It took him just one word.
只用了一个字。
I sighed. She would be awake soon. It must be nearly seven in the morning. Would she be looking for me? Abruptly, something close to panic had my body freezing up. What would she look like today?
我叹了口气，她很快就会醒了。现在应该快到早上七点，她醒来后会找我吗？突然，一个念头让我惊的僵在地上，她今天会是什么样子呢？
It was only a little while later that Edward reminded me of my priorities.
不到一会儿，爱德华提起了那个我现在最优先考虑的人。
I probably looked like a cartoon, the way I sprung up, then looked back at him — his diamond body faintly glinting in the diffuse light — then away to the west, where Renesmee waited, then back at him again, then back toward her, my head whipping from side to side a half dozen times in a second. Edward smiled, but didn’t laugh; he was a strong man.
我像个卡通人物一样猛地蹦起来，看着他——他钻石般的身体在周围弥漫的光线照耀下闪闪发光——然后看向蕾妮斯梅所在的西方，接着又看着他，脑袋来回晃了几十次。爱德华微笑着，没出声，他真的很伟大。
“Renesmee…”
“蕾妮斯梅……”
“And we have all night, right?”
“而且我们还有无数夜晚，对吗？”
Edward felt the total distraction of my stress. “It’s all right, love. Get dressed, and we’ll be back to the house in two seconds.”
爱德华觉得我的担心完全没必要：“没事的，亲爱的。穿上衣服，我们在两秒钟之内就能回到家。”
“It’s all about balance, love. You’re so good at all of this, I don’t imagine it will take too long to put everything in perspective.”
“只是个关于如何平衡的问题，亲爱的。你现在就做的很不错了，我不怀疑你以后一定能让一切井井有条。”
He smiled wider. “Do you think I could bear to let you get dressed now if that weren’t the case?”
他笑得更开心了：“你以为如果不是这样，我能让你现在就穿上衣服吗？”
That would have to be enough to get me through the daylight hours. I would balance this overwhelming, devastating desire so that I could be a good — It was hard to think the word. Though Renesmee was very real and vital in my life, it was still difficult to think of myself as a mother. I supposed anyone would feel the same, though, without nine months to get used to the idea. And with a child that changed by the hour.
我想有这句话就足够让我熬过漫长的白天了，能好好的平衡这无法压抑的毁灭性的渴望，做一个好的——要说出这个词不是太容易。虽然蕾妮斯梅现在已经是非常真实和重要的一个人，但把自己当成一个母亲还是有点困难。不过我猜任何人身处我的位置，都会有一样的想法，毕竟我没有那漫长的九个月来适应这个称呼，还有一个时刻不停的快速成长的孩子。
The thought of Renesmee’s speeding life had me stressed-out again in an instant. I didn’t even pause at the ornately carved double doors to catch my breath before finding out what Alice had done. I just burst through, intent on wearing the first things I touched. I should have known it wouldn’t be that easy.
想着蕾妮斯梅被加速的生命，我就感到一阵喘不过气的压力。猛地推开那扇雕刻精美的华丽柜门，我甚至没有停下来好好看一眼，想着直接抓住第一眼看到的衣服就往身上套——我早就该知道这不会很容易的。
“Which ones are mine?” I hissed. As promised, the room was bigger than our bedroom. It might have been bigger than the rest of the house put together, but I’d have to pace it off to be positive. I had a brief mental flash of Alice trying to persuade Esme to ignore classic proportions and allow this monstrosity. I wondered how Alice had won that one.
“哪些是我的？”我悄悄的问。就像爱德华之前说的，这衣柜比我们睡房还大，我甚至怀疑它有整个别墅剩下的房间加起来那么大，要想步测它的面积得在里面踱半天。真想知道爱丽丝是怎样说服埃斯梅忽略这严重不成比例的房间，她是用了什么方法来取胜？
“Alice,” we said together. He said her name like an explanation; I said it like an expletive.
“爱丽丝，”我们不约而同的说出口，他的语气倒像在解释，而我就明摆着是充满怨气。
“To the best of my knowledge, everything but this rack here” — he touched a bar that stretched along the half-wall to the left of the door — “is yours.”
“据我所知，所有东西除了这半列——”他指了指墙边的半列衣架——“其他都是你的。”
Finding something normal to wear could take all day!
看来花上一天都不一定能找到一件正常点的衣服。
“All of this?” He shrugged.
“所有？”他耸耸肩。
I flitted to his side. “How did you do that?”
我掠过一溜儿衣架来到他身边：“你怎么做到的？”
Everything was wrapped in garment bags, pristine and white, row after row after row.
所有东西都装在经典的白色包装袋里，一列一列的整齐排放着。
“Denim has its own scent just like anything else. Now… stretch cotton?”
“丁尼布有种特殊的气味，跟其他布料不一样。现在……到纯棉T恤？”
He followed his nose to a half-rack, unearthing a long-sleeved white t-shirt. He tossed it to me.
他跟着鼻子的指引来到一个网架处，翻出一件长袖白T恤，递给我。
“Let me help,” Edward offered. He sniffed carefully at the air and then followed some scent to the back of the long room. There was a built-in dresser there. He sniffed again, then opened a drawer. With a triumphant grin, he held out a pair of artfully faded blue jeans.
“我来帮忙吧，”爱德华殷勤的说，他深深的吸了一口气，顺着某种特殊的气味走到这狭长的房间的最后面，那边的墙壁上嵌着一个梳妆台。他又闻了一下，然后打开一个抽屉，露出胜利的微笑，拿出一条充满艺术感的蓝色水磨牛仔裤。
“Fine,” I muttered, and I pulled down the zipper on the closest bag. I growled under my breath when I saw the floorlength silk gown inside — baby pink.
“很好，”我咬牙切齿的说了句，接着拉下身前的包装袋的拉链，凄惨的嚎叫了一声，看见一条粉红色丝绸及地长裙出现在眼前。
“Thanks,” I said fervently. I inhaled each fabric, memorizing the scent for future searches through this madhouse. I remembered silk and satin; I would avoid those.
“谢谢，”我感激涕零的说，也试着自己去嗅着各种布料，记住他们的味道，以备未来这个疯狂的房间所需。我已经记住了丝绸和缎子的味道，以后闻到它们绝对有多远走多远。
It only took him seconds to find his own clothes — if I hadn’t seen him undressed, I would have sworn there was nothing more beautiful than Edward in his khakis and pale beige pullover — and then he took my hand. We darted through the hidden garden, leaped lightly over the stone wall, and hit the forest at a dead sprint. I pulled my hand free so that we could race back. He beat me this time.
他只花了几秒钟就找到要穿的衣服——如果不是我刚才还看到他什么都没穿的样子，我发誓我肯定会以为他现在是全世界最帅的人——穿着米黄色卡其布套衫。接着他拉起我的手，我们穿过秘密花园，轻轻跳过石头矮围墙，飞快的冲向森林。我放下爱德华的手这样我们就能比赛谁先到家，这次他打败了我。
Renesmee was awake; she was sitting up on the floor with Rose and Emmett hovering over her, playing with a little pile of twisted silverware. She had a mangled spoon in her right hand. As soon as she spied me through the glass, she chucked the spoon on the floor — where it left a divot in the wood — and pointed in my direction imperiously. Her audience laughed; Alice, Jasper, Esme, and Carlisle were sitting on the couch, watching her as if she were the most engrossing film.
蕾妮斯梅已经醒了，她坐在罗莎和埃美特之间的地板上，玩着一件形状诡异的银器，右手拿着一个扭断了的汤匙。当她发现我正在穿过草地的时候，马上把汤匙往地上一扔，任性的指着我。她的观众都笑起来：爱丽丝、贾斯帕、埃斯梅还有坐在沙发上像在看着最有趣的电影一样看着她的卡莱尔。
I was through the door before their laughter had barely begun, bounding across the room and scooping her up from the floor in the same second. We smiled widely at each other.
在他们还没笑出声的时候，我就到门口了，飞过房间从地上一把把她抱起来，两人对着对方开心的笑起来。
She was different, but not so much. A little longer again, her proportions drifting from babyish to childlike. Her hair was longer by a quarter inch, the curls bouncing like springs with every movement. I’d let my imagination run wild on the trip back, and I’d imagined worse than this. Thanks to my overdone fears, these little changes were almost a relief. Even without Carlisle’s measurements, I was sure the changes were slower than yesterday.
她的确变了，但不是太多。这次她从婴儿的外表变的有点像儿童了。头发大概长长了四分之一寸，小卷毛像泉水一样跳跃着。在回来的路上，我想象中她的样子要比现在恐怖，感谢我杞人忧天的害怕，现在她这些小改变简直就像是安慰一样。即使卡莱尔不去测量我也很确定，生长的确变慢了。
Renesmee patted my cheek. I winced. She was hungry again.
蕾妮斯梅拍拍我的脸，我犹豫了一下，她说她又饿了。
“How long has she been up?” I asked as Edward disappeared through the kitchen doorway. I was sure he was on his way to get her breakfast, having seen what she’d just thought as clearly as I had. I wondered if he would ever have noticed her little quirk, if he’d been the only one to know her. To him, it probably would have seemed like hearing anyone.
“她起来了多久？”我问道，看见爱德华的身影消失在厨房门口。我知道他去帮她准备早餐了，而且肯定和我一样看见她刚才说的话。我不知道他原来是不是注意过她的小暗示，如果他是唯一一个能听懂她的人的话。不过对他来说，可能和听其他人的心里话没什么区别。
Before Esme could respond, Emmett was laughing again — it wasn’t silent this time.
埃斯梅还没回答，埃美特就笑出来了——这次他笑出声来了。
“So it’s still standing?” he managed to get out between his snickers. “I would’ve thought you two had knocked it to rubble by now. What were you doing last night? Discussing the national debt?” He howled with laughter.
“这么说那房子还好好的？”他好不容易止住笑，问：“我还以为你们俩绝对会拆了那房子。你们昨晚干了啥？讨论国家财政赤字？”他笑的快喘不过气来了。
Rosalie bit her lip and looked away, trying not to laugh. I could feel Emmett’s silent laughter behind me, sending vibrations through the foundations of the house. I kept my chin high. “We’ll get your room set up right away,” I said to Renesmee. “You’ll like the cottage. It’s magic.” I look up at Esme. “Thank you, Esme. So much. It’s absolutely perfect.”
罗莎莉紧紧的咬着嘴唇，瞄着其他东西，努力的忍住笑。我能感觉到在我背后埃美特无声的狂笑：“你会喜欢那个小别墅的，像魔法一样。”我望向埃斯梅：“谢谢你，埃斯梅。真的，非常漂亮，非常完美。”
“Just a few minutes,” Rose said. “We would have called you soon. She’s been asking for you — demanding might be a better description. Esme sacrificed her second-best silver service to keep the little monster entertained.” Rose smiled at Renesmee with so much gloating affection that the criticism was entirely weightless. “We didn’t want to… er, bother you.”
“只有几分钟，”罗莎说：“我们本来就打算喊你们了。她刚才一直在问你——要你，这么说可能更适合。埃斯梅贡献出她第二好的银器藏品来转移这个小坏蛋的注意力。”罗莎得意洋洋的看着她笑道，话里的批评早就不知道跑到哪去了：“我们不想……呃，打扰你们。”
I gritted my teeth and reminded myself of the negative consequences when I’d let my temper get away from me yesterday. Of course, Emmett wasn’t as breakable as Seth…
我咬牙切齿的瞪着他，提醒自己别生气，不然后果可能像昨天那样。当然，埃美特倒是比塞思强壮些。
“What was he so upset about?” Edward asked as he came back into the room with Renesmee’s cup. There must have been more in Rosalie’s memory than I’d seen in her expression.
“他那么沮丧是为什么？”爱德华拿着蕾妮斯梅的杯子走进来。罗莎莉知道的肯定比她表现出来的要多的多。
Thinking of Seth made me wonder. “Where’re the wolves today?” I glanced out the window wall, but there had been no sign of Leah on the way in.
想到塞思我问：“今天狼人们都去哪了？”我扫了一眼玻璃墙，但没发现任何迹象说利亚在那儿。
“Jacob took off this morning pretty early,” Rosalie told me, a little frown creasing her forehead. “Seth followed him out.”
“雅各布今天早上很早就离开了，”罗莎莉告诉我说，皱了一点点额头：“塞思跟着他。”
Without breathing, I handed Renesmee off to Rosalie. Super-self-control, maybe, but there was no way I was going to be able to feed her. Not yet.
屏着呼吸，我把蕾妮斯梅递给罗莎莉。虽然有“超级自控力”，但是让我自己来喂她还是太勉强，暂时来说。
“I don’t know — or care,” Rosalie grumbled, but she answered Edward’s question more fully. “He was watching Nessie sleep, his mouth hanging open like the moron he is, and then he just jumped to his feet without any kind of trigger — that I noticed, anyway — and stormed out. I was glad to be rid of him. The more time he spends here, the less chance there is that we’ll ever get the smell out.”
“我不知道——也不在乎，”罗莎莉发着牢骚，但还是详细的回答了爱德华的问题：“他只是看着内希睡觉，嘴巴张的像他这个人一样蠢，突然没有任何征兆的跳起来——起码我没发现——然后冲了出去。我倒觉得他走了挺好的，只要他在这里待的时间越长，以后我们越没可能把这臭味清干净。”
“Rose,” Esme chided gently.
“罗莎。”埃斯梅温和的责骂了一句。
“I still say we should go straight to New Hampshire and get things set up,” Emmett said, obviously continuing an earlier conversation. “Bella’s already registered at Dartmouth. Doesn’t look like it will take her all that long to be able to handle school.” He turned to look at me with a teasing grin. “I’m sure you’ll ace your classes… apparently there’s nothing interesting for you to do at night besides study.”
我一直都说我们应该直接去新汉普郡，让一切安定下来。”埃美特这么说，很明显是在继续他们之前的某次讨论：“贝拉已经在黑暗世界注册了，看上去也不需要太长时间来适应新的学校生活。”他转过头揶揄的对我笑着：“我敢肯定你以后一定会很擅长功课……反正你晚上也没什么事干。”
Rosalie flipped her hair. “I suppose it doesn’t matter. We won’t be here that much longer.”
罗莎莉抓了抓头发：“我以为没什么关系。我们在这儿也不会待太长时间了。”
Do not lose your temper, do not lose your temper, I chanted to myself. And then I was proud of myself for keeping my head.
别生气，别生气，别生气，我对着自己念咒。很骄傲的发现自己到现在都还在控制下。
Before any of us could respond, Alice was on her feet.
在我们所有人反应过来之前，爱丽丝动了。
Rosalie giggled.
罗莎莉咯咯的笑起来。
He growled — an abrupt, shocking rasp of sound — and the blackest fury rolled across his expression like storm clouds.
他吼了一声——非常突然的，让人恐惧的嘶吼声——阴沉像乌云一样笼罩着他的脸。
So I was pretty surprised that Edward didn’t.
正因为如此，看到爱德华没能控制住自己，让我非常惊讶。
“What is he doing? What is that dog doing that has erased my schedule for the entire day? I can’t see anything! No!” She shot me a tortured glance. “Look at you! You need me to show you how to use your closet.”
“他在做什么？那只狗做了什么，让我对今天的安排全部消失了？我看不见任何信息？不！”她痛苦的看了我一眼说：“看看你！你得让我教你怎么运用那个衣柜！”
And then Edward’s hands balled up into fists and he snarled, “He talked to Charlie. He thinks Charlie is following after him. Coming here. Today.”
接着爱德华的手紧紧握起来，咆哮了一句：“他告诉查理了。他知道查理在跟着他，过来这里，今天。”
For one second I was grateful for whatever Jacob was up to.
有那么一秒钟，我很感激雅各布，无论他刚才做了什么。
Alice said a word that sounded very odd in her trilling, ladylike voice, and then she blurred into motion, streaking out the back door.
爱丽丝说了一个词，对她那高雅的淑女的声音来说非常古怪，接着身影动了动，冲出门。
It must have started raining farther east. Jacob came through the door shaking his wet hair like a dog, flipping droplets on the carpet and the couch where they made little round gray spots on the white. His teeth glinted against his dark lips; his eyes were bright and excited. He walked with jerky movements, like he was all hyped-up about destroying my father’s life.
东边肯定在下雨，雅各布像小狗一样边甩着湿透的头发边走进来，身上滴下来的水珠在纯白地毯和沙发上弄出一个又一个的小灰点。咧着嘴露出闪光的牙齿，眼里满是高兴和兴奋。他跑跳着进来，像对毁了我爸爸的人生很骄傲一样。
“Hey, guys,” he greeted us, grinning. It was perfectly silent.
“嘿，大家好啊，”他向我们问候了一句，微笑着。但回答他的是完美的寂静。
Edward spoke through his teeth. “Jacob’s on his way in now.”
爱德华从齿缝中挤出一句话：“雅各布在来这儿的路上了。”
“He told Charlie?” I gasped. “But — doesn’t he understand? How could he do that?” Charlie couldn’t know about me! About vampires! That would put him on a hit list that even the Cullens couldn’t save him from. “No!”
“他告诉了查理？”我剧烈的喘着气：“但——难道他不明白吗？他怎么能这么做？”查理不能和我相认！不能知道关于吸血鬼的任何事！那会让他出现在攻击名单上，即使Cullen家族也救不了他，“不！”
“Charlie’ll be here soon,” Jacob said to me casually. “Just a heads-up. I assume Alice is getting you sunglasses or something?”
“查理很快就会到这里，”雅各布随意的告诉我一句：“只是个提醒，我觉得爱丽丝肯定去帮你拿墨镜或类似的什么东西了。”
Leah and Seth slipped in behind him, in their human forms — for now; both of their hands were trembling with the tension in the room.
利亚和塞思在他之后走进来，以人类的形态——暂时。两人的手都因为房间里的紧张气氛而颤抖着。
She was very still, watching and listening. How much did she understand?
她很安静的看着我，聆听着。她明白多少？
“Rose,” I said, holding my arms out. Wordlessly, Rosalie handed me Renesmee. I pressed her close to my motionless heart, holding her like a talisman against rash behavior. I would keep her in my arms until I was sure my decision to kill Jacob was based entirely on rational judgment rather than fury.
“罗莎，”我说，伸出手。不需要任何言语的说明，罗莎莉把蕾妮斯梅递给我。我把她紧紧的抱在已经不在跳动的胸前的心脏处，像捧着一个护身符一样，试图安抚下自己急躁的行为。在我确定自己要杀掉雅各布的决定是绝对从理性的角度出发而不是愤怒以前，我得一直抱着她。
“Do you even realize what you’ve done? The danger you’ve put him in?”
“你真的对你所做的事一点意识都没有吗？你让他陷入的危险？”
“You assume way too much,” I spit through my teeth. “What. Have. You. Done?”
“你自作主张太过分了，”我的气愤从口里喷出来：“你，到，底，做，了，什，么？”
Jacob’s smile wavered, but he was still too wound up to answer seriously. “Blondie and Emmett woke me up this morning going on and on about you all moving cross-country. Like I could let you leave. Charlie was the biggest issue there, right? Well, problem solved.”
雅各布的笑容颤动了一下，但是他还是太兴奋以至于根本不能严肃的回答我的问题。“布兰迪和埃美特今天早上一遍又一遍的吵着我说你们很快要搬到美国的另一边去了，说得好像我能让你们离开一样。但查理是最大的问题所在，不是吗？那么现在，问题解决了，哈。”
Edward moved then, darting across the room to get in Jacob’s face. Though he was half a head shorter than Jacob, Jacob leaned away from his staggering anger as if Edward towered over him.
爱德华行动了，向雅各布扑过去。虽然他比雅各布要整整矮半个头，但雅各布还是像看到一个塔压向他一样的狼狈逃开。
“That’s just a theory, mongrel,” he snarled. “You think we should test it out on Charlie? Did you consider the physical pain you’re putting Bella through, even if she can resist? Or the emotional pain if she doesn’t? I suppose what happens to Bella no longer concerns you!” He spit the last word.
“那只是一个理论，杂种狗，”他咆哮：“你觉得我们应该拿查理来做实验吗？你有想过你让贝拉承受的身体上的伤痛会有多大吗，即使她能控制住？还是说如果她控制不住时，精神上的惨痛折磨？是不是现在贝拉的一切对你来说都无关紧要了！”他吼完最后一个字。
He snorted. “I didn’t put him in danger. Except from you. But you’ve got some kind of supernatural self-control, right? Not as good as mind reading, if you ask me. Much less exciting.”
他嗤了一口气：“我没让他陷入任何危险，除了来自你的。但你现在有什么‘超自然自控力’，不是吗？如果你问我的话，我还是觉得心灵感应更好一些。你的要无趣得多。”
Renesmee pressed her fingers anxiously to my cheek, anxiety coloring the replay in her head.
蕾妮斯梅焦急的把她的手指按着我的脸颊，担心的颜色在她的脑袋回旋。
Edward’s words finally cut through Jacob’s strangely electric mood. His mouth dropped into a frown. “Bella will be in pain?”
爱德华的话终于结束了雅各布诡异的兴奋感，最好抿的紧紧的。“贝拉会很痛？”
“I didn’t know that,” Jacob whispered.
“我真的不知道，”雅各布无神的喃喃自语。
“Like you’ve shoved a white-hot branding iron down her throat!” I flinched, remembering the scent of pure human blood.
“就像你把一个烧的通红的铁块直接烙到她的喉咙里！”我的心忽然一悸整个人不由自主的退了几步，记忆里那是人血的香气。
“Then perhaps you should have asked first,” Edward growled back through his teeth.
“那或许你应该先问问，”爱德华激动的冲着他吼道。
“You would have stopped me.”
“你应该阻止我的。”
“You should have been stopped –“
“本来我能阻止你的，如果不是你——”
“This isn’t about me,” I interrupted. I stood very still, keeping my hold on Renesmee and sanity. “This is about Charlie, Jacob. How could you put him in danger this way? Do you realize it’s death or vampire life for him now, too?” My voice trembled with the tears my eyes could no longer shed.
“问题的重点不是我，”我打断他们，僵立在地上怀里抱着蕾妮斯梅，还好脑袋是清醒的：“雅各布，重点是查理。你怎么能让他身陷这种的危险情况？你有没有想过，现在对他来说要么是死亡要么要变成吸血鬼了？”声音颤抖着，就像在流着我已经失去了的眼泪。
Jacob was still troubled by Edward’s accusations, but mine didn’t seem to bother him. “Relax, Bella. I didn’t tell him anything you weren’t planning to tell him.”
雅各布被爱德华的指控所困扰，但我的问题却没有难倒他：“放松点，贝拉。我没有告诉他任何你们不准备告诉他的事情。”
“But he’s coming here!”
“但他要来这里！”
My fingers flexed away from Renesmee. I curled them back in securely. “Say it straight, Jacob. I don’t have the patience for this.”
我的手指有点蜷缩，从蕾妮斯梅身上松开，但我马上把它们握紧放回原来的位置以防万一：“直接点别绕弯了，雅各布。别考验我的耐心。”
“Yeah, that’s the idea. Wasn’t the whole ‘let him make the wrong assumptions’ thing your plan? I think I provided a very nice red herring, if I do say so myself.”
“对，那就是我的目的。难道故意让他误解不是你一直的计划吗？而且我觉得如果我真的说出去了的话，那就给你们提供了一条太好的红鲱鱼了。”
“I didn’t tell him anything about you, Bella. Not really. I told him about me. Well, show is probably a better verb.”
“我没有告诉他任何关于你的事，贝拉。相反，我跟他说了我的事。更确切的说，是给他秀了一下。”
“He’s brave. Brave as you are. Didn’t pass out or throw up or anything. I gotta say, I was impressed. You should’ve seen his face when I started taking my clothes off, though. Priceless,” Jacob chortled.
“他很勇敢，跟你一样用过。完全没有要晕倒、歇斯底里或者其他任何东西。我得说，我印象深刻啊。你真的应该看看当我开始脱衣服时他的表情，这可是无价的。”他自己乐起来，倒是还有心情开玩笑。
“You absolute moron! You could have given him a heart attack!”
“你这只低能愚蠢的东西，你会吓得他心脏病爆发的！”
“You have half of that, Jacob.” My voice was flat and steely. “You have thirty seconds to tell me every single word before I give Renesmee to Rosalie and rip your miserable head off. Seth won’t be able to stop me this time.”
“给你30秒，雅各布，”我平淡且毫无表情的说：“在我把蕾妮斯梅递给罗莎莉，然后把你那可怜的脑袋咬下来之前，告诉我你跟他讲的每一句话。这次塞思也办法阻止我了。”
Jacob rolled his eyes and flopped into the nearest chair. His little pack moved to stand on his flanks, not at all relaxed the way he seemed to be; Leah’s eyes were on me, her teeth slightly bared.
雅各布翻了个白眼，把自己摔在最近的椅子上。不像他表现的那样轻松，他小小的狼群跟着站到他的侧翼；利亚的眼睛紧紧的盯着我，牙齿轻微的咬着。
“He phased in front of Charlie,” Edward hissed. I whispered, “You what?”
“他在查理面前变身了。”爱德华嘘了一句。我不敢置信的问道：“你什么？”
“Jeez, Bells. You didn’t used to be so melodramatic. Is that a vampire thing?”
“小杰，贝尔。你们没必要这么神经兮兮的，这像是吸血鬼的行为吗？”
“So I knocked on Charlie’s door this morning and asked him to come for a walk with me. He was confused, but when I told him it was about you and that you were back in town, he followed me out to the woods. I told him you weren’t sick anymore, and that things were a little weird, but good. He was about to take off to see you, but I told him I had to show him something first. And then I phased.” Jacob shrugged.
“就是，我早上去敲了查理的门，请他跟我一起散步。他有点疑惑，但当我告诉他是关于你已经回来了的事后，他就跟着我去了森林。我告诉她你已经完全痊愈了，但事情变得有点奇怪，从好的方向。他马上想来看你，但我告诉他我得先给他看样东西。接着我就变身了。”雅各布耸了下肩。
“Charlie’s fine. He’s tough. If you’d give this just a minute, you’ll see that I did you a favor here.”
“查理现在很好，他很强壮。如果你能给我一分钟解释，你会发现我帮了你很大的忙。”
“Twenty-six seconds.”
“26秒。”
My teeth felt like a vise was pushing them together. “I want every word, you monster.”
像有人拿钳子把我的牙齿钳到一起一样，我说：“我要知道你说的每句话，变态。”
“Well, you said I only had thirty seconds — okay, okay.” My expression must have convinced him that I wasn’t in the mood for teasing. “Lemme see… I phased back and got dressed, and then after he started breathing again, I said something like, ‘Charlie, you don’t live in the world you thought you lived in. The good news is, nothing has changed — except that now you know. Life’ll go on the same way it always has. You can go right back to pretending that you don’t believe any of this.'”
“可，是你自己说我只有30秒的——好的，好的。”我的表情告诉他我没心情跟他开玩笑：“让我想想……然后我变回来，穿上衣服，在他重新呼吸之后，我说了类似这样的话‘查理，你生活的世界并不像你以为的那样，但好消息是，所有东西都没有改变——除了，现在你知道了的。日子还要继续过下去，跟原来一样。当然，你可以掉头就走，假装你不相信这一切。’”
Edward hissed while I stared in horror; this was headed in a dangerous direction.
爱德华倒吸了一口气，而我则恐惧的发着呆，事情正朝着危险的方向前进。
“It took him a minute to get his head together, and then he wanted to know what was really going on with you, with the whole rare-disease thing. I told him that you had been sick, but you were fine now — it was just that you’d had to change a little bit in the process of getting better. He wanted to know what I meant by ‘change,’ and I told him that you looked a lot more like Esme now than you looked like Renee.”
他花了几分钟来想清楚，接着他想知道在你身上到底发生了什么，包括那个可怕的罕见的病的事。我告诉他你的确生病了，但现在你很好——只不过在治疗的过程中变了一点点而已。他想知道我说的“变了”是什么意思，于是我告诉他你现在变得更像埃斯梅了，而不是勒妮。
I inhaled deeply. “What was the other thing he wanted?”
我深吸一口气：“另一件是什么？”
Rosalie made a noise of disgust.
罗莎莉发出厌恶的声音。
“After a few minutes, he asked, real quietly, if you turned into an animal, too. And I said, ‘She wishes she was that cool!'” Jacob chuckled.
“过了一会儿，他问，你是不是也变成了某种动物。然后我说，‘她倒是希望自己有这么酷！’”雅各布吃吃的笑起来。
“I started to tell him more about werewolves, but I didn’t even get the whole word out — Charlie cut me off and said he’d ‘rather not know the specifics.’ Then he asked if you’d known what you were getting yourself into when you married Edward, and I said, ‘Sure, she’s known all about this for years, since she first came to Forks.’ He didn’t like that very much. I let him rant till he got it out of his system. After he got calmed down, he just wanted two things. He wanted to see you, and I said it would be better if he gave me a head start to explain.”
“我想给他说说狼人的具体情况，但还没开始——他就打断我说‘我宁愿不知道这些情况。’接着他问你跟爱德华结婚之前是不是就知道了所有事，我说，‘当然，她几年前就知道了，从她刚来这镇上。’他好像对这个很不高兴，我让他嚷嚷着把它发泄出来。他冷静下来后，只想做两件事。首先想见你，但我告诉他让我先来打个招呼比较好。”
I felt relief for the first time since Jacob had walked in. “I can handle that part.”
自从雅各布走进来后，我第一次觉得有点松了口气：“这部分我能接受。”
Jacob smiled. “You’ll like this. His main request is that he be told as little as possible about all of this. If it’s not absolutely essential for him to know something, then keep it to yourself. Need to know, only.”
雅各布微笑起来：“你会喜欢这个的。他的意思是，如果可能的话，希望知道的越少越好，除非是非常必要的，不然你就别说出来。只有，必要的。”
“What did you tell him about Renesmee?” I struggled to maintain the razor edge in my voice, fighting the reluctant appreciation. It was premature. There was still so much wrong with this situation. Even if Jacob’s intervention had brought out a better reaction in Charlie than I’d ever hoped for…
“你有没有跟他说蕾妮斯梅？”我努力让声音保持清晰，努力不去承认自己有点感激，那还太早了。现在这种情况下，事情还是有很多漏洞。即使雅各布的自作主张使查理的反应比我想象中好一些。
“Other than that, he’d just like to pretend things are normal.” Jacob’s smile turned smug; he must suspect that I would be starting to feel the first faint stirrings of gratitude about now.
“除了这些，他只是想假装一切都很正常。”雅各布又开始俏皮起来，肯定是自我感觉良好的认为，我现在开始会对他感激涕零了。
“Oh yeah. So I told him that you and Edward had inherited a new little mouth to feed.” He glanced at Edward. “She’s your orphaned ward — like Bruce Wayne and Dick Grayson.” Jacob snorted. “I didn’t think you’d mind me lying. That’s all part of the game, right?” Edward didn’t respond in any way, so Jacob went on. “Charlie was way past being shocked at this point, but he did ask if you were adopting her. ‘Like a daughter? Like I’m sort of a grandfather?’ were his exact words. I told him yes. ‘Congrats, Gramps,’ and all of that. He even smiled a little.”
噢，当然。所以我告诉他你和爱德华领养了一个小尾巴。”他瞟了爱德华一眼：“她是你的心爱的小孤女——就跟Bruce.Wayne和Dick.Grayson一样。”雅各布嗤了嗤鼻子：“我觉得你们应该不会介意我撒谎。这只是游戏的一部分，不是吗？”爱德华沉默着没给他任何回答，因此雅各布接着说：“现在查理应该早就不震惊了，但他的确想问问你是不是真的领养了她，‘作为女儿？这么说，我也是个外公什么的了？’这真的是他自己说的。我告诉他是的，‘恭喜你，外公’。这就是全部了，最后他还笑了。”（布鲁斯·韦恩和迪克 格雷森都是蝙蝠侠里面的人物）
“But she’s changing so fast,” I whispered.
“但她长大的这么快。”我喃喃道。
Jacob stared at me with half a smile, waiting.
雅各布半揣着微笑半揣着担心，等着我的反应。
The stinging returned to my eyes, but not out of fear or anguish this time. Charlie was smiling at the idea of being a grandpa? Charlie would meet Renesmee?
我眼睛又开始刺痛起来，不过这次不是因为害怕或苦恼。查理对外公这件事笑了？他会来看蕾妮斯梅？
“I told him that she was more special than all of us put together,” Jacob said in a soft voice. He stood and walked right up to me, waving Leah and Seth off when they started to follow. Renesmee reached out to him, but I hugged her more tightly to me. “I told him, ‘Trust me, you don’t want to know about this. But if you can ignore all the strange parts, you’re going to be amazed. She’s the most wonderful person in the whole world.’ And then I told him that if he could deal with that, you all would stick around for a while and he would have a chance to get to know her. But that if it was too much for him, you would leave. He said as long as no one forced too much information on him, he’d deal.”
“我有告诉他，她是我们所有人中最特别的一个。”雅各布温柔的说，站起来朝我走近，挥挥手让跟着的利亚和塞思离开。蕾妮斯梅伸着手要他，但我把她朝自己抱得更紧：“我跟他说，相信我，你不会想知道原因的。但如果你能忽略所有奇怪的地方，你会非常惊讶的，她是世界上最美好的人。接着我说，如果他能接受这一切，那你们就会在这里再住一段时间，这样他就有机会了解她了。但如果这对他来说太多了，你们就会离开。他说只要没有人逼他去听更多的内幕，他就同意。”
“I’m not going to say thank you,” I told him. “You’re still putting Charlie at a huge risk.”
“我不会跟你说谢谢，”我告诉他：“你还是让查理陷入巨大的危险中。”
Try as hard as I could to resist, I had to smile back. Just a tiny smile.
尽管努力克制不去回应，但我还是回笑了。只是个很微弱的笑容。
He smiled his very most Jacob-y smile. “Still friends?”
他用我最熟悉的雅各布的笑容微笑着：“还是朋友？”
He held out his hand: an offer.
他伸出手：交易达成？
“I am sorry about it hurting you. I didn’t know it was like that. Bella, things are different with us now, but you’ll always be my best friend, and I’ll always love you. But I’ll love you the right way now. There’s finally a balance. We both have people we can’t live without.”
“我很抱歉这会让你痛苦。我之前并不知道会这样。贝拉，一切跟原来完全不同了，但你永远都是我最好的朋友，我也永远爱着你，不过是以正确的方式。现在事情终于平衡起来，我们都找到失去了就不能独活的人。”
“When you don’t kill Charlie tonight, you’ll owe me huge.” I rolled my eyes.
“只要你今晚没杀了查理，你欠我的就不是一点点了。”我翻了个白眼。
I took a deep breath and shifted Renesmee’s weight to one arm. I put my left hand in his — he didn’t even flinch at the feel of my cool skin. “If I don’t kill Charlie tonight, I’ll consider forgiving you for this.”
我深深的吸了一口气，把蕾妮斯梅转移到我另一只手上。用左手握起他的——碰到我冰冷的肌肤，他甚至没有缩一下。“如果今晚我没有伤害查理，我才会考虑原谅你做的一切。”
“I’m actually holding her so that my hands aren’t free to kill you, Jacob. Maybe later.” He sighed but didn’t push me on it. Wise of him.
“其实，我抱着她是因为这样我就没手去杀你，所以我想，可能得晚点，雅各布。”他叹了叹气但没逼我。还比较明智。
He held out his other hand toward Renesmee, a request this time. “Can I?”
他朝蕾妮斯梅伸出另一手，这次是个请求：“可以吗？”
Alice raced back through the door then, her hands full and her expression promising violence.
爱丽丝回来了，手上拿着一大堆东西，表情无比的暴躁。
“You, you, and you,” she snapped, glaring at the werewolves. “If you must stay, get over in the corner and commit to being there for a while. I need to see. Bella, you’d better give him the baby, too. You’ll need your arms free, anyway.”
“你，你，还有你，”她喊道，扫了一眼狼人：“如果你想留下了，就去那边角落坐着反省一段时间。我得看看，贝拉，你还是让他抱着宝宝比较好。你有其他事要做，无论如何。”
Jacob grinned in triumph.
雅各布大声欢呼起来。
Undiluted fear ripped through my stomach as the enormity of what I was about to do hit me. I was going to gamble on my iffy self-control with my pure human father as the guinea pig. Edward’s earlier words crashed in my ears again.
突然之间我的胃抽搐起来，对将要发生暴行感到一股无法抑制的恐惧。我居然拿自己单纯的人类父亲的生命来赌博，考验自己那尚不确定的自我控制，跟头几内亚猪一样。爱德华早前的话又在我耳边响起：
I couldn’t imagine the pain of failure. My breathing turned to gasps.
我不能想象如果我失败了，那时的痛苦会有多大。我的呼吸越来越快几乎是在喘气了。
“Take her,” I whispered, sliding Renesmee into Jacob’s arms.
“抱着她。”我小声说，让蕾妮斯梅睡到雅各布的怀里。
Did you consider the physical pain you’re putting Bella through, even if she can resist? Or the emotional pain if she doesn’t?
你有想过你让贝拉承受的身体上的伤痛会有多大吗，即使她能控制住？还是说如果她控制不住时，精神上的惨痛折磨？
He nodded, concern wrinkling his forehead. He gestured to the others, and they all went to the far corner of the room. Seth and Jake slouched on the floor at once, but Leah shook her head and pursed her lips.
他点点头，担心在额头上聚集。接着他做了个手势，房里其他人都退到角落去。塞思和杰克马上无精打采的坐在地上，但利亚甩了甩脑袋嘴唇动了一下。
“Am I allowed to leave?” she griped. She looked uncomfortable in her human body, wearing the same dirty t-shirt and cotton shorts she’d worn to shriek at me the other day, her short hair sticking up in irregular tufts. Her hands were still shaking.
“我能离开吗？”她紧张的问。人类的形态似乎让她很不舒服，她穿着同一件脏兮兮的T恤和纯棉短裤，不太想和我吵架，脑袋上乱糟糟的长着一丛一丛的短发，但手一直在颤抖着。
“Before you left on the honeymoon. I was prepared for several possible futures.”
“在你去度蜜月之前。我就开始对好几个未来做准备了。”
Edward was back at my side, stroking my face. “You can do this. I know you can. I’ll help you; we all will.”
爱德华回到我身边轻抚着我的脸说：“你能做到的，我知道你能行。而且我会帮你的，我们都会帮你。”
Alice held out her hand. There was a small white box on her palm. “These will irritate your eyes — they won’t hurt, but they’ll cloud your vision. It’s annoying. They also won’t match your old color, but it’s still better than bright red, right?”
爱丽丝伸出手，掌心放着一个白色的小盒子：“它们能挡住你眼睛的颜色——没什么伤害，但会让视力变得模糊，很烦人。当然，跟你原来的颜色不一样，可还是比亮红色好，不是吗？”
She flipped the contact box into the air and I caught it. “When did you –“
她把盒子扔过来，我接着了。“你什么时候——”
“Of course,” Jake said.
“当然，”杰克说。
I met Edward’s eyes with panic screaming from my face. Was he strong enough to stop me if I made a wrong move?
我那惊恐的脑袋直直的面向爱德华的眼睛，如果我走错一步他能制止住我吗？
“If I didn’t believe you could handle it, we’d disappear today. This very minute. But you can. And you’ll be happier if you can have Charlie in your life.”
“如果我不相信你能处理好，我们今天就会消失。就在这一分钟。但是你可以。如果你的生活中能有查理，你会更快乐。”
I nodded and opened the container. I’d never worn contacts before, but it couldn’t be that hard. I took the little brown quarter-sphere and pressed it, concave side in, to my eye.
我点点头打开盒子，虽然以前从来没戴过隐形眼镜，但应该不会太难。轻轻的拿起这褐色的半球面，凹面对着眼睛，戴上去。
I tried to slow my breathing.
努力平和下自己的呼吸。
“Stay east so you don’t cross Charlie’s path,” Alice added.
“去东边，那样你就不会遇到查理。”爱丽丝加了一句。
Leah didn’t look at Alice; she ducked out the back door and stomped into the bushes to phase.
利亚没有回头看爱丽丝一眼，直接踏着重重的步子走出后门，边变身变穿过灌木丛。
I blinked, and a film interrupted my sight. I could see through it, of course, but I could also see the texture of the thin screen. My eye kept focusing on the microscopic scratches and warped sections.
我眨眨眼睛，像在眼睛里看电影一样，我能透过它看到东西，但当然，也能看到它上面的纹理。眼睛聚焦在那原本应该在显微镜下才能看到的细小裂痕和扭曲的小片段。
“Charlie will be here in five minutes. Keep it simple.”
“查理会在五分钟之内到这里，放轻松点。”
“I see what you mean,” I murmured as I stuck the other one in. I tried to not blink this time. My eye automatically wanted to dislodge the obstruction.
“我明白你的意思了，”我对自己说，边把另一个也戴上，试图不去眨眼。但自己的眼睛一直想把这异物驱逐出去。
“How do I look?”
“看起来怎么样？”
“How long do I have?”
“还有多久？”
“Yes, yes, she always looks gorgeous,” Alice finished his thought impatiently. “It’s better than red, but that’s the highest commendation I can give. Muddy brown. Your brown was much prettier. Keep in mind that those won’t last forever — the venom in your eyes will dissolve them in a few hours. So if Charlie stays longer than that, you’ll have to excuse yourself to replace them. Which is a good idea anyway, because humans need bathroom breaks.” She shook her head. “Esme, give her a few pointers on acting human while I stock the powder room with contacts.”
“好了，好了，她一直都是这么光彩照人，”爱丽丝不耐烦的抢先把他的话说完：“比红色要好些，但这已经是我能说的最好听的话了。泥坑的棕色。你原来的褐色要可爱多了。但记住这不会持续很长时间——你眼睛里的毒素会在几小时内腐蚀掉它们。所以如果查理待的时间比那更长，你得找借口让他动下。还好，人类总是需要解决下生理问题。”她摇摇头：“埃斯梅，给她点提示如何做的更像人类，我去下化妆间，保持联系。”
Edward smiled. “Gorgeous. Of course –“
爱德华微笑着说：“光彩照人，当然——”
“And blink at least three times a minute,” Emmett said. He frowned, then darted to where the television remote sat on the end table. He flipped the TV on to a college football game and nodded to himself.
“还有每分钟至少要眨3次眼，”埃美特皱着眉头说，接着走到后面那张桌子上放着的遥控器前，打开电视换到一个大学生橄榄球比赛节目上，才点点头。
“Cross your legs for about five minutes, then switch to crossing your ankles for the next five,” Rosalie said.
“每5分钟摆下手臂，或是换下脚。”罗莎莉说。
Esme nodded once and came to take my hand. “The main thing is not to sit too still or move too fast,” she told me.
埃斯梅点了一下头，走过来拉起我的手：“主要就是不要坐的太僵硬，还有不要动得太快。”她告诉我。
“Sit down if he does,” Emmett interjected. “Humans don’t like to just stand there.”
“如果他坐下了，你也得跟着坐，”埃美特插嘴道：“人类好像不喜欢干站着。”
“Let your eyes wander every thirty seconds or so,” Jasper added. “Humans don’t stare at one thing for too long.”
“让你的眼睛每隔30分钟放松一下，”贾斯帕加了句：“人类也不会盯着某样东西看很久。”
“Move your hands, too. Brush your hair back or pretend to scratch something,” Jasper said.
“手也得动动，抓下头发或挠下痒什么的。”贾斯帕说。
“I said Esme,” Alice complained as she returned. “You’ll overwhelm her.”
“我说让埃斯梅来教，”爱丽丝回来了，抱怨道：“你们一次过要她做太多事了。”
I nodded once at each suggestion. I’d noticed them doing some of these things yesterday. I thought I could mimic their actions.
每听到一句建议我就点下头，昨天就注意到他们做着其中一些动作，我想我能模仿他们的动作。
“No, I think I got it all,” I said. “Sit, look around, blink, fidget.”
“没有，我觉得我都记住了，”我说：“坐下，周围看看，眨眼，表现得烦躁些。”
“Right,” Esme approved. She hugged my shoulders.
“对，”埃斯梅搂着我的肩膀鼓励道。
Jasper frowned. “You’ll be holding your breath as much as possible, but you need to move your shoulders a little to make it look like you’re breathing.”
贾斯帕皱了下眉：“你尽量不要呼吸，但得让肩膀起伏一下假装自己在呼吸。”
Edward hugged me on my free side. “You can do this,” he repeated, murmuring the encouragement in my ear.
爱德华在另一边搂着我：“你能做到的。”边弯下腰对着我的耳朵重复了一遍。
“Two minutes,” Alice said. “Maybe you should start out already on the couch. You’ve been sick, after all. That way he won’t have to see you move right at first.”
“两分钟，”爱丽丝说：“要不你坐到沙发上去吧，毕竟之前你生了很重的病。这样，他就不用马上看到你的动作。”
I inhaled once and then nodded again.
我马上吸了口气，然后点了点头。
“Jacob, I need Renesmee,” I said.
“雅各布，我需要蕾妮斯梅在我身边。”我恳求的说。
Alice shook her head. “Bella, that doesn’t help me see.”
爱丽丝摇了摇头：“贝拉，那样我就看不见之后的情况了。”
Alice pulled me to the sofa. I tried to move slowly, to make my limbs more clumsy. She rolled her eyes, so I must not have been doing a good job.
爱丽丝推着我坐到沙发上，我让自己一步一步慢动作前进，同时让四肢显得笨拙一些。她翻了个白眼，这么说我应该做得还不错。
Jacob frowned, unmoving.
雅各布皱着眉头，没动。
“Fine,” Alice groaned. “Hold her as still as you can and I’ll try to see around her.” She sighed wearily, like she’d been asked to work overtime on a holiday. Jacob sighed, too, but brought Renesmee to me, and then retreated quickly from Alice’s glare.
“好吧，”爱丽丝无奈的说：“抱着她尽量别动，我看看能不能透过她周围的情况来猜猜后面的事。”她疲惫的叹了口气，在这个假期里她似乎一直在超负荷工作。雅各布在那边也叹了口气，但还是把蕾妮斯梅送过来，接着就在爱丽丝的瞪视下迅速退开。
“But I need her. She keeps me calm.” The edge of panic in my voice was unmistakable.
“但我需要她，她能让我镇静下来。”我声音里尖锐的惊慌让人无法忽视。
“Can she understand you?” I whispered.
“她能明白你说的话吗？”我悄悄的问。
“Renesmee, someone special is coming to see you and your mother,” he said in a solemn voice, as if he expected her to understand every word. Did she? She looked back at him with clear, grave eyes. “But he’s not like us, or even like Jacob. We have to be very careful with him. You shouldn’t tell him things the way you tell us.”
“蕾妮斯梅，有个非常特殊的人要来看你和妈妈，”他郑重的说，希望她能听懂自己所说的每个字，她能吗？她用那宝石般清澈透明的眼睛回望着爱德华。“但是他和我们不一样，也跟雅各布不同。我们对他要非常非常小心才行。当你跟他说话的时候，不能现在和我们说话的方式。”
Edward took a seat beside me and put his arms around Renesmee and me. He leaned forward and looked Renesmee very seriously in the eyes.
爱德华在我旁边坐下，搂起蕾妮斯梅和我两个。接着向蕾妮斯梅靠近了一点，相当严肃的看着她的眼睛。
Renesmee touched his face.
蕾妮斯梅摸着他的脸。
“She understands. You’ll be careful, won’t you, Renesmee? You’ll help us?” Renesmee touched him again.
“能。你会小心的，对吗，蕾妮斯梅？你会帮我们的，对吗？”蕾妮斯梅把手又放回到他脸上。
“No, I don’t care if you bite Jacob. That’s fine.” Jacob chuckled.
“不不，咬雅各布没关系，他随你喜欢就好。”雅各布暗笑。
“Exactly,” he said. “And he’s going to make you thirsty. But you mustn’t bite him. He won’t heal like Jacob.”
“没错，”他说：“而且他会让你感觉非常口渴，不过你一定不能咬他，他没有雅各布那样的自愈能力。”
“Maybe you should leave, Jacob,” Edward said coldly, glaring in his direction. Edward hadn’t forgiven Jacob, because he knew that no matter what happened now, I was going to be hurting. But I’d take the burn happily if that were the worst thing I’d face tonight.
“我看你是不是应该先离开，雅各布。”爱德华望向雅各布冷淡的问，他还没有原谅雅各布，知道无论怎样我会经历一次疼痛的折磨。但如果这就是最坏的情况的话，我会欣然接受的。
“Moral support,” Edward scoffed. “As far as Charlie knows, you’re the most repulsive monster of us all.”
“精神支持？”爱德华嘲笑道：“似乎据查理所知，你是我们中间最恶心的怪物。”
I concentrated on the steady thrumming of Renesmee’s heart to calm myself. It worked pretty quickly.
我把注意力集中到蕾妮斯梅那平稳轻松的心跳声上，试图冷静下来，结果证明这非常有效。
“I told Charlie I’d be here,” Jacob said. “He needs the moral support.”
“我告诉查理我会在这儿陪他，”雅各布说：“他需要精神支持。”
Edward tightened his arm over my shoulders.
爱德华把搂着我肩膀的手紧了一下。
“Well done, Bella,” Jasper whispered in approval.
“干得好，贝拉。”贾斯帕轻轻的赞扬道。
I heard the tires turn off the highway onto the quiet, damp earth of the Cullens’ drive, and my breathing spiked again. My heart ought to have been hammering. It made me anxious that my body didn’t have the right reactions.
听到轮胎从高速公路上下来，驶上Cullen家门口那条安静的湿土路的声音，我的呼吸又一次停下来，心脏像锤子一样沉重猛烈的跳动。这让我担心起自己身体的反应。
“You’re sure?” I asked him.
“你确定要这么做吗？”我问他。
“Positive. You can do anything.” He smiled and kissed me.
“非常确定。什么困难都难不倒你。”他笑了一个然后亲了一下我。
“Repulsive?” Jake protested, and then he laughed quietly to himself.
“最恶心？”杰克大声kangyi，但接着就自己笑起来。
It wasn’t precisely a peck on the lips, and my wild vampiric reactions took me off guard yet again. Edward’s lips were like a shot of some addictive chemical straight into my nervous system. I was instantly craving more. It took all my concentration to remember the baby in my arms.
对我来说这远远不止是嘴唇上的一次轻啄，吸血鬼的野性马上取代了一直围绕在脑海周围的警戒心。爱德华的唇就像给我的神经系统打了一针毒品，我几乎本能的想要更多更多，用尽全部力气才记起来怀里的宝宝。
The sound of Charlie’s cruiser got closer and closer. The second of levity passed, and everyone was still. I crossed my legs and practiced my blinks.
查理那辆巡逻车的声音越来越近了。刚才轻浮的心情马上消失的无影无踪，所有人都一动不动的站在那儿。我试着摆了摆手臂，练习下眨眼。
I laughed. That had been my line from the very beginning, from the very first kiss.
我闷笑着，从最开始，我们的初吻开始，这就一直是我的逆鳞。
Emmett laughed.
埃美特低头闷笑。
“Sorry, Jasper.”
“对不起，贾斯帕。”
Knock, knock, knock.
咚，咚，咚。
“Right.” I pushed the trembly feelings away. Charlie, that was the main thing now. Keep Charlie safe today. We would have all night…
“好。”我答应，让战栗的渴望退去。查理才是现在最重要的事。今天一定要让查理平安回去，然后我们还有整晚——
“Later,” I said, and anticipation curled my stomach into a ball.
“迟一点，”我说，胃突然因为渴望而抽搐起来。
Jasper felt my mood change. “Er, Edward, you might not want to distract her like that right now. She needs to be able to focus.”
贾斯帕感觉到我剧变的情绪：“呃……爱德华，你不能再这样让她分心了。她得全神贯注才行。”
“Focus, Bella,” Jasper urged.
“全神贯注，贝拉。”贾斯帕焦急的叫道。
The car pulled in front of the house and idled for a few seconds. I wondered if Charlie was as nervous as I was. Then the engine cut off, and a door slammed. Three steps across the grass, and then eight echoing thuds against the wooden stairs. Four more echoing footsteps across the porch. Then silence. Charlie took two deep breaths.
车子开进了院子，但在那儿停了好一会儿，让我觉得查理是不是和我一样紧张。接着引擎熄了，车门被用力关上。三声脚步声是走过草坪时发出的，然后是上楼梯的四声，接着又是四声门廊那边传来的。最后是一片寂静，查理深深的呼吸了两下。
“Bella.”
“贝拉！”
Edward pulled away. “Oops,” he said.
爱德华伸直身子拉开了点距离：“哦，天！”
I read the emotions as they scrolled across his face.
我马上知道他是什么心情，它们在他脸上蔓延着。
“Right here, Dad.”
“在这儿，爸爸。”
Ugh! My voice was so wrong. Plus, I’d used up some of my air supply. I gulped in a quick refill, glad that Charlie’s scent had not saturated the room yet.
天！我的声音是这么奇怪，而且还几乎用尽了胸腔内的空气。我马上吸了口气，庆幸查理的气味还没把整间房填满。
“Carlisle,” Charlie greeted him stiffly. “Where’s Bella?”
“卡莱尔，”查理僵硬的问：“贝拉呢？”
“Is that you, Bella?” he whispered.
“是你吗，贝拉？”他不敢相信的悄声问。
Charlie’s blank expression told me how off my voice was. His eyes zeroed in on me and widened.
查理空白的表情告诉我到底刚才的声音有多不对劲，他的眼睛在我脸上聚焦然后瞪得大大的。
Carlisle answered the door. His stressed expression changed to one of welcome, like switching the channel on the TV.
卡莱尔去开门，他紧张的表情瞬间变成欢迎的笑脸，就像有人用遥控器对他的脸换了个频道一样。
“Hello, Charlie,” he said, looking appropriately abashed. After all, we were supposed to be in Atlanta at the Center for Disease Control. Charlie knew he’d been lied to.
“你好，查理，”他恰当的表现出一点点不好意思，毕竟我们现在应该在亚特兰大的疾病控制中心，查理也知道他撒谎了。
I bit my lip. It felt funny. My new teeth were sharper against my granite skin than my human teeth had been against my soft human lips.
我咬着下唇，这个动作有点搞笑——我新的牙齿对于现在花岗岩般的皮肤来说，甚至比那时我人类的牙齿对当时的嘴唇来说，还要锋利。
Shock. Disbelief. Pain. Loss. Fear. Anger. Suspicion. More pain.
震惊，不相信，痛苦，失去，害怕，愤怒，怀疑，还有更多的痛苦。
I inhaled for what might be the last time. Renesmee nestled deeper into my arms, hiding her face in my hair.
我为接下来有可能变成最后一面的团聚，而吸了一口冷气。蕾妮斯梅在我怀里靠得更近了，把自己的脸藏在我的头发里。
His jaw locked.
他绷紧下巴。
“Bella?” he asked again.
“贝拉？”他又叫了一声。
I steeled myself, focused on Renesmee’s warm weight, leaned into Edward for support, and took a deep breath.
我绷紧身体，集中精神想着温暖的蕾妮斯梅，靠紧爱德华好获得力量，然后深吸了一口气。
“Hey, Charlie,” Jacob greeted him from the corner. “How’re things?”
“嗨，查理，”雅各布从角落里跟他打着招呼：“怎么样？”
He took a deep breath to steady himself.
他深深的吸了口气才能继续站着。
That was it for my oxygen.
氧气用尽了。
“I’m sorry, Dad,” I said.
“非常抱歉，老爸。”我说。
“Are you okay?” he demanded.
“你现在没事吧？”他急迫的问。
Charlie’s scent was a fistful of flames, punching straight down my throat. But it was so much more than pain. It was a hot stabbing of desire, too. Charlie smelled more delicious than anything I’d ever imagined. As appealing as the anonymous hikers had been on the hunt, Charlie was doubly tempting. And he was just a few feet away, leaking mouthwatering heat and moisture into the dry air.
查理的气味点燃了我身体的火焰，狠狠的撞击着我的喉咙。可是，这比远远不止是疼痛，还伴有更多火热尖锐的渴望。查理比我想象的所有东西都要香，起码有我打猎时碰到的徒步旅行者两倍诱人。而且他离我只有几步远，在这片干燥的空气中，散发着让人口水直流的温度和气味。
“Really and truly great,” I promised. “Healthy as a horse.”
“真的真的非常好，”我保证道：“像马一样健康。”
I spoke in a lower voice, trying to keep the ring out of it. “It’s really me.”
我低哑的说，试图消去声音里风铃的感觉：“真的是我。”
“Jake told me this was… necessary. That you were dying.” He said the words like he didn’t believe them one bit.
“杰克告诉我。来见你是……必要的，他说你快死了。”他这样说着，像是不相信他们所说的每一个字。
“Yep.” I winced at my wind-chime voice. “Hi, Dad.”
“是的。”我为自己那风铃般的声音而畏缩：“嗨，老爸。”
Slowly, Charlie walked across the room until he was a few feet away from me. He darted an accusing glare at Edward, and then his eyes flickered back to me. The warmth of his body heat beat against me with each pulse of his heart.
慢慢的，查理从房那边走来，在我身前的几步处停下来。他给了爱德华一个指责的眼神，接着目光闪烁的看着我。那温暖的身体里，心脏的每一次跳动都像在狠狠的抽打着我。
Charlie glowered at Jacob once, shuddered at a memory, and then stared at me again.
查理马上瞪了雅各布一眼，愤怒的颤抖了一会儿，还是继续注视着我。
“My niece,” Edward lied smoothly. He must have decided that the resemblance between Renesmee and him was too pronounced to be ignored. Best to claim they were related from the beginning.
“我侄女。”爱德华很自然的说着谎话，知道自己和蕾妮斯梅长得太像，查理不可能没注意到，还不如从一开始就说明两人是有血缘关系的。
“That makes one of you,” Charlie growled.
“但这不是你！”查理吼道。
“I lost my parents. My older brother was adopted, like me. I never saw him after that. But the courts located me when he and his wife died in a car accident, leaving their only child without any other family.”
“我没有父母，哥哥也被收养的了，跟我一样，从那以后我就再没见过他。但前段时间法院通知我说他和他妻子都死于一场交通事故，留下一个孤女没人照顾。”
Edward squeezed my shoulders sympathetically, and Jacob shot an apologetic glance at me across the room.
爱德华死死的搂着我，怜爱的看着我；而雅各布抱歉的眼神从屋子那头送来。
I hoped Charlie could see past the changes in my new face to read the remorse there.
我真的希望查理能透过我这陌生的脸，看到我深深的自责。
“Jacob was telling you the truth.”
“雅各布告诉你的都是事实。”
I tried to collect myself and ignore the pain and longing of the thirst. Charlie was waiting for my answer.
我努力捡回理智和集中力，尽量忽略喉咙的疼痛和口干的渴望。查理还在等着我的回答。
“I thought you’d lost your family,” Charlie said, accusation returning to his voice.
“我以为你们都已经失去家人了。”查理怀疑的问。
Under my hair, Renesmee sniffed as Charlie’s scent registered with her, too. I tightened my grip on her.
头发下面，蕾妮斯梅也嗅着查理的味道来记住他，我抱着她的手紧了紧。
But I wasn’t hunting now. And this was my father.
但我现在并不是在捕猎，而且他是我父亲。
Charlie saw my anxious glance down and followed it. “Oh,” he said, and all the anger fell off his face, leaving only shock behind. “This is her. The orphan Jacob said you’re adopting.”
查理看到我低下头时焦虑的眼神，也跟着往下看：“噢，”他说，愤怒从脸上退去只留下震惊，“就是她，雅各布说的那个被你们领养的孤儿。”
“She’s… she’s, well, she’s a beauty.”
“她……她，呃，她很可爱。”
“Hmph. Well.” He shook his head absently. “Jake says you call her Nessie?”
“嗯……当然。”他心不在焉的摇摇头：“杰克说她叫内希？”
“Yes,” Edward agreed.
“是的，”爱德华同意。
Charlie frowned. “You gonna make me a grandpa so young?”
查理皱了皱眉毛：“你要让我这么年轻就当外公吗？”
Renesmee peeked out from under my hair, sniffing again. She glanced shyly at Charlie from under her long lashes, then hid again.
蕾妮斯梅在我的头发下偷看着，又嗅了一次。她害羞的瞄着他，目光从长长的睫毛下透出，然后又飞快的藏起来。
Edward smiled. “Carlisle is a grandfather, too.”
爱德华笑了：“卡莱尔也做祖父了。”
Edward was so good at this. His voice was even, with just the right amount of innocence. I needed practice so that I could do that.
爱德华太擅长这个了，他的声音里甚至还带着点天真的无辜，看来我也得好好练习下这本领。
Charlie refocused on me. “How do you feel about this? Maybe Carlisle and Esme could –“
查理重新注视着我：“你觉得怎么样？或许卡莱尔和埃斯梅可以——”
“No, we don’t,” I said, my voice too sharp and piercing. “Her name is Renesmee.”
“不，我们没起这样的名字，”我尖锐刺激的叫道：“她叫蕾妮斯梅。”
“She’s mine,” I interrupted. “I want her.”
“她是我的，”我打断他说：“我想要她。”
Charlie shot an incredulous glance at Carlisle, still standing by the front door; he looked like Zeus’s younger, better-looking brother.
查理充满不信任的扫了一眼卡莱尔——他仍然站在门前，看上去像宙斯年轻英俊的小兄弟。
“What else could we do?” Edward brushed his fingers lightly over her cheek. I saw him touch her lips for just a moment — a reminder. “Would you have refused her?”
“我们还能怎么办？”爱德华的手指在她脸上画了画，在唇上停了一会——一个提醒。“换做你，会拒绝吗？”
“Kind of a big responsibility, though. You two are just getting started.”
“不过也是个巨大的责任，你们俩才刚开始。”
Charlie snorted and then laughed. “I guess that does sort of make me feel better.” His eyes strayed back to Renesmee. “She sure is something to look at.” His warm breath blew lightly across the space between us.
查理嗤了下鼻子笑出来，“这的确让我觉得好受了一些，”目光回到蕾妮斯梅身上：“她肯定在看着什么东西。”查理温暖的气息在我们之间弥漫开来。
Renesmee leaned toward the smell, shaking off my hair and looking him full in the face for the first time.
蕾妮斯梅顺着气味抬起头，抓着我的头发摇了摇，第一次真正看着他。
Charlie gasped.
查理大喘了口气。
I knew what he was seeing. My eyes — his eyes — copied exactly into her perfect face.
我知道他在看什么，我的眼睛——他的眼睛——都注视着她完美可爱的小脸蛋儿。
Jacob got up and came over to pat Charlie on the back. He leaned in to whisper something in Charlie’s ear; only Charlie didn’t know we could all hear.
雅各布站起身走过来，轻拍着查理让他退后几步。接着弯下腰在查理耳边窃窃私语，只有查理不知道我们都能听见他们在讲什么。
Charlie started hyperventilating. His lips trembled, and I could read the numbers he mouthed. He was counting backward, trying to fit nine months into one. Trying to put it together but not able to force the evidence right in front of him to make any sense.
查理开始喘不过气来，嘴唇颤抖着，我能明白他说不出的话。他在向后数着数，试图在一天之内适应原本需要九个月时间的事。想弄清楚一切，但没办法想象出前面这个小证据有任何意义。
Charlie swallowed and nodded. And then his eyes blazed as he took a step closer to Edward with his fists tightly clenched.
查理吞了口口水，点点头。接着眼里燃烧起熊熊的火焰，握紧拳头走到爱德华前面。
“Need to know, Charlie. It’s okay. I promise.”
“你得记住，查理。一切都会没事的，我保证。”
“I don’t want to know everything, but I’m done with the lies!”
“我不想知道每一个细节。但是我对谎言已经没有任何耐心了。”
“Would it really have made this any easier?”
“如果是，能让事情更容易接受些吗？”
The room was full of statues. I crossed my ankles.
房间里的人好像都变成了雕像，只有我动了动脚移动了下重心。
“I’m sorry,” Edward said calmly, “but you need to know the public story more than you need to know the truth. If you’re going to be part of this secret, the public story is the one that counts. It’s to protect Bella and Renesmee as well as the rest of us. Can you go along with the lies for them?”
“我很抱歉，”爱德华冷静的说：“但比起真相，你更需要知道的反而是那种广而告之的公众版故事。如果你想成为秘密的一员，公众故事才是能算数的，这更是为了保护贝拉和蕾妮斯梅，还有我们所有人。为了他们，你能接受这个善意的谎言吗？”
He frowned, and then he knelt on the floor in front of me. I could see the movement of the blood in his neck under his skin. I could feel the warm vibration of it.
他皱着眉，颓然的在我面前跪在地上。我能看见他脖子处的皮肤下血液流动的样子，我能感觉得到那种温暖的诱惑。
“Whoa,” Charlie gasped, his eyes on her perfect teeth. “How old is she?”
“哇，”查理惊叹了口气，盯着她整齐的牙齿看：“她多大了？”
Charlie huffed once and then turned his glare on me. “You might’ve given me some warning, kid.”
查理怒气高涨，转过身盯着我：“你应该早点给我些提示的，孩子？”
So could Renesmee. She smiled and reached one pink palm out to him. I held her back. She pushed her other hand against my neck, thirst, curiosity, and Charlie’s face in her thoughts. There was a subtle edge to the message that made me think that she’d understood Edward’s words perfectly; she acknowledged thirst, but overrode it in the same thought.
蕾妮斯梅也可以。她笑起来，对他伸出一只白里透红的小手。我马上把她塞回去，于是她把另一只手发在我脖子上，干渴，好奇，还有查理的脸，在她脑海里盘旋。一个微笑的细节让我觉得她真的听懂了爱德华的话：她注意到自己的干渴，但马上制止了它。
Charlie blinked spastically.
查理像抽筋一样直眨眼。
“Ungh!” Charlie protested, covering his ears. “Never mind.”
“喂！”查理捂着耳朵：“别管我。”
Charlie cringed away from the contact.
查理飞快的躲开他的碰触。
My dad mumbled something unintelligible.
我老爸自己嘟哝着谁都听不懂的话。
“Well, I could tell you all about it — Billy knows absolutely everything — but it involves a lot of stuff about werewo –“
“那个，我只能说——比利绝对知道所有事——包括更多关于狼……”
“Three months,” Edward said, and then added slowly, “rather, she’s the size of a three — month-old, more or less. She’s younger in some ways, more mature in others.”
“三个月，”爱德华说，接着又补充了一句：“左右。她看起来大概是三个月，但从某方面来说又比那年轻，从另一方面来讲又成熟很多。”
“Um…”
“呃……”
Jacob elbowed him. “Told you she was special, didn’t I?”
雅各布用手肘推了推他：“都说她很特别咯，不是吗？”
The reminder made Charlie’s lips go white, but he nodded once. “Just what is your part in all this, Jake?” he asked. “How much does Billy know? Why are you here?” He looked at Jacob’s face, which was glowing as he stared at Renesmee.
这提醒让查理的嘴唇变得惨白，但他还是点点头：“你掺和了多少在这里面，杰克？”他问：“比利知道多少？你为什么在这里？”他凝视着雅各布因为看见蕾妮斯梅而变得通红的脸。
Jacob grinned. “Everything’s going to be great, Charlie. Just try to not believe anything you see.”
雅各布咧嘴笑起来：“一切都会好起来的，查理。别相信你所看到的东西就成。”
Very deliberately, Renesmee waved at him.
蕾妮斯梅很镇静的冲他挥挥手。
“Oh, c’mon, Charlie,” Jacob groaned. “I’m the same person I’ve always been. Just pretend this afternoon didn’t happen.”
“噢，别这样，查理，”雅各布抱怨：“我还是原来那个我。就假装今天下午啥事也没发生，不行吗。”
I fought back a hiss. In front of Charlie? That was over the line.
我回了他大大的嘘声，在查理面前拿分？绝对不可能。
Charlie recovered, then looked at Emmett over his shoulder. “Florida winning?”
查理恢复正常，然后望着埃美特：“佛罗里达赢了？”
Jacob and Charlie jumped. The rest of us froze.
雅各布和查理猛地蹦起来，其他人都傻眼呆住了。
“Just scored the first touchdown,” Emmett confirmed. He shot a look in my direction, wagging his eyebrows like a villain in vaudeville. “‘Bout time somebody scored around here.”
“只是拿到第一个达阵得分，”埃美特肯定，他得意洋洋的看着我，眉毛挤的跟搞笑剧场里的小丑一样：“这一回合有人在这里拿分了。”
“Woo!” Emmett suddenly boomed in his deep bass. “Go Gators!”
“哇！”埃美特突然用他的男低音吼了一句：“上啊，鳄鱼人！”（给他们支持的球队加油时经常说的话——Go Gators！）
But Charlie was beyond noticing innuendos. He took yet another deep breath, sucking the air in like he was trying to pull it down to his toes. I envied him. He lurched to his feet, stepped around Jacob, and half-fell into an open chair. “Well,” he sighed, “I guess we should see if they can hold on to the lead.”
但查理完全没注意到话语里的讽刺，深深深深的吸了口气，像是要让脚指头都呼吸到新鲜空气一样，我有点嫉妒了。他蹒跚着绕雅各布转了几步，然后半瘫在露天长椅上，叹着气说：“好吧，我猜我得看看你们是不是能坚持到最后胜利。”
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