沙德维尔梦中的头脑。走在女子身前的是猎巫军二等兵牛顿·帕西法。不，不是牛顿。这人比较老，而且穿着一身黑皮衣。沙德维尔心满意足地发现这是古代猎巫军的少校制服。

“Your shower.”

“让你洗澡。”

“Oh no. We’ve got a couple of hours. It’s just that I’ve used up most of the hot water. You’ve got a lot of plaster in your hair.”

“哦，不。咱们还有几小时。不过我几乎用光了热水。你头发里有好多泥灰。”

“Why? Have we got to get out of here in the next ten minutes before the building explodes?”

“为什么？这座房子就要爆炸了，咱们必须在十分钟内离开。”

The storm blew a dying gust around Jasmine Cottage, and holding the damp pink towel, no longer fluffy, in front of him, strategically, Newt edged off to take a cold shower.

暴风雨在茉莉小屋周围卷起最后一阵旋风。牛顿拿着不再蓬松的粉色湿毛巾，挡在身前关键部位，向浴室蹭去，准备洗个凉水澡。

The woman climbs onto the pyre, thrusts her hands behind her, and is tied to the stake. The pyre is lit. She speaks to the crowd, says something, but Shadwell is too high to hear what it is. The crowd gathers around her.

女子爬上柴堆，把双手背到身后，让人捆在木桩上。柴堆被点燃。她冲围观的人群讲着什么，但沙德维尔位置太高，听不真切。人们越聚越拢。

That was thunder, thought Shadwell, as he woke up, with the unshakable feeling that someone was still staring at him.

原来是雷，沙德维尔醒来后心想，但被人注视的感觉还是挥之不去。

A crash of thunder.

一阵雷鸣。

And then it all goes boom.

接着是“轰”的一声。

The flames lick higher.

火苗越烧越高。

A witch, thinks Shadwell. They’re burning a witch. It gives him a warm feeling. That was the right and proper way of things. That’s how things were meant to be.

一个女巫，沙德维尔心想，他们在烧女巫。中士心里暖洋洋的。就是这么回事，这才对头。世界就该是这样。

And the woman looks up. She is staring straight at him, invisible though he is. And she is smiling.

女子抬起头。尽管沙德维尔认为自己是隐形的，但她还是直勾勾地注视着他，露出微笑。

Only she is going to die. She is going to burn to death. And, Shadwell realizes in his dream, it is a horrible way to die.

只是她会死。她会被烧死。而且，沙德维尔在梦中意识到，这是个可怕的死法。

Only…

只是…

He opened his eyes, and thirteen glass eyes watched from the various shelves of Madame Tracy’s boudoir, staring out from a variety of fuzzy faces.

他睁开眼，十三只玻璃假眼注视着他。那是特蕾西夫人闺房中各式柜架上的毛绒玩具。

She looks directly up at him now, and says “That goes for yowe as welle, yowe daft old foole.”

女子突然抬起头盯着他，开口说：“也包括你这个愚蠢的老傻瓜。”

He lit the cigarette. And he saw his right hand: the ultimate weapon. The doomsday device. He pointed one finger at the one-eyed teddy bear on the mantelpiece.

他点燃烟卷，正好看见自己的右手：终极武器。最终审判日的武器。他伸出一根手指，对准壁炉架上的独眼泰迪熊。

He looked away, and into the eyes of someone staring intently at him. It was him.

沙德维尔把头一转，发现有个人正全神贯注地盯着自己。而那人正是他自己。

Och, he thought in terror, I’m havin’ one o’ them out-o’-yer-body experiences, I can see mah ane self, I’m a goner this time right enough…

啊，他心惊胆战地想道，这是那种什么离魂体验。我能看见自己，这回可真叫失魂落魄了…

He made frantic swimming motions in an effort to reach his own body and then, as these things do, the perspectives clicked into place.

他拼命做出游泳的动作，试图靠近自己的身体。和故事中的常见情节一样，他的判断力很快恢复了正常。

He climbed out of the bed, pulled on his boots, and stood up, warily. Something was missing. A cigarette. He thrust his hands deep into his pockets, pulled out a tin, and began to roll a cigarette.

中士爬下床，穿上靴子，小心地站起来。似乎少了点什么。一根烟卷。他把手深深探入口袋，掏出一个小罐，开始卷烟。

Shadwell relaxed, and wondered why anyone would want to put a mirror on his bedroom ceiling. He shook his head, baffled.

沙德维尔松了口气，心想怎么会有人在卧室天花板上装镜子。他困惑地摇了摇头。

“Bang,” he said, and chuckled, dustily. He wasn’t used to chuckling, and he began to cough, which meant he was back on familiar territory. He wanted something to drink. A sweet can of condensed milk.

“邦！”他干巴巴地笑了起来。沙德维尔不习惯咯咯笑，所以很快开始咳嗽，这才是他熟悉的领域。他想来点喝的。一罐香甜炼乳。

He’d been dreaming, he knew. Shadwell didn’t remember the dream, but it made him feel uncomfortable, whatever it was.

我做了个梦，他心想。沙德维尔不记得自己的梦境，但不管梦到的是什么，都让他感觉怪不舒服的。

“Ach, ye beldame,” muttered Shadwell. She had one of her gentlemen callers in there, obviously.

“啧，侬这恶婆娘。”沙德维尔嘟囔道。她显然正跟一位绅士访客在一起。

Shadwell dropped his cigarette. He stretched out his arm, shaking slightly, and pointed his hand at Madame Tracy.

沙德维尔把烟卷扔在地上。他举起胳膊，微微颤抖着指向特蕾西夫人。

“To be frank, dear lady, my plans at this point are perforce somewhat fluid.”

“说实话，亲爱的夫人，这种情况下我的计划难免有些变动。”

Madame Tracy’s mouth opened, and a voice said, “Not just A Southern Pansy, Sergeant Shadwell. THE Southern Pansy.”

特蕾西夫人张开嘴，一个声音冒了出来。“不是某个娘娘腔南蛮子，沙德维尔中士。是‘那个’娘娘腔南蛮子！”

“Whom?” asked Madame Tracy.

“谁？”特蕾西夫人问道。

Madame Tracy looked up, and smiled at him. There wasn’t anyone else in the room.

特蕾西夫人抬起头，冲他微微一笑。屋里只有她一个人。

Shadwell’s blood ran cold. He marched through the bead curtain, shouting, “The sins of Sodom an’ Gomorrah! Takin’ advantage of a defenseless hour! Over my dead body!”

沙德维尔听得血液凝固。他迈步穿过珠帘，高声叫道：“索多玛和蛾摩拉的罪人啊！欺负无力抵抗的妓女！从俺的尸首上踏过去吧！”

“Whurrizee?” asked Shadwell.

“他在哪儿？”沙德维尔问道。

He stomped out of her boudoir, heading toward the kitchen.

他大步走出卧室，向厨房前进。

“So what exactly do you want me to do about this?” she was ask ing.

“那你到底想让我干什么？”她问道。

“Some Southern pansy,” he said, “I heard him. He was in here, suggestin’ things to yer. I heard him.”

“某个娘娘腔南蛮子。”他说，“俺听见他叨叨了。就跟这儿，向侬暗示着什么。俺听得真真的。”

Madame Tracy would have some.

特蕾西夫人应该有些。

Outside the little kitchen he paused. She was talking to someone. A man.

沙德维尔在小厨房外停下脚步。特蕾西夫人正跟什么人说话。一个男人。

“No,” said Madame Tracy, in the voice of the demon. “Now, I know what you’re thinking, Sergeant Shadwell. You’re thinking that any second now this head is going to go round and round, and I’m going to start vomiting pea soup. Well, I’m not. I’m not a demon. And I’d like you to listen to what I have to say.”

“不。”特蕾西夫人用恶魔的声音说，“好吧，我知道你在想什么，沙德维尔中士。你在想这个脑袋随时可能一圈圈旋转，然后开始吐豌豆浓汤，就像《驱魔人》里那样。好吧，我不会的。我不是恶魔。另外，我希望你仔细听听我要说的话。”

“Daemonspawn, be silent,” ordered Shadwell. “I’ll no listen to yer wicked lies. Do yer know what this is? It’s a hand. Four fingers. One thumb. It’s already exorcised one of yer number this morning. Now get ye out of this gud wimmin’s head, or I’ll blast ye to kingdom come.”

“恶魔，闭嘴。”沙德维尔喝令道，“俺可不想听侬瞎咧咧。侬晓得这是甚吗？是一只手。小指、无名指、中指、食指和拇指。今儿晌午，它已经除掉你的一个同类。侬赶紧滚出这位女士的脑袋瓜，不让俺把侬就轰到天国去。”

“Demon,” he croaked.

“恶魔。”他嘶哑地说。

“I’ll ne’r listen tae his hellish blandishments, woman,” said Shadwell.

“俺可不听他那来自地狱的哄骗，女人。”沙德维尔说。

Madame Tracy smiled at him. “You old silly,” she said.

特蕾西夫人冲他笑了笑。“老傻瓜。”她说。

“That’s the problem, Mr. Shadwell,” said Madame Tracy in her own voice. “Kingdom come. It’s going to. That’s the problem. Mr. Aziraphale has been telling me all about it. Now stop being an old silly, Mr. Shadwell, sit down, and have some tea, and he’ll explain it to you as well.”

“问题就在这儿，沙德维尔先生。”特蕾西夫人用自己的声音说，“天国正在降临。问题就在这儿。亚茨拉菲尔先生都跟我说了。现在别再搞得像个老傻瓜了，沙德维尔先生，坐下来，喝杯茶。他会给你解释清楚。”

He could have handled anything else.

沙德维尔什么都能对付，就是这个不行。

The swinging overhead signs proclaimed that the southbound carriageway was closed, and a small forest of orange cones had sprung up, redirecting motorists onto a co-opted lane of the northbound carriageway. Other signs directed motorists to slow down to thirty miles per hour. Police cars herded the drivers around like red-striped sheepdogs.

摇摇晃晃的高架标志宣告南向车道暂时关闭，一小片橙色交通锥森林已然树立起来，疏导机动车拐弯驶上北向车道。还有些标志要求机动车减速到五十。警车驱赶着来往车辆，就好像是群身上长有红色条纹的牧羊犬。

But he didn’t lower his hand.

但没有把手放下。

He sat down.

他坐在椅子上。

The four bikers ignored all the signs, and cones, and police cars, and continued down the empty southbound carriageway of the M6. The other four bikers, just behind them, slowed a little.

天启四车手没有理会这些标志、交通锥和警车，继续沿着空荡荡的M6公路南向车道行驶。另外的四车手就跟在后面，他们稍稍减速。

“Shouldn’t we, uh, stop or something?” asked Really Cool People.

“咱们，呃，要不要停下来什么的？”特别酷的人问。

“Yeah. Could be a pile-up,” said Treading in Dogshit (formerly All Foreigners Especially The French, formerly Things Not Working Properly Even When You’ve Given Them a Good Thumping, never actually No Alcohol Lager, briefly Embarrassing Personal Problems, formerly known as Skuzz).

“对。可能会撞车。”踩到狗屎说。他之前是所有外国人特别是法国佬，再之前是你使劲拍一下都不能正常工作的东西，从来不是无酒精啤酒，曾当过几分钟难言之隐，过去被人称作油泥。

“We’re the other Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse,” said G. B. H. “We do what they do. We follow them.”

“咱们是下一波天启四骑士。”重度伤害说，“他们怎么做，咱们就怎么做。跟上去。”

“It’ll be a world just for us,” said Adam. “Everything’s always been messed up by other people but we can get rid of it all an’ start again. Won’t that be great?”

“那是属于咱们的世界。”亚当说，“别人老把世界搞得乌七八糟，但咱们可以全部清空，从头再来。多棒啊！”

“You are, I trust, familiar with the Book of Revelation?” said Madame Tracy with Aziraphale’s voice.

“我相信，你肯定熟悉《启示录》吧？”特蕾西夫人用亚茨拉菲尔的声音说。

They rode south.

他们向南方驶去。

“The Antichrist is alive on earth at this moment, Sergeant. He is bringing about Armageddon, the Day of Judgement, even if he himself does not know it. Heaven and Hell are both preparing for war, and it’s all going to be very messy.”

“敌基督此刻就生活在地球上，中士。他会引发世界末日大决战，审判之日，尽管他自己并不知道这些。天堂和地狱都已做好开战的准备，场面会很难看。”

“Then you have heard of the Antichrist?”

“那么你听说过敌基督了？”

“Aye,” said Shadwell, who wasn’t. His biblical expertise began and ended with Exodus, chapter twenty-two, verse eighteen, which concerned Witches, the suffering to live of, and why you shouldn’t. He had once glanced at verse nineteen, which was about putting to death people who lay down with beasts, but he had felt that this was rather outside his jurisdiction.

“嗯。”沙德维尔说。他在撒谎。他的《圣经》知识仅限于《出埃及记》的第二十二章十八节，其中提到了女巫，讲到她们谋生的艰难，以及你为何不该干这行。他还瞟了一眼第十九节，里面写到要把跟野兽睡觉的人弄死。沙德维尔认为这完全超出了他的职权范围。

“Aye,” said Shadwell, who had seen a film once which explained it all. Something about sheets of glass falling off lorries and slicing people’s heads off, as he recalled. No proper witches to speak of. He’d gone to sleep halfway through.

“嗯。”沙德维尔说。他曾看过一个叫《凶兆》的老片子，里面讲得清清楚楚。他记得就是从大货车上掉下来一堆玻璃板，削掉别人的脑袋。根本没提到正经的女巫。他看了一半就睡着了。

“I am not actually permitted to act directly in this matter, Sergeant. But I am sure that you can see that the imminent destruction of the world is not something any reasonable man would permit. Am I correct?”

“事实上，有关部门不许我直接干预此事，中士。但我相信你肯定明白，任何通情达理的人都不会允许这个世界就此毁灭。我说得对吗？”

Shadwell merely grunted.

沙德维尔只是嘟囔了一声。

“Then there is only one thing to be done. And you are the only man I can rely on. The Antichrist must be killed, Sergeant Shadwell. And you must do it.”

“只有一件事能够拯救世界。也只有你值得我信赖。敌基督必须被杀死，沙德维尔中士。这是你的职责。”

“Aye. S’pose,” said Shadwell, sipping condensed milk from a rusting can Madame Tracy had discovered under the sink.

“嗯。大概齐。”沙德维尔说着从特蕾西夫人在水池下面发现的一个锈迹斑斑的罐子里喝了口炼乳。

Shadwell frowned. “I wouldna know about that,” he said. “The witchfinder army only kills witches. ‘Tis one of the rules. And demons and imps, o’course.”

沙德维尔皱皱眉。“俺不晓得。”他说，“猎巫军只杀巫师。这是规章之一。当然，还有恶魔和小鬼。”

“But, but the Antichrist is more than just a witch. He — he’s THE witch. He’s just about as witchy as you can get.”

“但，但敌基督不仅是巫师。他，他是巫师的王。比你想象的更巫师。”

“Wud he be harder to get rid of than, say, a demon?” asked Shadwell, who had begun to brighten.

“他会不会比，嗯，恶魔更难驱除？”沙德维尔逐渐有了兴致。

“Not much more,” said Aziraphale, who had never done other to get rid of demons than to hint to them very strongly that he, Aziraphale, had some work to be getting on with, and wasn’t it getting late? And Crowley had always got the hint.

“难不了多少。”亚茨拉菲尔想驱除恶魔时，只需要强烈暗示出自己还有事儿，天色似乎已经不早了。克鲁利总能领会。

“Good,” said Aziraphale through Madame Tracy.

“很好。”亚茨拉菲尔通过特蕾西夫人说。

Shadwell looked down at his right hand, and smiled. Then he hesitated.

沙德维尔看看自己的右手，露出笑容，接着又犹豫起来。

The end justifies the means, thought Aziraphale. And the road to Hell is paved with good intentions. [This is not actually true. The road to Hell is paved with frozen door-to-door salesmen. On weekends many of the younger demons go ice-skating down it.] And he lied cheerfully and convincingly: “Oodles. Pots of them. His chest is covered with them — he makes Diana of the Ephesians look positively nippleless.”

只要目的正当，可以不择手段，亚茨拉菲尔心想。通向地狱的道路是由好意铺就。（这话其实不对。通向地狱的道路是用冰冻的上门推销员铺成。每到周末，就会有很多年轻的恶魔在上面溜冰。）他兴高采烈、言之凿凿地扯谎说：“很多。满满当当。他胸口长满了这东西。以弗所人那个好多胸脯的丰饶女神狄安娜，跟他比起来真是小巫见大巫。”

“This Antichrist — how many nipples has he?”

“这敌基督…他有多少乳头？”

“I wouldna know about this Diana of yours,” said Shadwell, “but if he’s a witch, and it sounds tae me like he is, then, speaking as a sergeant in the WA, I’m yer man.”

“俺不晓得侬那什么狄安娜。”沙德维尔说，“但如果他是巫师——俺估摸着他没跑儿，那么以猎巫军中士的名义起誓，俺听侬的了。”

“I’m not sure about this killing business,” said Madame Tracy herself. “But if it’s this man, this Antichrist, or everybody else, then I suppose we don’t really have any choice.”

“我不太赞同这种杀戮行为。”特蕾西夫人自己说，“但如果这个人，这个敌基督活着，其他人就都要死。那我看咱们也就别无选择了。”

“Exactly, dear lady,” she replied. “Now, Sergeant Shadwell. Have you a weapon?”

“没错，亲爱的女士。”她说道，“好了，沙德维尔中士。你有武器吗？”

Shadwell rubbed his right hand with his left, clenching and unclenching the fist. “Aye,” he said. “I have that.” And he raised two fingers to his lips and blew on them gently.

沙德维尔用左手揉了揉右手，又攥了攥拳头。“嗯。”他说，“俺有这个。”他抬起两根手指，放在唇上，然后轻轻一挥。

“Have you anything more, uh, substantial? How about the Golden Dagger of Meggido? Or the Shiv of Kali?”

“你没别的更，呃，实在的？比如美吉多的金匕首？或者迦梨女神的剃刀？”

“Now, dear lady,” said Aziraphale. “Itrust you have a reliable mode of transportation at your disposal.”

“好了，亲爱的夫人。”亚茨拉菲尔说，“我相信你肯定有便利可靠的交通工具吧？”

Shadwell shook his head. “I’ve got some pins,” he suggested. “And the Thundergun of Witchfinder-Colonel Ye-Shall-Not-Eat-Any-Living-Thing-With-The-Blood-Neither-Shall-Ye-Use-Enchantment-Nor-Observe-Times Dalrymple… I could load it with silver bullets.”

沙德维尔摇摇头。“俺有些大头针。”他说，“还有猎巫人上校汝不可吃任何带血食物亦不可施魔法或遵守时间·达里波的专用雷电枪…俺可以装上银子弹。”

“Garlic?”

“大蒜？”

“That’s werewolves, I believe,” said Aziraphale.

“那是对付狼人的，我想。”亚茨拉菲尔说。

Shadwell shrugged. “Aye, week I dinna have any fancy bullets anyway. But the Thundergun will fire anything. I’ll go and fetch it.”

沙德维尔耸耸肩。“嗯，中。反正俺也没那些怪子弹了。但雷电枪可以发射任何东西。俺这就去拿。”

“Oh yes,” said Madame Tracy. She went over to the corner of the kitchen and picked up a pink motorbike helmet, with a yellow sunflower painted on it, and put it on, strapping it under her chin. Then she rummaged in a cupboard, pulled out three or four hundred plastic shopping bags and a heap of yellowing local newspapers, then a dusty day-glo green helmet with EASY RIDER written across the top, a present from her niece Petula twenty years before.

“哦，当然。”特蕾西夫人说。她走到厨房角落，拿起一个粉色摩托头盔，那上面还画着朵黄色向日葵。她戴上头盔，把皮带系在下巴上；然后又在一个碗橱里翻了半天，拿出三四百个塑料购物袋和一堆泛黄的本地报纸；最后是顶花里胡哨的绿头盔。表面积满灰尘，顶上写着“逍遥骑士”几个字。这是她侄女佩图拉二十年前送她的礼物。

“Vampires.”

“吸血鬼。”

He shuffled out, thinking, why do I need another weapon? I’m a man with a hand.

他拖着脚走出房间，心中暗想，俺还用得着武器？俺是个有手的人！

“Aye. ‘Tis a turrible weapon. It did for ye, daemonspawn, did it not?”

“对，这是件可怕的武器。它能除掉侬，恶魔余孽，对不？”

There was a pause. “Your hand?” asked Aziraphale.

屋里沉静片刻。“你的手？”亚茨拉菲尔最终说道。

Shadwell paled, muttered something inaudible, and put on the green helmet.

沙德维尔脸色发白，小声嘟囔一句，随后把绿头盔戴好。

Shadwell, returning with the Thundergun over his shoulder, stared at her unbelieving.

沙德维尔扛着雷电枪走回房间，惊诧地盯着特蕾西夫人。

“I said, De’il ding a divot aff yer wame wi’ a flaughter spade,” said Shadwell.

“俺说，愿魔鬼用利铲把你的肚子削掉。”沙德维尔说。

“I don’t know what you’re staring at, Mr. Shadwell,” she told him. “It’s parked in the road downstairs.” She passed him the helmet. “You’ve got to put it on. It’s the law. I don’t think you’re really allowed to have three people on a scooter, even if two of them are, er, sharing. But it’s an emergency. And I’m sure you’ll be quite safe, if you hold on to me nice and tight.” And she smiled. “Won’t that be fun?”

“我不知道你在看些什么，沙德维尔先生。”她说，“车就停在楼下路边。”她把头盔递给中士，“你得戴上头盔。这是法律。我想一辆轻型摩托车应该不允许载三个人，就算其中两个，呃，是同一人。但这是紧急情况。我保证你绝对不会有危险，只要紧紧抓住我就行了。”她笑了笑又说，“很有趣，不是吗？”

“That’ll be quite enough of that kind of language, Mr. Shadwell,” said Madame Tracy, and she marched him out of the hall and down the stairs to Crouch End High Street, where an elderly scooter waited to take the two, well, call it three of them away.

“粗话就到此为止吧，沙德维尔先生。”特蕾西夫人把他推到门厅，走出房门，来到伏尾区主干道，一辆老旧的小摩托车正等着他们俩。哦，应该说是他们仨。

The lorry blocked the road. And the corrugated iron blocked the road. And a thirty-foot-high pile of fish blocked the road. It was one of the most effectively blocked roads the sergeant had ever seen.

大货车封锁了道路。波纹状钢封锁了道路。三十英尺高的鱼堆封锁了道路。这是警长平生所见的最有效的道路封锁。

“What was that, Mr. Shadwell?” Madame Tracy looked at him sharply.

“你在嘀咕什么，沙德维尔先生？”特蕾西夫人瞪着他说。

“Any idea when the bulldozers are likely to get here?” he shouted into his radio.

“知道推土机什么时候能到吗？”他冲对讲机喊道。

He felt something tugging at his trouser cuff, and looked down.

他感觉有什么东西正在揪自己的裤腿，赶忙低头向下看去。

The rain wasn’t helping.

大雨也在添乱。

“Something wrong, Sarge?” asked the police constable, who was taking down the lorry driver’s details on the hard shoulder.

“出了什么事，警长？”正在隔离墩旁给卡车司机做笔录的警员问道。

“We’re crrrrk doing the best we crrrrk,” came the reply.

“我们噼里啪啦会尽快噼里啪啦。”对方说。

“Lobsters?” He gave a little skip, and a jump, and wound up on the top of the police car. “Lobsters,” he repeated. There were about thirty of them — some over two feet long. Most of them were on their way up the motorway; half a dozen had stopped to check out the police car.

“龙虾？”他先是一蹦，又是一跳，最后落在警车顶上，“龙虾。”他重复道。附近有三十多只龙虾，某些身长超过两英尺。大多数正沿着车道爬行，有六七只停下来观察着警车。

He sat on the top of the car, in the rain, and felt the water seeping into the bottom of his trousers.

他坐在雨中的车顶上，感觉屁股底下湿了一片。

“I just don’t like lobsters,” said the sergeant, grimly, shutting his eyes. “Bring me out in a rash. Too many legs. I’ll just sit up here a bit, and you can tell me when they’ve all gone.”

“我只是不喜欢龙虾。”警长闭着眼睛严肃地说，“会让我起疹子。那么多腿。我就在这儿坐会儿，等它们都走了你跟我说一声。”

There was a low roar. Thunder? No. It was continuous, and getting closer. Motorbikes. The sergeant opened one eye.

一阵低沉的呼啸声传来。打雷？不。这声音持续不断，而且逐渐靠近。摩托车。警长睁开一只眼。

(“Did you see that?” asked Really Cool People. “They flew right over it!”

（“你们看见了吗？”特别酷的人问，“他们飞过去了！”

Whoosh.

嗖。

Splat.

噗。

Thud. Thud. Thud.

砰。砰。砰。

Whoosh.

嗖。

There were four of them, and they had to be doing over a hundred. He was about to climb down, to wave at them, to shout, but they were past him, heading straight for the upturned lorry.

有四个人正向这边驶来，速度绝对超过一百。他正要爬下车，冲他们挥手、向他们喊叫。但这四个人已经开了过去，径直驶向底朝天的大卡车。

And a voice in his head that said, I’LL CATCH UP WITH THE REST OF YOU.

一个声音在他脑袋里响起，我会赶上你们的。

The police constable said, “They. They actually. They flew righ…”

警员说：“他们、他们的确、他们飞…”

“kin’ell!” said G. B. H. “If they can do it, we can too!”)

“见他妈的鬼。”重度伤害说，“他们能办到，咱们也行！”）

Jesus Christ!

基督耶稣！

There was nothing the sergeant could do. He closed his eyes again, and listened for the collision. He could hear them coming closer. Then:

警长已经无能为力了。他又闭上眼，等待撞击声。警长能听到他们迅速靠近，接着：

There was another rain of fish, although of shorter duration, and more easily explicable. A leather jacketed arm waved feebly from the large pile of fish. A motorbike wheel spun hopelessly.

又是一场鱼雨，不过这次持续时间很短，而且也很容易解释。一条套在皮夹克里的胳膊在一大堆鱼下面无力地挥舞着。一个摩托轮子正绝望地转动。

Whoosh.

嗖。

The sergeant opened his eyes. He turned to the police constable and opened his mouth.

警长睁开眼，扭头望向警员，嘴张得老大。

That was Skuzz, semi-conscious, deciding that if there was one thing he hated even more than the French it was being up to his neck in fish with what felt like a broken leg. He truly hated that.

那是迷迷糊糊的油泥。他刚想到，如果说有什么东西比法国人更可恨，那就是被鱼埋到脖子，感觉上还断了条腿。他真是恨死这玩意儿了。

“Listen,” croaked Skuzz. “Got something important to tell you. The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse… they’re right bastards, all four of them.”

“听着，”油泥嘶哑地说，“有件重要的事要告诉你。天启四骑士…他们真操蛋，四个都是。”

Later, when they’d dragged him out of the fish pile, and he’d seen the other three bikers, with the blankets over their heads, he realized it was too late to tell them anything.

后来，当人们把他从鱼堆里揪出来时，油泥看到另外三名车手，毯子遮住了他们的头。他意识到现在说什么都晚了。

That was why they hadn’t been in that Book of Revelations Pigbog had been going on about. They’d never made it that far down the motorway.

怪不得他们没出现在猪粪总在唠叨的那本《启示录》里。他们的公路之旅到此为止了。

Skuzz muttered something. The police sergeant leaned over. “Don’t try to speak, son,” he said. “The ambulance’ll be here soon.”

油泥嘟囔着什么。警长探过身来。“别说话，孩子。”他说，“救护车马上就到。”

“I’m sodding not. I’m People Covered In Fish,” croaked Skuzz, and passed out.

“别他妈胡扯。我是被鱼埋住的人。”油泥说完这句话，就昏了过去。

He wanted to tell G. B. H. about his new role; but he couldn’t move. Something wet and slippery slithered up one sleeve.

他想跟重度伤害说一声自己的新角色，但又不能移动。某种又湿又滑的东西正顺着袖子往上钻。

“He’s delirious,” announced the sergeant.

“他神志不清了。”警长说。

This has nothing to do with influences, demonic or angelic. It’s more to do with geography, and history, and architecture.

无论天使还是恶魔，都与此事无关。它主要跟地理学、历史学和建筑学有关。

The London traffic system is many hundreds of times more complex than anyone imagines.

伦敦的交通系统比人们想象中要复杂数百倍。

Mostly this works to people’s advantage, although they’d never believe it.

交通系统通常是为了给人们提供便利，不过所有人都不相信。

London was not designed for cars. Come to that, it wasn’t designed for people. It just sort of happened. This created problems, and the solutions that were implemented became the next problems, five or ten or a hundred years down the line.

伦敦不是为机动车设计的。话说回来，它就不是为人类设计的。它就这么诞生了。问题也由此出现，而解决方案又会引发新的问题，在五年、十年或者一百年后对人们造成困扰。

The latest solution had been the M25: a motorway that formed a rough circle around the city. Up until now the problems had been fairly basic — things like it being obsolete before they had finished building it, Einsteinian tailbacks that eventually became tailforwards, that kind of thing.

最近的解决方案是M25公路：大致成环形绕城一周的高速路。到目前为止问题都很普通：比方说还没完工就被荒废，或者超级堵车长龙最终套成了圈，诸如此类的玩意儿。

Cars, in theory, give you a terrifically fast method of traveling from place to place. Traffic jams, on the other hand, give you a terrific opportunity to stay still. In the rain, and the gloom, while around you the cacophonous symphony of horns grew ever louder and more exasperated.

车辆，从理论上说，为你提供了以极快的速度从甲地到达乙地的方法。另一方面，交通拥堵为你提供了老实待着的最佳时机。待在这阴沉沉的大雨中，周围难听的喇叭交响曲声音越来越大、越来越愤怒。

The current problem was that it didn’t exist; not in normal human spatial terms, anyway. The tailback of cars unaware of this, or trying to find alternate routes out of London, stretched into the city center, from every direction. For the first time ever, London was completely gridlocked. The city was one huge traffic jam.

但现在的问题在于，这条路并不存在，至少在人类的空间概念中不存在。堵塞的车队没有意识到这一点，或是应该寻找其他道路离开伦敦。它们在市中心的所有方向上排起长龙。伦敦有史以来第一次被彻底锁死。整个城市就是个大型交通拥堵。

Crowley was getting sick of it.

克鲁利受不了了。

And that was where it all fell apart.

他的思路在这儿断了线。

He might just as well find a nice little restaurant and get completely and utterly pissed out of his mind while he waited for the world to end.

7）在等待世界末日期间，他也许应该找个不错的小旅店，喝他个酩酊大醉。

It was going to happen in Tadfield. Or to begin there, at any rate. After that it was going to happen everywhere.

3）它将在塔德菲尔德上演。至少是从那里开始，然后扩展到全世界。

His conclusions could be summarized as follows:

他的结论归纳如下：

All was black, gloomy and awful. There was no light at the end of the tunnel — or if there was, it was an oncoming train.

6）一切都显得黑暗、阴沉、可怕。通道对面没有光亮，就算有也是迎面而来的火车。

Because, underneath it all, Crowley was an optimist. If there was one rock-hard certainty that had sustained him through the bad times — he thought briefly of the fourteenth century — then it was utter surety that he would come out on top; that the universe would look after him.

因为说到底，克鲁利是个乐观主义者。如果说有种坚定不移的信仰帮他熬过了坏年景——他一度想到十四世纪，那就是坚信自己终将时来运转的信念。这个世界会关照他的。

He’d taken the opportunity to reread Aziraphale’s notes, and to thumb through Agnes Nutter’s prophecies, and to do some serious thinking.

他利用这个机会，重读了一遍亚茨拉菲尔的笔记，又翻了翻艾格尼丝·风子的预言书，并进行了严肃认真的思考。

Aziraphale was — as far as could be estimated — out of the equation.

5）据他估计，亚茨拉菲尔已经指望不上了。

And yet…

8）可是…

Armageddon was under way.

1）末日之战即将到来。

There was nothing Crowley could do about this.

2）克鲁利对此无能为力。

Crowley was in Hell’s bad books. [Not that Hell has any other kind.]

4）克鲁利上了地狱的黑名单。（地狱也只有这一种名单。）

It was all a matter of being in the right place at the right time.

你只需要在正确的时间到达正确的地点。

Crowley tossed the book into the passenger seat. Desperate times, desperate measures: he had maintained the Bentley without a scratch for sixty years.

克鲁利把书扔到副驾驶座上。非常时期，非常手段。六十多年来，他一直小心保养着宾利车，连一道划痕都未曾有过。

The right place was Tadfield. He was certain of that; partly from the book, partly from some other sense: in Crowley’s mental map of the world, Tadfield was throbbing like a migraine.

克鲁利可以肯定，正确的地点是塔德菲尔德。一方面是因为预言书，另一方面是因为别的感觉：在克鲁利脑海中的世界地图上，塔德菲尔德正像偏头疼似的跳动。

The right time was getting there before the end of the world. He checked his watch. He had two hours to get to Tadfield, although probably even the normal passage of Time was pretty shaky by now.

正确的时间是赶在世界末日之前。克鲁利看看手表。他需要两个小时才能达到塔德菲尔德，不过时间的正常通路此刻八成已经动摇。

What the hell.

见鬼去吧。

Okay, so Hell was down on him. So the world was ending. So the Cold War was over and the Great War was starting for real. So the odds against him were higher than a vanload of hippies on a blotterful of Owlsley’s Old Original. There was still a chance.

好吧，就算地狱要找他的麻烦。就算世界即将终结。就算冷战结束，大战即将上演。就算失败概率比一车灌饱了黄汤的醉鬼还高。但机会总还是有的。

He turned on his lights, and sounded his horn.

他打开车灯，按响喇叭。

He reversed suddenly, causing severe damage to the front of the red Renault 5 behind him, and drove up onto the pavement.

克鲁利突然倒车，给后面的红色雷诺前端造成严重损害，然后开上便道。

That should give any pedestrians sufficient warning that he was coming. And if they couldn’t get out of the way… well, it’d all be the same in a couple of hours. Maybe. Probably.

这足以让行人们注意到一辆车正在靠近。如果他们来不及避开…好吧，反正过几小时也都一样。也许。可能。大概吧。

The ten people sat there, hour after hour, cajoling, pleading, promising through plastic smiles. Between calls they made notations, sipped coffee, and marvelled at the rain flooding down the windows. They were staying at their posts like the band on the Titanic. If you couldn’t sell double glazing in weather like this, you couldn’t sell it at all.

十个人夜以继日地坐在这里，皮笑肉不笑地哄骗着、恳求着、许诺着。在两通电话之间，他们会做笔记、喝咖啡、对在窗户上奔流而下的雨水感到惊奇。他们就像泰坦尼克号上的乐队成员一样坚守岗位。如果你在这种天气还卖不掉双层玻璃窗，那就永远也卖不掉。

Most of them weren’t.

多数人都没有。

“Heigh ho,” said Anthony Crowley, and just drove anyway.

“嘿吼。”安东尼·克鲁利说着向前驶去。

There were six women and four men, and each of them had a telephone and a thick wodge of computer printout, covered with names and telephone numbers. By each of the numbers was a penned notation saying whether the person dialed was in or out, whether the number was currently connected, and, most importantly, whether or not anybody who answered the phone was avid for cavity-wall insulation to enter their lives.

屋里坐着六个女人四个男人，每人面前都有一部电话和厚厚一沓打印纸，上面印满了名字和电话号码。每个号码后面都用铅笔注明了此人有没有接听、这个号码是否还在使用，另外最重要的是，接电话的人有没有兴趣让空心墙隔音隔热材料进入他们的生活。

She put down the phone.

她挂上电话。

Lisa Morrow was saying, “… Now, if you’ll only let me finish, sir, and yes, I understand that, sir, but if you’ll only…” and then, seeing that he’d just hung up on her, she said, “Well, up yours, snot-face.”

莉萨·墨罗正在说：“…那么如果您能让我说完，先生。是的，我理解，先生，但如果您能让…”接着考虑到对方已经挂断电话，她继续说，“好吧，去你妈的，鼻涕虫。”

“I got another bath,” she announced to her fellow telephone salespersons. She was well in the lead in the office daily Getting People Out of the Bath stakes, and only needed two more points to win the weekly Coitus Interruptus award.

“我又碰到个洗澡的。”她对电话销售员们说。她在每日的“让别人离开浴室”赌盘上遥遥领先，另外只差两点就能赢得每周的“打断交媾奖”。

She dialed the next number on the list.

莉萨拨了清单上的下一个号码。

Lisa had never intended to be a telephone salesperson. What she really wanted to be was an internationally glamorous jet-setter, but she didn’t have the O-levels.

她没想过要当电话推销员。她真正想干的是魅力四射的国际名流，可惜没考上大学。

Had she been studious enough to be accepted as an internationally glamorous jet-setter, or a dental assistant (her second choice of profession), or indeed, anything other than a telephone salesperson in that particular office, she would have had a longer, and probably more fulfilled, life.

如果她当年多用点功，当上魅力四射的国际名流，或者牙医助手（她的第二位职业选择），或者说实在话，除了在这间办公室里当电话推销员以外的任何工作，都能活得更长，可能也更充实。

Perhaps not a very much longer life, all things considered, it being the Day of Armageddon, but several hours anyway.

当然，也许长不了多少。今天是世界末日，还剩几个小时。

But she had dialed. And she had waited while it rang four times. And she had said, “Oh, pout, another ansaphone,” and started to put down the handset.

但她已经打了。莉萨等着铃响四声，然后说：“哦，该死，又是个答录机。”她准备放下听筒。

For that matter, all she really needed to do for a longer life was not ring the number she had just dialed, listed on her sheet as the Mayfair home of, in the best traditions of tenth-hand mail-order lists, Mr. A. J. Cowlley.

说到底，她如果想活得更长，所要做的只是别打现在这个号码。这个名字以伦敦上流人士的身份，列在最传统的十手邮购清单上。A.J。寇鲁利先生。

But then something climbed out of the earpiece. Something very big, and very angry.

但某种东西从耳机爬了出来。某种很大，还很愤怒的东西。

It looked a little like a maggot. A huge, angry maggot made out of thousands and thousands of tiny little maggots, all writhing and screaming, millions of little maggot mouths opening and shutting in fury, and every one of them was screaming “Crowley.”

它有点像蛆。由成千上万小蛆虫组成的巨大愤怒的蛆。它们扭动着，尖叫着。数百万小蛆虫的嘴巴一张一合，同声嘶叫着一个名字：克鲁利。

It stopped screaming. Swayed blindly, seemed to be taking stock of where it was.

它停止叫喊，试探着扭摆身躯，似乎在观察自己的处境。

Then it went to pieces.

接着它土崩瓦解。

The thing split into thousands of thousands of writhing gray maggots. They flowed over the carpet, up over the desks, over Lisa Morrow and her nine colleagues; they flowed into their mouths, up their nostrils, into their lungs; they burrowed into flesh and eyes and brains and lights, reproducing wildly as they went, filling the room with a towering mess of writhing flesh and gunk. The whole began to flow together, to coagulate into one huge entity that filled the room from floor to ceiling, pulsing gently.

那东西分裂成无可计数的扭动着的灰色蛆虫。它们溢满地毯，超过桌面，淹没了莉萨·墨罗和她的九位同事。虫子冲进他们嘴中，涌入鼻子，爬进肺部；钻入他们的肌肤、眼球、大脑和内脏，同时迅速复制，顷刻之间就变成一堆翻滚着的黏稠灰肉，渐渐充满整个房间。它们开始聚集，凝结成一个微微脉动的巨大肉块，把这屋子塞得满满当当。

Spending half an hour trapped on an ansaphone with only Aziraphale’s message for company had not improved his temper.

在一部只有亚茨拉菲尔留言的电话答录机里困了半个小时，让他的坏脾气更加糟糕。

A mouth opened in the mass of flesh, strands of something wet and sticky adhering to each of the not-exactly lips, and Hastur said: “I needed that.”

肉堆里张开一张嘴，两片不成形的嘴唇上沾着许多潮湿发黏的东西。哈斯塔说：“这顿还不错。”

On the plus side, however, he at least knew what Aziraphale’s message was. The knowledge could probably buy him his continued existence.

但从好的方面来看，他至少知道了亚茨拉菲尔的口信。这个情报也许能让他逃过一劫。

The room filled with thick, sulphurous smoke. When it cleared, Hastur was gone. There was nothing left in the room but ten skeletons, picked quite clean of meat, and some puddles of melted plastic with, here and there, a gleaming fragment of metal that might once have been part of a telephone. Much better to have been a dental assistant.

房间中充满硫黄浓烟。烟雾散去后，哈斯塔已经消失了。这里只剩下十具骷髅，肉吃得特别干净。还有些塑料融成的水坑，闪亮的金属碎片散落四处，很可能曾是电话的一部分。当牙医助手会好得多。

Neither did the prospect of having to report back to Hell, and having to explain why he hadn’t returned half an hour earlier, and, more importantly, why he was not accompanied by Crowley.

同样糟糕的是返回地狱汇报任务的前景，他必须解释自己为什么迟到半小时，而且更重要的是，为什么没把克鲁利带回来。

And anyway, he reflected, if he were going to have to face the possible wrath of the Dark Council, at least it wouldn’t be on an empty stomach.

更何况，他心想，如果必须面对黑暗议会的熊熊怒火，至少不能当个饿死鬼。

Hell did not go a bundle on failures.

地狱可不怎么喜欢失败。

You wouldn’t have known it as the same car. There was scarcely an inch of it undented. Both front lights were smashed. The hubcaps were long gone. It looked like the veteran of a hundred demolition derbies.

你肯定看不出这是原来那辆车。几乎没有一寸完好的地方。前灯撞碎了。车轮盖早就没了。它就像经历过上百场撞车比赛的老兵。

But, to look on the bright side, all this only went to prove that evil contains the seeds of its own destruction. Right now, across the country, people who would otherwise have been made just that little bit more tense and angry by being summoned from a nice bath, or having their names mispronounced at them, were instead feeling quite untroubled and at peace with the world. As a result of Hastur’s action a wave of low-grade goodness started to spread exponentially through the population, and millions of people who ultimately would have suffered minor bruises of the soul did not in fact do so. So that was all right.

但如果从好的一面来看，这一幕只是证明了邪恶本身蕴含着毁灭的种子。在英国全境，有些人本可能被迫走出舒适的浴缸，或是听到自己的名字被人念错。但现在平静祥和、无忧无虑的心情，取代了紧张和愤怒。哈斯塔的行为营造出一股低度善良波，它正以指数趋势在人群中扩散。数百万人的灵魂得以避免产生轻度淤伤。所以说，这是好的。

The pavements had been bad. The pedestrian underpass had been worse. The worst bit had been crossing the River Thames. At least he’d had the foresight to roll up all the windows.

人行道路况很糟。地下通道路况更糟。最糟的是横穿泰晤士河。至少他提前想到关好所有窗户。

Still, he was here, now.

他最终来到此地。

Odegra. Nothing could cross it and survive.

Odegra。没有东西能活着穿过去。

In a few hundred yards he’d be on the M40; a fairly clear run up to Oxfordshire. There was only one snag: once more between Crowley and the open road was the M25. A screaming, glowing ribbon of pain and dark light. [Not actually an oxymoron. It’s the color past ultra-violet. The technical term for it is infrablack. It can be seen quite easily under experimental conditions. To perform the experiment simply select a healthy brick wall with a good run-up, and, lowering your head, charge. The color that flashes in bursts behind your eyes, behind the pain, just before you die, is infra-black.]

再往前几百码就是M40公路，那是直奔牛津郡的通衢大道。只有一个问题：M25环形高速路又挡在克鲁利和平坦大道之间。这条嘶吼闪烁的苦痛环带，散发着黑色光芒。（这并非矛盾修辞法，而是一种存在于紫外线之外的颜色。专业名词叫作“黑内线”。在实验条件下很容易观察到这种颜色。想要进行这一实验，你只需要找一面结实的砖墙，低下头，加速向它冲锋。在你双眼之下，疼痛之下迸出的光亮就是黑内线。你可以在临死前看个究竟。）

Nothing mortal, anyway. And he wasn’t sure what it would do to a demon. It couldn’t kill him, but it wouldn’t be pleasant.

至少凡间的东西不行。克鲁利不知道它会对恶魔产生什么影响。这条路可能杀不死他，但至少不是什么乐事。

There was a police roadblock in front of the flyover before him. Burnt-out wrecks… some still burning — testified to the fate of previous cars that had to drive across the flyover above the dark road.

一条警方路障横亘在他和立交桥之间。烧焦的残骸——有些还在燃烧——证实了之前想要通过黑路上方立交桥的众多车辆，最终运命何途。

The police did not look happy.

警方似乎不太高兴。

Crowley shifted down into second gear, and gunned the accelerator.

克鲁利换到二挡，一脚踩下油门。

Whatever the statistics were, they had just gone up by one.

不管现在的数据是多少，都要加一。

Cases of spontaneous human combustion are on record all over the world. One minute someone’s quite happily chugging along with their life; the next there’s a sad photograph of a pile of ashes and a lonely and mysteriously uncharred foot or hand. Cases of spontaneous vehicular combustion are less well documented.

人体自燃事件在全世界都有发生。上一分钟某人还高高兴兴地享受生活，下一分钟就只剩下凄凉的画面：一堆灰烬再加上孤零零一只未被烧灼的手或脚。但车辆自燃事件还很少有案可查。

He went through the roadblock at sixty. That was the easy bit.

他以一百公里的时速冲过路障。这部分还算容易。

[She had. It read:

（事实上，她说过：

The leather seatcovers began to smoke. Staring ahead of him, Crowley fumbled left-handedly on the passenger seat for Agnes Nutter’s Nice and Accurate Prophecies — moved it to the safety of his lap. He wished she’d prophecied this.

皮坐套开始冒烟。克鲁利目不转睛地正视前方，笨手笨脚地在副驾驶座上摸到《艾格尼丝·风子的精良准确预言书》，把它放到大腿上，避免被烧到。克鲁利真希望她预言过这件事。

Most of the family had gone along with Gelatly Device, who wrote a brief monograph in the 1830s explaining it as a metaphor for the banishment of Weishaupt’s Illuminati from Bavaria in 1785.]

大多数家族成员都赞同盖拉特里·仪祁的说法。他在十九世纪三十年代写了一篇小论文，解释说这则预言讲的是，维索兹创建的秘密组织光明会，在1785年被巴伐利亚当局驱逐。）

A street of light will screem, the black chariot of the Serpente will flayme, and a Queene wille sing quickfilveres songes no moar.

一条光路嘶吼尖叫，巨蛇的黑马车在烈火中燃烧，皇后再也无法唱起那轻快的小调。

Then the flames engulfed the car.

火焰吞噬了车子。

He had to keep driving.

他必须继续往前开。

Some police forces would believe anything. Not the Metropolitan police, though. The Met was the hardest, most cynically pragmatic, most stubbornly down-to-earth police force in Britain.

有些警察什么都信。但大都会警察不一样。他们是全英国最老辣、最实用主义、最固执己见、最冥顽不灵的警察。

It would take a lot to faze a copper from the Met.

想让大都会警察惊慌失措，可得花不少心思。

Thunder didn’t just rumble overhead, it tore the air in half.

雷电不仅在他们头顶轰鸣，它几乎撕裂了天空。

On the other side of the flyover was a further police roadblock, to prevent the passage of cars trying to come into London. They were laughing about a story that had just come over the radio, that a motorbike cop on the M6 had flagged down a stolen police car, only to discover the driver to be a large octopus.

高架桥对面还有一条警方路障，以防车辆从这条路进入伦敦。他们正被对讲机里传来的一条消息逗得哈哈大笑，据说有位摩托骑警在M6公路上拦下一辆被盗的警车，却发现司机是只大章鱼。

That would do it every time.

这招肯定灵。

It would take, for example, a huge, battered car that was nothing more nor less than a fireball, a blazing, roaring, twisted metal lemon from Hell, driven by a grinning lunatic in sunglasses, sitting amid the flames, trailing thick black smoke, coming straight at them through the lashing rain and the wind at eighty miles per hour.

比方说，一辆散了架的大车，差不多像个火球，或者说燃烧的吼叫的扭曲的来自地狱的金属柠檬，再加上一个戴墨镜的疯子，狞笑着坐在火团中，开着它以八十英里的时速穿过疾风暴雨，向他们直冲过来。

The quarry was the calm center of a stormy world.

采掘场是风暴世界平静的中心。

“Well, you divided up the world, right, and we’ve all of us got to have a bit — what bit’re you going to have?”

“你看，你把世界分了，对吧？我们每人都有一块，你要哪块？”

Adam’s mouth opened and shut.

亚当的嘴巴一张一合。

Pepper had been sitting staring at her knees.

佩帕坐在原地，盯着自己的膝盖。

There seemed to be something on her mind.

她似乎在考虑什么问题。

“What?” he said.

“什么？”他说。

The storm was replaced by a sudden, ringing silence.

风暴突然被响亮的寂静所取代。

“What?” said Adam.

“什么？”亚当说。

“Pepper’s right,” said Wensleydale. “Don’t seem to me there’s much left, if we’ve got to have all these countries.”

“佩帕说得对。”温斯利戴说，“在我看来，似乎没剩下多少了。所有国家都被我们分了。”

The silence sang like a harp, high and thin.

寂静犹如竖琴之声，高亢而尖锐。

“Yeah,” said Brian. “You never told us what bit you’re having.”

“对。”布赖恩说，“你没告诉我们，你要哪块？”

“I’ve got some more friends coming,” Adam repeated. “They’ll be here soon, and then we can really get started.”

“还有些朋友要来。”亚当又说了一遍，“他们马上就到，到时候咱们就可以开始动手了。”

Dog started to howl. It was no longer the siren howl of alone wolf, but the weird oscillations of a small dog in deep trouble.

狗狗吼了两声。不再是独狼令人毛骨悚然的长啸，而是一条倒霉的小狗发出的怪异颤音。

“What bit’re you going to have, Adam?” she said.

“你要哪块，亚当？”她说。

Adam stared at her. Dog had stopped howling and had fixed his master with an intent, thoughtful mongrel stare.

亚当盯着她。狗狗不再叫唤，它也用杂种狗的目光，全神贯注若有所思地盯着自己的主人。

Finally she looked up and stared Adam in the blank gray eyes.

女孩最终抬起头来，用黯淡无神的目光盯着亚当。

“What bit’s yours, Adam?” said Pepper.

“哪块是你的，亚当？”佩帕说。

“An’, an’ Lower Tadfield, and Norton, and Norton Woods –“

“还、还有下塔德菲尔德，还有诺顿，还有诺顿森林…”

They stared at him.

他们盯着他。

He stopped, his ears listening in horror to the words his mouth was speaking. The Them were backing away.

他愣住了，他的耳朵恐惧地聆听着嘴巴所说的话。“他们”慢慢向后退。

The silence went on and on, one note that could drown out the noises of the world.

寂静还在继续，它的一个音符就足以吞没整个世界的噪声。

“Oh, if that’s all that’s worryin’ you, don’t you worry,” said Adam airily, “‘cos I could make you all just do whatever I wanted –“

“哦，如果你们担心的就是这个问题，那没关系。”亚当轻松地说，“因为我可以让你们都按我的意思去…”

“Anyway, even if you did we’d all know,” said Pepper.

“就算你这么做，也得让我们知道。”佩帕说。

“M-me?” he said.

“我…我？”亚当说。

Adam’s gaze dragged itself across their faces.

亚当的目光从他们脸上爬过。

“They’re all I’ve ever wanted,” he said.

“我只想要这些地方。”他说。

His voice trailed off.

他渐渐没了声音…

“And you couldn’t make ’em better,” said Brian.

“而且你不能把它们变得更好。”布赖恩说。

They still stared.

他们还是盯着他。

“I can have ’em if I want,” said Adam, his voice tinged with sullen defiance and his defiance edged with sudden doubt. “I can make them better, too. Better trees to climb, better ponds, better…”

“我想要就能要。”亚当说，他的语气有种目空一切的沉郁感，而这感觉又突然略显动摇，“我可以让它们变得更好。有更好的树可以爬，更好的池塘，更好…”

“You can’t,” said Wensleydale flatly. “They’re not like America and those places. They’re really real. Anyway, they belong to all of us. They’re ours.”

“你不能。”温斯利戴平静地说，“它们不像美国和别的地方。它们是真实的。属于咱们所有人。塔德菲尔德是咱们的。”

They shook their heads.

他们摇摇头。

“But I’ll have Tadfield,” said Adam.

“但我有塔德菲尔德。”亚当说。

His body jerked. His head was thrown back. He raised his arms and pounded the sky with his fists.

他的身体猛地一抖，脑袋向后一仰。他抬起双臂，握紧拳头捶向天空。

It went on and on.

它毫不停歇。

And then it did.

接着它停止了。

“No, I dint mean it –” he began. “You’re my friends –“

“不，我不是这个意思…”他说，“你们是我的朋友…”

Adam’s face looked like an impersonation of the collapse of empire.

亚当的脸色仿佛在上演一个帝国的倾覆。

Dog put his paws over his head.

狗狗把爪子捂在头上。

They froze in mid-dash.

他们刚要跑，就定住了。

Adam stared.

亚当看着他们。

Adam’s head tilted down again. His eyes opened.

亚当把头低下来，睁开眼睛。

It resounded around the universe, which is a good deal smaller than physicists would believe. It rattled the celestial spheres.

它在宇宙间回响——这个宇宙比物理学家们料想的要小很多。它撼动了天球。

It spoke of loss, and it did not stop for a very long time.

它诉说着失落，很长时间没有停息。

Whatever had been standing in the old quarry before, Adam Young was standing there now. A more knowledgeable Adam Young, but Adam Young nevertheless. Possibly more of Adam Young than there had ever been before.

不管之前站在旧采掘场里的是什么东西，现在他只是亚当·扬。一个懂得更多的亚当·扬，但肯定是他没错。甚至比以前任何时候都更亚当·扬。

“No,” he said hoarsely. “No. Come back! I command you!”

“不。”他干涩地说，“不，回来！我命令你们！”

Something drained away.

某种东西渐渐枯竭。

His face twisted. The chalk floor cracked under his sneakers.

亚当面容扭曲。石灰地在他的运动鞋下裂出条条缝隙。

Adam opened his mouth and screamed. It was a sound that a merely mortal throat should not have been able to utter; it wound out of the quarry, mingled with the storm, caused the clouds to curdle into new and unpleasant shapes.

亚当张开嘴，尖叫起来。这声音不可能出自一个凡人的喉咙。它从采掘场蹿出，和风暴混在一处，将云层凝固成难看的新形状。

The ghastly silence in the quarry was replaced by a more familiar, comfortable silence, the mere and simple absence of noise.

采掘场中骇人的寂静，被更为舒适惬意的寂静所取代。它的成因仅仅是没有噪声。

The plumbing in Jasmine Cottage heaved and rattled and showered Newt with water that was slightly khaki in color. But it was cold. It was probably the coldest cold shower Newt had ever had in his life.

茉莉小屋里的水暖系统咕噜咕噜地喷洒出发黄的洗澡水，浇在牛顿身上。但水是凉的。可能比牛顿这辈子洗过的凉水澡都凉。

“There’s a red sky,” he said, when he came back. He was feeling slightly manic. “At half past four in the afternoon. In August. What does that mean? In terms of delighted nautical operatives, would you say? I mean, if it takes a red sky at night to delight a sailor, what does it take to amuse the man who operates the computers on a supertanker? Or is it shepherds who are delighted at night? I can never remember.”

“天色发红。”他说着走回房间，感觉有点烦躁，“在下午四点半。8月份。这意味着什么？用远洋水手的俗语该怎么说，你觉得呢？我的意思是，俗话说‘暮色红，水手喜’。那么想让在超级邮轮上操纵电脑的人高兴起来，需要什么天气？哦，是不是‘暮色红，牧人喜’来着？我记不清那个俗语了。”

“It’s all right,” said Adam quietly. “Pepper? Wensley? Brian? Come back here. It’s all right. It’s all right. I know everything now. And you’ve got to help me. Otherwise it’s all goin’ to happen. It’s really all goin’ to happen. It’s all goin’ to happen, if we don’t do somethin’.”

“没事了。”亚当平静地说，“佩帕？温斯利戴？布赖恩？回这边来吧。没事了，没事了。我现在什么都知道了。你们得帮我一把，不然一切都会发生。真的会发生。真的都会发生，如果咱们什么都不做的话。”

The freed Them cowered against the chalk cliff, their eyes fixed on him.

得到解放的“他们”畏缩地靠在白垩峭壁上，紧盯着亚当。

It didn’t do any good.

这个澡没什么用。

“I saw it on my way down here. And don’t snap like that. My head aches. I mean I saw it. They’ve got it written down outside that air base of yours. It’s got nothing to do with peas. It’s ‘Peace Is Our Profession.’ It’s the kind of thing they put up on boards outside air bases. You know: SAC 8657745th Wing, The Screaming Blue Demons, Peace Is Our Profession. That sort of thing.” Newt clutched his head. The euphoria was definitely fading. “If Agnes is right, then there’s probably some madman in there right now winding up all the missiles and cranking open the launch windows. Or whatever they are.”

“我到这儿来的途中看见了。你别这么嚷嚷，我头疼。我是说我看见了。就写在你们那个空军基地外面。这条跟花啊草的一点关系也没有。它说的是‘和平是我们的职业’。就是他们在空军基地外墙上写的那种话。比如说：皇家空军第8657745航空团，代号蓝色尖叫恶魔，和平是我们的职业。就是这种东西。”牛顿抓着自己的脑袋，欣悦感显然正在消退，“如果艾格尼丝没说错，那么很可能有某个疯子会装上所有导弹，打开发射窗口，或者其他什么东西。”

“I wouldn’t say that,” said Newt, his train of thought temporarily derailed. “Not actual blood. More pinkish. Probably the storm put a lot of dust in the air.”

“我不会这么说。”牛顿的思维列车暂时出轨了，“不像血。比较粉。可能是风暴卷起了很多灰尘。”

“What do you mean, you know what it means?”

“什么，你明白那条是什么意思了？”

Anathema eyed the plaster in his hair. The shower hadn’t got rid of it; it had merely dampened it down and spread it out, so that Newt looked as though he was wearing a white hat with hair in it.

安娜丝玛看着他头发里的灰泥。冷水澡没能把它洗掉，只是把它打湿展平，现在牛顿就好像顶着插有很多头发的白帽子。

“What are you doing?” he said.

“你在干什么？”他说。

“I don’t think you need to bother,” said Newt. “I know what the rest of 3477 means. It came to me when I –“

“我想你不用麻烦了。”牛顿说，“我知道第3477则是什么意思。我刚才…”

“Yes.” Anathema looked quizzically out of the broken window. “Would you say it’s blood-colored?” she said. “It’s very important.”

“是的。”安娜丝玛从破窗户向外望去，“你可以说这是血色吗？”她说，“这很重要。”

“You must have got quite a bump,” she said.

“你肯定撞得不轻。”她说。

“Trying to cross-reference. I still can’t be –“

“寻找交叉索引。我还是不能…”

Anathema was rummaging through The Nice and Accurate Prophecies

安娜丝玛翻找着《精良准确预言书》的卡片。

“No, that was when I hit my head on the wall. You know, when you –“

“不，这是我的脑袋撞在墙上时弄的。你知道，当你…”

“That’s just for transport planes and things. All they’ve got up there is communications gear. Radios and stuff. Nothing explosive at all.”

“只是为了起降运输机什么的。他们那儿只有通信设备，无线电之类的。没有任何能炸的东西。”

“Oh, Yes? I’ve seen films! Name me one good reason why you can be so sure.”

“哦，是吗？我在电影里看过！你为什么如此肯定？给我个理由。”

“There aren’t any bombs there. Or missiles. Everyone round here knows that.”

“那里什么炸弹、导弹都没有。附近所有人都知道。”

“No, there isn’t,” said Anathema firmly.

“不，不可能。”安娜丝玛坚定地说。

Newt stared at her.

牛顿盯着她。

“But it’s an air base! It’s got runways!”

“但那是空军基地！它有跑道！”

Look at Crowley, doing 110 mph on the M40 heading toward Oxfordshire. Even the most resolutely casual observer would notice a number of strange things about him. The clenched teeth, for example, or the dull red glow coming from behind his sunglasses. And the car. The car was a definite hint.

再看克鲁利，他正以一百八十公里的时速，沿M40公路向牛津郡狂奔。就连最不上心的路人，都会注意到他有些与众不同。比方说，紧咬的牙关，还有从墨镜后面透射出来的微微红光。再加上这辆车。车子是个明显的提示。

Crowley had started the journey in his Bentley, and he was damned if he wasn’t going to finish it in the Bentley as well. Not that even the kind of car buff who owns his own pair of motoring goggles would have been able to tell it was a vintage Bentley. Not any more. They wouldn’t have been able to tell that it was a Bentley. They would only offer fifty-fifty that it had ever even been a car.

克鲁利是坐在宾利车上开始这段旅程的，如果结束时他开着的不是宾利车就怪了。但即便那些自备驾车护目镜的狂热车迷，都认不出这是一辆古董宾利车。再也不是了。他们甚至很难看出这是辆宾利车，认出这是车的概率在50％。

The atmosphere in the quarry was friendlier now, but still intense.

采掘场中的气氛稍显和谐，但还是有点紧张。

There was a thin skin of crusted, melted rubber left around the metal wheel rims, but seeing that the wheel rims were still somehow riding an inch above the road surface this didn’t seem to make an awful lot of difference to the suspension.

金属轮缘上还留有一层融化的橡胶。但考虑到轮缘和地面尚有一英寸距离，轮胎问题对车辆悬挂系统倒是不会造成太大损害。

“You’ve got to help me sort it out,” said Adam. “People’ve been tryin’ to sort it out for thousands of years, but we’ve got to sort it out now.”

“你们得帮我把这件事理顺。”亚当说，“数千年来人们一直尝试把它理顺，但现在只能靠咱们了。”

There was no paint left on it, for a start. It might still have been black, where it wasn’t a rusty, smudged reddish-brown, but this was a dull charcoal black. It traveled in its own ball of flame, like a space capsule making a particularly difficult re-entry.

首先，车身上一点油漆都没有。没露出红褐色锈迹的地方，也许还是黑的，但却是那种阴沉的木炭黑。它带着一团火球行驶，仿佛是个艰难返回大气层的太空舱。

It was the effort of holding it together that was causing Crowley to grit his teeth, and the biospatial feedback that was causing the bright red eyes. That and the effort of having to remember not to start breathing.

克鲁利紧咬牙关，正是为了将它聚拢在一起。而由此引发的生物空间回馈作用，导致了绽放明亮红光的双眼。主要是为了把它聚拢在一起，另外还要记得别喘气。

It should have fallen apart miles back.

它早在几英里前就该散架了。

He hadn’t felt like this since the fourteenth century.

自从十四世纪以来，他从没有过这种感觉。

“You see, the thing is,” said Adam, “this thing is, it’s like — well, you know Greasy Johnson.”

“你们看，事情是这样的。”亚当说，“事情是这样的，就好像…嗯，你们知道戈里希·约翰逊。”

The Them nodded. They all knew Greasy Johnson and the members of the other gang in Lower Tadfield. They were older and not very pleasant. Hardly a week went by without a skirmish.

三个孩子点点头。他们都知道戈里希·约翰逊和下塔德菲尔德另一派人马。他们年纪较大，也不讨人喜欢。几乎每个礼拜都得干一架。

“Nearly always,” said Adam, “An’–“

“差不多。”亚当说，“而…”

They nodded helpfully.

他们点点头，表示理解。

“Well,” said Adam, “We always win, right?”

“好的。”亚当说，“总是咱们赢，对吧？”

“Nearly always,” said Wensleydale.

“差不多吧。”温斯利戴说。

“Oh, we’re better’n them,” said Pepper. “You’re right about that. We’re better’n them all right. We jus’ don’t always win.”

“哦，咱们比他们强。”佩帕说，“这话没错。咱们一直比他们强。但咱们的确不是总赢。”

“That doesn’t count,” said Adam. “They got told off just as much as us. Anyway, old folks are s’pposed to like listenin’ to the sound of children playin’, I read that somewhere, I don’t see why we should get told off ‘cos we’ve got the wrong kind of old folks –” He paused. “Anyway… we’re better’n them.”

“那不算。”亚当说，“他们挨的骂跟咱们一样多。再说了，大人应该喜欢听到孩子们玩耍的声音。我在什么地方读到过。我不明白为什么咱们要挨说，其实是那些大人们不对劲…”他顿了顿，“总之…咱们比他们强。”

“Just suppose,” said Adam, slowly, “that we could beat ’em properly. Get — get them sent away or somethin’. Jus’ make sure there’s no more ole gangs in Lower Tadfield apart from us. What do you think about that?”

“假设，”亚当缓缓说道，“咱们好好教训了他们一顿，把他们赶到别的地方去了。以后除了咱们，下塔德菲尔德再没有别的帮派。你们觉得怎么样？”

“More than half, anyway,” said Pepper. “‘Cos, you remember, when there was all that fuss over the ole folks’ party in the village hall when we –“

“反正超过百分之五十了。”佩帕说，“因为，你们记得吧，那次大人们在镇会堂聚会时，真够大惊小怪的，就因为咱们…”

The Them thought about this. Greasy Johnson had been a fact of life ever since they’d been old enough to hit one another with a toy railway engine. They tried to get their minds around the concept of a world with a Johnson-shaped hole in it.

“他们”认真考虑着。自从他们大到可以用玩具火车头互相敲打的时候起，戈里希·约翰逊就是生活中从未缺席的麻烦。他们试图想象缺了约翰逊形物体的世界。

“No. Jus’– jus’ gone away.”

“不。只是…只是被赶走了。”

“What, you mean he’d be… dead?” said Brian.

“什么，你是说他…会死？”布赖恩说。

Brian scratched his nose. “I reckon it’d be brilliant without Greasy Johnson,” he said. “Remember what he did at my birthday party? And I got into trouble about it.”

布赖恩挠挠鼻子。“我觉得没有戈里希·约翰逊就帅呆了。”他说，“记得他上次在我的生日聚会上干了什么吗？给我惹了不少麻烦。”

“I dunno,” said Pepper. “I mean, it wouldn’t be so interesting without ole Greasy Johnson and his gang. When you think about it. We’ve had a lot of fun with ole Greasy Johnson and the Johnsonites. We’d probably have to find some other gang or something.”

“我说不好。”佩帕说，“我是说，没有老戈里希·约翰逊和他的帮派，就没劲了。你们仔细想想，咱们在戈里希·约翰逊和那些约翰逊派小子身上找了不少乐子。咱们也许得去找些其他对手什么的。”

“Seems to me,” said Wensleydale, “that if you asked people in Lower Tadfield, they’d say they’d be better off without the Johnsonites or the Them.”

“在我看来，”温斯利戴说，“如果你问问下塔德菲尔德的人，他们会说没有约翰逊派或是‘他们’就最好不过了。”

Even Adam looked shocked at this. Wensleydale went on stoically: “The old folks” club would. An’ Picky. An’–“

听到这话，就连亚当也颇为震惊。温斯利戴固执地继续说道：“大人们会这么说。还有皮克牧师。还有…”

“But we’re the good ones…” Brian began. He hesitated. “Well, all right,” he said, “but I bet they’d think it’d be a jolly sight less interestin’ if we all weren’t here.”

“但咱们是好的那拨…”布赖恩犹豫片刻，继续说，“哦，好吧。但我打赌如果咱们不在这儿，他们肯定觉得没劲透了。”

“One of those blue ones,” said Brian, eventually, “saying ‘Adam Young Lived Here,’ or somethin’?”

“那种住在沙漠的，”布赖恩说，“背上长鼓包什么的。”

“Yes,” said Wensleydale. “That’s what I mean.”

“对。”温斯利戴说，“我就是这个意思。”

“People round here don’t want us or the Johnsonites,” he went on morosely, “the way they’re always goin’ on about us just riding our bikes or skateboarding on their pavements and making too much noise and stuff. It’s like the man said in the history books. A plaque on both your houses.”

“这附近的人不想要咱们或者约翰逊派。”他愁眉苦脸地说，“他们不喜欢咱们在人行道上骑自行车，或者玩滑板，还有噪音太大什么的。这就好像语文书里那个词。他们觉得咱们是一丘之骆。”

“What you’re all sayin’,” he summed up, in his best chairman tones, “is that it wouldn’t be any good at all if the Greasy Johnsonites beat the Them or the other way round?”

“你们就是想说，”他拿出最像样的主席腔总结说，“无论是戈里希·约翰逊打败了‘他们’，还是‘他们’打败了约翰逊都没好处？”

This met with silence.

这句话遭到了冷遇。

Normally an opening like this could lead to five minutes’ rambling discussion when the Them were in the mood, but Adam felt that this was not the time.

要是他们心情好，这句话会引发五分钟漫无边际的争论，但亚当觉得现在不是时候。

“That’s right,” said Pepper. “Because,” she added, “if we beat them, we’d have to be our own deadly enemies. It’d be me an’ Adam against Brian an’ Wensley,” She sat back. “Everyone needs a Greasy Johnson,” she said.

“没错。”佩帕说，“因为如果咱们打败了他们，就会变成自己的死对头。可能是我跟亚当对布赖恩跟温斯利。”她坐下来，“每人都需要一个戈里希·约翰逊。”她说。

“Yeah,” said Adam. “That’s what I thought. It’s no good anyone winning. That’s what I thought.” He stared at Dog, or through Dog.

“对。”亚当说，“我就是这么想的。谁赢都没好处。我就是这么想的。”他看着狗狗，或者说看着狗狗发愣。

Adam appeared to reach a decision.

亚当似乎做出了决定。

“Seems simple enough to me,” said Wensleydale, sitting back. “I don’t see why it’s taken thousands of years to sort out.”

“在我看来，这是很简单的事实。”温斯利戴坐下来说，“不明白为什么需要花好几千年才能想通。”

“That’s because the people trying to sort it out were men,” said Pepper, meaningfully.

“那是因为试图解决这个问题的都是男人。”佩帕意味深长地说。

“Don’t see why you have to take sides,” said Wensleydale.

“我就不明白干吗非得选择一方。”温斯利戴说。

“Of course I have to take sides,” said Pepper. “Everyone has to take sides in something.”

“当然得选一方。”佩帕说，“谁都要在某些事情上选择某一方。”

Putputputputputput, went Madame Tracy’s motor scooter down Crouch End High Street. It was the only vehicle moving on a suburban London street jammed with immobile cars and taxis and red London buses.

噗噗噗噗噗，特蕾西夫人的小摩托车行驶在伏尾区主干道上。在被机动车、出租车和红色伦敦公交车塞满的郊区街道，这是唯一还在移动的交通工具。

“Yes. But I reckon you can make your own side. I think you’d better go and get your bikes,” he said quietly. “I think we’d better sort of go and talk to some people.”

“对。但我认为你可以自己成为一方。我想你们最好去拿自行车。”他轻声说，“我想咱们最好去找某些人谈谈。”

“Quite possibly,” said Aziraphale. And then, “Mr. Shadwell, unless you put your arms round me you’re going to fall off. This thing wasn’t built for two people, you know.”

“很可能。”亚茨拉菲尔说，接着又补充了一句，“沙德维尔先生，你要是不抱紧我，就会摔下去的。你知道，这东西不是为两个人准备的。”

“I’ve never seen a traffic jam like it,” said Madame Tracy. “I wonder if there’s been an accident.”

“我从没见过塞车塞成这样。”特蕾西夫人说，“是不是出了什么交通事故？”

“Well, with just me on, the top speed is about fifteen miles an hour, but with Mr. Shadwell as well, it must be, ooh, about

“哦，如果只有我一个人，最高速度能达到二十五公里。但再加上沙德维尔先生，那肯定是，哦，大概…”

“Ye’ll have ter stop, then, so as I can adjust me weapon,” sighed Shadwell.

“那侬得把车靠边，俺要调整一下俺的武器。”沙德维尔叹道。

Shadwell sorted himself out, and put two grudging arms around Madame Tracy, while the Thundergun stuck up between them like a chaperon.

沙德维尔整理了一下装备，然后很不情愿地用手揽住特蕾西夫人，雷电枪就像个女伴护似的夹在他们中间。

“Because it seems to me that we would go slightly faster walking.”

“因为我觉得，咱们可能只比步行快一点。”

“Dear lady, how fast would you say we were going?” asked Aziraphale.

“亲爱的女士，你说咱们速度有多快？”亚茨拉菲尔说。

“Mr. Shadwell, I won’t tell you again.”

“沙德维尔先生，我不想再说一遍了。”

“Three,” muttered Shadwell, gripping the seat with one whiteknuckled hand, and his Thundergun with the other.

“仨。”沙德维尔嘟囔着。他一只手拿着雷电枪，另一只手紧紧抓住座子，指节都已经发白。

“Why?”

“怎么了？”

Madame Tracy found her eyes being moved down to the speedometer — rather foolishly, she thought, since it hadn’t worked since 1974, and it hadn’t worked very well before that.

她发现自己低下头，看了一眼速度计——真傻，她心想，因为这东西1974年就坏了，而且在那之前也不好使。

Madame Tracy giggled dutifully, but she pulled over to the curb, and stopped the motor scooter.

特蕾西夫人咯咯笑了两声，她靠向路边，将小摩托车停住。

They rode through the rain without talking for another ten minutes, putputputputput, as Madame Tracy carefully negotiated her way around the cars and the buses.

他们在风雨中骑行，十来分钟都没人说话。噗噗噗噗噗噗。特蕾西夫人小心翼翼地在轿车和公交车间寻觅路径。

“Four or five miles per hour,” she interrupted.

“七八公里每小时。”她打断了自己。

There was a cough from behind her. “Can ye no slow down this hellish machine, wumman?” asked an ashen voice. In the infernal pantheon, which it goes without saying Shadwell hated uniformly and correctly, Shadwell reserved a special loathing for speed demons.

身后传来一声咳嗽。“侬能把这鬼玩意儿开慢点吗，女人？”一个颤颤巍巍的声音问道。在阴间万灵殿中，沙德维尔最讨厌的就是速度之魔。当然他对普通款的恶魔也没什么好感。

“I suppose so,” she agreed.

“我想也是。”她表示赞同。

“In which case,” said Aziraphale, “We will get to Tadfield in something less than ten hours…”

“以这个速度，”亚茨拉菲尔说，“咱们可以在十小时内到达塔德菲尔德。”

“About forty miles.”

“大概六十公里。”

There was a pause from Madame Tracy, then, “How far away is this Tadfield, anyway?”

特蕾西夫人顿了一下，然后说：“说起来，这个塔德菲尔德有多远？”

“Um,” said Madame Tracy, who had once driven the scooter the few miles to nearby Finchley to visit her niece, but had taken the bus since, because of the funny noises the scooter had started making on the way back.

“啊。”特蕾西夫人说。她曾开着这辆小摩托，到数英里外的芬乞来路拜访侄女。但从那以后就改坐公交车了，因为这辆小车在返程途中，开始发出怪怪的噪声。

“… we should really be going at about seventy, if we’re going to get there in time,” said Aziraphale. “Hmm. Sergeant Shadwell? Hold on very tightly now.”

“…如果想及时赶到的话，咱们必须把速度提到一百一。”亚茨拉菲尔说，“嗯，沙德维尔中士？千万要抱紧。”

Putputputputput and a blue nimbus began to outline the scooter and its occupants with a gentle sort of a glow, like an afterimage, all around them.

噗噗噗噗噗噗，一团闪着柔光的蓝色晕环，如同残像一般，围绕在摩托车和它的乘客四周。

“Don’t look down, Sergeant Shadwell,” advised Aziraphale.

“别往下看，沙德维尔中士。”亚茨拉菲尔建议说。

“…” said Shadwell, eyes screwed tightly shut, gray forehead beaded with sweat, not looking down, not looking anywhere.

“…”沙德维尔紧紧闭住双眼，发白的额头上渗出汗珠。他没朝下看，没朝任何地方看。

In every big-budget science fiction movie there’s the moment when a spaceship as large as New York suddenly goes to light speed. A twanging noise like a wooden ruler being plucked over the edge of a desk, a dazzling refraction of light, and suddenly the stars have all been stretched out thin and it’s gone. This was exactly like that, except that instead of a gleaming twelve-mile-long spaceship, it was an off-white twenty-year-old motor scooter. And you didn’t have the special rainbow effects. And it probably wasn’t going at more than two hundred miles an hour. And instead of a pulsing whine sliding up the octaves, it just went putputputputput…

在每部高成本科幻片中，都有这么个片段：一艘跟纽约那么大的飞船突然加速到光速。随之而来的是“啪”的一声，好像木头尺子敲在桌子边缘；还有让人眼花缭乱的光线，群星瞬间变成细线，然后消失不见。现在的情况就是这样，只不过闪闪发光的二十公里长太空船变成了二十年车龄的白色老摩托。你也不会看到虹彩特效。另外它的时速可能刚到一百九十公里。而取代滑入八度音阶的脉冲尖啸声的是，噗噗噗噗噗噗…

“And off we go, then.”

“咱们这就走。”

Putputputputputput and the scooter lifted awkwardly off the ground with no visible means of support, jerking slightly, until it reached a height of five feet, more or less.

噗噗噗噗噗噗，摩托车在没有可见支持物的情况下，晃晃悠悠离开地面，略微抖动着升到大约五英尺的高度。

But it was exactly like that anyway.

但的确跟那种镜头一样。

Where the M25, now a screaming frozen circle, intersects with the M40 to Oxfordshire, police were clustered around in ever-increasing quantities. Since Crowley crossed the divide, half an hour earlier, their number had doubled. On the M40 side, anyway. No one in London was getting out.

如今的M25公路是一条嘶吼咆哮的凝塞圆环。在它与通往牛津郡的M40公路交会处，聚集起来的警察数量越来越多。跟半小时前克鲁利通过隔离带时相比，已经多了一倍。至少M40这一侧是这样。谁都别想离开伦敦。

Everybody was cold and wet, and puzzled, and irritable, with the exception of one police officer, who was cold, wet, puzzled, irritable, and exasperated.

所有人都又湿又冷、迷惑不解、焦躁不安。但有个警官不一样，他是又湿又冷、迷惑不解、焦躁不安，并且义愤填膺。

VROOOOSH.

嗡！

One of the senior army technicians interrupted. “It can’t have done. According to our instruments the temperature above the M25 is somewhere in excess of seven hundred degrees centigrade.”

一位军方高级技术员打断他的话。“这不可能。根据我们的设备测量，M25上的温度超过七百摄氏度。”

In addition to the police there were also approximately two hundred others standing around, and inspecting the M25 through binoculars. They included representatives from her Majesty’s Army, the Bomb Disposal Squad, M15, M16, the Special Branch, and the CIA. There was also a man selling hot dogs.

除了警察以外，周围还站着将近两百人，正用望远镜观察M25公路。他们包括皇室军队代表，还有拆弹小队、军情五处、军情六处、政治保安处和美国中央情报局。另外还有个人在卖热狗。

“Look. I don’t care if you believe me or not,” he sighed, “all I’m telling you is what I saw. It was an old car, a Rolls, or a Bentley, one of those flash vintage jobs, and it made it over the bridge.”

“听着，我不在乎你们信不信。”他叹了口气，“我跟你们说的，都是我亲眼所见。它是一辆老车，劳斯莱斯或者宾利。就是那种闪闪发亮的古董车，它开过了立交桥。”

“Or a hundred and forty degrees below,” added his assistant.

“或是零下一百四十摄氏度。”他的助手说。

“… or a hundred and forty degrees below zero,” agreed the senior technician. “There does appear to be some confusion on that score, although I think we can safely attribute it to mechanical error of some kind, [This was true. There wasn’t a thermometer on earth that could have been persuaded to register both 700° C and -140° C at the same time; which was the correct temperature.] but the fact remains that we can’t even get a helicopter directly over the M25 without winding up with Helicopter McNuggets. How on earth can you tell me that a vintage car drove over it unharmed?”

“…或零下一百四十摄氏度。”高级技术员说，“这一点确实有些混乱，但我想完全可以归因于某种机械故障。（的确如此。地球上的温度计都不肯接受同时出现七百摄氏度和零下一百四十摄氏度的情况：现在的确是这个温度。）但事实证明，我们甚至不能让直升机停在M25上空，它们会变成麦乐直升机套餐。你居然告诉我一辆古董车毫发无伤地开了过去？”

“Do you seriously expect any of us to believe…” began somebody.

“你真以为我们会相信…”有个人开口说。

“I didn’t say it drove over it unharmed,” corrected the policeman, who was thinking seriously about leaving the Metropolitan Police and going into business with his brother, who was resigning his job with the Electricity Board, and was going to start breeding chickens. “It burst into flames. It just kept on going.”

“我没说它毫发无伤。”警察更正道。他认真考虑着离开大都会警察局，去跟自己的兄弟一起干。他兄弟刚刚辞去了电力委员会的职务，正准备开个养鸡场。“它全都烧着了，但还在继续前进。”

Over their heads it sailed, forty feet in the air, engulfed in a deep blue nimbus which faded to red at the edges: a little white motor scooter, and riding it, a middle-aged woman in a pink helmet, and holding tightly to her, a short man in a mackintosh and a day-glo green crash helmet (the motor scooter was too far up for anyone to see that his eyes were tightly shut, but they were). The woman was screaming. What she was screaming was this: “Gerrrronnnimooooo!”

在他们头顶四十英尺的地方，有个东西一闪而过，深蓝色光环罩在周围，边缘部分褪成了红色。那是一辆白色小型摩托车，一个戴粉头盔的中年妇女骑在车上，还有个人坐在后面，紧紧抱住她的腰。那是个穿橡皮雨衣的小个儿男人，头戴花里胡哨的绿色头盔。（摩托车太高了，所有人都没看见他双眼紧闭，但事实就是这样）。那女人正在尖叫。她的叫声是这样的：“呃呃呃哦哦啊啊啊啊！”

One of the advantages of the Wasabi, as Newt was always keen to point out, was that when it was badly damaged it was very hard to tell. Newt had to keep driving Dick Turpin onto the shoulder to avoid fallen branches.

正如牛顿急于指出的那样，绿芥末牌汽车的优点之一，在于即便遭受严重损坏，你也很难看出。牛顿被迫把迪克·托平开上路肩，避过落在路上的树枝。

And Vrooosh.

然后是“嗡”的一声。

“You’ve made me drop all the cards on the floor!”

“你害我把所有卡片都掉在地上了！”

The car thumped back onto the road; a small voice from somewhere under the glove compartment said, “Oil plessure arert.”

汽车“砰”的一下开回大路，杂物盒底下传出一个细小的声音：“油鸭警包。”

A high-pitched keening noise, haunting and strange. Like a thousand glass harmonicas being played in unison, all slightly off-key; like the sound of the molecules of the air itself wailing in pain.

一阵尖锐的噪声从后方传来，怪异得让人印象深刻。就像上千架玻璃键琴一同演奏，但都稍稍有些跑调。又像是空气分子在痛苦地哀嚎。

“Well, if Agnes is right, and we’re doing all this because she’s predicted it, then any card picked right now has got to be relevant. That’s logic.”

“哦，如果艾格尼丝说得对，如果咱们所做的一切都被她预言到了，那么你捡起任何卡片，都会与眼下的情势相关。这是逻辑。”

“I’ll never be able to sort them out now,” she moaned.

“我再也没法把它们整理好了。”安娜丝玛呻吟道。

“Listen, I know these kinds of places. They have huge guards made out of teak guarding the gates, Anathema, and they have white helmets and real guns, you understand, which fire real bullets made of real lead which can go right into you and bounce around and come out of the same hole before you can even say ‘Excuse me, we have reason to believe that World War Three is due any moment and they’re going to do the show right here,’ and then they have serious men in suits with bulging jackets who take you into a little room without windows and ask you questions like are you now, or have you ever been, a member of a pinko subversive organization such as any British political party? And –“

“听着，我了解这种地方。他们有柚木疙瘩似的高大警卫看守大门，安娜丝玛，他们有白头盔和真枪，你明白吗，会发射真铅做成的真子弹，能钻进你的身体，在里面弹来弹去，再从同一个洞口钻出来。你都来不及说‘抱歉，我们有理由相信第三次世界大战一触即发，而且就在这里上演’。他们还有穿皱皱巴巴的西服、一脸严肃的男人，会把你领进一个没有窗户的小房间，问你各种问题。比方说你是否加入了，或者曾经加入过左倾颠覆主义组织，例如任何英国政党，而且…”

“You don’t have to,” said Newt manically, “Just pick one. Any one. It won’t matter.”

“用不着。”牛顿狂躁地说，“捡一张。随便哪张都行。无所谓。”

“It’s nonsense.”

“这是胡扯。”

“What do you mean?”

“此话怎讲？”

“Yeah? Look, you’re even here because she predicted it. And have you thought what we’re going to say to the colonel? If we get to see him, which of course we won’t.”

“哦？听着，你在这儿是因为她预言到了。你想过要怎么跟上校说吗？如果咱们真要去见他的话。当然咱们肯定不会这么做。”

“If we’re reasonable –“

“如果咱们讲道理…”

“We’re nearly there.”

“咱们就快到了。”

“I think you’re getting rather overexcited,” said Anathema quietly, picking the last of the file cards up from the floor of the car.

“我想你激动过头了。”安娜丝玛轻声说道。她从轿车地板上捡起最后一摞卡片。

“Overexcited? No! I’m getting very calmly worried that someone might shoot me!”

“激动过头？不！我很冷静地担心着可能被人射杀的问题！”

“I’m sure Agnes would have mentioned it if we were going to be shot. She’s very good at that sort of thing.” She began absentmindedly to shuffle the file cards.

“如果咱们会被射杀，我敢说艾格尼丝肯定会提到的。她很擅长这方面的预言。”安娜丝玛漫不经心地翻找着卡片。

“You know,” she said, carefully cutting the cards and riffling the two piles together, “I read somewhere that there’s a sect that believes that computers are the tools of the Devil. They say that Armageddon will come about because of the Antichrist being good with computers. Apparently it’s mentioned somewhere in Revelations. I think I must have read about it in a newspaper recently…”

“你知道。”她一边说，一边把卡片捋齐，将两沓洗在一起，“我在什么地方读到过，有个教派相信电脑是恶魔的工具。他们说末日之战的发生，就是因为敌基督特别精通电脑。显然《启示录》的某个章节提到过这个问题。我想我肯定是在最近的报纸上看到的…”

“Look, it’s got gates and wire fences and everything! And probably the kind of dogs that eat people!”

“你看，它有大门和铁丝网，什么都有！可能还有那种吃人的狗！”

“Daily Mail.’Letter From America.’ Um, August the third,” said Newt. “Just after the story about the woman in Worms, Nebraska, who taught her duck to play the accordion.”

“《每日邮报》，‘美国来函’栏目，呃，8月3日。”牛顿说，“它前面的报道讲的是内布拉斯加州沃姆斯市，有个女人教她的鸭子演奏手风琴。”

“Is that why it appears to be paved with rubber?”

“所以它看起来就像是用胶皮铺成的？”

The car jerked to a halt.

车子猛然停住。

3001. Behinde the Eagle’s Neste a grate Ash hath fallen.

3001。在鹰巢之后，倒下一株高大树。

“Mm,” said Anathema, spreading the cards face down on her lap.

“嗯。”安娜丝玛把卡片面朝上摊在腿上。

The air base looked battered. Several large trees had fallen down near the entrance, and some men with a digger were trying to shift them. The guard on duty was watching them disinterestedly, but he half turned and looked coldly at the car.

空军基地看起来破败不堪。有几棵大树倒在入口处，几个人开着一辆挖掘机正试图把它们移走，当班的卫兵漠不关心地看着他们。卫兵听到刹车声，半转过身来冷眼望向这边。

“Yes. We always thought it was something to do with the Russian Revolution. Keep going along this road and turn left.”

“对。我们一直以为它讲的是俄国革命。沿这条路往前开，然后左转。”

The turning led to a narrow lane, with the base’s perimeter fence on the left-hand side.

他们拐进一条狭窄小路，基地围墙就在左手边。

So computers are tools of the Devil? thought Newt. He had no problem believing it. Computers had to be the tools of somebody, and all he knew for certain was that it definitely wasn’t him.

电脑是恶魔的工具？牛顿心想。他乐于相信这个说法。电脑肯定是某些人的工具，牛顿只知道某些人中绝对不包括自己。

“And now pull in here. There’s often cars here, and no one takes any notice,” said Anathema.

“停在这儿。这儿总有很多车，谁也不会注意。”安娜丝玛说。

“What is this place?”

“这是什么地方？”

“All right,” said Newt. “Pick a card.”

“好了。”牛顿说，“拿张卡。”

“It’s the local Lovers’ Lane.”

“这是本地的情人小径。”

“Is that all?”

“就这些？”

“That’s good enough for me. What do you suggest we do, then?”

“对我来说就够了。咱们接下来怎么办？”

“Well, Agnes must have known something. So I suppose we just wait. It’s not too bad now the wind’s gone down.”

“艾格尼丝肯定知道点什么。所以我估计咱们就在这儿等着。现在风停了，天气还不算太糟。”

“You know him?” said Newt, with forced nonchalance.

“你认识他？”牛顿强装冷淡地说。

“Hi, George. Terrible storm, wasn’t it.”

“嗨，乔治。可怕的风暴，不是吗？”

“Sure was.”

“说得没错。”

They walked on. He watched them out of sight.

他们继续往前走。乔治目送他们离开。

“Would he shoot us if we just walked in?” said Newt.

“咱们要是直接走进去，他会开枪吗？”牛顿说。

They walked along the hedge — shaded lane for a hundred yards until they reached the ash tree. Agnes had been right. It was quite grate. It had fallen right across the fence.

他们沿着树篱掩映下的小径走了一百多码，来到梣树前。艾格尼丝说得对，它很大，就倒在围墙上。

A guard was sitting on it, smoking a cigarette. He was black. Newt always felt guilty in the presence of black Americans, in case they blamed him for two hundred years of slave trading.

有个卫兵坐在树上抽着烟。他是黑人。牛顿每次看见美国黑人，都会觉得内疚，生怕他们为那两百多年的奴隶贸易责骂自己。

“Oh, sure. Sometimes a few of them come down to the pub. Pleasant enough in a well-scrubbed way.”

“哦，当然。他们有几个人偶尔会到酒吧来。干干净净的，挺招人喜欢。”

The man stood up when they approached, and then sagged into an easier stance.

他们走过去时，那人站起身，接着又放松下来，随随便便地站在那儿。

“He might well point a gun at us in a menacing way,” Anathema

“他可能会用枪指着咱们，作出威胁姿态。”安娜丝玛说。

“Oh.” Newt looked at the clouds piling up on the horizon. “Good old Agnes,” he said.

“哦。”牛顿看着地平线上积聚的云层，“老好人艾格尼丝。”他说。

“Oh, hi, Anathema,” he said.

“哦，嗨，安娜丝玛。”他说。

“I reckon we can cut along Drovers Lane and then up through Roundhead Woods,” said Pepper.

“我想咱们可以从畜牧商人小径插过去，然后进入圆颅党森林。”佩帕说。

There was a clacking noise and Pepper swung out of her drive. You could always tell Pepper’s bike. She thought it was improved by a piece of cardboard cunningly held against the wheel by a clothes peg. Cats had learned to take evasive action when she was two streets away.

噼里啪啦一阵响动，佩帕从她家车道骑了出来。她的自行车很容易辨识。佩帕认为用衣夹把一片纸板巧妙地固定在车轮上有助于提高车子性能。镇上的猫咪早都长了记性，离她两条街远就要采取规避动作。

Adam pedalled steadily along the road, Dog running along behind and occasionally trying to bite his back tire out of sheer excitement.

亚当蹬着自行车，沿大路匀速前进。狗狗追在后面，出于兴奋时不时张嘴去咬后轮。

Brian and Wensleydale pulled in behind them. Wensleydale’s bicycle was black, and shiny, and sensible. Brian’s might have been white, once, but its color was lost beneath a thick layer of mud.

布赖恩和温斯利戴从后面赶了上来。温斯利戴的黑色自行车闪闪发亮，感觉有模有样。布赖恩的车可能曾是白色的，但所有颜色都被一层厚厚的泥巴盖住了。

“‘S all muddy,” said Adam.

“都是泥。”亚当说。

“It’s stupid calling it a milit’ry base,” said Pepper. “I went up there when they had that open day and they had no guns or missiles or anythin’. Just knobs and dials and brass bands playin’.”

“管那地方叫军事基地，就很傻。”佩帕说，“我在他们的开放参观日进去看过，根本没枪啊、导弹什么的。只有按钮、刻度盘和军乐队。”

“That’s right,” said Pepper nervously. “It gets all muddy up there. We ort to go along by the chalk pit. ‘S always dry because of the chalk. An’ then up by the sewage farm.”

“没错。”佩帕紧张地说，“那块全都是泥巴。咱们应该沿着白垩矿坑走，因为有白垩，那里总是干的。然后从污水处理厂过。”

“Not much milit’ry about knobs and dials,” said Pepper.

“按钮和刻度盘可不怎么像军事基地。”佩帕说。

“Yes,” said Adam.

“对。”亚当说。

“I got a kit for Christmas,” Wensleydale volunteered. “All electric bits. There were a few knobs and dials in it. You could make a radio or a thing that goes beep.”

“我在圣诞节得到一套工具。”温斯利戴主动说，“全是电子元件。里面也有些按钮和刻度盘。你可以做个收音机，或者会哔哔响的东西。”

“I dunno, reely,” said Adam. “It’s amazin’ what you can do with knobs and dials.”

“我不知道，真的。”亚当说，“用按钮和刻度盘能干出来的事儿，可以吓你一跳。”

“Cor,” said Brian. “That’s be wicked.”

“靠。”布赖恩说，“酷毙了。”

“I dunno,” said Adam thoughtfully, “I’m thinkin’ more of certain people patching into the worldwide milit’ry communications network and telling all the computers and stuff to start fightin’.”

“我不知道。”亚当若有所思地说，“我在想的是，也许会有某个人侵入世界军事通信网络，告诉所有电脑之类的东西开始打仗。”

“Sort of,” said Adam.

“有点。”亚当说。

R. P. Tyler, short, well-fed, satisfied, stomped down a country lane, accompanied by his wife’s miniature poodle, Shutzi. R. P. Tyler knew the difference between right and wrong; there were no moral grays of any kind in his life. He was not, however, satisfied simply with being vouchsafed the difference between right and wrong. He felt it his bounden duty to tell the world.

又矮又胖的R.P。泰勒先生，正心满意足地大步走在乡间小径上，身边跟着他妻子那条玩具贵宾犬莎茨。R.P。泰勒惯能明辨是非，在他的生活中不存在道德上的灰色地带。但他并不满足得到明辨善恶的天赐，还认为自己有责任告诉全世界。

It is a high and lonely destiny to be Chairman of the Lower Tadfield Residents’ Association.

成为下塔德菲尔德居民委员会主席，是一条孤高之路。

Sirs,

先生们：

Since his retirement last year the letters had increased to the point where not even the Tadfield Advertiser was able to print all of them. Indeed, the letter R. P. Tyler had completed before setting out on his evening walk had begun:

自从他去年退休后，信件数量与日俱增，就连《广告报》都无法全部刊登出来。实际上，R.P。泰勒今晚出来散步前刚写好的信件，是这样开头的：

Not for R. P. Tyler the soapbox, the polemic. verse, the broadsheet. R. P. Tyler’s chosen forum was the letter column of the Tadfield Advertiser. If a neighbor’s tree was inconsiderate enough to shed leaves into R. P. Tyler’s garden, R. P. Tyler would first carefully sweep them all up, place them in boxes, and leave the boxes outside his neighbor’s front door, with a stern note. Then he would write a letter to the Tadfield Advertiser. If he sighted teenagers sitting on the village green, their portable cassette players playing, and they were enjoying themselves, he would take it upon himself to point out to them the error of their ways. And after he had fled their jeering, he would write to the Tadfield Advertiser on the Decline of Morality and the Youth of Today.

临时讲演台、论辩诗歌和大幅海报都不合他的胃口。R.P。泰勒选定的论坛是《塔德菲尔德广告报》的读者来信专栏。如果邻居家的树不管不顾地把叶子落在R.P。泰勒的花园里，他首先会认真仔细地把它们扫起来，放进盒子，然后将盒子搁在邻居家门外，再附上一张措辞严厉的便条。接着他会给《塔德菲尔德广告报》写封信。如果他看见年轻人坐在小镇绿地上，听着随身听自得其乐，就会认为自己有责任指出他们行事不当的地方。在被一通嘲讽赶走之后，泰勒先生会以“道德的沉沦”或“今天的年轻人”为题给《塔德菲尔德广告报》写信。

I note with distress that the newspapers of today no longer feel obligated to their public, we, the people who pay your wages…

我失望地注意到，如今的报纸已经不认为自己对公众负有责任。是我们——普普通通的英国人，支付了你们的薪水…

He surveyed the fallen branches that littered the narrow country road. I don’t suppose, he pondered, they think of the cleaning up bill when they send us these storms. Parish Council has to foot the bill to clean it all up. And we, the taxpayers, pay their wages…

他查看着胡乱掉在乡村小路上的断枝落叶。我不认为，他思忖道，他们把暴风雨弄过来时，考虑到了清扫工作的费用。教区行政委员会必须负担起这些账单。是我们，纳税人们，支付了他们的工资…

R. P. Tyler looked away, embarrassed. It might be that the sole purpose of his evening constitutional was to allow the dog to relieve itself, but he was dashed if he’d admit that to himself. He stared up at the storm clouds. They were banked up high, in towering piles of smudged gray and black. It wasn’t just the flickering tongues of lightning that forked through them like the opening sequence of a Frankenstein movie; it was the way they stopped when they reached the borders of Lower Tadfield. And in their center was a circular patch of daylight; but the light had a stretched, yellow quality to it, like a forced smile.

R.P。泰勒尴尬地把头扭开。他晚上出来散步健身的唯一目的，可能就是为了让小狗撒尿。但如果承认这一点，会让他赶到困窘不安。泰勒盯着头顶的暴雨云。它们堆得很高，形成灰黑色的厚重云层。闪电吐出分叉的光舌，就像《科学怪人》之类的恐怖片开场时的样子。更诡异的是，它们一到下塔德菲尔德的边界就会戛然而止。云层中露出一片圆形日光，但那光线有种绷紧发黄的感觉，仿佛在强颜欢笑。

The they in this thought were the weather forecasters on Radio Four, whom R. P. Tyler blamed for the weather. [He did not have a television. Or as his wife put it, “Ronald wouldn’t have one of those things in the house, would you Ronald?” and he always agreed, although secretly he would have liked to have seen some of the smut and filth and violence that the National Viewers and Listeners Association complained of. Not because he wanted to see it, of course. Just because he wanted to know what other people should be protected from.]

这里的“他们”指的是BBC第四广播电台的天气预报员。R.P。泰勒把所有天气问题都怪在他们头上。（他没有电视。正如他妻子常说的那样：“罗纳德不会允许家里有那种东西的，对吧，罗纳德？”而他总是表示赞同。但私下里，泰勒其实很想看看“英国观众及听众协会”经常抱怨的暴力、猥亵和淫秽内容。当然了，不是因为他想看，他只是想知道应该保护其他人远离什么危险。）

Shutzi stopped by a roadside beech tree to cock its leg.

莎茨停在路边的一棵山毛榉下，跷起后腿。

There was a low roaring.

忽然传来一阵低沉的轰鸣。

“Vandals!” called R. P. Tyler after them.

“野蛮人！”R.P。泰勒冲骑手们的背影喊道。

Down the narrow lane came four motorbikes. They shot past him, and turned the corner, disturbing a cock pheasant who whirred across the lane in a nervous arc of russet and green.

四辆摩托车沿小路驶来。它们从泰勒先生身边一闪而过，拐过弯去，惊到一只公雉鸡。它扑棱棱飞过小路，在空中画出一道黄绿色弧线。

He jerked Shutzi’s lead, and they marched along the road.

泰勒一拉莎茨的狗绳，沿小路向前进发。

It was so quiet.

周围如此安静。

He was about to advance on them sternly, when it came to him that he was outnumbered, four to one, and that they were taller than he was, and that they were undoubtedly violent psychopaths. No one but a violent psychopath rode motorbikes in R. P. Tyler’s world.

他正要怒气冲冲地走上前去，却发现对方人数占优：四对一，个头也比他高，而且无疑是有暴力倾向的精神病患者。在R.P。泰勒的世界中，只有有暴力倾向的精神病患者才骑摩托。

The countryside wasn’t made for people like them. It was made for people like him.

乡村并不适合他们这种人。这里最适合他这样的人。

R. P. Tyler observed the situation, and leaped effortlessly to a conclusion. These vandals — he had, of course been right — had come to the countryside in order to desecrate the War Memorial and to overturn signposts.

R.P。泰勒观察了一下局势，不费吹灰之力就得出结论。这些野蛮人——他当然不会说错——到乡村来，是为了亵渎战争纪念碑，顺手毁坏沿途的路标。

Five minutes later he turned the corner, to find three of the motorcyclists standing around a fallen signpost, a victim of the storm. The fourth, a tall man with a mirrored visor, remained on his bike.

五分钟后，他拐过弯，发现有三个摩托车手正站在被暴风吹倒的路标旁。第四个人身量很高，头戴镜面头盔，还骑在车上。

So he raised his chin and began to strut past them, without apparently noticing they were there, [Although as a member (read, founder) of his local Neighborhood Watch scheme he did attempt to memorize the motorbikes’ number plates.] all the while composing in his head a letter (Sirs, this evening I noted with distress a large number of hooligans on motorbicycles infesting Our Fair Village. Why, oh Why, does the government do nothing about this plague of…)

所以他抬起下巴，昂首阔步地从他们身边走过，就好像这些人根本不存在。（但作为本地邻里安全互助会的成员——应该说是发起人，他试图记下这些摩托车的车牌号码。）与此同时，他在脑袋里构思着一封信。（先生们，今晚我失望地注意到，一大群小流氓骑着摩托车侵扰我们宁静的村庄。为什么，哦，为什么有关当局对这些问题袖手旁观…）

“The signpost musta blew down,” said the motorcyclist.

“这块路标牌肯定是被风吹倒了。”摩托车手说。

“Hi,” said one of the motorcyclists, raising his visor to reveal a thin face and a trim black beard. “We’re kinda lost.”

“嗨。”一个摩托车手喊道，他抬起面罩露出瘦削面庞和整齐的黑胡子，“我们似乎迷路了。”

“Ah,” said R. P. Taylor disapprovingly.

“哦。”R.P。泰勒不以为然地说。

“Yes, I suppose it must,” agreed R. P. Taylor. He noticed with surprise that he was getting hungry.

“对，我想也是。”R.P。泰勒表示同意。他惊奇地发现自己觉得肚子饿了。

“Yeah. Well, we’re heading for Lower Tadfield.”

“嗯。你看，我们要去下塔德菲尔德。”

An officious eyebrow raised. “You’re Americans. With the air force base, I suppose.” (Sirs, when I did national service I was a credit to my country. I notice with horror and dismay that airmen from the Tadfield Air Base are driving around our noble countryside dressed no better than common thugs. While I appreciate their importance in defending the freedom of the western world…).

一条多管闲事的眉毛扬了起来。“你们是美国人。我猜是在空军基地工作吧。”（先生们，当我服兵役时，心里想的都是要为国争光。我沮丧而惊恐地注意到，塔德菲尔德空军基地的飞行员们，在我们高贵的乡间超速行驶，穿着打扮不比本地无赖强多少。虽然我感激他们为保卫西方世界自由民主方面做出的贡献…）

Then his love of giving instructions took over. “You go back down that road for half a mile, then first left, it’s in a deplorable state of disrepair I’m afraid, I’ve written numerous letters to the council about it, are you civil servants or civil master. that’s what I asked them, after all, who pays your wages? then second right, only it’s not exactly right, it’s on the left but you’ll find it bends round toward the right eventually, it’s signposted Porrit’s Lane, but of course it isn’t Pornt’s Lane, you look at the ordinance survey map, you’ll see, it’s simply the eastern end of Forest Hill Lane, you’ll come out in the village, now you go past the Bull and Fiddle — that’s a public house — then when you get to the church (I have pointed out to the people who compile the ordinance survey map that it’s a church with a spire, not a church with a tower, indeed I have written to the Tadfield Advertiser, suggesting they mount a local campaign to get the map corrected, and I have every hope that once these people realize with whom they are dealing you’ll see a hasty U-turn from them) then you’ll get to a crossroads, now, you go straight across that crossroads and you’ll immediately come to a second crossroads, now, you can take either the left-hand fork or go straight on, either way you’ll arrive at the air base (although the left-hand fork is almost a tenth of a mile shorter) and you can’t miss it.”

接着，他好为人师的天性占了上风。“你们沿这条路开一公里，然后左转。那里年久失修，路况恐怕相当糟糕。我给村镇委员会写了好几封信，责问他们到底是人民公仆还是人民的主人。我就是这么说的，毕竟是谁支付你们的薪水。接着往右转，只不过它并不是右，刚开始是向左，但你会发现它最终拐向右侧。那里的路标写着坡瑞特小路，当然其实它不是坡瑞特小路，你如果看一眼官方测绘地图，就会发现那里只是山林小路东端。你们会进入小镇，然后经过‘公牛和小提琴’——这是一所酒馆，就可以来到教堂。我早就跟绘制官方测绘地图的人说了，那是一座带尖顶的教堂，不是带尖塔。而且我也给《塔德菲尔德广告报》写过信，建议他们发起一场公众运动，迫使有关方面把地图改过来。我完全相信，只要那些人意识到自己在跟谁打交道，态度上就会有个一百八十度大转弯。然后你们就会来到十字路口，直接往前开，很快就会看到第二个十字路口。在那里，你们可以走左边的岔道，或者直行，这两条路都到空军基地——不过左边的岔道要近差不多两百米。你们不会错过那地方的。”

Shutzi gave a little yelp and darted behind R. P. Tyler, where it remained, shivering.

莎茨轻轻叫了一声，随即蹿到R.P。泰勒身后，躲在那里瑟瑟发抖。

The strangers climbed back onto their bikes. The one in white (a hippie, by the look of him, thought R. P. Tyler) dropped an empty crisp packet onto the grass shoulder.

这些陌生人重新骑上摩托车。那个穿白衣服的（模样一看就是个嬉皮士，R.P。泰勒心想）把空薯片袋扔在路肩的草地上。

R. P. Tyler drew himself up to his full height. [Five foot six] “Young man,” he said, “how would you feel if I came over to your house and dropped litter everywhere?”

R.P。泰勒挺直一米六八的身板。“年轻人，”他说，“要是我到你家去，把垃圾扔得遍地都是，你会怎么想？”

Famine stared at him blankly. “I, uh, I’m not sure I got that…” he began.

饥荒茫然地看着他。“我，呃，我似乎没太听明白…”他开口说。

“Oh, it’s not just mine,” said the boy. “It’s everybody’s.”

“哦，不只是我一个人的。”男孩说，“它属于每一个人。”

Pollution smiled, wistfully. “Very, very pleased,” he breathed. “Oh, that would be wonderful.”

污染露出心驰神往的微笑。“非常非常荣幸。”他说，“哦，那真是太美妙了。”

I DID. LET US GO.

我知道了。走吧。

Engines revved.

四部引擎开始转动。

R. P. Tyler stared after them, until his attention was distracted by the sound of something going clackclackclack He turned. Four figures on bicycles shot past him, closely followed by the scampering figure of a small dog.

R.P。泰勒注视着他们的背影，接着一阵咔嗒咔嗒的声音吸引了他的注意力。泰勒转回头。四个骑自行车的人影从他身边经过，后面紧跟着一条撒欢的小狗。

“I missed something,” said War. “Now, why are we meant to make a U-turn by the church?”

“我有点糊涂。”战争说，“咱们干吗要在教堂那里一百八十度转弯？”

“Excuse me,” barked Tyler. “Is that your crisp packet?”

“抱歉。”泰勒咆哮道，“这是你的薯片袋吗？”

Beneath his bike an oil slick puddled a rainbow on the wet road.

在他的摩托车下，一摊机油落到潮湿的道路上，反射出五颜六色的光芒。

JUST FOLLOW ME, said the tall one in front, and the four rode off together.

跟着我就行，最前面的大高个儿说。四个人一同出发了。

The Them braked to a halt and looked at him.

“他们”停下车，看着他。

“You! Stop!” shouted R. P. Tyler.

“你们！停下！”R.P。泰勒喊道。

“Master Young,” ordered R. P. Tyler, “please get your — your mutt away from my Shutzi.” Tyler did not trust Dog. When he had first met the dog, three days ago, it had snarled at him, and glowed its eyes red. This had impelled Tyler to begin a letter pointing out that Dog was undoubtedly rabid, certainly a danger to the community, and should be put down for the General Good, until his wife had reminded him that glowing red eyes weren’t a symptom of rabies, or, for that matter, anything seen outside of the kind of film that neither of the Tylers would be caught dead at but knew all they needed to know about, thank you very much.

“扬先生，”R.P。泰勒呵斥道，“请让你的…你的野狗离莎茨远点。”泰勒很讨厌狗狗。他们三天前第一次相遇时，狗狗就冲他狂吠，而是眼睛还闪着红光。这让泰勒开始撰写一封信函，指出狗狗无疑患有狂犬病，对整个社区都存在威胁，应该出于大众利益将它处决。但妻子后来提醒他说，放红光的眼睛不是狂犬病的症状。而且话说回来，只有在泰勒夫妇都没看过，但又对关键内容完全了解的电影里，才会出现这种场面。万分感谢。

“I knew it was you, Adam Young, and your little, hmph, cabal. What, might I enquire, are you children doing out at this time of night? Do your fathers know you’re out?”

“我就知道是你，亚当·扬。还有你这个，嗯，小集团。我可否询问一句，你们这些孩子大晚上跑出来干什么？你们的父亲知道你们出门了吗？”

The leader of the cyclist turned. “I can’t see how you can say it’s late,” he said, “seems to me, seems to me, that if the sun’s still out then it’s not late.”

领头的骑车人转过身来。“我不知道你为什么说现在是大晚上。”他说，“在我看来，在我看来，只要还有太阳，就不算晚。”

There was a commotion on the grass. Shutzi, who was a particularly refined toy French poodle, of the kind only possessed by people who were never able to fit children into their household budgets, was being menaced by Dog.

草坪上一阵骚动。莎茨是一条特别高贵的法国玩具贵宾犬，只有那些永远无法把养育孩子的开销整合进家庭预算的人，才会养这种狗。它现在正受到狗狗的威胁。

“It’s past your bedtime, anyway,” R. P. Tyler informed them, “and don’t stick out your tongue at me, young lady,” this was to Pepper, “or I will be writing a letter to your mother informing her of the lamentable and unladylike state of her offspring’s manners.”

“反正已经超过你们的睡觉时间了。”R.P。泰勒对他们说，“别想冲我伸舌头，小姑娘。”这话是对佩帕说的，“要不然我就给你妈妈写封信，说她的后代一点礼貌也不懂，完全没有淑女的样子。”

“Well ‘scuse us,” said Adam, aggrieved. “Pepper was just looking at you. I didn’t know there was any for against looking.”

“好吧，请原谅。”亚当委屈地说，“佩帕只是看着你而已。我不知道看着别人有什么错。”

“Dog,” said Adam, ominously. His dog slunk back to his master’s bicycle.

“狗狗。”亚当沉声说道。他的狗耷拉着尾巴，一溜小跑回到主人的自行车旁。

Dog ignored him. He’d got a lot of dog catching-up still to do.

狗狗没理他。他还没享受够追逐的乐趣呢。

“You cheeky little monkey,” said R. P. Tyler. “When I see your father, Adam Young, I will inform him in no uncertain terms that…”

“你这厚颜无耻的小猴子。”R.P。泰勒说，“等我见到你父亲，亚当·扬，我会直言不讳地告诉他…”

Adam looked astounded. “Dog’s not a mutt. Dog’s a remarkable dog. He’s clever. Dog, you get off Mr. Tyler’s horrible of poodle.”

亚当似乎吃了一惊。“狗狗不是野狗。狗狗是条不同寻常的狗。他很聪明。狗狗，别再追泰勒先生那条讨厌的贵妇犬了。”

“If that’s all right with you,” said Adam, with what he hoped was bitter and scathing sarcasm. “I mean, we won’t want to go there if it wasn’t all right with you.”

“如果您觉得没问题的话。”亚当希望这句话能体现出尖刻的挖苦，“我是说，如果您觉得有任何问题，我们就不会去了。”

“To the air base,” said Brian.

“去空军基地。”布赖恩说。

But the Them were already pedalling off down the road, in the direction of Lower Tadfield Air Base — travelling by the Them’s route, which was shorter and simpler and more scenic than the route suggested by Mr. Tyler.

但“他们”已经骑上车，朝下塔德菲尔德空军基地进发了。他们选择的路线要比泰勒先生推荐的路线更短、更便捷，风景也更好。

“I don’t believe you have answered my question. Where are you four off to?”

“我想你们还没回答我的问题。你们四个要去哪儿？”

R. P. Tyler had composed a lengthy mental letter on the failings of the youth of today. It covered falling educational standards, the lack of respect given to their elders and betters, the way they always seemed to slouch these days instead of walking with a proper upright bearing, juvenile delinquency, the return of compulsory National Service, birching, flogging, and dog licenses.

R.P。泰勒在心中构思出一封长信，主题当然是如今年轻人的堕落。它涉及教育水准的下降，对长辈和上流人士缺乏尊重，他们不会挺起腰杆走路，总是懒洋洋地溜达，还有青少年犯罪，强迫兵役制的回归，桦树条惩戒，鞭刑，以及养狗许可证。

“Excuse me, love,” said a warm female voice. “I think we’re lost.”

“抱歉，亲爱的。”一个和蔼的女声说道，“我想我们迷路了。”

Putputput putputput

噗噗噗噗噗噗。噗噗噗噗噗噗。

He was very satisfied with it. He had a sneaking suspicion that it would be too good for the Tadfield Advertiser, and had decided to send it to the Times.

这封信让他相当满意。泰勒心底隐约有些疑虑，这封信对《塔德菲尔德广告报》来说似乎质量太高了。他最终决定把信寄给《泰晤士报》。

It was an aging motor scooter, and it was being ridden by a middleaged woman. Clutching her tightly, his eyes screwed shut, was a raincoated little man with a bright green crash helmet on. Sticking up between them was what appeared to be an antique gun with a funnelshaped muzzle.

这是一辆古旧的小型摩托车，上面骑着位中年妇女。一个穿雨衣的小个子使劲抱着她，双眼紧闭，头戴浅绿色头盔。在两人之间插着个东西，似乎是带漏斗形枪膛的古董枪。

“Lower Tadfield. I’m not sure of the exact address, but we’re looking for someone,” said the woman, then, in a totally different voice she said, “His name is Adam Young.”

“下塔德菲尔德。我不知道准确地址，但我们是想找个人。”女人忽然换上一种迥然不同的声音说，“他叫亚当·扬。”

“Oh. Where are you going?”

“哦。你们要去哪儿？”

R. P. Tyler boggled. “You want that boy?” he asked. “What’s he done now — no, no, don’t tell me. I don’t want to know.”

R.P。泰勒有点犹豫。“你们要找那个男孩？”他问，“他干了什…不、不，别告诉我。我不想知道。”

“Boy?” said the woman. “You didn’t tell me he was a boy. How old is he?” Then she said, “He’s eleven. Well, I do wish you’d mentioned this before. It puts a completely different complexion on things.”

“男孩？”女人说，“你没告诉我是个男孩。他多大年纪？”她又接着说，“十一岁。哦，我真希望你早点说清。这下子情况就完全不同了。”

R. P. Tyler just stared. Then he realized what was going on. The woman was a ventriloquist. What he had taken for a man in a green crash helmet, he now saw was a ventriloquist’s dummy. He wondered how he could ever have assumed it was human. He felt the whole thing was in vaguely bad taste.

R.P。泰勒愣愣地盯着她，随即明白了到底是怎么回事。这女人是个口技演员。他刚才以为后面那东西是戴绿头盔的男人，但其实是口技假人。真奇怪，自己怎么会认为那是个人？他觉得这东西从上到下都隐约有种粗俗感。

“I saw Adam Young not five minutes ago,” he told the woman. “He and his little cronies were on their way to the American air base.”

“我五分钟前刚见到亚当·扬。”他对女人说，“他和那个小集团正要去美国空军基地。”

“Only on Thursdays,” said Madame Tracy, disapprovingly. “And I charge extra. And I wonder if you could direct us to –“

“只在星期四。”特蕾西夫人不以为然地说，“而且我会额外收费。另外不知您能否给我们指一下…”

“Oh dear,” said the woman, paling slightly. “I’ve never really liked the Yanks. They’re really very nice people, you know. Yes, but you can’t trust people who pick up the ball all the time when they play football.”

“哦，天哪。”女人脸色有些发白，“我一直不喜欢那些美国佬。他们其实都是好人，你知道。对，但你怎么能信任那些玩足球时老把球抱起来的人呢？”

“Ahh, excuse me,” said R. P. Tyler, “I think it’s very good. Very impressive. I’m deputy chairman of the local Rotary club, and I was wondering, do you do private functions?”

“啊，抱歉。”R.P。泰勒说，“我觉得您说得太对了，让人印象深刻。我是本地扶轮社副主席，我在想，您能否提供个人服务？”

And the little scooter went putputputputputput down the narrow country lane.

小摩托车“噗噗噗噗”地沿着乡间小径开去。

Mr. Tyler had been here before. He wordlessly extended a finger.

泰勒先生遇到过这种情况。他无言地伸出一根手指。

His knowledge of country lore was a little hazy, but he felt fairly sure that if the cows lay down, it meant rain. If they were standing it would probably be fine. These cows were taking it in turns to execute slow and solemn somersaults; and Tyler wondered what it presaged for the weather.

泰勒先生掌握的乡野常识有点含混不清，但他可以肯定如果母牛趴在地上，就意味着要下雨。如果它们站着，则表示天气没问题。这里的母牛正缓慢庄严地轮流翻着跟头，泰勒不知道这预示着什么天气。

R. P. Tyler was offended, but also disappointed. He’d hoped it would be more lifelike.

R.P。泰勒很是气愤，但也有些失望。他本以为这东西会更加逼真。

As it did so, the gray dummy in the green helmet turned around and opened one eye. “Ye great southern pillock,” it croaked.

它离开时，那个戴绿头盔的灰白假人睁开一只眼睛。“侬这该死的南蛮子。”它嘶哑地说。

He sniffed. Something was burning — there was an unpleasant smell of scorched metal and rubber and leather.

他抽抽鼻子。有什么东西烧着了，空中弥漫着一股难闻的气味，似乎是金属、橡胶和皮革被烤焦了。

R. P. Tyler, only ten minutes away from the village, paused, while Shutzi attempted another of its wide range of eliminatory functions. He gazed over the fence.

R.P。泰勒距离小镇只有十分钟的路程，他停下脚步，让莎茨再次行使范围很广的排泄职责。他将目光投向篱笆对面的牧场。

“Excuse me,” said a voice from behind him. R. P. Tyler turned around.

“打扰一下。”一个声音从他身后传来。R.P。泰勒转回身去。

There was a large once-black car on fire in the lane and a man in sunglasses was leaning out of one window, saying through the smoke, “I’m sorry, I’ve managed to get a little lost. Can you direct me to Lower Tadfield Air Base? I know it’s around here somewhere.”

小路上停着一辆曾经是黑色的大轿车，完全包裹在烈焰之中。有个戴墨镜的男人把头探出车窗，透过浓烟说：“抱歉，我似乎有点找不到路了。你能告诉我下塔德菲尔德空军基地怎么走吗？我知道它就在这附近。”

“Yes?”

“嗯？”

“That’s terrific. Much obliged,” said Crowley, as he began to wind up the window.

“真是太好了。感激不尽。”克鲁利说着开始把车窗摇上去。

Should he ask the man if he wanted him to phone the A. A.?

要不要问问他，是否需要自己给汽车协会打个电话？

No. Tyler just couldn’t bring himself to say it. I mean, the man had to know that, didn’t he? He was sitting in the middle of it. Possibly it was some kind of practical joke.

不。泰勒就是没法让自己说出这句话。这人肯定知道，不是吗？他就坐在车里。这可能是某种恶作剧。

R. P. Tyler had to say something.

R.P。泰勒必须得说点什么。

Instead he explained the route carefully, trying not to stare.

但泰勒先生只是仔细解说路线，努力不盯着车看。

The wind blew towards Tyler, across the car, and he felt his eyebrows frizzle.

一阵风透过轿车吹向泰勒，他觉得睫毛都要被烧糊了。

Your car is on fire.

你的车着火了。

Excuse me, young man, but your car is on fire and you’re sitting in it without burning and incidentally it’s red hot in place

抱歉，年轻人，但你的车着火了，碰巧它已经红热发烫，而你坐在里面一点事儿没有。

The stranger smiled, “That must be it,” he said. The orange flames flickering below him gave him an almost infernal appearance.

陌生人露出微笑。“肯定是这么回事。”他说。橙色火舌在他身下跃动，让他看起来仿佛是个恶魔。

No.

不。

“Excuse me, young man,” he said.

“抱歉，年轻人。”他说。

So instead he said, “I think you must have taken a wrong turn about a mile back. A signpost has blown down.”

所以他说：“我想你在一英里前拐错了弯。那里有个路牌被吹倒了。”

“I mean, it’s not the kind of thing you don’t notice, your car being on fire.

我不是说你没注意到，但你的车着火了。

A tongue of flame licked across the charred dashboard.

一条火舌舔过焦黑的仪表盘。

“That’s probably because your car is on fire,” said R. P. Tyler sharply. He jerked Shutzi’s lead, dragged the little dog to heel.

“可能是因为你的车着火了。”R.P。泰勒刻薄地说。他猛地一拉狗绳，把小狗拽到脚边。

Mr. Young was in his front garden, sitting on his deck chair, smoking his pipe.

扬先生正坐在前院的折叠椅上抽烟斗。

This had more to do with Deirdre’s recent discovery of the menace of passive smoking and banning of smoking in the house than he would care to admit to his neighbors. It did not improve his temper. Neither did being addressed as Young by Mr. Tyler.

这主要是因为迪尔德丽最近发现了被动吸烟的危害，禁止他在屋子里抽烟。这种事扬先生是不会跟邻居们承认的。当然，这很难让他保持良好心情。被泰勒先生直呼其名也一样。

“Is it?” said Crowley. “I honestly hadn’t noticed.” And he reversed back down the country lane in his burning car.

“是吗？”克鲁利说，“我真没留意。”他说完就坐在燃烧的轿车里，沿着小路开始倒车。

I would like to draw your attention to a recent tendency I have noticed for today’s young people to ignore perfectly sensible safety precautions while driving. This evening I was asked for directions by a gentleman whose car was…

我希望能引起您对最近一些不良倾向的注意，我发现如今的年轻人开车时，完全不在乎完美合理的安全防范措施。今晚有位绅士向我问路，他的车…

No.

不。

Driving a car that…

开着一辆…

Sir,

先生，

It was on fire…

着了火…

No.

不。

“Funny weather we’re having, isn’t it?” he said, lamely.

“今天天气真古怪，不是吗？”他没话找话地说。

“Hoy!” shouted R. P. Tyler. “Young!”

“嗨！”R.P。泰勒喊道，“扬！”

His temper getting worse, R. P. Tyler stomped the final stretch back into the village.

R.P。泰勒的脾气越来越糟。他跺着脚走完最后一段路程，回到镇上。

To The Editor

致编辑：

Mr. Young sighed. “What’s he done now?”

扬先生叹了口气。“他又干什么了？”

And he went inside.

扬先生走进了屋子。

“Do you know where he is?”

“你知道他在哪儿吗？”

“Hmp,” he said. “I see,” he said.

“嗯。”他说，“我知道了。”

“Good.”

“很好啊。”

“Right,” he said.

“好的。”他又说。

Mr. Young took his pipe out of his mouth and examined the stem thoughtfully.

扬先生把烟斗从嘴里拿出来，若有所思地检查着口柄。

“You know how strict they are up there,” said Mr. Tyler, in case Mr. Young hadn’t got the message.

“你知道那地方规章有多严格。”泰勒先生生怕扬先生不解其意。

“Yes?”

“嗯？”

Mr. Young puffed on his pipe.

扬先生抽了口烟。

“Your son, Adam.”

“你儿子，亚当。”

Tyler grinned, tightly, triumphantly. “I doubt it. I saw him and his little fiends, and that appalling mongrel, not half an hour ago, cycling towards the air base.”

泰勒露出趾高气扬的冷笑。“我可不这么想。不到半小时前，我看见他和那些小伙伴们，骑着车朝空军基地去了。当然还有那条可怕的杂种狗。”

Mr. Young checked his watch. “Getting ready for bed, I would assume.”

扬先生看看手表。“我估计，应该准备上床睡觉了。”

At exactly that same moment, four motorbikes swished to a halt a few hundred yards from the main gate. The riders switched off their engines and raised their helmet visors. Well, three of them did.

与此同时，四位摩托车手猛然停在距离基地大门几百码的地方。他们关闭引擎，抬起面罩。哦，其中三位这样做了。

“I was rather hoping we could crash through the barriers,” said War wistfully.

“我真希望咱们可以直接闯过这些路障。”战争希冀地说。

“You know what a one your son is for pressing buttons and things,” he added.

“你知道你儿子要是胡乱按钮什么的，肯定会被臭骂一顿。”他补充说。

“That’d only cause trouble,” said Famine.

“那只会惹麻烦。”饥荒说。

“Weren’t we supposed to meet… someone?” said War.

“咱们是不是应该遇到…什么人？”战争说。

“This isn’t how I imagined it, chaps,” said War. “I haven’t been waiting for thousands of years just to fiddle around with bits of wire. It’s not what you’d call dramatic. Albrecht Durer didn’t waste his time doing woodcuts of the Four Button-Pressers of the Apocalypse, I do know that.”

“这跟我想象的不一样，伙计们。”战争说，“我等了好几千年，可不是为了鼓捣几根电线。这可谈不上戏剧化。我敢说阿尔布雷希特·丢勒[8]不会浪费时间绘制一幅名为天启四按钮者的版画。”【注：[8]德国画家。文艺复兴时期最伟大的艺术家。他多才多艺，学识渊博。不仅是油画家，还是铜版画家、雕刻家、建筑师。】

“Look at it like this,” said Famine. “It’s just groundwork. We get to do the riding forth afterwards. The proper riding forth. Wings of the storm and so on. You’ve got to be flexible.”

“你们可以这么看。”饥荒说，“这只是基础工作。咱们之后还可以继续骑行。正经的骑行。风暴之翼什么的。你们要有灵活性。”

“Trouble for us, I mean. The power and phone lines must be down, but they’re bound to have generators and they’ll certainly have radio. If someone starts reporting that terrorists have invaded the base then people’ll start acting logically and the whole Plan collapses.”

“我是说，给咱们惹麻烦。电力系统和电话线都断了，但他们应该有发电机，而且肯定有无线电。如果有人报告有恐怖分子入侵基地，人们就会恢复理性，整个计划就完蛋了。”

“Huh.”

“哼。”

WE GO IN, WE DO THE JOB, WE GO OUT, WE LET HUMAN NATURE TAKE ITS COURSE, said Death.

咱们进去，咱们干活，咱们出来。咱们让人类的天性行使自己的职责，死神说。

“I thought there’d be trumpets,” said Pollution.

“我还以为会有号角什么的。”污染说。

There was no sound but the metallic noises of cooling motorbike engines.

除了逐渐冷却的摩托车引擎发出的金属噪声外，四周万籁俱寂。

Then Pollution said, slowly, “You know, I can’t say I imagined it’d be somewhere like this, either. I thought it’d be, well, a big city. Or a big country. New York, perhaps. Or Moscow. Or Armageddon itself.”

污染缓缓说道：“你们知道，我也没想到是这种地方。我还以为会是，哦，一座大都市。或是一个大国。也许是纽约。或者莫斯科。或者世界末日大决战本身。”

“I think I went there once,” said Pollution. “The old city of Megiddo. Just before it fell down. Nice place. Interesting royal gateway.”

“我想我去过一次。”污染说，“美吉多老城。就在它垮掉之前。好地方。有趣的皇家大门。”

“Funny you should ask,” said Famine. “I’ve always meant to look it up.”

“问得好。”饥荒说，“我一直想去这地方看看。”

War looked at the greenness around them.

战争看着周围的盈盈绿地。

“There’s an Armageddon, Pennsylvania,” said Pollution. “Or maybe it’s Massachusetts, or one of them places. Lots of guys in heavy beards and seriously black hats.”

“宾夕法尼亚州有个叫世界末日大决战的地方。”污染说，“也可能是马萨诸塞州，或是别的某个州。有很多留大胡子的人，还戴着庄重的黑帽子。”

“Nah,” said Famine. “It’s somewhere in Israel, I think.”

“不对。”饥荒说，“我想应该是以色列的某个地方。”

MOUNT CARMEL.

卡梅尔山。

“Is that right? That’s one big avocado.”

“是吗？这可真是老大一棵鳄梨树。”

There was another pause.

又是一阵沉寂。

War coughed. “It’s just that I thought that… he’d be coming with us…?”

战争咳嗽一声。“我只是以为…他会跟咱们一起来…”

THE GEOGRAPHY IS IMMATERIAL.

地理并不重要。

Then War said, “Where is Armageddon, anyway?”

战争说：“对了，世界末日大决战到底在哪儿？”

“Boy,” she said, “did we take a wrong turning.”

“伙计，”她说，“咱们是不是拐错弯了？”

LET US GO.

走吧。

AND THE END OF THE WORLD.

世界尽头。

IF ARMAGEDDON IS ANYWHERE, IT IS EVERYWHERE.

如果世界末日大决战无所不在，那它就在任何地方。

“I thought that was where they grow avocados.”

“我还以为那是他们种鳄梨树的地方。”

“Sorry, lord?”

“抱歉，阁下？”

There was another pause.

又是一阵寂静。

“That’s right,” said Famine, “we’re not talking about a few square miles of scrub and goats anymore.”

“没错。”饥荒说，“咱们所说的，不再是几平方英里的树丛和山羊。”

Four generals got out. Again, the sergeant was a little uncertain of why he had thought this. They had proper identification. What kind of identification, admittedly, he couldn’t quite recall, but it was proper. He saluted.

四位将军走下车。中士同样不知道自己为何会这么想。他们出示了有效身份证明。到底是哪种证明，他承认自己记不清了。但肯定有效。戴森博格敬了个礼。

A large staff car drew up by the gate. It was sleek and officiallooking although, afterwards, he wasn’t entirely sure why he had thought this, or why it sounded momentarily as though it were powered by motorbike engines.

一辆很大的高级官员专车停在门口。车型修长，像模像样。但事后回想起来，他也说不清自己为什么会有这种感觉，更不明白为何它听起来像是装了摩托车引擎。

THIS, he said firmly, IS A JOB FOR THE PROFESSIONALS.

他笃定地说，这是为专家准备的工作。

Death adjusted his gauntlets.

死神抻了抻手套。

Afterwards, Sgt. Thomas A. Deisenburger recalled events at the gate as having happened like this:

托马斯·A。戴森博格中士日后回想起来，发生在门口的事是这样的：

To which Sgt. Thomas A. Deisenburger replied, “Sir, I have not been informated as to the incidence of a surprise inspection at this time, sir.”

托马斯·A。戴森博格中士答道：“长官，我没接到要进行突击检查的通知，长官。”

And one of them said, “Surprise inspection, soldier.”

其中一人说：“突击检查，士兵。”

The sergeant saluted again.

中士又敬了个礼。

“Of course not,” said one of the generals. “That’s because it’s a surprise.”

“当然没有。”一位将军说，“因为这是突击检查。”

“Sir, permission to confirmate this intelligence with base command, sir,” he said, uneasily.

“长官，请允许我跟基地司令部核实这一信息，长官。”他不安地说。

One of the others put a friendly arm around the sergeant’s shoulders and leaned forward in a conspiratorial way.

另一位将军友好地揽住中士的肩膀，稍显诡秘地探过身去。

“Now see here –” he squinted at the sergeant’s name tag “– Deisenburger, maybe I’ll give you a break. It’s a surprise inspection, got that? Surprise. That means no getting on the horn the moment we’ve gone through, understand? And no leaving your post. Career soldier like you’ll understand, am I right?” he added. He winked. “Otherwise you’ll find yourself busted so low you’ll have to say ‘sir’ to an imp.”

“听我说…”他瞟了一眼中士的名牌，“…戴森博格，也许我可以给你就交点底。这是一次突击检查，明白吗？突击。也就意味着我们通过时不要惊扰任何人，懂吗？也不要离开你的岗位。像你这样的职业士兵肯定明白，我没说错吧？”他挤了下眼睛，又补充道，“不然你会发现自己被降职到最底层，见到个小恶魔都得喊长官。”

“What?”

“什么？”

“Private,” hissed one of the other generals. According to her tag, her name was Waugh. Sgt. Deisenburger had never seen a female general like her before, but she was certainly an improvement.

“二等兵。”另一个将军轻声说道。从名牌来看，她叫詹铮。戴森博格从没见过像她这样的女将军，但这无疑是军界一大进步。

The tallest and thinnest of the generals strolled a little way from the group, turned his back, and folded his arms.

最高最瘦的将军往前踱了几步，转过身去，把手抱在胸前。

Sgt. Thomas A. Deisenburger stared at him.

托马斯·A。戴森博格中士盯着他。

“Yeah. That’s what I meant. Yeah. Private. Okay, soldier?”

“对。我就是这个意思。对。二等兵。明白吗，小伙子？”

“Private. Not imp.”

“二等兵。不是小恶魔。”

The sergeant considered the very limited number of options at his disposal.

中士考虑着眼前十分有限的几个选项。

“Sir, affirmative, sir,” said the sergeant.

“长官，明白，长官。”中士说。

“Provisionatedly classificisioned at this time,” said Famine, who had spent years learning how to sell to the federal government and could feel the language coming back to him.

“出于国家安全考量，临时予以保密处理。”饥荒这些年一直在学习如何把东西卖给联邦政府，这些官腔又冒了出来。

“Sir, surprise inspection, sir?” he said.

“长官，突击检查，长官？”他说。

“Good man,” said Famine, as the barrier was raised. “You’ll go a long way.” He glanced at his watch. “Very shortly.”

“好孩子。”栏杆升起时，饥荒说，“你会一步登天的。”他看了眼手表，“很快。”

Sometimes human beings are very much like bees. Bees are fiercely protective of their hive, provided you are outside it. Once you’re in, the workers sort of assume that it must have been cleared by management and take no notice; various freeloading insects have evolved a mellifluous existence because of this very fact. Humans act the same way.

人类有时很像蜜蜂。假如你在蜂巢外面，就会遭到顽强抵抗。可工蜂们似乎认为主管部门肯定会保证巢穴内部的安全，所以你一旦进入，就不会被注意。正因如此，有些寄居昆虫进化出了完美形态。人类的行为与此类似。

No one stopped the four as they purposefully made their way into one of the long, low buildings under the forest of radio masts. No one paid any attention to them. Perhaps they saw nothing at all. Perhaps they saw what their minds were instructed to see, because the human brain is not equipped to see War, Famine, Pollution, and Death when they don’t want to be seen, and has got so good at not seeing that it often manages not to see them even when they abound on every side.

谁也没有阻止他们。天线杆森林下有一排低矮狭长的建筑，四人径直走向其中之一。谁都没注意他们。也许人们什么都没看到。也许他们看到的是头脑自以为看到的东西。因为在战争、饥荒、污染和死神不想被发现时，人类的大脑并没有识别他们的功能。实际上，它太擅长视而不见了，就算被他们团团围住，也会设法置若罔闻。

Newt did not smoke, because he did not allow nicotine to gain entry to the temple of his body or, more accurately, the small Welsh Methodist tin tabernacle of his body. If he had been a smoker, he would have choked on the cigarette that he would have been smoking at this time in order to steady his nerves.

牛顿不抽烟，他不允许尼古丁进入身体的神庙，或者更准确地说，是身体的威尔士公理会劣质小神龛。如果他是个烟鬼，现在肯定会为了稳定心情开始吸烟，那么在警报声响起时，就会被烟卷噎住。

The alarms were totally brainless and thought they saw four people where people shouldn’t be, and went off like anything.

但警报器是完全没脑子的东西，它们自以为看到了不可能存在的四个人，发疯似的响个没完。

Anathema stood up purposefully and smoothed the creases in her skirt.

安娜丝玛镇静自若地站起来，抚平裙子上的皱褶。

“No. They’ve got better guns, for one thing,” said Newt.

“对。首先，他们的枪更好。”牛顿说。

“Don’t worry,” she said. “They don’t apply to us. Something’s probably happening inside.”

“别担心。”她说，“不是因为咱们。基地里肯定出了什么事。”

She smiled at his pale face. “Come on,” she said, “It’s not the O. K. Corral.”

她看着牛顿苍白的面庞，露齿一笑。“来吧，”她说，“这不是《OK镇大决斗》[9]。”【注：[9]西部片名匠约翰·史都区在五十年代拍摄的经典影片，讲述美国西部传奇英雄怀特·厄普与霍利迪医生的故事。剧情重点放在OK镇的一场正邪大战。】

It was inevitable that all four of them couldn’t contribute equally, War thought. She’d been surprised at her natural affinity for modern weapons systems, which were so much more efficient than bits of sharp metal, and of course Pollution laughed at absolutely foolproof, fail-safe devices. Even Famine at least knew what computers were. Whereas… well, he didn’t do anything much except hang around, although he did it with a certain style. It had occurred to War that there might one day be an end to War, an end to Famine, possibly even an end to Pollution, and perhaps this was why the fourth and greatest horseman was never exactly what you might call one of the lads. It was like having a tax inspector in your football team. Great to have him on your side, of course, but not the kind of person you wanted to have a drink and a chat with in the bar afterwards. You couldn’t be one hundred percent at your ease.

战争心想，他们四个人绝不可能贡献相当。她惊奇地发现自己对现代武器系统有种与生俱来的亲和力，这些东西的效能比带尖的金属片强太多。简单易懂、绝对可靠的安全防控装置总让污染笑逐颜开。饥荒至少也知道电脑是怎么回事。但他…是的，他除了在附近闲晃以外，几乎什么也没干。但他就连游手好闲也有种独特风范。战争曾经想过，也许有一天战争会终结，饥荒会终结，也许就连污染也会终结。可能正因如此，你永远没法把第四位骑士——也是最强大的骑士，彻底当成自己人。这就像有个税务监察员在你的球队里。有他在你们这边当然很好，但你决不希望踢完球后跟他到酒吧喝上一杯，闲聊几句。有他在场，你永远不能完全放松。

She helped him up. “Never mind,” she said. “I’m sure you’ll think of a way.”

安娜丝玛把他扶起来。“别担心。”他说，“我相信你会想出个办法来。”

“Seven-segment LED displays,” said the boy. He laid loving hands on a bank of relays, which fused under his touch, and then introduced a swathe of self-replicating viruses that whirred away on the electronic ether.

“七段LED显示器。”男孩说。他充满爱怜地把手放在一个继电器盒上，让它短路，随即制造出一堆可以自我复制的病毒，任由它们在电子以太中肆意扩散。

A couple of soldiers ran through him as he looked over Pollution’s skinny shoulder.

死神站在污染身后，从他瘦削的肩头上望过去。与此同时，有几名士兵径直穿过了死神的身躯。

WHAT ARE THOSE GLITTERY THINGS? he said, in the tones of one who knows he won’t be able to understand the answer but wants to be seen to be taking an interest.

那些闪来闪去的东西是什么？你可以从这种语气判断出来，他知道自己不会理解对方给出的答案，只想表现出对此有点兴趣罢了。

War reached inside another metal cabinet. This wasn’t the way she’d expected things to be, she had to admit, but when she ran her fingers over and sometimes through the electronics there was a familiar feel. It was an echo of what you got when you held a sword, and she felt a thrill of anticipation at the thought that this sword enclosed the whole world and a certain amount of the sky above it, as well. It loved her.

战争把手伸进另一个金属柜。必须承认，她没想到事情会变成这个样子。但当她伸手抚摸——有时是抚过——这些电子仪器时，心中备感亲切。这跟手持利剑时的感觉差不多，而且她知道这把剑足以笼罩整个世界，再加上部分苍天。这种感觉令她陶醉，让她战栗。它爱她。

“I don’t know, I rather liked them,” said Pollution.

“是吗，我还挺喜欢它们的。”污染说。

Death absentmindedly snapped his fingers. A dozen klaxons gurgled and died.

死神心不在焉地打了个响指。十几个高音喇叭一阵哽咽，随即没了声音。

“I could really do without those bloody alarms,” muttered Famine.

“我真希望那些该死的警报器能安静一会儿。”饥荒嘟囔道。

He’d seen many identity cards in his time — military, CIA, FBI, KGB even — and, being a young soldier, had yet to grasp that the more insignificant an organization is, the more impressive are its identity cards.

他参军入伍以来，见识过很多身份证明。军方的、中情局的、联邦调查局的，甚至是克格勃的。但作为一名年轻士兵，他还没掌握这个诀窍：组织越不重要，身份证明就越华丽。

A flaming sword.

它是一把炎剑。

Mankind had not been very good at learning that swords are dangerous if left lying around, although it had done its limited best to make sure that the chances of one this size being wielded accidentally were high. A cheering thought, that. It was nice to think that mankind made a distinction between blowing their planet to bits by accident and doing it by design.

人类老是记不住，把利剑随便乱放会有危险。但他们已经竭尽全力，让自己相信这种尺寸的武器被意外挥舞起来的概率相当高。这真是令人愉快的想法。在把自己的星球炸成碎片这件事上，人类对有意无意之分看得很重。

Pollution plunged his hands into another rack of expensive electronics.

污染又把手伸进另一排昂贵的电子仪器。

The guard on the hole in the fence looked puzzled. He was aware of excitement back in the base, and his radio seemed to be picking up nothing but static, and his eyes were being drawn again and again to the card in front of him.

守卫围墙破洞的卫兵一脸迷惑。他察觉到基地里乱成了一锅粥，但除了静电噪声外，对讲机似乎没有接收到任何信息。与此同时，他正一遍又一遍地审视着眼前这张卡片。

This one was hellishly impressive. His lips moved as he read it again, all the way from “The Lord Protector of the Common Wealth of Britain charges and demands,” through the bit about commandeering all kindling, rope, and igniferous oils, right down to the signature of the WA’s first Lord Adjutant, Praise-him-all-Ye-works-of-the-Lord-and-Flye-Fornication Smith. Newt kept his thumb over the bit about Nine Pence Per Witch and tried to look like James Bond.

这张身份卡简直华丽得要死。他又看了一遍，嘴里默念着上面的内容，从“英联邦护国主要求并命令”开始，经过征集所有柴薪、绳子和火油的部分，一直读到猎巫军第一任参事官赞美我主所有功绩且需规避淫行·史密斯的名字。牛顿用拇指挡住了“每个女巫九便士”的部分，努力装出詹姆斯·邦德的样子。

“Oh, we have to have them,” said Newt. “We burn them.”

“哦，我们必须得到这些。”牛顿说，“我们要烧它们。”

The guard’s face broadened into a grin. And they’d told him England was soft. “Right on!” he said.

卫兵嘴角一咧，露出笑容。别人跟他说过，英国佬都是软蛋。“明白了！”他说。

“Say what?”

“说什么？”

“We burn them.”

“烧它们。”

“What’s this here,” he said suspiciously, “about us got to give you faggots?”

“这东西。”他狐疑地说，“是要我们给你柴火？”

Well, it’s true, she thought as she saw the man stiffen in terror. If he doesn’t drop the gun he’ll find out this is a stick, and I shall really regret having to be shot.

卫兵吓得身子一僵。哦，我没撒谎，安娜丝玛心想，如果他不扔下枪，就会发现这是根树枝。我肯定会为死于枪下感到后悔。

At the main gate, Sgt. Thomas A. Deisenburger was also having problems. A little man in a dirty mack kept pointing a finger at him and muttering, while a lady who looked slightly like his mother talked to him in urgent tones and kept interrupting herself in a different voice.

在大门口，托马斯·A。戴森博格中士又遇上了麻烦。有个小个子男人，身穿脏兮兮的橡胶雨衣，伸出食指对着他，嘴里还嘟嘟囔囔的。与此同时，一位有点像他母亲的中年女士用急迫的口吻跟他说话，还时常被一种完全不同的声音打断。

Finally the guard’s probing intellect found a word he thought he recognized.

卫兵来回查看，最终找到一个他自以为认识的词。

“Drop your gun,” said Anathema, behind him, “or I shall regret what I shall have to do next.”

“放下枪。”安娜丝玛在他身后说，“不然我会为我接下来要做的事感到后悔。”

Something pressed into the small of his back.

有什么东西顶在他的腰眼上。

“It really is vitally important that we are allowed to speak to whoever is in charge,” said Aziraphale. “I really must ask that he’s right, you know, I’d be able to tell if he was lying yes, thank you, I think we’d really achieve something if you kindly allowed me to carry on all right thank you I was only trying to put in a good word Yes! Er. You were asking him to yes all right… now –“

“我们必须跟这里的主管官员谈谈，此事关系重大。”亚茨拉菲尔说，“我必须要求他说得对，你知道，如果他在撒谎我能听出来是的，谢谢，我想如果您允许我继续说下去，咱们还有可能成功我只是想替你说句好话是的！呃，你想让他对好吧…那么…”

Sgt. Deisenburger stared at the black and purple nail a few inches from his face. As an offensive weapon it rated quite highly, especially if it was ever used in the preparation of food.

戴森博格中士盯着这根手指，黑得发紫的指甲距离他的脸只有几英寸之遥。作为一件攻击性武器，它的效能相当显著，如果用于烹调食物则更是如此。

“D’yer see my finger?” shouted Shadwell, whose sanity was still attached to him but only on the end of along and rather frayed string. “D’yer see it? This finger, laddie, could send ye to meet yer Maker!”

“看见俺指头了吗？”沙德维尔吼道。他的理智还没完全丧失，但已经挂在一根相当破旧的绳子尽头。“侬看见了吗？这根手指，小赤佬，可以把侬送去见造物主！”

The telephone gave him nothing but static. He’d been told not to leave his post. His wound from Nam was starting to play up. [He’d slipped and fallen in a hotel shower when he took a holiday there in 1983. Now the mere sight of a bar of yellow soap could send him into near-fatal flashbacks.] He wondered how much trouble he could get into for shooting non-American civilians.

对讲机里只有沙沙噪声。他又不能离开岗位。戴森博格中士在越南受的伤开始抽痛。（他1983年到那里度假时，滑倒在旅馆淋浴间。如今只要一看见黄色肥皂条，就会让他回想起那次濒死体验。）他琢磨着射杀非美国公民会给自己带来多大麻烦。

The four bicycles pulled up a little way from the base. Tire marks in the dust, and a patch of oil, indicated that other travelers had briefly rested there.

四辆自行车在基地不远处停下。土地上的轮胎印和一摊机油，说明不久前有人就停在这里。

“I’m thinking,” said Adam.

“我在考虑。”亚当说。

“What’re we stopping for?” said Pepper.

“咱们停下来干吗？”佩帕说。

It was hard. The bit of his mind that he knew as himself was still there, but it was trying to stay afloat on a fountain of tumultuous darkness. What he was aware of, though, was that his three companions were onehundred percent human. He’d got them into trouble before, in the way of torn clothes, docked pocket money, and so on, but this one was almost certainly going to involve a lot more than being confined to the house and made to tidy up your room.

这很不容易。属于他自己的那部分心智并未丧失，但却试图漂浮在黑暗欢腾的泉水之上。尽管如此，亚当还是意识到，三个小伙伴都是百分之百的人类。他此前也给他们惹上过麻烦，撕破的衣服、克扣的零花钱，诸如此类的事情。但这次肯定要比在家里关禁闭和被迫收拾房间麻烦得多。

“Hi,” he said. “How’s it going? Has the world ended yet?”

“嗨。”他说，“怎么样了？末日已经降临了吗？”

Just to make Sgt. Deisenburger’s day, a car pulled up and it was floating several inches off the ground because it had no tires. Or paintwork. What it did have was a trail of blue smoke, and when it stopped it made the pinging noises made by metal cooling down from a very high temperature.

为了让戴森博格中士的日子更加完美，一辆车停在基地门口。它完全飘在空中，距离地面几英寸之遥；没有轮胎，也没油漆，只有一溜蓝色尾烟。它停下来后，发出一阵乒乒乓乓的声音，似乎是高温金属正在冷却。

“All right,” he said. “We need some stuff, I think. We need a sword, a crown, and some scales.”

“好吧。”他说，“我想咱们需要点东西。咱们需要一柄剑、一个王冠，再来个天平。”

They stared at him.

他们瞪着他。

“What, just here?” said Brian. “There’s nothin’ like that here.”

“什么，在这儿？”布赖恩说，“这里哪儿有那些东西。”

It looked as if it had smoked glass windows, although this was just an effect caused by it having ordinary glass windows but a smoke-filled interior.

它看上去似乎装有烟色玻璃，但那只是普通玻璃加车内滚滚浓烟形成的效果。

The driver’s door opened, and a cloud of choking fumes got out. Then Crowley followed it.

驾驶席一侧的车门打开，一股呛人的烟雾冒了出来，紧随其后的是克鲁利。

He waved the smoke away from his face, blinked, and then turned the gesture into a friendly wave.

他驱散面前的烟气，眨了眨眼，随即将手部动作变成打招呼的样子。

On the other hand, there wasn’t anyone else.

但另一方面，也没别人能指望了。

“He won’t let us in, Crowley,” said Madame Tracy.

“他不让我们进去，克鲁利。”特蕾西夫人说。

“I dunno,” said Adam. “When you think about the games and that, you know, we’ve played…”

“哦。”亚当说，“想想那些游戏，你们知道，咱们玩过…”

They stared at him.

所有人都在瞅他。

“You wouldn’t get that sort of performance out of one of these modern cars,” he said lovingly.

“要换成现在的新型汽车，不可能有这么好的表现。”他怜爱地说。

There was a little electronic click.

一阵嘀嘀嗒嗒的电子音轻轻响起。

“Aziraphale? Is that you? Nice dress,” said Crowley vaguely. He wasn’t feeling very well. For the last thirty miles he had been imagining that a ton of burning metal, rubber, and leather was a fully-functioning automobile, and the Bentley had been resisting him fiercely. The hard part had been to keep the whole thing rolling after the all-weather radials had burned away. Beside him the remains of the Bentley dropped suddenly onto its distorted wheel rims as he stopped imagining that it had tires.

“亚茨拉菲尔？是你吗？衣服不错。”克鲁利含糊其辞地说。他感觉不太好。过去三十分钟内，他始终把一吨燃烧的金属、橡胶和皮革，想象成一辆功能完备的汽车。宾利车对他进行了殊死抵抗。最难的部分莫过于全天候轮胎被烧光后，让这东西继续转动。克鲁利放弃了对轮胎的想象，宾利车的残骸猛然落在扭曲的金属轮缘上。

Zip. Zip. Zip. Zip. And a small dog, its legs a blur.

噌。噌。噌。噌。然后是一条小狗，四腿狂奔，快得让人看不清。

The gate was rising. The housing that contained the electric motor gave a mechanical groan, and then gave up in the face of the unstoppable force acting on the barrier.

大门缓缓上升。容纳电动机的金属框架发出呻吟，但面对作用在栏杆上的不可抗力，它最终还是屈服了。

They stared at the four ferociously pedaling figures that ducked under the barrier and disappeared into the camp.

他们眼看着四个玩命蹬车的人影从栏杆下面钻了过去，消失在营地中。

He patted a metal surface hot enough to fry eggs on.

他拍了拍热到足以煎鸡蛋的金属外壳。

“Hey!” said Sgt. Deisenburger, “Which one of you yo-yos did that?”

“嗨！”戴森博格中士说，“这是你们谁干的？”

“Then,” said Sgt. Deisenburger, “they’re in real trouble.” He raised his gun. Enough of this pussyfooting around; he kept thinking of soap. “And so,” he said, “are you.”

“那么，”戴森博格说，“他们就有大麻烦了。”他举起手里的枪。谨小慎微就到此为止了，他脑袋里现在全都是肥皂。“另外，”他说，“你们也一样。”

“Well done,” said Crowley. “Never thought you had it in you.”

“干得好。”克鲁利说，“没想到你也会这么干。”

“No,” said Aziraphale. “Nor did I, in fact. I do hope I haven’t sent him somewhere dreadful.”

“哦。”亚茨拉菲尔说，“实际上我也没想到。只希望我没把他送到什么可怕的地方。”

“I warns ye –” Shadwell began.

“我警告你…”沙德维尔又开口说。

“Hey,” he said, but much more weakly this time, “did any of them kids have some space alien with a face like a friendly turd in a bike basket?”

“呃，”他很没底气地说，“这帮孩子车筐里有没有个外星人，脸长得好像一坨友善的大便？”

“Er,” said Aziraphale.

“呃。”亚茨拉菲尔说。

“This has gone on too long,” said Aziraphale. “Sort it out, Crowley, there’s a dear chap.”

“这时间拖得也太长了。”亚茨拉菲尔说，“赶快搞定，克鲁利，这才是好伙计。”

The sergeant pulled himself together.

中士打起精神。

“Don’t think so,” said Crowley.

“我没看到。”克鲁利说。

There was a pop like an old-fashioned flashbulb, and Sgt. Thomas A. Deisenburger disappeared.

“嘭”的一声凭空响起，仿佛老式闪光灯泡的爆响。托马斯·A。戴森博格中士不见了。

“I’m the nice one,” said Aziraphale. “You can’t expect me to — oh, blast it. You try to do the decent thing, and where does it get you?” He snapped his fingers.

“我是正义一方。”亚茨拉菲尔说，“你不能指望我…哦，见鬼去吧。我一辈子循规蹈矩的，结果怎么样？”他打了个响指。

“See?” said Shadwell, who hadn’t quite got the hang of Madame Tracy’s split personality, “nothing to it. Ye stick by me, yell be all right.”

“瞅见了吧？”沙德维尔说，他还没彻底领会特蕾西夫人双重人格的真相，“小菜一碟儿。侬跟着俺，就屁事没有。”

“Hmm?” said Crowley.

“哦？”克鲁利说。

“Let’s get on in,” said Crowley. He looked sadly at the wreckage of the Bentley, and then brightened. A jeep was heading purposefully towards the gate, and it looked as though it was crowded with people who were about to shout questions and fire guns and not worry about which order they did this in.

“咱们进去吧。”克鲁利说。他难过地看了一眼宾利车残骸，接着又高兴起来。一辆吉普车正朝大门开来，车上挤满了人。这帮人似乎随时准备高声问话，或是开枪射击，才不管是奉了谁的命令。

“You’d better get used to it right now,” said Crowley. “You just send ’em. Best not to worry about where they go.” He looked fascinated. “Aren’t you going to introduce me to your new body?”

“你最好赶紧适应一下。”克鲁利说，“你只是把他们送走。别操心他们去了什么地方。”他显出饶有兴趣的样子，“不打算给我介绍一下你的新身体吗？”

He took his hands out of his pockets and he raised them like Bruce Lee and then he smiled like Lee van Cleef. “Ah,” he said, “here comes transport.”

他从兜里抽出手来，像李小龙那样缓缓抬起，脸上挂着李·范·克里[10]式的笑容。“啊，”他说，“咱们的车来了。”【注：[10]西部片明星，参演过《黄金三镖客》《正午》等名片。】

He brightened up. This was more what you might call his area of competence.

克鲁利眼光一亮。可以说这才是最适合他的工作领域。

“Oh? Yes. Yes, of course. Madame Tracy, this is Crowley. Crowley, Madame Tracy. Charmed, I’m sure.”

“哦？好的。好的，当然。特蕾西夫人，这是克鲁利。克鲁利，这是特蕾西夫人。真迷人，我得说。”

They parked their bikes outside one of the low buildings. Wensleydale carefully locked his. He was that kind of boy.

他们把自行车停在一栋低矮的建筑物外面。温斯利戴将车仔细锁好。他就是这种孩子。

“They could look like all sorts,” said Adam doubtfully.

“什么样都可能。”亚当含含糊糊地说。

“So what will these people look like?” said Pepper.

“那么这些人长什么样？”佩帕说。

“They’re grownups, are they?” said Pepper.

“他们是大人，对吗？”佩帕说。

“Fightin’ grownups is never any use,” said Wensleydale gloomily. “You always get into trouble.”

“跟大人较劲根本没用。”温斯利戴灰心丧气地说，“最后倒霉的总是你。”

“You don’t have to fight ’em,” said Adam. “You just do what I told you.

“你不用跟他们较劲。”亚当说，“你们照我说的做就行了。”

The Them looked at the things they were carrying. As far as tools to mend the world were concerned, they did not look incredibly efficient.

“他们”看了看自己带来的东西。作为拯救世界的工具，它们看起来不是特别有效。

“How’ll we find ’em, then?” said Brian, doubtfully. “I remember when we came to the Open Day, it’s all rooms and stuff. Lots of rooms and flashing lights.”

“咱们怎么才能找到他们？”布赖恩疑惑地问道，“我记得咱们在开放日来参观时，这里全是房间什么的。好多房间和一闪一闪的灯泡。”

“Yes,” said Adam. “More grown-up than you’ve ever seen before, I reckon.”

“对。”亚当说，“比你以前见过的所有人都大很多，我估计。”

“Well,” he said, “it seems to me –“

“嗯。”他说，“我觉得…”

“Hey, what are you kids doing here?”

“嗨，你们这些孩子跑到这儿来干什么？”

It wasn’t a one hundred percent threatening voice, but it was near the end of its tether and it belonged to an officer who’d spent ten minutes trying to make sense of a senseless world where alarms went off and doors didn’t open. Two equally harassed soldiers stood behind him, slightly at a loss as to how to deal with four short and clearly Caucasian juveniles, one of them marginally female.

这不是百分之百的威胁口吻，但跟这个范畴相去不远；而且它出自一名有些神经质的军官之口，他刚花了十分钟想要搞清这个警钟长鸣、大门不开的混沌世界到底出了什么问题。两名同样烦躁的士兵站在他身后，显得有些不知所措。他们面前的四个嫌疑人个头很矮，显然是白种少年，其中之一似乎还是女性。

Adam stared thoughtfully at the buildings. The alarms were still yodelling.

亚当若有所思地盯着眼前一栋栋房舍。警报器还在嗡嗡作响。

“Don’t you worry about us,” said Adam airily. “We’re jus’ lookin’ around.”

“不用替我们操心。”亚当轻松地说，“我们只是随便看看。”

The lieutenant stared at him, his eyes trying to focus. Then he pitched forward.

军官盯着亚当，目光试图聚焦，接着直挺挺地倒在地上。

“Go to sleep,” said Adam. “You just go to sleep. All you soldiers here go to sleep. Then you won’t get hurt. You all just go to sleep now.”

“睡吧。”亚当说，“你们只想睡觉。你们几个都去睡吧，如此一来就不会受伤。你们现在只想睡觉。”

“Well, it’s sort of like that, only now I’ve found how to do it.” He turned back to the communications building.

“哦，跟那个有点类似，只是我现在知道该怎么做了。”他转过身，面对通信大楼。

“Now you just –” the lieutenant began.

“现在你们…”领头的尉官说。

“Yes?”

“怎么？”

If you took the world away and just left the electricity, it would look like the most exquisite filigree ever made — a ball of twinkling silver lines with the occasional coruscating spike of a satellite beam. Even the dark areas would glow with radar and commercial radio waves. It could be the nervous system of a great beast.

如果你把整个世界拿走，只留下电子系统，它看起来就像是有史以来最精美典雅的细丝工艺品。一个由晶莹银丝组成的球体，间或有些卫星信号束闪烁脉动。就连最暗的地方也会放射出雷达波和商用无线电波。就像一头巨兽的神经系统。

“Right,” he said.

“好吧。”亚当说。

He pulled himself together, his body unfolding from its habitual comfortable slouch into an upright bearing Mr. Tyler would have been proud of.

亚当挺起腰板，整个人从惯常的懒散状态中伸展开来。泰勒先生如果看到这一幕，肯定会感到骄傲。

“Well,” said Adam cautiously, “you know that bit about hypnotism in the Boy’s Own Book of 101 Things To Dothat we could never make work?”

“哦。”亚当谨慎地说，“你记得《男孩要做的101件事》里有关催眠术的内容吗，咱们一直没成功？”

“Coo,” said Pepper, as the others collapsed, “how did you do that?”

“酷。”另外两名士兵倒下时，佩帕说，“你是怎么做到的？”

He thought for a while. Then he said, “Come and see.”

他想了想，然后又说：“试试看吧。”

And now it was alive, in the same way that fire is alive. Switches were welding shut. Relays fused. In the heart of silicon chips whose microscopic architecture looked like a street plan of Los Angeles fresh pathways opened up, and hundreds of miles away bells rang in underground rooms and men stared in horror at what certain screens were telling them. Heavy steel doors shut firmly in secret hollow mountains, leaving people on the other side to pound on them and wrestle with fuse boxes which had melted. Bits of desert and tundra slid aside, letting fresh air into air-conditioned tombs, and blunt shapes ground ponderously into position.

现如今它活了，就跟火焰一样鲜活。开关猛然关闭。继电器短路。精密技术工程师常把硅基芯片比作洛杉矶街道设计图，那么新兴的道路此时正在它的内部铺展；数百英里外的地下室中，警铃响个不停，人们惊骇地注视着屏幕上显示的信息。在中空的秘密山脉中，厚重钢门牢牢关闭，任由人们在对面拼命捶打，或是与已经融化的保险丝盒较劲。沙漠和苔原中，有几块地面突然滑开，让新鲜空气进入装有空调设备的墓穴，一些钝头物体笨拙地从地下升起，缓缓就位。

And while it flowed where it should not, it ebbed from its normal beds. In cities the traffic lights went, then the street lights, then all the lights. Cooling fans slowed, flickered, and stopped. Heaters faded into darkness. Lifts stuck. Radio stations choked off, their soothing music silenced.

电流涌到本不该进入的地方，同时也从以往的河道中退去。在城市里，交通指示灯熄灭了，然后是街灯，进而是所有灯光。制冷风扇转速变慢，抖了两下，最终停止。加热器变凉变黑。电梯停运。广播站也纷纷窒息，舒缓动听的音乐再未响起。

Here and there cities make knots in the web but most of the electricity is, as it were, mere musculature, concerned only with crude work. But for fifty years or so people had been giving electricity brains.

一座座城市在网中形成枢纽，但大多数电子系统只是肌肉组织，仅能起到粗疏浅陋的作用。可是大约五十年前，人们给它制造出了大脑。

Night was spreading slowly around the spinning Earth. It should have been full of pinpricks of light. It was not.

夜色在旋转的地球上渐渐蔓延。它本该充满星星点点的光芒。但现在却没有。

Death straightened up. He appeared to be listening intently. It was anyone’s guess what he listened with.

死神直起身。他似乎在静心聆听。所有人都想知道他在听什么。

There were five billion people down there. What was going to happen soon would make barbarism look like a picnic — hot, nasty, and eventually given over to the ants.

这颗星球上居住着五十亿人。跟即将发生的事情相比，野蛮不过是小菜一碟——热乎、难闻，最终只能留给蚂蚁的小菜一碟。

It has been said that civilization is twenty-four hours and two meals away from barbarism.

有人说文明和野蛮之间的距离，只有二十四小时外加两顿饭。

HE IS HERE, he said.

他来了，死神说。

The other three looked up. There was a barely perceptible change in the way they stood there. A moment before Death had spoken they, the part of them that did not walk and talk like human beings, had been wrapped around the world. Now they were back.

另外三个人抬起头。从他们站在那里的样子，隐约可以看出些变化。在死神开口前，他们三个体内不像人类那样说话行走的部分，包裹住了整个世界。现在他们回来了。

There was a strangeness about them. It was as if, instead of illfitting suits, they now had ill-fitting bodies. Famine looked as though he had been tuned slightly off-station, so that the hitherto dominant signal of a pleasant, thrusting, successful businessman — was beginning to be drowned out by the ancient, horrible static of his basic personality. War’s skin glistened with sweat. Pollution’s skin just glistened.

他们的样子有点奇怪。似乎不是穿了不合体的衣服，而是穿了不合体的身躯。饥荒变化得不太得体，那位讨人喜欢、高傲自信的成功商人过去一直占主导地位，但现在慢慢被古老可怖的本来面目所取代。战争的皮肤上闪着汗珠。污染的皮肤本身就在闪烁。

More or less.

差不多回来了。

“It’s not just the nuclear,” Pollution said. “It’s the chemical. Thousands of gallons of stuff in…, little tanks all over the world. Beautiful liquids… with eighteen syllables in their names. And the… old standbys. Say what you like. Plutonium may give you grief for thousands of years, but arsenic is forever.”

“不光是核战争。”污染说，“还有化学制品。那些小货轮装载着…成千上万加仑制剂…遍布全世界。美丽的液体…名字有十八个字母。还有…老一套的备用品。想要什么都有。钚可以给你数千年的悲剧，但砷可以给你永恒。”

“It’s all… taken care of,” said War, speaking with some effort. “It’ll…, take its course.”

“一切都…处理好了。”战争有些费力地说，“它会…自行发展。”

“Chickens coming… home to roost,” said War.

“这就叫…养虎为患。”战争说。

“And then… winter,” said Famine. “I like winter. There’s something… clean about winter.”

“还有…凛冬。”饥荒说，“我喜欢冬天，有种…洁净的感觉。”

Only Death hadn’t changed. Some things don’t.

只有死神没变。有些东西永远不变。

“No more chickens,” said Famine, flatly.

“再也没有老虎了。”饥荒平淡地说。

And this was noticed by Anathema and Newton Pulsifer.

安娜丝玛和牛顿·帕西法注意到了。

The Four left the building. It was noticeable that Pollution, while still walking, nevertheless gave the impression of oozing.

四骑士往外面走去。污染虽然还在走路，但明显有种缓缓渗漏的感觉。

It had been the first building they’d come to. It had seemed much safer inside than out, where there seemed to be a lot of excitement. Anathema had pushed open a door covered in signs that suggested that this would be a terminally dangerous thing to do. It had swung open at her touch. When they’d gone inside, it had shut and locked itself.

这是他们走入的第一栋建筑。屋子里面似乎安全得多，此刻外面的情况可是相当刺激。安娜丝玛推开一扇门，门上的标志表明这个动作有可能导致死亡。她刚碰了一下，门就打开了。两人走进去后，它又自动关闭锁好。

“I think possibly the end of the world,” said Anathema. “Did you see their auras?”

“我想可能是世界末日。”安娜丝玛说，“你看见他们的气场了吗？”

“Yes.”

“是的。”

There hadn’t been a lot of time to discuss this after the Four had walked in.

接着四骑士走了进来，他俩没多少时间讨论门的问题。

“That’s bad, is it?”

“那很糟，是吗？”

“I don’t think so,” said Newt.

“似乎没有。”牛顿说。

“Negative auras, in fact.”

“实际上，是负面气场。”

Anathema glared at the rows of metal cabinets. For once, just now, because it wasn’t just for play but was for real, the machinery that was going to bring about the end of the world, or at least that part of it that occupied the layers between about two meters down and all the way to the ozone layer, wasn’t operating according to the usual script. There were no big red canisters with flashing lights. There were no coiled wires with a “cut me” look about them. No suspiciously large numeric displays were counting down toward a zero that could be averted with seconds to spare. Instead, the metal cabinets looked solid and heavy and very resistant to last-minute heroism.

安娜丝玛盯着一排排金属柜。只此一次，机械不再按照惯常的程序运转，因为这不是演习而是现实，它们正要毁灭世界，至少是有生命存在的部分，从地下两米一直到臭氧层。这里没有闪闪发亮的红色圆柱形灯盏，没有看起来像是贴着“剪我”标签的红蓝电线，也没有正在倒计时的可疑数字显示屏。你没法在最后几秒逆转进程。这些金属柜沉重结实，对最后关头的英雄主义有很强抗性。

“What were they?” said Newt. “Some kind of terrorists?”

“他们是什么人？”牛顿说，“恐怖分子？”

“Oh?”

“哦？”

“Like black holes.”

“就像黑洞。”

“Not nice at all.”

“不太好。”

“In a very nice and accurate sense,” said Anathema, “I think you’re right.”

“从精良准确的角度来看，”安娜丝玛说，“我想你说得没错。”

“Oh.”

“哦。”

“What was all that weird talk about?”

“他们阴阳怪气地在说些什么？”

“Perhaps there’s an off switch?” said Newt helplessly. “I’m sure if we looked around –“

“也许会有个关闭按钮？”牛顿不抱希望地说，“我敢说如果咱们找找…”

Once, one of the electronics magazines to which he subscribed had published a joke circuit which was guaranteed not to work. At last, they’d said in an amusing way, here’s something all you ham-fisted hams out there can build in the certain knowledge that if it does nothing, it’s working. It had diodes the wrong way round, transistors upside down, and a flat battery. Newt had built it, and it picked up Radio Moscow. He’d written them a letter of complaint, but they never replied.

有一次，他订阅的电学杂志刊登了一则玩笑：一个保证不能工作的电路。在文章最后，他们洋洋得意地说，这玩意儿就连你们这些笨手笨脚的笨瓜都能做得出来，如果它不能工作，那就对了。这个电路中包括插反的二极管、颠倒的晶体管，还有个没电的电池。牛顿做了一个，接收到莫斯科广播电台的信号。他给编辑部写了封信发牢骚，但他们没有回信。

“What takes its course?” said Anathema. “They’ve done something, haven’t they?”

“现在是什么情况？”安娜丝玛说，“他们做了什么，对吗？”

“Worldwide communications,” he said indistinctly. “You could do practically anything. Modulate the mains power, tap into satellites. Absolutely anything. You could”-zhip –“argh, you could”– zhap –“ouch, make things do”– zipt –“uh, just about”– zzap –“ooh.”

“世界范围通信器材。”他闪烁其词地说，“你几乎可以做任何事。控制动力系统，接入卫星。无所不能。你可以。”——滋——“呃，你可以。”——咂——“哎呀，让那些东西。”——噼——“啊，几乎。”——啪——“哦。”

“These sort of things are wired in. Don’t be silly. I thought you knew about this sort of thing.”

“这种东西都是内置的。别傻了。你还以为你了解这些玩意儿呢。”

“How are you getting on in there?”

“你在鼓捣什么呢？”

Newt sucked his fingers. So far he hadn’t found anything that resembled a transistor. He wrapped his hand in his handkerchief and pulled a couple of boards out of their sockets.

牛顿嘬嘬手指。到目前为止，他没发现任何类似晶体管的东西。他用手帕把手包住，将一个电路板从插槽拔了出来。

Newt nodded desperately. This was a long way from the pages of Easy Electronics. For the look of the thing, he peered into the back of one of the cabinets.

牛顿绝望地点点头。这跟《电学常识》里的东西差远了。为了装装样子，他眯起眼睛往一个柜子里看了看。

“Not just unscrews,” said Newt, his temper fraying. “And I’m not”– zhip –“James Bond. If I was’– whizzle –“the bad guys would have shown me all the megadeath levers and told me how they bloody well worked, wouldn’t they?”– Fwizzpt –“Only it doesn’t happen like that in real life? I don’t know what’s happening and I can’t stop it.”

“不光是拧下来。”牛顿越来越压不住火气，“而且我也不是”——滋——“詹姆斯·邦德。如果我是，”——嗖——“那么坏蛋们就会向我展示所有核武器控制杆，告诉我它们有多管用，不是吗？”——嗡——“只可惜现实生活没有这种事，对吗？我不清楚现在的情况，也没法阻止它。”

Clouds churned around the horizon. Overhead the sky was still clear, the air torn by nothing more than a light breeze. But it wasn’t normal air. It had a crystallized look to it, so that you might feel that if you turned your head you might see new facets. It sparkled. If you had to find a word to describe it, the word thronged might slip insidiously into your mind. Thronged with insubstantial beings awaiting only the right moment to become very substantial.

云层在地平线附近翻卷。塔德菲尔德上空依旧晴朗，只有和煦的微风从空中吹过。但空气却不是普通的空气。它有种结晶体的样子，你会觉得如果转过头去，就能看到新的层面。它在发光。如果你想找个词来形容，“群集”这个词可能会不怀好意地钻进你心中。那些没有实体的东西群集这里，只为了等待时机来临，变成非常实在的东西。

“I really don’t know if I’m doing any good,” he said.

“我真不知道这样做有没有用。”他说。

“James Bond just unscrews things,” said Anathema.

“詹姆斯·邦德只需要拧下什么东西。”安娜丝玛说。

Adam glanced up. In one sense there was just clear air overhead. In another, stretching off to infinity, were the hosts of Heaven and Hell, wingtip to wingtip. If you looked really closely, and had been specially trained, you could tell the difference.

亚当抬头望去。一方面来说，上面只有晴朗的天空。但从另一方面来说，那延伸到无限远处的东西，是天堂和地狱的大军正摩肩接踵，或者说摩翼接踵地等待着。如果你看得特别仔细，又受过专业训练，就能分辨出两方的区别。

Silence held the bubble of the world in its grip.

寂静将世界这个气泡握在掌中。

“The thing is,” said Adam urgently, “they’re not really real. They’re just like nightmares, really.”

“关键是，”亚当急迫地说，“他们并不真实，就像噩梦，真的。”

“B-but we’re not asleep,” said Pepper.

“但…但咱们又没睡觉。”佩帕说。

“There you are, then,” said Adam, encouragingly. “It can’t be real, can it? It’s common sense. Something like that can’t be reelly real.”

“就是说啊。”亚当鼓励道，“它不可能是真的，对吧？这是常识。像这种东西不可能真是真的。”

“That one looks as if he’s meltin’,” said Brian, pointing at the advancing figure, if such it could still be called, of Pollution.

“那个人似乎在融化。”布赖恩说。他伸手指向一个前进中的人形——如果它还配得上这个称呼。那是污染。

The door of the building swung open and the Four stepped out. There was no more than a hint of human about three of them now — they seemed to be humanoid shapes made up of all the things they were or represented. They made Death seem positively homely. His leather greatcoat and dark-visored helmet had become a cowled robe, but these were mere details. A skeleton, even a walking one, is at least human; Death of a sort lurks inside every living creature.

房门打开，四骑士走了出来。其中三个几乎没了人样，更像是由他们的本体或是象征物组成的人形物体。与其相比，死神倒显得更加亲切。他的皮大衣和黑头盔变成了带兜帽的长袍，但这只是细枝末节。一具骷髅，哪怕是会走路的骷髅，至少也算有点人样，那正是潜伏在所有生灵体内的死亡。

IT HAS BEEN DONE, said Death. He leaned forward a little and stared eyelessly at Adam. It was hard to tell if he was surprised.

已经办妥了，死神说。他略微欠了欠身，用眼眶盯着亚当。很难说他是否感到惊讶。

The Four halted a few meters away.

四骑士在几米外停住脚步。

Dog whined and tried to hide behind Adam.

狗狗哀叫两声，缩到亚当身后。

I DO NOT UNDERSTAND, he said. SURELY YOUR VERY EXISTENCE REQUIRES THE ENDING OF THE WORLD. IT IS WRITTEN.

我不明白，死神说，你的存在本身就是世界末日的征兆。这写得明明白白。

“Yes, well,” said Adam. “The thing is, I don’t want it done. I never asked for it to be done.”

“哦，好的。”亚当说，“问题是，我不想把它办妥。我没让你们把它办妥。”

Death looked at the other three, and then back to Adam.

死神看了看其他三人，又转回头看着亚当。

“I dunt see why anyone has to go an’ write things like that,” said Adam calmly. “The world is full of all sorts of brilliant stuff and I haven’t found out all about it yet, so I don’t want anyone messing it about or endin’ it before I’ve had a chance to find out about it. So you can all just go away.”

“我不明白为什么有人写这种话。”亚当平静地说，“这个世界充满各种有趣的东西，我还没见识过呢。所以在我有机会全都见识过之前，不希望任何人把它弄坏，或是让它完蛋。你们只要躲远点就行了。”

Behind them a jeep skewed to a halt. They ignored it.

一辆吉普车停在他们身后。所有人都没理会。

“You… are part… of us,” said War, between teeth like beautiful bullets.

“你…是我们的…一部分。”战争说。她的牙齿仿佛两排漂亮的子弹。

(“That’s the one, Mr. Shadwell,” said Aziraphale, his words trailing into uncertainty even as he uttered them, “the one with T-shirt…”)

（“就是他，沙德维尔先生。”这句话还没说完，亚茨拉菲尔的语气就掺进了将信将疑的成分，“那个…穿T恤衫的…”）

Death stared at Adam.

死神盯着亚当。

“It is done. We make… the… world… anew,” said Pollution, his voice as insidious as something leaking out of a corroded drum into a water table.

“已经办妥了。我们…让…这个…世界…焕然一新。”污染说。他的声音阴险鬼祟，就像是什么东西正从被腐蚀的铁桶里漏进水面。

“You… lead… us,” said Famine.

“你…带领…我们。”饥荒说。

You just had to decide who your friends really were.

你必须决定谁才是真正的朋友。

Adam looked at the Them. They were his kind of people, too.

亚当看着“他们”。“他们”也是跟他一伙儿的。

(“Ye canna want me to shoot him! He’s but a bairn!”

（“你不能让我向他开枪！他只是个孩子！”

In tiers above, the hosts of the sky waited for the Word.

在九天之上，两方军队等待着那个字眼儿。

Dog began to growl.

狗狗开始吠叫。

And Adam hesitated. Voices inside him still cried out that this was true, and that the world was his as well, and all he had to do was turn and lead them out across a bewildered planet. They were his kind of people.

亚当犹豫了。他体内有个声音正在叫喊说这是真的，世界属于他一个人，他所要做的就是转过身，带领他们穿越狂乱的星球。他们是跟他一伙儿的。

“Er,” said Aziraphale. “Er. Yes. Perhaps we’d just better wait a bit, what do you think?”

“呃。”亚茨拉菲尔说，“呃。是的。也许咱们最好再等等，你们说呢？”

“Until he grows up, do you mean?” said Crowley.)

“你是说，等他长大？”克鲁利说。）

He turned back to the Four.

亚当转回身，看着四骑士。

“Get them,” said Adam, quietly.

“干掉他们。”亚当平静地说。

The slouch and slur was gone from his voice. It had strange harmonics. No one human could disobey a voice like that.

他的语气中完全没了懒散含混的感觉，反而有种奇妙的和谐。谁都不能违抗这种声音。

War laughed, and looked expectantly at the Them.

战争笑起来，期待地看着孩子们。

“Little boys,” she said, “playing with your toys. Think of all the toys I can offer you… think of all the games. I can make you fall in love with me, little boys. Little boys with your little guns.”

“可怜的小男孩们，”她说，“只能玩你们的小玩具。想想我能给你们什么玩具…想想所有游戏。我能让你们爱上我，小男孩们。带着小枪的小男孩。”

The air between Adam and Death began to vibrate, as in a heatwave.

亚当和死神之间的空气开始颤动，仿佛处在滚滚热浪之中。

Wensleydale raised his head and looked Famine in the sunken eye. He held up something that, with a bit of imagination, could be considered to be a pair of scales made of more string and twigs. Then he whirled it around his head.

温斯利戴仰起头，看着饥荒凹陷的眼睛。他举起一个东西，如果有点想象力，你可以把它看成是用细线和树枝做成的天平。温斯利戴拿着天平，在脑袋周围转了一圈。

“But, but,” said Brian, “she sort of got sucked up the sword –“

“但、但是，”布赖恩说，“她似乎被那把剑吸进去了…”

“‘Little boys,'” muttered Pepper, disgustedly. Sooner or later everyone has to decide which gang they belong to.

“小男孩。”佩帕厌恶地嘟囔道。每个人都要决定自己属于哪一派，早晚的事。

The Them stared at the sword rocking to a standstill on the concrete path.

“他们”看着利剑在混凝土走廊上翻滚，最终停了下来。

There was a flash as they connected.

它们接触时，迸出一道闪光。

“Don’t touch it!” snapped Adam, without moving his head.

“别碰它！”亚当吼道，但他没有转头。

It wasn’t much of a sword, but it was about the best you could do with two bits of wood and a piece of string. War stared at it.

它不太像剑，但这是你用两片木头和一根细线所能达到的最佳效果。战争盯着它。

There was a pathetic jingling noise.

一阵凄凉的叮当声响起。

Death stared into Adam’s eyes.

死神盯着亚当的眼睛。

“I see,” she said. “Mano a mano, eh?” She drew her own blade and brought it up so that it made a noise like a finger being dragged around a wineglass.

“我明白了。”她说，“单挑，是吗？”她抽出自己的利剑，高高举起，让它发出一阵蜂鸣，仿佛用手指抹过酒杯的声音。

She laughed again, but the machine-gun stutter died away as Pepper stepped forward and raised a trembling arm.

她又放声大笑。佩帕走上前来，颤颤巍巍地抬起胳膊，那机关枪似的笑声渐渐消失。

He grinned at Adam.

他冲亚当露齿一笑。

With a rolling, tinny little sound a blackened silver crown bowled out of the smoke and then spun round with a noise like a settling penny.

细小的翻滚声响起，一个发黑的银冠从烟雾中滚了出来，在地上转了几圈，声音仿佛慢慢落定的硬币。

This time the explosion was a red flame inside a billow of black smoke, and it smelled of oil.

这次的爆炸是一团黑烟中冒出的红色火焰，闻起来有股汽油味。

There was a tearing sound. Death’s robe split and his wings unfolded. Angel’s wings. But not of feathers. They were wings of night, wings that were shapes cut through the matter of creation into the darkness underneath, in which a few distant lights glimmered, lights that may have been stars or may have been something entirely else.

随着一阵撕裂声，死神的长袍支离破碎，他的翅膀伸展开来。天使的翅膀。但没有羽毛。这是黑夜的翅膀，形态足以刺穿生灵的实体，进入下方黑暗。几点微光在这对翅膀上闪烁，可能是遥远的星辰，也可能是截然不同的东西。

There was another flash, and then the jingle of a pair of silver scales bouncing on the ground.

又是一道闪光，然后是一具银天平掉在地上的叮当声。

WHERE THEY BELONG, said Death, still holding Adam’s gaze. WHERE THEY HAVE ALWAYS BEEN. BACK IN THE MINDS OF MAN.

他们该在的地方，死神始终盯着亚当的眼睛，一直都在的地方。他们回到了人们心中。

Pollution had already started to run, or at least to flow quickly, but Brian snatched the circle of grass stalks from his own head and flung it. It shouldn’t have handled like one, but a force took it out of his hands and it whirred like a discus.

污染已然准备逃跑，或者说是快速流动，但布赖恩从头上抓起草茎编成的头环，向前扔去。它本不该这样用，但一股大力把它从布赖恩手中拿走，让它像铁饼一样向前飞去。

“Don’t… touch… them,” said Adam.

“别…碰…它们。”亚当说。

At least they needed no warning about touching it. It glistened in a way that metal should not.

至少这次不需要警告他们不要碰。银冠放射出金属不该具有的光泽。

“Where’d they go?” said Wensley.

“他们去哪儿了？”温斯利戴问。

Famine stuck out a protective arm.

饥荒伸出胳膊，似乎想要保护自己。

THEY’LL BE BACK, he said. THEY’RE NEVER FAR AWAY.

但他们会回来的，他说，他们从来不会远去。

“You’d think there’d be a manual or something,” he said.

“这里应该有个手册什么的。”他说。

“Anyway, it’s going to stop now,” he said. “All this stuff with the machines. You’ve got to do what I say just for now, and I say it’s got to stop.”

“总之，应该停止了，”他说，“所有那些跟机器有关的勾当。你必须按我说的做，我说要让它停止。”

“We could see if Agnes has anything to say,” volunteered Anathema.

“咱们可以看看艾格尼丝有什么要说的。”安娜丝玛提议道。

The heat of their stare faded. Adam scratched his nose.

他们目光中的热度渐渐退去。亚当挠挠鼻子。

The wings flapped, just once, like a thunderclap, and the angel of Death vanished.

翅膀扑扇一下，声如霹雳惊雷，死亡天使没了踪影。

Death shrugged. IT IS STOPPING ALREADY, he said. WITHOUT THEM, he indicated the pathetic remnants of the other three Horsepersons, IT CANNOT PROCEED. NORMAL ENTROPY TRIUMPHS. Death raised a bony hand in what might have been a salute.

死神耸耸肩。已然停止了，他说，没有他们，他指了指三骑士可怜的遗骸，它无法继续。常态熵获得了胜利。死神抬起一只瘦骨嶙峋的手，似乎是在敬礼。

“Oh, I don’t know,” he said. “There might be a way.” He grinned back.

“哦，我不知道。”他说，“可能会有个法子。”他也露出笑容。

“Right, then,” said Adam, to the empty air. “All right. It’s not going to happen. All the stuff they started — it must stop now.”

“那好吧。”亚当冲着空气说，“好吧。就到此为止了。所有他们启动的东西，必须马上停止。”

Newt stared desperately at the equipment racks.

牛顿绝望地盯着仪器架。

BUT I, he said, AM NOT LIKE THEM. I AM AZRAEL, CREATED TO BE CREATION’S SHADOW. YOU CANNOT DESTROY ME. THAT WOULD DESTROY THE WORLD.

但是我，他说，跟他们不一样。我是死神，永远是生灵的影子。你不能摧毁我。那将摧毁整个世界。

“Oh, yes,” said Newt bitterly. “That makes sense, does it? Sabotaging twentieth-century electronics with the aid of a seventeenth-century workshop manual? What did Agnes Nutter know of the transistor?”

“哦，对啊。”牛顿讽刺说，“有道理，不是吗？在十七世纪工房手册的帮助下，破坏二十世纪电子装置？艾格尼丝·风子知道什么是晶体管吗？”

Newt groaned.

牛顿呻吟一声。

“I was speaking rhetorically.”

“我只是打个比方。”

“You don’t have to make it work, anyway. You have to stop it working. You don’t need knowledge for that, you need ignorance.”

“反正你也用不着让它正常工作。你要让它停止工作。你不需要知识，需要的是无知。”

“‘He is Not that Which He Says he Is,”‘ she read. “It’s number 1002. Very simple. Any ideas?”

“他不是他所说的那种人。”她读道，“第1002条。很简单。有什么思路吗？”

Anathema pulled out a card at random.

安娜丝玛随手抽出一张卡片。

“Well, look,” said Newt, wretchedly, “this isn’t really the time to say it but,”– he swallowed –“actually I’m not very good with electronics. Not very good at all.”

“哦，你看。”牛顿可怜兮兮地说，“现在不是说这个的时候，但是，”他咽了口唾沫，“实际上我对电子仪器不太在行。并不特别精通。”

“Well, my grandfather interpreted prediction 3328 rather neatly in 1948 and made some very shrewd investments,” said Anathema. “She didn’t know what it was going to be called, of course, and she wasn’t very sound about electricity in general, but –“

“哦，我祖父在1948年很准确地解读出第3328则预言，并据此做出了非常明智的投资。”安娜丝玛说，“当然，她不知道这东西叫什么。但总的来说，艾格尼丝对电子装置还是相当了解的，但…”

“All right,” he said wearily. “Let’s try it. Give me a prediction.”

“好吧。”他倦怠地说，“那咱们就试试看。给我一条预言。”

“You said you were a computer engineer, I seem to remember.”

“我似乎记得，你自称是电脑工程师。”

“Oh, I wouldn’t go that far,” said Newt. “Although,” he added, “I’m not actually a computer engineer. At all. Quite the opposite.”

“哦，我不会那么过分的。”牛顿说，“但是，”他补充道，“我并不是电脑工程师。根本不是。恰恰相反。”

“That was an exaggeration. I mean, just about as much of an exaggeration as you can possibly get, in fact, really, I suppose it was more what you might call an an overstatement. I might go so far as to say that what it really was,” Newt closed his eyes, “was a prevarication.”

“这是一种夸张。我是说，比你想象中的夸张还要再夸张一些。实际上，我估计这已经不能称之为说大话。我也许应该斗胆称之为，”牛顿闭上眼睛，“一种搪塞。”

“I don’t know,” said Newt. “I’m not sure I can.” He laid a hand on top of the nearest cabinet.

“我不知道。”牛顿说，“我不敢说能否做到这一点。”他把手放在最近的铁柜上。

“Make it work better,” she said.

“把它改造得更好。”她说。

“If you must know, every time I try and make anything electronic work, it stops.”

“如果你非要知道的话。这么说吧，我每次试图让任何电子仪器工作时，它都会关闭。”

Anathema gave him a bright little smile, and posed theatrically, like that moment in every conjurer’s stage act when the lady in the sequins steps back to reveal the trick.

安娜丝玛冲他露出灿烂的微笑，摆出戏剧化的姿势；就跟每场魔法演出中，穿闪亮金属片紧身衣的女士走回台上揭露戏法奥秘时一样。

“A lie, you mean?” said Anathema sweetly.

“你是说谎言？”安娜丝玛甜甜地说。

“Repair it,” she said.

“修好它。”她说。

“Tra-la,” she said.

“哦耶。”她说。

“What?”

“什么？”

There was the noise of something he hadn’t realized he’d been hearing suddenly stopping, and the descending whine of a distant generator. The lights on the panels flickered, and most of them went out.

某种他始终没有留意的噪音突然停止，远处的发电机传来一阵渐渐消逝的哀鸣。仪表板上的小灯泡闪了几下，大多数就此熄灭。

“What’s the opposite?”

“什么叫相反？”

In Tadfield, the machines ceased radiating menace. Something that had been in them was gone, quite apart from the electricity.

在塔德菲尔德，一排排机械不再散发出危险气氛。它们内部有些东西消失了，同样消失的还有电流。

The lights came on. Civilization stopped its slide into chaos, and started writing letters to the newspapers about how people got overexcited about the least little thing these days.

灯光亮起。文明停止了通向混沌的滑行，随即开始给报纸写信，声称人们对这些芝麻小事反应过激。

“Gosh,” said Newt.

“天哪。”牛顿说。

“He didn’t want to do it!” said Aziraphale. “Haven’t I always told you, Crowley? If you take the trouble to look, deep down inside anyone, you’ll find that at bottom they’re really quite –“

“他不想干！”亚茨拉菲尔说，“我不是老这么跟你说吗，克鲁利？如果你肯受累看一眼任何人的内心，就会发现他们本质上非常…”

All over the world, people who had been wrestling with switches found that they switched. Circuit breakers opened. Computers stopped planning World War III and went back to idly scanning the stratosphere. In bunkers under Novya Zemla men found that the fuses they were frantically trying to pull out came away in their hands at last; in bunkers under Wyoming and Nebraska, men in fatigues stopped screaming and waving guns at one another, and would have had a beer if alcohol had been allowed in missile bases. It wasn’t, but they had one anyway.

世界各地正在跟开关斗争的人们发现它们可以正常开关了。断流器随即敞开。电脑们停止计划第三次世界大战，重新懒洋洋地扫描起同温层。在俄罗斯北方新地岛的地下掩体中，发疯似的试图拔出保险丝的人们，发现保险丝终于落入自己手中。在怀俄明和内布拉斯加的地下掩体中，疲惫的人们不再互相叫嚣，或是挥舞枪支，如果导弹基地里允许喝酒精饮料的话，他们肯定要来一罐啤酒。这显然是不允许的，但他们还是喝了。

“There you are,” said Anathema. “You fixed it good. You can trust old Agnes, take it from me. Now let’s get out of here.”

“成了。”安娜丝玛说，“你把它修好了。听我的没错，你可以信赖老艾格尼丝。现在咱们还是离开这里吧。”

“It’s not over,” said Crowley flatly.

“还没完。”克鲁利平静地说。

Adam turned and appeared to notice them for the first time. Crowley was not used to people identifying him so readily, but Adam stared at him as though Crowley’s entire life history was pasted inside the back of his skull and he, Adam, was reading it. For an instant he knew real terror. He’d always thought the sort he’d felt before was the genuine article, but that was mere abject fear beside this new sensation. Those Below could make you cease to exist by, well, hurting you in unbearable amounts, but this boy could not only make you cease to exist merely by thinking about it, but probably could arrange matters so that you never had existed at all.

亚当转过身，头一次注意到他们。克鲁利还不习惯有人这么轻易就把他认了出来，但亚当正看着他，仿佛克鲁利一辈子的经历都在脑海深处重演，而亚当正在观看。这一瞬间，克鲁利明白了什么是真正的恐惧。他本以为自己过去体会到的那种，就是货真价实的东西。但跟这次的全新体验相比，它们只是最肤浅的担心而已。下界的家伙们可以通过对你施加难以忍受的痛苦，来抹掉你的存在。但这个男孩不仅动个念头就能抹去你的存在，而且多半可以让你从来不曾存在过。

Adam’s gaze swept to Aziraphale.

亚当的目光转向亚茨拉菲尔。

“‘Scuse me, why’re you two people?” said Adam.

“抱歉，你为什么是两个人？”亚当说。

There were no showy special effects. There was just Aziraphale, sitting next to Madame Tracy.

并没有华丽的视觉效果。只是亚茨拉菲尔突然坐在了特蕾西夫人身边。

“Well,” said Aziraphale, “it’s a long –“

“哦，”亚茨拉菲尔说，“这是个很长…”

“It’s not right, being two people,” said Adam. “I reckon you’d better go back to being two sep’rate people.”

“同时当两个人，这样不对。”亚当说，“我想你最好还是做两个不同的人。”

“Ooh, that felt tingly,” she said. She looked Aziraphale up and down. “Oh,” she said, in a slightly disappointed voice. “Somehow, I thought you’d be younger.”

“哦，感觉怪痒痒的。”特蕾西夫人说完，上上下下打量了亚茨拉菲尔一番。“哦，”她略显失望地说，“不知为什么，我以为你会更年轻些。”

Shadwell glowered jealously at the angel and thumbed the Thundergun’s hammer in a pointed sort of way.

沙德维尔嫉妒地瞪着天使，以某种特别的方式拨弄着雷电枪的击铁。

Aziraphale looked down at his new body which was, unfortunately, very much like his old body, although the overcoat was cleaner.

亚茨拉菲尔低头看着自己的新身躯，不幸的是，它跟过去区别不大，只是外衣干净了些。

“Well, that’s over,” he said.

“好了，一切都过去了。”天使说。

Now there were clouds overhead, curling like a pot of tagliatelli on full boil.

云层聚集在他们头顶，像一锅到达沸点的宽面条似的风起云涌。

“You see,” said Crowley, his voice leaden with fatalistic gloom, “it doesn’t really work that simply. You think wars get started because some old duke gets shot, or someone cuts off someone’s ear, or someone’s sited their missiles in the wrong place. It’s not like that. That’s just, well, just reasons, which haven’t got anything to do with it. What really causes wars is two sides that can’t stand the sight of one another and the pressure builds up and up and then anything will cause it. Anything at all. What’s your name… er… boy?”

“你看，”克鲁利的语气中有种宿命论般的沉痛感，“这件事根本没这么简单。你以为战争打响，是因为某些老公爵被枪杀，或是某人割下了某人的耳朵，或是某些人把他们的导弹部署在错误的地点。其实不是这么回事。这些只是，哦，借口罢了，对战争没有多大影响。战争真正的成因，是两方再也不能忍受对方的存在，压力逐渐积聚，最终任何事都会让它爆发。任何事。你叫什么名字，呃…孩子？”

“No,” said Crowley. “No. It isn’t, you see. Not at all.”

“不。”克鲁利说，“不。你知道，还没有。根本没结束。”

“Well. In the Beginning –“

“好吧。一开始…”

“Good effort. You’ve saved the world. Have a half-holiday,” said Crowley. “But it won’t really make any difference.”

“干得好。你拯救了世界。放半天假吧。”克鲁利说，“但其实没什么差别。”

“Him who?” said Crowley.

“他是谁？”克鲁利说。

The Them stared.

“他们”盯着那人。

The lightning vanished, and a young man made out of golden fire stood there.

电光消失了，一个由金光塑成的年轻人站在那里。

“The Voice of God,” said the angel. “The Metatron.”

“上帝之声。”天使说，“梅塔特隆。”

“That’s right. Adam Young,” said Adam.

“没错，亚当·扬。”亚当说。

Then Pepper said, “No, it isn’t. The Metatron’s made of plastic and it’s got laser cannon and it can turn into a helicopter.”

佩帕说：“不，不是。梅塔特隆是塑料做的，而且有激光枪，还能变成直升机。”

Anathema stuck out her chin. “Go on, then,” she said.

安娜丝玛仰起头。“那就快说吧。”她说。

“Oh dear,” said Aziraphale. “It’s him.”

“哦，天哪。”亚茨拉菲尔说，“是他。”

Aziraphale shrugged. “It’s a very long story,” he began.

亚茨拉菲尔耸耸肩。“这是个很长的故事。”他说。

“I think you’re right,” said Aziraphale. “I’m sure my people want Armageddon. It’s very sad.”

“我想你说得对。”亚茨拉菲尔说，“我敢肯定我们这边需要世界末日大决战。这真可悲。”

The lightning flashed, struck the ground a few meters from Adam, and stayed there, a sizzling column that broadened at the base, as though the wild electricity was filling an invisible mold. The humans pressed back against the jeep.

电光一闪，打在距离亚当几米外的地面上，并且定在那里。一道嘶嘶作响的光柱底部开始扩大，仿佛不受约束的电流正在注入一个透明模子。在场的几个人类纷纷后退，靠在吉普车上。

“Would anyone mind telling us what’s going on?” said Anathema sternly, folding her arms.

“谁能告诉我出了什么事？”安娜丝玛抱着胳膊严肃地说。

“That’s Adam Young,” said Anathema, as she strode up with Newt trailing after her.

“他是亚当·扬。”安娜丝玛说。她大步走出房门，身后跟着牛顿·帕西法。

“That’s the Cosmic Megatron,” said Wensleydale weakly. “I had one, but the head fell off. I think this one is different.”

“那是威震天。”温斯利戴有气无力地说，“我有一个，但脑袋掉了。我想这个肯定不一样。”

The beautiful blank gaze fell on Adam Young, and then turned sharply to look at the concrete beside it, which was boiling.

那毫无表情的美丽目光落在亚当·扬身上，接着又猛然转向身边的混凝土地面。那里正在沸腾。

A figure rose from the churning ground in the manner of the demon king in a pantomime, but if this one was ever in a pantomime, it was one where no one walked out alive and they had to get a priest to burn the place down afterwards. It was not greatly different to the other figure, except that its flames were blood-red.

一个人影从翻滚的地表慢慢升起，姿态就像舞剧中的恶魔君王。但如果这是一出舞剧，那么观众都不可能活着走出去，而且事后还得找个牧师来把这地方烧个一干二净。他跟梅塔特隆没多大区别，不过火光是血红色的。

It was talking to Adam, who said, “Huh? No. I said already. My name’s Adam Young.” He looked the figure up and down. “What’s yours?”

他在对亚当讲话。男孩说：“哈？不。我说过了。我叫亚当·扬。”他打量着此人，“你是什么东西？”

“Er,” said Crowley, trying to shrink into his seat. “Hi… er.”

“呃。”克鲁利说着试图缩进座椅，“嗨…呃。”

It buzzed a word that felt, to those humans who heard it, like a file dragged down the spine.

对在场的人类来说，他每吐出一个字眼，就像一把锉刀顺着脊椎往下蹭。

The red thing gave him the briefest of glances, as though marking him for future consumption, and then stared at Adam. When it spoke, its voice was like a million flies taking off in a hurry.

红色的人形瞥了他一眼，似乎准备日后再做处理。他的目光随即转向亚当，开口说话。这声音犹如上百万只苍蝇同时起飞。

“Er,” said Crowley, “well, you see, what happened was –“

“呃。”克鲁利说，“好的，您看，最近发生的…”

“Beelzebub,” Crowley supplied. “He’s the Lord of –“

“别西卜。”克鲁利说，“他是蝇王…”

“Right. Right,” said Crowley hurriedly.

“好的，好的。”克鲁利忙不迭说。

“Silenzz!”

“闭嘴嗡！”

“Thank you, Crowzley,” said Beelzebub. “Later we muzzed have a seriouzz talk. I am sure thou hazzt muzzch to tell me.”

“谢谢嗡，克鲁利。”别西卜说，“咱们待会儿嗡必须好好谈谈。我肯定嗡你有很多话要对我嗡说。”

“Now then, Adam Young,” said the Metatron, “while we can of course appreciate your assistance at this point, we must add that Armageddon should take place now. There may be some temporary inconvenience, but that should hardly stand in the way of the ultimate good.”

“好了，亚当·扬。”梅塔特隆说，“我们当然很欣赏你在这个问题上的协助，但我们必须坚持让末日之战马上开始。也许会有些暂时的不便，但和最终的善果相比，这算不了什么。”

“Azz to what it standz in the way of, that hazz yet to be decided,” buzzed Beelzebub. “But it muzzt be decided now, boy. That izz thy deztiny. It is written.”

“最终嗡结果如何，现在还很难说嗡。”别西卜嗡嗡道，“但必须马上嗡做出这个决断嗡，孩子。这是嗡命运。它早已写明。”

“Ah,” whispered Crowley to Aziraphale, “what he means is, we have to destroy the world in order to save it.”

“啊。”克鲁利对亚茨拉菲尔耳语道，“他的意思是说，我们必须摧毁这个世界，好拯救它。”

“I just don’t see why everyone and everything has to be burned up and everything,” Adam said. “Millions of fish an’ whales an’ trees an’, an’ sheep and stuff. An’ not even for anything important. Jus’ to see who’s got the best gang. It’s like us an’ the Johnsonites. But even if you win, you can’t really beat the other side, because you don’t really want to. I mean, not for good. You’ll just start all over again. You’ll just keep on sending people like these two,” he pointed to Crowley and Aziraphale, “to mess people around. It’s hard enough bein’ people as it is, without other people coming and messin’ you around.”

“我只是不明白为什么要把所有人、所有东西都烧干净什么的。”亚当说，“数百万条鱼还有鲸还有树还有、还有羊之类的。而且也不是为了什么正经事。只是想知道谁是最棒的一派。这就像我们和约翰逊派。但就算你赢了，也不可能彻底击败对方，因为你不想这么干。我是说，不想彻底打败对方。你们会从头再来。你们会继续派他们这种人，”他指了指克鲁利和亚茨拉菲尔，“来给人们捣乱。就算没有其他人跑来捣乱，想当个人就已经够难的了。”

Adam took a deep breath. The human watchers held theirs. Crowley and Aziraphale had forgotten to breathe some time ago.

亚当深吸口气。在场的人类都屏住呼吸。克鲁利和亚茨拉菲尔不知从何时起，已经忘了呼吸这码事。

“Johnsonites?” he whispered.

“约翰逊派？”他轻声说。

Crowley turned to Aziraphale.

克鲁利转头看了看亚茨拉菲尔。

“People bein’ messed around,” murmured Crowley.

“人们一直在瞎搞。”克鲁利嘟囔道。

The angel shrugged. “Early breakaway sect, I think,” he said. “Sort of Gnostics. Like the Ophites.” His forehead wrinkled. “Or were they the Sethites? No, I’m thinking of the Collyridians. Oh dear. I’m sorry, there were hundreds of them, it’s so hard to keep track.”

天使耸耸肩。“我想是早期分离教派之一。”他说，“有点像诺斯替派。或者俄斐特派。”他皱了皱眉，“也可能是塞特派？不，我想大概是柯里瑞底派。哦，上帝啊。抱歉，肯定有上百个教派，太难分清了。”

“It doesn’t matter!” snapped the Metatron. “The whole point of the creation of the Earth and Good and Evil –“

“那无关紧要！”梅塔特隆吼道，“造物的关键，还有善恶的要旨…”

“I don’t see what’s so triflic about creating people as people and then gettin’ upset ‘cos they act like people,” said Adam severely. “Anyway, if you stopped tellin’ people it’s all sorted out after they’re dead, they might try sorting it all out while they’re alive. If I was in charge, I’d try makin’ people live a lot longer, like ole Methuselah. It’d be a lot more interestin’ and they might start thinkin’ about the sort of things they’re doing to all the enviroment and ecology, because they’ll still be around in a hundred years’ time.”

“把人创造成人，又因为他们举止像人而不满，我不明白这算怎么回事。”亚当严苛地说，“更何况，如果你们别再跟人们说，一切都会在他们死后走上正轨，也许他们就会在活着的时候让世界走上正轨。如果是我管事，就会让人类的寿命更长些，像《圣经》里的老马士撒拉那样，活个九百多岁。这样肯定更有意思，而且他们没准儿会开始考虑自己的所作所为对环境和生态的影响，因为过一百多年，他们还会活在这个世界上。”

“I thought about all that an’ I don’t want to,” said Adam, half turning and nodding encouragingly at the Them. “I mean, there’s some stuff could do with alt’rin’, but then I expect peopled keep comin’ up to me and gettin’ me to sort out everythin’ the whole time and get rid of all the rubbish and make more trees for ’em, and where’s the good in all that? It’s like havin’ to tidy up people’s bedrooms for them.”

“我全都考虑过了，但我不想那么做。”亚当说着半转过身，冲“他们”会意地点点头，“我是说，我确实可以改变世界什么的，但接下来每时每刻都会有人来找我，让我处理各种事情，清理所有垃圾，为他们造更多树，这有什么好处？这就像必须替所有人整理卧室。”

“Ah,” said Beelzebub, and he actually began to smile. “You wizzsh to rule the world. That’z more like thy Fath –“

“啊。”别西卜说着露出微笑，“你想嗡统治世界。这就更像你父…”

Beelzebub and the Metatron looked at one another.

别西卜和梅塔特隆对视一眼。

“You never tidy up even your bedroom,” said Pepper, behind him.

“你从来没整理过自己的卧室。”站在他身后的佩帕说。

“I never said anythin’ about my bedroom,” said Adam, referring to a room whose carpet had been lost to view for several years. “It’s general bedrooms I mean. I dint mean my personal bedroom. It’s an analoggy. That’s jus’ what I’m sayin’.”

“我又没说是自己的卧室。”亚当说。他卧室里的地毯已经好几年不见天日了。“我说的是普遍意义上的卧室，没说是我自己的。只是打个比方。我就是这个意思。”

“Anyway,” said Adam, “it’s bad enough having to think of things for Pepper and Wensley and Brian to do all the time so they don’t get bored, so I don’t want any more world than I’ve got. Thank you all the same.”

“总之。”亚当说，“替佩帕、温斯利和布赖恩想有趣的事情做，好让他们不至于无聊，就够我忙的了。我不需要更多的世界。不过还是谢谢了。”

Adam hesitated.

亚当犹豫了。

“You can’t refuse to be who you are,” it said eventually. “Listen. Your birth and destiny are part of the Great Plan. Things have to happen like this. All the choices have been made.”

“你不能拒绝做你自己。”他最终说，“听着，你的出生和命运都是大计划的一部分。事态必须这样发展。所有抉择必须做出。”

“Rebellion izz a fine thing,” said Beelzebub, “but some thingz are beyond rebellion. You muzzt understand!”

“反叛是好事。”别西卜说，“但有些事在反叛之上。你必须明白！”

“This makes no sense,” said the Metatron. “You can’t run counter to the Great Plan. You must think. It’s in your genes. Think.”

“真是荒唐。”梅塔特隆说，“你不能违背大计划。你必须想。它固化在你的基因里。想。”

“I’m not rebelling against anything,” said Adam in a reasonable tone of voice. “I’m pointin’ out things. Seems to me you can’t blame people for pointin’ out things. Seems to me it’d be a lot better not to start fightin’ and jus’ see what people do. If you stop messin’ them about they might start thinkin’ properly an’ they might stop messin’ the world around. I’m not sayin’ they would,” he added conscientiously, “but they might.”

“我没反叛任何东西。”亚当通情达理地说，“我只是指出一些问题。在我看来，你不能因为别人指出一些问题就责怪他们。在我看来，最好不要打架，看看人们会怎么做。如果你们不再捣乱，没准儿他们也会认真思考，不再给这个世界捣乱。我没说他们肯定会这么做，”亚当本着良心补充道，“但有这个可能。”

The dark undercurrent was always ready to flow back, its reedy whisper saying yes, that was it, that was what it was all about, you have to follow the Plan because you were part of it —

黑暗逆流时刻准备着卷土重来，它用尖细的声音说着，对，就是这样，一切都是为了这个目的，你必须遵循计划，因为你是它的一部分…

The Metatron’s face began to take on the look familiar to all those subjected to Adam’s idiosyncratic line of reasoning.

梅塔特隆脸上的表情，就跟所有遭遇亚当独特思维逻辑的人相差无几。

The trio looked at him.

那三个人看着他。

It had been a long day. He was tired. Saving the world took it out of an eleven-year-old body.

这是漫长的一天。亚当累了，拯救世界让这具十一岁的身体感觉精疲力竭。

He was aware that Aziraphale had stood up.

他意识到亚茨拉菲尔站了起来。

“It doesn’t matter!” snapped the Metatron. “It’s the same thing, surely!”

“这无关紧要。”梅塔特隆喝道，“都是一回事，肯定是！”

“It’s the Great Plan,” said the Metatron flatly. “You are well aware. There shall be a world lasting six thousand years and it will conclude with –“

“它是大计划。”梅塔特隆冷冷地说，“你很清楚。计划中有个会持续六千年的世界，然后它会终结…”

There was a moment’s silence.

没人搭腔。

“This Great Plan,” he said, “this would be the ineffable Plan, would it?”

“这个大计划。”他说，“应该就是那个不可言说的计划，对吧？”

Crowley stuck his head in his hands. “For a moment there, just for a moment, I thought we had a chance,” he said. “He had them worried. Oh, well, it was nice while –“

克鲁利把头埋在手里。“有那么一会儿，只是一会儿，我还以为咱们有机会成功。”他说，“亚当让他们感到困惑。哦，是的，这很好…”

“Yes, yes, that’s the Great Plan all right,” said Aziraphale. He spoke politely and respectfully, but with the air of one who has just asked an unwelcome question at a political meeting and won’t go away until he gets an answer. “I was just asking if it’s ineffable as well. I just want to be clear on this point.”

“对，对，这是大计划没错。”亚茨拉菲尔说。他的语气礼貌恭谨，但却有种执拗的感觉，就像有人在政治会议上提出了一个不受欢迎的问题，而且在得到答复之前，坚决不肯离去。“我只是问问，它是不是不可言喻的。我只想弄清这一点。”

“Excuse me,” said the angel.

“抱歉。”天使说。

Surely? thought Crowley. They don’t actually know. He started to grin like an idiot.

肯定是？克鲁利心想。原来他们也不清楚。他咧开嘴，笑得像个傻子。

Then he said: “I don’t see why it matters what is written. Not when it’s about people. It can always be crossed out.”

接着他说：“我不知道写下来的东西有什么了不起，尤其是关系到人时。反正可以把它划掉。”

“In bigger letters,” said Aziraphale.

“用加粗黑体字。”亚茨拉菲尔说。

“It izz written!” bellowed Beelzebub.

“它早就嗡写明白了！”别西卜吼道。

“Whoop-eee,” said Crowley. “Where have you been?”

“哇靠。”克鲁利说，“你没在天堂待过吗？”

“Where you can’t read it.”

“你们读不到的地方。”

“Underlined,” Crowley added.

“加下划线。”克鲁利补充说。

“It’s not given to us to understand the ineffable Plan,” said the Metatron, “but of course the Great Plan –“

“我们没有被赋予理解不可言喻计划的能力。”梅塔特隆说，“但大计划当然…”

“But it might be written differently somewhere else,” said Crowley.

“但也许在别的地方，写着完全不同的内容。”克鲁利说。

“Twice,” suggested Aziraphale.

“两次。”亚茨拉菲尔猜测道。

“Perhaps this isn’t just a test of the world,” said Crowley. “It might be a test of you people, too. Hmm?”

“也许这不只是对世界的考验，”克鲁利说，“也是对你们所有人的考验，嗯？”

“God does not play games with His loyal servants,” said the Metatron, but in a worried tone of voice.

“上帝不会戏弄他忠诚的奴仆。”梅塔特隆焦虑地说。

“So you’re not one hundred percent clear on this?” said Aziraphale.

“那么你们对这个问题，也不敢百分之百肯定？”亚茨拉菲尔说。

“But the Great Plan can only be a tiny part of the overall ineffability,” said Crowley. “You can’t be certain that what’s happening right now isn’t exactly right, from an ineffable point of view.”

“但大计划可能只是整个不可言喻计划的一小部分。”克鲁利说，“从不可言喻的观点来看，你们不敢肯定眼下的发展就不正确。”

Everyone found their eyes turning toward Adam. He seemed to be thinking very carefully.

所有人的目光都投向亚当。他似乎正在特别认真地思考。

Adam stood smiling at the two of them, a small figure perfectly poised exactly between Heaven and Hell.

亚当露出微笑，看着对面的两个人。小小的身影正好平衡在天堂与地狱之间。

There was the kind of silence there might have been on the day before Creation.

此刻的静寂，大概跟世界创生前类似。

A breeze swept across the airfield. Overhead, the assembled hosts rippled, like a mirage.

一阵微风在空军基地中吹过。上空群集的军容泛起涟漪，仿佛一个海市蜃楼。

There was a thundering explosion. Shadwell, who had been fidgeting with horrified excitement for some minutes, had finally got enough control of his trembling fingers to pull the trigger.

雷鸣般的爆炸声突然响起。沙德维尔已经被极度兴奋的情绪困扰了好几分钟，他终于略微控制住颤抖的手指，扣动了扳机。

Crowley grabbed Aziraphale’s arm. “You know what happened?” he hissed excitedly. “He was left alone! He grew up human! He’s not Evil Incarnate or Good Incarnate, he’s just… a human incarnate –“

克鲁利抓住亚茨拉菲尔的胳膊。“你知道是怎么回事吗？”他激动地嘶嘶说，“没人干扰他！他长成了人类！他既不是邪恶化身，也不是善良化身，他只是…人类的化身…”

Then:

接下来：

“I think,” said the Metatron, “that I shall need to seek further instructions.”

“我想，”梅塔特隆说，“我需要寻求进一步指示。”

“I alzzo,” said Beelzebub. His raging face turned to Crowley. “And I shall report of your part in thizz, thou hast better believe it.” He glared at Adam. “And I do not know what thy Father will say…”

“我也嗡是。”别西卜说完这话，将狂怒的面容转向克鲁利：“我会把你在这件事嗡中的行为报告上去嗡，你最好相信我说的话。”他又瞪着亚当说：“而且嗡我不知道你父亲会怎么说…”

The pellets passed through the space where Beelzebub had been. Shadwell never knew how lucky he had been that he’d missed.

一片霰弹从别西卜刚才所在的地方飞过。沙德维尔永远也不知道，射失这一枪是多大的运气。

The sky wavered, and then became just sky. Around the horizon, the clouds began to unravel.

天空波动了一下，变回单纯的天空。地平线附近的云层开始消散。

Madame Tracy broke the silence.

特蕾西夫人打破了沉寂。

“Is it over, do you think?” said Aziraphale.

“都结束了，你说呢？”亚茨拉菲尔说。

She didn’t mean “weren’t they odd”; what she did mean she probably could never hope to express, except by screaming, but the human brain has amazing recuperative powers and saying “weren’t they odd” was part of the rapid healing process. Within half an hour, she’d be thinking she’d just had too much to drink.

她并不是想说“他俩可真怪”。她真正想说的话，可能永远无法表达出来，除非是通过尖叫。但人类的大脑有极强的恢复力，而“他俩可真怪”这种话，是快速康复过程的一部分。在半小时内，特蕾西夫人就会认为自己只是喝多了。

“Weren’t they odd,” she said.

“他俩可真怪。”她说。

Crowley shrugged. “Not for us, I’m afraid.”

克鲁利耸耸肩。“恐怕对咱们来说还没完。”

“But you can’t just leave it at that!” said Anathema, pushing forward. “Think of all things you could do! Good things.”

“但你不能就这么走掉！”安娜丝玛挤上前来，“想想你所能做的事！好事。”

“I don’t think you need to go worryin’,” said Adam gnomically. “I know all about you two. Don’t you worry.”

“我想你们不用担心。”亚当郑重其事地说，“你们俩的事我都了解。别担心。”

He looked at the rest of the Them, who tried not to back away. He seemed to think for a while, and then he said, “There’s been too much messin’ around anyway. But it seems to me everyone’s goin’ to be a lot happier if they forget about this. Not actually forget, just not remember exactly. An’ then we can go home.”

他望向三个伙伴。他们努力控制住自己不要后退。亚当似乎想了一会儿，然后说：“现在的麻烦已经够多了。但我感觉，如果所有人都忘掉这件事，应该会更快活些。不是完全忘记，只是记不清楚。然后咱们就可以回家了。”

“Um,” said Crowley.

“唔。”克鲁利说。

He put his head on one side. “An’ that’d stop people killing them?”

亚当把头一歪。“这能阻止人们捕杀它们吗？”

“I was thinking that we might take these good people into town,” said Aziraphale. “I owe Madame Tracy a meal, I’m sure. And her young man, of course.”

“我在想，咱们也许应该把这些大好人送到镇上去。”亚茨拉菲尔说，“我欠特蕾西夫人一顿饭。当然，还有她的男朋友。”

“I think it might need a bit of work,” Crowley admitted.

“估计需要修理一下。”克鲁利说。

“That shows a very responsible attitude,” said Newt.

“这是很负责任的态度。”牛顿说。

“It’s just sense,” he said.

“只是常识。”他说。

Aziraphale patted Crowley on the back. “We seem to have survived,” he said. “Just imagine how terrible it might have been if we’d been at all competent.”

亚茨拉菲尔拍拍克鲁利的背。“咱们似乎捡了条命。”他说，“你想想看，要是咱们完全胜任自己的工作，那该有多恐怖。”

She hesitated. It would have been nice to say yes.

安娜丝玛有些为难。要是能说“是的”就好了。

“Like what?” said Adam suspiciously.

“比如说？”亚当疑惑地说。

“Well… you could bring all the whales back, to start with.”

“哦…首先，你可以把所有鲸鱼都弄回来。”

“Is your car operational?”

“你的车还能开吗？”

Adam raised an eyebrow.

亚当扬起一条眉毛。

“An’ if people do start killing ’em, what would you ask me to do about ’em?” said Adam. “No. I reckon I’m getting the hang of this now. Once I start messing around like that, there’d be no stoppin’ it. Seems to me, the only sensible thing is for people to know if they kill a whale, they’ve got a dead whale.”

“如果人们开始屠杀它们，你又会让我做什么？”亚当说，“不。我现在似乎已经摸清门路了。一旦我开始动起手脚，就别想停止。在我看来，最合理的方法是让人们明白，如果他们杀死一条鲸鱼，就会得到一条死鲸鱼。”

“Do you know,” she said, “of all the trite sayings I’ve ever really hated, that comes top?”

“你知道吗？”她说，“在所有我特别讨厌的陈词滥调中，这句话排第一。”

“But what actually happened?” said Pepper. “I mean, there was all this –“

“但到底出了什么事？”佩帕说，“我是说，所有这些…”

“I reckon we’ll just be gettin’ home,” he said.

“我觉得咱们该回家了。”他说。

“Hmm?”

“哦？”

“Because everywhere I go, I hold up traffic,” he mumbled wretchedly.

“因为我所到之处都会造成交通拥堵。”他可怜兮兮地嘀咕着。

“But you could help so much –” Anathema began, as they wandered back to their bikes. Newt took her gently by the arm.

“但你可以帮助那么多…”安娜丝玛说话时，他们已经向自行车走去。牛顿轻轻拉住她的胳膊。

“It wouldn’t be the same,” said Crowley.

“不可能跟原来一样。”克鲁利说。

“Who’s he talking about?” he asked her triumphant expression.

“他说的是谁？”中士问道。

“I’m sorry about the car,” Aziraphale was saying. “I know how much you liked it. Perhaps if you concentrated really hard –“

“你那辆车的事，我很遗憾。”亚茨拉菲尔在说，“我知道你有多喜欢它。也许如果你使劲集中精力…”

“That’s not a good idea,” he said. “Tomorrow is the first day of the rest of our lives.”

“这不是好主意。”他说，“明天是咱们新生活的第一天。”

“Amazing, isn’t it,” said Newt happily.

“不可思议，不是吗？”牛顿快活地说。

“It doesn’t matter any more,” said Adam.

“全都不重要了。”亚当说。

“Why’ve you got ‘Dick Turpin’ painted on the door of your car?”

“为什么你的车门上涂着大盗迪克·托平的字样？”

“It’s a joke, really,” said Newt.

“这是个笑话，真的。”牛顿说。

Crowley looked glumly at the controls of the jeep.

克鲁利沉着脸，看着吉普车的操纵装置。

Shadwell looked over his shoulder, and then up at Madame Tracy.

沙德维尔扭头往后看了一眼，然后又看了看特蕾西夫人。

Adam rejoined the Them.

亚当走到“他们”身边。

“But it’s over,” he said. “It can’t happen now! The — the thing, the correct moment or whatever — it’s gone past! It’s over!”

“但已经结束了。”他说，“不可能现在发生！那…那件事，正确的时机什么的，都已经过去了！结束了！”

Crowley fumbled madly with the gear shift.

克鲁利发疯似的摸索着换挡器。

“That’s not Beelzebub!” he shouted, above the noise of the wind. “That’s Him. His Father! This isn’t Armageddon, this is personal. Start, you bloody thing!”

“这不是别西卜！”他大声吼道，试图压过风声，“是他。他父亲！这不是末日之战，而是私事。启动啊，你这该死的玩意儿！”

“I had it from new, you know. It wasn’t a car, it was more a sort of whole body glove.”

“我买来时，它还是辆新车，你知道。它不只是辆车，更像是某种贴身潜水服。”

“What’s burning?” he said.

“什么东西烧着了？”他说。

“I suppose not.”

“我想也是。”

He turned his head, and looked into Aziraphale’s horrified expression.

克鲁利扭过头，看到亚茨拉菲尔惊恐的表情。

A breeze swept up the dust and dropped it again. The air became hot and heavy, imprisoning those within it like flies in syrup.

一阵微风卷起尘土，又把它们放下。空气变得闷热沉重，所有东西都凝在其中，就像果酱里的苍蝇。

The ground began to shake. The noise was like a subway train, but not one passing under. It was more like the sound of one coming up.

地面开始颤动。声响仿佛一辆地铁驶过，但这下面没有地铁。更像是有什么东西准备钻出地面。

He sniffed.

他抽了抽鼻子。

The ground moved under Anathema and Newt, flinging them onto the dancing concrete. Yellow smoke gushed from between the cracks.

安娜丝玛和牛顿脚下的地面猛地一摇，把他们扔在跳动的混凝土地面上。黄烟从裂缝中升起。

“Whatever it is, it’s pretty angry,” said Anathema.

“不管是什么东西，显然特别生气。”安娜丝玛说。

“It feels like a volcano!” shouted Newt. “What is it?”

“感觉像个火山口！”牛顿喊道，“怎么回事？”

“There are humans here,” he said.

“这里还有人类。”他说。

“Yes. So what? Lots of people in history have only done their jobs and look at the trouble they caused.”

“对。那又怎样？历史上很多人都只是尽自己的职责，看看他们惹下多大的麻烦吧。”

“We were only doing our jobs,” muttered Crowley.

“咱们只是尽自己的职责罢了。”克鲁利嘟囔道。

“Well, what –” Crowley began, and stopped.

“哦，那么…”克鲁利很快把嘴闭上。

“I mean, when you think about it, we’ve got them into enough trouble as it is. You and me. Over the years. What with one thing and another.”

“我是说，你仔细考虑一下。咱们已经给他们带来很多麻烦了。你和我。这些年来。考虑到这样那样的事情。”

In the jeep, Crowley was cursing. Aziraphale laid a hand on his shoulder.

在吉普车里，克鲁利不住咒骂。亚茨拉菲尔伸出一只手扶住他的肩头。

“I mean we shouldn’t let this happen to them.”

“我是说，咱们不能把他们卷进来。”

“Yes,” said Crowley. “And me.”

“对。”克鲁利说，“还有我。”

“You don’t mean we should actually try to stop Him?”

“你不是真想说，咱们应该试着阻止他吧？”

“What have you got to lose?”

“你还能失去什么？”

Crowley started to argue, and realized that he hadn’t anything. There was nothing he could lose that he hadn’t lost already. They couldn’t do anything worse to him than he had coming to him already. He felt free at last.

克鲁利刚要开口反驳，就意识到自己什么都没了。所有能失去的东西，他都已失去。考虑到他已经招惹上的麻烦，谁都不可能再加大惩罚的力度了。克鲁利最终感到自由。

He also felt under the seat and found a tire iron. It wouldn’t be any good, but then, nothing would. In fact it’d be much more terrible facing the Adversary with anything like a decent weapon. That way you might have a bit of hope, which would make it worse.

他往椅子底下摸了摸，发现一根轮胎撬棍。它没什么用处，但话说回来，什么东西都没用。实际上，如果拿着像样的武器面对撒旦，情况会可怕得多。它也许会让你抱有一丝希望，那只会更糟。

Aziraphale held out his hand.

亚茨拉菲尔伸出手。

Aziraphale held up the sword. There was a whoomph as it suddenly flamed like a bar of magnesium.

亚茨拉菲尔举起长剑。只听“砰”的一声，它像镁条似的冒出火焰。

Crowley took it.

克鲁利把它握住。

“That’s right,” said Crowley bitterly. “Make my day.”

“说得好。”克鲁利讥讽地说，“真让我感动啊。”

“Gosh, it’s been years since I used this,” he murmured.

“上帝啊，我已经有好多年没用过这玩意儿了。”他嘟囔道。

Aziraphale picked up the sword lately dropped by War, and hefted its weight thoughtfully.

亚茨拉菲尔捡起战争丢下的长剑，若有所思地掂了掂分量。

“Not really,” said Crowley. The noise was growing.

“算不上。”克鲁利说。轰鸣声越来越大。

“Ah. Yes. Too much messin’ about?”

“啊。是的。捣的乱太多了？”

“I’d just like to say,” he said, “if we don’t get out of this, that… I’ll have known, deep down inside, that there was a spark of goodness in you.”

“我只想说，”他说，“如果咱们不能幸免，那么…我知道，在你内心深处，始终有一丝善良的火花。”

“Yes.”

“嗯。”

“Once you’ve learned how to do it, you never forget,” he said.

“只要你学会了该怎么做，就永远不会忘记。”他说。

“People knew the difference between right and wrong in those days,” said Aziraphale dreamily.

“那年月，人们知道好歹。”亚茨拉菲尔沉浸在回忆中。

He smiled at Crowley.

天使冲克鲁利笑了笑。

“Yes.”

“是啊。”

“My word, yes,” said the angel. “What a day that was, and no mistake. Good old days.”

“没错。”天使说，“毫无疑问，那是多好的日子啊。过去的好时光。”

“Here’s to the next time,” he said. “And… Aziraphale?”

“有缘再见。”他说，“对了…亚茨拉菲尔？”

“About six thousand,” said Crowley.

“大概六千年。”克鲁利说。

“Well, yes. Think about it.”

“哦，是的。回想起来，也没错。”

“Nice knowing you,” he said.

“很高兴认识你。”他说。

“Just remember I’ll have known that, deep down inside, you were just enough of a bastard to be worth liking.”

“记住我这句话。我也知道，在你内心深处，你就是个讨人喜欢的混球。”

“I wouldna’ trust you two Southern nancy boys to kill a lame rat in a barrel,” he said. “Who’re we fightin’ noo?”

“俺不信任侬。侬们俩娘娘腔南蛮子，估计连酒桶里的瘸腿老鼠都对付不了。”他说，“咱跟谁儿打？”

“The Devil,” said Aziraphale, simply.

“撒旦本尊。”亚茨拉菲尔言简意赅地说。

Shadwell nodded, as if this hadn’t come as a surprise, threw the gun down, and took off his hat to expose a forehead known and feared wherever street-fighting men were gathered together.

沙德维尔点点头，似乎一点也不吃惊。他把枪放下，摘下帽子，露出所有街巷斗士都熟识乃至惧怕的额头。

There was a scuffing noise, and they were pushed aside by the small but dynamic shape of Shadwell, waving the Thundergun purposefully.

一阵刮蹭声响起，他们被某个矮小的动态物体挤开。它是沙德维尔，正果决地挥舞着雷电枪。

“Ah reckoned so,” he said. “In that case, I’m gonna use mah haid.”

“一猜就是。”他说，“这么着，俺用手就中。”

The coats of Aziraphale and Crowley split along the seams. If you were going to go, you might as well go in your own true shape. Feathers unfolded towards the sky.

亚茨拉菲尔和克鲁利的大衣沿接缝撕裂。如果你必须离去，那最好是以真身上路。洁白的羽翼伸向蓝天。

Newt and Anathema watched the three of them walk unsteadily away from the jeep. With Shadwell in the middle, they looked like a stylized W.

牛顿和安娜丝玛看着三个人晃晃悠悠离开吉普车。沙德维尔走在中间，他们看起来像个艺术体的W。

“What on earth are they going to do?” said Newt. “And what’s happening — what’s happening to them?”

“他们到底要干什么去？”牛顿说，“他们…他们是怎么回事？”

“What’s a Shadwell?”

“谁是沙德维尔？”

“He’s my serg — he’s this amazing old man, you’d never believe it… I’ve got to help him!”

“他是我的中…他就是这个神奇的老人，你肯定不会相信的…我得去帮他！”

“Who’re those other two, then? Friends of yours –” Anathema began, and stopped. Aziraphale had half turned, and the profile had finally clicked into place.

“那么，另外那两个是谁？你的朋友…”安娜丝玛突然愣住了。亚茨拉菲尔半转过身，侧影终于对上了号。

“If he’s damaged the book, you’re bloody well right!”

“如果他弄坏了那本书，你说的就他妈没错！”

“I took an oath and everything.” Newt hesitated. “Well, sort of an oath. And he gave me a month’s wages in advance!”

“我发过誓什么的。”牛顿含含糊糊地说，“好吧，差不多像个誓言。而且他提前给了我一个月的薪水！”

Contrary to popular belief, the wings of demons are the same as the wings of angels, although they’re often better groomed.

跟通行的看法不同，恶魔的翅膀和天使完全一样，只是通常梳理得更加整齐。

“Shadwell shouldn’t be going with them!” said Newt, staggering to his feet.

“沙德维尔不能跟他们走！”牛顿摇晃着站起身。

“I know where I’ve seen him before!” she shouted, pulling herself upright against Newt as the ground bounced up and down. “Come on!”

“我就知道以前见过他！”安娜丝玛喊道。地面上下抖动，她扶着牛顿站了起来。“快来！”

“But something dreadful’s going to happen!”

“但有某种可怕的事情就要发生了！”

Newt fumbled in his lapel and found his official pin. He didn’t know what they were going up against this time, but a pin was all he had.

牛顿摸了摸自己的翻领，找到那根军用大头针。他不知道这次要对付的是什么东西，但这根针是他唯一的武器。

“Help him?” said Anathema.

“帮他？”安娜丝玛说。

They ran…

他们跑了起来。

Adam looked around. He looked down. His face took on an expression of calculated innocence.

亚当向周围看。他向下看。脸上露出恰到好处的天真无邪。

He moved one hand around in a blurred half circle.

他抬起一只手，划过一个模糊的半圆。

There was no noise. There were no cracks. There was just that where there had been the beginnings of a volcano of Satanic power, there was just clearing smoke, and a car drawing slowly to a halt, its engine loud in the evening hush.

这里没有轰鸣。这里没有噼啪爆响。这里不过是地狱火山即将爆发的地方，只有渐渐散去的青烟，和一辆慢慢停下的车。引擎声在夜晚的静寂中，显得格外响亮。

… Aziraphale and Crowley felt the world change.

…亚茨拉菲尔和克鲁利感到世界在改变。

There was a moment of conflict. But Adam was on his own ground. Always, and ultimately, on his own ground.

的确有一瞬间的矛盾。但这是他的强项。最后总会是他的强项。

It was an elderly car, but well preserved. Not using Crowley’s method, though, where dents were simply wished away; this car looked like it did, you knew instinctively, because its owner had spent every weekend for two decades doing all the things the manual said should be done every weekend. Before every journey he walked around it and checked the lights and counted the wheels. Serious-minded men who smoked pipes and wore mustaches had written serious instructions saying that this should be done, and so he did it, because he was a serious-minded man who smoked a pipe and wore a mustache and did not take such injunctions lightly, because if you did, where would you be? He had exactly the right amount of insurance. He drove three miles below the speed limit, or forty miles per hour, whichever was the lower. He wore a tie, even on Saturdays.

这是辆老车，但保养得很好。当然不是用克鲁利的保养法，宾利车上的凹痕都是在转念间消失的。你只要看见这辆车，就会发自本能地相信这一点：二十多年来，它的主人每到周末都会执行手册所说的、每周末应该进行的保养工作。在每次出行前，他会绕着车转一圈，检查车灯，清数轮胎。抽烟斗留胡子的认真负责的男人写下了认真负责的建议，告诉人们应该怎么做，所以他就照办了。因为他也是抽烟斗留胡子的认真负责的男人，不会小视这些建议。如果你不这么做，那成何体统？他上了数目精确的车险。他开车从来比最高限速慢三英里，而且绝不超过四十。他打领带，哪怕是在周六。

“What’s he been getting up to now?” he sighed, not really expecting an answer.

“他又要折腾什么去啊？”扬先生叹了口气，并没指望得到回答。

“What’s going on here?” he said. “Adam? Adam!”

“这儿是怎么回事？”他说，“亚当？亚当！”

He could smell apple pie. That was one of the things he’d missed most about spending his Saturday nights a long way from home.

他闻到苹果派味。驻扎在离家千里的地方，每到周六夜晚，苹果派是戴森博格最想念的东西之一。

He could have stood on Mr. Young.

他可以站在扬先生身上。

Mr. Young looked at the shocked assembly. At least Crowley and Aziraphale had had enough self-control left to winch in their wings.

扬先生看了看震惊的人们。至少克鲁利和亚茨拉菲尔还有足够的自控能力，适时收起了翅膀。

But the Them were streaking towards the gate.

但“他们”已经朝大门骑去。

The car door opened and Mr. Young emerged.

车门打开，扬先生走了出来。

Adam seldom did what his father wanted.

但亚当很少听父亲的话。

“Where’s that boy got to? Adam! Come back here this instant!”

“那孩子跑哪儿去了？亚当！马上给我过来！”

Sgt. Thomas A. Deisenburger opened his eyes. The only thing strange about his surroundings was how familiar they were. There was his high school photograph on the wall, and his little Stars and Stripes flag in the toothmug, next to his toothbrush, and even his little teddy bear, still in its little uniform. The early afternoon sun flooded through his bedroom window.

托马斯·A。戴森博格睁开眼。周围的环境只有一点他觉得奇怪，那就是为何如此熟悉。墙上挂着他中学时的照片，小星条旗就插在牙缸里，放在牙刷旁。就连他的小泰迪熊也在这儿，还穿着那身小制服。午后的阳光从卧室窗户洒了进来。

Archimedes said that with a long enough lever and a solid enough place to stand, he could move the world.

阿基米德曾说，给我一个足够长的杠杆，和一个足够站立的坚实之地，我就可以撬动地球。

The van drove slowly up to the gates of the air base. It pulled over. The guard on the midnight shift looked in the window, checked the credentials of the driver, and waved him in.

一辆面包车缓缓驶向空军基地的大门。它停下来。夜班卫兵往车窗里看了一眼，检查司机的通行证，然后挥手让他进去。

“I said, if anyone calls, Mom, I’ll be down in the Big Field, with Pop and Chester and Ted.”

“我说，如果有人打电话来，妈，告诉他我去大球场了，跟老爸、切斯特和特德在一起。”

“Mom, if any throughput eventuates premising to interface with Sgt. Thomas A. Deisenburger telephonically, Mom, sir, this individual will –“

“妈，如果出现任何行动，意图以通话模式接洽托马斯·A。戴森博格中士。这一个体将…”

Tom Deisenburger hung his gun on the wall, above his father’s battered old rifle.

托马斯·A。戴森博格把枪挂上墙，就放在父亲破烂老旧的步枪之上。

Sgt. Thomas A. Deisenburger nodded.

托马斯·A。戴森博格中士点点头。

“Sorry, Tommy?”

“你说什么，汤米？”

He walked downstairs.

戴森博格走下楼梯。

His mother was at the stove, taking a huge apple pie out of the oven to cool.

他妈妈站在炉子旁，从烤箱里拿出个巨大的苹果派，让它冷却。

“Hi, Tommy,” she said. “I thought you was in England.”

“嗨，汤米。”她说，“我还以为你在英国。”

“Yes, Mom, I am normatively in England, Mom, protecting democratism, Mom, sir,” said Sgt. Thomas A. Deisenburger.

“是的，妈，我通常是在英国。妈，保卫民主主义，妈，长官。”托马斯·A。戴森博格说。

“That’s nice, hon,” said his mother. “Your Poppa’s down in the Big Field, with Chester and Ted. They’ll be pleased to see you.”

“那很好，宝贝。”他妈妈说，“你爹到大球场去了，跟切斯特和特德在一起。他们见到你肯定会很高兴。”

He took off his military-issue helmet and his military-issue jacket, and he rolled up his military-issue shirtsleeves. For a moment he looked more thoughtful than he had ever done in his life. Part of his thoughts were occupied with apple pie.

他摘下军队制式头盔，脱掉军队制式上衣，卷起军队制式衬衫袖子。有一瞬间，他似乎在思考，大概是有生以来想得最深的一次。但他的部分思路被苹果派占据了。

“Are you saying,” said Crowley, “that He planned it this way all along? From the very beginning?”

“你是想说，”克鲁利说，“他计划了这一切？打一开始？”

Aziraphale conscientiously wiped the top of the bottle and passed it back.

亚茨拉菲尔很自觉地抹了抹瓶口，把酒递给恶魔。

“And of course that’s true,” said the angel. “Otherwise, what’d be the point?”

“他当然知道。”天使说，“要不然，这还有什么意义？”

“From what I remember,” replied Crowley, thoughtfully, “– and we were never actually on what you might call speaking terms — He wasn’t exactly one for a straight answer. In fact, in fact, he’d never answer at all. He’d just smile, as if He knew something that you didn’t.”

“我和他根本连人们常说的泛泛之交都谈不上。”克鲁利思虑着说，“但我记得，他就不是个会直接回答问题的人。实际上，实际上，他根本就不回答。他只是微笑，就好像知道什么你不知道的东西。”

The van meandered across the concrete.

面包车缓缓驶过空场。

The van driver got out of the van, carrying a cardboard box and a pair of tongs.

面包车司机走出面包车，手里拿着个纸板盒，还有一对夹子。

It parked on the tarmac of the empty airstrip, near where two men sat, sharing a bottle of wine. One of the men wore dark glasses. Surprisingly, no one else seemed to be paying them the slightest attention.

它停在空荡荡的跑道停机坪上。不远处坐着两个人，正在分享一瓶红酒。其中一个戴着墨镜。奇怪的是，完全没人注意他们。

“Could have,” he said. “Could have. One could always ask Him, I suppose.”

“有可能。”他说，“有可能。我想可以去问问他。”

There was a pause, and both beings stared reflectively off into the distance, as if they were remembering things that neither of them had thought of for a long time.

他们沉默片刻，若有所思地看着远方，似乎都想起了一些很久没有考虑过的问题。

“Excuse me, gents,” he said, “but there’s meant to be a sword around here somewhere as well, at least, that’s what it says here at any rate, and I was wondering…”

“抱歉，打扰一下，先生们。”他说，“但应该还有一柄剑在这附近。至少上面是这么写的，我在想…”

Lying on the tarmac were a tarnished metal crown and a pair of scales. The man picked them up with the tongs and placed them in the box.

停机坪上躺着一顶失去光泽的金属王冠，还有一具天平。那人用夹子把它们拾起，放进盒子。

Then he approached the couple with the bottle.

然后他走向正在喝酒的两个人。

The van driver, who wore an International Express cap, said not to mention it, and really it was a godsend them both being there like this, since someone was going to have to sign to say that he’d duly collected what he’d been sent for, and this had certainly been a day to remember, eh?

面包车司机头戴国际速递的帽子，他说，这不值一提，而且他俩正好在这儿，真是天赐之喜，因为必须有人签个字，证明他按照要求回收了这些东西。而且今天肯定是值得铭记的一天，不是吗？

Aziraphale and Crowley both agreed with him that it had, and Aziraphale signed the clipboard that the van driver gave him, witnessing that a crown, a pair of balances, and a sword had been received in good order and were to be delivered to a smudged address and charged to a blurred account number.

亚茨拉菲尔和克鲁利都表示同意。面包车司机递来一个笔记板，天使签下名字，证明一顶王冠、一具天平和一柄剑已经被完好无损地收件，并将递送到一个被污渍盖住的地址，并由一个字迹模糊的账号缴费。

Aziraphale seemed embarrassed. He looked around himself, vaguely puzzled, then stood up, to discover that he had been sitting on the sword for the last hour or so. He reached down and picked it up. “Sorry,” he said, and put the sword into the box.

亚茨拉菲尔有点尴尬。他环顾四周，稍显迷惑，然后站起身，发现自己已经在那把剑上坐了一个多小时。亚茨拉菲尔伸手把它拿起来。“抱歉。”他说着将剑放入纸盒。

It had a cassette player. This isn’t general issue, even for American military vehicles, but Crowley automatically assumed that all vehicles he drove would have cassette players and therefore this one did, within seconds of his getting in.

这辆车有台录音机。这并不符合标准配置，哪怕美国军用车辆也没有音响系统。但克鲁利自然而然地认为，他开的所有车上都会有卡带录音机，因此这辆吉普上也有。他刚坐进来没几秒钟就有了。

“Come on,” he said. “I’ll drive us back to London.”

“来吧。”他说，“我来开车，送咱们回伦敦。”

Crowley stood up, a little unsteadily. He reached a hand down to Aziraphale.

克鲁利站起身，脚底下有点不稳。他朝亚茨拉菲尔伸出一只手。

The man began to walk back to his van. Then he stopped, and turned.

那人走向面包车，突然停住脚步，转过身来。

“If I was to tell my wife what happened to me today,” he told them, a little sadly, “she’d never believe me. And I wouldn’t blame her, because I don’t either.” And he climbed into his van, and he drove away.

“如果我把今天的遭遇告诉妻子。”他有点难过地对他们说，“她肯定不会相信。也不能怪她，连我自己都不信。”他爬上面包车，慢慢开走了。

He took a Jeep. No one stopped them.

他坐进一辆吉普。谁都没阻止他们。

The cassette that he put on as he drove was marked Handel’s Water Music, and it stayed Handel’s Water Music all the way home.

克鲁利发动汽车。他塞进去的磁带是德国作曲家韩德尔的名曲《水上音乐》，这一路上它始终都是韩德尔的《水上音乐》。