Mama opened her sewing box. “It’s not all right. Now go get it for me.”
妈妈打开了针线盒：“怎么合身了？快拿过来。”
“Stacey, go bring me your coat,” Mama said a few days later as we gathered around the fire after supper. “I’ve got time to take up the sleeves now.”
几天后的某个晚上，我们用过晚餐，围坐在火炉旁聊天，妈妈突然对斯泰西说：“斯泰西，把你的外套拿来，我正好给你改一改袖子。”
Little Man cupped his hand and whispered to me, “Boy, now he’s gonna get it!”
小家伙捂着嘴巴，跟我说着悄悄话：“天哪，这样就要被发现了！”
“Uh-oh!” exclaimed Christopher-John, then immediately opened his reader as Mama looked down at him.
“哦哦！”克里斯托弗喊道，然后当妈妈低头看着他时，马上打开了他的读物。
“Uh… th-that’s all right, Mama,” stuttered Stacey. “The ccoat’s all right like it is.”
“啊…好吧，妈妈。”斯泰西犹犹豫豫地说，“那外套现在穿起来正合身呢。”
“Not got the coat!” cried Big Ma. Uncle Hammer looked up sharply from his paper, but remained silent.
“为什么！”奶奶很吃惊，哈默大伯也抬起了头，不过神色镇定。
“But, Mama, I really ain’t got it! I gave it to T. J.”
“但是，妈妈，我真的没有那件外套！我把它给提杰了！”
“Stacey,” Mama said initably, “bring me that coat, boy.”
“斯泰西，把外套给我拿来。”妈妈看起来很生气。
“T. J.!” Mama exclaimed.
“提杰！”妈妈尖叫起来。
Stacey stood up and started slowly toward his room. Little Man, Christopher-John, and I watched him closely, wondering what he was going to do. He actually went into the room, but was gone only a moment before he reappeared and nervously clutched the back of his chair. “I ain’t got the coat, Mama,” he said.
斯泰西慢慢站起来，回到房间里。我、小家伙和克里斯托弗紧张地看着他，想知道他接下来会怎么办。不一会儿，斯泰西出来了，他紧张地抓着椅背：“妈妈，我没有那件外套。”
Then, seeming more afraid of the silence than putting his neck further into the noose, he added, “But I didn’t give it to him for good, Mama — just lent it to him till I get big enough for it and then…
斯泰西有些局促不安，他接着说：“我并没有把那件外套送给他，妈妈，我只是借给他，等我大些了，就拿回来…”
“Yes, ma’am, Mama,” Stacey answered, then went on hurriedly as Mama’s eyes glittered with· rising anger. “The coat was too big for me and… and T. J. said it made me look like… like a preacher… and he said since it fit him just right, he’d… he’d take it off my hands till I grow into it, then that away all the guys would stop laughing at me and calling me preacher.” He paused, waiting for someone to speak: but the only sound was a heavy breathing and the crackle of burning hickory.
“是的，妈妈。”斯泰西看到妈妈眼里燃着愤怒的火焰时，赶紧解释说，“那件外套对我来说太大了…提杰说，我看起来…我看起来像一个胖牧师…然后他说，先借给他穿，等到我长高一点再还给我…这样，他们就不会嘲笑我，叫我胖牧师了。”他顿了顿，等待着有谁能说些什么。屋子里除了沉重的呼吸声和胡桃木燃烧的爆裂声之外，一片沉寂。
Stacey’s voice faded into an inaudible whisper as Mama slowly put the sewing box on the table behind her. I thought she was headed for the wide leather strap hanging in the kitchen, but she did not rise. In quiet anger she glared at Stacey and admonished, “In this house we do not give away what loved ones give to us. Now go bring me that coat.”
妈妈把针线盒放到身后的桌子上。斯泰西的声音越变越小，快听不见了。我以为妈妈会起身去厨房把宽皮带拿过来，但她只是僵着脸，盯着斯泰西：“我们家里的任何一个人，都不会把心爱之人送给我们的东西随便给别人。现在，把外套拿回来。”
“Well, ain’t Stacey got a brain! What the devil should he care what T. J. thinks or T. J. says! Who is this T. J. anyway! Does he put clothes on Stacey’s back or food in front of him!” Uncle Hammer stood and walked over to Stacey as Little Man, Christopher-John, and I followed him fearfully with our eyes. “I suppose if T. J. told you it was summer- time out there and you should run buck naked down the road because everybody else was doing it, you’d do that too, huh!”
“斯泰西没有脑子吗？他凭什么要在意提杰想什么、说什么？他是你什么人？供你吃、供你穿吗？”哈默大伯起身，走向斯泰西，“要是提杰跟你说，现在是夏天，让你去裸奔，因为街上的人都这样，你也会这么做吗？”
Backing away from her anger, Stacey turned to leave, but Uncle Hammer stopped him. “No,” he said, “leave the coat where it is.”
斯泰西转身正要离开，哈默大伯拦住了他：“不用了，把外套留给提杰吧。”
Uncle Hammer leaned back in his chair, his eyes cold on Stacey. “Seems to me if Stacey’s not smart enough to hold on to a good coat, he don’t deserve it. As far as I’m concerned, T. J. can just keep that coat permanently. At least he knows a good thing when he sees it.”
哈默大伯倚在椅子上，眼神有些冷：“对我来说，斯泰西不好好爱惜这件外套，那他也不值得拥有它。提杰可以永远拥有那件外套，至少他知道，那是件好外套。”
“Hammer,” Big Ma said, “let the boy go get the coat. That T. J. probably done told him all sorts –“
“哈默，让斯泰西去把外套拿回来吧。提杰只是在耍把戏。”奶奶说。
Mama turned bewildered toward Uncle Hammer. “Hammer, what’re you saying! That’s the best coat Stacey’s ever had and probably ever will have as long as he lives in this house. David and I can’t afford a coat like that”.
妈妈困惑地转向哈默叔叔。“哈默，你说什么呢？这可是斯泰西住在这所房子以来最好的一件外套了。大卫和我买不起那样的外套。”
“N-no sir,” Stacey replied, looking at the floor.
“不，不会。”斯泰西盯着地板。
Stacey managed a shaky “Yes sir.”
“是…是的。”斯泰西打了个寒战。
This time Stacey could only nod.
斯泰西点点头。
“Now you hear me good on this — look at me when I talk to you, boy!” Immediately Stacey raised his head and looked at Uncle Hammer. “If you ain’t got the brains of a flea to see that this T, J. fellow made a fool of you, then you’ll never get anywhere in this world. It’s tough out there, boy, and as long as there are people, there’s gonna be somebody trying to take what you got and trying to drag you down. It’s up to you whether you let them or not. Now it seems to me you wanted that coat when I gave it to you, ain’t that right!”
“现在，你给我好好听着——抬头！我在跟你讲话！”斯泰西慌忙抬起头，哈默大伯接着说，“要是你连这是提杰的把戏都看不出来的话，你的未来就没希望了。这世界很复杂，孩子，只要你有好东西，就会有人来抢，想尽一切办法把你打倒。至于他们能不能得逞，完全取决于你自己。你很喜欢我送给你的外套吧？”
“Then if you want something and it’s a good thing and you got it in the right way, you better hang on to it and don’t let nobody talk you out of it. You care what a lot of useless people say ’bout you you’ll never get anywhere, ’cause there’s a lotta folks don’t want you to make it. You understand what I’m telling you!”
“如果你有什么好东西，而且是通过正常途径获得的，那就好好珍惜它，别因为别人的三言两语，你就动摇了。这样什么事也做不好。那些人只是不想看到你拥有好东西，知道了吗？”
“And anybody with any sense would know it’s a good thing, ain’t that right!”
“只要有点眼光的人，都知道那是件好外套，是吗？”
Uncle Hammer turned then and went back to his paper without having laid a hand on Stacey, but Stacey shook visibly from the encounter.
哈默大伯继续低头看报，斯泰西在角落里紧张地发着抖。
Christopher-John, Little Man, and I exchanged apprehensive glances. I don’t know what they were thinking. but I for one was deciding right then and there not to do anything to rub Uncle Hammer the wrong way; I had no intention of ever facing a tongue-lashing like that. Papa’s bottom-warming whippings were quite enough for me, thank you, The last days of school before Christmas seemed interminable. Each night I fell asleep with the hope that the morning would bring Papa, and each morning when he wasn’t there I trudged to school consoling myself that he would be home when I returned. But the days passed, prickly cold and windy, and he did not come.
我、小家伙和克里斯托弗互相交换了眼神，我不晓得他们在想些什么，不过我下定决心，以后再也不会做任何惹哈默大伯生气的事。我可不想像斯泰西那样，被大伯骂得狗血淋头。圣诞假期前几天，似乎格外漫长。我每晚都怀着希望入眠，期冀早上醒来能见到爸爸，但希望总是一次次地破灭。我只能在放学回家的路上，盼望着回家能见到爸爸。日子一天天过去了，天气寒冷而且多风，可爸爸依然没有回来。
“Y-yessir, Uncle Hammer.” Stacey stammered.
“知…知道了，哈默大伯。”斯泰西结结巴巴地回答。
Added to the misery of the waiting and the cold was Lillian Jean, who managed to flounce past me with a superior smirk twice that week. I had already decided that she had had two flounces too many, but since I hadn’t yet decided how to handle the matter, I postponed doing anything until after I had had a chance to talk with Papa about the whole Strawberry business. I knew perfectly well that he would not tear out of the house after Mr. Simms as Uncle Hammer had done, for he always took time to think through any move he made, but he would certainly advise me on how to handle Lillian Jean.
一日日的等待越来越揪心，一天天的寒冷越来越难挨。更糟糕的是，莉莲这个星期两次遇到我，都带着假惺惺的微笑。我不知道怎么应对她，因为我还没有想好怎么处理那件事情。我想等到爸爸回来后，跟他好好聊一聊斯特罗贝里的事情。爸爸听完后，一定不会气冲冲地跑去教训西蒙先生。他会认真地思考，给我一些建议。
Then too there was T. J., who, although not really my problem, was so obnoxiously flaunting Stacey’s wool coat during these cold days that I had just about decided to deflate him at the same time I took care of Lillian Jean. Ever since the night Mr. Avery had brought him to the house to return the coat and he had been told by Uncle Hammer and a faltering Stacey that the coat was his, T. J. had been more un- bearable than usual. He now praised the coat from the wide tips of its lapels to the very edges of its deep hem. No one had ever had a finer coat; no one had ever looked better in such a coat; no one could ever hope to have such a coat again.
提杰也很烦人。虽然跟我没什么直接关系，但自从艾弗里先生带着提杰到我家来还外套，哈默大伯说外套归提杰后，提杰就更加放肆地炫耀那件外套。他天天在那里说外套的翻领如何帅气，褶边如何好看，没有人的外套比他的更好看，没有人能比他更适合这件外套。
Stacey was restrained from plugging T. J.’s mouth by Uncle Hammer’s principle that a man did not blame others for his own stupidity; he learned from his mistake and be- came stronger for it. I, however, was not so restrained and as far as I was concerned, if T. J. kept up with this coat business, he could just hit the dirt at the same time as “Miss” Lillian Jean.
斯泰西恨不得塞住提杰的嘴，可一想到哈默大伯说的不要因为自己的愚蠢去责备任何人时，他又忍住了。他从这件事里吸取了教训，成长了许多。不过我觉得，要是提杰还继续这样到处炫耀，斯泰西肯定会爆发的。
The day before Christmas I awoke to the soft murmuring of quiet voices gathered in the midnight blackness of morning. Big Ma was not beside me, and without a moment’s doubt I knew why she was gone. Jumping from the bed, my feet barely hitting the deerskin rug, I rushed into Mama’s room.
圣诞前夜，我从细微的窸窸窣窣声中醒来，奶奶并没有在我身旁，我一下猜到她去了哪儿。我跳下床，光脚踏上地毯，冲进了妈妈的房间。
“Oh, Papa!” I cried. “I knew it was you!”
“哦，爸爸！”我兴奋地大叫，“我就知道是你！”
“Ah, there’s my Cassie girl!” Papa laughed, standing to catch me as I leapt into his arms.
“哦，我的凯西宝贝！”爸爸笑着站在那儿。我冲向了他的怀抱。
By evening, it reeked of Christmas. In the kitchen sweet-potato pies, egg-custard pies, and rich butter pound cakes cooled; a gigantic coon which Mr. Morrison, Uncle Hammer, and Stacey had secured in a night’s hunt baked in a sea of onions, garlic, and fat orange-yellow yams; and a choice sugar-cured ham brought from the smokehouse awaited its turn in the oven. In the heart of the house, where we had gathered after sup per, freshly cut branches of long-needled pines lay over the fireplace mantle adorned by winding vines of winter holly and bright red Christmas berries. And in the fireplace itself, in a black pan set on a high wire rack, peanuts roasted over the hickory fire as the waning light of day swiftly deepened into a fine velvet night speckled with white forerunners of a coming snow, and the warm sound of husky voices and rising laughter mingled in tales of sorrow and happiness of days past but not forgotten.
到了晚上，厨房里堆满了圣诞大餐：甜马铃薯派、蛋奶酥、乳酪蛋糕，还有一只烤浣熊——那是莫里森先生、哈默大伯和斯泰西抓到的。那只美味的浣熊正被浸泡在洋葱、大蒜和浓郁的甘薯酱料中，令人垂涎欲滴。一盘从熏肉坊里拿来的火腿肉正等着进烤箱。屋子中间，一棵针叶松木青翠挺拔，上面装饰着盘曲的冬青树枝与闪亮的红色浆果。火炉上搭着的高脚架上放着一个黑色平底锅，里面的花生在山胡桃木的炙烤下散发着迷人的香味。夕阳西下，夜色渐沉，天鹅绒般的夜空洒落着雪花朵朵，屋里充满欢声笑语，大家都在分享着难忘的往日时光。
By the dawn, the house smelled of Sunday: chicken frying, bacon sizzling, and smoke sausages baking.
天刚蒙蒙亮，屋子里便弥漫着食物的香气：烤鸡的香味、熏培根的味道、烤香肠的油香。
“… Them watermelons of old man Ellis’ seemed like they just naturally tasted better than anybody else’s,” said Papa, “and ole Hammer and me, we used to sneak up there when- ever it’d get so hot you couldn’t hardly move and take a couple of them melons on down to the pond and let them get real chilled. Then, talking ’bout eating! We did some kind of good eating.”
“…那时，埃利斯家的西瓜总是比别人家的甜。”爸爸打开了话匣子，“夏天的时候哈默和我常常溜到他家田里，拿上两个西瓜，放到池子里，那冰冰凉的西瓜甜味真是美妙！”
“Papa, you was stealing!” asked an astonished Little Man. Although he usually strongly disapproved of being held, he was now reclining comfortably in Papa’s lap.
“爸爸，你还偷人东西？”小家伙吃了一惊，他正舒舒服服地靠在爸爸的膝盖上，听爸爸这么说，一下坐起来。
“Problem was, though,” laughed Uncle Hammer, “old man Ellis grew them ole fat green round watermelons and ours was long and striped –“
哈默大伯笑了：“关键是，埃利斯家的西瓜又大又甜，而我们的西瓜又长又瘪——”
“Well…” Papa said, “not exactly. What we’d do was ex- change one of the melons from our patch for his. Course it was still wrong for us to do it, but at the time it seemed all right –“
“呃，也不算吧。”爸爸解释道，“我们是跟他换西瓜吃的。不过这样做也不对，但那个时候，也无所谓啦。”
“And Mr. Ellis was always right particular ’bout his melons,” interjected Papa. “He took the longest time to figure out what we was up to, but, Lord, Lord, when he did –“
“埃利斯可宝贝他们家的西瓜了呢。”爸爸说，“他总能猜到我们什么时候去偷瓜，真是神了。”
“– You should’ve seen us run,” Uncle Hammer said, standing. He shot one hand against and past the other. “Ma — an! We was gone! And that ole man was right behind us with a hickory stick hitting us up side the head –“
“——那个时候你就得赶紧跑了。”哈默大伯站了起来，“我们那时跑啊跑啊，以为甩开了他，可是一回头，埃利斯的木棍正准备敲我们俩的头呢。”
“Ow — weee! That ole man could run!” cried Papa. “I didn’t know nobody’s legs could move that fast.”
“哈哈，那老头儿可真能跑！真不知道有谁跑起来比他还快。”爸爸说。
Through the evening Papa and Uncle Hammer and Big Ma and Mr. Morrison and Mama lent us their memories, acting out their tales with stage worthy skills, imitating the characters in voice, manner, and action so well that the listeners held their sides with laughter. It was a good warm time.
那晚，爸爸、妈妈、奶奶、哈默大伯和莫里森先生分享着彼此的故事，甚至还绘声绘色地演了起来，让我们笑破了肚皮，真是一段好时光呀。
Big Ma chuckled. “And as I recalls, your Papa ’bout wore y’all out when Mr. Ellis told him what y’all’d been up to. Course, you know all them Ellises was natural-born runners. Y’all remember Mr. Ellis’ brother, Tom Lee? Well, one time he…”
奶奶也忍俊不禁：“我也想起来了，那时你爸爸听到埃利斯先生来告状，恨不得狠狠揍你们一顿呢。埃利斯一家的确是生来的跑步能手啊，你还记得他的哥哥汤姆吗？有一次他…”
“… They come down like ghosts that Christmas of seventy-six. Them was hard times like now and my family was living in a shantytown right outside Shreveport. Reconstruction was just ’bout over then, and them Northern soldiers was tired of being in the South and they didn’t hardly care ’bout no black folks in shantytown. And them Southern whites, they was tired of the Northern soldiers and free Negroes, and they was trying to turn things back ’round to how they used to be. And the colored folks… well, we was just tired. Warn’t hardly no work, and during them years I s’pose it was jus’ ’bout as hard being free as it was being a slave…”
“1976年的那个圣诞节，跟现在一样寒冷。我们一家当时住在什里夫波特（美国路易斯安那州西北部城市）外的贫民窟。重建时期刚刚过去，北方士兵们厌倦了在南方的日子，也不想理会那些住在贫民窟里的黑人；而南方的白人们，厌倦了跟北方佬以及黑人纠缠，想把世界恢复成旧模样。我们这些人呢…我们也厌倦了，没有工作，没有自由，活得还是像奴隶一样…”
But as the night deepened and the peanuts in the pan grew shallow, the voices grew hushed, and Mr. Morrison said :
夜色渐深，锅里的花生也渐渐见了底。莫里森先生开始说起他的故事：
“That night they come — I can remember just as good — it was told, so cold we had to huddle all ‘gainst each other just trying to keep warm, and two boys –’bout eighteen or nineteen, I reckon — come knocking on my daddy’s door. They was scairt, clean out of their heads with fright. They’d just come back from Shreveport. Some white woman done accused them of molestin’ her and they didn’t know nowhere to run so they come up to my daddy’s ’cause he had a good head and he was big, bigger than me. He was strong too. So strong he could break a man’s leg easy as if he was snapping a twig — I seen him do it that night. And the white folks was scairt of him. But my daddy didn’t hardly have time to finish hearing them boys’ story when them devilish night men swept down –“
“那天晚上很冷、很冷，冷得我们一家人得环抱在一起互相取暖。两个十八九岁的男孩敲了我们家的门，他们满脸惊恐，瑟瑟发抖。他们是刚从什里夫波特过来的，被一个白人妇女控告性骚扰。他们无处可逃，只能跑到我家来找我父亲帮忙。我的父亲很强壮，几乎可以轻而易举地折断别人的腿，像掰断一根树枝一样，白人们见到他多少都会发怵。但还没来得及听完那两个男孩的讲述，夜行人就来了——”
“Night men!” I echoed in a shrill, dry whisper. Stacey sitting beside me on the floor stiffened: Christopher-John nudged me knowingly: Little Man leaned forward on Papa’s lap.
“夜行人！”我听到了自己的尖叫声。斯泰西在我一旁僵直着身子，克里斯托弗用手肘推了推我，小家伙则害怕得凑近了爸爸。
“David…” Mama started, but Papa enfolded her slender hand in his and said quietly, “These are things they need to hear, baby. It’s their history.”
“大卫…”妈妈有些担心，爸爸握着妈妈的手，语气平静，“孩子们也得知道这些，这是我们的历史。”
“My sisters got kilt in they fire, but my Mama got me out…” His voice faded and he touched the scars on his neck. “She tried to get back into the house to save the girls, but she couldn’t. Them night men was all over her and she threw me — just threw me like I was a ball — hard as she could, trying to get me away from them. Then she fought. Fought like a wild thing right “side my daddy. They was both of them from breeded stock and they was strong like bulls –“
“我的妹妹们被火烧死了。我的妈妈为了救我出来…”他碰了碰脖子上的伤痕，“她想回去把妹妹们救出来，可是她没办法。夜行人团团围着她——她只能用尽全力把抱着的我扔出去，想让我摆脱他们的魔爪。然后，她疯了一样地跟爸爸并肩作战。他们是育种产生的，所以力气很大，像头牛一样…”
Mama sat back, her hand still in Papa’s, her eyes wary. But Mr. Morrison seemed not to notice. “… swept down like locusts.” he continued in a faraway voice. “Burst in on us with their Rebel sabers, hacking and killing, burning us out. Didn’t care who they kilt. We warn’t nothing to them. No better than dogs. Kilt babies and old women. Didn’t matter.” He gazed into the fire.
妈妈的手没有放开，眼神谨慎而紧张。莫里森先生似乎并没有在意，而是继续沉浸在回忆里。“…他们来了，像蝗虫袭击一样。”他的声音显得遥远而恍惚，“他们拿着军刀，烧杀劫掠，无恶不作。他们根本不在意杀了什么，连老人和小孩都不放过。在他们眼里，我们一文不值，连狗都不如。”莫里森先生盯着眼前跳动的炉火。
“Cassie, don’t interrupt Mr. Morrison,” said Mama, but Mr. Morrison turned from the fire and explained. “Well, Cassie, during slavery there was some farms that mated folks like animals to produce more slaves. Breeding slaves brought a lot of money for them slave owners, ‘specially after the government said they couldn’t bring no more slaves from Africa, and they produced all kinds of slaves to sell on the block. And folks with enough money, white men and even free black men could buy ‘zactly what they wanted. My folks was bred for strength like they folks and they grand- folks ‘fore ’em. Didn’t matter none what they thought ’bout the idea. Didn’t nobody care.”
“凯西，别插话。”妈妈说，不过莫里森先生还是转过身来解释道：“凯西，实行奴隶制的时候，有人把奴隶当成是动物一样交配，以便能生产出优质的奴隶。这样的话，那些奴隶的拥有者就会赚更多钱。特别是政府规定严禁从非洲引进奴隶后，他们用这种方式制造出了许多奴隶，用来拍卖。无论是白人，还是解放了的黑人，只要有钱，就可以买下这些奴隶。没人觉得这种方式有什么不妥，也没有人在意。”
“Breeded stock!” I said.”What’s that!”
“育种？什么意思？”我问道。
Uncle Hammer stood also. “Guess I’ll turn in too. It’s near one o’clock.”
哈默大伯也站了起来：“我也该睡了，现在快一点了。”
He grew silent again and no one spoke. Big Ma poked absently at the red-eyed logs with the poker, but no one else stirred.
莫里森先生再次沉寂。奶奶用火棍拨了拨烧得发红的木头，大家一言不发。
Finally Mr. Morrison stood, wished us a good night, and left.
莫里森先生起身，跟我们道了“晚安”，打算离开。
“But my mama and daddy they loved each other and they loved us children, and that Christmas they fought them demons out of hell like avenging angels of the Lord.” He turned back toward the fire and grew very quiet; then he raised his head and looked at us. “They died that night. Them night men kilt ’em, Some folks tell me I can’t remember what happened that Christmas — I warn’t hardly six years old — but I remembers all right. I makes myself remember.”
“我的父母就是这样被制造了出来。但他们真心相爱，也爱我们。那晚，他们就像上帝派来的复仇天使一样与恶魔殊死搏斗。”莫里森先生转头面向炉火，一言不发，过了一会儿，他抬起头，看着我们，“那晚，他们被夜行人杀死了。别人以为我不记得这些了，那时我才不到六岁——但我记得，一辈子都记得。”
Visions of night riders and fire mixed in a caldron of fear awakened me long before dawn.
夜行人、火焰交织在我的梦里，到了夜半，我被吓醒了。
“Wait awhile, Hammer,” said Big Ma. “Now you and David both home, I gotta talk to y’all — ’bout the land…”
“等等，哈默。”奶奶说，“正好你和大卫都在家，我想跟你们说说土地的事…”
Automatically, I rolled to- ward the comforting presence of Big Ma, but she was not beside me.
我下意识地挪向奶奶睡的位置，却发现奶奶不在。
A soft light still crept under the door from Mama and Papa’s room and I immediately hurried toward it. As I opened the door and stepped into the shadowy room, lit now only by the flickering yellow of the low fire, Big Ma was saying, “… y’all start messin’ with these folks down in here, no telling what’ll happen.”
微弱的灯光从爸妈的房间里透出来，我蹑手蹑脚地下床，悄悄打开门，就听到了奶奶的声音：“你又想跟华莱士商店的人对抗了，知道这会有什么后果吗？”
“Is it better to just sit back and complain about how they do us!” Mama snapped, her voice rising. “Everybody from Smellings Creek t4 Strawberry knows it was them but what do we do about it! We line their pockets with our few pennies and send our children up to their store to learn things they’ve got no business learning. The older children are drinking regularly there now, even though they don’t have any money to pay, and the Wallaces are simply adding the liquor charges to the family bill… just more money for them as they ruin our young people. As I see it the least we can do is stop shopping there. It may not be real justice, but it’ll hurt them and we’ll have done something. Mr. Turner and the Averys and the Laniers and over two dozen other families, and perhaps even more, say they’ll think about not shopping there if they can get credit somewhere else. We owe it to the Berrys –“
妈妈提高了音调：“难道我们就只能待在这儿抱怨他们吗？从斯梅林河到斯特罗贝里，所有人都知道他们的恶行。我们仅有的那点钱，进了他们的口袋。我们的小孩去那里尽学些坏东西。还有大些的孩子还到那里赊账喝酒。华莱士商店赚的钱越多，我们的孩子就会变得越糟糕。至少我们可以拒绝买他们的东西，虽然不见得能有什么用，但至少能给他们一点警示。而且，蒙特纳一家、艾弗里一家、拉尼尔一家以及其他二十多家都曾表示，只要他们能在别的地方获得贷款，他们就不会到华莱士商店买东西了。我们欠贝瑞家的——”
“Frankly.” interrupted Uncle Hammer, “I’d rather burn them out myself.”
“真想一把火烧了他们！”哈默大伯插了句。
“Hammer, you go to burning and we’ll have nothing,” Mama retorted.
“哈默，烧了商店，我们什么也得不到。”妈妈反驳道。
“Ain’t gonna have nothing noway.” replied Uncle Hammer. “You think by shopping up at Vicksburg you gonna drive them Wallaces out, then you got no idea of how things work down here. You forgetting Harlan Granger backs that store!”
“你那样做又能得到什么呢？你以为大家去维京伯格买东西就可以把华莱士一家赶出去了？你不了解状况吗？华莱士商店背后有格兰杰家族支持啊。”
“Mary, child, Hammer’s right,” Big Ma said. “I’m doing what I told y’all ’bout this land ’cause I don’t want some legal thing to come up after I’m gone that let that Harlan Granger get this place. But we go backing folks’ credit with our land, we’d lose it sure; and we do that, I couldn’t face Paul Edward –“
“玛丽，哈默说得对。”奶奶说，“我要利用这块土地来解决问题，也不希望我死后还有什么法律纠纷，让格兰杰拿到这块土地。一旦我们拿这块土地给村民办理贷款的话，我们就拿不回土地了，我也无颜见保罗了…”
Papa looked up from the fire. “That may be, honey, but we put up this land to back this thing and it’ll be just like giving it away. Times like they are, it ain’t likely that any of these people can pay the bills they make — as much as they might mean to — and if they can’t pay, where would we be! We’ve got no cash money to pay other folks’ debts.” He shook his head. “No… we’ll have to find another way… Go to Vicks- burg maybe and see what we can arrange –” His eyes fell upon me in the shadows and he leaned forward. “Cassie! What is it, sugar?”
爸爸抬起头，“说是这么说，可一旦我们拿出土地来支持这件事，就相当于把土地捐出去了。现在这年头，要是他们有心还会还钱，要是他们还不了呢？我们欠别人的钱怎么办？”他摇了摇头，“不…我们得想别的法子，或许可以去维京伯格看一看…”爸爸突然看到了我，他起身：“凯西，怎么啦？”
“I didn’t say we should back it,” Mama said, “but we’re just about the only family with any collateral at all.”
“我没有说我们要这么做，”妈妈说，“但我们是唯一拥有土地的人家。”
Papa reached out and softly touched my face in the darkness. “If you remember nothing else in your whole life, Cassie girl, remember this: We ain’t never gonna lose this land. You believe that!”
黑暗中，爸爸摸摸我的脸：“凯西，我希望你记住，我们绝对不会失去那片土地的，记住了吗？”
“Nothin’, Papa,” I mumbled. “I just woke up, that’s all.” Mama started to rise but Papa motioned her down and got up himself.
“没事，爸爸。”我低声说：“我做了个噩梦。”妈妈打算起身，爸爸示意她躺着，自己走了过来。
“Papa,” I said, snuggling under the warm quilts as he tucked them around me, “we gonna lose our land!”
爸爸帮我盖上被子，我窝在温暖的被子里：“爸爸，我们要失去那块土地了吗？”
“Then go to sleep. Christmas is coming.”
“好了，早点睡吧，圣诞节快乐！”
Escorting me back to bed, he said gently, “Got no cause for bad dreams, Cassie girl. Not tonight anyway.”
他把我送回房间，温柔地说：“别想太多了，这样就不会做噩梦了。”
“Yessir, Papa.”
“记住了！爸爸。”
“Man sold me them books told me these two was written by a black man,” Papa said, opening my book and pointing to a picture of a man in a long, fancy coat and a wigful of curly hair that fell to his shoulders. “Name of Alexander Dumas, a French fellow. His daddy was a mulatto and his grand mama was a slave down on one of them islands — Martinique, it says here. Man said to me, they right hard reading for children, but I told him he didn’t know my babies. They can’t read ’em now, I said, they’ll grow into ’em.”
“卖书的人说，这本书是一个黑人写的。”爸爸一边解释，一边翻开我的书，指着作者的照片。那人穿着华丽的长外套，有一头假发一样的披肩长发。爸爸接着说：“作者叫亚历山大·仲马，是个法国人。书里说，他的父亲是第一代黑人白人混血儿，他的祖母是马提尼克岛上的奴隶。卖书的人还跟我说，这本书小孩子读起来可能有点难懂。但我跟他说，你不了解我的孩子们，即使他们现在不懂，但他们总会明白的。”
“Books!” cried Little Man on Christmas morning.
一大早，我就听到小家伙和克里斯托弗惊喜地尖叫，“书！礼物是书！”
For Stacey there was The Count of Monte Cristo; for me. The Three Musketeers: and for Christopher-John and Little Man, two different volumes of Aesop’s Fables. On the inside cover of each book in Mama’s fine hand was written the name of the owner. Mine read: “This book is the property of Miss Cassie Deborah Logan. Christmas, 1933.”
斯泰西得到一本《蒙特·克里斯托弗伯爵》（The Count of Monte Cristo），我的是《三个火枪手》（The Three Musketeers）。小家伙和克里斯托弗各自拿到一本不同的《伊索寓言》（Aeso‘s Fables）。在每本书的内页，妈妈都写上了我们的名字。我的书上写着：这本书是属于凯西·洛根小姐的，1933年圣诞节。
After the church services, the Averys returned home with us for Christmas dinner. All eight of the Avery children, including the four pre-schoolers, crowded into the kitchen with the boys and me, smelling the delicious aromas and awaiting the call to eat. But only the eldest girls, who were helping Mama, Big Ma, and Mrs. Avery prepare the finishing touches to the meal, were allowed to remain. The rest of us were continuously being shooed out by Big Ma. Finally, the announcement we were all waiting for was made and we were allowed to begin the Christmas feast.
结束教堂礼拜后，艾弗里一家到我们家来和我们一块儿吃圣诞晚餐。艾弗里家有八个小孩，四个还没上学。闻着食物的香气，孩子们都聚到厨房，急切地等着开饭。只有较大的女孩被允许留下来帮忙，其他孩子都被奶奶叫出了厨房。
In addition to the books there was a sockful of once-a- year store-bought licorice, oranges, and bananas for each of us and from Uncle Hammer a dress and a sweater for me, and a sweater and a pair of pants each for Christopher-John and Little man. But nothing compared to the books. Little Man, who treasured clothes above all else, carefully laid his new pants and sweater aside and dashed for a clean sheet of brown paper to make a cover for his book, and through- out the day as he lay upon the deerskin rug looking at the bright, shining pictures of faraway places, turning each page as if it were gold, he would suddenly squint down at his hands, glance at the page he had just turned, then dash into the kitchen to wash again — just to make sure.
除了书之外，我们还收获了满袜子的甘草、橘子和香蕉。哈默大伯送给我一条裙子和一件毛衣，克里斯托弗和小家伙则各自收获了一件毛衣和一条长裤，不过这些都抵不上书带给我们的满足。本来就爱书如命的小家伙，小心翼翼地把新衣服放在一旁，用一张干净的棕色包装纸做了书套，然后一整天就坐在地毯上，专心致志地看着书上的漂亮图案。每翻一页，他都像摸到金子一样，眯起眼睛看着自己的手，然后再看一看自己刚刚翻过的书，好像在确认，这是不是在做梦。
The meal lasted for over two hours through firsts, seconds, and thirds, talk and laughter, and finally dessert. When we were finished the boys and I, with Claude and T. J., went outside, but the half-inch layer of snow made everything sloppy, so we went back in and joined the adults by the fire.
晚饭吃了两个多小时。菜一道接着一道上，大家边吃边聊边开怀地笑。吃完正餐和甜点后，我和男孩们，还有克劳德以及提杰走到屋外，地上的积雪已经有半英寸厚了，走起来很容易滑倒，我们就进了屋里，和大人们一块儿坐在火炉旁。
Jeremy nodded and stepped hesitantly inside. As Stacey motioned him toward the fire, Uncle Hammer’s eyes narrowed, and he said to Papa, “He looks like a Simms.”
杰里米点点头，犹犹豫豫地走了进来。斯泰西把他带到火炉边。哈默大伯眯起眼睛，对爸爸说：“他长得很像西蒙家的人。”
Shortly afterward, there was a timid knock on the front door. Stacey opened the door and found Jeremy Simms standing there looking frozen and very frightened as he peered into the bright room. Everyone turned to stare at him. Stacey glanced around at Papa, then back at Jeremy, “You — you wanna come in!” he asked awkwardly.
过了一会儿，门外响起敲门声。斯泰西开了门，是杰里米。他瑟瑟发抖，怯怯地望向屋里。所有人都转头看着他，斯泰西看看爸爸，又看看杰里米，有些局促地问：“你…你要进来吗？”
“Let me handle it.” Papa said.
“我来解决。”爸爸说。
“Then what the devil –“
“那他怎么——”
“I believe he is,” agreed Papa.
“是的。”
Jeremy, who had heard, flushed a deep red and quickly handed Mama a small burlap bag. “I — I brung them for y’all.” Mama took the bag. As she opened it, I peeped over her shoulder: the bag was full of nuts.
杰里米一听，脸都涨红了。他迅速把一个小粗布袋递给妈妈：“我是特地拿这个来给你们的。”妈妈打开袋子，我越过她的肩膀，看到一袋子坚果。
“Nuts!” I questioned. “Nuts! Why we got more nuts now than we know what –“
“坚果？”我问道，“坚果！为什么给我们这么多坚果？明明我们——”
Stacey looked at Papa to see if he should take it. For a long moment Papa studied Jeremy, then he nodded. “It — it ain’t much,” stammered Jeremy as Stacey tore off the wrapping. “M-made it myself.” Stacey slid his fingers down the smooth, sanded back of the wooden flute. “Go ‘head and try it,” said a pleased Jeremy. “It blows real nice.”
斯泰西看着爸爸，不知道要不要收下。爸爸看了杰里米好一会儿，然后点点头。当斯泰西拆开包装纸时，杰里米小声说：“这是我做的。”斯泰西的手指从木制笛子上滑过，杰里米很高兴：“快，吹吹看，声音很好听呢。”
Jeremy nodded slightly as if he did not know how to accept her thanks, and stiffly handed a slender, paper- wrapped object to Stacey. “Made this for ya,” he said.
杰里米害羞地点点头，对妈妈的道谢感到很不好意思。然后他动作僵硬地递给斯泰西一个用纸包起来的细长的东西：“这是送给你的。”
“Cassie!” Mama scowled. “What have I told you about that mouth of yours!” Then she turned to Jeremy. “This is very thoughtful of you, Jeremy, and we appreciate them. Thank you.”
“凯西！”妈妈打断我，“别问东问西的。”她转身对杰里米说，“杰里米，你想的真周到。我们很喜欢，谢谢。”
When Jeremy did not move, Papa asked, “You Charlie Simms’s boy!”
杰里米没动。爸爸问：“你是西蒙家的孩子吗？”
Again Stacey looked at Papa, but this time Papa gave him no indication what he should do. “Thanks, Jeremy, it’s real nice,” he said finally. Then, flute in hand, he stood uncomfortably by the door waiting for Jeremy to leave.
斯泰西又看向爸爸，这回爸爸没有给他任何指示。斯泰西挠了挠头：“谢谢你，杰里米，这真的很棒。”他拿着木笛，不自然地站在房门旁，等杰里米离开。
I watched Stacey closely to see if he was going to allow himself to be goaded to T. J.; he was not. “Ah, stuff it, T. J.” he ordered.
斯泰西死死地盯着提杰，我在想他会不会忍下去，但他没有。“你给我闭嘴！”斯泰西大喊道。
T. J. made no comment on Jeremy’s visit until both Papa and Uncle Hammer had left the room. He was afraid of Papa and downright terrified of Uncle Hammer, so he never had much to say when either was around, but now that they had gone outside with Mr. Avery, he said, “You ain’t gonna keep that thing, are you!”
提杰很怵爸爸和哈默大伯，只要他们有其中一人在场，他就不敢乱说话。当爸爸和哈默大伯跟着艾弗里先生出去后，他一脸不屑地对斯泰西说：“你不会是要留着那玩意儿吧？”
“Then I expect you’d better be getting on home, son, ‘fore he come looking for you.”
“孩子，我想，你还是在他出来找你之前赶快回家吧。”
Jeremy nodded. Y-yessir.
杰里米点点头。
Jeremy looked back and smiled shyly. “Merry Christmas to y’all too.”
杰里米回过头，害羞地笑了：“也祝你们圣诞快乐！”
“Yessir,” said Jeremy, backing away.
杰里米后退了几步：“好的。”
“Your daddy know you here!”
“你爸爸不知道你来这里？”
Stacey looked malevolently at r. J. and I knew that he was thinking of the coat. “Yeah. I’m gonna keep it. Why?”
斯泰西意味深长地看着提杰，我知道他想起了外套的事：“我打算留着它，怎么了？”
T. J. shrugged. “Nothin’. ‘Ceptin’ i sure wouldn’t want no whistle some ole white boy been blowin’ on.”
提杰耸耸肩：“没什么，我可不想要白人送的任何东西。”
Jeremy bit his lower lip, and looked at his feet. “N-no sir, I reckon not.”
杰里米咬了咬嘴唇，低头看着脚面：“我想他不知道。”
As he reached the door, I cried after him, “Merry Christmas, Jeremy!”
当他走到门边时，我在他身后喊道：“杰里米，圣诞快乐！”
“No.” Papa said carefully. “That ain’t wrong.”
“没有，这没有错。”爸爸很谨慎地回答。
“Well… not really. I mean… he’s a crazy kid and he likes to walk to school with us, but –“
“嗯…这个…或许吧。他很奇怪，总是跟着我们去上学，不过…”
“You like him!”
“你喜欢他吗？”
“Maybe you did give him something,” said Papa, lighting his pipe.
“或许你是给了。”爸爸点燃了烟斗。
“Ah. man, don’t get me wrong.” said T. J. quickly. “You wanna keep the ole thing, it’s up to you. But for me, some- body give me something, I want it to be something fine — like that pretty little pearl-handled pistol…”
“嘿，别那么紧张兮兮的，我可没说错什么。”提杰语速飞快，“你留不留着那支笛子，是你的自由。不过对我来说，要是有人送我东西，我希望是最好的——比如送我一把有着珍珠手柄的手枪。”
Stacey frowned, thinking. “I told him I didn’t want him walking with us, but he keeps on anyway and the white kids laugh at him ’cause he do. But he don’t seem to let it bother him none… I s’pose I like him all right. Is that wrong?”
斯泰西皱着眉头，陷入思考：“我跟他说了，我一点儿也不喜欢他跟着我们，但他依然我行我素。白人小孩都因此嘲笑他，但他似乎并不在意这些…我觉得，我可能是喜欢他吧，但这有什么错呢？”
“Not even your friendship!”
“连友情也没有？”
When the Averys had left. Stacey asked, “Papa, how come Jeremy give me this flute! I mean, I didn’t give him nothin’.”
艾弗里一家离开后，斯泰西问爸爸：“爸爸，杰里米为什么送我笛子呢？我的意思是，我从来没给过他任何东西呀。”
“No sir, Papa. I ain’t never given him nothin’!”
“没有，爸爸。我没有给过他任何东西。”斯泰西很肯定。
Actually, he’s much easier to get along with than T. J., Stacey went on. “And I s’pose if I let him, he could be a better friend than T. J.”
“事实上，他比提杰好相处多了。”斯泰西说，“要是我愿意，他可能是个比提杰还好的朋友。”
Papa took the pipe from his mouth, rubbed his moustache and spoke quietly. “Far as I’m concerned, friendship between black and white don’t mean that much ’cause it usually ain’t on a equal basis. Right now you and Jeremy might get along fine, but in a few years he’ll think of himself as a man but you’ll probably still be a boy to him. And if he feels that way, he’ll turn on you in a minute.”
爸爸把烟斗从嘴里拿出来，摸了摸胡子，认真地说：“在我看来，黑人和白人之间是不存在所谓的友谊的，因为它通常并不建立在平等的基础上。现在你和杰里米相处得还不错，但是再过几年，当他意识到自己是个大人，对他而言你依然是个小孩时，他可能马上就会背叛你了。”
On my way to bed, I stopped by the boys’ room to retrieve an orange Christopher-John had swiped from my stocking and spied Stacey fingering the flute. As I stood in the doorway, he lingered over it, then, carefully rewrapping it, placed it in his box of treasured things. I never saw the flute again.
上床睡觉前，我先去男孩们的房间要回克里斯托弗偷偷从我的圣诞袜里拿走的橘子。我悄悄看了一眼斯泰西，他正在用手指摩挲着笛子。当我走到门边时，看到他端详了它一小会儿，然后小心翼翼地将它放到了他的宝物箱里。从此，我再也没有见过那支笛子。
“Papa’s eyes narrowed and his resemblance to Uncle Hammer increased. “We Logans don’t have much to do with white folks. You know why! ‘Cause white folks mean trouble. You see blacks hanging ’round with whites, they’re headed for trouble. Maybe one day whites and blacks can be real friends, but right now the country ain’t built that way. Now you could be right’bout Jeremy making a much finer friend than T. J. ever will be. The trouble is, down here in Mississippi, it costs too much to find out… So I think you’d better not try.”
爸爸的眼睛眯成一条缝，看起来越发像哈默大伯了：“我们洛根家向来不跟白人交往。你知道为什么吗？因为白人意味着灾难。那些跟白人走得近的黑人，最终都没什么好下场。或许有一天，白人和黑人可以变成很好的朋友，但在此时此地，这是一件没有可能的事情。或许你现在想着，杰里米会是个比提杰更好的朋友。然而你最终会发现…我劝你还是打消这个念头吧。”
The day after Christmas Papa summoned Stacey, Christopher-John, Little Man, and me into the barn. We had hoped against hope that Mama would not tell him about our trip to the Wallace store or, if she did, that he would forget what he had promised. We should have known better. Mama always told Papa everything, and Papa never forgot anything.
圣诞节后的第一天，爸爸把我和男孩们叫到了谷仓里。我们真希望妈妈没有把我们去华莱士商店的事情告诉爸爸，也满心希望爸爸听了之后，会很快忘记这件事。可现实哪里有我们想象的那么美好，妈妈总是把所有事都告诉爸爸，而爸爸总是会把每一件事都记得清清楚楚。
“But Papa, I don’t think Jeremy’d be that way.”
“不，爸爸，我觉得杰里米不会这样。”
Stacey looked full into Papa’s face and read his meaning.
斯泰西盯着爸爸，想要读懂他的意思。
In the late afternoon, shortly after the men had returned, Mr. Jamison arrived. He brought with him a fruit cake sent by Mrs. Jamison and a bag of lemon drops for each of the boys and me. Mama allowed us to say our thanks, then sent us outside. We played for a while in the patches of snow that remained, but when that grew tiresome, I popped into the house to see what was happening; Mama ordered me to pop back out again.
傍晚，在爸爸他们回来后不久，杰米森先生来拜访了。他带了杰米森太太做的水果蛋糕，给我们每个小孩儿都发了一袋柠檬糖果。妈妈让我们道了谢，就把我们赶到屋外头了。我们玩了一会儿雪，很快就觉得有点腻烦了。我偷偷溜进屋里，想知道他们在谈些什么，结果又被妈妈赶出来了。
They’ve got some business to attend to, she said shortly. “Come on now, get busy. We’ve got chores to do.”
“他们有事情要处理。”妈妈说得很简短，“孩子们，过来帮忙，还有好多事情要做呢。”
After we had received our punishment, we emerged sore and teary-eyed and watched Papa, Uncle Hammer, and Mr. Morrison climb into the Packard and speed away. Mama said they were going to Vicksburg.
我们受完惩罚，眼泪汪汪地看着爸爸、哈默大伯、莫里森先生坐上哈默大伯的车离开。妈妈说他们是去维京伯格。
“What kind of papers!” asked Stacey.
“什么文件？”斯泰西问。
I shrugged. “I dunno. But Mr. Jamison was saying something ’bout selling the land.”
我耸耸肩：“我也不清楚，不过，杰米森先生说到了卖地的事情。”
“Why Vicksburg, Mama!” asked Stacey.
“妈妈，他们为什么去维京伯格啊？”斯泰西问。
“What they doing!” asked Little Man.
“他们在干吗？”小家伙问。
“Selling the land!” questioned Stacey.”You sure!”
“卖地？”斯泰西有些惊讶，“你确定？”
“Looking at a whole bunch of papers,” I said. “And Uncle Hammer was signing something.”
“看一大堆文件。”我说，“哈默大伯好像在文件上签字了。”
Mr. Jamison nodded. He was a long, thin man in his mid- fifties with a perfect laywer face, so placid that it was difficult to guess what thoughts lay behind it.
杰米森先生点点头。他又高又瘦，五十岁出头，长着一张完美的律师脸。他的表情平静到你都猜不出他究竟在想些什么。
I shrugged again. “Papa and Uncle Hammer, I guess.”
我又耸耸肩，回答道：“大概是爸爸和哈默大伯吧。”
“Both of who?”
“哪两个人？”
After a while it grew chilly and we went inside. Mr. Jamison, sitting next to Big Ma, was putting some papers into his briefcase. “I hope you feel better now that that’s Bone, Miz Caroline,” he said, his voice a soft mixture of Southern aristocracy and Northern schooling.
过了一会儿，外头变冷了，我们回到屋里。杰米森先生坐在奶奶旁边，把一些文件放进他的公文包里：“一切都搞定了，希望你能心安一些，卡罗琳女士。”他的腔调带着北方知识分子和南方贵族的味道。
I nodded. “He said: Y’all sign them papers and Miz Caroline got no more legal right to this land. Can’t sell it, can’t sign on it. It’ll be in y’all’s name and it’ll take both of y’all to do anything with it.”
我点点头：“杰米森先生说，你们俩签署了这份文件，意味着在法律上卡罗琳女士不再拥有对这片土地的所有权。这片土地将在你们的名下，你们可以做任何事。”
“Hammer and David, they been takin’ care of things a long time now,” Big Ma said. “Them and Mary works hard to pay the taxes and mortgage on this here place and I been wantin’ to make sure while I’m still breathin’ that they gets title to this place under the law without no trouble. I ain’t wantin’ a whole lot of problems after I’m gone ’bout who gots rights to this land.” She paused a moment, then added, “That happens sometimes, you know.”
“哈默和大卫一直以来都照料着这片土地，他们和玛丽辛苦劳作，偿清利息和贷款。在我还能呼吸的时候，我希望这片土地能划到他们名下，不产生任何的法律纠纷。我不想到我死后，出现什么麻烦，让别人把这片土地夺了去。”她顿了一下，接着说：“你知道，这种事也不是不可能。”
“There’s talk that some of the people around here are looking to shop in Vicksburg,” he said.
“我听说最近有人想在维京伯格买东西。”
“There’s talk too why folks are looking to shop there.” He paused, met Papa’s eyes, then Uncle Hammer’s, and went on. “As you know, my family has roots in Vicksburg — we’ve a number of friends there still. I got a call from one of them this morning. Said you were looking to find credit for about thirty families.”
“我还听说了他们想在维京伯格买东西的原因。”他的眼神触碰到爸爸和哈默大伯，“你们知道，我老家在维京伯格，那里也有很多我的朋友。今天早上我接到一个朋友的电话，说你们在给三十多户人家找贷款。”
The boys and I sat down silently at the study table, and the silence allowed us to stay. I figured that Mr. Jamison would be leaving now. His business was evidently finished and despite the fact that the family thought well of him, he was not considered a friend in the usual sense, and there seemed no reason for him to stay longer. But now Mr. Jamison put his briefcase back on the floor, indicating that he was not leaving, and looked first at Big Ma and Mama, then across at Papa and Uncle Hammer.
我和男孩们安静地坐在书桌旁，大概是因为我们没说话，所以能留在那儿。我猜杰米森先生要离开了。虽然我们一家都对他颇有好感，但他也算不上是我们的朋友，所以没什么久留的理由。但杰米森先生把公文包放在地上，先看了看奶奶和妈妈，接着将目光投向了爸爸和哈默大伯。
Big Ma looked around at Papa and Uncle Hammer, but neither of them acknowledged her glance; their eyes were pinned on Mr. Jamison.
奶奶用眼神示意爸爸和哈默大伯谨慎说话，不过他们都盯着杰米森先生，没有看到奶奶的暗示。
Papa and Uncle Hammer neither affirmed nor denied this. “You know as well as I do that credit doesn’t come easy these days.” continued Mr. Jamison. “You expect to get any, you’ll need something to back it.”
爸爸和哈默大伯没有承认，也没有否认。“我们都清楚，这些日子，要找到贷款并不容易。”杰米森先生接着说，“你们期望得到贷款，就得拿东西担保。”
Mr. Jamison glanced at Uncle Hammer and nodded. “I reckoned you did. But as far as I can see, the only thing any of you got to back that credit with is this land… and I’d hate to see you put it up.”
杰米森先生看向哈默大伯，点了点头：“我想你们是清楚的，但你们唯一能拿出来担保的东西，只有这块土地…而且，我并不乐意你们把这块土地拿出来。”
“I reckon we know that,” said Uncle Hammer.
“我们都知道。”哈默大伯说。
“Because you’d lose it.”
“因为你们会失去它。”
“Why’s that!” asked Uncle Hammer, wary of his interest.
“为什么？”哈默大伯流露出一丝兴趣。
The fire popped and the room grew silent. Then Papa said, “What you getting at!”
火焰“砰”地响了一声，屋里复归平静。爸爸问：“你到底想做什么？”
Again, silence. Mr. Jamison allowed Papa and Uncle Hammer several moments to search for a motive behind his mask like face. “I’m a Southerner, born and bred, but that doesn’t mean I approve of all that goes on here, and there are a lot of other white people who feel the same.”
再一次，屋里一片沉默。爸爸和哈默大伯盯着杰米森先生好一会儿，想找出他面具般的脸下究竟藏了怎样的心思。他说：“我是个土生土长的南方人，但这并不意味着我赞同这里发生的一切，不少白人也跟我抱有同样的看法。”
“I’ll back the credit.”
“我来支持这项贷款。”
“If you and so many others feel that way.” said Uncle Hammer with a wry sneer, “then how come them Wallaces ain’t in jail!”
“要是那么多白人都这么想，”哈默大伯撇撇嘴，冷笑着，“那华莱士一家怎么没去坐牢？”
“Because,” answered Mr. Jamison candidly, “there aren’t enough of those same white people who would admit how they feel, or even if they did, would hang a white man for killing a black one. It’s as simple as that.”
“因为，”杰米森先生直率而坦白，“因为大多数白人都不敢承认他们内心的真实感受。就算他们说出来了，也不可能为了杀了一个黑人而赔上一条白人的命。这样简单的事情，你们也应该知道。”
Uncle Hammer smiled slightly and shook his head, but his eyes showed a grudging respect for Mr. Jamison.
哈默大伯轻轻地笑了笑，摇了摇头，不过他的眼神里流露出一丝对杰米森先生的敬佩。
“Hammer –” Big Ma started.
“哈默！”奶奶制止道。
“Backing the loan will be strictly a business matter. In the fall when the crops are in, those people who’ve bought the goods in Vicksburg will have to pay for them. If they don’t, then I’ll have to. Of course, as a businessman. I’m hoping that I won’t have to put out a penny — my own cash box isn’t exactly overflowing — so there’ll have to be a credit limit. Still, it would lend me a great deal of satisfaction to know that I was a part of all this.” He looked around, “What do you think!”
“支持贷款对我来说是生意事。到了秋天农作物收获后，在维京伯格购物的人家就要偿清贷款。如果他们无法偿还的话，我就得付钱。当然，作为一个生意人，我希望自己不用出一分钱，而且，我的钱也并没有那么多，所以即使贷款的话也会有个限额。如果我能参与到这件事中，我将感激不尽。”
“You know it ain’t hardly likely,” Papa said, “that after accounts are figured, there’ll be any money to pay any debts at all, except those up at that Wallace store.”
爸爸说：“那种事情是极少发生的，只要到了结账的时候，他们会偿清贷款的。”
Mr. Jamison nodded knowingly. “But the offer still stands.”
杰米森先生会意地点点头。“但这个提议仍然有效。”
Papa inhaled deeply. “Well, then, I’d say it’s up to those people who’d be buying on your signature. They want to do it, then we got no say in it. We always pay cash.”
爸爸深深吸了口气：“嗯，这还要看以你的名义担保的人家答不答应，如果他们同意了，我们就无所谓。我们一向是付现金的。”
“You know if you sign that credit,” said Uncle Hammer, “you won’t be the most popular man down in here. You thought about that!”
哈默大伯说：“你想过吗？这样的话，你就成为这里最不受欢迎的人了。”
I wanted to ask what Mr. Granger had to do with anything, but common sense told me that I would only earn eviction by asking. But then Mr. Jamison went on and explained without any prodding from me.
我本想问问格兰杰先生会怎么做，不过我觉得要是我一发问，准会被赶出去。可杰米森先生接下来的话满足了我心里的疑问。
“Ever since we were boys, Harlan’s lived in the past. His grandmother filled him with all kinds of tales about the glory of the South before the war. You know, back then the Grangers had one of the biggest plantations in the state and Spokane County practically belonged to them… and they thought it did too. They were consulted about everything concerning this area and they felt it was up to them to see that things worked smoothly, according to the law — a law basically for whites. Well, Harlan feels the same now as his grandmother did back then. He also feels strongly about this land and he resents the fact that you won’t sell it back to him. You back the credit with it now and he’ll seize this opportunity to take it away from you. You can count on it.”
“格兰杰一直活在过去。他的祖母在他的脑海里灌输了许多战前南方的辉煌事迹。那时，格兰杰家是全国最大的农场之一，整个斯波坎几乎都属于他们。他们还以为，他们是这个地方的领袖，有权掌管一切事务。格兰杰的想法和他的祖母是一样的，他对这块土地有很深的情感，所以恨你们不把土地卖给他。如果你们拿出这块土地去支持贷款的话，他正好可以借机把这块土地弄到手，这万万不能的呀。”
“Yes,” said Mr. Jamison thoughtfully, “my wife and I discussed it fully. We realize what could happen… But I’m just wondering if you do. Besides the fact that a number of white folks around here resent this land you’ve got and your independent attitude, there’s Harlan Granger. Now I’ve known Harlan all my life, and he’s not going to like this.”
“是的。”杰米森先生说，“我和我太太认真讨论过这个问题。我们知道会发生什么…但我更担心你们要是支持其他人贷款了，你们手里的那块土地…你们特立独行的行事方式，已经让周围的不少白人看不惯了，特别是格兰杰。我太了解他了，他最受不了这样的事情。”
“But even more important than all that, you’re pointing a finger right at the Wallaces with this boycott business. You’re not only accusing them of murder, which in this case would be only a minor consideration because the man killed was black, but you’re saying they should be punished for it. That they should be punished just as if they had killed a white man, and punishment of a white man for a wrong done to a black man would denote equality. Now that is what Harlan Granger absolutely will not permit.”
“而且，更重要的是，你们想对华莱士一家进行杀人指控，并通过行动来抗议华莱士一家。你们觉得，杀了人就得受到惩罚；但是对他们而言，杀死一个黑人根本不算什么。而且格兰杰是不会允许这样的事情发生的。”
He paused, and when he spoke again his voice had grown so quiet I had to lean forward to hear his next words. “And if you continue to encourage people not to shop at the Wallace store, you could still lose it. Don’t forget that Harlan leases that store land to the Wallaces and gets a hefty percentage of its revenue. Before he let the Wallaces set up storekeeping, he was only getting his sharecropper’s money. Now he gets a nice bit of Montier’s and Harrison’s share- cropper’s money too since both of those plantations are too small to have a store, and he’s not hardly going to stand for your interfering with it.”
他顿了一下，声音变得平静了：“而且，你们如果继续鼓励居民不去华莱士商店买东西，你们也会失去这块土地。别忘了，格兰杰把商店借给了华莱士，所以商店的大部分利润都流进了格兰杰的口袋。在他让华莱士开店之前，他只能向他的佃农收租。现在，他还有蒙泰尔和哈里森两户佃农的钱，因为这两户人家地太小，不足以开店。所以，他更不能让你们来破坏他的好事。”
“I do hope that’s so, David,” murmured Mr. Jamison going to the door. “I truly hope that’s so.”
“我希望如此。”杰米森先生走向门外，“我说真的。”
Mr. Jamison was silent, waiting; no one else spoke and he went on again. “What John Henry Berry and his brother were accused of — making advances to a white woman — goes against the grain of Harlan Granger and most other white folks in this community more than anything else, you know that. Harlan may not believe in the methods of the Wallaces, but he’ll definitely support them. Believe me on that.”
杰米森先生停下来，等着大家说些什么，但没人开口，于是他继续说了下去：“约翰·贝瑞和他兄弟被指控冒犯白人妇女，只是因为这里的白人地位高贵得多。格兰杰或许并不赞同华莱士一家的行为，但他依然会全力支持他们。”
In the days that followed Mr. Jamison’s visit, Papa, Mama, and Uncle Hammer went to the houses of those families who were considering shopping in Vicksburg. On the fourth day Papa and Uncle Hammer again went to Vicksburg, but this time in the wagon with Mr. Morrison. Their journey took two days and when they returned, the wagon was loaded with store-bought goods.
那天，杰米森先生离开后，爸爸妈妈，还有哈默大伯就去找那些想要在维京伯格买东西的人商量。到了第四天，爸爸和哈默大伯前往维京伯格，不过这次他们是和莫里森先生一块儿乘着马车去的。两天后，他们才回来，车上装满了商店里的货物。
Papa looked down at the boys and me awaiting his reply, then nodded slightly, as if he agreed. “Still,” he said, “I want these children to know we tried, and what we can’t do now, maybe one day they will.”
爸爸看着我们，轻轻点了点头：“是的。不过，我仍然要我的孩子们知道，我们曾经努力过，就算现在不成功，总有一天，他们会成功的。”
Mr. Jamison picked up his briefcase, ran his fingers through his graying hair, and met Papa’s eyes. “The sad thing is, you know in the end you can’t beat him or the Wallaces.”
杰米森先生拿起公文包，用手捋了捋灰色头发，然后看着爸爸：“我担心，你们到头来，还是无法打败格兰杰与华莱士。”
“What’s all that!” I asked Papa as he jumped from the wagon. “That for us!”
“这些都是什么？”爸爸跳下马车，我向他发问，“是给我们的吗？”
Hastily Christopher-John and I tugged on the well rope, pulled up the water tub, and poured the water into the bucket. Each of us gripping a side of the heavy bucket, we hurried to the back porch where we deposited it, then tip- toed silently through the empty kitchen to the door leading to Mama and Papa’s room. Little Man and Stacey, just leaving the room under Mama’s orders, allowed the door to remain slightly cracked, and all four of us huddled against it stepladder fashion.
我和克里斯托弗奋力拉着绳子，把水倒进水桶里，然后两人拎着沉甸甸的水桶抬到后廊，蹑手蹑脚地穿过空无一人的厨房，走到通往爸爸妈妈房间的门前。小家伙和斯泰西刚被妈妈从房间里赶出来，他们偷偷给门留了一小条缝隙，我们四个就紧紧靠在一起，偷偷听着。
“No, Cassie girl. It’s things folks ordered from Vicksburg.”
“不，凯西宝贝，这是居民们在维京伯格订的东西。”
I wanted to ask more questions about the trip, but Papa seemed in a hurry to be off again and my questions went unanswered until the following day, when Mr. Granger arrived. Christopher-John and I were drawing water from the well when the silver Packard glided to a smooth stop in the drive and Mr. Granger stepped out. He stared sour-faced at Uncle Hammer’s Packard in the barn, then opened the gate to the front yard and stepped briskly across the lawn to the house.
我本来想向爸爸询问更多细节，不过爸爸看上去似乎很忙碌，我也就没开口。到了第二天，格兰杰先生来到我们家。我和克里斯托弗那时正在水井旁汲水，格兰杰先生下了车，瞥了一眼谷仓里哈默大伯的车，然后打开前院大门，穿过草坪，走向屋里。
Mr. Granger studied Uncle Hammer. Uncle Hammer wore, as he had every day since he had arrived, sharply creased pants, a vest over a snow-white shirt, and shoes that shone like midnight. “You right citified, ain’t you! Course you always did think you was too good to work in the fields like other folks.”
格兰杰先生开始仔细打量着哈默大伯。哈默大伯自打来的那天起，就穿着褶子裤，雪白的衬衫外，套了一件小背心，一双皮鞋锃光发亮。“你倒是挺时髦的，哈？不过，你向来自命不凡，不屑于跟别人一块儿下田工作。”
“You sure giving folks something to talk ’bout with that car of yours, Hammer,” Mr. Granger said in his folksy dialect as he sat down with a grunt across from Papa. In spite of his college education he always spoke this way. “What they got you doing up North! Bootlegging whiskey!” He laughed dryly. indicating that the question was to be taken lightly, but his eyes tight on Uncle Hammer showed that he in- tended to have an answer.
“你的车子可是惹了不少闲话呀，哈默。”格兰杰先生吸了吸鼻子，用浓重的口音说道。虽然他受过大学教育，可还是改不掉这腔调。“他们让你在北方都干了些什么？偷运威士忌？”他讪笑着，似乎想让这个话题快点过去，可眼睛却死盯着哈默大伯。
“Naw, that ain’t it.” said Uncle Hammer. “I just ain’t never figured fifty cents a day was worth a child’s time, let alone a man’s wages.” Uncle Hammer said nothing else; he didn’t need to. Everyone knew that fifty cents was the top price paid to any day laborer, man, woman, or child, hired to work in the Granger fields.
“不，我只是觉得，一天五十五美分的工资，简直是在剥削孩子们，更别说是大人们了。”哈默大伯没再继续说下去，但大家心知肚明。在格兰杰的农场工作，无论男女老少，一天最多只有五十五美分的工钱。
Uncle Hammer, leaning against the fireplace mantel, did not laugh. “Don’t need to bootleg,” he said sullenly. “Up there I got me a man’s job and they pay me a man’s wages for it.”
哈默大伯倚靠着壁炉，一言不发。“用不着走私。”他有些愠怒，“他们给了我一份不错的工作，薪水还行。”
Mr. Granger shook his head. “Seems to me you folks are just stirring up something. Y’all got roots in this community. Even got yourselves that loan Paul Edward made from the First National Bank up in Strawberry for that eastern two hundred acres. Course now with times like they are. that mortgage could come due anytime…, and if it comes due and y’all ain’t got the money to pay it, y’all could lose this place.”
格兰杰先生摇摇头：“你们这帮人，是想没事找事惹麻烦吧！以前你爸爸向斯特罗贝里的第一国家银行借款，买了东边那两百英亩土地。现在算算看，快到还清贷款的时候了吧…要是到时候你们付不起这笔钱，你们可就要失去这片土地了。”
Mr. Granger ran his tongue around his teeth, making his lips protrude in odd half circles, then he turned from Uncle Hammer to Papa. “Some folks tell me y’all running a regular traveling store up here. How tell a fellow can get just ’bout anything he wants from up at Tate’s in Vicksburg if he just lets y’all know.”
格兰杰先生的舌头在嘴里打着转，卷成了奇怪的半圆形。他转向爸爸：“有些人跟我说，你定期从维京伯格往这儿运送商品，只要他们跟你说一声，就可以买到维京伯格商店里的东西。”
“Ain’t gonna lose it.” said Uncle Hammer flatly.
“我们不会的。”哈默大伯语气平静。
Papa met Mr. Granger’s eyes, but did not speak,
爸爸望向格兰杰先生，但没有说话。
Mr. Granger glanced up at Uncle Hammer, then back to Papa. He took a cigar from his pocket, then a knife to cut off the tip. After he had thrown the tip into the fire, he settled back in his chair and lit the cigar while Papa, Mama, Uncle Hammer, and Big Ma waited for him to get on. Then he said : “This is a fine community. Got fine folks in it — both white and colored. Whatever’s bothering you people, y’all just tell me. We’ll get it straightened out without all this big to-do.”
格兰杰先生瞥了一眼哈默大伯，又看向爸爸。他从口袋里掏出一支雪茄，用小刀切掉顶端，然后把顶端部分丢进火炉里。他坐回椅子，点燃雪茄，接着说道：“这是个不错的社区。居民们也很不错——无论是白人，还是黑人。要是你们遇到了什么困难，大可说给我听，犯不着闹这么大的动静。”
“Neither does burning.” said Uncle Hammer.
“放火也不睦邻吧？”哈默大伯反击道。
Uncle Hammer laughed outright. Mr. Granger looked up sharply, but Uncle Hammer eyed him insolently, a smile still on his lips. Mr. Granger, watching him, cautioned sternly. “I don’t like trouble here. This is a quiet and peaceful place… I aim to see it stays that way.” Turning back to Papa, he continued. “Whatever problems we have, we can work them out. I ain’t gonna hide that I think y’all making a big mistake, both for the community and for yourselves, going all the way down to Vicksburg to do your shopping. That don’t seem very neighborly –“
哈默大伯直率地笑了出来。格兰杰先生瞪了哈默大伯一眼，哈默大伯也回瞪了他，嘴角的笑依然挂着。格兰杰先生硬了硬口气：“我不喜欢看到麻烦事发生，这是个平静而和谐的地方。我希望它一直保持这个样子，无论发生什么问题，都可以想出办法解决。坦白说，我觉得你们在犯大错，无论是对整个社区，还是对你们自己。你们竟然跑到维京伯格给别人买东西，这可算不上什么睦邻行为——”
Mr. Granger puffed deeply on his cigar and did not look at Uncle Hammer. When he spoke again it was to Big Ma. His voice was harsh, but he made no comment on what Uncle Hammer had said. “I don’t think your Paul Edward would’ve condoned something like this and risked losing this place. How come you let your boys go do it!”
格兰杰先生没有回答，他深深吸了一口雪茄，又将矛头对向奶奶，他的声音听起来尖锐而刺耳：“我想你那死去的丈夫也不会允许你们这么做吧？何况还是冒着失去土地的风险。你怎么这么纵容你的孩子？”
Big Ma smoothed the lap of her dress with her hands, They grown and it’s they land. I got no more say in it.”
奶奶抚了抚裙子的下摆：“这是孩子们的土地，我没有什么好说的。”
Mr. Granger’s eyes showed no surprise, but he pursed his lips again and ran his tongue around his teeth. “The price of cotton’s mighty low, y’all know that.” he said finally. “Could be that I’ll have to charge my people more of their crops next summer just to make ends meet… I’d hate to do it, ’cause if I did my people wouldn’t hardly have enough to buy winter stores, let alone be able to pay their debts…”
格兰杰先生的眼睛里并没有过多惊讶，他只是又开始用舌头舔牙齿了：“你们都知道，最近棉花价格很低。为了平衡收支，明年夏天我就得征收更多农作物…虽然我也不乐意做这种事情，因为这样的话，我的佃农们就没有钱买过冬的储备，更别提付之前欠下的贷款了。”
There was a tense, waiting silence before his glance slid to Papa again.
格兰杰先生斜眼扫了爸爸一眼，屋里的氛围变得异常紧张。
“Mr. Joe Higgins up at First National told me that he couldn’t hardly honor a loan to folks who go around stirring up a lot of bad feelings in the community –“
“在国家第一银行工作的希金斯先生跟我说，他绝对不会借款给那些故意破坏社区和谐的人——”
Mr. Granger paled, but did not turn to Uncle Hammer. “Money’s too scarce,” he continued as if he had not heard, “and folks like that are a poor risk. You ready to lose your land, David, because of this thing!”
格兰杰先生装作没听到，接着怂恿爸爸：“你们为了那帮居民冒这样的风险，值得吗？大卫，你们打算失去那块土地了吗？”
Papa was lighting his pipe. He did not look up until the flame had caught in the tobacco and held there. Then he turned to Mr. Granger. “Two hundred acres of this place been Logan land for almost fifty years now, the other two hundred for fifteen. We’ve been through bad times and good times but we ain’t never lost none of it. Ain’t gonna start now.”
爸爸点燃烟斗，直到燃起了烟，他才抬起头说道：“这片土地中的两百英亩，已经属于我们洛根家五十余年了。剩下的两百英亩也有十五年了。我们经历了风风雨雨、起起落落，从来没有失去过它。以后，也绝不会。”
“And especially stirring the colored folks out of their place.” interjected Uncle Hammer calmly.
“尤其是那些扰乱黑人生活的人。”哈默大伯淡淡地插了一句话。
Mr. Granger said quietly, “It was Granger land before it was Logan.”
格兰杰先生语气冰冷：“这曾经是格兰杰家族的土地。”
Papa took the pipe from his mouth and stared into the fire. When he faced Mr. Granger again his voice was very quiet, very distinct, very sure. “You being white, you can just ’bout plan on anything you want, But I tell you this one thing: You plan on getting this land, you’re planning on the wrong thing,”
爸爸从嘴里拿出烟斗，凝视着炉火。当他和格兰杰先生四目对望时，他的语气坚定而平静：“你是白人，爱怎么做可以怎么做。但我告诉你，你要是敢打这块地的主意，门儿都没有。”
Papa impaled Mr. Granger with an icy stare. “Then you’d better make them good,” he said.
爸爸的眼神冰冷无比：“那你最好计划得周全点。”
“Slave land,” said Papa.
“奴隶种植园。”爸爸说。
Mr. Granger nodded. “Wouldn’t have lost this section if it hadn’t been stolen by your Yankee carpetbaggers after the war. But y’all keep on playing Santa Claus and I’m gonna get it back — real easy. I want you to know that I plan to do whatever I need to, to keep peace down in here.”
格兰杰先生点点头：“要不是战后被你们这些北方佬占去，我们才不会失去这片土地呢。如果你们还想继续扮演发善心的圣诞老公公，那我就能轻而易举地把土地拿回来。我要你们知道，为了维护这里的和平，我会采取一些必要的措施的。”
Mama’s hand crossed almost unseen to Papa’s arm.
妈妈的手交叉在爸爸的胳膊上，几乎看不见。
Mr. Granger stood to go, a smile creeping smugly over his lips as if he knew a secret but refused to tell. He glanced at Uncle Hammer, then turned and left, leaving the silence behind him,
格兰杰先生起身，嘴角挂着一丝神秘的微笑，似乎有什么不可告人的秘密。他瞥了哈默大伯一眼，转身离去。屋里，一片寂静。
Mr. Granger looked up slyly, “There’s lots of ways of stop ping you, David.”
格兰杰先生满不在乎：“我可有很多法子呢。”
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