第十六章 |《荆棘之城》双语小说免费在线阅读

I watched as the roads began to be busier and the country hedges began to give way to palings and walls; I watched the leaf become brick, the grass become cinders and dust, the ditches kerb-stones.

我盯着路面，道路上越来越繁忙，乡村篱笆开始为栏栅和围墙所取代；我看到树叶变成了砖石，青草变成了炉灰和尘土，水沟变成了路牙石。

Still, it took all that day to reach it. We might have found out the rail-way station and taken a train: but I thought we ought to keep the little money we had left, for food. We walked for a while with a boy who had a great big basket on his back, that he had filled with onions: he showed us to a place where waggons came, to pick up vegetables for the city markets. We had missed the best of the traffic, but we got a ride, in the end, with a man with a slow horse, taking scarlet beans to Hammersmith. He said Charles made him think of his son — Charles had that sort of face — so I let them ride up front together, and sat in the back of the cart, with the beans. I sat with my cheek against a crate, my eyes on the road ahead, and now and then the road would rise and show us London again, grown a little nearer. I might have slept; but I couldn’t keep from watching.

我们还是花了一整天的时间，才走到伦敦。本来可以找个火车站，坐火车去：可是我觉得我们应该留住仅剩的一点钱，去买吃的。我们跟着一个小男孩走了一段路，他背上背了个很大的篮筐，筐里装满洋葱：他给我们指了个地方，那儿有货车，专门往伦敦的菜市场运蔬菜。我们错过了最合适的交通车，不过最后，我们还是搭上了车，跟着一个人和一匹慢悠悠的马。拉着红花菜豆去海默史密斯（Hammersmith）。他说查尔斯让他想起他的儿子——查尔斯就长着那么一张小脸——所以我让他们一起坐在前面驾车，我坐在后面车厢里，跟豆子在一起。我脸靠着一个板条箱，眼睛盯着前面的路，那条路会时不时地上个坡，然后再把伦敦送到我们眼前，路变得越来越窄。我本该睡一会儿；可是我无法不保持警醒。

From Hammersmith, we walked. That part of London was strange to me, but I found I knew my way all right — just as I had known, in the country, which road to take at a fork. Charles walked beside me, blinking, and sometimes catching hold of the cuff of my sleeve; in the end I took his hand to lead him across a street, and he let his fingers stay there. I saw us reflected in the glass of a great shop window — me in my bonnet, him in his plain pea-jacket — we looked like the Babes in the bloody Wood.

从海默史密斯开始，我们又步行。伦敦的这些地方于我是陌生的，不过我发现我完全知道该走哪条路——就好象先前在乡下，遇到岔路口，我都知道该走哪条路一样。查尔斯走在我身边，眨巴着眼睛，有时候还抓住我的袖子；最后，我抓住他的手，带他穿过一条街道，他就乖乖地让我抓着手。我在一家大商店的橱窗玻璃反光中看到我们俩——我戴着帽子，他穿着不起眼的粗呢上衣——我们俩活象一对闯进恐怖树林（The Bloody Wood）里的傻宝（Babes）。

When once the cart drew close to the side of a house that was pasted, two inches thick, with fluttering bills, I reached and tore free a strip of poster — held it for a second, then let it fly. It had a picture of a hand upon it, holding a pistol. It left soot on my fingers. Then I knew I was home.

有一回，马车路过一幢房子，房子上贴着一层层的海报，有两寸厚，不停地飘动着，马车靠近房子的时候，我伸出手来，从海报上扯下一条来——抓在手里，停了一秒钟，便撒手放开，任其飞扬。那上面有一副画，画着一只手，手上抓着一把发令枪。那张纸条在我手上留下些煤灰痕迹。于是我便知道，我到家了。

“Wait, Charles,” I said, putting my hand to my heart and turning away from him. I did not want him to see me so stirred up. But then, the sharpest part of my feelings being over, I began to think.

“等等，查尔斯，”我说道，我将手放到心口上，转身跑开。我不想他看到我如此心绪激荡。可是随后，我情绪中最强烈最迅疾的部分就消散了，我开始思考。

Then we reached Westminster, and got our first proper view of the river; and I had to stop.

后来我们走到了威斯敏斯特，我们得以第一回正眼看那条河，我不由得停住了脚步。

I took him down a dark and narrow street. But then I thought, a dark and narrow street would be the worst kind of street to be caught in. I turned instead — we were somewhere near Charing Cross now — into the Strand; and after a time we came to the end of a road that had one or two little stalls, selling second-hand clothes. I went to the first we came to, and bought Charles a woollen scarf. For myself, I got a veil.

我带他走进一条阴暗而狭窄的街道。可随后我想到，要是被逮个正着的话，那么阴暗狭窄的街道就会是最惨的一种。我扭头往回走——我们现在已经在查林十字街附近的地方——没有再往河岸旁走；过了一会儿，我们便走到一条马路的尽头，这里有一两个小摊子，卖二手衣裳的。我走到第一个小摊子跟前，给查尔斯买了一条羊毛围巾。给我自己呢，买了个面纱。

“We ought not to cross the water just yet,” I said, as we walked on. I was thinking of who we might bump into. Suppose we chanced upon Gentleman? Or, suppose he chanced upon us? I did not think he would put a hand upon me, himself; but fifteen thousand pounds is a deal of money, and I knew he was up to hiring bullies to do his bad work for him. I had not thought of this, until now. I had thought only of reaching London. I began to look about me, in a new way.

“我们暂时不必过河，”我们一面走，我一面说道。我在想我们会忽然撞见谁。试想一下，要是我们不巧撞见绅士？或者，试想一下，他不巧撞见我们？我不觉得他会亲手碰我一根指头；可一万五千镑钱是一笔巨款，我知道他会雇几个坏蛋帮他干坏事。到这会儿，我才想到这个。先前我只想着赶到伦敦。我开始以一种新的眼光环顾四周。

Charles saw me do it. “What is it, miss?” he said.

查尔斯见我如此。“怎么了？小姐？”他说道。

“Nothing,” I answered. “Only, I’m afraid there may still be men, sent out by Dr Christie. Let’s cut down, here.”

“没事儿，”我答道。“我只是，害怕这儿还是会有，克里斯蒂医生派来的人。我们抄近路过去。”

The man who sold it to me teased me. “Don’t care for a hat, instead?” he said. “Your face is too pretty to hide.”

卖面纱给我的男子嘲弄我。“不喜欢帽子，喜欢这个？”他说道，“你小脸儿这么漂亮，还要藏起来？”

I held out my hand for my half-penny change. “All right,” I said, impatient. “So’s my arse.”

我伸出手，抓过半分尼找零。“是呀，”我不耐烦地说道。“跟我的屁股一样。”

We ended up at St Paul’s. We went in, and I sat in one of the pews while Charles walked about and looked at the statues. I thought, “I must only get to Lant Street, and then I shall be saved”; but what was worrying me was the thought of the story that Gentleman might have put about the Borough.

我们在圣保罗教堂门口停住，走了进去，我在长凳上坐下，查尔斯则在教堂里走来走去，盯着那些雕像看。我心想，“我一定要去蓝特街，也只能去蓝特街，到时候我就有救了”；可一想到绅士会在镇子上散布什么样儿的谣言，我又担心得要命。

It looked badly above my bonnet and pale print gown, but I thought I might pass for a girl with scars, or with some kind of ailment of the face. I made Charles draw the woollen scarf about his mouth and pull down his cap. When he complained that the day was hot I said, “If I get taken by Dr Christie’s spies before I bring you to Mr Rivers, how hot do you think you’ll find it, then?”

面纱衬着我的帽子和灰白衣裳，样子不太好看，不过我觉得，我会被人们当作满脸疤瘌的姑娘，或者脸上有某种疾病。我让查尔斯围上羊毛围巾，遮住嘴巴，再把帽子拉下来。他抱怨天热的时候，我说道，“要是带你找到瑞富斯先生之前，我就被克里斯蒂先生的探子抓住了，你想想到那时候你得感觉多么热？”

He looked ahead, to the crush of coaches and horses at Ludgate Hill. It was six o’clock, and the traffic was at its worst.

他看着前面，看着拥塞在路得盖特山的马车和马匹。现在六点钟，正是交通最拥堵的时候。

“Not much at all. But, we must be careful. I have to think. Let us find somewhere quiet…”

“一点儿也不远。不过，我们一定要小心行事。我得先想好了。让我们先找个安静的地方。”

Charles flinched. I did not care. I put on the veil and felt better.

查尔斯听了，吓了一跳。我可不管。我戴上面纱，感觉好多了。

“Then when will you bring me to him?” he said. “And how much further does he live?”

“那你什么时候带我去找他？”他说道。“他住得有多远？”

I shivered. St Paul’s was cold, even in July. The glass at the windows was losing its colours, as the afternoon turned to night.

我打了个寒战。虽说是七月里，圣保罗教堂还是有点冷。下午变成了晚上，窗户上的玻璃也失却了颜色。

At Dr Christie’s, now, they would be waking us up to take us down to our suppers. We would have breadand-butter, and a pint of tea… Charles came and sat beside me. I heard him sigh. He had his cap in his hands, and his fair hair shone. His lip was perfectly pink. Three boys in white gowns went about with flames on sticks of brass, lighting more lamps and candles; and I looked at him and thought how well he would fit in among them, in a gown of his own.

在克里斯蒂医生那边，这会儿，他们正把我们叫起来，带我们下楼吃晚饭呢。我们会有面包黄油，还有一壶茶…查尔斯过来坐在我身边。我听到他的叹息。他把帽子捏在手里，金黄的头发闪着光。他嘴唇红润。三个身穿白袍子的少年拿着铜蜡烛台，跑来跑去的，四处点灯引火。我望着他，心想他穿着白袍子，也混到他们中间，该多合适啊。

Say all of Mr Ibbs’s nephews had had their hearts turned against me? Say I met John Vroom before I reached Mrs Sucksby? His heart did not need turning; and he would know me, even behind my veil. I must be careful. I should have to study the house — make my move only when I knew how the land lay. It was hard, to be cautious and slow; but I thought of my mother, who had not been cautious enough. Look what happened to her.

要是艾伯斯先生的外甥们都调转枪头，一起来对付我，那可如何是好？要是在找到萨克丝贝太太之前，我先遇到约翰。瓦儒，那又如何是好？他可不必调转枪头；就算我戴着面纱，他也认出我。我一定要小心行事。我得先观察一下那幢房子——得看清楚了苗头，再动手。时时警惕，放慢脚步，可真难捱，不过我想起了我母亲，她就是不够小心。瞧她碰到的都是什么事儿。

Then I looked at his coat. It was a good one, though rather marked by dust.

这时，我看到了他的外套。这是一件好衣服，虽然很沾了些尘土。

“How much money have we now, Charles?” I said.

“现在我们还有多少钱？查尔斯？”我说道。

He cried as he handed it over.

他把衣服交给当铺的时候，哭了起来。

I said we would get the coat back in a day or two. I bought him some shrimps and a piece of bread-and-butter, and a cup of tea.

我说我们一两天之内就能赎回那件衣裳。我给他买了点虾，一片面包，和一杯茶。

We had a penny and a half. I took him to a pawn-shop on Watling Street, and we pledged his coat for two shillings.

我们还有一个半分尼。我带他进了沃特林街的一间当铺，把他的外套当了，当了两先令。

“London shrimps,” I said. “Yum, ain’t they lovely?”

“伦敦的虾，”我说道。“好吃，不觉得吗？”

He did not answer. When we walked on, he walked a step behind me with his arms about himself, his eyes on the ground. His eyes were red — from tears, and also from grit.

他没回答。我们继续走，他跟在我身后一步之遥，抱着胳膊，眼睛望着地面。他两眼通红——因为流了太多眼泪，也因为揉得太多。

“Oh how,” he said, “shall I ever see Mr Rivers now? He’ll never want a boy in shirt-sleeves!”

“噢，我，”他说道，“现在怎么才能再见瑞富斯先生一面？他才不想要只穿着衬衣的人呢！”

We crossed the river at Blackfriars, and from there, though I had been going so carefully, I went more carefully still. We kept away from the back lanes and alleys, and stuck to the open roads; and the twilight — which is a false light, and always a good light for doing any kind of shady business in, better even than darkness — helped to hide us. Every step we took, however, was taking me closer to home: I began to see certain familiar things — even, certain familiar people — and felt, again, a stir in my head and heart, that I thought would quite undo me.

我们走黑修士桥（Blackfriars）过了河，虽然我已非常谨慎，不过从那儿开始，我一路更加留意了。我们避开小街小巷，一直沿着大路走；黄昏时分——日光微弱，干见不得人的勾当，适得其时，甚至比黑夜（darkness）还合适——正有助于隐藏我们的行踪。然而，我们每跨出一步，都离我家更近一步：我开始看到某些熟悉的事物——甚至于，某些熟悉的人——我头脑和心胸再次激荡一番，我本以为我会无动于衷。

“Not safe,” I said again, “while Dr Christie’s men are still behind us.”

“不安全，”我又说一遍。“现在克里斯蒂医生的人还跟在我们后边。”

When I spoke, my voice was thick. I said, “See that black door, Charles, with the window in it? That’s the door to my own house. The lady lives there, that’s been like my mother. I should like more than anything now, to run to that door; but I shan’t. It ain’t safe.”

开口说话的时候，我的声音沙哑了。我说道。“看到那个黑的门了吗？查尔斯？上面带个窗户的？那就是我家的门。那位女士就住在那儿，一直待我象我妈妈一样。现在我真想不顾一切跑过去，可是我不能。这不安全。”

Then we reached Gravel Lane and the Southwark Bridge Road, turned up to the west end of Lant Street and stood looking along it; and my blood rushed so fast and my heart rose so high, I thought I should swoon. I gripped the brick wall we rested against and let my head drop, until the blood went slower.

这时，我们已经走到格里弗街（Gravel Lane）和南沃克桥路（Southwark Bridge Road），到了蓝特街的西头，站在那儿，沿街看过去。我的血液奔腾起来，我的心也提到嗓子眼里儿了。我们背着砖墙休息，我抠着那墙，强自低下头，直到我的热血冷却下来。

“Not safe?” he said. He gazed about him, fearfully. I suppose those streets — that looked so dear to my eyes I could have lain down and kissed them — might have looked rather low to his.

“不安全？”他说道。他恐惧地看看周围。我觉得这些街道——在我眼中如此熟悉如此可爱，我简直要趴下去亲吻它们——可能在他眼里，太过低档了。

But I looked along the street, at Mr Ibbs’s door, and then at the window above it. It was the window to the room I shared with Mrs Sucksby, and the temptation to go closer to it was too great. I caught hold of Charles and pushed him before me, and we walked, then stood at a wall where there was a bit of shadow between two bulging bow-windows.

不过我顺着蓝特街望过去，看到艾伯斯先生的门，然后又看到门上的窗户。那是我跟萨克丝贝太太一起住的房间窗户。我抓住查尔斯，把他推到我前面，我们走了几步，然后站到一面墙壁边上，那儿有两扇凸出来的窗户，凸窗之间有一点阴影，我们便站在阴影之中。

Some kids went by, and laughed at my veil. I knew their mothers, they were neighbours of ours; and I began to be afraid again, of being seen, and recognised. I thought I was a fool, after all, to have come so far down the street; then I thought, “Why don’t I just make a run at the door, calling out for Mrs Sucksby?” Maybe I’d have done it. I can’t say. For I had turned, as if to rearrange my bonnet; and while I was still making up my mind Charles put his hand to his mouth, and cried out, “Oh!”

几个小孩子走过去，见了我的面纱，都哈哈大笑。我认识他们的妈妈，他们是我们的邻居。我又开始害怕被人看到，再把我认出来。我觉得其实我是个傻瓜，在这条街上走了这么远；随后我又想，“为什么我不跑到那个门口，把萨克丝贝太太喊出来？”也许我真该这么干。我也说不清。因为我转过身去，假装整理帽子；就在我痛下决心的当口儿，查尔斯手捂住自己的嘴，叫出声儿了，“噢！”

The kids that had laughed at my veil had run far down the street, and then had parted, to let someone walk between them.

那几个笑话我面纱的小孩沿着蓝特街跑远了，然后一群人分散开，让某人从他们中间走过。

It was Gentleman. He was wearing that old slouch hat, and had a scarlet cloth at his throat. His hair and whiskers were longer than ever. We watched him saunter. I think he was whistling. Then, at Mr Ibbs’s shop-door, he came to a stop. He put his hand to the pocket of his coat and drew out a key. He kicked his feet against the step — first the right, then the left — to knock the dust from them; then he fitted the key in the lock, glanced idly about, and went inside. He did it all, in the easiest and most familiar way you can imagine.

那人便是绅士。他戴着那顶旧的宽边软帽，用一块深红色的布围在喉咙处。头发和胡须都比先前长。我们盯着他悠闲地漫步而来。我想他还吹着口哨呢。这时候，走到艾伯斯先生的店门口，他停住脚步，手伸进外套口袋，拿出一把钥匙。他在台阶上磕了磕脚——先右后左——磕掉脚上的尘土。然后将钥匙插进锁里，随意地看一眼四周，便进了门。他以一种你想象中最轻松最熟悉的方式，开了门进了屋。

I saw him, and quivered right through. But my feelings were queer. “The devil!” I said. I should like to have killed him, to have shot him, to have run at him and struck his face. But the sight of him had also made me afraid, more afraid than I ought to have been — as afraid as if I were still at Dr Christie’s and might at any moment be taken, shaken, bound and plunged in water. My breath came strangely, in little catches.

见了他，我浑身便不住哆嗦。可是我的感觉很奇妙。“恶魔！”我说道。我本该杀了他，毙了他，跑上去甩他几个大耳光。可是，真看到他了，这又让我恐惧起来——比我预想的更甚——就好象我还在克里斯蒂医生的医院里，随时会被揪住，被摇晃，被捆绑，被泡在水里一样害怕。我的呼吸变得奇怪，有些哽咽了。

I don’t think Charles noticed. He was thinking of his shirt-sleeves. — “Oh!” he still said. “Oh! Oh!” He was looking at his fingernails, and at the smudges of dirt on his cuffs. I caught hold of his arm. I wanted to run — back, the way we had come. I wanted to run, more than anything. I almost did.

我不觉得查尔斯注意到了。他在想他的衬衣。——“噢！”他还在说。“噢！噢！”他望着自己的指甲缝，和袖口的污迹。我抓住他的胳膊。我想跑——跑回去，沿着我们来的路。我一门心思只想跑，其他什么也不想。我差点就要拔腿狂奔了。

“Come on,” I said. “Come, quick.” Then I looked again at Mr Ibbs’s door — thought of Mrs Sucksby behind it — thought of Gentleman, cool and easy at her side. Damn him, for making me afraid of my own home!

“快走，”我说道。“来吧，快点。”这时，我又望一眼艾伯斯先生的店门——想到萨克丝贝太太就在门里面——想到绅士，冷酷又轻松地站在她身边。该死的，竟让我对自己家也产生了畏惧之心！

“I won’t be chased away!” I said. “We’ll stay, but we’ll hide. Come, here.” And I gripped Charles tighter and began to push him, not away from Lant Street, but further along it. There were rooming-houses, all along that side. We reached one, now. “Got beds?” I said, to the girl at the door.

“我才不会被他吓跑！”我说道。“我们要留下，不过我们要藏起来。来，这边。”我抓着查尔斯，手上更用力了，还开始推他，并不是朝着离开蓝特街的方向，而是朝蓝特街深处走。沿着街这边有些公寓。这时我们来到一幢公寓门口。“有床位吗？”我对门口的一个姑娘说道。

“Got a room?” I said quickly.

“有房间吗？”我飞快地说道。

“Might have,” she answered, trying to see beyond my veil.

“可能有吧，”她答道，想看清楚面纱后的我。

“That one costs more.”

“那间要贵一点儿。”

“We’ll have it for the week. I’ll give you a shilling now, and pay you the rest tomorrow.” She made a face; but she wanted gin, I knew it. “All right,” she said. She got to her feet, put the baby on the step, and took us up a slippery staircase.

“我们要住一个星期。现在我先给你一先令，明天给你剩下的钱。”她撇撇嘴巴；不过我知道，那是她想喝酒了。“好吧，”她说道。她弯下腰，将孩子放在台阶上，领我们上了一段特别容易滑了脚的楼梯。

“Got half a one,” she said. Half was not enough. We went to the next house, and then the next. They were both full. At last we reached the house right across from Mr Ibbs’s. There was a woman on the step with a baby. I did not know her. That was good.

“有半个，”她说道。半个可不够。我们来到隔壁，然后又是隔壁。那两家都客满。最后，我们来到跟艾伯斯先生的店正对门的那户人家。门口台阶上有个女人，手里抱着孩子。我不认识她，倒也正好。

“At the front?” I looked up and pointed. “That one?”

“就前面？”我望过去，抬手一指。“那间？”

The room was small and dark, with two low beds and a chair. The window had shutters closed before it, on the street-side, and there was a stick with a hook hung next to the glass, meant for opening them.

房间又小又昏暗，房中有两张矮床和一把椅子。朝街面的窗户都关上了，窗玻璃旁边挂着一根带钩儿的棍子，是用来开窗户的。

There was a man dead drunk on the landing. The door to the room she led us into had no lock to it, only a stone for propping it shut.

楼梯平台上有个男人，烂醉如泥了。她领我们进了一个房间，房门上没有锁，只有一块石头撑着才好关门。

“You do it like this,” said the woman, beginning to show us. I stopped her. I said I had a weakness of the eye and didn’t care for sunlight.

“你这样开窗户，”那女人说道，说着边要教我们。我拦住她。我说我眼睛有点小毛病，不喜欢太阳光。

“I don’t believe you. You told a lie to that lady, about having a poor eye. You took that gown and those shoes, and that pie. That pie made me sick. You have brought me to a horrible house.”

“我不相信你。你跟那位女士说了个谎，说什么眼睛不好。你拿了那些衣裳、鞋子，还有馅饼。那块馅饼让我恶心。你还带我到了这么可怕的房子里。”

“Sit down,” I said. I put my face back to the window.

“坐下，”我说道。我又凑到窗户上。

“I want my jacket,” he said.

“我想要我的夹克，”他说道。

For I had seen straight away that the shutters had little holes cut in them, that were more or less perfect for what I wanted; and when the woman had got our shilling off us and gone, I shut the door behind her, took off my veil and bonnet, then put myself at the glass and looked out.

因为我已经一目了然地看到，那窗户上有些小孔，基本上正合我心意；等那个女人拿了我们的钱，走了之后，我关上房门，摘下面纱和帽子，再凑到窗玻璃上，望到外面。

“You can’t have it. The shop is closed. We shall get it tomorrow.”

“你拿不到夹克。当铺关门了。我们明天去拿。”

“I have brought you to London. Ain’t that what you wanted?”

“我把你带到伦敦来。这不正是你想要的吗？”

“You haven’t seen the best parts yet. Go to sleep. We’ll get your jacket back in the morning. You shall feel like a new man then.”

“你还没看有到最好看的部分呢。去睡一觉。明早我们就把你的夹克拿回来。到时候你就会觉得自己焕然一新了。”

“I thought London would be different.”

“我以为伦敦会不一样。”

There was nothing to see, however. Mr Ibbs’s shop door was still shut, and Mrs Sucksby’s window dark. I watched for quite a minute before I remembered Charles. He was standing, gazing at me, squeezing his cap between his hands. In some other room a man gave a shout, and he jumped.

可是，外面没什么可看的。艾伯斯先生的店门还紧紧关闭着，萨克丝贝太太的房间窗户黑洞洞的。我观察了好一会儿，才想起查尔斯在旁边。他站在那儿，盯着我，两手捏着帽子。别的房间里有个男人大嚷一声，他吓得跳起来。

“Weren’t they,” I answered, my eye at the shutter still. “I’d say he needs a boy to trim them.”

“怎么不长，”我眼睛还在窗户上。“要我说啊，他需要一个小鬼来帮他修饰胡子。”

“Weren’t Mr Rivers’s whiskers long, though?” he said.

“不过，瑞富斯先生的胡子不嫌长吗？”

“Don’t he just!” He sighed then, and lay back upon the bed, putting his cap over his eyes; and I kept watch at the glass. I kept watch, like cats keep watch at mouse-holes — not minding the hours as they passed, not thinking of anything but what I gazed at. The night grew dark, and the street — that was a busy street, in summer grew empty and still, the kids all gone to their beds, the men and women come back from the public houses, the dogs asleep.

“可不就是！”他于是叹息连连，面朝天躺在床上，帽子盖住眼睛；而我则一直贴在玻璃上观望。我一直盯着，就好象猫儿盯着老鼠洞——时间在流逝，也不管不顾，除了我眼里的事物，其他什么都不想。夜深了，街上——夏季里，那条街挺繁忙的——变得既空荡又安静，孩子们都上床了，男男女女从酒馆里出来，各回各家。各家的狗也睡着了。

“This bed’ve got black hairs in it.”

“这张床上有黑毛儿。”

I heard him sit and rub his face. I thought he might be about to cry again. But then, after a minute he spoke, and his voice had changed.

我听到他坐下来，搓着脸。我以为他可能又要哭了。不过后来，停了一分钟，他开口了，声音全变了。

“Red hairs won’t hurt you.”

“红毛儿又伤不了你。”

“How shall we get it? You just gave our shilling to that lady.”

“我们怎么把夹克拿回来呢？你把我们的钱都给那位女士了。”

“You mustn’t ask. Go to sleep. Ain’t you tired?”

“你不必问了。去睡一觉。你不累吗？”

“Then take the other.”

“那就睡那张床。”

“How?”

“怎么搞？”

“I shall get us another shilling tomorrow.”

“明天我会再搞到一先令。”

“That one has red hairs.”

“那张床上有红毛儿。”

A girl. A girl, very slim at the waist… I saw her, and began to shake. She came on, while Mrs Sucksby moved about the room behind her, taking off her brooches and rings. She came right to the glass. She lifted her arm to rest it upon the bar of the window-sash, and then she stood with her brow upon her wrist, and grew still. Only her fingers moved, as they plucked idly at the lace across the window. Her hand was bare. Her hair was curled. I thought, It can’t be her. Then Mrs Sucksby spoke again, the girl lifted her face, the light of the streetlamp fell full upon it; and I cried out loud.

一个姑娘。一个姑娘，腰肢非常纤细…我一见她，便开始颤抖。她继续走着，萨克丝贝太太围着她满屋子转，取下她的胸针和指环。她径直走到窗前。她抬起胳膊，将胳膊放在窗格的横栏上，然后站在那儿，额头靠着手腕，人不动了。只有手指头还在动，她手指头无目的地戳着窗户上的布条儿。她手上没戴手套，头发也是卷的。我心想，那才不会是她。这时，萨克丝贝太太又在说话，那姑娘抬起脸来，街灯的光照过来，将她的脸照个正着；于是我大叫一声。

In the other rooms in the house, people walked, pulled chairs across the floor; a baby cried. A girl — she was drunk, I suppose — laughed, on and on. Still I watched. Some clock struck off the hours. I could not hear bells without wincing, now, and felt every one of them: at last came the twelve, and then the half, and I was listening out for the threequarters — still watching, still waiting; but beginning to wonder, perhaps, what it was I thought I would see — when this happened: There came a light and a shadow, in Mrs Sucksby’s room; and then a figure — Mrs Sucksby herself! My heart nearly flew into bits. Her hair showed white, and she had her old black taffeta gown on. She stood with a lamp in her hand, her face turned from me, her jaw moving — she was talking to someone else farther back in the room, someone who now came forward, as she moved back.

这幢房子里的其他房间里，人们走来走去，还拖着椅子走；有个婴儿在哇哇大哭。有个姑娘——她喝醉了，我觉得——笑个不停。我仍在观望。有钟声敲响，报送钟点。这会儿听到钟声，我没法儿不心惊肉跳，我清清楚楚地听到每一下钟声：最后到十二点了，接下来是十二点半，我就听着外面的动静，听了三刻钟——一直在观望，一直在守侯。不过或许，我也开始怀疑，原以为能看到些什么事情，可能看不到了。正在这时候，我看到：萨克丝贝太太的房间里出现了一点灯光和一个影子；然后是一个人影——就是萨克丝贝太太本人！我真是肝肠寸断啊！她头发好象都白了，身上穿着那件旧的黑塔夫绸衣裳。她站在那儿，手里提着灯，脸转过去，下巴在动——她在跟房间里的人讲话，有人在她身后，当她朝房中走去时，那人却走上前来。

I moved back from the window. My own white face was reflected there, the streetlight striking it — on the cheek, beneath my eye — in the shape of a heart. I turned from the glass. My cry had woken Charles, and I suppose my look was peculiar.

我从窗前退开去。我苍白的脸印在窗玻璃上，街灯灯光投射其上——正照见眼睛下面的两颊——照出个心形。我转过身，我的哭声将查尔斯惊醒，我觉得我的样子十分古怪。

She might have heard me — though I don’t think she can have — for she turned her head and seemed to look at me, to hold my gaze across the dusty street and the darkness, for quite a minute. I don’t think I blinked, in all that time. I don’t think she did, her eyes stayed open — I saw them, and remembered their colour at last.

她也许是听到我的叫声——虽然我不认为她听得到——因为她扭过头来，似乎望着我，似乎穿过了肮脏的街道和夜色，看到了我的眼睛，看了足有一分钟。这整个过程里，我不觉得自己眨过眼睛。我也不觉得她眨了眼，她的眼睛定定地张着——我见了那双眼睛，便终于想起它的颜色。

I put my hand before my mouth. “Oh, Charles!” I said.

我手捂着嘴巴。“噢，查尔斯！”我说道。

Then she turned back into the room, took a step away, caught up the lamp; and as she lowered the flame Mrs Sucksby went close to her, lifted her hands, and begin to unfasten the hooks at the back of her collar. Then came darkness.

这时，她转过身朝房中走了一步，拿起灯；当她将灯光调暗后，萨克丝贝太太便走到她身边，帮她抬起双手，开始帮她解胸衣背后的挂钩。然后是一片漆黑。

“Miss, what is it?” he said in a whisper.

“小姐，怎么了？”他低声说道。

I took a couple of staggering steps towards him. “Charles, look at me! Tell me who I am!”

我踉跄着朝他走了一两步。“查尔斯，看着我！告诉我我是谁！”

“Not miss, don’t call me miss! I never was a miss, though they made me out one. — Oh! She has taken everything from me, Charles. She has taken everything and made it hers, in spite. She has made Mrs Sucksby love her, as she made — Oh! I’ll kill her, tonight!”

“不是小姐，别叫我小姐，我可从来都不是什么小姐，虽然他们骗我做小姐。——噢！她把我的一切都夺走了，查尔斯。她夺走了一切，又心术不正，把一切都据为己有！她骗取了萨克丝贝太太的爱，因为她骗取了——噢！我要杀了她，就今晚！”

“Who, miss?”

“谁，小姐？”

I ran in a kind of fever, back to the shutter, to look at the face of the house. I said, “Now, might I climb to the window? I could force the bolt, creep in, and stab her as she lies sleeping. Where is that knife?”

于某种狂热之中，我跑回窗边，望着那幢房子的正面。我说道，“好，我能跳到那边窗户上吗？我能撬开插销，再爬进去，再趁她躺着睡觉，给她一刀。那把刀呢？”

He watched me in terror; then came and, with trembling fingers, showed me how, I ground the blade.

他满脸惊恐地望着我；然后走过来，用颤抖的双手教我如何磨刀。我磨着刀。

I ran again, and caught it up and tried its edge. “Not sharp enough,” I said. I looked about me, then picked up the stone that was used as a door-stop, and drew the blade across it.

我又奔过去，把刀翻出来，摸了摸刀刃。“不够锋利，”我说道。我看看身边，捡起那块挡门的石头，将刀刃放在石头上，拉了一下。

“Like this?” I said to Charles. “Or like this? Which makes the best edge? Come on, come on. You’re the bloody knife-boy, aren’t you?”

“象这样？”我对查尔斯说道。“还是象这样？怎么能把刀刃磨利了？来吧，来吧。你是最会磨刀的小伙子了，不是吗？”

“That’s good,” I said. “That will feel good, with its point against her breast.” Then I stopped. “But, don’t you think that, after all, a death by stabbing comes rather quick? Had I not ought to find a slower way?” — I thought of stifling, strangling, beating with a club. — “Have we a club, Charles? That will take longer; and oh! I should like to have her know me, as she dies. You shall come with me, Charles. You shall help. — What’s the matter?”

“这样才好，”我说道。“刀尖插进她的胸膛，这样感觉才好嘛。”这时我停住了。“不过，你难道不觉得，其实，给人一刀扎死，死得是不是太快了？我是不是应该想个慢一点的法子？”——我想到闷死，用绳子勒，用棍子打。——“我们有棍子吗？查尔斯？用棍子能把时间拖长一点儿；噢！她死的时候，我应该让她认出我。你得跟我一起去，查尔斯。你得搭把手。——怎么了？”

“I want Mr Rivers!”

“我只想找瑞富斯先生！”

I said, “Look at you. You ain’t the boy. That boy had nerve.”

我说道，“看着我。你也不是那个孩子。那个孩子有血性。”

He said, “You ain’t — You ain’t the lady you seemed to be at Briar!”

他说道，“你不是——你不是在布莱尔时的那个女士！”

I laughed, a mad laugh. “I’ve got news for you. Mr Rivers ain’t quite the gent you thought him, either. Mr Rivers is a devil and a rogue.”

我哈哈大笑，那是一阵疯狂的笑。“我有个消息要告诉你。瑞富斯先生也的确不是你原先认为的那种绅士。瑞富斯先生是个恶魔，他是个流氓。”

“If he signed it, it must have been true!”

“要真是他签的，那当时肯定也就是那么回事儿！”

“Better that, than — Oh!” He sat upon the floor and hid his face. “Oh! Oh! I was never more miserable, in all of my life. I hate you!”

“不止是男仆，不止——噢！”他跌坐在地板上，脸埋起来。“噢！噢！我这辈子，再也不会这么伤心了。我讨厌你！”

“You want to man for a devil?”

“你想成为恶魔的男仆？”

“And I hate you,” I said, “you fucking nancy.” I still had the stone in my hand. I threw it at him.

“我也讨厌你。”我说道，“你他妈的娘娘腔。”我手里还抓着那块石头，我将石头扔过去。

“They never knew him like I did. He’s bad, he’s rotten.”

“他们都不象我这么了解他。他是坏人，他坏透了。”

“He’s a villain.”

“他是个恶棍。”

“He’s a gem of a man! Everyone at Briar said so.”

“他是男仆的珍宝（gem）！在布莱尔每个人都这么说。”

He made his hands into fists. “I don’t care!” he cried.

他两手握成拳头。“我不在乎！”他叫道。

He stepped forward. “He ain’t!”

他上前一步。“他不是！”

“He is, though. He ran off with Miss Maud, told everyone I was her and put me in a madhouse. Who else do you think it was, signed my order?”

“可他是的。他带着莫德小姐跑了，告诉别人我是莫德小姐，还把我关进了疯人院。你觉得还会有谁，去签署关押我的文件？”

He had walked to the wall and stood with his back against it, and begun to quiver.

他人已经走到墙边，站在那儿，背靠着墙壁，开始打寒战。

It missed him by about a foot; but the sound of it striking the wall and floor was awful. I was shaking, now, almost as badly as he was. I looked at the knife I held, then put it from me. I touched my face. My cheek and brow were wet with a horrible sweat. I went to Charles and knelt beside him. He tried to push me away.

石头擦着边儿飞过，没砸中他；不过击中墙壁和地板的声音却十分可怕。现在我也浑身发抖，抖得快跟他一样厉害了。我看看手里的刀，然后将刀放在一旁。我摸摸自己的脸。我的脸颊和额头都大汗淋漓，湿漉漉的。我走过去，跪在他身边。他想把我推开。

“Get off me!” he cried. “Or, kill me now! I don’t care!”

“放开我！”他叫道。“要么现在就杀了我！我不在乎！”

“Charles, listen to me,” I said, in a steadier voice. “I don’t hate you, truly. And you mustn’t hate me. I am all you’ve got. You have lost your place at Briar, and your aunty don’t want you. You can’t go back to the country now. Besides, you should never find your way out of Southwark, without my help. You should wander and grow bewildered; and London is full of cruel hard men who do unspeakable things to bewildered fair-haired boys. You might be taken by the master of a ship, and finish up in Jamaica. How should you like that? Don’t cry, for God’s sake!” — He had begun to sob. — “You think I shouldn’t like to cry? I have been dreadfully cheated, and the person that cheated me worst is lying at this moment in my own bed, with my own mother’s arms about her. This is a greater thing than you can understand. This is a matter of life and death. I was foolish to say I would kill her tonight. But give me a day or two more, and let me think. There’s money over there and — I swear it, Charles! — there are people there too who, once they know how I’ve been wronged, will give any kind of sum to the boy that has helped me back to them…”

“查尔斯，听我说。”我用稍平稳些的声音说道。“我并不是真的讨厌你。你也不必讨厌我。我是你的一切了。你在布莱尔的差事已经丢了，你婶婶也不想见你了。现在你没办法再回乡下。另外，没有我帮你，你永远也找不到出南沃克的路。你会流落街头，变得痴痴傻傻的；伦敦城里都处都是那种铁石心肠的残忍的人，他们会金头发的男孩子干一些难以启齿的事。你会被某个船东抓起来，然后死在牙买加。你怎么会喜欢这种事呢？别哭了，看在上帝的份上！”—他开始抽噎。—“你以为我不想哭？我被人骗惨了，骗我骗得最狠的那个人，这会儿正躺在我的床上，我自己的母亲还抱着她。这远不是你能够明白的事情。这事关生死。我就是太蠢了，才会说出今晚要杀了她的话。不过再给我一两天的时间，容我好好想一想。钱就在那边——我发誓钱在那边儿，查尔斯！——我家人也在那边，他们一旦知道我如何叫人陷害了，就会倾其所有，搭救我，让我回到家中…”

He shook his head, still crying; and now, at last, I began to cry, too. I put my arm about him and he leaned into my shoulder, and we shuddered and wailed until, finally, someone in the room next door began to bang on the wall and call out for us to stop.

他摇摇头，还是哭；而此时，终于，我也开始哭了。我抱着他，他靠在我肩膀上，我俩抱头痛哭，一直哭到后来，隔壁有人开始邦邦邦地敲墙壁，嚷嚷着叫我们不要哭了。

“There, now,” I said, wiping my nose. “You’re not afraid, now? You’ll sleep, like a good boy?”

“行了，好了，”我擦擦鼻子说道。“现在你不害怕了吧？你会象好孩子一样去睡觉吗？”

But I kept wakeful, all through that night. I thought of Maud, across the street, lying breathing in Mrs Sucksby’s arms, her mouth open like his, like a flower, her throat perfectly slender, and perfectly white and bare.

可我一直醒着，一整夜都醒着。我想到莫德，就在街那边，躺在萨克丝贝太太怀里，嘴唇也像他这样张着，像朵花儿似的，她的脖颈纤细优雅，光洁无比。

He said he thought he would, if I would keep beside him; and so we lay together on the bed with the red hairs in it, and he slept, with his pink lips parted, and his breaths coming even and smooth.

他说他想他会的，只要我一直在他身边；于是我们一起躺在那张有红毛儿的床上，他睡着了，粉嫩的嘴唇张着，呼吸变的均匀平稳。

By the time the morning came, I had the beginnings of a plan worked out. I stood at the window and watched Mr Ibbs’s door for a time but then, seeing noone stirring, gave it up. That could wait. What I needed now was money. I knew how to get it. I made Charles brush his hair and put a parting in it, then took him quietly from the house, by the back way. I took him to Whitechapel — a place, I thought, far enough from the Borough for me to risk going about without my veil. I found a spot on the High Street.

清晨来临之际，我已经开始行动了。我站在窗边，望着艾伯斯先生的店门，看了一会儿，不过后来看到无人上门，便放弃了。现在我需要的是钱。我知道怎么搞到钱。我让查尔斯梳梳头，帮他把头发分好，然后悄悄地把他带出那幢房子，从后门走。我带他去白教堂——这个地方，我觉得，离镇子可够远的，远到可以让我冒个风险，不戴面纱地跑来跑去。我在高街找了个地方（High Street）。“站在这儿，”我说道。他照办了。

“Let’s what?”

“干什么？”

“Stand here,” I said. He did. “Now, remember how you cried so hard last night? Let’s see you do it again.”

“好了，还记得你昨晚哭的多伤心吗？再让我们看一看你是怎么哭的。”

I caught hold of his arm and pinched it. He gave a squeal, then began to snivel. I put my hand on his shoulder and looked up and down the street, in an anxious way. A few people gazed curiously at us. I beckoned them over.

我抓住他的胳膊，掐了一把。他尖叫一声，然后开始呜呜地哭。我手放在他肩膀上，东张西望地看着这条街，万分焦急的样子。有几个人好奇地望着我们。我把他们都招到跟前来。

Of course, the idea of a gentleman giving him money made Charles cry worse than ever. His tears were like so many magnets. We made three shillings, that first day — which paid for our room; and when we tried the same dodge the day after, on a different street, we made four.

当然了，一个绅士要给他钱的想法，让查尔斯哭的更凶了。他的眼泪好似有某种磁力。我们搞了三个先令，第一天——可以付房钱了；等第二天我们在另一条街道上，如法炮制同一套把戏后，我们要到四个先令。

“Please, sir, please, lady,” I said. “I just come upon this poor boy, he’s come in from the country this morning and has lost his master. Can you spare a couple of farthings, set him back upon his way? Can you? He’s all alone and don’t know no-one, don’t know Chancery Lane from Woolwich. He has left his coat in his master’s cart. — God bless you, sir! Don’t cry, mate! Look, this gentleman is giving you twopence. Here comes some more! And they say Londoners’ hearts is hard, in the country — don’t they…?”

“求求你，先生，求求你，女士，”我说道。“我刚碰到这个可怜的孩子，他早上从乡下进到城里来，跟主人走散了。你们能不能施舍他一个便士半个便士，打发他上路回家？可以吗？他孤身一个人，谁也不认识，也不知道乌尔韦奇镇（Woolwich）的法院路（Chancery Lane）。外套也落在他主人的马车上了。——上帝保佑你，先生！别哭了！伙计！看吧，这位绅士要给你两便士呢。这边给的更多！他们都说伦敦人心肠硬着呢，在乡下就——不是这么说的吗…？”

The sight of his hands, of his honest face, made me want to weep. I’d think, “Why can’t I go to him?” Then, a little later, I’d see Gentleman, and be filled again with fear. Then I’d see Maud. I’d see her at the window. She liked to stand there, with her face against the sash — as if she knew I was watching, and mocked me! I saw Dainty, helping her dress in the mornings, fastening up her hair. And I saw Mrs Sucksby, at night, letting it down.

看到他的双手，看到他诚实的面孔，这着实令我想哭。我心里会想，“为什么我不能过去找他？”然后，再过一会儿，我就看到绅士，便再一次充满恐惧。然后，我就看到莫德。我看到她站在窗前。她喜欢站在那而，脸贴着窗格——她仿佛知道我在观察似的，好象还在嘲笑我！

That got us our suppers. The money that was left over after that I kept, along with the ticket to Charles’s coat, in my shoe. I wore my shoes, even in bed.

这就够我们吃晚饭了。剩下的钱我收着，跟查尔斯衣服的当票收在一道，藏在我的鞋子里。上了床我也还是穿着鞋子。

“I want my jacket,” Charles would say, a hundred times an hour; and every time I’d answer, “Tomorrow. I swear. I promise. Just one more day…”

“我想要我的夹克，”查尔斯一个钟头里要念叨上百次；每次我都回答他，“明天。我发誓。我保证。就再多等一天…”

And then, all day, I would stand at the shutters, my eye at the heart-shaped hole. I was watching the house, figuring out its habits. I was marking it, patient as a cracksman. I saw thieves come, bringing pieces of poke to Mr Ibbs: I saw him turn the lock on his door, pull down his blind.

然后，所有的日子里，我都会站在窗前，眼睛贴着心形的孔，我在观察那幢房子，总结其中规律。我像盗贼一样地耐心，注意着它。我看到一个个小偷上门，给艾伯斯先生捎来一个个袋子：我看到他锁上门，放下窗帘。

“They have got them all in their power,” I’d say. “Dainty, and Mr Ibbs, and Mrs Sucksby; and I dare say John and even Phil. Like two great spiders, they have spun their web. We’ve got to be careful, Charles. Oh, haven’t we! For say they know, through Dr Christie, that I’ve escaped? They must know by now! They are waiting, Charles. They are waiting for me. She never leaves the house — that’s clever! — for, in keeping there, she keeps near Mrs Sucksby. He goes, however. I’ve seen him. I’ve been waiting, too. They don’t know that. He goes. We’ll make our move, next time he does. I’m the fly they want. They shan’t get me. We’ll send them you. They won’t have thought of that! Hey, Charles?”

“他们已经把他们都掌握住了，”我会说道。“达蒂，艾伯斯先生，还有萨克丝贝太太，我敢说约翰甚至还有菲尔。就像两只大蜘蛛一样，他们已经织好了网。我们已经防着了，查尔斯。噢，我们没有防着！因为，要是他们已经从克里斯蒂医生那儿知道了，我跑了，那可如何是好？现在他们肯定知道了！他们在等着呢，查尔斯。他们在等我上门。她从不出门——真聪明！——因为，一直待在那儿，她就好一直守着萨克丝贝太太了。可是他却走了。我已经见过他了。我也在等。他们可不知道我在等。他走了。下次他一周，我们就可以行动了，我就是他们想抓住的那只苍蝇。他们休想抓住我。我们要把你派过去。他们才想不到这招！嗨，查尔斯？”

Charles never answered. I had kept him so long in that dark room, doing nothing, his face had got pale, and his eyes had begun to grow glassy, like a doll’s. “I want my jacket,” he still said, now and then, in a feeble sort of bleat; but I think he had almost forgotten what it was he wanted it for. For at last there came a time when he said it, and I answered: “All right. Today you’ll get it. We’ve waited long enough. Today’s our day”; and instead of looking pleased, he stared and looked frightened.

查尔斯是不会回答的。我让他待在昏暗的屋子里，待得太久了，什么都不干，他的面孔已经变得苍白，双眼也开始变得呆滞无光，像布娃娃的眼睛。“我想要我的夹克，”他时不时地，用一种可怜巴巴的语气，有气无力地冒出这么一句来。可是我觉得，他早已把他想要回夹克的初衷忘得精光了。所以，终于有一次，他又说起这句话，我便答道：“好吧。今天你就能拿到夹克。我们等得时间已经得够长了。今天是我们的日子。”他并没有露出开心的样子，相反，他瞪着眼睛，一脸恐惧。

Once I saw her lift a tress of it to her mouth, and kiss it. With each new thing, I would press my face so hard against the glass I stood at, it would groan in its frame.

每看到一项新事物，我就会站在那儿，用力将脸贴在窗玻璃上，窗框都被我压得咯吱作响。

And at night, when the house was dark, I would take up my candle and walk, back and forth, back and forth, from one wall to another.

到了夜里，当那幢房子漆黑一片时，我会拿着蜡烛，在房间里走来走去，前前后后，从这面墙壁走到那面墙壁。

I found us places next to a woman holding a baby. I sat with the coat across my lap. Then I looked at the baby. The woman caught my eye, and I smiled.

我发现我们旁边有个抱小孩的女人。我将帽子放在腿上。然后望着那个孩子。那女人与我对视一眼，我露出微笑。

Perhaps he thought he saw a certain feverish something in my eye. I don’t know. It seemed to me I was thinking like a sharper, for the first time in my life. I took him back to Watling Street and got his jacket out of pawn. But I kept hold of it. Then I took him on a “bus. — “For a treat,” I said. “Look out the window, at the shops.”

也许是他认为他从我眼中看到了某种狂热的东西。我也不知道。似乎于我而言，我这辈子头一回，像骗子一样地盘算着心事。我把他带回到沃特林街，从当铺里将他的夹克赎回来。不过一直由我拿着。然后我带他坐上一辆巴士。——“我请客，”我说道。“看看窗户外面，那些店铺。”

“Pretty boy,” she said. “Isn’t he? Won’t sleep for his mother, though. I bring him on the “buses and the bumping sends him off. We’ve been from Fulham to Bow; now we’re on our way back.”

“漂亮孩子，”她说道。“不觉得吗？可就是不听他妈妈的话，不好好睡觉。我抱他坐巴士，车子颠一颠他就睡着了。我们从弗海姆坐到宝坞；现在我们要回去了。”

“He’s a peach,” I said. I leaned in and stroked his cheek. “Look at them lashes! He’ll break hearts, he will.”

“他可真是个小桃子，”我说道。我凑过去拍拍他的脸。“瞧瞧这眼睫毛！将来他会让别人心碎，肯定的。”

“Won’t he!”

“他才不会！”

Then I leaned back. When the next stop came, I made Charles get off. The woman said good-bye, and from the window, as the “bus moved away, she waved. But I didn’t wave back. For, under cover of Charles’s coat, I had had a feel about her waistband; and had prigged her watch. It was a nice little ladies’ watch, and just what I needed. I showed it to Charles. He looked at it as though it were a snake that might bite him.

于是我便坐直了身子。到了下一站的时候，我带着查尔斯下车。那女人说了句再见，车子走了，她还在窗户里招手。不过我没招手回应她。因为，在查尔斯外套的包裹之下，我已将她的腰带摸了个遍；还把她的表偷过来了。那是一块小巧的女士表，正是我所需要的。我拿给查尔斯看。他望着表，就好象那是一条蛇，会咬他一口。

He frowned, then wrote. It looked all right to me. I said, “Now you write this. Write: I was put in the madhouse by that villain your friend — so called! — Gentleman –“

他皱皱眉头，然后动笔写起来。在我看来一切都好。我说道，“现在你这样写。写：我被那个恶棍你的朋友——曾称之为！——绅士关进了疯人院里——”

“Where did you get that?” he said.

“你从哪儿搞来的？”他说道。

“Don’t you know?”

“你不知道吗？”

“In a minute.”

“等一分钟。”

We were walking on London Bridge. “Shut up,” I said, “or I’ll throw it over the side. — That’s better. Now, tell me this: can you write?”

我们正走在伦敦桥上。“闭嘴，”我说道，“不然我就把夹克扔到河里。——这还差不多。好了，告诉我：你会写字吗？”

“Someone gave it to me.”

“有个人给我的。”

“Write, Mrs Sucksby,” I said.

“写，萨克丝贝太太，”我说道。

He would not answer until I had gone to the wall of the bridge and dangled his jacket over; then he began to cry again, but said that he could. “Good boy,” I said. I made him walk a little further, until we found a man hawking papers and inks. I bought a plain white sheet, and a pencil; and I took Charles back to our room and had him sit and write out a letter. I stood with my hand on the back of his neck, and watched.

他不肯回答，直到我走到桥栏边，扬着他的衣服；这时他才哀号一声，说他会写字。“好孩子，”我说道。我带着他又走了一小段路，一直走到我们找到一个叫卖纸笔的人。我买了一张白纸，和一支铅笔；我把查尔斯带回住处，叫他坐下来写个字母。我站在一旁看着，手捏着他后脖梗子。

“Give me my coat!”

“我的夹克还给我。”

“I don’t believe you. Give me my jacket.”

“我不信。我的夹克给我”

He said, “How do you spell it?”

他说道，“你怎么拼这个名字？”

“You are going too fast,” he said, as he wrote. He tilted his head. ” By that villain your friend –“

“你说得太快了，”他边写边说。他歪着脑袋。“被那个恶棍你的朋友——”

“What word?”

“哪个词？”

“Before Miss Lilly.”

“李小姐前面的。”

The pencil moved on, then stopped. He blushed. “I won’t write that word,” he said.

铅笔移动着，这时就停住了。他满脸通红。“我是不会写那个词的，”他说道。

He did. I took the paper from him and wrote, at the bottom, my name.

他照办了。我从他手里拿起那张纸，在纸的最下面，写下我的名字。

“That’s good. Now this. Put: Mrs Sucksby, I have escaped and am close at hand. Send me a signal by this boy. He is a friend, he is writing this, his name is Charles. Trust him, and believe me — oh! if this fails, I’ll die! — believe me as ever as good and as faithful as your own daughter — There you must leave a space.”

“这就好。现在写这句。写：”萨克丝贝太太，我已经逃出来了，让这个小伙儿帮我捎个信儿。他是个朋友，就是他写的字条，他名叫查尔斯。请信任他，也相信我——噢！要是这也不成，那我就死了！——请相信我跟你的亲生女儿一样忠诚一样好——这里你必须空一行。

I pinched his neck. “You write it,” I said. “You hear me? Then you write this, nice and big: PIGEON MY ARSE! She is WORSE THAN HIM!”

我掐了一下他的脖子。“你给我写，”我说道。“你听到没有？然后你写这句，要写得又大又漂亮：狗屁小白鸽！她比他还坏！”

“– so called! — Gentleman; and that bitch Maud Lilly. — You must make those names stand out.”

“——曾称之为！——绅士；还有那个婊子李莫德。——你必须把这些名字写得醒目一点。”

“Don’t look at me!” I said, as I did it; then I kissed where I had written, and folded the paper up. “Here’s what you must do next,” I said then. Tonight, when Gentleman — Mr Rivers — leaves the house, you must go over, and knock, and ask to see Mr Ibbs. Say you’ve got a thing to sell him. You’ll know him straight off: he’s tall, and trims his whiskers. He’ll ask if you’ve been followed; and you must be sure, when he does, to say you got away clean. Then he’ll ask what brought you to him. Say you know Phil. If he asks how you know him you’re to say, “Through a pal named George.” If he asks which George you must say, “George Joslin, down Collier’s Rents.”

“不要看我！”写的时候，我说道；再亲一下我写过的地方，便将纸折好。然后我说道，“接下来你必须要做的事是，今天晚上，等绅士——瑞富斯先生——离开了那幢房子，你就走过去，敲门，找艾伯斯先生。就说你有个东西要卖给他。你一眼就能认出他：他是个高个子，他会问你有没有人跟着；他问了，你就必须很有把握地说甩掉了。然后他会问是谁让你来的。你就说你认识菲尔。要是他问你是怎么认识他的，你就说，”通过一个伙计，叫乔治的。“要是他问哪个乔治，你得说，”乔治。乔斯林，矿工区（Collier’s Rents）里边那个。

“What?”

“什么？”

“That B-word.”

“那个B字头的词。”

He hesitated; then bit his lip and wrote.

他犹豫一下；然后咬着嘴唇，继续写。

He swallowed. “George Joslin, down Collier’s Rents,” he said.

他吞了一下口水。“乔治。乔斯林，矿工区里边那个。”

“George Joslin, down — Oh, miss! I should rather anything than this!”

“乔治·乔斯林，矿工区——噢，小姐！我做什么都不能做这个！”

“George who, down where?”

“乔治什么，哪儿里面？”

“Should you rather the cruel hard men, the unspeakable things, Jamaica?”

“难道你更喜欢铁石心肠的残忍的人，还有那些难以启齿的事儿？牙买加？”

“Good boy. Next you hand him the watch. He will give you a price; but whatever price he gives you — if it be, a hundred pounds, or a thousand — you must say it ain’t enough. Say the watch is a good one, with Geneva works. Say — I don’t know — say your dad done watches, and you know them. Make him look a bit harder. Any luck, he’ll take the back off — that will give you the chance to look about. Here’s who you’re looking for: a lady, rather old, with hair of silver — she’ll be sitting in a rocking-chair, perhaps with a baby in her lap. That’s Mrs Sucksby, that brought me up. She’ll do anything for me. You find a way to reach her side, and pass this letter to her. You do it, Charles, and we’re saved. But listen here. If there’s a dark-faced, mean-looking boy about, keep clear of him, he’s against us. Same goes for a red-headed girl. And if that viper Miss Maud Lilly is anywhere near, you hide your face. Understand me? If she sees you — more even than the boy — then we are done for.”

“好孩子。接下来你把这块表给他。他会给你说个价钱；不过，无论他给你什么价钱——譬如说，一百镑或是一千镑——你都必须说这个价儿太低了。你说这是块好表，是日内瓦的做工。就说——我也不知道了——就说你老爹是做表的，你了解行情。稍微让他难受一点。再怎么着，他都会卸掉表的后盖——这就能给你观察周围的机会。你要找的是这个人：一位女士，很老了，银白色的头发——她会坐在一把摇椅上，说不定腿上还放着个孩子呢。那就是萨克丝贝太太，就是她把我抚养成人的。为了我，她什么事都肯干。你想办法走到她身边，把这个字条给她。你把字条给她了，查尔斯，我们就得救了。不过你仔细听好了。要是还有个板着面孔，一脸坏主意的男孩子在旁边，千万不要招他，他是跟我们作对的。有个红头发姑娘也一样。还有，要是那个忘恩负义的李莫德小姐也在旁边，你就把脸藏起来，不要给她看到。明白吗？要是给她看到——比那个男孩子还糟——那我们就完蛋了。”

“Put your coat on,” I said. “It’s time.”

“穿上你的外套，”我说道。“到时候了。”

He swallowed again. He put the note on the bed, and sat and looked fearfully at it. He practised his piece. I stood at the window, and watched, and waited. First came twilight, then came dark; and with the dark came Gentleman, slipping from Mr Ibbs’s door with his hat at an angle and that scarlet cloth at his throat. I saw him go; gave it another half-an-hour, to be sure; then looked at Charles.

他又吞了一下口水。他将字条放在床上，坐在那儿，神色恐惧地盯着字条。他在练习他的部分。我站在窗观察，静候时机。黄昏降临，然后是黑夜；在黑夜的掩护下，绅士出现了，他从艾伯斯先生的店门里闪身而出，歪戴着帽子，脖子上围着那块红布。我看着他离开；为以防万一，我又等了半个小时；然后我望着查尔斯。

He grew pale. I gave him his cap and his scarf, and turned up his collar.

他小脸儿变得煞白。我把他的帽子围巾塞给他，还帮他把领子竖起来。

He went, and after a moment I saw him cross the street and stand before Mr Ibbs’s. He walked like a man on his way to the rope.

他出去了，过了一小会儿，我看到他过马路，站到艾伯斯先生的店门口。他走路的样子，活象一个走向绞索的人。

“Have you got the letter? Very good. Be brave, now. No funny stuff. I’ll be watching, don’t forget.” He did not speak.

“那张字条你收好了吗？很好。勇敢点，好了。不能掉以轻心。我会一直盯着的，别忘了。”他没说话。

He pulled his scarf a little higher about his face, then he looked round, to where he knew I stood behind the shutter. — ” Don’t look round, you fool!” I thought, when he did that. Then he plucked at his scarf again; and then he knocked. I wondered if he might run from the step. He looked as though he would like to. But before he could, the door was opened, by Dainty.

他将围巾稍微扯高了一点，包住脸，然后回望一眼，正看到我藏身的那扇窗户。当他回头时，我心想，“不要回头看，你个傻冒！”这时，他又拉拉围巾；然后举手敲门。我正担心着，他是不是要从台阶上跑掉呢。他那副样子看起来似乎会跑掉。可就在他将跑而未跑之时，门开了，是达蒂开的门。

They spoke, and she left him waiting while she went in to Mr Ibbs; then she came back. She glanced up and down the street. Like a fool, he glanced with her, as if to see what she looked for. Then she nodded, and stepped back. He went in, and the door was closed. I imagined her turning the latch with her neat white hand. Then I waited.

他们说了几句话，她让他等在门口，自己进去找艾伯斯先生；然后她又回到门口，眼睛上上下下扫了一遍街道。他像个傻子一样，也随着她的目光东张西望，好象要看清楚她在找什么。然后她点点头，进屋了。他跟进去，门关上了。我想象着她那白皙洁净的手扭动锁纽。于是我就等着。

What did I suppose would happen? Perhaps, that the door would open, Mrs Sucksby come flying out, with Mr Ibbs behind her; perhaps only that she’d go to her room — show a light, make a sign — I don’t know.

我希望什么事发生呢？也许是，希望那个门开了，萨克丝贝太太从里面飞出来，艾伯斯先生跟在她后面；也许只是希望她进了自己的房间——点一盏灯，发个信号——我也不知道。

Say five minutes passed. Say ten.

也许过去了五分钟。也许是十分钟。

But the house stayed quiet, and when at last the door did open, there came only Charles again, with Dainty still behind him; and then again, the door was shut. Charles stood, and quivered. I was used by now to his quivers, and think I knew from the look of this one that things were bad. I saw him look up at our window and think about running. — ” Don’t you run, you fuckster!” I said, and hit the glass; and perhaps he heard it, for he put down his head and came back across the street and up the stairs. By the time he reached the room his face was crimson, and slick with tears and snot.

可那幢房子却始终静悄悄的，等那店门终于再次开启时，出来的又只是查尔斯，达蒂还在他身后；然后，门便关上了。查尔斯站在那儿，哆哆嗦嗦的。到这个时候，我才习惯看他哆嗦，心里想，从这他副样子看，我就知道坏事了。我看到他抬头望过来，看着我这扇窗户，想跑过来。——“别跑呀，你个狗娘养的！”我说道，手砸了一下窗玻璃；也许他听到了玻璃的声音，因为他低下头，穿过马路，回到这边来，上了楼。进房间的那一刻，他面色通红，脸上糊着眼泪和鼻涕。

“Made you what?” I said. “What happened? What happened, you little tick?”

“强迫你什么？”我说道。“怎么回事？怎么回事，你这个小把戏？”

I got hold of him and shook him. He put his hands before his face.

我一把抓住他，不住地摇晃。他双手挡住脸。

“God help me, I didn’t mean to do it!” he said, bursting in. “God help me, she found me out and made me!”

“上帝救救我吧，我本来不打算干这事的！”他冲进来说道，“上帝救救我，她把我认出来了，还强迫我！”

“Miss Maud! Miss Maud!”

“莫德小姐！莫德小姐！”

I looked at him in horror. “She saw me,” he said, “and she knew me. I did it all, just as you said. I gave the watch, and the tall man took it and opened its back. He thought my scarf was queer, and asked if I’d the toothache. I said I did. He showed me a pair of nippers, that he said were good for drawing teeth. I think he was teasing. The dark boy was there, burning paper. He called me a — a pigeon. The red-headed girl didn’t give me a look. But the lady, your ma, was sleeping; and I tried to reach her side, but Miss Maud saw the letter in my hand. Then she looked at me, and knew me. She said, “Come here, boy, you’ve hurt your hand,” and she got hold of me before the others could see. She had been playing cards at a table, and she held the letter under the table and read it, and she twisted my fingers so hard –“

我满心恐惧地望着他。“她看到我了，”他说道，“她认得我。我都照你说的办了。我把那块表给他们，那个高个子男人接过去，把后盖打开了。他觉得我戴围巾有点古怪，还问我是不是牙疼。我说我确实牙疼。他给我看了一对圆环，他说那玩意有助拔牙。我觉得他在说笑话。那个板着脸的男孩子在家，在烧纸，他叫我——叫我小白鸽。红头发的姑娘看也没看我一眼。不过那个女士，你妈妈，在睡觉。我想挪到她身边，可是莫德小姐看到我手里的字条了。于是她就看着我，就认出我了。她说，”过来，孩子，你手上弄伤了。“她抢在其他人看到之前，就把我拽过去，她把字条拿到桌子下面看，她扭我的手指头，劲太大了——”

“She got the letter off me and read it!” he said.

“她从我手里把字条拿过去，看了。”他说道。

“Who did?”

“谁看了？”

“She did nothing,” he said. “But she gave me this. She took it from the table where she sat. She gave it to me, as if it might be a secret; and then the tall man closed the watch up and she pushed me away. He gave me a pound, and I took it, and the red-headed girl let me out. Miss Maud watched me go, and her eyes were like eyes on fire; but she never said a word. She only gave me this, and I think she must have meant it for you but, oh miss! you can call me a fool, but God help me if I know what it’s for!”

“她什么也没做，”他说道。“不过她把这个给了我。她从她身边的桌子上拿的。她把这个塞给我，好象这是个秘密；然后告诉那个高个子把表装好，还把我推到一边。他给了我一镑钱，我收下了，那个红头发姑娘就让我出来了。莫德小姐看着我走，她的眼睛就好象是望着一团火；可是她一句话也没说。她就是把这个给了我，我觉得她给你这个，肯定是有意的，可是，噢，小姐！你可以说我是个傻子，可是上帝救救我，让我知道这是干什么的吧！”

“Stop crying!” I said. “Stop crying for once in your life, or I swear, I’ll hit you! Tell me now, what did she do?”

“别哭了！”我说道。“你这辈子就少哭一次吧，再哭我就揍你！我发誓！现在告诉我，她做什么了？”

He took a breath, and put his hand to his pocket, and brought something out.

他喘了一口气，手伸进口袋里，拿出一样东西。

His words began to dissolve, like salt in the water of his tears.

他的话语开始模糊，消解，就好象他眼泪水中的盐分。

“Just this?” I said. Charles nodded.

“就这个？”我说道。查尔斯点点头。

He handed it over. She had made it very small, and it took me a moment to unfold it and know what it was. When I did, I held it, and turned it, then turned it again; then I stood gazing stupidly at it.

他把那件东西递给我。她折得很小了，我花了点工夫，打开一看，我拿在手里，翻来覆去地看；然后我站在那儿，傻呆呆地望着那件东西。

It was a playing card. It was one of the playing cards from her old French deck at Briar. It was the Two of Hearts. It had got greasy, and was marked by the folds she had put in it; but it still had that crease, in the shape of her heel, across one of its painted red pips.

那是一张扑克牌，是她在布莱尔玩的那副旧纸牌中的一张。那是一张红桃二，已经有些油腻了，布满折痕；可是那道痕迹还在，那是她脚跟的形状，正横在一颗红心上。

“She’s making game of me,” I said, my voice not perfectly steady. “She has sent me this — you’re sure there’s no message on it, no mark or sign? — she has sent me this, to tease me. Why else?”

“她在向我挑衅，”我说道，我的声音已经不是很平稳了。“她把这个交给我，你确定她没有什么别的意思，别的记号或者信号？她给我这张牌，是想嘲弄我。还会为了什么呢？”

I held it, and remembered sitting with her in her parlour, springing the pack to tell her fortune. She had worn her blue gown. She had put her hand before her mouth. Now you are frightening me! she had said. How she must have laughed about it, later!

我拿着纸牌，想起我跟她一道坐在她的客厅里，翻开一张张纸牌，将她的命运告诉她。她穿着那件蓝色衣裳。手掩着嘴。她说，你在吓唬我！后来想到这一幕，她肯定窃笑不已！

“Gin?” We looked at each other.

“酒？”我俩面面相觑。

“What shall we do?” he asked me.

“我们该怎么办？”他问我。

“Miss, I don’t know. She took it from the table-top. She took it quick, and there was a — a wildness, about her eye.”

“小姐，我也不知道。她从桌面上拿到这张牌。她飞快地拿起来，她眼睛里——有一股狠劲。”

“What sort of a wildness?”

“什么狠劲？”

I did not know.

我也不知道。

“I must think,” I said, beginning to walk about. “I must think what she’ll do. She’ll tell Gentleman — won’t she? — and show him our letter. Then he’ll move, very quick, to find us. They didn’t see you come back here? Someone else might’ve, though. We can’t be sure. We’ve had luck on our side, so far; now our luck’s turning. Oh, if only I’d never taken that woman’s wedding-gown! — I knew it would make a bad fortune. Luck’s like the tide: it turns, then gets faster and can’t be stopped.”

“我得想想，”我说道，我开始到处度步。“我得想想她要干什么。她会告诉绅士——不是吗？——给他看我们的字条。然后他就行动起来了，非常迅速，来找我们。他们没看到你回这边来吧？就算他们没看到，也会有别人看到。我们也拿不准。到目前为止，我们还是占上风的；现在我们的运道要变了。噢！要是我没拿那个女人的结婚礼服就好了！——我早就知道这件衣裳要让我们倒大霉！运气就跟潮水一样：退潮了，就退得特别快，挡也挡不住。”

“I can’t say. She looked, not like herself. She wore no gloves. Her hair was curled and queer. There was a glass beside her place — I don’t like to say — I think it had gin in it.”

“我也说不清。她看上去，不像她自己了。她没戴手套。头发卷着，有点奇怪。身边还有个玻璃杯——我不该说——我觉得杯子里是酒。”

“Don’t say it!” cried Charles. He was wringing his hands. “Send the lady her gown back, can’t you?”

“别再说了！”查尔斯叫道。他两手紧紧绞着。“把那个女人的衣裳送回去，成吗？”

“You can’t cheat luck like that. The best you can do is, try and outface it.”

“你这样可糊弄不了老天爷。你最好这么做：想办法面对它，盯着它。”

“Outface it?”

“盯着它？”

I went to the window again, and gazed at the house.

我又走回窗边，凝视着那幢房子。

He stood, open mouthed, and did nothing. I got the knife myself, then took him by his wrist and led him from the room, down the slippery staircase.

他站起身，大张着嘴，一动不动。我自己拿了刀，然后拽住他的手腕，拉着他出了房间，走下那段容易滑脚的楼梯。

The street was blowing about with gusts of grit and paper, the night still hot. My head was bare. Anyone who saw me now would know me for Susan Trinder; but it was too late to care. I ran with Charles to Mr Ibbs’s door, knocked on it, then left him on the step while I stood aside with my back to the wall. The door was opened after a minute, just an inch.

街上刮着风，纸片儿和沙土都刮起来了，夜晚依旧炎热。我头就光着。现在任何人看到我，都会认出我就是苏珊。钱德；不过也顾不上了。我带查尔斯跑到艾伯斯先生的店门口，敲敲门，然后让他一个人站在台阶上，我闪到一旁，背贴着墙壁。过了一分钟，门开了，只开了一条缝。

“Mrs Sucksby is in there now,” I said. “Won’t one word from me do it? When did I ever let myself be frightened by John Vroom? Dainty I think won’t harm me; nor Mr Ibbs. And Maud sounds muddled by gin. Charles, I’ve been a fool to wait at all. Give me my knife. We are going over.”

“这会儿萨克丝贝太太在家，”我说道，“我说得话一个字都不起作用吗？我什么时候被约翰瓦儒吓倒过？达蒂我觉得她不会伤害我；艾伯斯先生也不会。莫德听起来，有点喝高了。查尔斯，把刀给我。我们这就过去。”

A man and a girl stood at the bottom, quarrelling; but their voices faded and they turned their heads to watch us as we went by. Perhaps they saw my knife. I had nowhere to hide it.

一个男子和一个姑娘站在楼下，正吵得不亦乐乎；不过我们下楼的时候，他们的声音低落下去，齐齐扭过头来望着我们。也许他们看到了我的刀。我找不到地方藏刀。

“Mrs Sucksby!” I cried. I made a charge at the door, and Dainty went flying. I caught Charles’s arm and pulled him into the shop. “Mrs Sucksby!” I shouted again. I ran to the hanging baize curtain and knocked it back. The passage beyond was dark, and I stumbled, and Charles stumbled with me. Then I reached the door at the end, and threw it open. There came heat, and smoke, and light, that made me wink. I saw Mr Ibbs first. He had come halfway to the door, hearing all the shouting.

“萨克丝贝太太！”我喊道。我猛地冲到门上，达蒂便飞出去了。我抓住查尔斯的胳膊，拖着他进了店里。“萨克丝贝太太！”我又大喊道。我奔到厚呢隔帘前，一把掀开帘子。后面的通道黑黢黢的，我脚底绊了一下，查尔斯跟着我也绊了一下。这时我手摸到了通道尽头的门，便狠命推开了门。扑面而来的热气，烟气，灯光，让我眨巴了几下眼睛。我先看到艾伯斯先生。他听到所有的嘈杂声音，正要过来查看，才走到一半。

“You’ve come too late.” It was Dainty’s voice. “Mr Ibbs says — Oh! It’s you again. What now? Changed your mind?”

“你来得太晚了。”是达蒂的声音。“艾伯斯先生说——噢！又是你。怎么回事？改主意了？”

The door was opened a little further. Charles stood, and licked his mouth, his eyes on Dainty’s. Then he looked at me; and when she saw him do that, she put out her head and also looked. Then she screamed.

门又打开一点。查尔斯站在那儿，舔舔嘴唇，眼睛看着达蒂，然后又看着我；她见他如此，便探出头来也要看。这时她惊叫一声。

When he saw me he stopped, and flung up his hands. Behind him was John Vroom, in his dog-skin coat; behind John Vroom — I saw her, and could have cried like a girl — was Mrs Sucksby. At the table, in Mrs Sucksby’s great chair, was Maud.

当他看到我时，便停住脚步，双手猛地举起来。他身后是约翰。瓦儒，穿着他那件狗皮外套；约翰。瓦儒身后——我一见她，就会象个傻姑娘一样号啕大哭——是萨克丝贝太太。桌子旁边，萨克丝贝太太的大摇椅上，正是莫德。

“Mrs Sucksby,” I said, turning to her. “They have told you lies. I never — They had me — him and her — locked up! And it has taken me all this time all this time, since May! — to get back to you.”

“萨克丝贝太太，”我扭头对着她，说道。“他们跟你说的都是谎言。我从来没有提防过——他们骗我——绅士和她！我费了这么长时间——从五月开始，这么长的时间！——才能回来找你。”

Beneath the chair was Charley Wag. He had begun to bark at the commotion. Now, seeing me, he barked more wildly and beat his tail, then came and rose up before me to give me his paws. The row was awful.

椅子下面是查理魏格。它已经开始为这阵骚动而狂吠不止了。这时，看到我，狗叫得更凶了，甩搭着尾巴，扑上来立在我面前，爪子便要抓过来。那狂吠声非常可怕。

Mr Ibbs reached forward and seized his collar and quickly jerked it back. He jerked so hard, Charley was almost throttled. I flinched away and lifted my arms. The others all watched me. If they had not seen my knife before, they saw it now. Mrs Sucksby opened her mouth. She said, “Sue, I — Sue –“

艾伯斯先生伸出手来，抓住狗脖子上的项圈，猛地把狗拉回去。他拉得太用力，查理险些给他勒死。我吓得跳到一旁，抬起了胳膊。其他人都望着我。如果他们先前没看到我手里的刀，那现在也看到了。萨克丝贝太太张大了嘴。她说道，“苏，我——苏——”

Then Dainty came running in behind me, from Mr Ibbs’s shop. “Where is she?” she cried. She had made her hands into fists. She pushed Charles aside, saw me, and stamped. “You’ve got some cheek, coming back here. You bitch! You have just about broke Mrs Sucksby’s heart!”

这时达蒂从艾伯斯先生的店里奔过来，在我身后叫道，“她在哪儿呢？”她两手早握了成拳头。她把查尔斯推开，就看到我了，她跳着脚。“你个厚颜无耻的东西，来呀。回来了。你个婊子！你让萨克丝贝太太伤透了心！”

“Keep off me,” I said, waving my knife. She looked at it in astonishment, then fell back. I wished she hadn’t; for there was something awful about it. She was only Dainty, after all. The knife began to shake.

“别拦着我，”我挥挥手里的刀子说道。她万分震惊地望着刀，然后退到一旁。我倒希望她没有退缩，因为这里还有更可怕的事。她毕竟只是达蒂。刀也开始抖了。

“Oh!” I cried, when I felt it. And I struggled away. “She has taken you from me, with jewels! With jewels and lies!”

当我感觉到硌时，我叫道，“噢！”我挣扎着让开。“她从我这里把你抢走了，用珠宝！用珠宝和谎言！”

Mrs Sucksby had her hand at her heart. She looked so surprised and afraid, it might have been her I was pointing the knife at. She looked at Mr Ibbs, and then she looked at Maud. Then she seemed to come to herself. She took two or three nimble steps across the kitchen and put her arms about me, tight.

萨克丝贝太太手捂着心口。她的样子非常惊讶，非常恐惧，可能是因为我拿刀对着她。她看看艾伯斯先生，又看看莫德。然后，她好象回过神来了。她轻巧地三步并做两步，穿过厨房走过来，张开双臂抱住我，紧紧地抱住我。

“Dear girl,” she said.

“好姑娘，”她说道。

She pressed my face against her bosom. Something hard struck my cheek. It was Maud’s diamond brooch.

她把我的脸按在她胸前。有个硬东西硌着我的脸了。那是莫德的钻石胸针。

“Dear girl,” said Mrs Sucksby again.

“好姑娘，”萨克丝贝太太又说一句。

She was dressed like a girl of the Borough, but her face was put back from the light, her eyes in shadow — she looked handsome and proud. Her hand was trembling, though.

她穿得像个镇子上的姑娘。可她的面孔却避开了光线，眼睛藏在阴影里——她看上去既俊俏，又骄傲。尽管如此，她的手却颤抖着。

But I looked at Maud. She had not flinched, or started, at sight of me, as the others all had; she had only — just like Mrs Sucksby — lifted her hand to her heart.

可是我却望着莫德。她见了我，并没有像别的人那样，她没有退缩，也没有发作；她只是——只是像萨克丝贝太太那样——抬手捂住心口。

She swallowed. “You had much better not have come here, Sue,” she said. “You had much better have stayed away.”

她咽了一下口水。“你最好没来过这儿，苏，”她说道。“你最好别待在这儿。”

“That’s right,” I said, when I saw that. “You shake.”

我见她如此，便说道，“这就对了，你发抖了。”

“Hey! hey!” said Mr Ibbs. He had taken out a handkerchief and was wiping his brow. He looked at Mrs Sucksby. She still had her arms about me, and I could not see her face. But I felt her grip grow slack as she reached to take the knife from my hands.

“嗨！嗨！”艾伯斯先生说道。他掏出了手帕，正在擦拭额头。他望着萨克丝贝太太。她的双臂仍旧抱着我，我看不到她的面孔。不过我能感觉到她伸手去拿我手里的刀时，胳膊松了。

“Girl-fight!” cried John, with a clap of his hands.

“大姑娘打架啦！”约翰拍了下巴掌叫道。

“You can say so!” I cried. Her voice was clear, and sweet. I remembered hearing it, now, in my dreams at the madhouse. “You can say so, you cheat, you snake, you viper!”

“你可以这么说！”我叫道。她的声音清晰而甜美。这时，我想起在疯人院的梦境里，听到过这个声音。“你可以这么说，你个骗子，你个毒蛇，你这个毒辣的家伙！”

“Dear girl,” said Mrs Sucksby again, over her words. “This is so astonishingly queer. This is so — Only look at you! Like a regular — ha, ha! — soldier.” She wiped her mouth. “What say you sit down, now, and be nice? What say we send Miss Lilly upstairs, if looking at her upsets you? Eh? And there’s John and Dainty: let’s ask them, shall we?” — she jerked her head — “to slip upstairs, too?”

“好姑娘，”萨克丝贝太太抢过她的话头，又说道。“这怪事可太叫人吃惊了。这可太——就看着我！要象个守规矩的——哈，哈！——士兵一样。”她抹抹嘴。“现在你坐下来，好好说，如何？要是看到李小姐让你觉得难受，那就让她上楼去，如何？哦？这儿还有约翰和达蒂：我们让他们，”——她脑袋忽地抬起来——“也到楼上去？”

“Why, he’s a sharp one, ain’t he?” she said, with a nervous laugh. She put the knife gently on the table. I leaned and snatched it up again.

“干嘛？他是个精明人，不是吗？”她说着，露出一个紧张的笑容。她轻轻地将刀放在桌子上。我侧身又把刀抢到手中。

“Sue, listen to me,” said Maud.

“苏，听我说。”莫德说道。

“Don’t leave it,” I said, “where she might get it! Oh, Mrs Sucksby, you don’t know what a devil she is!”

“不要把刀，”我说道，“放在她能拿到的地方！噢，萨克丝贝太太，你可不知道她是什么样儿的魔鬼！”

She put her fingers to her cheek. “Helped you so far as that, did he?” she said, with her eyes on Charles. She smiled. “Then he’s a dear boy; and we shall be sure to pay him out. Shan’t we, Mr Ibbs?”

她手捧着自己的脸。“他帮了你这么大的忙，是吗？”她说着，眼睛盯着查尔斯。她露出微笑。“那他真是个好孩子，我们肯定要好好报答他，对吧？艾伯斯先生？”

He had taken off his cap, and was biting the band of it. He went to the door, his face so pale, in the shadows, it seemed to glow.

他早就摘下了帽子，正在咬帽子上的带子。他走到门边儿上，小脸儿煞白，到了暗处，看上去似乎要发出光来了。

“Charles, stand behind me, by the door to the shop. Keep them from running to it, should they try.”

我冲查尔斯点点头。“查尔斯，站到我后面去，站到通道的门旁边。”

“I said, stay!” I cried.

“我说了，待着！”我大喊。

“Sit down, son,” Mr Ibbs said quietly. John sat. I nodded to Charles.

“坐下，孩子。”艾伯斯先生轻轻地说道。约翰坐下了。

I waved the knife. “You, John Vroom, stay,” I said. And then, to Mrs Sucksby and Mr Ibbs: “They’ll go for Gentleman! Don’t trust them!”

我舞着刀子。“你，约翰。瓦儒，待着，”我说道。然后又对着萨克丝贝太太和艾伯斯先生：“他们会去找绅士！不要信他们！”

John looked at him and laughed.

约翰望着他，笑起来。

“You leave him alone,” I said at once. “He has been a friend to me, more ever than you were. Mrs Sucksby, I should never have got back to you, without him. I should never have got free of — of the madhouse.”

“你别招他，”我立即说道。“他是我的朋友，可比你强多了。萨克丝贝太太，没有他，我就永远也不能回来见你了。我就永远都不能重获自由，从那个——那个疯人院逃出来了。”

“She’s lost her mind,” said John, rising from his chair. I made a swipe at the sleeve of his coat.

“她失心疯了，”约翰说着，从椅子上站起来。我作势刮了一下他外套的袖子。

He looked at Mrs Sucksby. She looked at Mr Ibbs.

他看看萨克丝贝太太，她则望着艾伯斯先生。

“Don’t let them go!” I cried, as Dainty began to move. “Not her, not them!”

达蒂动脚的时候，我叫道，“不要让他们走！她留下，他们都留下！”

I curled my lip at her. ” Gentleman,” I said. ” Gentleman. You have learned Borough habits very quick.”

我对她撇撇嘴。“绅士，”我说道，“绅士。你学镇子的规矩，倒学得挺快嘛。”

“You must go, Charles,” she said, in her clear, low voice. “You must go from here.” She looked at me. The look was strange. “You must both go, before Gentleman comes back.”

“你必须走，查尔斯，”她用她那清晰的声音，低声说道。“你必须离开这里。”她望着我。那神情有些古怪。“绅士回来之前，你们两个都必须走。”

Mr Ibbs said nothing. Maud leaned from her chair.

艾伯斯先生什么都没说。莫德从椅子上探过身子。

The blood rose in her cheek. “I am changed,” she murmured. “I am not what I was.”

血色涌到她脸上。“我确实有所改变，”她喃喃说道。“我不是原来那个我了。”

“You are not,” I said.

“你确实不是。”我说道。

She did not answer.

她没做声。

She lowered her eyes. She looked at her hands. And then, as if seeing that they were bare — and as if one could cover the bareness of the other — she put them awkwardly together. There came the faint jingle of metal: she had, upon her wrist, two or three thin silver bangles, of a kind I had used to like to wear. She held them, to make them be still; then lifted her head again and caught my gaze.

她垂下眼帘，望着自己的双手。然后，仿佛才见到赤条条的手似的——又仿佛这只手能掩护那只手似的——她忽然双手紧握。这时传来金属撞击的叮当声：她的手腕上，戴着三两只银手镯，正是我过去喜欢戴的那种手镯。她按住手镯，让它们安静下来。然后抬起头，盯着我的眼睛。

“Well?” I said.

“嗯？”我说道。

I said, in a hard, steady voice: “Was being a lady not enough for you, that you must come to the Borough and take the things that were ours?”

我的声音难过而平稳：“你做个千金小姐还不满足，还非要到镇子上来，拿走我们的东西？”

She began to try to draw free the bangles. “Take them,” she said. “I don’t want them!”

她试着想取下镯子。“拿走，”她说道，“我才不想要这些玩意！”

“You think I want them?”

“你以为我想要这些玩意？”

Mrs Sucksby stepped forward, her own hands darting towards Maud’s.

萨克丝贝太太快步向前，两只手朝莫德的手飞过去。

“Let them stay!” she cried.

“留着，别动！”她叫道。

Her voice was hoarse. She looked at me, then gave an awkward sort of laugh.

她声音嘶哑，她望着我，然后挤出一个尴尬的笑容。

“Dear girl,” she said, moving back, “what’s silver, in this house? What’s silver, compared with the joy of seeing your face?”

“好姑娘，”她退回去说道，“银子算什么？在这个房子里？就说见到你这张小脸儿，我那股高兴劲哟，比起来，银子算什么？”

She put one hand to her throat, and leaned with the other upon the back of a chair. She leaned heavily, and the chair-legs grated on the floor.

她一只手按在脖子上，另一只手抓着椅子背，身子弯下去。她人弯得太狠，椅子腿儿撑在地板上，咯吱作响。

“Dainty,” she said, “fetch me out a tumbler of brandy, will you? This turn of things’ve quite undone me.”

“达蒂，”她说道，“给我拿杯白兰地来，好吗？这一连串的事儿，实在叫我吃不消啦。”

Like Mr Ibbs, she took out a handkerchief and passed it over her face. Dainty gave her her drink, and she sipped it, and sat.

跟艾伯斯先生一样，她也拿出一块手帕来，抹了抹脸。达蒂把酒递给她，她喝了一小口，然后坐下来。

“Come beside me,” she said to me. “Put down that old knife, won’t you?” And then, when I hesitated: “What, afraid of Miss Lilly? With me and Mr Ibbs — and your own pal Charles — to mind you? Come, sit.”

“过来，坐到我身边来，”她对我说道。“把那把老刀子放下吧，好不好？”然后，见我犹豫着：“干嘛，怕李小姐？有我和艾伯斯先生——还有你自己的小兄弟查尔斯——关照你，你还怕什么？过来，坐。”

I looked again at Maud. I had thought her a viper, but, in the bringing and pouring of the brandy the lamp had got moved about, and I saw in the light of it how slight and pale and tired she was.

我又看一眼莫德。我原本以为她是条毒蛇，可是，趁达蒂拿酒倒酒，灯让她提着满屋子转的空当，我借着灯光看清楚了，她是多么瘦弱，多么苍白，多么疲倦。

I sat, and put the knife before me. Mrs Sucksby took my hand. I said, “I have been done very wrong, Mrs Sucksby.”

我坐下来，把刀摆在面前。萨克丝贝太太抓住我的手。我说道，“我被他们害得太惨了，萨克丝贝太太。”

At Mrs Sucksby’s cry, she had fallen still; her hands still shook, however, and she rested her head against the high back of her chair, as if the weight of it hurt her. Her face was damp. A few strands of hair clung to it. Her eyes were darker than they ought to have been, and seemed to glitter.

被萨克丝贝太太一喊，她便停住不动了；可是她的双手仍旧颤抖不止，她将头靠在高高的椅子背上，仿佛承受不起脑袋的分量。她一脸沮丧。几绺头发粘在脸上。她的双眼比原先更加幽亮阴郁，好像要发射出光线似的。

John whistled. “Double-cross,” he said. “Nice work but — oh!” He laughed. “You pigeon!”

约翰吹了一声口哨。“被出卖掉，”他说道。“干得漂亮，不过——噢！”他大笑。“你个白痴！”

“God knows what lies they’ve told you! The truth is, she was in it with him from the start. They set me up, between them, to take her place; and they put me in the madhouse, where everyone supposed me to be her –“

“老天知道他们跟你说了些什么鬼话！真相是，从一开始，她就卷进去了，她跟绅士是一伙的。他们把我拉进去，放在他们中间，好取代她；他们把我送进了疯人院，那儿每个人都以为我是她——”

Which is what I had known, all along, he would say; though now, it did not seem to matter. Mrs Sucksby looked, not at me, but at our joined hands. She was smoothing her thumb upon mine. I thought the news had stunned her.

我早知道他会说这种话；不过如今，这些话都无关紧要了。萨克丝贝太太怔怔地盯着，没盯着我，而是盯着我俩握在一道的手。她的大拇指轻轻地摩挲着我的手。我以为她被这些事吓呆了。

“A bad business,” she said quietly.

“真是坏，”她轻轻说道。

Mrs Sucksby slowly shook her head. “My dear, I begin to see it,” she said.

萨克丝贝太太缓缓地摇摇头。“我亲爱的，我感觉到了，”她说道。

“Did they torture you, with tongs?” asked John. “Did they put you in a straitcoat?”

“他们拷打你了吗？用火钳？”约翰问道。“他们给你穿紧身衣了吗？”

I hesitated again, then said, “They sewed it to my head.”

我又犹豫了一下，然后说道，“他们把我的头发都盘到顶上，扎起来。”

I hesitated, then glanced at Charles.

我犹豫了，然后看一眼查尔斯。

“Did they cut it?” said Dainty, sitting, putting a hand before her mouth. Her mouth had a fading bruise beside it — from John, I suppose. “Did they shave it off?”

“他们给你剃头了？”达蒂坐在那儿，一只手掩着嘴。她嘴边有块消褪的淤青印子——那是约翰打的，我觉得。“他们把你的头发都剃光了？”

“Boots without laces,” I said. “They thought that, if they gave me laces, I should hang myself. And my hair –“

“没鞋带的鞋，”我说道。“他们觉得，要是给我鞋带，我就会投缳自尽。还有我的头发——”

“Worse than that!” I cried. “Oh, much, much worse! A madhouse, Mrs Sucksby! With nurses, that hurt and starved me! I was hit one time, so hard –! I was dropped — I was dropped in a bath –!”

“比那个更坏！”我叫道。“噢，坏多了，坏多了！疯人院，萨克丝贝太太！那里面的护士，打我，还想饿死我！我被他们打过一回，打得好狠——！我被他们扔到——我被他们扔到澡盆子里——！”

She drew free her hand and raised it before her face. “No more, dear girl! No more. I can’t bear to hear it.”

她抽开手，抬手挡在面前。“别再说了，好姑娘！别再说了。我听不得这些事。”

“Of iron?”

“铁做的？”

“They put me in a tartan gown, and boots of –“

“他们给我穿花格呢衣裳，穿的鞋是——”

“That’s all right,” I said. “You weren’t to know.” I turned again to Mrs Sucksby, and touched the skirt of my dress. “This gown I stole,” I said. “And these shoes. And I walked, nearly all the way to London. My only thought was to get back here to you. For worse than all the cruel things that were done to me in the madhouse was the thought of the lies that Gentleman must have told you, about where I had gone. I supposed at first, he would have said that I had died.”

“没关系，”我说道。“你也不了解情况。”我又转过去，对着萨克丝贝太太，手摸着我身上穿的裙子。“这件衣裳是我偷的，”我说道。“还有这双鞋。我是走回来的，进伦敦的路我都快走遍了。我唯一的念头就是回到这里，找到你。因为，一想到绅士肯定会跟你鬼话连篇，说我跑到哪里哪里去了，对我来说，这比在疯人院遭受的所有折磨都更令我感到痛苦。刚开始我以为，他会说我已经死了。”

Her eyes filled with tears. “Oh, Sue!” she said. “I swear, I never meant it when I called you a bitch just now!”

她双眼满含泪水。“噢，苏！”她说道。“我发誓，刚才我叫你婊子，我真的没有那个意思！”

“Dear girl, I — Oh, I should have got you, too, in another month more! — only, you know, I kept my searching quiet from John and Dainty.”

“好姑娘，我——噢，再有一个月的工夫，我也能找到你！——只是，你知道，我一直在悄悄地找你，没让约翰和达蒂知道”

I looked into Mrs Sucksby’s face. “But I knew you wouldn’t believe it,” I said, “of your own daughter.”

我凝视着萨克丝贝太太的面孔。“可是我知道，你不会相信的，”我说道。“你不会相信你的亲生女儿会这样。”

“Did you, Mrs Sucksby?” said Dainty.

“你找过她，萨克丝贝太太？”达蒂说道。

“But I knew you would ask for my body.”

“可是我知道你会追问我尸体的下落。”

She took my hand again. “He might,” she said, “have thought of it.”

她又抓住我的手。“他可能，”她说道，“是想这么说来着。”

“Then I guessed what he would say. He would say I had cut with the money, and cheated you all.”

“于是我猜想他会说什么。他会说我把钱卷跑了，把你们大伙儿都耍了。”

“My dear, I did. I sent out a man, confidentially.” She wiped her lips. She looked at Maud, But Maud had her eyes upon me. I suppose the lamp that lit her face also lit mine, for she said, softly and suddenly, “You look ill, Sue.”

“我亲爱的，我找过。我派了个人去找，偷偷地去找。”她抹抹嘴巴，又看一眼莫德。可莫德的眼睛盯着我。我觉得那灯光照亮了她的脸，也照亮了我的脸，因为她忽然柔声说道，“你看上去很憔悴，苏。”

“He did,” said John. He sucked his tooth. “I always said that you hadn’t the nerve.”

“他是这么说的，”约翰说道，他嘬了一下牙。“我就说你没那个胆儿呢。”

Her grip on my hand grew tight. “I knew you would look for me, until you found me.”

她攥着我的手，手上忽然加了力。“我就知道你会找我，不找到我不罢休。”

“Wouldn’t I! Straight off!”

“我怎么不会！一杆子追到底！”

It was the third time she had spoken my name. I heard it and — despite myself — I thought of the other times she had said it, so softly as that, and felt myself colour.

这是她第三次说出我的名字。我听在耳中——我不禁——想起先前她叫我的名字，也是这么温柔，我觉得自己脸红了。

“You do look done up,” said Dainty. “You look like you ain’t slept in a week.”

“你看上去真的筋疲力尽了，”达蒂说道。“你看上去，好象一个星期都没睡觉。”

“I haven’t,” I said.

“我是有一个星期没睡了，”我说道。

“Then why,” said Mrs Sucksby, making to rise, “won’t you go upstairs now, and put your head down? And then tomorrow, me and Dainty will come and fix you up in one of your old gowns, and dress your hair –“

“那为什么，”萨克丝贝太太说道，作势欲站起身来，“你现在不上楼去，好好睡一觉？到明天，我和达蒂会上来，帮你收拾一下，就给你穿你以前的衣裳，再帮你梳梳头——”

I took up my knife again, and she drew her hand back. I said, “You think I don’t know danger? You think that, in looking at you, I’m not seeing danger with a face — a false face, with an actress mouth — with lying blushes, and two brown treacherous eyes?”

我又抓起了刀，她便收回了手。我说道，“你因为我不知道危险？你以为，看到你的脸，从你那张脸——虚伪的脸，还有一张戏子的巧嘴巴——脸上还假装着羞红了，和两只狡诈的褐色眼睛，我都看不出危险来？”

Mrs Sucksby shifted in her seat. Maud kept her glittering gaze on mine. “You came to Briar,” she said, “to do that…”

萨克丝贝太太坐在椅子上，身子动了动。莫德幽亮的眼睛死死盯着我的眼睛。“你来布莱尔，”她说道，“也是要这么干…”

The words were like clinker on my tongue: they were awful, but I must spit them out or swallow them and choke. She held my gaze, and her eyes did not seem treacherous, at all. I turned the knife. The blade took up the light of the lamp and sent it darting across her cheek.

我说出这番话，好似吐出舌尖上的滚烫煤渣：这些话很不象话，可是我必须痛快地说出来，否则，把这些话吞进肚子，会噎死自个儿的。她迎着我的目光，她眼里好似一丁点狡诈也没有。我把玩着手里的刀。刀刃将灯光反射过去，正投射在她脸上。

“Don’t go to sleep here, Sue!” said Maud, leaning from her chair and putting her hand towards me. “There’s danger here.”

“别睡在这儿，苏！”莫德说道，她从椅子上探起身子，手伸向我。“这儿有危险。”

“I came here to kill you,” I said.

“我来这儿就是要杀了你。”我说道。

Then I looked away and let the knife fall. I felt suddenly tired, and sick. I felt all the walking I had done, and all the careful watching. Now nothing was as I had thought it would be. I turned to Mrs Sucksby. “Can you sit,” I said, “and hear her tease me? Can you know the wicked trick she played me, and have her here, and not want to throttle her?” I meant it; and yet it sounded like bluster, too. I looked around the room. “Mr Ibbs, can you?” I said. “Dainty, shouldn’t you like to shake her to pieces, in my behalf?”

这时我移开视线，任手中的刀掉落在地。我忽然觉得疲惫不堪，非常难受。我觉得我这一路上的辛苦，还有小心翼翼地窥视，如今跟我先前认为的相比，什么都不是了。我转过来对着萨克丝贝太太。“你能坐在这儿，听凭她挑衅我，而无动于衷吗？你知道了她蒙骗我的恶毒把戏之后，还能眼睁睁看着她在这儿，却不掐死她？”我故意说出这些话；可是这话听起来却像是恐吓。我环顾房间。“艾伯斯先生，你能吗？”我说道。“达蒂，你就不想帮我讨回公道，上去把她撕成碎片吗？”

“All right, Dainty,” said Mrs Sucksby quickly.

“好了，达蒂，”萨克丝贝太太飞快地说道。

“Shouldn’t I!” said Dainty. She showed her fist. “Cheat my best pal, would you?” she said to Maud. “Lock her up in a madhouse and sew up her hair?” Maud said nothing, but slightly turned her head. Dainty shook her fist again, then let it sink. She caught my eye. “Seems an awful shame, though, Sue. Miss Lilly turning out to be such a sport, and all. And brave? I done her ears last week, and she never cried once. And then, she has took to taking stitches out, that natural –“

“我怎么不想！”她挥挥拳头。“骗了我最好的朋友，是你吧？”她对莫德说道。“把她锁到疯人院里，还把她的头发都扎起来？”莫德什么都没说，头却微微地转到一边。达蒂又挥挥拳头，然后放下拳头，望着我的眼睛。“这好象是一桩很丢人的事儿，苏。李小姐搞出这么一个局，和所有的事儿。挺厉害的？上个星期我还帮她穿了耳朵眼儿，她连叫也没叫一声。后来，我又帮她把针抽出来，自然——”

“You have taken everything that was mine,” I said. “You have taken it, and made it better.”

“你把原本属于我的一切都夺走了，”我说道。“你夺走了一切，还变本加厉。”

I looked again at Maud — at her neat ear which, I now saw, had a crystal drop falling from it on a wire of gold; and at the curls in her fair hair; and at her dark eye-brows. They had been tweezered into two fine arches. Above her chair — I had not seen this before, either, but it seemed all of a piece with the drops, the curls and arches, the bangles on her wrist — above her chair there was hanging, from a beam, a little cage of wicker with a yellow bird in it. I felt tears rise into my throat.

我又望着莫德——望着她小巧的耳朵，这时我才看到，她耳朵上有一副水晶耳坠垂下来，耳坠悬在金线上；我目光又落到她美丽秀发的卷儿上；和她深色的双眉上。那眉毛被人修剪成两道优美精致的曲线。她椅子上方——这也是我之前没有看到的，可是这跟她的耳坠儿，发卷儿，眉型，和她手腕上的手镯一样——她椅子上方，有个柳枝编起的笼子，挂在房梁上，笼子里装着一只鸟儿。我觉得泪水涌到了喉咙口。

“I took it,” she answered, ” because it was yours. Because I must!”

“我夺走了一切，”她答道，“正因为这些东西原本是属于你的。因为我必须这么做！”

“For villainy’s sake,” she said flatly. “For villainy’s sake. Because you were right, before: my face is a false one, my mouth is an actress mouth, my blushes tell lies, my eyes — My eyes — ” She looked away. Her voice had begun to rise. She made it flat again. “Richard found that, after all, we must wait for our money, longer than we thought.”

“为了做坏事，”她冷冷地说道。“为了做坏事。因为你是对的，刚才你说：我的脸是虚伪的脸，我脸色变红是为了骗人，我的眼睛——我的眼睛——”她目光转向别处。她声音开始提高了。她让自己的声音再次平静下来。“反正，理查德发觉，我们必须等着我们的钱，要等得比我们原先想象的更长。”

“Why must you? Why?”

“为什么你必须这么做？为什么？”

She opened her mouth to speak. Then she looked at Mrs Sucksby and her face changed.

她张着嘴巴正要说话，这时她看到萨克丝贝太太，然后她的脸色变了。

Mrs Sucksby said nothing.

萨克丝贝太太什么都没说。

“You haven’t got the money?”

“你们还没弄到钱？”

But I did not want the money; and when I spoke, my voice sounded hateful to me.

可是我并不想要钱；我说话的时候，我的声音，连我自己听来都觉可憎。

She took up her glass in both her hands, and swallowed what was left in it.

她双手捧住玻璃杯，将杯中剩余之物一口吞下。

She put the glass back down. “Not yet.”

她将杯子放回原处。“还没有。”

“That’s something, then,” I said. “I shall want a share of that. I shall want half of it. Mrs Sucksby, do you hear? They shall give me half their fortune, at least. Not a stinking three thousand, but a half. Think what we shall do, with that!”

“那正好，”我说道。“我得分一笔。我要一半。萨克丝贝太太，你听了到吗？他们得把他们一半的钱给我，至少。不是臭烘烘的三千镑，而是一半。想想看吧，有了这笔钱，我们该干点什么！”

“Go from here? Because you tell me to? This is my home! Mrs Sucksby — Mrs Sucksby, will you tell her?”

“离开这儿？就因为你要我走？这是我的家！萨克丝贝太太——萨克丝贝太太，你不跟她说说吗？”

Maud said, “You shall have what you like. I will give you anything, anything at all — if you will only go from here, now, before Richard comes back.”

莫德说道，“你会得到你想要的东西。我会给你一切，一切的一切——如果你肯离开这儿，就现在，在理查德回来之前。”

Mrs Sucksby again passed a hand across her mouth. “There again, Susie,” she said slowly, “Miss Lilly might be right. If there is the money to be thought of, you might do well, for now, to keep out of Gentleman’s way. Let me speak with him, first. I’ll give him a taste of my temper, though!”

萨克丝贝太太又抬手掩住了嘴。“话说回来，苏西，”她慢慢地说道，“没准儿李小姐是对的呢。要是有一笔钱，整天给人惦记着，那眼下你就该合作点儿，避开绅士。先让我跟他说说。不过，我会给他点颜色看看！”

I guessed she was thinking about Maud’s fortune, and how it might be cut. I couldn’t help but wish that, after all, the money was nothing to her.

我猜，她是想到了莫德的钱财，以及这笔钱会如何被人卷走。我别无他法，只有暗地里希望，她能视钱财如粪土。

She said it in a queer, half-hearted way, with a try at a smile — as she might have said it, I thought, if she had just found out that Gentleman had swindled her out of two or three shillings at cards.

她以一种古怪的，并不真挚的（half-hearted）腔调说出这番话，还想挤出一个微笑——我觉得，要是她刚发觉绅士玩牌出千，骗了她三两个先令，也会说出这么一番话。

“Will you make me go,” I said again to Mrs Sucksby, “and let her stay?” Now my voice was broken as a boy’s. “Will you trust them, not to send Dr Christie to me? Will you — Will you take her gowns, will you take the pins from her head, will you kiss her, will you let her sleep beside you in my old place, while I lie in a bed with — with red hairs in it?”

“你会让我走，”我又对萨克丝贝太太说道，“让她留下吗？”此时，我声音嘶哑，跟男孩子的声音一样。“你会相信他们，不会带克里斯蒂医生来抓我？你会——你会帮她更衣吗？你要帮她取下发卡？你会亲她吗？你会让她睡在你身边，睡在我以前睡的地方，而我却躺在一张——一张带着红毛儿的床上吗？”

I said, “Will you make me go?” The words came out like a whisper. I looked away from her, about the kitchen — at the old Dutch clock on the shelf, and the pictures on the walls. On the floor by the door to the stairs was the white china chamber-pot, with the dark eye in it, from my own room, that must have been brought down to be washed and then forgotten. I would not have forgotten it. On the table beneath my hand was a heart: I had scratched it into the wood, the summer before. I had been like a child still, then. I had been like an infant — I looked about me again. Why were there no babies? The kitchen was still. Everyone was still, and watching me.

我说道，“你会让我走吗？”这句话说出来，像蚊子叫一样（like a whisper）。我目光从她身上移开，扫视一圈厨房——看到搁板上的旧荷兰钟，和墙上的画片儿。通向楼梯的门边地板上，放着那个白瓷夜壶，里面有只黑眼睛，是我房里用的，肯定是拿下来洗，后来又忘了拿上去。我可忘不了它。桌面上，我手盖住的地方有一颗心：那是前一个夏天我刻在桌面上的。那时候我还像个孩子。我像个毛头孩子——我又环顾四周。怎么这儿没小孩子了？厨房里静悄悄的。每个人都默不作声，都望着我。

“Sleep beside me?” said Mrs Sucksby quickly. “Who told you that?”

“睡在我旁边？”萨克丝贝太太飞快地说道。“谁跟你说的？”

But Maud had lifted her head, her gaze grown sharp. “You have watched us!” she said. And then, when she had thought it through: “At the shutter!”

可莫德却已经扬起了头，她的目光变得凌厉。“你监视我们！”她说道。然后，等她全想通了，又说：“从那个百叶窗里！”

“I’ve watched you,” I answered, more strongly. “I’ve watched you, you spider! taking everything of mine. You would rather do that — God damn you! — than sleep with your own husband!”

“我是监视过你们，”我更理直气壮地答道。“我就监视你，你个毒蜘蛛！夺走了我的一切！你就喜欢这样——上帝要惩罚你！——比跟你丈夫一起睡还喜欢！”

“Red hairs?” said John.

“红毛儿？”约翰说道。

“Sleep with — with Richard?” She looked astounded. “You don’t suppose –?”

“跟——跟理查德一起睡？”她大吃一惊的样子。“你不会以为——？”

“Sue,” said Maud at the same time, leaning across the table and also reaching for me. “You don’t suppose him anything to me? You don’t think him a husband to me, in anything but name? Don’t you know I hate him? Don’t you know I hated him, at Briar?”

与此同时，莫德说道，“苏，”她身子探到桌边，又朝我伸出手来。“你不会以为他是我的一切吧？你不会以为，除了名义上之外，他真是我丈夫吧？你不知道我讨厌他吗？你不知道我在布莱尔就讨厌他吗？”

I said, “Will you pretend, that you aren’t a swindling cheat?”

我说道，“你还要装？装得好象你不是个高明的骗子？”

“Susie,” said Mrs Sucksby, putting her hand upon me.

“苏西，”萨克丝贝太太说道，将她的手放在我身上。

“Will you make out now,” I said, in a kind of trembling scorn, “that you only did what you did because he made you?”

“你现在是不是又要作戏，装得好象你做那些事，只因为有他逼迫你？”

“He did make me! — But, not in the way you mean.”

“他确实逼迫我！——可是，并不是你想的那样。”

“Anything. Something. I don’t know what…”

“什么都可以。有些事。我也不知道是什么…”

“There was no other way,” she said. “You saw my life. I needed you, to be me.”

“再没有别的法子了，”她说道。“你也看到我过的日子。我需要你，成为我。”

“Why not? You are an actress. You are acting now!”

“怎么笑不出？你是个女戏子——你现在就在演戏！”

“So you might come here, and be me!” She did not answer. I said, “We might have cheated him. If you had told me. We might have –“

“于是你就可以来到这儿，再成为我！”她没回答。我说道，“我们本来可以骗过他。只要你跟我说了。我们本来可以——”

Then after a moment I said, more quietly, “I hated it. I didn’t smile, with him, when your back was turned.”

而后过了片刻，我静静地说道，“我恨哪。你一转过身，我对着他就笑不出了。”

Her gaze was so dark, yet so steady and true; but I grew aware, all at once, of Mrs Sucksby — of John and Dainty, Mr Ibbs — all of them, watching, silent and curious, thinking, What’s this…?

她目光如此阴郁，却又如此沉着，如此真实；而我忽然醒觉，意识到萨克丝贝太太——约翰和达蒂，艾伯斯先生——他们所有人，都看着呢，默不作声，好奇心起，心想，这怎么回事…？

She said it, still with her eyes on my face, still with her hand reaching for mine but falling short of taking it. The light was all upon us, the rest of the kitchen almost dark. I looked at her fingers. They were marked with dirt, or bruised. I said, “If you hated him, why did you do it?”

她嘴里说出这句话，眼睛还盯着我的脸，灯光都照在我们身上，厨房里其他地方几乎漆黑一片。我望着她的双手。那双手上有些污迹，要么是淤痕。我说道，“如果你讨厌他，那为什么你要那么做？”

“Am I?”

“我是戏子？”

“What?”

“什么？”

“You think I did?”

“你以为我对着他笑得出？”

She said, “Will you?” And again, she held my gaze; and again, I was almost shamed by it, and looked away.

她说道，“你要装吗？”她再一次盯着我的眼睛；而我遇到她的目光，几乎羞惭难当，又一次看向别处。

She shook her head. “How much,” she asked quietly, “would you have given up?”

她摇摇头。“你会放弃到，”她轻轻地说道，“什么程度呢？”

“Don’t touch me!” I said, as I did it. I got to my feet. “Don’t any of you touch me!” My voice was wild. “Not any of you! Do you hear me? I came back here, thinking this my home; now you want to cast me out again. I hate you all! I wish I had stayed in the country!”

我边戳边说道，“别碰我！”我霍地站起身来。“你再也不要碰我！”我的声音是疯狂的。“一下也不能碰！你听到没有？我回到这儿，还以为这儿是我的家；现在你又想把我丢出去。我恨你们每个人！我真希望我还待在乡下！”

I looked from face to face. Dainty had begun to cry. John sat, open-mouthed and astonished. Mr Ibbs had his hand at his cheek. Maud nursed her bleeding fingers.

我目光从这张脸上，转到那张脸上。达蒂开始哭了。约翰坐在那儿，大张着嘴，惊得呆住了。艾伯斯先生手扶着脸。莫德照管着她淌血的手指头。

And in that moment, I saw into my own cowardly heart and knew that I would have given up nothing for her, nothing at all; and that, sooner than be shamed by her now, I would die. She reached again. Her fingers brushed my wrist. I took up the knife and jabbed at her hand.

就在那一刻，我望进我那颗怯懦的心，我明白了，我不会为她放弃任何事，根本什么事都不会；如今我在她面前羞惭难当，而在此之前，我就该死掉的。她手又伸过来。她的指头扫过我的手腕。我一把抓起刀，朝她的手戳过去。

Charles shook. Mrs Sucksby said, “Sue, put down the knife. Cast you out? The idea! I –“

查尔斯哆嗦着。萨克丝贝太太说道，“苏，放下刀。把你扔出去？这点子！我——”

Then she stopped. Charley Wag had lifted his head. From Mr Ibbs’s shop there came the sound of a key, turning in a lock. Then came the kicking of boots; then whistling.

这时，她顿住了。查理威格抬起了它的狗头。从艾伯斯先生的店里，传来一阵钥匙在锁眼儿里转动的声音。

“Gentleman!” she said. She looked at Maud, at Mr Ibbs, at me. She got up, and leaned to catch at my arm. “Sue,” she said, as she did it. She spoke in a voice that was almost a whisper. “Susie, sweetheart, will you come upstairs…?”

“绅士！”她说道。她看看莫德，又看看艾伯斯先生，再看着我。她说话的声音几乎轻不可闻。“苏西，乖宝，要不你上楼去…？”她站起来，弯腰抓住我的胳膊。“苏，”她抓着我的胳膊说道。

“Hallo,” he said, “here’s Charles.” He winked. Then he looked at me, and at my knife. “Hallo, here’s Sue.” He took off his hat and began to unwind the scarlet cloth from his throat. “I supposed you might come. Had you left it another day, I should have been ready. I have just now collected a letter, from that fool Christie. He certainly dragged his heels, in letting me know of your escape! I think he planned to recapture you before he should have to. Bad publicity, when one’s lady lunatics run.”

“哈罗，苏也来了。”他摘下帽子，开始解下颈项上那块深红色丝巾。“我想到你会来的。你要是晚到一天的话，我就都预备妥当了。我刚收到一封信，是那个蠢货克里斯蒂来的信。在告知我你逃跑的这件事上，他显然是故意慢了一拍！我想，他是计划在不得不告知我之前，先把你抓回去。要是谁家的疯小姐跑了，名声就坏了。”

But I did not answer, only gripped the knife more firmly. Charley Wag gave a feeble bark, and Gentleman heard him, and barked in reply. Then he whistled again, a lazy waltz tune, and we heard him stumbling along the passage and watched as he pushed at the door. I think he was drunk. His hat was crooked, his cheek quite pink, his mouth a perfect O. He stood, and slightly swayed, and looked about the room, squinting into the shadows. The whistle died. His lips grew straight, and he licked them.

可我并未答话，只是牢牢地攥着刀。查理威格有气无力地汪了一声，绅士听到了，他也汪了一声，作为回应。然后他又吹口哨，吹的是个懒散的华尔兹调子。我们听着他磕磕绊绊地走过通道，他推门的时候，我们都警觉着。我想他是喝多了。他的帽子卷着，满脸通红，嘴唇撮成个O型。他站住了，人还有点晃，看了一圈房间，眯缝着眼看看阴暗处。口哨没了。嘴巴又变成一字，然后他舔舔嘴唇。“哈罗，”他说道。“查尔斯来了。”他眨眨眼。这时，他看到了我，和我的刀。

He put the scarlet cloth inside the hat and let them drop. He took out a cigarette.

他将深红色丝巾放到帽子里，然后一松手，任帽子落在地上。他拿出一支烟。

“You have found me out a villain.”

“你已经看出我是个坏人了。”

Gentleman had lit his cigarette, but apart from that had not moved. He turned to look at Charles, who had taken a couple of doubtful steps towards him. He put his hand to Charles’s hair. “So, Charley,” he said.

绅士早点着了烟卷，却拿着烟卷，一动不动。他转身望着查尔斯，后者正脚步迟疑地走上前去。他伸手去摸查尔斯的头发。“那么，查尔斯，”他说道。

“Don’t let him leave!” I said. “He’ll send for Dr Christie!” I waved my knife. “Charles, stop him!”

“别让他走！”我说道。“他会去找克里斯蒂医生！”我挥挥刀子。“查尔斯，拦住他！”

“There, there,” said Gentleman. He stroked Charles’s cheek. Mr Ibbs made a puffing sound with his lips. John got to his feet, then looked about him as if he did not know why he had done it. He blushed.

“行了，行了，”绅士说道。他摸摸查尔斯的脸。艾伯斯先生的嘴唇扑哧一声。约翰站起身来，然后看看周围，仿佛不知道自己为什么要站起来。他脸红了。

“Please, sir,” said Charles.

“求你了，先生，”查尔斯说道。

“Gentleman!” said Mrs Sucksby. “Listen to me. Sue has told us terrible things. I want you to go.”

“绅士，”萨克丝贝太太说道。“听我说。苏跟我们说了一些可怕的事儿。我希望你滚蛋。”

He folded his arms. “I shall stand if I like.”

约翰将胳膊抱在胸前。“我高兴站着，我就站着。”

Charles’s lip began to tremble. “Honest to God, Mr Rivers, I never meant to!”

查尔斯的嘴唇开始颤抖。“向老天保证，瑞富斯先生，我决不是有意的！”

“You’re fucking cool,” I said. I was shaking. “Here’s Mrs Sucksby and Mr Ibbs, know everything.”

“你真他妈的残忍，”我说道。我浑身颤抖着。“这儿有萨克丝贝太太和艾伯斯先生，他们什么都知道了。”

He laughed. “I should say they do.”

他大笑起来。“要我说，他们是什么都知道。”

“Sit down, John,” said Mrs Sucksby.

“坐下，约翰，”萨克丝贝太太说道。

“Hit me?” His voice was hoarse. “Hit them two, there!” He pointed to Gentleman and Charles. Mrs Sucksby took two quick steps, and struck him. She struck him hard. He put both his arms to his head and gazed at her from between his elbows.

“揍我？”他声音嘶哑。“先揍他们俩！”他指着绅士和查尔斯。萨克丝贝太太快步上前，给了他一记耳光。她出手很重。约翰胳膊抱着头，从两个胳膊肘中间望着她。

“Sit down, or I’ll hit you.”

“坐下，要不然我就揍你。”

“Is it down to me,” he said, “that small boys weep?”

“小毛孩子哭哭啼啼，”他说道，“跟我没关系吧？”

“You old cow!” he said. “You been down on me since the day I was born. You touch me again, you’ll know it!” His eyes blazed as he said it; but then, they filled with tears and he began to snivel. He walked to the wall, and kicked it. Charles shuddered and wept harder. Gentleman looked from one to the other, then gazed at Maud in pretend amazement.

“你个老母牛！”他说道。“从我生出来那一天起，你就瞧不上我。你再动我一下试试，我叫你知道厉害！”说着话，他眼睛里冒着火；可是随后，那双眼睛了就充满了泪水，他开始啜泣。他走到墙边，踢起墙来。查尔斯一怔，倒哭得更凶了。绅士看看这个，又看看那个，然后望着莫德，装出一副兴高采烈的样子。

“Fuck you, I ain’t small!” said John.

“操你妈，我不是毛孩子！”约翰说道。

“Will you be quiet?” said Maud, in her low, clear voice. “Charles, that’s enough.”

“你能消停点吗？”莫德用她那低沉又清晰的声音说道。“查尔斯，够了。”

Charles wiped his nose. “Yes, miss.”

查尔斯揉揉鼻子。“是，小姐。”

“I know you’re a filthy swindler,” I said. “But I knew that, six months ago. I was a fool, that’s all, to trust you.”

“我知道你是个下流的骗子。”我说道。“可我半年前才明白这一点。我是个傻瓜，如此而已，竟然信了你的话。”

Gentleman leaned against the post of the door, still smoking. “So, Suky,” he said. “You know all now.”

绅士斜靠在门板上，仍在抽烟。“那么，苏琪，”他说道。“现在你什么都知道了。”

“Dear girl,” said Mrs Sucksby quickly, with her eyes on Gentleman’s face. “Dear girl, the fools were me and Mr Ibbs, to let you.”

萨克丝贝太太眼睛望着绅士的脸，嘴里飞快地说道，“好姑娘，好姑娘，傻瓜是我和艾伯斯先生，竟然由着你去了。”

Gentleman had taken his cigarette from his mouth to blow against its tip. Now, hearing Mrs Sucksby and meeting her gaze, he stood quite still for a second with it held before his lips. Then he looked away and laughed — a disbelieving sort of laugh — and shook his head.

绅士从嘴里拿下烟卷，正要吹掉烟灰。这时，听了萨克丝贝太太的话，看到她的眼神，他将烟卷举在嘴边，一动不动地停了一秒。然后他转开目光，哈哈大笑起来——一阵并不信以为真的笑——还摇了摇头。

I thought she had shamed him.

我以为她先前羞辱了他。

“All right,” she said. “All right.” She lifted her hands.

“好了，”她说道。“好了。”她扬起双手。

“Mrs Sucksby,” he said.

“萨克丝贝太太，”他说道。

“Circumstances?” I said. “You mean, your having locked me up in a madhouse and left me to die? I should cut your bloody head off!”

“气氛？”我说道。“难道你说的，是你把我关进疯人院，任由我等死？我要割掉你的脑袋！”

He glanced at me. “Tell it to Sue,” he said. “She is looking at me with murder in her eyes. Under the circumstances, I don’t quite care for that.”

他瞟了我一眼。“这话要跟苏说，”他说道。“她眼露杀机，正瞪着我呢。在这种气氛下，我可没心思坐下来。”

“Sweet Christ,” he said quietly.

“可爱的基督啊，”他轻轻说道。

She stood, like a man on a raft — like she was afraid to make too sharp a move for fear of sinking. “Now, no more wildness. John, no more sulks. Sue, put that knife down, please, I beg you. No-one is to be harmed. Mr Ibbs. Miss Lilly. Dainty. Charles — Sue’s pal, dear boy — sit down. Gentleman. Gentleman.”

她站在那儿，好似一个站在船头的人——仿佛担心船会沉掉，于是动作不敢太急。“现在，再不要乱了。约翰，别生气了。苏，把刀放下，求你了，我求求你了。没谁会被害着了。艾伯斯先生。李小姐。达蒂。查尔斯——苏的小弟兄，好孩子——都坐下。绅士。绅士。”

He narrowed his eyes, made a face. “Do you know,” he said, “you have a very whining tone to your voice at times? Has no-one told you that?”

他眯起眼睛，做了个鬼脸。“你知不知道，”他说道，“有的时候，你声音里会有一种非常哀怨的腔调？没人跟你说起过吗？”

“No-one to be harmed. All right?”

“没谁会被害着了。行了吧？”

I made a lunge at him with the knife; but the truth was, I was still bewildered, and sick, and tired, and the lunge was a feeble one. He watched, not flinching, as I stood with the point of the blade before his heart.

我拿着刀，作势刺向他；可是，其实呢，我还是晕头涨脑的，很不舒服，十分疲惫，那一刺也是有气无力的。当我的刀尖在他心口前停住，他见了，也不躲闪。

Gentleman gazed at Maud, who had bound up her bleeding fingers in a handkerchief. He said, “I should like to have seen it.”

绅士望着莫德，她在用一块手帕包扎她出血的手指头。他说：“我真想看看。”

Then I grew afraid that the knife would shake and he would see it. I put it down. I put it down on the table — at the edge of the table, just beyond the circle of light that the lamp threw there.

这时我又担心刀身会抖起来，又会让他看到。我放下了刀。我将刀放在桌上——放在了桌边上，正好放在灯火投射过来的光圈外面。

John nodded. “She wants a half of your fortune.”

约翰点点头。“她想要你一半的钱。”

“Now, ain’t that nicer?” said Mrs Sucksby.

“好了，这不挺好的吗？”萨克丝贝太太说道。

“Does she?” said Gentleman, slowly.

“是吗？”绅士缓缓说道。

John’s tears had dried, but his face was dark — darker on one cheek than on the other, where Mrs Sucksby had hit him. He looked at Gentleman, but nodded to me. “She went for Miss Lilly just now,” he said. “Said she’d come to kill her.”

约翰的眼泪早干了，不过他一脸阴沉——有半边脸的颜色比另一半更甚，那是萨克丝贝太太打的。他望着绅士，却冲我点点头。“刚才她还奔着李小姐去呢，”他说道。“说她来就是要杀了她。”

“John, shut up,” said Mrs Sucksby. “Gentleman, don’t mind him. He is only making trouble. Sue said a half, but that was her passion talking. She ain’t in her right mind. She ain’t — ” She put a hand to her brow, and looked a little queerly about the room — at me, and at Maud. She pressed her fingers against her eyes. “If I might only,” she said, “have a moment, for thinking in!”

“约翰，闭嘴，”萨克丝贝太太说道。“绅士，别理他。他只是在瞎挑拨。苏说过一半，不过那是她一时性急，随口说说。她脑筋不太对头。她不是——”她手扶住额头，目光有些古怪地看看周围——看看我，又看看莫德。她手按住眼睛。“要是我能有点工夫，再仔细想想就好了！”

“Like you,” he answered, hanging his coat on a chair.

“就像你，”他答道，他将外套挂在椅子上。

“Too sticky,” said Mr Ibbs.

“麻烦太大了，”艾伯斯先生说道。

“Fuck you,” I said. “You fucking villain. You do what Mrs Sucksby says, all right?”

“操你妈，”我说道。“你个恶棍。你按照萨克丝贝太太的话做，明白吗？”

“Don’t let him go,” said Maud, to Mrs Sucksby.

“别让他走。”莫德对萨克丝贝太太说道。

Mr Ibbs gave a nod. Gentleman said, “You think perhaps I should go, make it simpler?”

艾伯斯先生点了一下头。绅士说道，“你觉得，或者我该走，好让事情简单点？”

Gentleman took off his coat. “Fuck me,” he said, as he did it; and he laughed, not nicely. “It’s too warm for work like this.”

绅士脱下外套。“耍我，”他边脱衣裳边说道；然后他哈哈大笑，却不是愉快的笑。“这天气，干这种活儿，太热了。”

“Are you mad?” I said. “Can’t you see, he’ll still do anything for his money? Don’t let him go! He’ll send for Dr Christie.”

“你疯了？”我说道。“你没看到吗，为了他的钱，他还是什么都肯做？不能让他走！他会捎信儿给克里斯蒂医生。”

He snorted. “You poor little bitch.”

他嗤之以鼻。“你这个可怜的小婊子。”

“Don’t you think of going anywhere,” said Mrs Sucksby, to Gentleman. He shrugged, his colour rising. “You wanted me to leave, two minutes ago!”

“你哪儿都别想去了，”萨克丝贝太太对绅士说道。他耸耸肩，脸色更红了。“就两分钟之前，你还想叫我走！”

“I have changed my mind.” She looked at Mr Ibbs; who looked away.

“我改主意了。”她望着艾伯斯先生；艾伯斯先生的眼睛却望着别处。

“You think so?”

“你这么觉得？”

“So am I,” said Mr Ibbs. He said it quietly. Gentleman caught his eye, and raised a brow.

“我也是，”艾伯斯先生说道。他轻轻的说出这句话。绅士与他对视一眼，扬起了一条眉毛。

“Sticky, wouldn’t you say, sir?”

“麻烦大了，你不觉得吗？先生？”

“Yes.”

“是的。”

“Think away,” said Gentleman easily, sourly. “I am longing to know what you will come up with.”

“想开点吧！”绅士轻飘飘，酸溜溜地说道。“我恭候着，就想听听你下面要说些什么。”

“What will?” said John.

“会怎么样？”约翰说道。

“Richard,” said Maud. She had got to her feet and was leaning upon the table. She said, “Listen to me. Think of all the filthy deeds you’ve ever done. This will be the worst, and will gain you nothing.”

“理查德，”莫德说道。她已站起身来，身子从桌子那边探过来。她说道，“听我说。想想你做过的所有的卑鄙下流的事。这一桩肯定是其中最卑鄙的，还会让你一无所获。”

But Gentleman snorted again. Tell me,” he said to Maud, “when you first started learning to be kind. What’s it to you, what Sue knows? — Dear me, how you blush! Not that thing, still? And do you look at Mrs Sucksby? Don’t say you care what she thinks! Why, you’re as bad as Sue. Look how you quake! Be bolder, Maud. Think of your mother.”

可是绅士再次嗤之以鼻。“告诉我，”他对莫德说道。“你最开始学着做一个好人的时候。感觉如何？苏知道些什么？——我亲爱的，你脸怎么红了！还不是为了那件事，竟然？你看到萨克丝贝太太了吗？可别说你在乎她的想法！为什么，你跟苏一样坏。瞧瞧你抖成什么样子了！胆子大一点，莫德。想想你的母亲。”

She had raised her hand to her heart. Now she jumped as if he had pinched her. He saw it, and laughed again. Then he looked at Mrs Sucksby. She had also given a kind of start at his words; and she stood, with her hand, like Maud’s, at her bosom, beneath that diamond brooch. Then she felt him looking, glanced quickly at Maud, and let her hand fall.

她原本手捂着心口。这时，她跳将起来，好象让他掐到了似的。他看在眼中，又笑起来。然后他望着萨克丝贝太太。她也从他的话语中得到了某种启示；她站在那儿，她的手，像莫德一样，也捂着心口，捂着那枚钻石胸针。而后，她感受到了他的注视，飞快地瞟一眼莫德，手落了下来。

Gentleman’s laughter died. He stood very still. “What’s this?” he said.

绅士的笑声刹住了。他定定地站着。“这是什么？”他说道。

“What’s what?” said John.

“什么怎么了？”约翰说道。

“Now then,” said Mrs Sucksby, moving. “Dainty –“

“那么好了，”萨克丝贝太太说着走动起来。“达蒂——”

“You see nothing,” said Maud, taking a step towards him, but glancing at me. “Richard, you see nothing.”

莫德抢步上前说道，“你什么都不明白，”她眼睛却盯着我。“理查德，你什么都不明白。”

“Oh!” said Gentleman. “Oh!” He watched her as she stepped about the table. Then he looked from her to Maud, in an excited sort of way, his colour rising higher. He put his hand to his hair and tugged it back from his brow.

“噢！”绅士说道。“噢！”她绕过桌边时，他一直望着她。然后，他目光在她和莫德二人之间瞄来瞄去，其中透着某种兴奋。他手捋过头发，将额发理到后面。

“Now I see it,” he said. He laughed; then the laugh broke off. “Oh, now I see it!”

“现在我明白了，”他说道，他大笑；然后笑声戛然而止。“噢，现在我明白了！”

“Poor you,” he said again, still laughing. Then he called: “Mr Ibbs, sir, did you know of this, too?”

“真有你的，”他又说一句，还笑个不停。然后他喊道：“艾伯斯先生，先生，你也知道这件事吗？”

He shook his head at her. “What a fool I’ve been, not to have guessed it sooner! Oh, this is marvellous! How long have you known? No wonder you’ve kicked and cursed! No wonder you’ve sulked! No wonder she’s let you! I always marvelled at that. Poor Maud!” He laughed, properly. “And, oh, Mrs Sucksby, poor you!”

他冲她摇头晃脑。“我可真是个大傻瓜，竟然没有能早点瞧出来！噢！这可真奇妙！你什么时候知道的？多久了？噢！难怪你又踢又骂！难怪你大发雷霆！难怪她要纵容你！我一直就觉得奇怪呢。可怜的莫德！”他又哈哈大笑。“还有，哦，萨克丝贝太太，真有你的！”

“That’s enough!” said Mrs Sucksby. “You hear me? I won’t have it spoke of!”

“够了！”萨克丝贝太太说道。“你听到没有？我是不会让别人说出这件事的！”

She also took a step towards him.

她朝着他，也上前一步。

Mr Ibbs did not answer.

艾伯斯先生没有答话。

“Know what?” asked John, his eyes like two dark points. He looked at me.

“知道什么？”约翰问道，他眼睛好象两个黑点一样。他望着我。

“Susie,” she said, “I want you to go. Take your pal and go.”

“苏西，”她说道，“我希望你走。带着你的小兄弟，赶紧走。”

“I’m not going anywhere,” I said.

“我哪儿也不去。”我说道。

“Know nothing,” said Maud. “Know nothing, nothing!”

“什么都不知道，”莫德说道。“什么都不知道，都不知道！”

“I don’t know,” I said.

“我也不知道。”我说道。

“Know what?”

“知道什么？”

“Afraid?” he answered. “You? I should say you never knew fear, in all your life. I should say your hard old leathery heart is beating perfectly quietly now, behind your hard old leathery breast.”

“怕了？”他答道。“你？要我说，你这辈子还从不知道什么叫害怕呢。要我说，现在你那颗铁石之心，在你那铁石铸成的胸腔里，跳得无比平静呢。”

I saw her put her hand upon the dark edge of the table, as if to guide herself about it. Mrs Sucksby saw it, too, I think. Perhaps she also saw something else. For she started, and then spoke quickly.

我看到她的手趁黑摸到桌边上，仿佛要指引她自己走过去。我觉得，萨克丝贝太太也看到了。或许，她还看到了别的什么事儿。因为她一怔，然后飞快地开口了。

“Richard,” said Maud, almost pleading.

“理查德，”莫德说道，几乎是哀求了。

She was still moving slowly forward, her eyes — that seemed almost black, now, and glittered worse than ever — all the time on Gentleman’s face.

她还在悄悄地往前挪步子，她的双眼——现在，几乎是纯黑色了，比先前更加幽亮逼人——一直盯着绅士的脸孔。

“No Susie, you stay,” said Gentleman, in a rich sort of voice. “Don’t mind Mrs Sucksby’s wishes. You have minded them too long. What are they to you, after all?”

“不是苏，你留下，”绅士用一种低沉的声音说道，“别管萨克丝贝太太的想法。你一直在乎她的想法，在乎得太久了。其实，她的想法对你来说，又算得什么呢？”

“Gentleman,” said Mrs Sucksby, her eyes still on Maud. “Dear boy. Be silent, will you? I am afraid.”

“绅士，”萨克丝贝太太说道，她眼睛还望着莫德。“好孩子。别说了，好吗？我怕了。”

I cannot say for certain what came next. I know that, hearing his words, I took a step towards him, meaning to strike him or make him be silent. I know that Maud and Mrs Sucksby reached him first.

接下来发生了什么事，我也说不清。我知道的是，听了他的话，我朝他奔了一步，我是想揍他，让他安静点。我知道是，莫德和萨克丝贝太太抢先到了他跟前。

“Feel that?” he said, with a glance at her bosom. “I don’t think so.” Then he smiled. “You may get your daughter to do it, however. She’s had practice.”

“感觉一下？”他瞄了一眼她的胸部，说道。“我可不这么想。”然后他笑了。“不过，你可以让你的女儿去感觉一下。她干过的。”

At his words, Mrs Sucksby’s face gave a twitch. She raised a hand to the bodice of her dress. “Feel it!” she said, moving her fingers. “Feel the motion here, then tell me I ain’t afraid!”

听了他的话，萨克丝贝太太的脸抽搐了一下。她抬手去摸自己身上的胸衣。“来感觉一下！”她手里摸索着说道。“先感觉一下这儿的跳动，再跟我说我不害怕！”

I do not know if Mrs Sucksby, when she darted, darted at him, or only — seeing Maud fly — at her. I know there was the gleam of something bright, the scuffle of shoes, the swish of taffeta and silk, the rushing of someone’s breath. I think a chair was scraped or knocked upon the floor.

我也不知道萨克丝贝太太她，她冲上去，是冲向绅士，还是——眼见莫德飞身扑过去——冲向莫德。我记得有什么东西闪了一下，脚步杂乱，塔夫绸和丝绸悉嗦有声，某个人深深地吸了一口气。我想是有把椅子划过地板，椅子腿撞得地板叮叮咚咚。

I know Mr Ibbs called out. “Grace! Grace!” he called: and even in the middle of all the confusion, I thought it a queer thing to call; until I realised it was Mrs Sucksby’s first name, that we never heard used.

我听到艾伯斯先生在嚷嚷。“格蕾丝！格蕾丝！”甚至在大伙儿乱作一团的时候，他也叫喊着，我本以为他嚷嚷的是什么怪事；后来才明白，这是萨克丝贝太太的名字，以前从没听到过的。

“Have you hit me?” he said. His voice was strange. Then I looked.

“你打我？”他说道。他的声音有些古怪。这时我才看过去。

He supposed he had only been punched. I think I supposed it, too. He had his hands at his stomach and was leaning forward, as if nursing the pain of the blow. Maud stood a little before him, but now moved away; and as she did I heard something fall, though whether it fell from her hand, or from his — or from Mrs Sucksby’s — I cannot tell you.

他以为他只是被人打了一记。我觉得我也这么想来着。他两手捂着肚子，身子朝前弓着，仿佛在缓释那一击的痛楚。莫德站在他面前，当时并未让到一旁去；当她让到旁边时，我听见有什么东西掉地上了，虽然听见了，那玩意究竟是从她手里掉出来的，还是从绅士手里——还是从萨克丝贝太太手里——我却也说不出。

And so, it was Mr Ibbs I was watching, when it happened. I didn’t see it when Gentleman began to stagger. But I heard him groan. It was a soft sort of groan.

所以，事情发生的时候，我在盯着艾伯斯先生呢。绅士开始踉跄了，我还什么都没看到。不过我听到他呻吟。那是一阵轻微的呻吟。

Mrs Sucksby was the closer to him. She was certainly the closer. She put her arm about him, and as he sagged she braced herself against his weight, and held him. “Have you hit me?” he said again.

萨克丝贝太太离他最近。她当然是看得最清楚的人。她胳膊扶住他，他人倒下来，她便整个人地迎上去，撑住他，拽住他。“你打我？”他又说一句。

“I don’t know,” she said.

“我不知道，”她说道。

I don’t think anyone knew. His clothes were dark, and Mrs Sucksby’s gown was black, and they stood in the shadows, it was hard to see.

我不认为有谁知道。他的衣裳是深色的，萨克丝贝太太的衣裳是黑色的，他们站在阴暗处，很难看得分明。

But at last he took a hand away from his waistcoat and held it before his face; and then we saw the white of his palm made dark with blood.

不过，最后，他将一只捂在马甲上的手伸到面前；然后，我们便看到他白皙的手掌上沾着血迹。

“Bring a light!” said Mrs Sucksby. “Bring a light!”

“拿灯来！”萨克丝贝太太说道。“拿灯来！”

Dainty shrieked.

达蒂惊叫起来。

“My God!” he said then.

“我的上帝啊！”于是他说道。

John caught up the lamp and held it, shaking. The dark blood turned suddenly crimson. Gentleman’s waistcoat and trousers were soaked with it, and Mrs Sucksby’s taffeta gown was red and running where she had held him. I had never seen blood run so freely. I had talked, an hour before, of murdering Maud. I had sharpened the knife. I had left the knife upon the table. It was not there now. I had never seen blood run, like this. I grew sick.

约翰提起灯，哆哆嗦嗦地拿在手中。那黑红色的血忽然间变成了深红色。绅士的马甲和裤子上都有血渗出来，萨克丝贝太太扶着他，她塔夫绸衣裳沾到他的地方都染红了，血渍还在扩大。我从没见过鲜血这样汩汩地冒出来。就在一个钟头之前，我还扬言要杀了莫德。我磨过那把刀。我把刀放在桌上。现在刀不在桌上了。我从没见过鲜血这样汩汩地冒出来。我有些头重脚轻了。

Mrs Sucksby gripped Gentleman’s arm. “Take your hand away,” she said. He still clutched his stomach.

萨克丝贝太太抓着绅士的胳膊。“你把手拿开，”她说道。他仍旧捂着肚子不放手。

“No,” I said.”No, no!”

“不，”我说道。“不。不！”

“Take your hand away!”

“把你的手拿开！”

“I can’t.”

“我不能。”

She wanted to see how deep the wound went. He grimaced, then drew off his fingers. There came, from a gash in his waistcoat, a bubble — like a bubble of soap, but swirling red — and then a spurt of blood, that fell and struck the floor with a splash — an ordinary splash, like water or soup would make. Dainty shrieked again. The light wobbled. ” Fuck! Fuck!” said John.

她想看看伤口有多深。他苦着脸，放开了手。就在他马甲的刀口上，有个气泡——跟肥皂泡一样，却是红色的，叫人头晕目眩的红色——这时又喷出一股血，血落在地上，溅开了——那印子很普通，跟汤汤水水撒在地上留下的印子一样。达蒂又尖叫一声。灯光摇晃起来。“我操！我操！”约翰说道。

“Set him down in a chair,” said Mrs Sucksby. “Fetch a cloth, for the cut. Fetch something to catch this blood. Fetch something, anything –“

“把他放到椅子上，”萨克丝贝太太说道。“找块布来，堵住伤口。找点什么来止血。找点什么东西来，什么都可以——”

They moved him, awkwardly, with grunts and sighs. They sat him on a hardbacked chair. I stood and looked on, while they did it — held still, I suppose, by horror; though I am ashamed now, that I did nothing.

他们搬动他，手忙脚乱地，嘴里嘀咕着，叹着气。他们把他放进一张硬背椅子里。他们忙活的时候，我就站在一旁看着——一动不动，我觉得，是被吓得；话虽这么说，我现在还是很不好意思，当时没帮上忙。

“Help me,” said Gentleman. “Help me. Oh, Christ!”

“救救我，”绅士说道。“救救我。噢！天哪！”

The sound of the blood striking the china — and the sight of the red of it, against the white, and against that great dark eye — was worse than anything.

那种血滴落在瓷器上的声音——还有那画面，血的红，反衬着瓷器的白，反衬着那只又大又黑的眼睛——真是触目惊心。

“Oh, Christ!” he said again. “Oh, Christ, I’m dying!” In between the words, he moaned — a shuddering, chattering moan, that he could not help or stop. “Oh, Jesus, save me!”

“噢，老天！”他又说道。“噢，老天，我要死了！”言语间他还不住呻吟——颤抖的呻吟，他忍不住，要么就是。“噢，老天，救救我！”

Mr Ibbs plucked a towel from a hook on the wall and Mrs Sucksby knelt at Gentleman’s side and held it against the wound. Each time he moved or took his hand from his stomach, the blood spurted. “Fetch a bucket or a pot,” she said again; and finally Dainty ran to the door, caught up the chamber-pot that had been left there, and brought it and set it down beside the chair.

艾伯斯先生从墙上的挂钩上拽下一条毛巾，萨克丝贝太太跪在绅士旁边，她抓过毛巾，按在伤口上。每次他动动身子，或将按在肚子上的手拿开，血就会喷出来。“找个桶来，要么找个罐儿来，”她又说一遍；最后是达蒂跑到门口，抓起落在那儿的夜壶，拿过来放在椅子下面。

Gentleman heard it and grew frightened.

绅士也听到那个声音，他忽然害怕起来。

“There now,” said Mrs Sucksby, touching his face. “There now. Be brave. I’ve seen women lose blood like this, from a baby; and live to tell of it.”

“行了，好了，”萨克丝贝太太抚摸着他的脸说道。“行了，好了。勇敢点。我见过好些女人也这样流血呢，就为了生个孩子；都活得好好的，还聊起这些事儿呢。”

“Not like this!” he said. “Not like this! I’m cut. How badly am I cut? Oh, Christ! I need a surgeon. Do I?”

“那跟我可不一样！”他说道。“跟我不一样！我被人捅了。我伤得多重？噢，老天爷啊！我得看医生。不是吗？”

“Bring him liquor,” said Mrs Sucksby, to Dainty; but he shook his head.

“给他灌点酒，”萨克丝贝太太对达蒂说道；可他却摇摇头。

“No liquor. A smoke, though. In my pocket, here.” He dipped his chin to his waistcoat, and John fished in the folds and brought out a packet of cigarettes, and another of matches. Half of the cigarettes were soaked with blood, but he found one that was dry, lit it at his own mouth, then put it in Gentleman’s.

“不要酒。来支烟。在我口袋里。”他下巴伸着，指示着自己的马甲。约翰在衣服里摸索片刻，找出一盒烟，和一盒火柴。有一半的烟泡着血，不过他找到一根干净的，放在自己嘴里点着了，再塞到绅士嘴里。

“How did this happen?” he said.

“怎么会这样？”他说道。

“Good boy,” said Gentleman, coughing. But he winced, and the cigarette fell. John caught it up in trembling fingers and set it back between his lips. He coughed again. More blood oozed up between his hands. Mrs Sucksby took the towel away and wrung it — wrung it, as if it were filled with water. Gentleman began to shake.

“好孩子，”绅士说道，他咳嗽起来，人却一激灵，香烟掉了。约翰颤抖着手，捡了起烟，把烟放回绅士嘴里。绅士又咳。又有好多血，从他两手之间冒出来。萨克丝贝太太拿开毛巾，绞了绞——仿佛那毛巾吸饱了水。绅士开始浑身颤抖。

I looked at Maud. She had not moved since stepping from him as he began to fall. She had kept still as me, her eyes upon his face.

我望着莫德。自从她闪开去，他倒下来，莫德就一动不动。她跟我一样，一动不动的，眼睛盯着他的脸。

“Dear boy, be still,” she said, still pressing the towel to the cut. He cried out in pain and fear.

“好孩子，别动，”她说道，手里还按着伤口上的毛巾。他疼得叫起来，同时惊恐万分。

“No surgeons here,” he said firmly. “No men like that, to this house.”

“这儿没外科医生。”他沉着地说道。“那种人不能来这儿。”

I think Dainty took a step. Mr Ibbs caught her arm.

我觉得达蒂迈了一步出去。艾伯斯先生拽住她的胳膊。

John put down the lamp and raised his hand to his eyes. He was weeping and trying to hide it.

约翰放下灯，抬手遮住眼睛。他哭了，又想掩饰。

“Damn you!” he said. “You bitches! John –“

“你个该死的！”他说道。“你们这些臭婊子！约翰——”

“John, go for a surgeon! Johnny! I’ll pay you! Fuck! ” The blood spurted again. Now his face was white, his whiskers black but matted, here and there, with red, his cheek gleaming like lard.

“约翰，去找个外科医生来！小约翰！我会给你钱！我操！”血又喷出来。这时他面色惨白，他的胡须是黑色的，却一撮撮地沾着血，粘在一起，他脸上闪着油光，像猪油一样。

“How can this be?” He looked wildly about him — at John, at Mr Ibbs, at me. “Why do you stand and watch me? Bring a doctor. Bring a surgeon!”

“怎么能这样？”他目光狂乱地环顾四周——看看约翰，看看艾伯斯先生，又看看我。“你干吗站在那儿干看着？找医生去。找外科医生来！”

“No men like that?” cried Gentleman. The cigarette fell. “What are you saying? Look at me! Christ! Don’t you know a crooked man? Look at me! I’m dying! Mrs Sucksby, you love me. Bring a man, I beg you.”

“那种人不能来？”绅士叫道。香烟又掉下来了。“你在说什么？看看我！天哪！你连个江湖医生都不认得吗？看看我吧！我快死了！萨克丝贝太太，你心疼我。找个人来吧，我求求你了。”

John shook his head. “I can’t! Don’t ask me!”

约翰摇摇头。“我不能去！别找我！”

Gentleman turned to me. “Suky!” he said. “Suky, they’ve killed me –“

绅士转向我。“苏琪！”他说道。“苏琪！他们搞死我了——”

“Damn you!” he said softly. He had begun to cry. “Who is there who’ll help me? I’ve money, I swear it. Who is there? Maud?”

“你们这些该死的！”他轻轻地说道。他开始哭泣。“有谁？谁能救我？我有钱，我发誓我有钱。谁来救我？莫德？”

“No surgeons,” said Mr Ibbs again, when I looked at him. “Bring a man like that, and we’re done for.”

当我看着艾伯斯先生时，他重复一句，“没外科医生，把那种人找来，我们就都完蛋了。”

“Take him to the street,” I said. “Can’t you? Call a doctor to the street.”

“把他抬到街上去，”我说道。“不行吗？叫医生到街上来。”

“He is cut too bad. Look at him. It would bring them here. There is too much blood.”

“他伤得太重。看看他。这伤势会把他们引到这儿来。这儿有这么多血。”

There was. It now almost filled the china pot. Gentleman’s moans had begun to grow fainter.

确实如此。瓷罐里的血都快装满了。绅士的呻吟声开始变的微弱。

Her cheek was almost as pale as his, her lip quite white.

她的脸几乎跟他一样惨白，她的嘴唇也是苍白的。

She shook her head. Then she said, in a whisper: “I am sorry. I am sorry.”

她摇摇头，随后低声说道，：“我很抱歉。我很抱歉。”

“God damn you! Help me! Oh! ” He coughed. There came, in the spittle at his mouth, a thread of crimson; and then, a moment later, a gush of blood. He raised a feeble hand to it — saw the fresh red upon his fingers — and his look grew wild. He reached, out of the circle of lamp-light, and began to struggle, as if to raise himself from the chair. He reached for Charles. “Charley?” he said, the blood bubbling and bursting about the word. He clutched at Charles’s coat and made to draw him closer. But Charles would not come. He had stood all this time in the shadows, a look of fixed and awful terror on his face. Now he saw the bubbles at Gentleman’s lips and whiskers, Gentleman’s red and slippery hand gripping the coarse blue collar of his jacket, and he twitched like a hare. He turned and ran. He ran, the way I had brought him — along the passage to Mr Ibbs’s shop. And before we could call to him or go to him to make him stop, we heard him tear open the door then shriek, like a girl, into Lant Street: “Murder! Help! Help! Murder!”

“你要遭天谴！救救我！噢！”他咳嗽起来。他喷出的口水中，多了一丝深红；随后，只过了片刻，便又喷出一口血来。他手软绵绵地抬起，去抹那股血——却看到指头上的鲜红色——他的神情变得狂乱。他伸出手，伸向灯光外围，还开始挣扎，似乎要自己从椅子上立起来。他手伸向查尔斯。“查尔斯？”他说道。说话间，伴着血沫，血又喷出来。他抓住查尔斯的外套，想把他拽近点。可查尔斯不肯去。他一直站在暗处，满脸恐惧，脸上肉都僵住了。这时，他看到绅士唇边和胡须上的血沫，绅士手上一片殷红，黏糊糊的，还死命拽着他夹克的粗布蓝领，查尔斯跳起来又扯又拽，像只野兔一样。他转身撒腿就跑，沿我带他来的路，顺着通道跑进艾伯斯先生的店里。我们都还没来得及喝止他，也没来得及上前去拦住他，就听得他一把拉开店门，像个娘们儿一样，冲着蓝特街尖叫起来：“杀人啦！救命啊！救命啊！杀人啦！”

“Maud? Maud?” he said.

“莫德？莫德？”他说道。

At that we all, save Mrs Sucksby and Maud, sprang back. John made for the shop.

一听到这话，我们全体，除了萨克丝贝太太和莫德，都跳起来了。约翰要奔到店里去。

“Too late!” said Mr Ibbs. “Too late.” He held up his hand. John stood and listened.

“来不及了！”艾伯斯先生说道。“来不及了。”他伸手拦下约翰。约翰停脚站住，听候艾伯斯先生的吩咐。

There had come a swirl of hot wind from the open shop-door and it carried with it what I thought at first was the echo of Charles’s cry; then the sound grew stronger, and I understood it was an answering shout, perhaps from the window of a house nearby. In a second it was joined by another. Then it was joined by this — the worst sound of all, to us — the sound of a rattle, rising and falling on the gusting wind; and drawing nearer.

从敞开的店门外吹进来一股热气，裹挟着一阵动静，我起先以为那是查尔斯叫声的回音；后来这动静变得陌生了，我明白了，这是旁人的呼喝，可能就是旁边人家传出来的。不消一秒钟，便有更多呼喊纷纷响起。这时又有一个声音出现了——对我们来说，是这其中最麻烦的，一阵喀嚓喀嚓的动静，动静越来越大，盖过了风声；也越来越近。

“We might take him,” he said to Mrs Sucksby. He looked at me, and then at Maud. “We might take him between us, if we are quick.”

“我们可以带他走，”他对萨克丝贝太太说道。他看着我，然后又看看莫德。“只要我们麻利点儿，我们可以架着他走。”

“The blues!” said John. He turned, and came to Dainty. “Dainty, run!” he said. She stood for a second, then went — the back way — tearing the bolts from their cradles. — “Go on!” he said, when she looked back. But he did not go with her. Instead, he went to Gentleman’s side.

“雷子！”约翰说道。他转过身，来到达蒂跟前。“达蒂，快跑！”他说道。她呆了一下，然后拔腿就跑——跑到后门——拉开门把手上的插销。——“快跑呀！”他见她回头张望，便说道。而他并未随她一起跑路。相反，他走到绅士身边。

Mrs Sucksby shook her head. Gentleman’s own head hung low upon his breast. The blood still bubbled at his lip; burst, and bubbled again.

萨克丝贝太太摇摇头。绅士自个儿的脑袋耷拉在胸前。他嘴里还在冒血沫；喷一口血，便又冒一阵血沫。

But he did not go; and I knew — and know, still — that I wouldn’t have followed, if he had. I was held there, as if by a charm. I looked at Mr Ibbs. He had run to the wall beside his brazier and, as I watched, he drew out one of the bricks. I only found out later that he kept money there, privately, in an old cigarette box. He put the box inside his waistcoat. Then he began to look about him, at the china, the knives and forks, the ornaments on the shelves: he was looking to see what there might be, that he could be done for. He did not look at Gentleman or Mrs Sucksby. He did not look at me — once he came near me, and thrust me aside, to reach past me for a porcelain cup; and when he had got it he dashed it to the floor. When Charley Wag rose up and gave a strangled sort of bark, he kicked him.

可他却不肯走；而我心里清楚——我心里还是清楚的——要是他跑路，我也不会跟着他。我守在那儿，仿佛中了邪一般。我望着艾伯斯先生。他早就跑到火盆边的墙壁跟前了，我张望的时候，他正抽出一块砖来。我马上就看明白了，他的钱藏在那儿呢，藏在一个旧香烟盒里。他将盒子塞到马甲里。然后环顾四周，看看瓷器，刀叉，壁炉架上的摆设：他在寻摸，看有什么玩意可以让他报销一下。至于绅士和萨克丝贝太太，他连看也不看一眼。他也不看我——他走到我跟前，拨开我，伸手越过我去拿一个瓷杯子；拿到手之后，便摔在地板上。

“Do you hear that?” he said weakly.

“你听到这动静了吗？”他虚弱地说道。

“Save yourself,” she said to John. “Take Sue.”

“你自己跑吧，”她对约翰说道。“带上苏。”

Meanwhile, the sound of shouts and rattles grew close. Gentleman lifted his head. There was blood on his beard, on his cheek, at the corner of his eye.

这时，查理威格立起身子，呜咽着叫了一声，他便给了它一脚。与此同时，叫喊声和喀嚓声都近了。绅士抬起头来。他胡子上有血，脸上有血，眼角上也是血。

“What sound is it?”

“是什么声音？”

“You know what follows?”

“你知道接下来会有什么事儿吗？”

She put her red hands over his. “The sound of Fortune,” she said. She looked at me, and then at Maud. “You might run.”

她沾了血迹的双手覆在他手上。“是钱财的声音。”她说道。她看看我，又看看莫德。“你们好跑路了。”

“Dear boy, I do,” said Mrs Sucksby. She still knelt at his side.

“好孩子，我听到了，”萨克丝贝太太说道，她还跪在他身旁。

She nodded. Mrs Sucksby glanced again at me, and then again at Maud, then closed her eyes. She sighed, as if weary.

她点点头。萨克丝贝太太又看我一眼，再望着莫德，然后闭起双眼。她叹了一口气，仿佛已经筋疲力尽了。

I said nothing. Maud shook her head. “Not from this,” she answered. “Not now.”

我一言不发。莫德摇摇头。“我不逃避，”她答道。“现在不逃避了。”

“You shall not lose me!” I cried; and her eyes flew open, and she held my gaze for a second, as if not understanding. Then she looked at John. He had tilted his head.

“你不会失去我！”我哭叫道；她眼睛睁开来，盯着我的眼睛，似乎没有领会。然后她望着约翰。他歪着头。

“To have lost you once, dear girl,” she said. “And now, to lose you again –“

“先前就失去过你一次，好姑娘”她说道。“如今，又要失去你——”

“Here they come!” he said.

“他们来了！”他说道。

Mr Ibbs heard him, and ran; but he got no further than that dark little court at the back of the house before a policeman picked him up and brought him back again; and by then, two more policemen had made their way into the kitchen by the shop. They looked at Gentleman, and at the chamber-pot of blood, and — what we had not thought to look for or to hide — at the knife, which had got kicked into the shadows and had blood upon it; and they shook their heads. — As policemen tend to do when they see things like that, in the Borough.

艾伯斯先生听了他的话，狂奔而去；可是，没等他跑出房后那个阴暗的小院，就被一个警察截住，又给押回来了；这时候，另外两个警察从前面店里过来，进到厨房中。他们看看绅士，又看看那个盛着血的夜壶，还看到——我们都没想到要找出来，或藏起来的——那把刀，不知被谁踢到暗处，上面还有血。他们都摇着头。——这正是警察们在镇子上见到类似场面时，都会有的反应。

But Mrs Sucksby rose from Gentleman’s side. Her taffeta dress was soaked in his blood, the brooch of diamonds at her bosom turned to a brooch of rubies. Her hands were crimson, from fingertip to wrist. She looked like the picture of a murderess from one of the penny papers.

可是萨克丝贝太太却从绅士身旁站起身来。她的塔夫绸衣裳上面，沾得到处都是血，胸前的钻石胸针也变成了红宝石胸针。她一手的血，从手指尖儿到手腕。她的样子，看起来像是小报照片上的女杀人犯。

“This is nasty work, ain’t it?” they said. This is very bad. Let’s see how bad.”

“这是个很严重的案子，不是吗？”他们说道。“这可真糟糕。我们看看有多糟。”

They took hold of Gentleman’s hair and drew back his head, and felt for the pulse at his neck; and then they said, “This is filthy murder. Now, who done it?”

他们抓着绅士的头发，把他的脑袋提溜起来，又摸摸他脖子上的脉动；然后他们说道，“这是卑鄙的谋杀。好了，谁干的？”

“I done it,” she said. “Lord knows, I’m sorry for it now; but I done it. And these girls here are innocent girls, and know nothing at all about it; and have harmed no-one.”

“我干的，”她说道。“老天知道，现在我后悔了；不过是我干的。这儿的这些姑娘，都是清白的姑娘。这件事儿她们什么都不知道；也不会伤害到别人。”

Maud moved, or took a step. But John moved quicker.

莫德动了动，也许是走了一小步。可约翰的手脚更麻利。

I saw him, and heard him, but could not act. I only said, “What –?” and Maud, I think, also cried out, “What –?” or “Wait –!”

我眼见他如此，耳中听得他的言话，却不知该如何行动。我只有说，“什么——？”而莫德，我觉得，她也叫了一声，“什么——？”，要么就是“等等——！”

“She done it,” he said, without a hesitation. His cheek was darker than ever, where he had been struck before. He lifted his arm and pointed. “She done it. I saw her.” He pointed at Mrs Sucksby.

“她干的。”他毫不迟疑地说道。他脸上先前被扇过的地方，颜色更加浓重了。他扬起胳膊指过去。“她干的。我看到是她。”他指着萨克丝贝太太。